Empowered Goal Setting

www.dianazilly.com

Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor (LCPC)

Fellow in Clinical Hypnotherapy Master of Arts in Psychology Master of Science in Mental Health

Counseling Adjunct Faculty teaching Psychology at JJC Private Practice in Joliet Red-high belt rank in Tae Kwon Do Currently studying Ashtanga Yoga

About Diana

Anxiety disorders Emotional Eating, Binge Eating OCD, PTSD Hoarding Compulsive hair pulling, skin picking Smoking Cessation Stress Management, Grief, Personal

Development

Areas of Treatment

Making goals that will actually happen through empowerment rather than avoidance of negative consequences

Getting rid of procrastination Understand the role of anxiety in goal

avoidance Using the mindset of hypnotherapy Using the martial arts philosophy

What is Empowered Goal Setting?

Avoidance of an unpleasant task Putting it off and doing everything else under

the sun Finally doing the task once the stakes are too

high Associated with very strong unpleasant

emotions Usually anxiety-based Lots of negative energy Where is the mindset aimed? (negativity)

Procrastination

Polarized, black and white thinking increases the amount of avoidance and procrastination

General goals seem overwhelming and insurmountable Success or failure mindset leads to anxiety Sense of self in terms of “good” or “bad”, “success” or

“failure” Sets up polarized “doing” or “not doing” where “doing”

means that you envision your goal as being done completely, perfectly, matching an idealized standard

All or Nothing

Begin with the end in mind Where do you want to drive your CAR? Choice, Action, Reward Break the goal into small steps The reward comes after the action Awareness, choice, outcome

Hypnotherapy

Goals are usually stated in ways that are too broad and undefined, making them difficult to achieve: Lose weight, exercise, get organized, finish school, clean

the house, get ready for the holidays, etc. Goals can be very small, such as:

getting through the day eating an apple for a snack (if you are getting rid of that afternoon candy bar)

going to a party and eating only one helping of food exercising for 10 minutes in the morning before work driving straight to work/home (no stops for junk food)

What are Goals?

What is the likelihood that someone will go workout when you hear him say, “I’m going to try to workout today”? (highly unlikely!)

Demonstrate difference between trying and doing

Trying is the new dirty word Why is it so hard to do things that we know

we want to do?

Trying Versus Doing

Board Break Mentality

The Power of the Focused Mind 180 degree rotation for an elbow break The mind is focused on the outcome, where

the body part has to be after the break, NOT the board being broken

The board does not matter What happens if you focus on the board? The outcome is what matters

Board Break Mentality

Begin with the end in mind Stay focused on the outcome, not the task Use positive energy words to “make the

Velcro” and create motivation Take a strong, neutral stance while

completing the task Remember that motivation is movement

toward your goal.

Hypnotherapy=Board Break Mentality

Broad statements are too general, too vague, and too unattainable if you are stuck in procrastination

Example: I want to lose weight. I want to exercise.

Sure you do. What does that really mean? Narrow down your goal statement. Operationalize it. Positive, Present tense, plausible, precise,

personal

Goal Statements

Positive, present tense, plausible, personal, precise

Positive: Order what you want off the menu. Say what you want, not what you don’t want

Present tense: Stated in a way that reflects the here and now

Plausible: Baby steps, realistic, a little at a time Personal: It’s just for you, not anyone else Precise: Measurable and able to be tracked Use a positive emotion word to make the

statement more powerful.

The 5 “P” approach

I feel vibrant eating a healthy breakfast every day. (Decide what “healthy” means, such as eating fruit, eating an egg, etc.)

Feeling proud, I exercise for 20 minutes 3 days per week.

I confidently stay on budget every day and spend money wisely.

Each day, I feel excited finding the things I do well. I easily correct my errors.

Examples

Strong emotions make memories stick like glue. Get excited about your life and use strong resilient emotions in your self talk.

Practice saying and feeling your goal statements several times throughout the day, especially at times when you have to make choices, such as with eating or exercising.

Treat the goal statement formula as thought it were a recipe. Cook with it. Taste it. See how you like it. Add and change the ingredients of the recipe to make it suitable for your own life and goals.

Strong Emotions

Goals must first be manifested in the mind before they can be acted upon. Use visualization to reinforce your mindset so that you can act on your goal.

Organize your plan to take steps each day toward achieving your goal. Educate yourself if you need more information. Surround yourself with people who are supportive of your efforts. Be persistent.

We live from one breath to the next. Stay on today. Replace negative thoughts with resilient thoughts.

Visualize the Outcome

Using a Team and Visualizing

Get out of the habit using “good” or “bad” in terms of how you are feeling or how you are assigning emotions to an outcome.

These are polarizing emotions. Practice using emotions such as “energized, confident, calm, joyful, happy, strong, attractive” to accurately identify how you want to feel as a result of making your choice and taking action.

The Battle of Good and Bad

Be realistic and identify small, achievable goals that will lead you toward your desired outcome

Reward yourself along the way. Notice the way your mind and body feel as a result of taking action.

Understand that in terms of emotional eating, you will probably want to start with non-food goals and have NSV (Non-Scale Victories) that will give you improved ability to handle the anxiety of emotional eating.

Baby Steps

Thank You

www.dianazilly.com