Emotional Intelligence sets apart good leaders - an introductory workshop Ian Govier (Facilitator)

Emotional Emotional IntelligenceIntelligence sets apart good leaderssets apart good leaders

- an introductory workshop- an introductory workshop

Ian Govier(Facilitator)

opportunitynowhereopportunitynowhere

What I wanted to What I wanted to be when I grew up.. be when I grew up..

If I wasn’t a nurse, I’d be..If I wasn’t a nurse, I’d be..

When I retire I’m going to…When I retire I’m going to…

What I want to achieve What I want to achieve or change as a result or change as a result

of this workshop? of this workshop?

The same 5 common themes The same 5 common themes emerge from each emerge from each

inquiry.inquiry.

Since the inception of the NHS, Since the inception of the NHS, more than 50 NHS public inquiries more than 50 NHS public inquiries have been conducted to address have been conducted to address

catastrophic failures in patient care. catastrophic failures in patient care.

Walshe & Higgins (2002)Walshe & Higgins (2002)

Disempowerment of Disempowerment of staff and patients staff and patientsDisempowerment of Disempowerment of staff and patients staff and patients

IsolationIsolationIsolationIsolation

Poor Poor communicationcommunication

Poor Poor communicationcommunication

Inadequate Inadequate leadership / leadership / managementmanagement

Inadequate Inadequate leadership / leadership / managementmanagement

Failure of Failure of systems systems and and processesprocesses

Failure of Failure of systems systems and and processesprocesses

““Emotional Emotional Intelligence Intelligence

Sets Apart Sets Apart Good Leaders”Good Leaders”

What is What is Emotional Emotional

Intelligence?Intelligence?

EQ embraces two EQ embraces two aspects of intelligence:aspects of intelligence:

• Understanding yourself, Understanding yourself, your goals, your goals, intentions, intentions, responses & behaviourresponses & behaviour

• Understanding others Understanding others & their feelings & their feelings

•“Being nice”•Letting feelings

hang out”

Emotional Intelligence (EQ)Emotional Intelligence (EQ)The ability to perceive emotions, to

access and generate emotions so as to assist thought, to understand emotions

and emotional knowledge, and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to

promote emotional and intellectual growth

Mayer and Salovey, 1990•a field in infancy

•fast-growing

•aspects hearken to research of the 1940’s

•a field in infancy

•fast-growing

•aspects hearken to research of the 1940’s

another definition...another definition...

• "Emotional intelligence is the ability to sense, understand, and effectively apply the power and acumen of emotions as a source of human energy, information, connection, and influence."

• Dr. Robert K. Cooper Executive EQ: Emotional Intelligence in Leadership and Organizations, 1996.

and another definition...and another definition...

• "Emotional Intelligence is a way of recognising, understanding, and choosing how we think, feel, and act. It shapes our interactions with others and our understanding of ourselves. It defines how and what we learn; it allows us to set priorities; it determines the majority of our daily actions. Some research suggests it is responsible for as much as 80% of the "success" in our lives."

• Freedman et al. Handle With Care: Emotional Intelligence Activity Book, 1998

and yet another definition...and yet another definition...

• "Emotional Intelligence is the intelligent use of thoughts and emotions, heart and mind working harmoniously. It’s the ability to

use the power of your emotions as a source of information, motivation and connection."

• Randi B. Noyes. The Art of Leading Yourself – tap the power of your Emotional Intelligence, 2004.

In other words, EQ is about……In other words, EQ is about……

• Knowing how you and others feel and Knowing how you and others feel and what to do about itwhat to do about it

• Knowing what feels good and what feels Knowing what feels good and what feels bad, and how to get from bad to goodbad, and how to get from bad to good

• Possessing emotional awareness, Possessing emotional awareness, sensitivity and the management skills sensitivity and the management skills that will help us to maximise our long that will help us to maximise our long term happiness and survival term happiness and survival

EQEQ - seeing the - seeing the

bigger picturebigger picture

Like a tip of a great Like a tip of a great iceberg, the true iceberg, the true significance of our significance of our

emotional intelligence is emotional intelligence is only now being only now being

uncovered uncovered (Dr.Stephen R. Covey, 2004)(Dr.Stephen R. Covey, 2004)

An elephant is like a fan

An elephant is like a wall

An elephant is like a spear

An elephant is like a tree

An elephant is like a snake

An elephant is like a

rope

““Best Boss – Best Boss – Worst Boss”Worst Boss”

From your career experiencesFrom your career experiences identify the key characteristics identify the key characteristics

of your Best Boss / Worst Boss of your Best Boss / Worst Boss

Break Break TimeTime

The Components of The Components of Emotional Intelligence (EQ)Emotional Intelligence (EQ)

• Self-Awareness

• Self (Emotion) Management

• Empathy• Social Skills (Relationships)

• Motivation

(Daniel Goleman, 1995)

Emotional Intelligence StarEmotional Intelligence Star

EmpathySocial skills

Self manageme

nt / regulation

Motivation

Self awareness

Self-AwarenessSelf-Awareness

The ability to recognize and understand your moods, emotions, and drives, as well as their effect on others

Emotional self awareness Accurate self-assessment Self-confidence

‘‘0 wad some Power 0 wad some Power the giftie gie us the giftie gie us

To see oursels as To see oursels as ithers see us!’ ithers see us!’

Robert BurnsRobert Burns

How are How are you you

feeling?feeling? (naming and describing our

emotions)

Group exercise

There are considered to be six basic emotions which have universally recognizable facial expressions:

Surprise, Fear, Happiness, Anger, Sadness & Disgust.

Emotional self-awarenessEmotional self-awareness

• The inability to notice our true feelings can leave us at the mercy of others.

• People with greater certainty about their feelings are often better pilots of their lives

and have a surer sense about how they feel about personal decisions.

The value of taking time for self- The value of taking time for self- awareness requires an ability:awareness requires an ability:

• to recognize appropriate body cues and emotions

• to label cues and emotions accurately• to stay open to unpleasant as well as

pleasant emotions• to include the capacity for experiencing and

recognizing multiple and conflicting emotions

EQ EQ Awareness Awareness

TestTest

Group exercise

Self Awareness & ConflictSelf Awareness & Conflict

The The ‘DESC’‘DESC’ Script Script

• DDescribe the situationescribe the situation

• EExpress how you xpress how you FEELFEEL

• SSpecify what you wantpecify what you want

• CConsequences which will result, onsequences which will result, positive or negative positive or negative


Self manageme

nt / regulation

Self awareness

Self-ManagementSelf-Management

• The ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods

• The propensity to suspend judgement to think before acting

Self-control

Trustworthiness

Conscientious

Adaptability

Achievement orientation

Initiative

Creating & Creating & developing developing

TRUSTTRUSTGroup exercise

Be trusting Be trusting yet be wise!yet be wise!

Between what happens to us Between what happens to us and our response to it….and our response to it….

……..is our freedom to ..is our freedom to choose our responsechoose our response


Empathy

Self manageme

nt / regulation

Self awareness

EmpathyEmpathy

• The ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people

• Skill in treating people according to their emotional reactions

Empathy Organisational Awareness Workplace orientation

Developing Developing empathyempathy

Group exercise

Developing empathy links toDeveloping empathy links to

• Greater emotional stability

• Greater interpersonal sensitivity

• Better educational performance

Developing empathy



Self manageme

nt / regulation

Self awareness

Social Skills• Proficiency in managing relationships

and building networks

• An ability to find common ground and build rapport

Visionary Leadership

Influence

Developing Others

Communication

Change catalyst

Building bonds

Teamwork and collaboration

P

The art of social relationships--The art of social relationships--managing emotions in othersmanaging emotions in others

• To excel at people skills means having and using the competencies to be an effective friend, negotiator, and LEADER.LEADER. One should be able to guide an interaction, inspire others, make others comfortable in social situations, and influence and persuade others.

socialskills



Self manageme

nt / regulation

Motivation

Self awareness

MotivationMotivation

• A passion to work for reasons that go beyond money or status

• A propensity to pursue goals with energy and persistence

Strong drive to achieve Organisational commitment Optimism even in the face of failure

How do we How do we develop these develop these

components in the components in the RCN CLP?RCN CLP? Group Work

Self-AwarenessSelf-Management

EmpathySocial SkillsMotivation

What has EQ What has EQ got to do got to do with improving with improving

patient care?patient care?

Ten Habits of Emotionally Ten Habits of Emotionally Intelligent PeopleIntelligent People (Hein, 1999)

• Label their feelings, rather than labelling people Label their feelings, rather than labelling people or situationsor situations

• Distinguish between thoughts and feelingsDistinguish between thoughts and feelings

• Take responsibility for their feelings.Take responsibility for their feelings.

• Use their feelings to help make their decisionsUse their feelings to help make their decisions

• Show respect for other people’s feelingsShow respect for other people’s feelings

Ten Habits of Emotionally Ten Habits of Emotionally Intelligent PeopleIntelligent People

• Feel energised not angryFeel energised not angry

• Validate others’ feelingsValidate others’ feelings

• Practise getting a positive value from their negative Practise getting a positive value from their negative emotionsemotions

• Don’t advise, command, control, criticize, blame or Don’t advise, command, control, criticize, blame or judge othersjudge others

• Avoid people who invalidate them or don’t respect Avoid people who invalidate them or don’t respect their feelingstheir feelings



Self manageme

nt / regulation

Motivation

Self awareness

Final Final

Thoughts!Thoughts!

What will What will I do differentlyI do differently as a result as a result

of this of this workshop?workshop?

Melissa Fitzpatrick (2005), former editor-in-chief of

Nursing Management, wrote:

‘To the public these ads

showcase diversity, intelligence,

competence, and caring - the essence

of nursing.’

So you may have the brains So you may have the brains and the technical ability and the technical ability

of your of your profession…profession…

……but have you but have you got the touch? got the touch?

Great leaders … are people with enormous Great leaders … are people with enormous self-knowledge. They have self-insight and self-knowledge. They have self-insight and

self-respect balanced by scepticism … self-respect balanced by scepticism … sceptics who understand their own masks sceptics who understand their own masks

as well as the masks of life, and this as well as the masks of life, and this understanding makes them humble. They understanding makes them humble. They see the humanity in others and deal with see the humanity in others and deal with them in compassionate yet realistic ways. them in compassionate yet realistic ways.

This duality makes for a wonderful leader.This duality makes for a wonderful leader.

(McKee, 2003)

Really believe in your heart of Really believe in your heart of hearts that your fundamental hearts that your fundamental

purpose, the reason for purpose, the reason for being, is to enlarge the being, is to enlarge the

lives of others.lives of others.

Your life will be enlarged also. Your life will be enlarged also. And all of the other things we And all of the other things we have been taught to concentrate have been taught to concentrate

on will take care of themselves. on will take care of themselves.

Emotionally intelligent leaders look out of the window to apportion credit - they

acknowledge colleagues, and admit to a fair dose of good luck. But they look in the mirror to assign responsibility - they never

blame outside events when things go wrong.

In contrast, less emotionally intelligent leaders tend to do the opposite - they look out of the

window for factors to blame, but they gaze in the mirror to credit themselves when things go well.

Which one Which one

are you?are you?

Thank You

DiolchWebsite: www.ctrtraining.co.uk

http://www.ctrtraining.co.uk/resources.php

Emotional Intelligence sets apart good leaders - an introductory workshop Ian Govier (Facilitator)

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