Elements of E-mail
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Elements ofe-mail
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scrivere mail efficaci in inglese
Business English:
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introduction
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assets!
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immediate
[ + ]
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simple
[ + ]
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direct
[ + ]
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borderless
[ + ]
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but
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spam
[ - ]
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& viruses, malware, phishing, etc
[ - ]
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> eroded trust
[ - ]
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information overload
[ - ]
n orma on over oa
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n orma on over oainformation overload
information overload
information overloadinformation overload
information overload
information overloadinformation overload
information overload
information overload
information overload
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?
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invest in trust
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cut information overload
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subject linepresentation
style & tone
content
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subject line
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be precise
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be precise
HELLO
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be precise
Re:
b
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be precise
b i
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be precise
Our meeting
b i
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be precise
Request
b i
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be precise
Appointment
b i
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be precise
Our appointment
be precise
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be precise
Our appointment tomorrow
be precise
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be precise
Our appointment tomorrow (Thursday 3 D
be precise
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be precise
Our appointment for Thurs 3 Dec
be precise
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be precise
Reschedule our appointment for Thurs 3 D
be precise
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be precise
Your order
be precise
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be precise
Your order Number 76r48598t6
be precise
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be precise
Your order with NOSTRA SOC. - Number 76
be precise
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be precise
Your order of 15 November 2009 with NOS
be precise
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be precise
Delivery of your order of 15 November 200
be precise
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be precise
Your order
+ Number 76r48598t6
+ 15 November 2009+ NOSTRA SOC.
+ Delivery
WHAT
+ which (exactly
+ and when+ with whom
+ what action
>
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>
increased trust
but also
increased information overload
be brief
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be brief
be brief
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be brief
Delivery of your order of 15 November 200
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be brief
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be brief
Delivery of your order of 15 November 200
be brief
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Delivery ofyour order of 15November 2009with NOSTRA
SOC. - Number 76r48598t6
be brief
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Delivery of order of 15 November2009 - Number 76r48598t6
be brief
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Delivery of order of 15 Nov 09:n 76r48598t6
be brief
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Delivery of your order of 15 November 200
Delivery of order of 15 Nov 09: n 76r4859
be ordered
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be ordered
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Delivery of order of 15 Nov 09: n 76r4859
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be ordered
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delivery 4
order 1
15 Nov 09 3
76r48598t6 2
be ordered
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delivery 4
76r48598t6 2
15 Nov 09 3
order 1
be ordered
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order 1
76r48598t6 2
15 Nov 09 3
delivery 4
be ordered
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Order n 76r48598t6 of 15 Nov 09: Deliver
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subject line/
presentation
style & tone
content
presentation
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p
salutations
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you dont knowthe addressees nam
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Dear Sir or Madam
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam leo
lacus, ultrices quis, volutpat ut massa.
Yours faithfully
John Smith
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you knowthe addresseesname
(i) formal or neutral
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DearMr Brown
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam leo
lacus, ultrices quis, volutpat ut massa.
Yours sincerely
John Smith
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DearMs Jones
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam leo
lacus, ultrices quis, volutpat ut massa.
Yours sincerely
John Smith
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DearMs Catherine Jones
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam leo
lacus, ultrices quis, volutpat ut massa.
Yours sincerely
John Smith
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you knowthe addresseesname
(ii) informal
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Dear Catherine
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam leo
lacus, ultrices quis, volutpat ut massa.
Regards
John
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Hi Cathy
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam leo
lacus, ultrices quis, volutpat ut massa.
Best
John
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Dear Catherine
Hi CathyHello Cathy
Cathy
Hey CATH!
Yo
Sincerely yours
Best regardsBest wishes
Cordially
Regards
As everYours
Best
Love
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you are writing to agroup
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Dear Colleagues /Subscribers / Friends
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam leo
lacus, ultrices quis, volutpat ut massa.
Yours
John
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Dear All / Everyone
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam leo
lacus, ultrices quis, volutpat ut massa.
Yours
John
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Greetings
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam leo
lacus, ultrices quis, volutpat ut massa.
Yours
John
e-mail is not:
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avoid e.g.
expanded forms I am / she is / we do no
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missing letters mssng lttrs
IM abbreviations l8r / imho / fwiw
spelling errors raccomandation
no caps im italian
careless punctuation sentence end .start of n
unfinished sentences to be or not to ...
bad grammar he have two thing too d
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use: correct spelling
standard punctuation
standard capitalisation
correct grammar
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& use contractions:
Im/ shed/ theyve
thats/ whos/ wheres
isnt/ hasnt/ wont etc.
layout & format
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Dear Catherine
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmodtempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut
aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in
voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint
occaecat cupidatat non proident.
Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem accusantium
doloremque laudantium, totam rem aperiam.
Eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis.
Regards
John
plain text
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Dear Catherine
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmodtempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut
aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in
voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint
occaecat cupidatat non proident.
Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem accusantium
doloremque laudantium, totam rem aperiam.
Eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis.
Regards
John
aligned left
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Dear Catherine
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmodtempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut
aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in
voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint
occaecat cupidatat non proident.
Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem accusantium
doloremque laudantium, totam rem aperiam.
Eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis.
Regards
John
space between paragraphs
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Dear Catherine
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmodtempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut
aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in
voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint
occaecat cupidatat non proident.
Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem accusantium
doloremque laudantium, totam rem aperiam.
Eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis.
Regards
John
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subject line
presentation/style & tone
content
style & tone
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I am in grande gratitudine for the massive andimportante bundle of silk, which will bring lacrim
allegre to the eyes of molte bellissime signore Flo
Thank you for the consignment of fabric. It is up
your usual standard.
Caro Signor Keegan,
most respected and famoso mercante di Manchester.
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most respected and famoso mercante di Manchester.
Dear Sir
I am in grande gratitudine for the massive andimportante bundle of silk, which will bring lacrime
allegre to the eyes of molte bellissime signore Florentine
Thank you for the consignment of fabric. It is up to
your usual standard.
Please accept, signore, my most humble complimentsand sincerissimi good wishes.
Yours sincerely
direct English is good style
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simple words
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Short words are the best
and old words when short are best of a
Winston Chur
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help
assistance
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so
consequently
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if
provided that
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take part
participate
verbosity in prepositions
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to
for the purpose of
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if
in case
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after
subsequent to
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for
in favour of
short sentences
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% of people95%
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7-10 words in sentence
p p
who willunderstand
on first
reading
% of people75%
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in sentence15-20 words
p p
who willunderstand
on first
reading
% of people4%
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in sentence27+ words
p p
who willunderstand
on first
reading
few paragraphs
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Dear Catherine
max 4 paragraphs
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Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmod
tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut
aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in
voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint
occaecat cupidatat non proident.
Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem accusantium
doloremque laudantium, totam rem aperiam.
Eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis.
Regards
John
1
2
3
4
Dear Catherine
max 4 lines per paragraph
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{
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmod
tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut
aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in
voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint
occaecat cupidatat non proident.
Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem accusantium
doloremque laudantium, totam rem aperiam.
Eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis.
Regards
John
2 {
{
{
4
2
1
Dear Catherine
but avoid 1 line 1 sentence paras
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Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi.
Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error.
Eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis.
Regards
John
Dear Catherine
need more text?
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Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmod
tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut
aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in
voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint
occaecat cupidatat non proident.
Typi non habent claritatem insitam; est usus legentis in iis qui facit eorum
claritatem. Investigationes demonstraverunt lectores legere me lius quod ii
legunt saepius. Claritas est etiam processus dynamicus, qui sequitur
mutationem consuetudium lectorum. Mirum est notare quam littera gothica,
quam nunc putamus parum claram, anteposuerit litterarum formas
humanitatis per seacula quarta decima et quinta decima. Eodem modo typi,
qui nunc nobis videntur parum clari, fiant sollemnes in futurum.
Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem accusantium
Please see attached
> use an attachment
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John Smith bros.
23 High Street
Exampton
PS1 2TO
UK
Tel./Fax: +44 5678910
Cell: +44 789101234567
. .
e-mail
To: Catherine Jones ([email protected])
From: John Smith ([email protected])
Date: 2 December 2009
Dear Catherine
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Vestibulum porta gravida mauris, ut sollicitudin
nunc adipiscing viverra. Curabitur sed mi nunc. Cras ac felis ligula.
Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia nostra, per inceptos himenaeos. Lorem ipsum
dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam elementum sem quis quam tincidunt eget vulputate ligula
tempor. Integer tempus adipiscing lectus, in venenatis metus ornare at. Praesent et leo arcu. Aliquam
erat volutpat. Phasellus non erat ac purus ullamcorper egestas. Aenean lacus augue, condimentum eget
ultrices vel, commodo quis libero. Etiam sed diam vel elit viverra dignissim. Ut a lectus eget arcu eleifend
elementum. Vivamus non tellus eu nisl aliquam lobortis at in libero.
Pellentesque porttitor egestas leo, ut posuere sem lobortis sed. Maecenas at mollis nunc. Morbi tristique,
purus vel tristique gravida, neque ligula sollicitudin sem, consequat facilisis orci arcu eget ipsum. Morbi
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subject line
presentationstyle & tone/
content
content
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a sentence is a unit ofthought
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a paragraph is athematic unit
1st paragraph
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- why you are writing
- what you want
Dear Saddam
Ive asked the UN to send some weapons inspectors. Please
show them all your secret places.
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NOTHING ELSE!
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2nd paragraph
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details
explanationinfo
Dear Saddam
Ive asked the UN to send some weapons inspectors. Please
show them all your secret places.
There are 40 scientists. All are experts in biological
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p g
weapons; none are US spies. The leader is called Hans BlixHansll approach you if he has any needs. Theyll arrive atyour offices at 6am tomorrow morning.
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think about what your corresponden
really needs to know
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dont give too little info
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dont give superfluous info
3rd paragraph
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what you want, expanded
Dear Saddam
Ive asked the UN to send some weapons inspectors. Please
show them all your secret places.
There are 40 scientists. All are experts in biological
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weapons; none are US spies. The leader is called Hans BlixHansll approach you if he has any needs. Theyll arrive atyour offices at 6am tomorrow morning.
Please let them into your secret places, introduce them tothe people on your weapons program. Especially, theyll
want to see your WMD dumps.
4th paragraph
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close
Dear Saddam
Ive asked the UN to send some weapons inspectors. Please
show them all your secret places.
There are 40 scientists. All are experts in biological
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weapons; none are US spies. The leader is called Hans BlixHansll approach you if he has any needs. Theyll arrive atyour offices at 6am tomorrow morning.
Please let them into your secret places, introduce them tothe people on your weapons program. Especially, theyll
want to see your WMD dumps.
Sorry this e-mail is a bit late. My father sends his regards.
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apologies go here
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and social glue
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subject line
presentationstyle & tone
content/
conclusions
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be human
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make it easy for your corresponden
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use friendly language
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use just enough stuff
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use just enough words
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use just enough ideas
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use just enough info
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p.s.
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http://davidnicholson.posterous.com
some stuff we didnt have time for
http://davidnicholson.posterous.com/http://davidnicholson.posterous.com/ -
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initiative by:
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AlfaBeta
1Click2TrainWorking Communication
contact:
http://www.abtsi.com/en/http://www.workcomm.it/http://www.workcomm.it/http://www.oneclicktotrain.com/http://www.oneclicktotrain.com/http://www.abtsi.com/en/http://www.abtsi.com/en/ -
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www.davidnicholson.it
mailto:[email protected]://www.davidnicholson.it/http://www.davidnicholson.it/mailto:[email protected]:[email protected]