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Screen Shot 20151101 at 9.38.48 PM Edgar Allan Poe Had a Time Machine and I Can Prove It historybuff.com Jake Offenhartz I’m pretty positive that Edgar Allan Poe had (has?) the power to travel through time. Hear me out on this one. It’s not just the wellknown circumstances of his life— orphaned at birth, father of the mystery novel, master of cryptology, maestro of the macabre. Nor am I referring to the headscratching details of his death, how he was found in a gutter wearing someone else’s clothes, babbling incoherently about an unidentified man named “Reynolds.” And I won’t even get into the confounding reports of a nameless figure who, for seven decades, would show up to Poe’s gravesite on the early hours of his birthday, dressed in black with a glass of cognac and three roses. Curious and tragic, yes, but hardly evidence that the acclaimed horror writer could transcend the limits of space and time. No, my time travel theory concerns the author’s creative output, which you’ll soon see, is so flukishly prophetic as to make my outlandish claim seem plausible —nay, probable! The proof is in the pudding, and the pudding is a loosely linked map of flesheating floaters, crunched skullsurvivors, and primordial particles. OK, here we go… Exhibit A: The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym of Nantucket Written in 1837, Poe’s only completed novel details a mutiny on a whaling ship lost at sea. Out of supplies, the men revert to cannibalism, drawing straws to elect a sacrifice. A boy named Richard Parker draws the shortest straw and is subsequently eaten. Now here’s where it gets weird(er): In 1884, fortysix years later after the novel’s publication, four men would be set adrift following the sinking of their yacht. Shipwrecked and without food, they too would go the survival cannibalism route, electing to kill and eat a 17yearold cabin boy. The boy’s name: Richard Parker. The extraordinary parallel went unnoticed for nearly a century, until a widelycirculated letter from a descendant of the real Parker outlined the similarities between the novel’s scene and the actual event. The letter was selected for publication in The Sunday Times

Transcript of Edgar Allan Poe Had a Time Machine and | HistoryBuff | The … · Edgar Allan Poe Had a Time...

Page 1: Edgar Allan Poe Had a Time Machine and | HistoryBuff | The … · Edgar Allan Poe Had a Time Machine and I Can Prove It historybuff.com Jake Offenhartz I’m pretty positive that

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Edgar Allan Poe Had a Time Machine and I Can Prove It historybuff.com

Jake Offenhartz

I’m pretty positive that Edgar AllanPoe had (has?) the power totravel through time. Hear me outon this one.

It’s not just the well­knowncircumstances of his life—orphaned at birth, father of themystery novel, master ofcryptology, maestro of themacabre. Nor am I referring to the

head­scratching details of his death, how he was found in a gutter wearing someone else’sclothes, babbling incoherently about an unidentified man named “Reynolds.” And I won’t evenget into the confounding reports of a nameless figure who, for seven decades, would show upto Poe’s gravesite on the early hours of his birthday, dressed in black with a glass of cognacand three roses.

Curious and tragic, yes, but hardly evidence that the acclaimed horror writer could transcendthe limits of space and time. No, my time travel theory concerns the author’s creative output,which you’ll soon see, is so flukishly prophetic as to make my outlandish claim seem plausible—nay, probable!

The proof is in the pudding, and the pudding is a loosely linked map of flesh­eating floaters,crunched skull­survivors, and primordial particles. OK, here we go…

Exhibit A: The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym of Nantucket

Written in 1837, Poe’s only completed novel details a mutiny on awhaling ship lost at sea. Out of supplies, the men revert tocannibalism, drawing straws to elect a sacrifice. A boy namedRichard Parker draws the shortest straw and is subsequently eaten.

Now here’s where it gets weird(er): In 1884, forty­six years laterafter the novel’s publication, four men would be set adrift followingthe sinking of their yacht. Shipwrecked and without food, they toowould go the survival cannibalism route, electing to kill and eat a17­year­old cabin boy. The boy’s name: Richard Parker.

The extraordinary parallel went unnoticed for nearly a century, untila widely­circulated letter from a descendant of the real Parkeroutlined the similarities between the novel’s scene and the actualevent. The letter was selected for publication in The Sunday Times

Page 2: Edgar Allan Poe Had a Time Machine and | HistoryBuff | The … · Edgar Allan Poe Had a Time Machine and I Can Prove It historybuff.com Jake Offenhartz I’m pretty positive that

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after the journalist Arthur Koestler put out a call for tales of “striking coincidence.” Strikingindeed…

Exhibit B: “The Businessman”

In 1848, a railroad worker named Phineas Gage suffered atraumatic brain injury after taking an iron spike through theskull. Somehow he survived, though his personality wouldchange drastically. These behavioral changes were closelystudied, allowing the medical community to develop the firstunderstanding of the role played by the frontal lobe on socialcognition.

Except for Poe, who’d inexplicably understood the profoundpersonality changes caused by frontal lobe syndrome for nearlya decade.  In 1840, he penned a characteristically gruesomestory called “The Businessman” about an unnamed narratorwho suffers a traumatic head injury as a young boy, leading toa life of obsessive regularity and violent, sociopathic outbursts.

Poe’s grasp of frontal lobe syndrome is so precise that neurologist Eric Altshuler writes,“There’s a dozen symptoms and he knows every single one…There’s everything in that story,we’ve hardly learned anything more.” Altshuler, who, to reiterate, is a medically­licensedneurologist and not at all a crackpot, goes on to say, “It’s so exact that it’s just weird, it’s likehe had a time machine.”

Exhibit C: Eureka

Still unconvinced? What if I told youthat Poe predicted the origins of theuniverse eighty years beforemodern science would begin toformulate the Big Bang theory?Surely, an amateur stargazer withno formal training in cosmologycould not accurately describe themachinery of the universe, rejectingwidely­held inaccuracies whilesolving a theoretical paradox thathad bewildered astronomers sinceKepler. Except that’s exactly whathe happened.

The prophetic vision came in the form of Eureka, a 150­page prose poem critically panned forits complexity and regarded by many as the work of a madman. Written in the final year of theauthor’s life, Eureka describes an expanding universe that began in “one instantaneous flash”derived from a single “primordial particle.”

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Poe goes on to put forth the first legitimate solution Olber’s paradox—the question of why,given the vast number of stars in the universe, the night sky is dark—by explaining that lightfrom the expanding universe had not yet reached our solar system. When Edward RobertHarrison published Darkness at Night in 1987, he credited Eureka as having anticipated hisfindings.

In an interview with Nautilus, Italian astronomer Alberto Cappi speaks of Poe’s prescience,admitting, “It’s surprising that Poe arrived at his dynamically evolving universe, because therewas no observational or theoretical evidence suggesting such a possibility. No astronomer inPoe’s day could imagine a non­static universe.”

But what if Poe wasn’t of a day at all, but of of all the days? What if his written prophecies—onthe cannibalistic demise of Richard Parker, the symptoms of frontal lobe syndrome, and theBig Bang—were merely reportage from his journey through the extratemporal continuum?

Surely I sound like a tin­foil capped loon, but maybe, maybe, there are many more propheciesscattered throughout the author’s work, a possibility made all the more likely by the fact that,as The New York Times notes, “Poe was so undervalued for so long, there is not a lot of Poe­related material around.”

I’ll leave you with this quote, taken from a letter that Poe wrote to James Russell Lowell in1844, in which he apologizes for his absence and slothfulness:

I live continually in a reverie of the future. I have no faith in human perfectibility. Ithink that human exertion will have no appreciable effect upon humanity. Man isnow only more active — not more happy — nor more wise, than he was 6000years ago. The result will never vary — and to suppose that it will, is to supposethat the foregone man has lived in vain — that the foregone time is but therudiment of the future — that the myriads who have perished have not been uponequal footing with ourselves — nor are we with our posterity. I cannot agree tolose sight of man the individual, in man the mass…You speak of “an estimate ofmy life” — and, from what I have already said, you will see that I have none togive. I have been too deeply conscious of the mutability and evanescence oftemporal things, to give any continuous effort to anything — to be consistent inanything. My life has been whim — impulse — passion — a longing for solitude —a scorn of all things present, in an earnest desire for the future.

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