SPRING 2013

For people with intellectual and developmental disabilities

DFRC and The Arc of Delaware — an enduring partnership that benefits all withintellectual and developmental disabilities in Delaware

Delaware’s first ever Statewide Self-AdvocacyConference

On Saturday, March 23, 2013, more than onehundred self-advocates and their friends gathered atthe Dover Sheraton for a day of education, sharingand celebration centered on the theme “Speak fromthe Heart….It’s Your Life” which was coined byWilmington self-advocate Robert Edelsohn. Theconference was organized by a committee ofdedicated self-advocates who chose the theme, thevenue and the speakers, as well as taking care of allthe many and complex details involved in stagingan event of this magnitude. They received supportfrom their family members, as well as staff from TheArc, the Center for Disabilities Studies, theDevelopmental Disabilities Council and the Divisionof Developmental Disabilities Services. Break-outsessions included presentations on careers,transportation, emergency preparedness, fitness andnutrition, and finished with a group discussion ontopics of interest to those in attendance.

The excitement generated by the Self-AdvocacyConference guarantees that the growingunderstanding of the benefits of self-advocacy willcontinue to be explored and implemented by theSelf-Advocacy Coalition and Delaware People First.Delaware People First is a self-advocacy organizationrun by and for people with intellectual anddevelopmental disabilities that is supported by The Arc.

It is hoped that this event will become an annualconference for self-advocates and their supporters inDelaware. For more information about Self-Advocacy and Delaware People First, please contactSusannah Eaton-Ryan at seaton-ryan@arcde.orgor at 302-996-9400 x 113.

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DFRC was founded in 1956 “to support services and programs thatenrich the lives of Delawareans with intellectual and developmentaldisabilities.” DFRC’s generous support for almost 60 years has benefittedall of The Arc of Delaware’s programs and made an immense impact onthe individuals we serve. Currently, DFRC supports The Arc’s CaseManagement and Outreach programs, as well as Group HomeMonitoring and the Necessity of Life Fund. In fact, DFRC has supportedNecessity of Life since its inception in 1992, recognizing the importanceof ensuring that individuals have those essentials necessary to maintaintheir dignity and improve the quality of their lives. And that is what DFRCasks of The Arc — make life better for those served and change their livesin ways that are positive, meaningful and demonstrable. This supportiveand intertwined partnership is described best by Becky Hill who servesboth on The Arc’s Board, and DFRC’s Beneficiaries Committee:

“I think DFRC and The Arc of Delaware are an excellent match. Both arerespected organizations which have existed in our state for over 50 years.Both groups care deeply about the intellectual and developmental disabilitycommunity and work tirelessly to provide opportunities on behalf of theseindividuals. The Arc's programs meet the goals established by DFRC. And thebest part — it is a Win-Win situation for the children and adults served.”

Tony Glenn, DFRC’s Executive Director, is well known in Delaware notonly for his tireless work to support the intellectual and developmentaldisabilities community by raising hundreds of thousands of dollars eachyear, but also as a former football coach and for his presence at theannual Blue/Gold Game. Tony views the partnership between The Arcand DFRC in the following warm and generous terms:

“The Arc of Delaware is one of the oldest and most treasured partners ofthe DFRC family. Personally, I cannot imagine our state without the dedicatedand compassionate staff and volunteers comprising The Arc family. Ifsomeone were to focus on all that takes place within the course of even onesingle day, it would boggle the mind to try to comprehend the high level oflove and goodness that is shared by the people who live the mission of TheArc. The positive impact made by The Arc on the entire state of Delaware isimmeasurable, and we all need to take time to be grateful for all the years ofservice provided for so many. I have always been deeply inspired by the great

work of The Arc of Delaware.”We thank DFRC for their ongoing

support of the mission of The Arc of Delaware.

2 For people with intellectual

As we all recognize, each person is unique untothemselves. This is certainly true for all persons withintellectual or developmental disabilities (I/DD). Theseindividuals can have a very broad range of gifts, skills andtalents. On the other hand, these persons have a diversevariety of life challenges. More specifically, some persons withI/DD have great skills with respect to their ability to expressthemselves, their choices and their interests. Other personswith I/DD may be mostly or totally nonverbal. This createsgreat challenges both for these individuals… and for each ofus who has an interest, commitment or obligation to supportand empower them.

Of course the less verbal a person is, the more challengesthe individual will face in making choices and making theirneeds and desires known. While it may be tempting tobelieve that persons who are totally nonverbal may be totallyunable to make choices or advocate for themselves, thissimply is not true.

Every parent and every professional who is successful insupporting a verbally challenged person with I/DD, haslearned to recognize the choices, preferences, likes anddislikes of these individuals. More importantly, every time oneof these family members or support professionals is able torecognize and honor the choice of a person with I/DD theyhave in fact empowered that individual to take more controlof their own life. I believe they have also effectively advocatedfor that person.

Each person learns from their life experiences, parents,teachers and others to make choices. As they do so, it iscritical that they are also being taught bysocial/cultural experience, shared values,religious/spiritual indoctrination, mentoring andexample to recognize the responsibilities (tothemselves and others) which go hand-in-hand with every right, and everychoice. Informed choice is a veryexplicit concept and essential tothe empowerment and personalgrowth of all persons.“Choice” in the absence ofinformation andresponsibility can be, andoften is, a recipe forirresponsible behavior.Additionally, uninformedor irresponsible choicescan in some cases be

extremely detrimental both to the person choosing and toothers who share their life space. Positive influence fromothers is a fundamental ingredient in the process for allpersons learning to make informed choices.

The life journey for each of us is a continuous growthprocess of learning from experiences, gaining knowledge andnew skills; and the parallel process of making more informed,responsible and self-directed decisions about our lives as theseabilities increase. A true advocate is someone who recognizesand supports (an)other person(s) on this very personal path. Ibelieve a self-advocate is any person who is involved inchoosing and pursuing their own path. Ultimately, for thoseself-advocates who are interested, they may also support andpromote the rights and choices of other persons who sharetheir challenges.

I invite you to contact me at tolson@arcde.org or 302-996-9400 x 110 if you would like to discuss choices, rightsand advocacy and how these issues impact the quality of lifefor all of us – including persons with I/DD. We will continueto explore these themes in the next issue of the newsletter.

Choice, Empowerment and Advocacy • Part I of II

SPRING 2013

3and developmental disabilities

The Arc of Delaware is generously supported by the following corporations andagencies who have recently given gifts:Bank of America $30,000 in support of the Employment Program

Chimes Foundation $5,000 for group home renovations

Christmas Shop Foundation $500 equipment grant

Delaware Development Disabilities Council $25,000 in support of Self-Advocacy

DFRC $22,400 – in support of Case Management, Group Home Monitoring and the Necessity of Life Fund

Discover Bank $6,800 for group home renovations

Grant-In-Aid $12,730 to support Case Management

We thank the above funders who partner with The Arc of Delaware to ensure that Delawareans with intellectual anddevelopmental disabilities are provided with opportunities for enriched lives in the community. We could not do our workwithout their help.

Homes For Life Foundation $51,000 for group home renovations

JPMorgan Chase $25,000 in support of the Housing Options and Employment Programs

Palmer Foundation $6,000 in support of seniors living in Kent County

Sussex County Council $1,000 in support of Delaware People First

United Way of Delaware $66,385 in support of all Arc

programs in Delaware

Welfare Foundation $50,000 for group home renovations

April is Autism Awareness MonthThis month, we invite you to join us in raising awareness about what autism really means. If you are not

already familiar with Autism NOW, The National Autism Resource & Information Center, visitwww.autismnow.org for a wealth of high-quality, reliable information designed specifically for individuals on

the autism spectrum or with other developmental disabilities, their families and others who care aboutthem. Autism NOW is a project of The Arc of the United States funded in part by the Administration on

Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities.You can find links to Autism NOW’s social media channels on www. autismnow.org and

you can follow The Arc nationally at www.thearc.org.New data released by the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that 1 in 50

children are now on the Autism Spectrum, a revision of the previous number of 1 in 88 as reportedin March 2012.

For people with intellectual

Buena Vista EventOn September 15, 2012, The Arc of

Delaware hosted an evening event atBuena Vista to welcome Terry Olson asthe recently appointed ExecutiveDirector, and several new members tothe Board of Directors. The event alsoserved to introduce them to ourfunders, service providers and partners.It was a beautiful evening and ourmany guests, including Governor JackMarkell and newly elected New CastleCounty Executive Tom Gordon,enjoyed strolling through the lovely oldhouse and the lovingly maintainedgrounds. Many of the guests lingeredon the patio as the sun set over

autumnal fields to enjoy spendingtime with old and new friends.

We would like to thank MooreBrothers Wine Company for theirgenerous donation of wines to thisevent.

The Arc of Delaware is markingits 60th year as an advocacyorganization in 2013 and plans arebeing made for an event tocelebrate. All our many members andfriends will be invited and we lookforward to sharing this festive occasionwith you.

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Ursuline Gift Drive and PartyFor many years, the girls of Ursuline Academy in Wilmington

have collected Christmas gifts for residents of group homeswho would not otherwise receive presents during the holidayseason. The gift drive culminates in a party at the school towhich Santa Claus pays a visit, Christmas songs and carols aresung and the gifts are distributed to the guests. It is always adelightful event that truly signifies the real meaning of theseason: warmth; kindness; generosity; outreach to those lessfortunate. On December 11, 2012, more than 100 individualsgathered at the school for an afternoon of fun, friendship andcelebration. It was a joy to watch the girls greet their visitors,and make sure they all felt welcomed and comfortable. Thesmiles on the faces of those who were invited conveyed theirdelight at being included and celebrated. Many of the guestssang along with the girls and several of them did solorenditions of their favorite songs. Heather Blakiston of CSI saidof the afternoon:

“As always, the party was a beautiful event andwell organized. We had one individual there whowas dancing and singing with the chorus almostthe entire time. This is an individual who is VERYquiet and not overly social. It was a PLEASURE tosee him enjoying himself as much as he did! All ofthe students and staff were very attentive andinteractive which makes it very enjoyable foreveryone.”

We extend our sincere thanks to the students ofUrsuline Academy, and to the staff, particularlymath teacher Holly Tattersall, who worked veryhard to coordinate the gift drive and the party.

UPCOMING EVENTSApril 19 Spring Fling Dance at Cheswold Fire Hall, 7 – 9 p.m.

April 20 Mid-Del Run/Walk/Roll at Wild Quail, registration begins at 8 a.m., run at 9 a.m.

May 17 Cinco de Mayo Dance at Cheswold Fire Hall, 7 – 9 p.m.

August 5 Golf Tournament and Silent Auction at Hartefeld National Golf Course

2013 is the 60th Anniversary of The Arc of Delaware – watch this space for more information!

SPRING 2013

and developmental disabilities

New Sunroom at Chapel HillThe Arc of Delaware partners with Chimes to serve 52 individuals in 13 of our

community based group homes. In 2012, this partnership expanded when the ChimesFoundation contributed $5,000to help renovate the sunroomof the Chapel Hill home inNewark. The ladies who live atChapel Hill have done so for

many years and are verycomfortable in their home. They

particularly enjoy sitting in the sunroom to look out overtheir garden in the evening. However, their enjoyment of thesunroom was being curtailed because extensive and expensiverenovations were needed. The Chimes Foundation generouslycontributed $5,000 towards the overall costs of $19,000. Thework was finished in December and the sunroom looks betterthan ever. We thank Pete Dakunchak and all our friends at Chimesfor investing in the well-being of the residents and for helping TheArc ensure that the ladies have an attractive, safe and accessiblearea in which to relax.

love. As those who knew them, worked with them and lovedthem realized, on that level of grace, they were not in anyway disabled. Rather, we were the beneficiaries of their fargreater patience as we learned from them lessons that we willnever forget, of courage and kindness, perseverance andpersistence. And that action is indeed eloquence.”

Arc staff member Mary Beth Limmina, who worked withboth Brenda and Matt at Bank of America, remembers themboth in the following manner:

“Brenda and Matt set an example for all individuals withdisabilities to follow. They fought for the rights that everyoneis entitled to, whether they have disabilities or not. Togetherthey built lives for themselves that resembled the lives of theirnon-disabled family members and friends and they worked tosecure the same rights and benefits for all of the individualswith disabilities whose paths they crossed. Brenda’s workteam sincerely misses her gentle spirit and kind, nurturingmanner. Matt is missed for his ability to foster camaraderieamong his teammates while ALWAYS having a smile on hisface. They leave a void in Support Services at Bank of Americathat may never be filled.”

We extend our sincere sympathies to their families.

On Monday, November 19,2012, the intellectual anddevelopmental disabilitiescommunity in Delaware wasdevastated to hear of the lossof Brenda and Matt Petke in acar accident the previous

evening. Brenda and Matt, who had married in 2001,were adevoted couple and dedicated advocates. Their loss will be feltfor many years to come.

Brenda and Matt had many ties to The Arc of Delaware andboth served on the Board of Directors. They met and fell in lovewhile serving as the President and Vice-President of DelawarePeople First, a self-advocacy organization run by and for peoplewith intellectual and developmental disabilities that is supportedby The Arc.

Micki Edelsohn gave a deeply felt eulogy at their funeralservice on December 1, 2012. The following is an excerpt:

“In a world where the truth can often seem a complicatedmatter, and there’s a lot of talk about what we SHOULD do,Brenda and Matt lived the elegant simplicity of just doinggood, for goodness sake. Straight from their heart, just out of

In Memory of Brenda and Matt Petke

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before

after

6 For people with intellectual

Mary HornThe Arc of Delaware Loses Valued Mid-Del Committee Member and Advocate

For more than four decades, Mary Horn gave ofherself as the Office Manager for the Mid-DelCommittee of The Arc of Delaware. She coordinatedand organized activities, resources and recreation forindividuals with special needs and their families.

Mary found her way to The Arc after a casualcomment was made at her bridge club that Mid-Delneeded a part-time office manager. Little did Maryknow then that by accepting this position that shewould graciously serve persons with intellectual anddevelopmental disabilities for more than 40 years.

The Arc was fortunate to have Mary as a calm andthoughtful team member who practiced genuinecharity to improve the lives of others. She createdand coordinated recreational activities and kept Mid-Del members informed about upcoming events.Included were scholarships to local summer camps,as well as bowling, swimming, scouting, and SundaySchool. Mary was a avid supporter of The Arc’sgroup home monitoring program and wanted toensure that all homes are comfortable, safe and wellmaintained for the residents. She frequently attendedMid-Del’s monthly dances that continue to beextremely popular.

Mary was a dedicated wife, mother, andgrandmother who easily connected with people. Sheunderstood their need for human kindness andworked diligently for her family and her community.Her focus toward those individuals with intellectualand developmental disabilities continued with hermembership and support of the Auxiliary of theStockley Center. She served as secretary to thisorganization and raised funds to improve livingconditions at the facility.

Mary Horn died on February 4, 2013, but herservice lives on. We thank her loving family forsharing this remarkable woman with us. She was adedicated advocate for those with intellectual anddevelopmental disabilities and her power of caringand her charitable words enhanced the lives ofmany. Mary actively lived The Arc’s mission and willbe truly missed by her Arc family.

— Marge Locke

Annual Mid-Del Picnic at Killens Pond

September 15, 2012 was a cool and crisp Saturday, the perfect dayto hold The Arc of Delaware’s Mid-Del Committee’s annual picnic atKillens Pond.

Not a seat was left in the pavilion, there was a record crowd! Hamburgers, hotdogs, and fried chicken were on the menu, as well

as a multitude of wonderful side dishes and desserts. Many guestscame from group homes to join in the fun, others from their familyhomes. After enjoying the delicious food, Brian Jordan provided music,and the annual dance contest commenced. Games were also playedand the winners were happy to receive Arc sports bottles and tee-shirts.

The heart of The Arc’s Mid-Del Committee is its volunteers and theywere out in full force for this event. They cooked burgers and dogs,served on the food line, and visited with the individuals who came outto enjoy a beautiful day with their friends.

Mid-Del’s Christmas DanceOn December 14, 2012, the

Cheswold Fire Hall was festivelydecorated for the holiday season asmore than 300 participants from acrossthe state eagerly arrived for Mid-Del’sannual Christmas Dance. The sounds ofDJ Jay Pappas soon filled the room asmany took to the dance floor.Meanwhile, Santa’s elves, (aka parentsand caregivers) bustled about thekitchen, cutting pizza, pouringbeverages and plating other goodies they’d donated for everyone’sdelight. Of course, the highlight of the evening was the appearance ofthe jolly old man himself, otherwise known as Paul Parton. A linequickly formed for the chance to sit on Santa’s knee and confideChristmas wishes; some came with their handwritten letters. Thanks

to a sizeabledonation from theLadies of theEastern Star,Morning StarChapter #7 Smyrna,Santa presentedthose in attendancewith a special treat.Needless to say, awonderful eveningwas enjoyed by all.

7and developmental disabilities

SPRING 2013

20th Annual Golf TournamentSHIRT SPONSORMobac, Inc.

CART SPONSORFalcon Safety Products, Inc.

CORPORATE SPONSORABCO Refrigeration Supply Corp.Chesapeake Insurance AdvisorsChristiana Health CarePat and John CochranCoventry Health CareCrowley AssociationsDuPont CompanyGeorge H. Burns, Inc.Micro Care Corp.Ohana CompaniesSantora CPA GroupWSFS Bank

HOLE SPONSORBramhall Hitchen InsuranceDiversified CPCMicki and Lanny EdelsohnIntellitec Solutions, LLCMatheson Tri-GasPersia Carpet

CONTEST SPONSORAbove & BeyondAeropres Corp.Anatoly’s Landscaping, Inc.Budget RooterGive Me ShelterHighmark Blue Cross Blue Shield DEJoseph LabovskyMeier Supply, Inc.Mullin AppraisalPatricia M. Heather

DONORSThe Arc Employment ProgramRuth and Brooks BantaB. BrittinghamsBoulden PropaneTim BrooksDouble E Lawn CareHeath KahrsHenlopen ApplianceLighthouse PlumbingLouie’s PizzaBob OsgoodWilmington Glass Company

Elena Delle Donne & Tubby Raymond

With blue skies and warm temperatures, The Arc ofDelaware held its 20th Annual Golf Tournament and SilentAuction on August 6, 2012, at the Hartefeld National GolfCourse in Avondale, Pennsylvania. Thanks to the GolfCommittee, led by Doug Johnston, we had anothersuccessful event netting over $42,000. After a magnificentday on the course, golfers and friends of The Arc enjoyed anexceptional dinner followed by the presentation of awardsand a live and silent auction with over 150 items donated bylocal businesses and friends of The Arc of Delaware.

We were honored, once again, to have Tubby Raymond,University of Delaware and College Football Hall of Famegreat, as our Celebrity Host. As our dinner guest, we weredelighted to welcome Elena Delle Donne, University ofDelaware’s first team All-American women’s basketball player,who gave a very inspiring talk during dinner.

We want to thank all of the golfers and our friends whogenerously participated in the event, as well as our manysponsors, contributors and volunteers for another greattournament! Without their support, this successful eventwould not be possible!

Profile of a VolunteerDouglas E. Johnston has been an active volunteer with

The Arc of Delaware for approximately 16 years. He has heldvarious leadership positions including Executive Vice Presidentand Secretary of the Board.

Most importantly, Doug has served on The Arc ofDelaware’s Golf Committee since 2001. He has graciouslychaired the committee for the past ten years. Doug not onlyprovides the expertise on the game of golf, but also attractsmany of our sponsors and golfers. During his tenure on theGolf Committee, the tournament andsilent auction has netted morethan $443,000 to helpDelawareans with intellectualdisabilities access neededprograms and services toincrease their ability to live,work and socialize asindependently as possiblein the community.

Doug has donated literally hundreds of hours to The Arc ofDelaware, our Golf Tournament and the people we serveover these many years. Volunteering is also a family affair forDoug, his lovely wife Joanne, daughter Lindsay and sons Bradand Gregory. All of them are “hands on” regular volunteers atour Golf Tournament. Doug and his family prove every yearthat making huge difference in the lives of others can beincredibly fun for all involved.

2 S. Augustine StreetSuite BWilmington, DE 19804

NonprofitOrganizationU.S. Postage

PAIDPermit No. 51

Wilmington, DE

Micki Edelsohn in the NewsMicki Edelsohn, who has served for many years as a member of The Arc’s Board of Directors and on our

Housing Advisory and Finance Committees, received the Humanitarian award from the Delaware NAACP attheir 48th Freedom Fund Awards Banquet on November 2, 2012. This award recognized Micki’s astonishingabilities as a fundraiser who has raised millions of dollars to build 25 community group homes in Delaware,21 of which she deeded to The Arc.

In October, Micki was reappointed to the President’s Committee for People with Intellectual Disabilities(PCPID) for a second two year term.

We send our belated congratulations to Micki, and thank her for being the living embodiment of TheArc’s mission to improve the lives of those we support and their families.

Think Spring — A Time of Renewal

It’s official — spring has sprung! Days are decidedlylonger; grass is a little greener; trees are budding; andgardeners are planting seeds. Spring is, indeed, a timeof the earth’s renewal. It’s also a time to renew withThe Arc.

As the membership chair, I want to again personallythank our Life Members, as well as those of you whoeither joined or renewed in response to ourmembership drive letter. To those of you who havenot yet made the commitment, let spring be YOURtime to become a member. You may also ask a friendor a person with an intellectual or developmentaldisability, or their family to become members. Pleasejoin our family.

Joining is easy. You can do so on-line by going to TheArc of Delaware website at www.thearcofdelaware.org, or by calling State Headquarters at 302 996-9400,or the Dover office at 302 736-6140 to request amembership application.

The Arc needs you. Together, as membership seedsare planted, we can look forward to a bountiful harvestfor those individuals and their families that we serve.

— Merry Jones

Special Olympics DelawareNight of Heroes

On October 11, 2012, Delaware Special Olympics held theirNight of Heroes, a recognition program and celebration of thesport, spirit and splendor of Special Olympics. Our own MerryJones, Vice President of The Arc of Delaware’s Board and a Mid-DelCommittee member, received the Volunteer of the Year award.Merry is evidently as popular with Special Olympics as she is withThe Arc of Delaware, and she has given tirelessly of her time andtalent to both organizations. It was obvious by the deafeningapplause how appreciated Merry is by Special Olympics. TommyFields, a member of Delaware People First, received the Athlete ofthe Year award. Merry had the audience crying, while Tommy hadthem laughing with their acceptance speeches. Bill Monaghan,President of Delaware People First in New Castle County, did an excellent job of presenting awards, along with Alex Brathwaite, son of Cheryl Roach, who is also a member of The Arc’s Board.

This wonderful event was an opportunity to meet up with old friends and to show our appreciation for the commitment of Merry Jones, Special Olympics “Volunteer of the Year.”

State Headquarters T 302 996-9400 I F 302 996-06832 S. Augustine St., Suite B I Wilmington, DE 19804

Kent County T 302 736-6140 I F 302 736-0268P.O. Box 562 I Dover, DE 19903

TTY/TDD Relay 1 800 232-5460www.thearcofdelaware.org