Conflict Resolution Vally

8/4/2019 Conflict Resolution Vally

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Dont be afraid of opposition.

Remember, a kite rises against,

Not with, the wind.~Hamilton Mabie

CONFLICT IS GOOD


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Why Conflict is Important Keeps the organization vibrant

Status quo is insufficient

Can react to change Keeps group thinking for itself

Produces better solutions

Win-win solution

Guide team instead of micromanage

Increases the organizations ROI


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Conflict Resolution ProcessGuiding principles:

Must be constructive and with a plan to avoid getting

pulled into an argument Combined effort of people from differing experiences

produces better results

Must be open to others differences and opinions


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Set the Scene Environment

Audience/participants

Acknowledge the

conflict

If needed, take amoment to restore

emotional levels, thenregroup


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Gather Information

Active listening to others view

Restate

Paraphrase

Summarize

Identify issues clearly and concisely

Use I statements

Remain Flexible Clarify feelings


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Agree

Find a common perception of the problem

Understand the others point of view

Why they feel the way they do Needs, goals, interests can affect perception


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Brainstorm solutions

As a group

Generate fair input

Be open to all ideas Consider things you hadnt thought of before

Wait to discuss ideas until brainstorming is done toencourage participation


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Negotiate a Solution

Mutual solution may already be clear

If solution has not surfaced, seek resolution with a

win-win negotiation situation = what can we do so allparties walk away happy?


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Positive Conflict Helps people understand what others feel is

important to them

Clarifies and defines issues and values

Aids a team in knowing what is really important andbuilds a sense of mutual respect

Confrontation can lead to better ideas

Can be the start of defining adjusted or new roles and

goals which are more satisfactory to everyone


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Negative Conflict Interrupts normal relations between individuals

and teams

Provokes hurt

Causes loss of self-respect, or respect for others

Takes time and energy of everyone involved Causes confusion, insecurity, hostility, distrust,

alienation

Causes stress


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Perception: What Do You See?

Artist: W.E. Hill


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:Compromising

What Happens:

Negotiation with give and take of each party

Solution is somewhere in the middle

Appropriate to Use When: Individuals are committed to the process

Willing to give enough to make solution work

Confidence that a solution can be reached

Inappropriate to Use When: Individuals not willing to give in a little

Original positions are too far from the middle

Parties dont believe in negotiating


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Denial/Avoiding

What Happens: Nothing is said; no effort to talk Unsure of what to do Fearful of what might happen No commitment to improve the relationship

Appropriate to Use When: Issue is not very important Emotions too strong or timing not right Need to gather more information

Inappropriate to Use When: Issue is really important Not resolving will escalate and make it worse, or more difficult

to resolve later on


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Conflict Handling Style: Power/Competing

What Happens:

Relies on authority that comes from ones position

Appropriate to Use When:

Individuals unable to settle themselves

Speed is of the essence

Inappropriate to Use When:

When those in conflict have no opportunity to expresstheir needs or fulfill their self-interest

Parties may not be committed to act on a dictatedsolution


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Feedback Model

CARE Feedback

Clearly describe behavior

Address reactions to behavior Realistic expectations shared

Expected result identified


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Example Using CARE Model:Let someone know how helpful theyve been meeting a

difficult deadline.


Sonam, Im very grateful for the extra time you put in last weekto finish coding the statements for our project.

Address reactions to the behavior

You not only saved everyone time and prevented confusion, yourmethodical approach is also easy for everyone to grasp

Realistic expectations shared

I know I can count on you in the future.

Expected resultsIll keep my eyes open for other opportunities for you to shine!


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Example Using CARE Model:Let Ashish know he missed an opportunity to win over an

upset customer.


Ashish, Id like to share a way you can handle an angry customer byparaphrasing what he said right at the beginning of the call.


This will let your customer know youve heard his concern and care abouthim


You could say something like, Mr. Jones, I can appreciate how upset youare about xxx not arriving on time.

Expected results

Ill e-mail you several words to use when paraphrasing. Try them duringyour calls today, and Ill check back with you tomorrow to see how itsgoing.


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Practice Example: Worksheet

Use the CARE Model to let someone know they used the wrong screens in thesystem, and gave out inaccurate info.




Expected results


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Practice: Possible Answer

Clearly describe behaviorI just observed your last call and Id like to give you the correct

process to follow for shipping xyz product. Address reactions to the behavior

Youve put the customer address in the wrong screen, so shippingwill not have the correct information, and the customer will be

upset when they dont receive xyz. Realistic expectations shared

Let me show you now the process and well correct the informationfrom your last call, and show you in the knowledge base where tocheck the process the next time.

Expected resultsPlease print out the process from the knowledge base, and go

through your other records to be sure youve put in the informationcorrectly. Gretchen on your team can help you immediately if yourun into any problems.


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Self-Mediation Technique

Find a Time to Talk

Plan the Context

Talk it Out

Make a Deal


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Find a Time to Talk

Ask

When can wemeet to discuss our

opinions? Identify specificallywhat you want totalk about

Respectfullyrequest time

Jo, do you have a minute

to talk about our earlier

conversation about the work

I did for the team? Imuncomfortable with not

understanding what you

found unacceptable. Are

you willing to meet to talkabout this so we can reach

an agreement for future

work?


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Plan the Context

Open with an expressionof appreciation andoptimism

Agree on cardinal rules No interruptions

Agree on stop time

No power or force forone sided solution

State issue

I appreciate your

willingness to meet

with me to talk thisout. Im hopeful well

have a solution that

will benefit both of

us. Please tell me

how you see the work

I did wasnt

complete.


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Talk It Out

Restate to clarify what youheard from the otherperson

Ask Questions to Clarify Non-judgmental tone

Check in for accuracy?

What I hear you

say is that youre

concerned I didntinclude opinions

of our part time

staff in the survey.

Is that correct?


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Make a Deal

Possible Alternatives

What I will do

What you will do

Okay, so Ill repeat the

survey for the part time staff.

You will get me a list of theirnames, including third shift,

by tomorrow. Ill share the

results at our next results

meeting on the 25th.


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Expressing Feelings and Listening

Express Feelings with IMessages:

I feel

I am upset by

I do not like it when

Express What You Want I want you to

I wish you would

Express Appreciation of

I appreciate your position

I imagine you feel

Express What Heard BeforeRespond

I understand.

I heard you say

Express what will do..

I can

I will

I plan to.

Conflict Resolution Vally

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