Conflict as a Motivator

Conflict can motivate people to think harder, take

action and learn

Agree to disagree

Exploration of those disagreements to generate

positive change

Thinking about conflict

Who was

involved?

What was

happening?

How did

you feel?

Click the play arrow when you’re ready to continue.

Exercise 1

Think about how we cope with conflict and how

to support others through conflict.

Learn to direct energies created by conflict to promote

positive change.

Objectives:

To understand that conflict can be

positive and is inevitable if change is

to happen.

Why do we engage

in conflict?

Disagreement

Strong collision of values, needs, interests

Desire to change or do things differently

Not seeing eye to eye

“We cannot solve a problem with

the same thoughts that created the

problem; we need to think differently.”

—Albert Einstein

Listen well

Explore and expand new possibilities

Build stronger relationships

Person Centered Thinking and Planning

helps us to:

Moving through conflict with Ryan’s parents

Met with Mr. and

Mrs. Woods

Ryan needed

different services

Both the parents

were upset

Learned what was

Important to Ryan

Better understanding of

the circumstancesProvide the family with

other resources

Thought Exercise

Who was involved?

What were the outcomes?

What were the positive outcomes?

Journal

Exercise 2

Optimistic Discontent

Cynical Discontent

Where most learning occurs

What makes your

volcano explode?

Comfort

Stretch

Danger

Explode!

Stretch

Situation Physical/Emotional Signs

• Exploration and discovery

• Stretching physically, mentally, or emotionally

• Giving feedback, having to say no to requested

service

• Feeling nervous

• Scared of disappointing

• Worried

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Likely to become unproductive

Comfort

Stretch

Danger

Explode!

Danger

Situation Physical/Emotional Signs

• People exerting power

• Visibly unhappy

• People are defensive or dishonest to protect

their own self interest

• Scared of what will happen

• Loss of control

• Defensive

• Frustrated

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Returning from Danger

1. What do you do to move

away from danger and

back towards stretch

and comfort?

Exercise 4

Returning from Danger

What helps me better cope

with conflict

What is important to me

that is motivating my

disagreement?

• Important for others to hear

or understand about

my concern

What are my gifts and

strengths?

• Unique strengths

• Things you are proud of

What support do I need to express my view well,

and to keep me safe while I express my views?

• What would help you feel comfortable to share?

Coping with Conflict: another point of view:

A Guided Reflection

Breathe...

…contemplate questions…

…close your eyes.

Coping with Conflict Coping with

Conflict

What are the gifts and strengths of the person I disagree with?

What is important to that person that is motivating their disagreement with me?

What support do I need to express my views well and to keep me safe while I express my views?

Exercise 6

Guidelines for handling conflict

Conflict is necessary for

positive change

Recognize that a conflict exists,

and be aware of your own

reaction to this

Pause to consider how to ensure

that the person’s views can be

expressed and heard

Listen for what is important

to each party in the conflict

Conclusion

“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but

nothing can be changed until it is faced”.

— James A. Baldwin