Communication in Personal Relationships
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Transcript of Communication in Personal Relationships
Comm. in Personal Relationships1
Communication inPersonal Relationships
Imagine that suddenly you have no close friends and no romantic partner…….
Comm. in Personal Relationships2
Understanding Personal Relationships A Voluntary commitment between irreplace
able individuals who are influenced by rules, relationship dialectics, and surrounding contexts.
Features of personal relationships Uniqueness Commitment Relationship rules Embeddedness in contexts Relationship Dialectics
Comm. in Personal Relationships3
Features of Personal Relationships Uniqueness
Social relationship vs. Personal relationship
Connection defined by particular people and what they create
CommitmentA decision to remain with relationship,
intention to share with the futurePassion, Investment
Comm. in Personal Relationships4
Features of Personal Relationships
Relationship RulesGuiding communication and interactio
nConstitutive rules: Meanings in variou
s communicationRegulative rules: When and with who
m specified & “shalt not” in marriage, religious groups
Comm. in Personal Relationships5
Features of Personal Relationships
Embeddednes in contexts (social)Surroundings influence interactionsSocial norms in groupsParticular others & generalized othersApproval and disapprovalIncreasing cultural diversity
Comm. in Personal Relationships6
Features of Personal Relationships Relationship dialectics: Opposing vs.
Continuous tensionsAutonomy / Connection
• Wanting to be separated and connectedNovelty / Predictability
• Wanting routines and noveltyOpenness/ Closedness
• Desires to be open and to maintain privacy
Comm. in Personal Relationships7
Four Ways to Deal with Dialectical Tensions Neutralization
Negotiating a balance Separation
Favoring one and ignoring the other Segmentation
Assigning spheres Reframing
Redefining contradictions
Comm. in Personal Relationships8
Evolutionary Course ofFriendship (6 stages)
Role-limited interaction Friendly relations
Common ground and interest Moving toward friendship
Stepping beyond social roles Nascent friendship
Increased involvement and caring Stabilized friendship
Shared assumption of continuity & Trust Waning friendship
Ceased being committed
Comm. in Personal Relationships9
Evolutionary Course ofRomantic Relationship (3 phases)
EscalatingTypically six stages
NavigatingOngoing process of communication to
sustain intimacy over time Deteriorating
Intimacy weakens, dissatisfaction mounts
Comm. in Personal Relationships10
Escalating (6 stages)
Individuals not interacting Invitational communication
Proximity & Similarity Exploratory communication Intensifying communication
Involves idealized (more than real; euphoria), personalized communication (private codes)
Comm. in Personal Relationships11
Escalating
Revising communicationComing down to talk about strengths,
problems, the futureNegotiation, even conflicts
CommitmentDecision to stay with a relationship
permanently
Comm. in Personal Relationships12
Navigating
Dynamic (not stable), thru new problems
Relationship culture: The nucleusRules, understandings, patterns…Usually unspoken
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Deteriorating (5 phases)
Dyadic breakdown Degeneration of relationship culture Gender differences (p. 202)
Intrapsychic phase Brooding about problems, thinking about alte
rnatives Dyadic phase
Not always occur, tends to involve conflict Avoiding taking about problems
Comm. in Personal Relationships14
Deteriorating
Social phaseHow to explain breakupSeeking social support
Grave dressingBurying the relationship, accepting its
end
Comm. in Personal Relationships15
Styles of Loving (p. 201)
Eros 激情 ; 強烈 Storge 知己 ; 益友 Ludus 遊嬉 ; 挑戰 Mania 狂熱 ; 極端 Agape 無我無私 Pragma 務實 ; 理性
Comm. in Personal Relationships16
Challenges inPersonal Relationship Dealing with distance
Lack of daily communication Unrealistic expectation for time together
Managing dual-career relationship Lack of equity Women with more psychological responsibilities
Resisting violence and abuse between intimates Violence seldom stops without intervention Predictable cycle (p. 208)
Negotiating safer sex More difficult to talk about sex than to engage in it Under influence of alcohol or drugs