Charlotte's Web Act II

8/16/2019 Charlotte's Web Act II

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ACT TWO

SCENE: An open area at the Fairgrounds. UL is the

facade of a shed with a spider web attached.

(Music ilREPRISE: COUNTY FAIR

Act II OPENING)

FAIRGOERS.

A WONDERFUL DAYFOR rne FAIR

A WONDERFUL DAYFOR mE FAIR

A WONDERFUL DAYFOR ras FAIR

OTIlER FAIRGOERS.

mE DAYS OF SUMMER DRlFfING ON

BARKER (standing

next

to a scantily-dressed WOMAN).

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, STEP RIGHT UP

TO mE WONDERFUL SIGHTS-

(To a wide-eyed CHILD looking on.)

HEY, KID, WOULD YOU TRYNOT TO STARE

FAIRGOERS.

SUMME~SUM~SUMME~SUMME~

SUMMER'S ALMOST GONE.

54

Act II

CHARLOITE'S WEB

Page 55

CONCESSIONAIRE (carrying a trayoffood).

BARBECUED HAMBURGERS, FROZEN CUS-

TARD AND HOT DOGS WITH MUSTARD-

WOMAN (to her CHILD).

ALL THE THINGS YOU SHOULDN'T EAT

OFFICIAL.

PRIZES FOR. BEING THE FASTEST,

(Two CHILDREN race across the stage in sacks. The

OFFICIA L

gives the.winner a trophy.)

OFFICIAL.

PRIZES FOR BEING THE SMARTEST.

GIRL (speaking). Eleemosynary. (Spelling.) E-L-E-E-M-O-

(She falters]

OFFICIAL (giving her a trophy). That's close enough, kid.

(Singing.)

FOR. THE BEST DESSERTS

(Two WOMEN enter with cakes-one large and colorful;

the other small and drab. The OFFICIAL samples the

large cake, smiles, and unexpectedly hands the trophy to

the 2nd

WOMAN

with the small cake.)

1st WOMAN (with the large cake, speaking). That's my

cake

OFFICIAL (glumly, indicating the 2nd WOMAN). That's

my

wife. (Singing, brightlyagain.)

FOR. THE LARGEST



Page 56

CHARLOTIE'S WEB

Actll

(A FARMER enters holding a verylargepotato. The OF-

FICIAL speaks.]

OFFICIAL That 's a pretty small melon.

FARMER (somewhat indignant). I t' s a pretty big potato.

OFFICIAL Ob. sorry, (Singing.)

AND TOMORROW, LIVESTOCK JUDGING

FAIRGOERS.

A WONDERFUL DAY FOR THE FAIR



(FERN enters, followed

by

WILBUR who is tied to a

rope.

The y

go to a pen that has been set up for WIL-

BUR.)

FERN. We're back

FAIRGOERS (singing).

A WONDERFUL DAY FOR mE FAIR

A WONDERFUL DAY FOR THE FAIR


(The FAIRGOERS, FAIR PERSONNEL, etc., exit.

FERN unties WILBUR who rolls in some straw.

HOMER and JOHN enter with a trough. LURVY fol-

lows with a bucket.)

HOMER. Right over here, John ... Lurvy.

ctll

CHARLOTIE'S WEB

Page 7

(JOHN and HOMER set the trough down. LURVY

pOUTS

in the slops. MARTHA enters scrubbing AVERY s

face with a washcloth.)

MAR1HA. Hold s ti ll. Avery. There's something behind

your ear. Chewing gum

AVERY. I was saving it for the midway.

(EDITH enters with a sponge and a large jar of butter-

milk. LURVY exits.)

VOICE ON LOUDSPEAKER (offstage). Attention,

please Wi ll the owner o f a Pontiac car, l icense num-

ber H-two, four, three, nine, please move your car

away from the fireworks shed

HOMER ( to EDITH, who has begun to bathe WILBUR).

What are you doing, Edith?

EDITH. Giving the pig a buttermilk sponge bath-so

he'll look nice and clean for the judges.

FERN. Can I have some money?

AVERY. Can I, too?

(LURVY enters wi th a wooden sign reading: Zucker-

man s Famous Pig. )

LURVY. Here 's the sign from Wilbur's c rate , Mr. Zuck-

erman.

HOMER. Good, Lurvy. We'll set it righ t here so every -

body will know this is the pig they've been hearing

about.

(He and LURVY prop the sign up next to WIL-

BUR s pen.) Zuckerman's Famous Pig.



Page 58 CHARLOlTE'S WEB Actn

LURVY. If we're finished for the t ime being, Mr. Zuck-

erman, I think I'll go down to the midway and meet

some of my friends.

HOMER. Sure thing, Lurvy.

LURVY. Maybe I'll even win one of those Navajo

blankets I 've been hearing about. (He

exits.)

HOMER. It's great to be at the Fair, isn't it? I'm nearly

as excited as the k ids. Let 's go look at the new tractors,

Edith.

EDTIH

(drying WILBUR, who is asleep, with a towel).

Let

me just dry him off . Look, he's asleep.

JOHN. Martha, let's wander over to the cattle barn and

see the Holsteins and the Guernseys.

MARlHA Come along, children.

FERN. But . ..we want to go to the midway .

MARlHA You stay with us now.

FERN and AVERY. Awww.

JOHN. Oh, Martha, why don't we let them go off by

themselves. The Fai r only comes once a year.

FERN

and AVERY anxiously await the answer.)

MARlHA Oh . .. v ery wel l. FERN and AVERY cheer as

J OHN g iv es

them some money.) But you meet us back

here in half-an-bour.

JOHN. That's right. We' ll be leaving in a l it tle whi le .

EDTIH. Yep,

tomorrow s

the big day.

HOMER. The day when that

pig-(Pointing to the sleep-

ing WILBUR.) -

is going to win a blue ribbon.

(They

cheer as WILBUR

stirs.

Th e

ADULTS

begin

to leave,

shou ti ng i n st ruc t ions back to the CHILDREN.)

JOHN. Don't eat lots of stuff that's going to make you

sick to your stomachs.

MARlHA Don' t fal l off the rides .

EDrnL Don't get lost

Actn CHARLQlTE'S WEB

Page 59

MARTIIA Don't get dirty

HOMER. Don't go near strangers

JOHN. Don 't lose your money

DITH. And don't cross the racetrack when the horses

are coming

(The ADULTS exis.)

(Music #13. DON'T,,)

FERN

singing).

THEY SAYTHOSE THINGS SO MUCH;

THEY mINK WE HAVEN'T HEARD.

AVERY.

BYNOW I'VE FIGURED OUT

GROWN-UP'S FAVORITE WORD

FERN speaking). Don't

AVERY. Don't

BOTH singing).

DON'T-

AVERY.

-LET YOURSELF GET OVERHEATED

Born.

DON'T-

FERN.

_ LET YOURSELF GET COLD

Barn.

OON'T-



Page 60 CHARLOTIE'S WEB

Act II

FERN.

-ALWAYS ARGUE

AVERY.

WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

BOrn.

DO WHAT YOU'RE TOLD

(They dance,

mimick ing

adults.)

DON'T-

FERN.

-LEAN YOUR ELBOWS ON THE TABLE

BOrn.

DON'T-

AVERY.

- WEAR.YOUR HAIR SO

WNG

BO'IH.

DON'T - SPEND SO MUCH TIME USTENING

TO 11I0SE ROCK AN D ROLL SONGS

AVERY (speaking,

mimick ing

an adult). You'll wind up

deaf- that 's what you 'l l be.

FERN. What did you say?

BOTII s inging).

DON'T DO 11IIS

DON'T DO THAT

WHAT CAN WE DO TO HAVE FUN?

Act II

CHARLOTTE'S WEB

Page 61

DON'T SLUMP

DON'f SLURP

DON'f JUMP

DON'T BURP OOH

AVERY.

DON'T YOU RUN

Speaking.)

Not ins ide the house. You jus t broke that vase

was

saving for your marriage.

FERN. Marriage?

BOTH singing).

DON'f-

FERN.

~OMB YOUR HAIR IN FRONT OF PEOPLE

BOTH.

DON'T-

FERN.

-FIDGET WHILE I TALK

BOTH.

DON'T-

AVERY.

-WRITE THAT WORD ON COUSIN PHILLIP~

BACK WITH TH E CHALK

FERN speaking). I thought i t was funny.



Page 62

CHARLOTIE'S WEB

Actll

Born

singing).

DON'T EAT

rmsi

DON'T TOUCH TIlAT

WHERE CAN WE GO TO UNWIND?

STAND STRAIGHT DON'T SLOUCH

DON'T USE THAT COUCH OOH

AVERY.

TIlAT'S A CRIME

FERN

speaking).

I just f luffed those pil lows. They' re for

company

Born singing).

DON'T RAISE YOURVOICE UKE TIlAT TO

MOmER

DON'T MAKE NOISE WHILE YOU CHEW

DON'T-

FERN.

-LEAVE YOUR CLOmING mERE;

YOUR BEDROOM LOOKS UKE A ZOO

TIlAT'S WHY I UKE ras FAIR,

'CAUSE mERE YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU'RE

NOT SUPPOSED TO DO

BOrn.

TIlAT'S WHY I UKE mE FAIR,


NOT SUPPOSED TO DO

Actll CHARL01TE'S WEB

Page 63

TIlAT'S WHY I UKE mE FAIR,


NOT-

(A CONCESSIONAIRE has entered with a tray of

food.)

AVERY speaking). Hey, could we have two chili dogs?

FERN. And two frozen custards.

CONCESSIONAIRE. With sprinkles?

FERN and AVERY. Do it

(They take the food and pay

the CONCESSIONAIRE who

exits.)

FERN. I'm going on the rides.

AVERY. I'm going to the arcade.

FERN. Don't lose your money.

AVERY. Don't fal l off the Ferris wheel .

FERN. Don't forget to-(They look at each other

sheepishly.)

Let's

don t

say don't again.

AVERY. Okay. 'Bye They e xi t q u ic kl y i n

opposite

direc-

tions.)

(Music #13A. PLAYOFF: DON'T )

(TEMPLETON appears from behind a crate or box;

CHARLOTTE entersfrom behindthe web.)

lEMPLETON. Finally-the coast is clear. I think I'll do

a

little exploring.

CHARLOTIE. Please br ing me back a word, Templeton.

(TEMPLETON

exits.) I f I don't wri te something. I'm

sure Wilbur wil l have a difficult t ime winning that blue

ribbon, (She looks at the sleeping WILBUR.) He's a



4

CHARLOTIE'S WEB

Actll

cute little pig, and smart. But I'm sure there will

be

bigger pigs here. And evenbetter-looking ones.

U NC LE , a la rg e pig, en ter s sniffi ng a ro un d. A m om en t

l at e r h e s e es CHARLOTTE .)

UNCLE. Hi, there.

CHARLOlTE. MayI haveyour name?

UNCLE. No name. Just callme Uncle.

CHARWlTE. Very well...Uncle. You're rather large.

Are you a spring pig?

UNCLE. Sure, I'm a springpig.What did you think I was,

a spring chicken? Haw, haw,that was a good one. Eh,

sister?

CHARWlTE. Mildly funny. I've heard funnier ones,

though. What are you doing over here?

UNCLE. They're still working on my pen. I just walked

away. They'll come after me when they see I 'm gone.

But I thought I'd wander around and look at the com-

petition.

(He looks down at WILBUR.)

Well, no prob-

lem here. From what I've seen sofar, I 've got that blue

ribbon all sewed up. But I·won't

needle

you about it.

Get it? Haw,haw.

VOICE

(offstage).

Uncle Where are you, Uncle?

UNCLE. Well, better be getting back. I've got to get spif-

fy for the crowdsthat willbe comingto admire me. So

long, sister.

A s h e e xi ts , W IL BUR w ak es u p.)

wn.BUR

drowsily).

Oh, hi, Charlotte. Where is every-

body?

CHARLOlTE. Off to see the Fair.

wn.BUR. Did I hear you talking to someone?

CHARL01'T.E. A pig that's stayingnext door.

wn.BUR. Is he better than me? I mean...bigger?

~

Actll

CHARLOTTE'S WEB Page 65

CHARLOTTE. I 'm afraid he is much bigger.

WILBUR. Oh, no.

CHARLOTTE. But so what?

(Music

14. ' 'YOU'RE YOU',)

CHARLOTTE singing).

mERE IS ALWAYSSOMEBODY BIGGER;

THAT'S NO GUARANTEE HE'LL WIN THE

PRIZE.

POSSIBLY SOME GIRL LIKE ME MAY LIKE

THE SMALLER SIZE.

AND THERE'S PROBABLY SOMEBODY

SMARTER WHO IS STRONG AND KINDA

CUTE,TOO.

DON'T YOU CARE 'BOUT WHO'S OUT mERE,

'CAUSE mERE IS JUST ONE YOU.

LOOK AT ANYSNOWFLAKE-mERE'S NO

FLAKE THE SAME,

WE SPIDERS KNOW WHEREOF WE SPEAK.

SO, IF YOU ARE FALLING AND ALLWET AND

COLD,

REMEMBER PAL, YOU'RE UNIQUE

SO, DON'T SIT AROUND WOND'RING WHO'S

BETTER

IF THEY LIKE YOU OR WILL YOU FIT IN,

REMEMBER, NOBODY'S GOT mOSE SAME

EYES,

NOBODY'S GOT THAT SAME SIZE,

NOBODY OWNS THAT DOPEY GRIN.

YOU'RE YOU-AND YOU ALWAYSGOT A

CHANCE.



Page 66 CHARLOTrE'S WEB Actn

SO, WHAT IF THERE'S SOMEBODY BIGGER?

SO, WHAT IF THERE'S SOMEBODY SMARTER?

COME ON, LET TIlE GAMES BEGIN

YOU'RE YOU, AND YOU'VE ALWAYS GOT TIlE

CHANCE TO WIN

NOBODY'S GOT TIlOSE SAME EYES

NOBODY'S GOT TIlAT SAME SIZE,

NOBODY OWNS TIlAT DOPEY GRIN.


CHANCE.

SO, WHAT IF TIlERE'S SOMEBODY BIGGER?

SO, WHAT IF TIlERE'S SOMEBODY SMARTER?

COME ON, LET THE GAMES BEGIN


CHANCE TO WIN

(She and WILBUR embrace}

(Two SPECTATORS enter. CHARLOTTE eases into

the background)

FIRST SPECfATOR. Well, here's a good-looking fellow.

(He reads the sign.)

Zuckerman's Famous Pig.

(WIL-

BUR smiles.)

SECOND SPECfATOR. Look at his silky white coat.

And his nice, curlytail.

FIRST SPECfATOR. I think he's the finest pig we've

seen today.

SECOND SPECfATOR

(looking offstage).

Let's go look

at that pig overthere. (He exits.}

FIRST SPECfATOR (to WILBUR). I think I've heard of

you. Aren't you that radiant pig who's supposed to

be terrific ? (WILBUR smiles and nods.)

Actn CHARLOTI'E'S WEB

Page 67

(Music: ;;15. INCIDENTAL: THE COMPETITION,,)

SECOND SPECfATOR offs tage). Look over here at this

pig. (The FIRST SPECTATOR exits .) He's gigantic.

FIRST SPECfATOR

o ffs tage) .

And he seems to be

vel)

confident.

SECOND SPECfATOR offstage). He may get the blue

ribbon after all.

FIRST SPECfATOR

offstage).

Well, let 's golook at the

horses and see if we canpick the winner over there.

WILBUR. Oh, dear. Did you hear that, Charlotte?

CHARLOTfE. Chin up, young friend. Those weren't the

judges. They were merely the spectators. The judges----~~

are the ones who count.

(TEMPLETON enters carrying an art ic le tom f rom a

newspaper.)

TEMPLETON (handing it to CHARLOTTE). Well, here's

your order.

CHARLOTfE. I hope you brought a good one. I t is the

last word I shallever write.

WILBUR (alarmed). Charlotte, what do youmean?

CHARLOTfE (studying the article). Templeton, my eyes

seem to be going. I'm having trouble reading this.

What's the word?

TEMPLETON. Humble.

(He spells

it

out.)

Hsu-m-b-l-e.

CHARLOTfE. Humble has two meanings. It means not

proud and it means closeto me ground. That's Wil-

bur all over.

TEMPLETON. Well, I hope you're satisfied.NowI'm go-

ingto enjoy myself.This Fair is a rat's paradise. What

eating What drinking 'Bye, 'bye, my humble Wilbur.



Page 70 CHARLO'ITE'S WEB

Actn

CHARLOTTE. No. It 's something for me for a change.

(The lights begin to fade. Fireworks are heard in the

background. Special lighting effects may accompany the

sounds.}

Wll .. .BU R.

Listen. It's the fireworks.

CHARLOTTE. Fireworks are an important part of the

Fair. (She and WILBUR listen for a moment. The

sounds begin to fade.

If

used, the special lighting effects

also fade.)

WIT.BUR. This is the first night I've ever spent away

from home. A pause. I'm glad you're with me, Char-

lot te . I never feel lonely when you're near.

CHARLOTTE. Thank you.

Wll... BUR.

Even if I don't win the blue ribbon ... a nd the

worst happens ... I will never forget you.

CHARLOTTE. That 's very nice of you to say. Now, go to

sleep.

Wll.. .BUR. Good night. (WILBUR stretches out and goes

to sleep.)

CHARLOITE. Well ... f inally things are quiet around

here. It's a good time for me to work. (CHARLOTTE

goes tohe» web, and beginsto work.)

(Music #17. INCIDENTAL: CHARLOTfE ATWORK,,)

CHARLOTTE. I'm even more exhausted than I though t.

But this has to be done... Payout line... Over to the

right ... Easy now . .. And tie it off. (The word Humble

begins to appear

in

the web. CHARLOTTE

sings

slowly).

TIlE MESSAGE IS SPUN. I'VE COME TO TI lE

END.

(She catches her breatk)

Act II

CHARLOTTE'S WEB Page 71

THE JOB THAT I 'VE DONE I 'VE DONE FOR

MY FRIEND.

(Speaking.)

Humble. Well, that's done. Now for another very

important task. And I must hurry. I t wil l be dawn

before very long. The judges will be making their

rounds pretty soon.

(She moves away from the web slightly. Though she is

largely obscured by the dim lights, her movements are

now very elaborate and mysterious. She produces an egg

sac which she places high on the web. She collapses and

crawls out of s ight . A light i lluminates Humble. The

general lights come up slowly.)

(Music l 17A. INCIDENTAL: JUDGES' ENTRANCE,,)

(Two or three JUDGES enter silently. They observe the

sleeping WILBUR, look at the word in the web, write on

a clipboard, then exit

in

the direction of Uncle spen. The

lights come up

full

as animal sounds are heard offstage.

WILBUR wakes up.)

WILBUR. Oh, look There's the new word. Charlott e,

Charlotte You've done it again.

(CHARLOTTE enters, yawning.)

HARLOTIE. Humble. It fits you perfectly.

WILBUR (looking at the eggsac). And what 's that object

up there? It looks l ike cotton candy. Did you make i t?

HARLOTTE. I did, indeed. I t' s my egg sac.

WILBUR. What 's ins ide i t? Eggs?



Page 72

CHARLOITE'S WEB

Actll

CHARL01T.E. Five hundred and fourteen of them.

WllBUR. You're kidding. Are you real ly going to have

five hundred and fourteen children?

CHARL01T.E w ith a to u ch o f sa dn ess) . H nothing hap-

pens, yes. Of course, they won't show up till next

spring. So will never see my children.

WllBUR. Of

course

you will. We'll all see them.

CHARLOTrE. Wilbur, don't feel good at all. My eggs

and may not make it back to the bam.

TEMPLETON

offstage).

What a night

(TEMPLETON

e nt er s. H i s s tom a ch i s b lo a te d. )

TEMPLETON. What a night What feast ing and carous-

ing. must have ea ten the remains of th irty lunches.

Oh, it was rich, my friends, rich

He em it s

a

l oud , sa t is -

f ie d si gh o r b elc h.)

CHARLOTrE. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

You'll probably have an attack of acute indigestion.

TEMPLETON. Don't worry about me. Wilbur's the one

you should be worrying about.

CHARLOTrE. What do you mean?

TEMPLETON. I've got some bad news for you. As

came past that pig neet door - the one that calls him-

self Uncle - I noticed a blue ribbon on the front of his

pen. That means he won first prize. Apause.)

(Music 1 8. I NC ID EN TAL: BAD NEWS,,)

CHARL01T.E softly). Oh

no.

W IL BU R s its d ow n s lo w-

ly .

CHARLOTTE

g oes to h im a nd

puts

he r

ann

around

him)

Actll

CHARLOITE'S WEB

Page 73

TEMPLETON. Wait t ill Zuckerman ge ts hankering for

some fresh pork and smoked ham. He' ll take the knife

to you, my boy.

W I LBUR s ta r es s tr a ig h t a h e ad .)

CHARLOITE. Be st il l, Templeton Don't pay any atten-

tion to him, Wilbur.

TEMPLETON. I'll bet he's so scared he's going to faint

again.

WIT.BUR

a ft er a b ea t, s ti ll l oo k in g a h ea d) .

No, I'm not.

An ot h er b e at .) Whatever will happen, will happen. He

ga in s c o u rag e .)

may not live as long as I'd like, but

I've l ived very wel l. A good l ife is much more impor-

tant than just having a long l ife. So s tart ing now, I 'm

going to stop worrying about myself. There are more

important things than just thinking abou t yourse lf all

the t ime. Like

you ,

Templeton. You didn' t even notice

tha t Charlotte has made an egg sac.

TEMPLETON. Egg sac?

WIT.BUR

p o in ti ng t o t he e gg s a c ).

Up there . She is going

to become a mother. For your information, there a re

five hundred and fourteen eggs in that peachy little

sac.

TEMPLETON. Well, congratulations This

has

been a

night

H e fi nd s a n o u t- of- th e- wa y s po t, c ov er s h in is elf

w ith s om e s tr aw o r a n o ld b la nk et , a nd g oe s t o sleep.

CHARLOTTE. I 'm sorry about the b lue ribbon, Wilbur.

But you 're being very brave about i t.

WILBUR. Bravery is just one of the many things I've

learned from you, Charlotte ...my friend.

FERN

o ffs tage).

Look Look, everybody

FERN

runs

in.)



Page 74

CHARLOTIE'S WEB

Act II

FERN. Look at what it says in Charlotte's web Hum-

ble.

(ED/11/; carrying a jar of buttermilk and a towel, enters.

MARTHA, JOHN and LURVY, carrying a bucket, and

HOMER enser.)

MARlHA My goodness Humble.

EDfIH.

Another

miracle

HOMER. He's sure to win that blue ribbon nowl

(ALL

cheer.)

AVERY

(offstage).

Oh, no I can 't believe it

JOHN. What is it, Avery?

(AVERY enters.)

AVERY. That pig over there has already won first prize.

(ALL arein shock}

AlL (ad libbing).

What? Have the judges been here al-

ready? Oh, no. I can't believe Wi lbur didn't win. This

is terrible.

(EDITH sobs. LURVY blows his nose into a

handkerchief)

AVERY. It's not fair. He won just because he's fat. I'll

bet the judges are fat, too.

(ALL are quiet for a mo-

ment . MARTHA, EDITH and LURVY blowtheir noses}

HOMER. Hold on, here. What's everybody crying about?

Edith, give the pig his buttermilk bath.

EDfIH. But . .. he didn 't win.

HOMER. People are still going to come by and see him

•••and

what's writt en in the web. Now, let's get busy.

(ALL try to be a bit cheerier.)

JOHN. That's the spirit, Homer.

Act II

CHARLOTI'E'S WEB Page 75

LURVY. I 'l l g ive him his breakfast.

(He pours the slops.

WILBUR tries to eat.)

MAR1HA. I 'l l help with the bath, Edith. (She does so.)

JOHN. Fern, you and Avery t idy up the area.

(FERN and

AVERY smooth out straw and generally straighten up.)

VOICE ON LOUDSPEAKER

(offstage).

Attention,

please Attention, please We would like to ask as

many of you as can to assemble in the livestock area

where we are about to present a special award.

EDITII. Special award?

HOMER. I t must be for the cows. .. or the horses.

VOICE ON WUDSPEAKER

(offstage).

When you ar-

rive at the livestock area, please go to the section

where the pigs are located.

JOHN. It sounds like somebody around here's going to

get another award.

AVERY. That fat pig over there.

VOICE ON WUDSPEAKER

(offstage).

We will ask you

to report directly to the pig owned by Mr. Homer

Zuckerman.

(ALL are dumbfounded.)

AVERY (slowly comprehending). The pig owned by Mr.

Homer ... (He throws straw into the air.) Ya-hoo

(Music 1 9 . INC IDENTAL: V ICTOR .Y )

(There are cheers, hugs, kisses and general congratula-

tions. WILBUR is ecstatic. CHARLOTTE, unseen

by

the

OTIlERS, inches out and gives WILBUR the okay sign

with herfingers.)

HOMER. We've got no time to lose. Finish bathing him,

Edith.

(EDITH and MARTHA redouble their efforts.)

LURVY. I 'l l get a l it tle more straw.

(He exits hurriedly.)



Page 76

ActD

HARLO'ITE 'S WEB

JOHN. I'l l he lp you, Lurvy.

He ex it s. )

EDfIll. Homer, does my bair look all r ight?

HOMER (busy, straightening things up). Looks fine.

EDfIH. You didn't even look at my bair.

MARTHA. You're all right, Edith. Jus t keep calm.

(LURVY enters with more straw.)

EDITII. Okay, Wilbur's finished. I'll put tbese things

back in the truck.

(EDITH exi ts , coll iding wi th JOHN who enters. BOTH

laugh.)

JOHN. Sorry, Edith.

(Three, or more, FAIRGOERS enter at various points as

they gather for the award presentation.)

FIRST FAIRGOER. Good morning.

HOMER. Hello, there.

FIRST FAIRGOER. Is this the Zuckerman pig?

HOMER. Yes, indeed.

SECOND FAIRGOER. There he is. That 's tbe pig we've

been hearing about.

MARTHA Zuckerman' s famous pig. That's him.

SECOND FAIRGOER. He looks like a prize winner to

me.

THIRD FAIRGOER. He isn't as big as that pig next

door, but be' s cleaner . That' s what I l ike.

FIRST FAIRGOER. So do 1

SECOND FAIRGOER. And he's humble, too. Just l ike

it says in the spider web.

ActD

CHARLOITE'S WEB

Page

77

1HIRD FAIRGOER. Yes, sir. Mighty fine pig you got

there, folks.

HOMER. Thank you.

(EDITH enters and HOMER puts his arm around her.A

REPORTER and PHOTOGRAPHER are among the

CROWD that begins to enter.)

CROWD

(ad libbing).

Is this where the ceremony is? I

saw tha t pig yesterday at the Zuckerman farm.

hear

he's going to have his picture in the

Weekly Chronicle.

(Etc.)

An

ANNOUNCER, canying a portable public address

system, enters. He elbows his way through the CROWD.)

ANNOUNCER. Coming through Coming through Let's

open it up a little, please. Thank you very much.

(He

looks at JOHN.) Zuckerman?

HOMER (going to the ANNOUNCER). Right here.

ANNOUNCER. Pleased to mee t you. (He and HOMER

shake hands. The ANNOUNCER cl imbs atop a crate or

box and yells to the unseen audience in the wings.}

Those of you who can't ge t in close, don't worry. You'll

hear everything you need to hear.

(He tests the public

address system again.) Testing, testing. Can everybody

hear me? (He doesn t wait for an answer.) Good. (He

clears his throat.) Ladeez and gentlemen, we now pre-

sent Mr. Homer L. Zuckerman's distinguished pig.

(Applause.) Many of you wi ll reca ll when the wri ting

f irst appeared myster ious ly on the spider' s web in Mr.

Zuckerman's barn, calling the attention of all to the



Page 80

CHARLoTrE s WEB

ActD

unseen, awakens. He quickly sizes up the situation, runs

to

WILBUR. and bites his tail)

WILBUR (stirring). Ouch (Before anyone realizes where

the sound came from, TEMPLETON and CHAR-

L01TE quickly crawl back out of sight. Shaken, WIL-

BUR

gets

up.)

IL adJibbing). Hooray He's up The pig's up Good

work, Zuckerman That's some pig

ANNOUNCER. And now, ladeez and gentlemen. may

have your attention for the official awarding of the

prizes. Here is twenty-five dollars for Mr. Zucker-

man ... (He hands the money to HOMER) ... and the

bronze medal for the star attraction of our County

Fair

(He ties the medal around WILBUR s neck as

ALL cheer and applaud. The PHOTOGRAPHER takes

pictures and the ANNOUNCER shakes hands with

HOMER. AVERY begins toshake hands all around)

IL (singing).

WILBUR. WE NEVER WILL UNDERSTAND

WHOSE HAND PUT THOSE WORDS mERE

WllERE-

MEN.

-NOW WE ALL CAN SEE-

WOMEN.

-NOW WE ALL CAN SEE-

MEN.

POSITIVELY.

ActD

CHARLOTTE'S WEB

Page

81

WOMEN.

WITH SINCERITY-

AIL.

-YOU'RE THE STAR OF OUR FAIR

(LURVY enters with a bucket of water. He tosses the

water toward WILBUR, but it splashes onto HOMER

and A YERy. ALL laugh.)

HOMER. What ails you, Lurvy'l Can't you see the pig is

all right?

LURVY. You asked for water .

HOMER. I didn't ask for a shower bath.

(ALL, including

HOMER, laugh. AYERY pretends to be taking a shower.

He rubs

imaginary

soap under his armpits and dries with

an

imaginary t owel .)

MARTHA (asALL continue to laugh). Avery, stop it

FERN. Stop showing off , Avery. (He continues to clown

around until MARTHA

leads

him awayfrom the center

of attention. The laughter

subsides.

ANNOUNCER. Now folks, if you'll proceed on to the

grandstand, you'll be just in time for the first heat of

today's harness races. Thank you one and all fo r your

presence at this historic awards ceremony. (The

CROWD cheers and begins

t o e x it .)

Excuse me. Coming

through. I 've got to go call the f irst race. (He edts.)

FERN. Look at Wilbur and his new medal. (WILBUR

beams.)

HOMER. We 're mighty pleased with you, boy. (He pals

WILBUR.) Well. now that the excitement' s died down.

I guess it 's t ime to be loading up.



Page 82

CH.ARl.OTIE'S WEB

ActD

JOHN. Homer, let's all celebrate the occasion

by

taking

one last look around the midway.

HOMER. Soundsgood to me.

FERN. Papa, may I have forty cents? It's myturn to take

Henry on the Ferris wheel.

(JOHN gives her the

money .) Thanks. (She exits.)

MAR1'HA

(smiling).

Henry Fussy.Imagine that.

JOHN. Well, let's go.

EOrrn. We'll be back in a jiffy,Wilbur.

LURVY. Wear that medal withpride, boy

(ALL, except WILBUR, exit. A moment later, FERN re-

tums.)

FERN. I 'm sorry, Wilbur, I was in such a hurry to meet

Henry, I forgot to tell you how proud I am of you. I

knew from the very first day that you were some pig.

(After a beat, she hugs WILBUR, then looks offstage.)

Henry Wait for me. Let's go for a ride on the Ferris

wheel. (She exits hurriedly.)

(Mus ic : 2A)A. I NC ID EN TAL: YOU S AVED

MYUFE )

WILBUR. Charlotte? Charlotte?

(CHARLOTTE slowly

comes

out

of

hiding.)

Oh, Charlotte. You have saved

mylife. And yet, I've never done anythingfor you.

CHARLOTIB. You have been myfriend. That in itself is

a tremendous thing. After all, what 's a l ife, anyway?

We're born, we live a little, we die. By helping you,

perhaps I was lifting up mylife a trifle. Heaven knows,

anyone's life can stand a little ofthat.

WILBUR. Charlotte, we're all going home today. Won't

it be wonderful to be backin the barn again?

ActD CHARWTfE'S WEB

Page 83

CH.ARl.OTIE. I wil lnot be going back to the barn. I'm

done for, Wilbur. In a day ortwo, I'll be dead.

WIlBUR. Charlotte

CH.ARl.OTIE. I'm so tired, I can't even crawl up to my

eggsac.

WIlBUR. Charlotte Mytrue friend.

CHARLOTfE. Come now, Wilbur, let's not make a

scene.

WIlBUR. I won't leave you alone to die. I shall stay,too.

CHARLOTfE. You can't. They won't let you. Besides,

there 'd be no one to feed you-to care for you.

(WIL-

BUR goes to the side of the pen and looks offstage.)

WIlBUR. I have an idea.

(He rushes to TEMPLETON

and awakens him) Templeton, Templeton Wake up

Pay attention

1EMPLETON. Can't a rat catch a winkof sleep?

WII.BUR. Listen to me Charlotte is very ill. She won't

be cominghome with us. I must take her egg sac with

me. I can't reach it, and I can't climb. Please,

please,

Templeton, climb up and get the egg sac.

1EMPlETON. Nothing doing.

WII.BUR. If you will, you can have first choice of every-

thing in my trough whenever Lurvy slops me back

home.

1EMPlETON. You mean that?

WII.BUR. I promise. I cross myheart. Hurry They'll be

back soon.

1EMPLETON

(after a pause).

All right, i t's a deal .

(He

climbs up toget the eggsac.)

WII.BUR. Use extreme care. I don't want a singleone of

those eggs harmed.

(TEMPLETON bringsthe eggsac to

WILBUR.)

Charlotte, I will protect it with all my

might. Thank you, Templeton. Nowyou'd better run to



P ag e 8 4

CHARLOTIE'S WEB

Actll

the truck and hide under the straw if you want a ride

back home.

TEMPLETON. You bet I'm going back home, now that I

get first choice of everythingin the trough.

(He

exas.

HOMER

(offstage).

We'll take care of Wilbur, Edith.

You drop the tai lgate of the pickup and get his crate

ready.

(CHARLOTTE hides as HOMER. JOHN and LURVY

enser.)

JOHN

(calling to offstage).

Martha, you and Fern and

Avery get in the truck. We'll be there in a minute.

(To

HOMER.)

I'll take the sign.

(He

l i f ts it.)

HOMER. Lurvy,you and can get everything else that's

left.

(They pick up the trough, bucket and any other be-

longings.)

You stayhere, Wilbur. I 'll be back for you in

just a minute.

(JOHN, HOMER and LURVY exit.

CHARLOTTE comes out slowly.)

WilBUR. Ob, Charlotte.

(They embrace]

(Music #21. INCIDENTAL: END OF FAIR )

CHARLOTTE. Goodbye, Wilbur. Thank you for saving

myeggsac.

(She starts to leave.}

WilBUR. Where are you going?

CHARLOTTE. Over...to that old empty shed. I need.•.to

be alone now.

WilBUR in

tears).

Nobody will be with you when-

when-

CHARLOTTE. Mythoughtswillbe with me. Thoughts of

you-and my life- and mychildren who will be com-

Actll

CHARLOTTE'S WEB

P age 85

ing in the spring. Thank you again for taking care of

my egg sac. Now

must go.

WilBUR

(trying to be brave).

Goodbye-Charlotte.

CHARLOTTE. Goodbye.••

my

friend.

(She exit s slowly as they wave to each other. A moment

later,

HOMER enters.)

HOMER. Well sir, it was a mightyfine fair. Mighty fine.

Come along, Wilbur. This will be a day you can tel l

your grandchildren about.

(He ties a rope around WILBUR s neck and begins to

lead him away. WILBUR stops for a moment and waves

one

f inal

time to the unseen CHARLOTTE. They exit.

The scene changes back to the Zuckerman bam.)

(Music #2lA. INCIDENTAL: BACK..TO THE BARN )

(TEMPLETON enters and goes to the trough.)

TEMPlEfON. Oh good. Wilbur hasn't eaten his break-

fast yet.

(He eats as the SHEEP and

LAMB

enter.)

lAMB. Wilbur hasn't eaten anythingthese past few days.

He keeps waiting out in the yardforthe eggsto hatch.

SHEEP. Templeton, you would livelongerif you ate less.

TEMPlEfON. Who wants to liveforever?

(The GOOSE and GANDER enter.)



Page 88

CHARLO'ITE'S WEB

ActD

THIRD SPIDER. Fine. I l ike that very much.

WILBUR (singing).

JOY, ARANEA, NELLIE. WELCOME TO YOUR

NEW HOME.

1HREE SPIDERS.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

FIRST SPIDER speaking . Where did you get that hand-

some medal you're wearing?

WILBUR. Well, it's a long story. And I'll tell you all

about it. But right now, I'm going to take the medal

off. H e t ak es

it

o f f .

SPIDERS and ANIMALS. What? Did you hear that?

What does he mean? Etc.)

WILBUR. To celebrate this very special day, I 'm putting

the medal where it rightfully belongs. Templeton,

please hang it on tha t nai l where Charlot te's web used

to be.

TEMPLETON. Another favor?

WILBUR. This i s the last one, I promise.

TEMPLETON (taking the medal from WILBUR). I know

- till the next one.

(Music

#23.

FINALE)

(TEMPLETON climbs up and hangs the medal on the

nail.}

VOICES (offstage, singing).

SUMMER, SUMMER, SUMMER, SUMMER. ••

ActD

CHARLO'ITE'S WEB

Page 89

Wll.BUR (speaking, after TEMPLETON climbs down). I

hereby dedicate my medal to the memory of dear

Charlotte whom I will never forget.

VOICES (offstage, singing).

SUMMER, SUMMER, SUMMER, SUMMER •••

SHEEP

speaking ;

Very thoughtful, Wilbur.

GANDER. None of us wil l ever, ever, ever forget ber .

Wll.BUR as VOICES offstage sing Aahs ). I wil l love

ber chi ldren and ber grandchildren dearly, but none of

them will ever take ber place in my heart. Sbe was in a

class by herself. (A brief pause. It is not often tbat

someone comes along who is

a

t rue friend and

a

good

writer. Charlot te was both. (ALL turn and look at the

medal which is

no w

lit

by

a SpeciaL)

WILBUR and ANIMALS

(singing).

WE HAD A FRIEND

VOICES (offstage).

SUMMER, SUMMER, SUMMER-AAH

CURTAIN

(Music #24. CURTAIN CAlL)

(Music #25. EXIT MUSIC)

lHEEND

Charlotte's Web Act II

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Transcript of Charlotte's Web Act II