Principal's Educational Conference 2015Theme: "Psychological requisites for erecting a

harmonious self".Title: Building Emotional Intelligence: A key to successful life

Ms. Aachal Taywade,P.G.T. Psychology,

Bhavan’s B.P. Vidya Mandir, Srikrishna Nagar, Nagpur.

• “Success is not about how many awards you receive or how much money you make, it’s about the difference you make in people’s life”

• Success is not defined in terms of living a luxurious life but in terms of living a harmonious life. For living a harmonious life, certain psychological skills are essential.

• Educationalists have the power to shape minds of upcoming generations; it is the responsibility of teachers and parents to train these minds for their life, to give them education for life, and not merely education for living.

Managing one’s emotions is the most important trait of a strong person. People who manage their emotions well are called as emotionally intelligent people. As teachers/ educationalists, it is important to promote emotional intelligence among our children. So what is emotional intelligence?

What is emotional intelligence?

Improving emotional intelligence

Be

empathetic

Think rationally

Be assertive

Be altruistic

Express yourselfEvaluate

yourself

Socialize

uncondition

al love and

acceptance

Have

purpos

e in life Positive attitude

Promoting emotional intelligence in classroom

• Show respect for each individual child’s feelings, and remember his negative feelings are indications of unmet emotional needs.

• Do not label your students negatively. Avoid ‘shoulds’ and avoid subjective labels.

• To lighten up the tension, set a goal of finding 3-30 things that everyone can agree on.

• Use humor.• Don't lecture them as they are

expressing themselves• Instead of saying ‘students’ try

to call them as ‘children’ or ‘kids’.

Promoting emotional intelligence in classroom

• Help your kids label their feelings properly. Teach them wide range of feeling words. Talk about feelings, ask them how they feel, teach them how they can feel, show empathy, concern and care for your children. Ask them how they feel and "What would help you feel better". Teach them to solve their own problems using empathy, compassion and mutual respect for each other's feelings.

• Support their individual needs, talents, potential and interests.

• Reassure the students that it is okay to be honest about their feelings. Tell them that if they feel hateful, hurtful, vengeful, violent or destructive, it is okay to say it.

Promoting emotional intelligence in classroom

• Let them say it without showing disapproval, shock, horror. By all means don't invalidate or judge anything they say. If you want them to open up, turn off your inner judge.

• Don't add to their pain, stress, discomfort and fear by trying to control their behavior through saying things like "Look me in the eyes when I am talking to you;" "Stop playing with your hair." Take your fingers out of your mouth." "Sit up."

While interacting with your students it is important to keep check on your language:

– Label your feelings rather than your students. Say “I am confused about why you aren't doing your work," rather than "You are just being lazy."

– Express your emotions rather issuing commands. E.g. I feel bad when I see you take things from others without asking. And I am afraid you might lose their friendship.

– Learn to take responsibility for your own feelings rather than blame them on your students. Eg., say "I felt embarrassed when the principal was here," rather than "You embarrassed me in front of the principal.

– First validate the student' s feeling before addressing their behavior. Eg. "It looks like you are feeling a little restless today." "It looks like you really don't want to come inside.

"If teachers make comments to kids that

are personally challenging or insulting to them as a person, the

kids will never look at their own behavior." The connected approach, on

the other hand, has gotten positive results "hundreds of times,"

Loftus says.