Book - Kid Stuff
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Transcript of Book - Kid Stuff
Kid Stuff(Poems written between the ages of 8 – 18)
What would Happen?
History Lessons
Good Manners
Leonard’s Nightmare
Square Dancing on the Hill
The Lonely Loon
Comeback of a Clown
Never Fall For a Porcupine
Teen Tips
What would Happen?
What would happen tell me pray
If the groundhog came today?
It is just the first you know
Would winter come, or would it go?
Would spring hasten on its way?
What would happen?
What if he would come the third?
That is something quite absurd,
The weather might be, oh, so bleak
And he’d go to bed for a long six weeks.
But if the sun were shining bright
What would happen?
If something should upset his schedule,
And he didn’t come out to see his shadow?
Ground Hog Day would be disrupted.
Everything quite interrupted.
What would happen if that would happen?
Poor old groundhog.
Age 9 – My first poem. It earned an Outstanding Minus (O+)
rating. The minus was for incorrect punctuation.
History Lessons
When reading about history
We sometimes think it’s dry
To learn how our ancestors
Taught airplanes how to fly.
And how they caught the lightning bugs
And caged them up in glass
So we could have the ‘lectric lights
To see in History Class.
And how they looked for many years
To find those little men
That fit inside the radio;
For history again.
But then I think when I’ve been gone
For quite a long, long while
If I could see my great-grandchildren
I would really have to smile.
If I could see their faces
With that cute disgusted look,
When they read ‘bout us kids doings
In their modern History book.
Good Manners
Leonard’s Nightmare
I dreamed a great big Apple Pie
With eyes and mouth and nose
And arms and legs was chasing me
And caught me by the toes.
Square Dancing on the Hill
Max is the youngest square dance callerIn the Town of ChanceHe started out by watchingWhen his folks went to a dance
He listened, learned and practicedWhen no one was at homeWith a borrowed square dance recordAnd a little microphone.
When he thought that he was readyAs ready as could beHe called his friends to join himFor a square dance jamboree
They started in the basementWhere he showed them all their placesThen he turned the music onAnd put them through the paces.
They soon learned how to dosidoAnd promenade the ringChain across and make a starLeft allemande and swing.
The kids were having so much funThey began to whoop and roarAnd soon the noise was plainly heardUp to the second floor.
Then Max heard his mother’s voice“Please go outside and playWhat are you doing in the houseOn such a sunny day?”
Max took the tape recorderAnd his little microphoneAnd they all gathered in the yardOf Max’s hillside home.
Max climbed upon a handy stumpAnd looked up at the hillThere’s a way to do this, he exclaimed\If you guys have the will.
Come on, he said, let’s square ‘em upWe can do this if we tryAnd he began to call a danceBeneath the clear blue sky.
All join hands and circle left
Go all around the squareSome go up and some go downAnd some go everywhere
Head two ladies chain acrossJust send her high or lowTurn around and send her backDon’t let her stub a toe.
Side two ladies, do the sameGuys send your gal acrossTurn around and send em backShow them who’s the boss.
Allemande your corner girl,Then dosido your ownIf you’re down you must go upIf up, you must go down.
Soon the neighbors heard the noiseAnd came outside to seewhat the excitement was aboutand soon joined in the glee.
Now folks come over once a weekAnd things are never stillWhen Max begins to call forThe square dance on the hill.
The Lonely Loon
A lonely loon was swimming along
And as she swam she crooned a song
She would drift back and forth
From the south to the north
With her head bowed down low
Did she search for a beau?
She was lovely, that loon
All alone ‘neath the moon
Swimming alone, all alone
I could hardly pretend,
That I’d be her friend
Cause I’m just a lone abalone.
One day, along came another lone loon.
Swimming alone upon the lagoon
He soon saw a lady loon floating by
It was nearly high tide
So he rushed to her side
Said “You look like you’re going to cry.
I’m alone and lonely; there’s just me only
I would certainly welcome a friend
Said he with a smile, we can drift for awhile
But there is no need to pretend
If you’ll be my bride, I’ll stay by your side
And we’ll never be lonely again.
Never Fall For a Porcupine
I love my mate, he’s really great
Although he’s sometimes prickly
And when he gets his dander up
You’d better move on quickly
He can be gentle as a lamb;
And usually quite benign.
Unless he’s mad; then don’t forget
That he’s a porcupine.
You’ll find that my true love is sweet
Though I don’t like to brag.
He wears his colors proudly
And loves to fly his flag.
He’s quick to defend his property
And he has a lot of spunk;
But be careful not to frighten him
After all he is a skunk.
My spouse is such a charmer
He sits upon a lily
And begs the ladies for a kiss
Well doesn’t he look silly?
If they believe he is a prince
They’re in for a surprise
He’s just a great big bull frog
Not royalty in disguise.
My love is fond of formal wear
And loves to strut his stuff
I’m always proud to walk with him
I just can’t get enough
Sometimes I think he doesn’t care
Then much to my chagrin
He lays a pebble at my feet
To show he’s my Penguin.
Comeback of a Clown
There once was a clown in the days of old,
And this is the way his story’s been told.
His name was Pepito, he could do lots of tricks
And the children that watched him sure got lots of kicks.
He was the most famous clown in the whole world around
For there wasn’t a better one to be found
But when the war started Pepito, you see,
Said since this worlds been so good to me
I’m leaving the circus and joining the army
The enemy will have a hard time to disarm me
No amount of coaxing would change the clown’s mind
He joined in the army to help all mankind.
So the days and the weeks and the months passed away
With no word from Pepito, the clown once so gay
We finally heard from the world famous clown
He was lying in a hospital in a foreign town.
His sight was gone, he was totally blind
And buried deep in Pepito’s mind
Was a picture so gruesome, a bomb from the skies
Had shattered the sight from his once alert eyes.
Except for that instant his mind was erased
His faith too was lost in the ruins of disgrace.
So two men decided to get him to act
To bring back to him the faith that he lacked
One day they visited Pepito’s room.
The ex-clown was moody and steeped in gloom.
Introductions didn’t do very much good
Pepito still looked like a man made of wood.
The younger man spoke then, and here’s what he said
My dad was a good man, though now he is dead.
He took me one night to see a great show
The performer was one everybody should know
Performing that night was Pepito the great
Known through every town, village and state
It was that night that I made up my mind
I’d be an actor and act for mankind.
“Yes, I remember well,” Pepito sighed
“Oh, is this him dad,” a tiny voice cried.
“The Mr. Pepito, you mentioned today.”
“And who is this,” they heard the clown say
“It’s my son, Chunky,” the man spoke once more.
“He’s heard me talk of you often before.”
“He said Mr. Pepito,” the clown stammered low
“Just like the children at my very last show
Ah how they laughed, I shall never forget
I see their faces in memory yet.”
“Please, do your act for me,” Chunky pleaded
This was the chance the two men needed
“We’ll get your clown suit and make-up and things
Can you perform without any rings?”
The clown said he would for the child’s delight
So he acted again though he had lost his sight
And billboards and newspapers soon proclaimed
That the circus was starring Pepito the famed
But he’d be surprised if he could but know
That Chunky was a dummy and was used in a show.
Pepito recovered the faith that he lacked
With the help of a dummy and ventriloquist act.
Teen Tips
Are you the belle of the ball
Or a flower on the wall?
Or are you just a simple stay-at-home?
It’s no secret I will tell;
You all could be a bell.
But you must use the hidden features that you own.
Now your hair is beauty plus
And it isn’t too much fuss
To comb your hair and brush it every night.
Then take a little care with the style of your hair
And choose one that will suit your face just right.
Now your face is next in line.
You use makeup? That’s just fine.
If you know the art of making up your face.
Study it a little more.
It’s all in beauty lore
To use makeup if it’s in the proper place