Biblical ParentingSession #5

Embracing and applying biblical truth in raising our children

The Goal of Parenting

The glory of God (1 Cor. 10:31, 2 Cor. 5:9)Faithfulness

The Priority of Marriage in Parenting

“One-flesh” vs. “not one flesh” relationships (Gen. 2:24)

Wrong Means & Goals in Parenting

Making children behaveNever telling children “no” – letting them

have their way all the timeSheltering them – “blank slate” approachLegalistic parentingDeterministic parenting

A Common Misunderstanding

Prov. 22:6 - Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.

Lit. – “train up a child in his own way, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Para – “train your child to always get his way, and when he grows up, he’ll still live to always get his way.”

This verse is a warning, not a promise.

The Means of Parenting

Deut. 6:4-9 A godly example (v. 6, cf. Ezra 7:10,1 Tim.

4:16) “In milieu” instruction (vv. 7-9)

Eph. 6:1-3 Teaching children that the place of God’s

blessing is when they honor and obey

Spiritual danger Spiritual danger

HONOR & OBEY

It will go well with you

Ephesians 6:1-3

Spiritual danger Spiritual danger

HONOR & OBEY

It will go well with you

Ephesians 6:1-3

Dishonors or disobeys

Spiritual danger Spiritual danger

HONOR & OBEY

It will go well with you

Ephesians 6:1-3

Dishonors or disobeys

?

Corrective Discipline

Discipline is corrective & restorative, not just punitive. It is designed to train (Heb. 12:11)

The goal of discipline is to bring a child back into the circle of blessing

Discipline should target the heart, not just deal with behavior

The manner and means must be biblical.The attitude and heart of the parent must

be right before God.

The Means of Parenting

Ephesians 6:4 Fathers Do not provoke your children to anger

Lack of marital harmony Establishing/maintaining a child-centered home Modeling sinful anger Consistently disciplining in anger Scolding Being inconsistent with discipline Having double standards Being legalistic (Making man-made rules equal to

God’s law, or a test of spirituality)

Lou Priolo, The Heart of Anger (Calvary press).

The Means of Parenting

Do not provoke your children to anger Not admitting when you are wrong Constantly finding fault Parents reversing God given roles Not listening to the child’s opinion or side of the story Comparing children to others Not having time to talk Not praising the child Failing to keep promises Chastising him in front of others Giving too much freedom Not giving enough freedom Making fun of the child

The Means of Parenting

Do not provoke your children to anger Abusing them physically Calling them names Having unrealistic expectations Showing favoritism toward one child over another Employing child-training methodologies that are

inconsistent with God’s Word

The Means of Parenting

But bring them up – “nourish” In the discipline – “training” – “guidance for

responsible [Christ-honoring] living” And instruction – “admonishment, “instruction” –

“counsel” Of the Lord – Christ & the Scriptures are the

content My example “In milieu” times of instruction Formal times of instruction Corrective discipline Participation in the body of Christ

A Vision for Parenting

Psalm 78