Benjamin On Hashish

7/29/2019 Benjamin On Hashish

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ProtocolstotheExperimentsonHashish,OpiumandMescaline1927-1934:TranslationandCommentary

[TranslatedbyScottJ.Thompson,copyrightMarch25,1997]http://www.wbenjamin.org/protocol1.html[Accessed18January2013]

ProtocolI:HighlightsoftheFirstHashishImpression[byWalterBenjamin:]Written18December[1927].3:30a.m.

1.Apparitionshover(vignette-like)overmyrightshoulder.Chillinthisshoulder.Inthiscontext:"Ihavethefeelingthatthereare4intheroomapartfrommyself."(Avoidanceofthenecessitytoincludemyself.)

2.ElucidationofthePotemkinanecdote[1]bytheexplanation,beitsuggestion:topresenttoapersonthemaskoftheirownface(i.e.,ofthebearer'sownface).

3.Oddremarksaboutaethericmask[thermaske],whichwould(obviously)havemouth,nose,etc.

4.Theco-ordinatesthroughtheapartment:cellar-floor/horizontalline.Spacioushorizontalexpanseoftheapartment.Musiciscomingfromasuiteofrooms.B

utperhapsthecorridor[is]terrifying,too.5.Unlimitedgoodwill.Suspensionofthecompulsiveanxietycomplex.Thebeautiful"character"unfolds.Allofthosepresentbecomecomicallyiridescent.Atthesametimeoneispervadedbytheiraura.

6.Thecomicalisnotonlydrawnoutoffacesbutalsooutofsituations.Onesearchesoutoccasionsforlaughter.Perhapsitisforthatreasonthatsomuchofwhatoneseespresentsitselfas"arranged",as"test":sothatonecanlaughaboutit.

7.Poeticevidenceinthephonetic:forawhileatonepoint,nosoonerhadImadeanassertionthanI'dhaveusedtheverywordinanswertoaquestionmerely

bytheperception(sotospeak)ofthelengthoftimeinthedurationofsoundineitherofthewords.Isensethataspoeticevidence.

8.Connection;distinction.Feelingoflittlewingsgrowinginone'ssmile.Smilingandflappingasrelated.Onehasamongotherthingsthefeelingofbeingdistinguishedbecauseonefanciesoneselfinsuchawaythatonereallydoesn'tbecometoodeeplyinvolvedinanything:howeverdeeplyonedelves,onealwaysmovesonathreshold.Typeoftoedanceofreason.

9.Itisoftenstrikinghowlongthesentencesonespeaksare.This,too,connectedwithhorizontalexpansionand(tobesure)withlaughter.Thearcadephenomenonisalsothelonghorizontalextension,perhapscombinedwiththelinevanishingintothedistant,fleeting,infinitesimalperspective.Insuchminutenessth

erewouldseemtobesomethinglinkingtherepresentationofthearcadewiththelaughter.(CompareTrauerspielbook:miniaturizingpowerofreflection).[2]

10.Inamomentofbeinglostinthoughtsomethingquiteephemeralarises,likeakindofinclinationtostylize[afewwordshereillegible]one'sbodybyoneself.

11.Aversiontoinformation.Rudimentsofastateoftransport.Considerablesensitivitytowardsopendoors,loudtalk,music.


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12.FeelingofunderstandingPoemuchbetternow.Theentrancegatestoaworldofgrotesquesseemtoopenup.Isimplyprefernottoenter.

13.Heating-ovenbecomescat.Mentionoftheword'ginger'insettingupthewritingtableandsuddenlythereisafruitstandthere,whichIimmediatelyrecognizeasthewritingtable.Irecalledthe1001Nights.

14.Thoughtfollowsthoughtreluctantlyandponderously.

15.Thepositionwhichoneoccupiesintheroomisnotheldasfirmlyasusual.Thusitcansuddenlyhappen--tomeittranspiredquitefleetingly--thattheentireroomappearstobefullofpeople.

16.Thepeoplewithwhomoneisinvolved(particularlyJolandFrnkel)areveryinclinedtobecomesomewhattransformed:Iwouldn'tsaythattheybecomealiennordotheyremainfamiliar,butratherresemblesomethinglikeforeigners.

17.Itseemedtome:pronouncedaversiontodiscussmattersofpracticallife,future,dates,politics.Theintellectualsphereisasspellbindingasisthesexualattimestopersonspossessed,whoareabsorbedinit.

18.AfterwardswithHesselinthecafe.Departurefromthespirit-world.Wavefarewell.

19.Themistrusttowardsfood.Aspecialandveryaccentuatedinstanceofthefeelingwhichagreatmanythingsoccasion:"Surelyyoudon'treallymeantolookthatway!"

20.Whenhespokeof'ginger',H[essel]'swritingtablewastransformedforasecondintoafruitstand.

21.Iassociatethelaughterwiththeextraordinaryfluctuationsofopinion.Morepreciselystated,itis,amongotherthings,connectedwiththeconsiderablesenseofdetachment.Furthermore,thisinsecuritywhichpossiblyincreasestothepointofaffectationistoacertainextentanoutwardprojectionoftheinnerfeelingofticklishness.

22.Itisstrikingthattheinhibitingfactorswhichlieinsuperstition,etc.,andwhicharenoteasytodesignate,arefreelyexpressedratherimpulsivelywithoutstrongresistance.

23.InanelegyofSchiller'sitiscalled"TheButterfly'sDoubtingWings"["DesSchmetterlingszweifelnderFlgel''].[3]Thisintheconnectionofbeingexhilaratedwiththefeelingofdoubt.

24.Onetraversesthesamepathsofthoughtasbefore.Onlytheyseemstrewnwithroses.

ProtocolII:HighlightsoftheSecondHashishImpression[byWalterBenjamin:]Written15January1928.3:30p.m.

Therecollectionislessvividalthoughthereverie[Versunkenheit]wasofadiminishedintensitycomparedtothefirsttime.Tobeprecise,Iwasnotaslostinthought[versunken],butmoreprofoundlyinward.Also,thegloomy,strange,exoticpassagesoftherauschhaunttherecollectionmorethantheluminousones.

Irecallasatanicphase.Theredofthewallsbecamethedeterminingfactorforme.Mysmiletookonsatanicfeatures:althoughitassumedmoretheexpression


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ofsatanicknowledge,satanicsatisfaction,satanicreposethanthesatanic,destructiveeffect.Thesenseofthosepresentintheroomasbeingsubmergedintensified:theroombecamemorevelvety,moreglowing,darker.InameditDelacroix.

Thesecond,quiteintenseobservationwasthegamewiththeadjoiningroom.Ingeneral,onebeginstoplaygameswithspaces.Beguilementsofone'ssenseofdirectionarise.What'srecognizedinanalertstateinthequiteunpleasantdisplacementwhichisaccidentallyconjuredwhen,travelingatnightontherearseatofatrain,oneimaginesone'stravelingonthefrontseatorthereverse,canbeexperiencedasbeguilementfromthetranslationofmotionintothestatic.

Theroomdisguisesitselfbeforeoureyes,wrapsitselfuplikeanalluringcreatureinthecostumesofthedispositions.IexperiencethefeelingthatnotonlytheimperialcoronationofCharlemagne,butthemurderofHenryIV,theratificationoftheTreatyofVerdunandthemurderofEgmontwereenactedinthenextroom.Thingsareonlymannequinsandeventhegreatworld-historicaleventsareonlycostumesbeneathwhichtheyexchangeglancesofassentwithnothingness,withthebaseandthebanal.Theyrespondtotheambiguouswinkingofnirvanaacrosstheway.Toresistbecomingimplicatedinanywayinsuchassent,then,iswhataccountsforthe"satanicsatisfaction"previouslyreferredto.Thisisalsotherootofaddiction,toimmenselyheightenthecollusionwithnon-existencebyintensifyingthedosage.Perhapsitisnoself-deceptiontosaythatinthisstateonedevelopsanaversiontowardsthefree,so-to-speakuranianatmospherein

whichthoughtsofthe"outside"becomealmostagonizing.Unlikethefirsttime,thereisnolongerthefriendly,amiablelingeringintheroomoutofpleasureinthesituationforitsownsake.Rather,athick,self-woven,self-spunspiderwebinwhichworldaffairshangstrewnaboutlikethecorpsesofinsectssuckeddry.Here,too,therudimentsofahostilestancetowardsthosepresentintheroomtakeshape;fearthattheywillbecomeabotherorcoulddragonedown.

Yetdespiteitsdepressiveelements,thisrauschhasitscatharticoutcomewhich,ifnotblissfullikethelast,nonethelesshasitsingenioussidewhichisnotwithoutitscharm.Exceptthatthiscomestoapeakastheeffectwearsoff,whichsetsforththecontextofdepressionmoreclearly.Forthisreasontheincreaseofdosagecould,undercertaincircumstances,playapartinthedepressivecharacter.

Doublestructureofthisdepression:firstfearandthenindecisioninrelatedquestionsofpracticality.Thisindecisionhasgainedmastery:suddenlyacoercivetemptationistrackeddowntoaveryconcealedmotive[Moment].Thepossibilityofyieldingtoitsomewhatwiththeprospectofovercomingitisthereforeattained.

Hungersetasanobliqueaxisthroughthesystemoftherausch.

Thegreathope,inclination,longingtoapproachthenew,theuntouchedintherauschcanhardlybeattainedanylongerinelatedfluttering,ratherintired,self-absorbed,relaxed,idle,sluggishdownhillmutation.Inthisdescent,onestillbelievesindevelopingacertainfriendliness,acertainattractiveness[Att

rativa]inordertocarryfriendsalongwithone'sdark-edgedsmile,halfLucifer,halfHermestraducens,nolongerthespiritandhumanbeingofthelastexperience.Lesshuman,moredaimonandpathosinthisrausch.

Thebadsimultaneityoftheneedtobealoneandthedesiretostaytogetherwithothersintensifies--afeelingwhichemergesindeeperfatigue,andwhichonewouldhaveindulged.Onehasthefeelingofonlybeingabletoabandononeselftothisambiguouswinkingofnirvanaacrossthewayentirelybyoneselfintheprofoundestsilence,andyetneedsthepresenceofothersasgentlyshiftingrelieffiguresonthepedestalofone'sownthrone.


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Hopeascushionwhichliesbeneathoneonlyjustnowtakingeffect.

Thefirstrauschmademefamiliarwiththeficklenessofdoubt;thedoubtinglaywithinmemyselfascreativeindifference.Thesecondexperiment,however,causedthingstoappeardubious.

Toothoperation.Noteworthymemoryshift.EvennowIcannotfreemyselffromthementalimage,thatthelocationhadbeenontheleftside.

Onthewayhomeaswell,whenthelatchonthebathroomdoorishardtolock,thesuspicion:experimentalset-up.

Onehearsthetubamiranssonans,plantsoneselfinvainresistanceagainstthetombstone.

Itiswell-knownthatwhenoneclosesone'seyesandgentlypressesagainstthemornamentalfiguresappearwhoseformwehavenoinfluenceupon.Thearchitecturesandspatialconstellationswhichoneseesbeforeone'seyesonhashishhavesomethingrelatedtothemintheirorigins.Whentheyappearandwhattheyappearasis,firstofall,involuntary,solightningquickandunannounceddotheyshowthemselves.Thenwhentheyaresuddenlythere,effortlessimaginationcomesmoreconsciouslyinordertotakecertainlibertieswiththem.

Onemaywellsayingeneralthatthesensationof"outside","outdoors"isconnectedtoacertainfeelingofaversion.Onemust,however,sharplydistinguishbetweenthe"outside"andthestillquiteextendedfieldofvision,whichforthepersoninthehashishrauschhasexactlythesamerelationtotheoutsidethatthestagehastothecoldstreetforatheatergoer.Nowandthen,however,thereissomethingbetweentheintoxicatedpersonandtheirfieldofvisionwhich--tocontinuethemetaphor--islikeaprosceniumthroughwhichanentirelydifferentairsweepsthroughtheoutside.Theproximityofdeathformulateditselftomeyesterdayinthesentence:deathliesbetweenmeandmyrausch.

Theimageofautonomicsignaling[Selbstanschluss]:certainmentalthingsofthemselveshavetheirsay,liketoothaches,whichatothertimesareratherfierce.Allsensations,mentalonesespecially,haveamoreintensegradientandseize

thewordsfromtheirlair.

This"ambiguouswinkingofnirvanaacrosstheway"hascertainlybeennowhereasvividasinOdilonRedon.

Thefirstdifficultimpairmentwhichtookplacewastheinabilitytomakeplansinadvance.Whenweexamineitcloseritisastonishingthatwearecapableofmakingplansfromonedaytothenext,i.e.beyondourusualdaydreams.Verydifficulttohavethedreams(ortherausch)onhashishatone'sdisposal.

Blochwantedtogentlytouchmyknee.Ihadalreadyperceivedthistouchlongbeforethesensationofitreachedme:Iperceiveitasahighlyunpleasantviolationofmyaura.Tounderstandthatonehastobearinmindthatallmovementsap

peartogaininintensityandmethodicalnessandthatassuchtheybecomeperceivedasunpleasant.

After-effect:perhapsacertainweakeningofthewill.Butastheeffectwearsoffexhilarationgainstheupperhand.Doestherecenttendencyofmyhandwritingtoinclineupwards[aufwrtssteigendeSchriftrichtung](despitemorefrequentdepressions)haveanythingtodowithhashish?[4]

Anotherafter-effect:onmywayhomeIsecurethelatchandwhenthereissomedifficultyindoingsomyfirst(andimmediatelycorrected)thought:experimental


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set-up?

Althoughthefirstrauschstoodmorallyhighabovethesecond,theclimaxoftheintensityisindeedincreasing.Thisistobeunderstoodmoreorlessinthefollowingway:thefirstintoxicationloosenedandluredthethingsoutoftheircustomaryworldwhilethesecondrauschsoonplacedtheminanewoneextensivelyunderlyingthisinterstice.

Concerningthecontinuousdigressionsinhashish.Firstofall,theinabilitytolisten.Howeverdisproportionatethisseemsinrelationtothatboundlessbenevolencetowardsothers,itisnonethelessactuallyrootedinit.Beforeone's[conversation]partnerhasbarelyopenedhismouth,hedisappointsusimmensely.Whathesayslagsendlesslyfarbehindwhatwewouldsogladlyhavecreditedhimwithandbelievedhimcapableofhadheremainedsilent.Hedisappointsuspainfullyinhisunresponsiveattitudetowardsthatgreatestobjectofallattention:ourselves.

Asforourowndistracted,abruptswitchfromthesubjectunderdiscussion,thefeelingthatcorrespondstothephysicalinterruptionofcontactcanbeexplainedthus:weareendlesslyalluredwithwhateverwearedirectlyengagedindiscussing;wefondlystretchoutourarmstowardswhateverwehaveavaguenotionof.Barelyhavewetouchedit,however,thanitdisappointsuscorporeally:theobjectofourattentionwithersawayunderthetouchoflanguage.Itagesinyears,ourlovehascompletelyexhausteditinasingleinstant.Thusdoesitrestunt

ilitseemstobecomealluringenoughtoleadusbacktoit.Toreturntothecolportagephenomenonoftheroom:thepossibilityofallthingswhichhavepotentiallytakenplaceinthisroomisperceivedsimultaneously.Theroomwinksatone:so,whatmayhavehappenedtome?Theconnectionofthisphenomenontothecolportage.Colportageandcaption.Tovisualizeitthus:onepicturestooneselfakitschychromolithographonthewallwithalongishstripcarvedoutofthelowerpartoftheframe.Aribbonrunsalongthislowerpartandnowcaptionsalternatingwithoneanotherappearintheniche:"MurderofEgmont","ImperialCoronationofCharlemagne"etc.

InourexperimentIrepeatedlysawporticoswithorielwindowsandoncesaid:IseeVenice,butitlooksliketheupperpartoftheKurfurstenstrae.

"Ifeelweak"and"Iknowmyselfweak"--thosearetworadicallydifferentintentions.Perhapsthefirstonealonereallycarriesthepunch.Butonhashishonecantalkalmostexclusivelyabouttheruleofthesecondandperhapsthatexplainswhythefacialexpressionisimpoverished,despitetheintensified"innerlife".Thedifferencebetweenthesetwointentionsistobeinvestigated.

Further:functionshift[Funktionsverschiebung].ItakethistermfromJol.Thefollowingexperiencesuggestedittome.DuringthesatanicphaseIwashandedabookbyKafka.ThetitlereadBetrachtung[Meditation].[5]Butthenallatoncethisbookmeanttomewhatabookinapoet'shandsmeanstoasomewhatacademicsculptorwhohastosculptastatueofthispoet.Itwasimmediatelydovetailedbymyselfintothesculpturalconstructionofmypersonandwasconsequentlys

ubjecttomeinamuchmorebrutalandabsolutemannerthancouldhavebeenaccomplishedbythemostwitheringcritique.

Buttherewasstillsomethingelse:namely,itwasasifIwereinflightfromKafka'sspiritandnowinthemomentwhenhehadtouchedme,IweremetamorphisizedintostoneasDaphnewaschangedintoivyunderApollo'stouch.

Connectionofthecolportage-intentionwiththemostprofoundlytheological.Itreflectsitopaquely,displacingtothespaceofcontemplationwhatisintendedonlyinthespaceofdailylife.Namely:timeandagaintheworldisthesame(t


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hateverythingwhichhaseverhappenedcouldhavebeenenactedinthesameroom).Inatheoreticalsense,thatisatired,witheredtruth,despitealltheinsightconcealedinit,whichnonethelessfindsitsgreatestconfirmationintheexistenceofthedevout,towhom,ashere,thespaceofimaginationservesasallthathasbeen,andthusallthingsservetothebest.Thetheologicalissodeeplysunkenintherealmofcolportagethatonemaysay:theprofoundesttruths,aspiredtofarawayfromtheoppressive,animaltruthsofmen,stillpossesstheviolentforcecapableofadaptingthemselvestotheoppressiveandthecommon,toevenmirrorthemselvesintheirownwayinirresponsibledreams.

ErnstBloch:ProtocoloftheSameExperiment

Ieatnothing.Energyofthesilenceremains.Energyfromfastingislostwhenoneissated.

TherauschtodaycomparestothepreviousoneasCalvintoShakespeare.ThisisaCalvinistrausch.

NowIaminastateofindolent,sinkinglonging.Itisalwaysjustsuchanambiguouswinkingofnirvanaacrosstheway.Allegoryofpeace,arcadiarisesoppressivelytothesurface.ThatisallthatremainedofAriel.That'sthepurestmea

sureoftherelationbetweenthisrauschandthefirst.WhenevenI,towhomthingsaregoinginaworldlyway,goingbadly(depressed),sensethiswinking,thenseewhatpowerithas.Yes,itisthesmile.ThesmileistheveiledimageofSais.[6]

It'snowasifsomethinghadtakenmebythehandtothesoughtaftercleftintherocks.Butthattoobecomesjustarained-outrendezvouswiththespirits.Arained-outVenicesimilartotheKurfrstenstrae.ButatthesametimeIenjoythisrain-ladenhumor;lookdownfromthewindowwiththepipe.Italkwithintentionofsayingsomethingflorid;theymustbesuspicious.

Itisasifthewordsweresuggestedtoonephonetically.Thereisautomaticsig

naling[Selbstanschlu]here.Thingshavetheirsaywithoutaskingforpermission.Thatascendsintoveryhighspheres.Thereisasilentpasswordwithwhichcertainthingsnowpassthroughthegate.

Thedepressivemoodnonethelessbecomesmoreabsorbing.Fearofitgoingawayandbeingabsorbedwithitaresimultaneous.Amonlycapableofretainingtheemotionalatmosphereofthedepression,notitscontents.

Againapowerfulfeelingofbeingatsea.Thephase-like=seavoyage,lifeinthecabin:itisperfectlyclear,itistheworldseenthroughglass.Awebnowfashionsitself,everythingjoinsforceswiththeblackbackgroundasinbadengravings.Hashishinterweavestheentirespace.

Pause(ItakeKafka'sBetrachtung[Meditation]assupport).Benj[amin]:"That'stherightsupport"--Myself:"Youcouldn'tfindonemorerefined."Benj[amin]:"Nonemorewell-informed".

Stairwayinthestudio:astructureonlyfitforwaxfigurestoinhabit.

ThereuponIbeginsomuchgraphically.AllofPiscatorcanpackupandgo.Havethepossibilityofrearrangingtheentirelightingwithtinylittlelever.CanmakeouttheLondonOperafromtheGoethehaus.Canreadallofhistoryoutofit.Itappearstomeintheroom,andthat'swhyIfocusonthecolportageimages.


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Canseeeverythingintheroom;thesonsofRichardIIIandwhateveryouplease.

Inaddition,thingsparticipateinmydepression=devaluationoftheirmatter.Theybecomemannequins.Unattireddress-uppuppetsawaitingmyintention,standingaboutnaked,everythingabouttheminstructivelikeananatomicalmodel.No,it'sthis:theystandtherewithoutanaura.Throughmysmile.Throughmysmileallthingsstandunderglass.

Nowapassageemergesbetweentheeaselandstairsthroughwhichthebreathofdeathgentlycaresses.Thedeathwhichisbetweenmeandtherausch.Itformsasnow-coveredpathleadingintotherauschbeyond.Thispathisdeath.

ToFrnkel,whocomesdownthestairs:Youhaveturnedintoalady.Youalwayswindupwithafrockbetweenyourfeet,likewebs.

WhenW[alter]B[enjamin]wasurged:"No,Idon'twantanything.Evenifyouhavetoreprimandmeiniambs[sichzudiesemZweckJambenvorbinden],Iwon'teatanything."

Attheend:stepoutsideintoaMayeveningfrommycastleinParma.Walksogently,sosoftly,thegroundissilk.

Tome:(inparting)Stayidenticalforawhileyet!

Postscript:WhenDr.Frnkelwantedtowritesomethingdown:"Ah,nowI'mcomingintothepalacegardensagain,wheremyeverystepisrecorded."

WalterBenjamin:Bloch'sProtocoltotheExperimentof14January1928

Thesequentialorderisloose[frei,free].

[Trans.note---PassageswhichrepeatBloch'sprotocolverbatim(seeabove)havenotbeenincludedhere.]

LikewisetoFrnkel:Nowthatyou'vesteppedoutside,thestreetintercedesonyourbehalf.Youcomebackentirelytransformed.

AtanymomentnowI'llbeknockingontheceilingwhichisterriblythin.

Inotherwords,animpetustowakefulness.

Falldownthestepsagain;fanciful[lustvoll].Itbeginstogetlightoutside.

NowIluckilyhaveeverythingbutwhattheservantgirlsbuyfor25pfennigsinanEgyptiandreambook.

Deathaszonewhichsurroundstherausch.

Stateofinnerlistlessness.

NowIamnotgoingthroughanAfricanphase,butratheraCelticone.It'sgettingprogressivelybrighter.

GiventheopportunitytosaywhatIhadelaboratedonearlier:"NowIamtheschooledteacher".

Somethingorother"spillsoverthedepressivestate"(theoppositeofaufheben


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[7]:bersplen[tospillorwashover].

Henceitcanbeseenpreciselywhatoneislackinginordertobehappy.

Thatisthesadevidence.Indeed,itisquitecomical.Dyinghasanentirelydifferentimperativethanitdidthefirsttime.

Exhalationsfromtheearth.Intermediatestep.Illuminationoftherausch.

Morechthonic.Sawaflightofstepsleadingdowntous,sothatweweretoacertainextentsittingunderground

ProtocolIII:WalterBenjamin:ProtocoloftheHashishExperimentof11May1928

V.P.[Versuchsperson,TestSubject]:Jol

At[...]o'clock,Jolingested[...]g[rams]ofCannabisind[icae].

J[ol]showedupatBenjamin'saround10:30.Afterhavingtakenthedosageearlier,hehadledameetingintheHouseofPublicHealth[Gesundheitshaus]andhadtakenpartinthediscussionwithoutanyhindrance.Astherewasstillnovisibleeffectby11o'clock,theoutcomeoftheexperimentpromisedtobequiteneglig

ible.Thoughtohimselfheseemstohavechanged,thisisnotapparenttotheobserver.TheconversationwasinitiatedbyB[enjamin]'sworks,andturnedofitsownaccordtoquestionsofaneroticnature,viz.sexual-pathologicaldocuments(fromthecollectionofMagnusHirschfeld).Benjaminplacedanalbumwithexplicitillustrationsinfrontofthetestsubject.Effect:nil.Theconversationremainspurelyscientific.

However,curiousmimeticanticipations,so-to-speak,occurtoB[enjamin],whofrequentlylosesthethreadoftheconversation,unlikeJ[ol],andoffersalightwhenJ[ol]reachesforabiscuit.

After11o'clock,acallfromFrnkel,whopromisestocome.Thisconversationstrikestheobserverasitselfthetriggeringfactorofthehashishrausch.First(

moderate)attackoflaughteronthetelephone.Afterconversationended,strongimpressionoftheroom,towhichitshouldbenoted:thetelephoneisnotlocatedinB[enjamin]'sroom,butintheadjacentflat;toreachtheroominquestion,onemustpassthroughathirdroom.J[ol]wishestoremainintheroomwherehemadethephonecall,butisveryunsure.Hedoesn'tventuretorestagainstapillowinthecornerofthesofabuttakesupapositioninthemiddleofit.

[His]powerofobservationhadalreadyintensified(relativetoB[enjamin]'smorenormalone,whichistheonlystandardofcomparisoninthiscase)beforepassingthroughthemiddleroom.Thishallwayisfilledwithframedspecimensofhandwriting.J[ol]atoncediscoversachartwhichisdiscernibleashavingtodowithacollectiondocumentingthehistoryofwrittencharacters.B[enjamin]hasnevernoticedthischart.Moreastonishingyet,onthewaybackthroughthisroom:

aviolet-coloredballoonistiedtothebackofachair.B[enjamin]doesn'tseeitatall.J[ol]isstartled.ThesourceoflightinfrontoftheballoonappearstoJ[ol]secretlyasanultravioletlamp,whichhecalls"apparatus".

WiththetransitiontothenewmilieuinB[enjamin]'sroom,thereisatonceacompletedisorientationofthesenseoftime.Thetenminuteswhichhaveelapsedsincethetelephoneconversationseemtohimlikehalfanhour.ThefollowingperiodischaracterizedbyarestlessanticipationofFrnkel.Thephasesareoutwardlyrecognizablebyrepeateddeepbreaths.DiscussionofJ[ol]'sformulation:"I'vemiscalculatedthetime."Otherformulations:"Mywatchisrunningbackwards,"


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"Iwouldliketostandinbetweenthedouble-glazing[ofthewindowpane],""Frnkelcouldinfactbegraduallyabouttoappearnow."Standingatthewindow,J[ol]seestwocyclists:"Hecannotcomebybicycle,tobesure.Letalonebytwos!"

Lateron,aphaseofdeepabsorptioninthoughtofwhichbutafewisolateddetailsherecanberetained.Divagationontheword"Kollege"[colleague].Etymologicalconsiderations.B[enjamin]findsthisquiteremarkable,forhehadquietlyponderedovertheetymologyofthiswordeighthoursearlierthesameday.HeattemptstocommunicatethattoJ[ol].Thelattersternlyrefuses:"Icannotstandthesemediumistic[mediumistisch]conversationsamongintellectuals."

OtherformulationswhosecontextIcannolongerreconstruct:"ShallIinthemeantimetalkmalthusianistically[malthusianistisch]?""Everymotherwith5childrencansaythat."(Thatcanbesaidofeverymotherwith5children?)["Opponenz""Alimentenz"]Divagationon"wildmen""symmetryofloutishmen".(RelatedperhapstothetitleliketheoneintheVossischeZeitung)[8].NewdivagationsonanintermediatethingbetweenKaiserandKautsky".(AimedatB[enjamin]).

"Alwaysahousewithlinesinsuchamannerandcandlestickshapes(deepsigh).Candlestickshapesimmediatelyremindmeofsomethingsexual.Mustbesomethingsexualforthesakeofappearances."Theword"secretorium"[Sekretorium]arisesinthiscontext.AssoonasIconfirmasentenceofhis,heperksupinamorelucidphase,tojudgefromhiswords."I'vejustcomeupwiththelift."Otherreflections:"Ionlyknowthatwhichisentirelyformal...andnoteventhatanymo

re."Or:"AsIsaidthat,Iwasthechurch."Or:"Nowthatwasreallysomething...AchGott,butofcoursethoseareimpersonationsofaninferiorkind."Or:"Oneseesthegoldnuggetslyingthere,butonecan'tliftthem."[He]holdsforthatlengthnowonliftingandseeingastwototallydifferentactions,asifheweremakingadiscovery.

Whentheopportunityarises,B[enjamin]isemboldenedtoremarkthatnosolutiontocontactbetweenhimselfandJ[ol]hashappened.J[ol]reactsinanextraordinarilyvehementmanner:solutiontocontact[Kontaktlsung]saidtobeacontradictioinadjecto.Thenecholalia(perceiving[perzipierend]?):"Contact,out-tact,bytact,withtactinSpain"["Kontakt,Austakt,durchTakt,mitTaktinSpanien"].Thisisadivagationfromanearlierstageoftheexperiment.Otherdivagations:B[enjamin]letsdroptheword"parallels",towhichthereisareaction:"par

allelsintersectininfinity--surelyonecanseethat."--Thenlivelydoubt,whethertheyintersectornot.

Fragment:"...Bymeansofthisthing,whichinfactshouldbeameasure,orwas,searchme."Otherdeviations:"Idon'tbelieveitforamomentthatyou'reattemptingtomakejokes.You'retoounsureofyourselfforthat."

AfteraperiodoftimehaselapsedIwithdrawintothebackgroundoftheroomontothecouchnexttoFrnkel.J[ol]hasagreatlikingforthisarrangement.F[rnkel]isnotwell,hestandsup,andIaccompanyhimout.Heisgoneforalongtime.Inhisabsence:firstJ[ol]assumedthatweweretalkingoutsideaboutexperimentalprocedures.Buthedropsit.Hearsarattling.Associatesthiswiththelightingofacandlestick.BelievesthathesawhowIguidedFrnkeltothetoiletwi

thacandlestick.Hereuponimmediatelyfollowstillfairlyobjectivediscussions.Gradualelucidaton.

Supplementaryentryfromthedeepestphase:acornerofmydeskbecomesforJ[ol]anavalstation,coaling-station,somethingsituatedbetweenWittenbergandJterbog.[9]"ButallofitatthetimeofWaldersee."[10]Afterthat,therewasaveryremarkable,beautifullypoeticdivagationaboutimaginedschooldaysinMyslowitz.Afternoonintheschool,outsideinthefields[and]sun,etc.Thenheloseshimselfinotherimages:Berlin."OnemusttraveltotheOrienttounderstandAckerstrae."


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FromthephaseofanticipatingFrnkel'sarrival:"NowI'dliketositonthewindow-sill."Afterwardsalongdivagationontheword"threaten"[drohen]."Frnkelthreatenstocome".J[ol]himselfalsocallsattentiontoanotherinfantilism.OnoccasionhehasthefeelingthatF[rnkel]willbreakapromisehehasmade,nomatterwhichone.Heistohave"shakenhandsonit(asboystendtodo)."Endoftheexperimentaround3o'clock.

ErnstJol:ProtocoltotheSameExperiment

AnticipatingFrnkel:

Havingtelephoned,onecouldexpectF[rnkel]inabout20-30minutes.Weleftthetelephoneroomthroughthehallwaywiththedevelopmentofhandwriting.Achild'sblueballoonwasfastenedtothebackofachairatatablewherealampstood.Tome,thelayoutappearedinstantlyreversedtotheextentthattheballoonwasinfrontofthelampwhichshonethroughit,illuminatingtheroomwithabluelight,likeaSolluxlampe[radiationlamp].Igavetheballoonthename"apparatus".

ReturningtoB[enjamin]'sroom,thetensionofanticipationincreasesattimestoanagonizingintensity.Inthiscontexttherewereconsiderablemiscalculation

softimesoimpressivethat,foramoment,Ibelievedmywatchwasrunningbackwards.Theotherthings(thedouble-glazing,thecyclist)aredescribedintheprotocol.[11]What'speculiaristheintensificationwhichisimpliedfirstinthementionofthedouble-glazedwindow,thenin[thementionof]theoutermetalsill.

Somekindofinfantilefeaturesareatplaywiththemetalsill.Forexample,itwascleartomethatinthissituationIwouldonlytakeupalittlespaceonthesill,i.e.,thatIwasasmallboy.

AtonetimewhenIsaid"space"["Raum"]forouterspace[Weltenraum],Ibelieved[myself]tosaysomethingnewstylisticallyinsofarasthesemanticcharacterofthethingwereintensifiedbygrammaticalincoherence.IwonderedwhetherM

orgenstern,forexample,wouldhavehadamuchmorepowerfulimpacthadhecarriedthegrotesquenessofhisPalmstrm[12]poemsoverintohiscosmicpoetry.

Nodoubt,myformulationsseemedtoodaringtome,forthemostpart,butnonethelessquitepertinent,andtheydisclosedtomesomerareperspectives.Mydoubt,however,wasapparentasanalmostconstantfactorinmyquestionsregardingthesurroundings;whethermyremarksstooduptoobjectivecriticism.

Vodka:

IhadthefeelingofhavingtoentertainF[rnkel]somewhat,andit'scertainlyno

accidentthatIdirectedhimtothevariousliqueurswhich,forreasonsofabstinence,wereoutofthequestionforme,personally,andwhichwereirrelevanttomyhunger.It'sworthnotingthatIbecamesocaptivatedbyabottlelabeledasvodkathatIwantedtotestitsauthenticity,whichIdoubted.SincetheTreatyofVersailleshadforbiddentheproductionofcognacinGermany,IbelievedthattheTreatyofRapallohadallowedtheRussianstokeeptheirvodka,anditgavemethegreatestpleasuretoseethatthegreatconventionsandtreatiesofthenationswereessentiallymattersregardingtheregulationofspirits.Contributingtothiswasthefactthat,eitherthisvisitortheonebefore,BenjaminhadgivenmesomegenuineRussiancigarettes.


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IsometimeshadthefeelingthatIshouldmediatebetweenB[enjamin]andF[rnkel],althoughIwasn'tawareofanykindofconflict.

TheMedals:

Frnkelgavemeashallowcardboardboxhalf-filledwithginger.AtthesametimeB[enjamin]handedmealittleovalbowlwithbiscuits.Itookbothofthem,feelingasifIwerebeingpaidtribute.Thenbothobjectsremindedmeofmedals,especiallythebowl(whichcouldbecomparedtotoalargebadgeforthewounded-in-action).F[rnkel]andB[enjamin]seemedtomelikeprisoners,whovoluntarilysurrendertheirmedalsassouvenirs(astheEnglishdidwhencaptured).Theremarkablethingwasthatbothofthemlosttheirindividualityatthatmomentandwereonlygeneric,sotospeak,thoughtheirpresenceassuchwasextraordinarilyclear.Itwassomethinghumiliated,slavish.

Allofthesethingscondensedintosomethinglikepermanentrealities.

Asinotherexperiments,therewere,ofcourse,momentsoffleetingapparitions,buttheywereinstantlydivestedofanysemblanceofreality,whichdidnotintheleastspoiltheirrelativewealthandtremendousliveliness.

TheChurch:

AtsometimeorotherallthefoodIhadinmyhandswastakenawayfromme.ThenIrecalledthatapackageofbiscuitswaslyingsomewhathiddentotherightofmyeasychair.Ireachedintoitcontentedlyandinsodoingexperiencedsucharemarkablecrisscrossofemotionsofmartyrdomandwell-beingthatIsaid:"NowIamthechurch."AssoonasIhadexpressedthat,Ifeltlikeafat,priestlyprebendarysittinginmyeasy-chair,butwithanexpressionofgreatearnestness,almostsadness.

TheCoaling-station:

Adishofcakewastakenawayfromme.IthoughtthatitwouldbeputbackontheprojectingedgeofthedeskwhereB[enjamin]wassitting,butitwassetdownonthetableoutofmyreachwhereF[rnkel]wassitting.TheedgeofthedeskwhichIhadhopedforasasuitabledepot,myarmy'sbasesotospeak,becameformeacape.Thecoursewhichthedishhadtraversedfrommyhandstothecapeandfromthecapetothetablelyinginthedarklikeadarkcontinentwaslikethecurveofsteamshiplinesonthemapofagreattransoceanicshippingfirm.Animportantstrategicpoint,acoaling-station,hadbeentakenawayfromme,andnowIheldforthontheimportanceofsaidcoaling-station,fulminatingwiththepoliticsofalittlebourgeoisschooledonlocaladvertising.Iwasremindedofmy

classmateThiele,whoonceloudlyinterruptedalessoninschool:"Wheredoesthemiddle-classcomein?".IntheAnhalterstraeonthewayhomeafterschooloneday,hehadsaidofsomepoliticalpersonality,IthinkitwasthePresidentofVenezuela,thatheshouldbemadeaheadshorter,akindofterminologywhichwasnewtomethen,andwhichIhadheardwithamixtureoffascinationandobjection.Thetopographicaldistributionofstagesofdevelopmentbecameclearinthiscontext,totheextentthatIexperiencedthemeaningofthecoaling-stationinachildhoodmilieuontheonehand,butthenalsoasaconversationonapassengertrainnearJterbog.(ComparethistoMyslowitz,whereashiftbackintothepasteithervieswithorcombineswithgeographicalremoteness.)


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InMyslowitz:

B[enjamin],whowassittingonlyabouttwostepsawaymostofthetime,lookedverydifferentinappearanceduringtheexperiment.Forexample,theformandfullnessofhisfacechanged.Thecutofhishair,hiseye-glassesmadehimfirststern,thengenial.DuringtheexperimentIknewthat,objectivelyspeaking,hecouldn'tchangesoquickly,buttheimpressionatthetimewassostrongthatitwasconsideredthecorrectone.

OncehewasaGymnasiumstudentinalittleeasterntown.Hehadahandsomecultivatedstudy.Iaskedmyself:wherehasthisyoungmanacquiredsomuchculture?Whatishisfather'soccupation?Draperorgrainagent?AtthismomentheseemedinattentivetomeandIbidhimtorecite.HisattemptatrecitationseemedveryslowtomeandIcalledhimtoaccount.AtthismomentIsawasummerafternooninthelittleeasterntown,veryhot,thesunrestingonthefieldsbeforethetown;andafternoonintheGymnasium--asignofthesmalltownorofthepast:sciencelessonintheafternoon.Saidtheteacher:"So,pleasehurryup,wereallydonothavemuchtimehere."Ihadtolaugh,forinfactthishotsummerafternoonseemedpredestinedfornothingbuttime,andIcouldcalltomindnothingthatwouldseemtotakeprecedenceateitherthishourorinMyslowitz,forthatmatter.

IbelieveIthentoldfurtherhowtheGymnasiumstudentsimitatetheirteachers,exaggeratingextravagantlywiththeGermanstudents'unassumingtalentforcaricature:"...Ireallydon'thaveanytime."

FrnkelisledoutbyBenj[amin]

WhenthishappenedIassumedthatbothofthemwereinthehallwayorinthetelephoneroomdiscussingtheexperiment.Thisbecameexaggeratedatonce:theyweretalkingaboutme,mycharacterinparticular.ThenIheardfootstepsrecedingandasoftclinking.NowIsawhowB[enjamin],holdingacandlestickwithaburn

ingcandleinhishand,accompaniedF[rnkel],leadinghimtothedoorofatoiletandthenhandinghimthecandlestick.

Thisrepresentationofthescenewassomethingcompletelywithoutrestraintandnaturaltome.IfI'mnotmistaken,Iwasautomaticallyremindedthatwearenolongerlivingintheageofcandlesticks.TheinterestingthingwasthatF[rnkel]inparticularcouldn'tatallimaginethatthescenehadactuallytakenplace20yearsearlier,justasIhadseenit.[13]FromthisinsufficiencyofmemoryImostclearlysawthegreateffectofthehashishwithregardtotherecapturingoftime.IsawbeforemyeyesalittlebracketholdingawhitecandlestickinsidetheW.C.Inwell-kepthouseholds,matcheswouldneverbelacking,etc.

WhileF[rnkel]wasoutsideIhadallkindsofpeculiarfearsandIaskedB[enjami

n]whethertherewereanycauseforconcernabouthim.ThissceneremindedmequiteabitofanintermezzoinWiesbaden,whereIhadalreadybeenforcedtoconsidertransportationtothehospitalandsoon.(Comparethiswiththeexperimentinquestion).[14].

PartandOpposite[TeilundGegenteil]:

Inthisrauschaprominentpartwasplayedbythetoandfroofcomprehension,t


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hedoubtbetweenmeaningandmeaninglessness,thebanalandthesignificant.Isaidthatinordinarylifedoubtislessdefined,dullerandmoreshadowy,whereasherepartandoppositepresentthemselveswithequallysharpdefinitionandviewithoneanothertothepointofbeingpainful.ThisbecameapparenttomeintheimageofthetwosailsontheWannsee.Itwouldbefalsetoask:whichisthecorrectone.Thisimageisworthnotingbecausethereisnocontradictionbetweenthetwosails,andonlythemeaningwhichoneattributestoeachofthemcouldconstitutethecontradiction.Seeninsuchawayfromthedistance,twoenemyshipsnavigatingtowardsoneanotherwithouttheirflagshoistedcouldbetakenasallies.Inthisimageitbecomesclearthattheflag-character,thesignorinsigniaisactuallywhatissignificanthereandthisobservationleadsustothefollowing:thatwithintherauschemphasisisuniversallydistributed,asisneverthecaseotherwise.Theexternalizationofthepersonality(spokenofinverygeneralterms)makesonecapableofanexpansionofpartisanshipsuchasonewouldhavetoattributetoadivinebeing,ortoanimpartialitysuchasischaracteristicof,say,ananimal.IfIamnotmistaken,B[enjamin]spokeofan"agreement"[Vereinbarung],anexpressionwhichwasquiteevidenttome.

Ifurthertriedtoshowhowthatdeeperkindofidentificationisattainedthroughcunning.Namely,thatbymeansofmistakenidentities(possiblyexplainedinthephysiologicaltermsofthesenses,whicharecorrectedatonce),affinitiesandidentities,thelastingrewardofthiserror,establishaconnectioninadeeperspheretowhichtheerrorwasabridge.(IseejustnowfromF[rnkel'sprotocolthatB[enjamin]hasspokenof"reconcilability"[Vereinbarkeit].[15]

InthiscontextbelongstheturnofphrasetowhichIattachedgreatimportance:"Whatyousayistrue,butIamright."Moreover,itwasquitecleartomethatthis"istrue"wasnocomfortableconcessionbutratheraclearinsightintothecorrectnessofanadoptedviewpoint,furtheremphasizingthattheword"also"intheformulation:"Youareright,butIamrightalso"immediatelymustmaketheentiresensequestionable.

OntheWayHome:

Nighttimearound3a.m.onthewayhome.FirstdimlightontheHansa-shore.Str

ong,exceptionallyblissfulfeelingofcontinuity:theseshoresfurtherdownandtheArnoflowingbetweenthem.ItisthesamewateronlyhereitiscalledSpree.

Aftertheacutestateofrausch,withitsisolationsandrestrictions,itispossiblethatthereisasenseofhavingastrongerbondwithworldandhumankind.ThisisquiteevidentintheexperimentsoftheRussians.

ProtocolIV:WalterBenjamin:29September1928.Saturday.Marseilles.

Afterlonghesitation,tookhashishat7o'clockintheevening.Duringtheday

IhadbeeninAix.Iamtakingdownnotesofwhatpossiblyfollowsonlytodeterminewhetheritwilltakeeffect,asmysolitarinesshardlyallowsforanyothersupervision.Nexttomeasmallchildiscrying,whodisturbsme.Ithinkthatthreequartersofanhourhavealreadyelapsed.Andyetithasactuallybeenonlyhalfanhour.Thus...apartfromaverymildabsent-mindedness,nothing'shappening.Ilayuponthebed,readandsmoked.AllthewhileoppositemethisglimpseoftheventreofMarseilles.(Nowtheimagesbegintotakeholdofme.)ThestreetthatI'dsooftenseenislikeanincisioncutbyaknife.

CertainpagesinStepppenwolf,whichIreadearlythismorning,wereafinalimp


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etustotakehashish.

Idefinitelyfeeltheeffectsnow.Essentiallynegative,inthatreadingandwritingaredifficultforme.Agoodthreequartersofanhourhastranspired.No,itseemsthatmuchjustwon'tcome.

Justnowthetelegramfrom[Wilhelm]Speyerwouldhavetocome:"Workonnovelfinallygivenup"etc.Itdoesonenogoodif,inspiteofeverything,disappointingnewsrainsontheparadeoftheoncomingRausch.Butisitreallyonlythissort?ForamomenttherewassuspenseasIthought,now[Marcel]Brioniscomingup.Iwasintenselyexcited.

(Postscriptduringdictation:Thingshappenedinthefollowingway:

Ilayuponthebedreallywiththeabsolutecertaintythat,inthiscityofhundredsofthousands,whereonlyonepersonknewme,Iwouldnotbedisturbed,whentherewasaknockatthedoor.Thathadneverhappenedtomehereatall.NordidImakeanymovewhatsoevertoopenit,butinquiredaboutthematterwithoutalteringmypositionintheleast.Thevalet:"Ilyaunmonsieur,quivoudraitvousparler."--"Faiteslemonter."

["Agentlemanwishestospeaktoyou."--"Lethimcomeup."].Istoodleaningagainstthebedposts,myheartpalpitating.Really,itwouldhavebeenquiteremarkabletoseeBrionshowupnow."Lemonsieur",however,wasthedispatchcourier

.)Thefollowingwrittenthenextmorning.Underthoroughlymagnificent,mildafter-effectswhichgivemethelightheartednessnottopaystrictattentiontothesequence.Ofcourse,Briondidn'tcome.Ifinallyleftthehotel,foritseemedtomethatnoeffectswereapparentorelsetheyweresoweakastooverruletheprecautionofstayinginmyroom.Firststation,thecafatthecornerofCannebireandCoursBelsunce.Viewedfromtheharbor,theoneontherightandnotmyusualone.Nowwhat?Onlythatsurebenevolence,theanticipationofseeingpeopleamiablydisposedtowardsone.Thefeelingoflonelinessquicklyvanishes.Mywalkingstickbecomesespeciallydelightfultome.Thehandleofacoffeepotsuddenlylooksverylargeandremainsso.(Onebecomessosensitive:afraidofbeinghurtbyashadowfallingacrosspaper.--Disgustdisappears.Onereadstheslate

onthepissoir.)Iwouldn'tbesurprisedifMr.So-and-socameuptome.Thathedoesn'tdosodoesnotmattertome,either.Butit'stooloudformethere.

Nowthedemandswhichthehashisheatermakesontimeandspacecomeintoplay.Theyare,asiswell-known,absolutelyregal.Versaillesisnottoogreatforonewhohaseatenhashishnoreternitytoolong-lasting.Andinthebackgroundoftheseimmensedimensionsoftheinneradventure,ofabsolutedurationandtheimmeasurablespatialrealm,awonderful,blessedhumornowlingersallthemoreagreeablywiththecontingenciesofthespatio-temporalworld.IamendlesslyawareofthishumorwhenIfindoutthatthekitchenatBasso'sandtheentireupstairshavejustclosedtheverymomentI'vesatdowntotuckineternity.Allthesame,thefeelingafterwardsthatallthisindeedremainsforever,constant,litup,well-patronizedandfulloflife.PresentlyImustnotehowIhappenedtof

indaseatatBasso's.TomeitwasamatteroftheviewoftheOldPortwhichonehadfromtheupperstorey.AsIwaspassingbybelowIspiedanunoccupiedtableonthebalconyofthesecondfloor.Intheend,however,Ionlygotasfarasthefirst.Mostofthetablesbywindowswereoccupied.SoIwalkedovertoquitealargeonewhichseemedtohavejustbecomefree.ThemomentIsatdown,though,thedisproportionbecameapparenttome:disgracefultoseatmyselfthiswayatsuchalargetable,soIwalkedonthroughthewholefloortowardstheoppositeendtotakeaseatatasmallertablewhichhadjustthenbecomevisible.

Butthemealwaslater.First,thelittlebarontheport.Iwasagainontheve


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rgeofmakingaconfusedretreat,forIheardaconcert,what'smoreabrasssection,comingfromthatdirection.Iwasjustbarelyabletoaccountforitasnothingmorethanahonkingcarhorn.Onthewaytothevieuxport[OldPort],alreadythiswonderfullightnessanddeterminationinmystride,whichturnedthestony,irregularpavementofthelargepublicsquareIcrossedintothedirtofacountryroadwhichI,briskwanderer,traveledbynight.ForIstillavoidedtheCannebireatthistime,notbeingcertainofmyregularfunctions.

InthatlittleportbarthehashishbegantoallowitstrulycanonicalmagicfreereignwithaprimitiveacuitywhichIhadhardlyexperiencedbefore.Namely,itbegantomakemeaphysiognomist,atanyrateanobserverofphysiognomies,andIwitnessedsomethingquiteuniqueinmyexperience:Ibecamedeadsetontheformsinthefacesaroundme,whichwerepartlyofaremarkablerawnessandugliness;faceswhichIgenerallywouldhaveavoidedfortworeasons:neitherwouldIhavewishedtodrawtheirattentiontomyself,norwouldIhavebeenabletobeartheirbrutality.Itwasaseeminglyadvancedoutpost,thisporttavern.Itwastheonefurthestinthatdirectionwhichwasstillaccessiblewithoutputtingmeindanger,andhereinmyrauschIhadassesseditwiththesamecertaintywithwhichadeeplyexhaustedpersonunderstandshowtofillaglasstotheverybrimwithoutspillingadrop,whereasapersonwithrefreshedsenseswouldneverbeinapositiontodoso.ItwasstillfarenoughawayfromtherueBouterie,andyetnobourgeoisweresittingthere.Atbesttherewereapairofpetitbourgeoisfamiliesfromtheneighborhoodsittingnexttosomeoftheauthenticharborproletariat.Inowgraspedallatoncehowtoapainter--hasitnothappened

toRembrandtandmanyothers?--uglinessisthetruereservoirofbeauty,betterthanthereceptaclesofitstreasure;justasthejaggedmountainchaincouldappearwithalltheinteriorGoldoftheBeautifulsparklingfromitsfoldedstrata,vistasandranges.Iparticularlyrecallaninfinitelybestialandvulgarfaceofoneofthemen,fromwhichthe"wrinklesofabandon"suddenlystruckme.Itwasmen'sfaceswhichappealedtomemost.Andnow,too,Ibeganthelongsustainedgameinwhichanacquaintancesurfacedupinfrontofmeineachnewface.OftenIknewhisname,oftenagainnot.Thedeceptionvanishedasdeceptionsindreamsvanish,thatis,notinshameandwithoneselfcompromised,butratheruntroubledandfriendlylikeabeingwhichhasperformeditsobligation.Underthesecircumstancestherecouldbenotalkofloneliness;wasImyowncompanionship?Thatcertainly,thoughnotquitesoconspicuously.NordoIknowifthatwouldhaveparticularlypleasedme.This,onthecontrary,wasnodoubtmorelikely

:Ibecamemyownshrewdest,mostsensitive,mostshamelesspander,andprocuredformyselfwiththeambiguouscertaintyofonewhoisintimatelyacquaintedwithandhasstudiedthedesiresofhiscustomer.Thenitbegantotakehalfaneternityuntilthewaiterappeared.Rather,Icouldn'twaitforhimtoappear.Iwalkedintothebarroomandleftthemoneyonthetable.Whethertipsarecustomaryinsuchatavern,Idon'tknow.Iwouldhaveleftsomethinginanycase,though,otherwise.UnderhashishyesterdayIwasstingier;itwasn'tuntilIgrewfearfulthatmyextravaganceswouldattractattentionthatIreallymademyselfconspicuous.

ThesameatBasso's,withtheorder.FirstIorderedadozenoysters.Themanalsowantedtoknowrightthenwhatwastobeorderedforthefollowingcourse.Iindicatedastandardsomethingorother.Thenhereturnedwiththenewsthatthe

ywereoutofthat.SoIlookedoverthemenuattheothercoursesunderthesamesection,seemedabouttoorderonewhenthenameofanotheraboveitcaughtmyeye,untilIhadreachedthetopofthelist.Itwasnotoutofgluttony,though,butratheraquitepronouncedpolitenesstowardstheentrs,whichIdidn'twanttoinsultbydisregardingthem.Inshort,IgotstuckonaptdeLyon.LionptIhought,laughingfacetiouslyasitsatbeforemenicelyonaplate,andthendisdainfully:thisdelicaterabbit--orchickenmeat--whateveritmaybe.Tobesatedonalionwouldnothaveseemedatalloutofproportiontomylionappetite.Besides,itwassecretlyallsettledthatIwouldgotoanotherrestaurantafterI'dfinishedatBasso's(thatwasaround10:30)andhavedinnerasecondtime


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.

First,however,[was]thewaytoBasso's.Iglidedalongthequaysideandreadoneafteranotherthenamesoftheboatsdockedthere.AtthesametimeIwasovercomebyanincomprehensiblecheerfulness,andIsmiledinthefaceofallthefirstnamesofFrancethereinarow.Itseemedtomethatthelovewhichwaspromisedtotheseboatsalongwiththeirnameswaswonderful,beautifulandtouching.OnlyonecalledAeroII,whichremindedmeofaerialwarfare,didIpassoverunaffably,justasI'dbeenforcedtoavertmyglancefromcertainoverlydeformedfacesinthebarwhichI'djustcomefrom.

UpstairsatBasso'sthetrickscommencedforthefirsttimewhenIlookeddown.Thesquareinfrontoftheportwas,toputitbest,likeapaletteonwhichImixedthelocalcolorsatrandom,probingthiswayandthat,irresponsiblyifyouwill,butlikeagreatpainterwhoviewshispaletteasaninstrument.Iwasextremelyreluctanttopartakeofthewine.ItwasahalfbottleofCassis,adrywine.Apieceoficeswamintheglass.Itwas,however,exquisitelycompatiblewithmydrug.IhadchosenmytablebecauseoftheopenwindowthroughwhichIcouldglancedownatthedarksquare.AndwhenIdidsofromtimetotimeithadthetendencytoalteritselfwitheachpersonwhosetfootonit,asifitformedafigure[inrelation]tothepersonwhich,mindyou,hadnothingtodowithhowhesawit,butratherwasclosertotheviewofthegreatportraitistsofthe17thCenturywhocastpersonsoftitleinreliefbypositioningtheminfrontofporticosandwindows.

HereImustmakethisgeneralremark:thesolitarinessofsucharauschhasitsshadowside.Tospeakofthephysicalaspectalone,therewasamomentintheporttavernwhenaseverepressureinmydiaphragmsoughtreleaseinhumming.Furthermore,there'snodoubtthatmanyabeautifulandilluminatingthingremainsdormant.Butontheotherhand,thesolitarinessactsinturnasafilter;whatonewritesdownthenextdayismorethananenumerationofsequentialevents.Inthenighttherauschstandsoutwithprismaticedgesagainsteverydayexperience.Itformsakindoffigureandismorememorablethanusual.Ishouldsay,itcontractsandinsodoingfashionstheformofaflower.

TogetclosertotheriddleofblissinrauschonemustreconsiderAriadne'sthread.Whatdelight[thereis]inthemereactofunwindingaskein.Andthisdeli

ghtisquiteprofoundlyrelatedtothedelightofrausch,asitistothedelightincreativework.Wegoforward:butindoingsonotonlydowediscoverthebendsofthecaverninwhichweventureforth,butratherwesavorthishappinessofdiscoverybyvirtueofthatotherrhythmicalblisswhichcomesfromunravelingaskein.Suchacertaintyfromtheintricatelywoundskeinthatweunravel-isthatnotthehappinessofatleasteveryproseformofproductivity?Andunderhashishweareprosebeingssavoringatthepeakofourpowers.Delaposielyrique--paspourunsou.

Ata[public]squareofftheCannebirewheretherueParadisrunsintopromenades,anall-engrossingsensationofhappinesscameovermewhichishardertogetagraspofthaneverythingpriortothispoint.Fortunately,inmynewspaperIfindthesentence:"Bythespoonfulonemustdrawsameness[dasGleiche]outof

reality".NumerousweekspriortothisI'dreadasentencebyJohannesV.Jensenwhichseemedtosaysomethingsimilar:"Richardwasayoungmanwhohadasenseforeverythingintheworldofthesamekind."Thissentencehadquitepleasedme.Itnowenabledmetoconfrontthepolitical-rationalsensethatithadformewithyesterday'sexperienceofaindividual-magicalone.WhereasJensen'ssentencemeantformethatthingsare,aswecertainlyknow,sothoroughlymechanized[and]rationalizedthatwhatevertodayisparticularlieshiddeninthenuancesonly,theinsightyesterdaywascompletelydifferent,namely,Isawnuancesalone;andtheywerethesame.Ibecameinwardlyengrossedinthepavementinfrontofme.Bymeansofakindofsalve-magicsalve-thatIglosseditoverwith


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,sotospeak,thisverysamepavementcouldhavebeenParisianpavement.Oneoftentalksaboutstonesforbread.Herethesestoneswerethebreadofmyimagination,whichthereuponhadsuddenlybecomevoracioustotastethatsamesomethingofalllocalesandcountries.DuringthisphaseasIsatinthedark,thechairagainstthewallofahouse,therewerefairlyisolatedmomentsof[an]obsessivecharacter[Suchtcharakter].IwasimmenselyproudtothinkofsittinginMarseilleshereonthestreetinahashishrausch;certainlywhoelsesharedmyrauschhere,onthisevening,howfew.AsthoughIwerenotcapableofsensingthedangerofapproachingmisfortuneandloneliness,thehashishwasevertoremain.Inthisthoroughlyintermittentstageanearbynightclub'smusic,whichwasfollowingme,playedanextraordinaryrle.[It]waspeculiarhowmyearmadeapointofnotrecognizing"Valencia"as"Valencia".[Gustav]Glck[16]drovepastmeinataxi.Itwasafleetingmoment.Ithadbeenstrange,justas,earlier,[Erich]Unger[17]hadsuddenlyemergedoutoftheshadowsoftheboatonthequayfromtheformofaharbordeadbeatandpimp.AndwhenIdiscoveredsomesuchliteraryfigureagainatanearbytableatBasso's,IsaidtomyselfthatIhadfinallyfoundoutwhatliteraturewasgoodfor.Buttherewerenotonlyfamiliarfigures.Hereinthestageofthedeepestreverie,twofigures-philistines,vagrants,whoknows-passedbymeas"DanteandPetrarch"."Allmenarebrothers."ThusbeganatrainofthoughtwhichIcannolongerfollow.Butitsfinalsegmentwascertainlymuchlessbanalthanitsfirst,andledperhapsintoanimalimagery.Butthatwasatastageotherthantheoneattheport,fromwhichIfindtheshortnote:"Acquaintancesonlyandbeautiesonly"--namely,thepassers-by.

"Barnabus"stoodonanelectrictramwhichbrieflycametoastopinfrontofthesquarewhereIwassitting.Tome,though,thesadanddesolatestoryofBarnabusseemednobaddestinationforatramoutwardboundforthecitylimitsofMarseilles.Aroundthedoorofadance-hallaverybeautifulscenewastakingplace.EverynowandthenaChinesemaninbluesilkpantsandluminousrose-coloredjacketemerged.Thatwasthedoorman.Girlsmadethemselvesconspicuousinthedoorway.Iwasinaverycontentedmood.Itamusedmetoseeayoungmanwithagirlinawhitedresscomingoutandtojumptotheconclusion:"Shegavehimtheslipinthereinherchemiseandhe'sclaimingherbacktohimagain.That'sit."Thethoughtofsittinghereinacenterofeveryrevelryflatteredme,andby"here"Iwasnotreferringtothecitybuttothelittle,bynomeanseventfulspotwhereIwassitting.ButthemannerinwhichtheeventsoccurredwassuchthattheoutwardappearancetouchedmewithamagicwandandIbecameengulfedi

nadreamaboutit.Atsuchtimespeopleandthingsbehavelikethosestagepropsandmannequinsmadeoutofelderpulpintheglazedtin-foilcrate,whichbecomegalvanizedbyrubbingtheglassandwitheachmovementinvoluntarilyenterintothemostbizarrerelationships.

Themusic,whichmeanwhilecontinuedtoblareandsubside,Icalledthestrawscourgeofjazz.I'veforgottenthereasonswithwhichIpermittedmyselftotapmyfoottothebeat.Thatgoesagainstmyupbringing,anditdidnothappenwithoutinnerconflict.Thereweretimeswhentheintensityoftheacousticimpressionscrowdedoutalltheothers.

Mostofall,itwasthedinofvoices,andnotthestreets,whichdrownedouteverythinginthelittleportbar.Thestrangestthingaboutthisnoiseofvoices

wasthatitsoundedentirelylikedialect.ThepeopleofMarseillessuddenlydidnotspeakagoodenoughFrenchtome,youmightsay.Theyhadstoppedshortatthedialectstage.Thatphenomenonofalienation,whichmaybeimplied,andwhichKraushasformulatedwiththefineadage"Thecloseronelooksataword,thefurtherawayitlooksback"appearstorefertothingshere,too.AtanyrateIfindamongmyentriestheastonishednote:"Howthingsresistone'sglances."

TheeffectsworeoffwhenIcrossedtheCannebireandfinallyturnedthecornertohavejustalittleicecreaminasmallCafdesCoursBelsunce.Itwasnotfarfromthatother,firstcafofthiseveningwherethelover'sblisswhichthecont


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emplationofsomefringerufflinginthewindimpartedsuddenlyconvincedmethatthehashishhadbeguntotakeeffect.AndwhenIrecallthisstate,I'dliketothinkthathashish,inrelationtonature,possessestheforceandpowerofpersuasiontoallowustorecapturethegreatsquanderingofone'sownexistence,whichwesavorwhenwe'reinlove.Forwhenweareinloveforthefirsttimeandourexistenceslipslikegoldcoinsthroughnature'sfingers,whichcannotholdontothemandmustlavishlyspendtheminordertoobtainthenewbeing,thenew-born,then,withouthopingorexpectingathing,sheflingsuswithbothhandsfulltowardexistence.

ProtocolV:

WalterBenjamin:HashishBeginningofMarch1930

Adivided,ambivalentcourseofevents.Apositivum:thepresenceofGert,[18]whothroughapparentlyquiteextensiveexperiencesofthissort(hashishwasobviouslysomethingnewtoher)becameaforceboostingtheeffectsofthetoxin.Justhowmuch,tobediscussedlater.Ontheotherhand,anegativum:insufficienteffectuponherandEgon,dueperhapstotheinferiorqualityofthepreparation,whichwasnotthesameastheoneItook.Notbeingsufficient,Egon'snarrowlodgingswereentirelyinadequateandsuchapoornourishmentformydreamsthatIkeptmyeyesshutforalmosttheentiresession.Thisledtoexperienceswhi

chwerecompletelynewtome.IfcontactwithEgonwasnil,whennotnegative,thencontactwithGerthadtoosensualahuetomakeapurelyfilteredintellectualyieldoftheundertakingpossible.

Nonetheless,IseefromcertainnotesofGertthattherauschwassodeepthatthewordsandimageshavevanishedfrommeataparticularstage.Sincecontactwithotherpeople,moreover,isessentialtoattainintellectuallyandlinguisticallyarticulatedutterances,itcanbeinferredfromtheabovethattheinsightsthistimewereoutofproportiontothedepthoftherauschandtheenjoyment,ifyouwill.Allthemorereasontoemphasizejustwhatitwasthatseemedtobethecoreofthissession,notonlyinGert'snotesbutaccordingtomyownreco

llection.ThesearethepronouncementsImadeaboutthenatureoftheaura.EverythingIsaidthenwaspointedpolemicallyatthetheosophists,whoseinexperienceandignoranceIfoundhighlyobnoxious.Andinoppositiontotheconventional,banalnotionsofthetheosophists,Ipositedthreeaspectsofthegenuineaura,albeitunsystematically.Firstofall,thegenuineauraappearsinallthings,notjustspecificonesaspeopleimagine.Secondly,theaurachangescompletelyandfundamentallywitheachmovementmadebytheobjectwhoseauraitis.Thirdly,thegenuineauracaninnowaybethoughtofastheimmaculate,spiritualisticmagicrayasdepictedanddescribedinvulgar,mysticalbooks.Onthecontrary,thedistinguishingfeatureofthegenuineaurais:theornament,anornamentalperiphery[Umzirkung]inwhichthethingorbeingliesfixed,asifconfinedinasheath.NothingconveysasaccurateaconceptionofthegenuineauraasvanGogh'slatepaintings,whichcouldbedescribedasallthingspaintedwiththeir

accompanyingaura.

Fromanotherphase.FirstexperienceIhadofauditioncolore.IwasnotveryattentivetowhatEgonsaidbecausemyhearingimmediatelyconvertedhiswordsintotheperceptionofcolorful,metallicglitterwhichcoalescedinpatterns.Imadethisunderstandabletohimbycomparingittotheknittingpatternswhichwelovedasthebeautifulcoloredplatesof"HerzblttchensZeitvertreib"[Darling'sDiversions]whenwewerechildren.

EvenmoreremarkableperhapsisalaterphenomenonconnectedtohowGert'svoice


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soundedtome.Thatwasatthemomentwhenshegaveherselfashotofmorphine,andI,nothavinghadanyknowledgeoftheeffectsofthisdrugasidefromwhatI'dreadinbooks,wasabletodescribeherstatetoherinafullypenetratingandaccuratemannerbased--asImyselfmaintained--onherintonation.Otherwise,thisturnofevents--Egon'sandGert'sveeringoffintomorphine--was,toacertainextent,theendoftheexperimentforme;butahighlightaswell,Imustadmit.Itwastheendbecausetheenormoussensitivityevokedbythehashishthreatenedtoturneveryinabilitytobeunderstoodintoasourceofsuffering,whichIsufferedthen,too,since"wehadpartedwaysfromeachother".AtleastthatishowIformulatedit.Itwasahighlightbecauseofthissubduedbutpersistent,sensualrelationtoGertwhichInowfeltasshefiddledwiththesyringe(aninstrumenttowhichIhaveaconsiderableaversion),norcouldIhelpbeinginfluencedbytheblackpyjamasshewore--forthiswholerelationthentookonablackhue,towhichherrepeatedandstubbornattemptstoinducemetotakemorphinewereunnecessaryforhertoappeartomeasakindofMedea,aladypoisonerfromColchis.

Someremarksonthecharacteristicofthezoneofvision[Bilderzone].Ifwhiletalkingtosomeonewenoticethatthispersonissmokingacigarorpacingbackandforthintheroom,etc.,itcomesasnosurprisetousthat,beingunconsciousoftheeffortweexpendinspeakingtohim,wearestillcapableoffollowinghismovements.Anentirelydifferentpictureispresented,however,whentheimagesweseebeforeuswhilespeakingtoathirdpartyhavetheiroriginswithinourselves.Inordinarystatesofconsciousnessthisis,ofcourse,notanissue.

Onthecontrary,supposesuchimagesarise,evenariseincessantly,theynonethelessremainunconscious.Inthehashishrauschthesituationisotherwise.Itispossible,asthiseveningproved,foravirtuallytumultuousproductionofimages[19]totakeplaceindependentlyofanyresidualfixationandorientationonthepartofourattention.Whereasimagesarisingspontaneouslyinordinarystates,ofwhichwearenotintheleastaware,remainforthatveryreasonunconscious,theimagesinhashishobviouslydonotrequireourattentionatallforthemtoshowthemselvestous.Tobesure,theproductionofimagescanunearthsuchextraordinarythingssofleetinglyandwithsuchrapiditythatwecannotmanagetopayattentiontoanythingelseonaccountofthebeautyandpeculiarityofthisworldofimages.Suchwasthecasethat--asInowformulateitinalucidstatewithacertainproficiencyinimitatinghashishformulations--everywordofEgon'sIhearddetainedmefromandistantjourney.Asfortheimagesthemse

lves,Icannolongersaymuchmorethanthattheyweresmallinscale,fortheyappearedanddisappearedwithtremendousrapidity.Theywereessentiallyobjective,butoftenwithaconsiderablyornamentaloverlay.Thingswithsuchanoverlayarepreferred:masonry,orexample,orarchwaysorcertainplants.AttheverybeginningIformedtheword"Strickpalmen"["Stitchpalms"]todesignatewhatIsaw.Palmswithacertainamountofmeshwork,likepetticoats,Iexplained.Thenentirelyindistinguishableimageslikethosefamiliartousfromsurrealistpainting.Forexample,alonggalleryofsuitsofarmorwhichconcealedneithersoul,norheads;insteadflamesplayedaroundtheopeningattheneck.Aterrificpealoflaughterfromtheotherswasreleasedbymy"DeclineoftheArtofCake-Baking."Thematterwasasfollows:foratimegiant,larger-than-lifesizecakesappearedtome.Likestandinginfrontofaloftymountain,thecakesweresogiganticthatIcouldonlyseepartofthem.Ilaunchedintodetaileddescriptions

ofhowsuchcakesweresoconsummatethatitwasnotnecessarytoeatthem,fortheyimmediatelystilledallappetitethroughtheeyes.AndthisIcalled"visionbread"[Augenbrot,literally"eyebread"].JusthowIhappenedtocointhisphrase,Icannolongerrecall.ButIbelievethatI'mnotmistakenwhenIconstrueitinthefollowingway:nowadaysoneisrequiredtoeatthecakeandthereinliestheblameforthedeclineintheartofcake-baking.ThecoffeewhichwaspouredintomycupItreatedanalogously.ForagoodquarterofanhourIheldthecupfullofcoffeesuspendedinmyhand,explainingitasbeingbeneathmydignitytodrinkfromit,andItransformedit,toacertainextent,intoasceptre.Howonecanspeakofthehand'sneedforasceptreinhashish.Thisrauschwa


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snotveryrichincoinages.Irecalla"Haupelzwerg"[20],aconceptwhichItriedtoconveytotheothers.MoreintelligibleismyreplytooneofGert'sutterances,whichItookupwithmycustomarilyunboundeddisdain.Andtheformulaofthisdisdainwas:"WhatyousaymeansasmuchtomeasaMagdeburgrooftop."

Particularlystrikingwasthebeginning,inthefirstphasesoftherausch,whenIcomparedthingstotheinstrumentsofanorchestrawhicharetunedbeforetheperformancebegins.

ProtocolVI:

WalterBenjamin:OntheSessionof7/8June1930

7/8June1930.Extremelydeephashishdepression.FeltpassionatelyinlovewithGert.Leftcompletelyforlorninmyarmchair;agonizedatherbeingalonewithEgon.Andontopofeverything,heisunusuallyjealousaswell;continuallythreatenedtothrowhimselfoutthewindowwereGerttoleavehim.Butthatisjustwhatshedidn'tdo.Certainlythesolidfoundationsofmysorrowwerealreadythere.Twodaysago,afleetingchanceoccurrenceatbecomingbetteracquaintedwhichrevealedjusthowmuchmysphereofactivitieshasinfactnarrowed,andnotlongbeforethat(apianoupstairsisbotheringme)thenoteworthynightwithMargareteKppke,whoinsistedsomuchonmybeingachildthatIdistinctlygathe

redhowmuchsheintendedtheoppositeofmanwiththeword,andwhoimpelledmesomuchtowardsmyownkindred.IfoundatleastthreeofthecomponentsinBloch'sformula:poor,old,sickandforsakentobeapplicabletomyself.Ihavedoubtswhetherthingswillturnoutwellforme.Asforcountry,localityandposition,meansofliving,thefutureholdsonlythemostuncertainprospectsforme.Manyfriends,butIpassfromonehandtothenext.Manyaccomplishments,butnonetomakealivingfromandmanywhichareahindrancetomywork.Itwasasifthesethoughtswantedtoholdmecaptive;andthistimetheydidso,too,withropes,sotospeak.HowinclinedIwastoseerevelationsbehindalloftheinsultingthingsGertsaid,whichshereadfrommyface,andtomakeKppke'sriddleswithdatesandwarningsmyown.IamsosadthatImustpracticallyindulgemyselfuninterruptedlyinordertolive.However,IwasalsoquitedeterminedtoletGertindulgeme.AsshedancedIdrankineverylinewhichshesetintomotio

n,andwhatallcouldn'tIsayaboutthisdanceandthisnightifSatanhimselfwerenotplayingpianoupstairsthere.IspokewhileIwaswatchingherwiththeconscioussenseofborrowingmuchfromAltenberg[21];wordsandfiguresofspeechofhis,perhaps,whichImyselfhadneverreadinhiswritings.WhileshewasinthemidstofherdanceItriedtodescribeittoher.ThemostexquisitethingwasthatIsaweverythinginthisdance,orrather,suchaninfiniteamountthatwascleartome;everythingwouldbeinconceivable.Whatistheinclinationofalltheagesforhashish,oftheKaffirhimselformanywords,thoughts,sounds--ofAfricaoroftheornament,forexample,comparedwiththeredAriadne'sthreadwhichoffersusthedancethroughitslabyrinth.Iallowedhereveryopportunitytotransformherselfinessence,inage,ingender.Manyidentitiesspreadoverherbacklikefogoverthenightsky.WhenshedancedwithEgonshewasaslenderboyinblackattire.Bothofthemcutanextravagantfigurethroughth

eroom.Apart,shewasquiteinlovewithherselfinthemirror.Thewindowinherbackstoodblackandempty.Initsframethecenturiesrecededinabackwardsmotionwhilewitheachofhergestures--soIsaidtoher--sheeithertookupafateorletitfall,twisteditaroundher,coilingherselftightlyintoit,orstrainedafterit,letitliethereorleanedamiablyclosetoit.WhatodalisquesdowhentheydancebeforePashas,Gertdidforme.Butthenthisfloodofinsultingwordseruptedfromherwhichsheseemedtohavepentupjustbeforethefinalwildestoutpouring.Ihadthefeelingthatshewasrestrainingherself,holdingbacktheworst,andinsothinkingIwouldcertainlynothavedeceivedmyself.Solitudethenfollowed,andhourslatertheattemptofbrowandvoicetoc


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onsole,butbythattimemygriefwithintherecessesofthesofabastionhadintensifiedtoomuchandIwasnottobecomerescued.Thereuponthemostunspeakablefacesdrownedalongwithme,[and]nothing,almostnothing[wouldhave]madeitacrosstosafetyweretherenotfloatingonthesurfaceofthisblackfloodthepeakofagothicchurchspiremadeofwood;woodenspiretrimmedwithcolorful,darkgreenandredpanes.

ProtocolVII:

EgonWissing:ProtocoltotheExperimentof7March1931

W[alter]B[enjamin],acapsuleat9o'clock,firsteffect11o'clock.Lyingdown,witheyesclosedmostofthetime,completelycalm.Myentriesconcludedat1o'clock.Approx.1/4hr.aftertheeffectssetinhestickshisindexfingerstraightupintheair;retainingthisgestureunchangedforatleastanhour.

Adepressiveandeuphor[ic]elementcontinuouslystruggledwithoneother.Itwasprobablynotthisconflictalone,however,whichledtothedifficultyorimpossibility--feltnegativelybythetestsubject--ofmakinganyprogresswithintherauschtowardtheconstructionofthoughts;rather,theeffectsoftheEukod[al][22],whichsubjecttookat10:30(0.02subcutaneously),certainlyplayedapartaswell.Anadditionalfeaturebelongingtothegeneralcharacteristic[is

]thattoysorcolorfulchildren'spicturesthrustthemselvestotheforeagainandagain.

Subjectrepeatedlymakesvaininitialattemptstomeettherauschhalfway;theleftbedroomwindowplayedapartinthiscontext,justbeforetheblueofthenightskyassumedanunusualintensityandsweetnessundertheinfluenceoftheh[ashish],whichaccountsfortheexplanationlaterthatthewindowhad"somethingoftheheart..."

"Crouchingwindmillsfromachildren'sbook,"agriculturalimagesalsoreturnedlater.Therewasanexcursusaboutthe"fielddrum"["Ackerwalze"]withironicallusionstotheOsthilfe[23].Thefielddrum,whosecrankliesdeeplyhiddeninthegrain,isturnedbyagoblinandeffectstheripeningoftheseed.

Hisraisedarm,orratherhand,"disguisesitself"coveredwithvaricoloredglazedpaper.Thesubjectexplainsthathisarmis"alook-outtower-orratheralook-intower--imagesgoinandout--hefeelsnopain."

ItisatthisphasethatIamtelephonedandmymedicalservicesareurgentlybeckonedbyaneighborwomanwholivesonthesamefloor.Ipromptlyputmyselfinsomesemblanceoforder,standup,wherebysubjectseemstobeextremelyunhappyandutters:"Don'tleavemealone,"etc.Istayforabout10minutesandreturnafterwards.Subjectislyinginexactlythesameposition,theindexfingerstillpointingvertically.HeindicatesthatIhavebeenveryneglectful.

Fromsubject'slaterpronouncementsandrecollectionsarosetheparticularlyimp

ressiveimageofastaircase,whichwaslateran"icestaircase"whenceanextractappearedinthespiralformofasmallerthanlife-sizewindingstaircaseuponwhoseeverystepalongtheouterwallatiny,delicatelycoloreddoll-likefigureappearedtobemeltingaway,whichthetestsubjectcalled"littledollman",consciousthathewasvulgarizingthestateofaffairsinaphilistinemanner.Latertherewasalsotalkofa"littledollwoman".Allofitentirelyfanciful,smallerthanlife-size.

Therenowcameaperiodinwhichvegetableformsstoodintheforeground.Thesementalimages[Vorstellungen,representations]wereaccompaniedtosomeextentb


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yasadisticprimaryfeeling.Inthiscontextextremelytalltreeswhichwereslenderandstrictlysymmetricalinformplayedthemainpart.Itdidnottakelongbeforethesetreesbecamemetallic.Thetestsubjectgavetooneofthemthefollowingexplanation:therigidnessandimmovablenessofthistreedoesnotatallbelongtoitsoriginalnature,whichhadoncebeensomethingfulloflife.Onestillrecognizesitinthebeatingofbothgreatwings,totherightandleftbeneaththetreetop.(HenceavariantoftheDaphnemotiftosomeextent).Accordingtothesubject,thetreesmakesnappingmovements,theybecome"Schnap-trees"[24],called"littleZopper-tree"[25]inanearliercontext.(Comparethistowhatwassaidaboutthe"littledollman").--

Theleitmotifsofthefollowingsequenceofimageshavebeendesignatedbythetestsubjecthimselfas"heraldic".Atthesametimetheimageofrhythmicallyanimatedsurfacesofwaterfirstappeared,whichlastedforalongertime.Thevisualmirror-relationofheraldicemblems,theshiftedcorrespondencewhichoccursjustlikecrests[Wappen,also"coatsofarms"]inthemirror-imagesofthewater,becomesexpressedbythesubjectwiththeverse:

"Wellenschwappen--Wappenschwellen"

["Wavesaresplashing-Crestsareswelling"][26].

Thiswordordercameasthefinallysatisfyingoneafternumerousotherattempts.Thesubjectsetgreatstorebythisverse,intheconvictionthatherethesam

emirrorsymmetrythatdominatedtheimagesofcrestsandwavesalsocametolightinlanguage--thoughcertainlynotbyimitating,butratherinoriginalidentitywiththeopticalimage.Thesubjectholdsforthinsistently:"quodinimaginibus,estinlingua".Thewatercontinuestodominatetheimage-world.Thementalimageoftheseawhichthewaveswerebasedonrecedes,however,intotheimageofcurrents.Itswateractuallynevercomestolight,i.e.,itiscoveredoverinlayersoffruit-likepatterns,laterplainlyfruit,predominantlyberries,whichliestratifiedintinytartlet-likeboats,whichslidefromoneintothenext.Thesubjectspeaksof"Beerenwiegen"[berry-cradles],"Zipwiegen"[onion-cradles][27]or"garden-fruitcradles"aswell.--"Alltheseasandriversfilledwithlittlefruitcradles."Thevegetableformswerefinallytransformedintogarlands,therewastalkofa"scienceofgarlands."

Itseemedthataperiodofdeepreverie(Versunkenheit,immersion)thenfollowed,fromwhichtheoriginalprotocolhasretainedthesentence:"Onehearsnotwiththeearsalone,butalsowiththevoice."Thesubjectelucidatesthesentence:intherauschthevoiceisnotonlyaspontaneousbutalsoareceptiveorgan;byspeakingitexplores,asitwere,thatwhereofitspeaks.Forexample,whenspeakingofthestonestepsofastaircase,thevoicemimeticallyreceivesthehollowspacesoftheporousstoneinitsownsonority.

Animagewithoutanycontrollablecontextarises:fishnets."Netsspreadoverthewholeearthbeforetheendoftheworld."Theworldtherebyemptyofhumanbeings,grey.

Ashortperiodoforientalimagesfollowed:"Elephants,changingpagodas.Thele

gsoftheelephantsswaylikefir-trees."

Awoodappearstothesubject.Heexplainssomewhatironicallythatpeoplearealwaysspeakingabouttheallureofthewoods.Well,whydothewoodslurethem,then?OnecanexperiencethiswithMexicans.TotheMexican,goingintothewoodsmeanstodie.Thatisthereasonwhythewoodsallure."

Testsubjectexplainsthathe'shavinga"badrausch".Heblamesthemorphineforhis"demoralization".Bydemoralizationhemeansasmalloutputofknowledgeyieldedintherausch.Accordingly,somewhatlateronthesubjectexplainsthath


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e'shad"noproperrauschatall,ratheradecorativerauschandsalesrausch."[ZierrauschundReklamerausch].

"Grottomadeoffretwork","fretsaw-nose"["Laubsgenase"][28]andthenwithanalterationoftheconsonants"Laufsgespiel"

Inthisconnectionthenwasthetaleaboutthefield-drum(seeabove).

"Good,learned,playthings",later:newcharacteristicoftherausch:"horserausch","plasterrausch"[Pflasterrausch],"dainty,foppishandplastery"--"everythinginlaidlikemarzipan...,mustonedifferentiatesweetsinthevariousdomainsofthesenses?"Evidentlyamoreseriousadvanceinthedirectionofknowledgewasplannedhereregardingthatwhichmadesweetnessinthevariousdomainsofthesensesandexperiencepossible.Butatthetimetheonlysentenceformulatedwhichmightindicatehisviewpointtowardthisepistemologicalexperimentwas:"Theknowledgeofthesweetisnotsweet."

"Boxstate...","theimageswanttoshutoneupinsidealonelychamber,shouldoneenterthem."

Newcharacteristicoftherausch::"Wertheimerrausch[29]:everythinginmassquantities."(Comparewiththeabove-mentionedcurrentsinundatedwiththesamekindsofthings.)Subsequenttothis:"Onewouldhavetopersevere,thattherebeverymanypeoplelikeoneself."Thissentencewassurelynotcoinedsolelywith

regardtothespiritual,butratherspecifically,perhapsaboveall,withregardtocorporealappearance.

"Snowflakes...shaggy-heads...childish."Thesubjectdescribesindetailhowsnowisshakenoutof"cottonbins"fromthesky.

"Imagesdesireonlytheirflux,everythingisthesametothem."

"Remembranceisabath."

Withperhapsanallusiontotheseductivesweetnessoftherausch,particularlythemo[rphine]rausch,itwasthensaid:"tocastintentionstothewindisasportinglycorrectactivity."

Later:"Iwouldliketowritesomethingthatemergesfromthingslikewinefromgrapes."

[Herethereisasmalllacunaintheprotocol]

Lateronthesubjectdescribes"anunbelievablyhighVenicewhereoneseesnosea."Thattheseathereishiddenorratherbecomesrestrainedisportrayedbythesubjectwithafeelingoftriumph.Heunderscoredthatwiththeinformationonthe"heraldicmottoofthecity":"Venetianinonmonstrantmarem."SubjectlingersoverVeniceandspeaksof"inauthentic,dim,enchantedlagunes."

"Gristmillslaidbycomplaintlikeeggsbychickens."["Mhle,diedieKlagesole

gt,wiedieHhnerdieEier."]

"Citywithgardenswherepeopletakealittlehashish"(Akindofgreater,moreblissfulallotmentgarden)"Advantagesoftheha[shish]delightingeneralmustbeweighedunprejudicially."

AlittlefantasyfollowswhosekinshipwithsomeofKubin's[30]notionswasdeclaredbythesubjecthimself."Thatisthestoryofthegarret-milliner,whomodeledthegarretsofthecityaccordingtotheformsprevailingatthetime."


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Withtheremarkthatthe"theSwissofthePope"aretohavebeenfrom"SaxonSwitzerland"theprotocolcametoaclose.

ProtocolVIII:

FritzFrnkel:ProtocoloftheExperimentof12April1931(Fragment.)

W[alter]B[enjamin]O.4gr.11:15p.m.(Itbecameapparentlaterthatthedosewasnotsufficientforattainingadeeprausch.)

Acertainnegligibleeffectcameonafterthreequartersofanhourbutwasgreatlyassistedinanobviousmannerbythetestsubject.Oneremarkisparticularlyinterestinginthecontextofthefollowingprotocolwherea"concurrencebetweenyellowandgreen"ismentioned.Theremarkwasoccasionedbythesustainedcontemplationofapieceoftinfoil.

"Halosaremountainresortsforangels.""TheheavenlyJerusalemisamountainairresort."Thatisimportant.Conversely:"[The]high-altituderesortisareligiousconcept."

"IfFreudpsychoanalyzedtheCreation,thenthefjordswouldnotcomeoffwell."

"Rststadt[Scaffoldcity]:Oldcityofcast-offscaffoldingerectedforthesunset.ThecitycanbecalledRoughneck."

Adogbarks.Subjectspeaksofajaggeddogandexplainsbarkingasanacousticserration.Incontrasttothejaggeddogispositedtherefineddog,i.e.,aquietdog.(Implicitistheideathatthedogisunrefinedbecausehebarks).

"Ornamentsarespirit-settlements[Geistersiedlungen]".

ProtocolIX:

FritzFrnkel:Protocolof18April1931

11p.m.W[alter]B[enjamin]1.0gr.

12Midnight:Suddenlaughter,repeatedinshortbursts."Iwouldliketometamorphoseintoamouse-mountain[Mausberg]"(Naturally:Parturiuntmontes,nasceturridiculusmus).[31]

"That'smoreSimulinthanhashish."Thisremarkmadeespeciallyclearthetestsubject'ssuspicionofthepreparation'squality,whichpreoccupiedhimthroughoutthebeginning[oftheexperiment].

"We'llmakethisEnochthedeadhead[Zaungast,also"looker-on"]ofthismeeting

."WhenIlaughatthisthesubjectremarks:"onecannottalktoameratsim."[32]

Subjectsuddenlyshoutsinamilitarytoneofvoice:"Halt,ap-penned-tion!"[33]Thismannerofspeakingwastorecurlater.Trustinthequalityofthepreparationbeginstomakeitselfapparent.Subjectexpressestheopinionthatitisapreparationfor"seesawing".Twodifferentstatesofmindareconcentratedinthisremark:firstofall,ittakesintoaccountthephase-likecharacteroftheprocess.Secondly,however,thereistheeverpersistingmistrust,inwhichcasetheseesawswingsbetweensobrietyandrausch.


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Testsubjectnoticesacrumpledpieceofpapernexttoabottleonthelittletableandinanoverjoyedtonedesignatesthis"littlemonkey",orrather"littlestereoscopettemonkey"[Stereoskopinffchen],"littlestereoscopette".Inkeepingwiththequitelightandfriendlycharacterofthisrausch,thedrollrelationsubjecthastohisownDaseindoesnotrevealitselfthroughhaughtinessanddistance,asisnormal.Subject'selationhasinsteadtheoppositeeffect,namelyassensitivitytothings,abovealltowords.Testsubjectusesaremarkablenumberofdiminutives.Thepriorincidentwiththeword"littlestereoscopettemonkey"isthereforequiteindicativeofhowthehashishrauscheffectsakindofvolatilizationofmentalimagesintoword-aromas,thoughhere,forexample,theactualsubstanceofthementalimageintheword--thestem:monkey--completelyevaporates.

Mistrustreemerges:testsubjectdeclaresthat"itallhasnoeffect"andtheninamilitarytoneofvoice:"Quiet;"helooksatthecrumpledballofpaperagainandcallstoit,"Come,littlemonkey,""themonkey'smonkeyingaround,""tomonkeyaround"[ffen],"toape"[nachffen],"topre-personate"[vorffen].[34]

Adogonthestreetthathasbeenbarkingforsometimeisdesignatedbythetestsubjectas"hashishhound".[35]

Mistrustreemergesforthelasttime.Subjectexpressesthatthereis"notraceofaneffect"butthenvariousobjectsbegintoarrangethemselvesinsuchaway

that"Icouldbehavinganeffect".Theroomwefindourselvesiniscalledan"unattractiveroom"where,accordingtothesubject,"orientalpalacesbelong,Idon'tdreamofpicturingitmyself,insuchawaythatwoulddopalacesjustice."Furthermore,subjectexpresseshisdesire"toseesomethingbeautiful".

Subjectpicksupanewspaperandseriouslyattemptstoreadit,showingnopreoccupationwithinneraspectsoftherausch.Atanyrate,readingthenewswasnotasuccess;whetherthereasonswerementalorphysicalcannotbeascertained;evidentlyfromboth;inanycasethecomprehensionoftheprintedlettersonthepagewashinderedbyentopticscomata.Testsubjectfeelsmysteriouslyamusedbythedriestpoliticalslogans.IronicwordplaywiththenamesFrickandMunter.[36]"Pu-pu-publicpeace,respectandorder."

Atthispoint,subjectsteppedoverthethresholdoftheactualrausch.

"Allthecolorsareadvancingfromthesnow--youhavetopayattentiontocolors."

Asinearlierexperiments,testsubjectholdshisforearmandindexfingerstraightupintheair,supportedbyhiselbow."Perhapsmyhandwillslowlyturnintoalittletendril."Itisnowmostunusuallycharacteristicthateithersimultaneouslywiththisremarkorimmediatelythereafter,subject'smentalimageofhishandbranchingoutintotendrilswasfollowedbytheimageofhishandbecomingovergrownwithhoar-frost.Thismentalimage,however,absolutelydidnotenterintospeechduringtherausch;onthecontrary,ithaditsactualfunctionintheperpetualprocessofbecomingpostponed,sothatforlongstretchesofther

auschonecanspeakofatechnicalconstructionofaRahmenerzhlung[linkandframestory,storywithinastory]:twolimbsofamentalimagebranchofffromoneanother,raisingthewholeprofusionofimagesinthespacebetweentoanewphase.Onehastonegotiate,sotospeak,the"opensesame"whichisdirectedatthementalimage.Thementalimageitselfsplitsintwo,openingthedoorwaytonewtreasurechestsofimages.Thisconstantlyrepeatedmechanismcomprisesoneofthemostamusingmomentsofthehashishrausch.

"Everythingcommenceswithaneffortless'perhaps'."


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"Vermingohome"["UngeziefergehensienachHause"].

"Thecylinderistheextensionoftheman."

Testsubjectisonceagainoccupiedwiththeroom,nowinafarmoreamiablemoodthanbefore.Hecallsit"littleroom,"saying"littleroom,I'dliketosaysomethingbeautifultoyou."

Inacontextwhichcannolongerberecalled,thesubjecthastheurgetocharacterizeoneofhisremarksasadigression.Forthatreasontheexpression'curveintheglazing'occurstohim.Thatwasconnectedtoanopticalimagethatentirelycorrespondedtotheword.

Testsubjectnolongerhasanydoubtnowconcerningtheefficacyofthepreparationandsays:"TheMerckfirmhasstoodthetest."Subjecthas"aparadegroundfullofthoughts"andthensays"thelittleroomandthepreparationcompriseaTempelhofFieldfullofthoughts."[37]Testsubjectreturnstothesubjectofcolors,beginningwithhispronunciationofthewordgreen[grn]inaverydrawnoutsingingcadence(approx.20sec.)andthensays:"greenisalsoyellow."

Whateverthislastremarkreferstointhefirstplace,itmeansnothingmorethanwhatitsays,butperhapsmorethanwhatitsays.Itisbasedupontheexperienceofamentalimageofsomethingyellownexttotheimageofsomethinggreenatthesametimeasthesinging-soundingrn.Bestwouldbetocircumscribethese

intheimageofaswellingmeadowwhoseperipheryreleasesyellowsand.Asfortheperseverationofthewordgrn:hereforperhapsthefirsttimetheintenselypathicaccentoftherauschmanifestsitself,laterbecomingmoreandmorepotentineffect.Thelong,drawnoutvowelcontainsit,sotospeak,inthesensethatthevoiceisdrawnfromthetone;justasthegreenwascharacteristicofsomethingattractive,alluring,andleadingintotheevermoreremotedistance."Asthecloudswanderintheheavenlycanopy",sodoesthevoicewanderafterthetoneandtheinnerviewafterthethingsatthisstageoftherausch.Therefore,whenitissaidthatyellowisalsogreen,whatisroughlymeantisthattheyellowwhichappearstotheinebriatedrawsthegreenalongwithitingentlebutirresistiblecurrents.

"Thoughtsofcolorsaretender,justasNorwegiansandflowersaretender;tende

randardent."(Thisobservationcharacterizesitselfasamomentofabrighterphasebythearbitrary,associativememorycomingintoplay.)

Whatisapparentlythedeepeststageoftherauschbegins.Withalongandinvolvedintroduction,therebeginstherevelation--postponedoverandoveragain--ofsecrets.Unfortunately,thesecondofthesesecretsisnottobefound,foratthispointtheprotocol'stranscriberwasquiteresolutelyforbiddentotakedownnotes.Thisjudgmenttoagreatextenttestifiestothedepthoftherausch,forinlessprofoundstagestheinebriate'svanityisquitepleasantlyaffectedbythefactthathiswordsarebeingrecorded.Thefirstofthesesecrets:

"Itisalaw:thereisonlyahashisheffectwhenoneistalkingabouthashish."

Thesubjecturgentlyinsiststhatthewindowbeclosed,nodoubtbecausehefeelsdisturbedbythenoisecomingfromoutside.Ishutthewindow,whichelicitsthemostappreciativethanks.Withinthiscontexttherefollowsaspeculationaboutthe'gooddeed'."Whensomeonehasdonesomethinggood,thenperhapsitturnsintotheeyeofabird."

Concerningthismatteritistobeobserved:itisasusualasitischaracteristicofthehashishrauschthatspeakingisconnectedtoakindofresignation,thattheinebriatehasalreadyrenouncedexpressingwhatreallymoveshim,thathemakesanefforttogiveexpressiontosomethingparenthetical,somethingnots


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eriousinsteadofsomethingauthentic,butinexpressible,thathenotinfrequentlyspeakswiththesenseofbeingguiltyofinsincerityandthat--andthisisthemostremarkablething,needingsomeclarification--thethingsexpressedinruptures,sotospeak,maybefarmoreremarkableandprofoundthanthatwhichwouldcorrespondto"whatwasintended"[Gemeinten].

Thescratchingofthepencilacrossthepaperstrikesthesubject"asscratchingacrosssilk,""littlescratchette".Thiswordisrepeatedseveraltimes.Testsubjectannouncesthatheishaving"aterrificallypotenteffect,connectedwiththemostpowerfulthingsI'veeverfeltinhashish."Thekindofrauschnowappearstohimas"indescribablyfestive".Atthispointthetranscriberoftheprotocolwasresolutelyforbiddentotakenotesandthesecondsecretwasdisclosed.Thementalimagewasforthemostpartthatofanarrowplacesurroundedbyverytallhouses,theroofsofwhichendedinwhatwasalmostanarch.Thefeelingconnectedwiththisimagewasofunparalleledfestivenessthattherewasarchitecturespoiledsohabitablybyinhabitationandatthesametimeuninhabited.Theobservation:"Everythingoverheadissealedofftome"wasalsoinreferencetothisdeeplayerofimageswhichwasotherwiseonlyshort-livedandappearedfleetingly.(Thiscouldbecomparedtotherepresentationalscopeofgravearchitecture.)

Thetestsubjecttellstheprotocol'stranscriberthatheprefersnottobeaddressedinthefamiliar"du"(you)form.Reason:"IamnotI,Iamthehashishincertaininstances."Physicalsymptomsarealsoespeciallystronginthisstage.

"Thelegslikethey'relacedtogether","spasm"[Spasmus],thensubsequently"SpasmusSempersJugendland,"[38]whichischaracterizedbythetestsubjectasan"epilepticnovel."

Thesentencethatnowfollows:"Importantthoughtshavetobetemperedsomewhatinsleep"mayberelatedtothepreviouslymentionedtendencytopostponeexpressingone'sthoughts,atendencywhichnowandthencanlead,asstated,totheircompleterepression.Ina"deepphase,whichIpracticallystumbleduponbyaccident;terrificallydeep"therefollowsthethird"great"secret.Thisisinfactasynopsisofthefundamentalcharacterofthisparticularrausch.Itischaracterizedasthesecretofwandering.Wanderingisnotbasedonapurposefulmovement,noraspontaneity,butratheraplainlyunfathomablesenseofbeingdrawn,wanderingisapathicstate,onecouldillustrateitbycomparingittoclouds;

supposingonecouldintuittheirdrift,theywouldbefoundnottodrawbuttobedrawn.

"Colorneedsonlytothrowshadows."

"Noonewillbeabletounderstandthisrausch,thewilltoawakenhasdied."

Thechocolatewhichisofferedtothesubjectisdeclinedwiththewords:"foodbelongstoanotherworld";heissupposedly"preventedfromeatingbyadividingwallofglass."

"Thesubjectofaveiledfacewhichisitselfaveilismuchtooetherealtoallowforfurtherdiscussion;onlyhashishknowsaboutthat."

Itistobenotedherethattheapparitionofthatveiledfacewhichwasitselfaveilwasofsuchanunprecedentedlystrikingqualitythatitwasstillclearinthesubject'sminddayslater.Itwasasmall,ovalhead;behindtheveilwasanotherveil,patternedpreciselyaftertheformofaface.Theseveilswerenothangingbutinsteadweremovinggently,stirredasifbyanexhalation.

"Allnoisesswelltogetherbythemselvesinlandscapes."Iheaveasigh,towhichtestsubjectremarks:"Thesigh...likeprospects;wehavealreadyheavedprospectsinsighs."(Thedistancestretchedoutbeforehiseyesasifexhaledint


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oview.Thedistancedrawsclosertothebreathtothesameextentthatitdistancesitselffromview.)Theproblemoftheconnectionofthesenseswasraised,andthedepthwithinthesameordifferentlayerswithwhichtheyextend.

Themoodchangesabruptly.Testsubjectsuddenlyshouts:"Therauschisturning!"andrepeatstheutterance,laughing,thathesuddenlyhappenstobein"anoperettamood."Furthermore,therewascompleteconsciousnessofthepotencyoftherausch,whichwasmadeapparentwiththeremark:"therauschcouldlast30hours."

Supportofarmandindexfingerisrelaxedandthensubjectholdshisarmstraightupintheair,callingit"thebirthofthekingdomofArmenia."

Earlier,whenraisinghisarm:"Nowwewillturnourgazetotheinterpretationofthecelestialbodies,"hisraisedarmactinghereasatelescope.

Testsubjectsuddenlyfallsasleep(1:15a.m.).

ProtocolX:

WalterBenjamin:CrockNotes:[39]

Nolegitimationofcrockismoreeffectivethanthesuddenawarenessofitshavinghelpedtopenetratethathidden,generallyinaccessibleworldofsurfacesconstitutingtheornament.Wearesurroundedbyitalmosteveryday,ofcourse.Nevertheless,littleconfrontsuswhichsobreaksdownourfacultiesofperceptionasitdoes.Forthemostpart,infact,werarelyseethisworldatall.Withcrock,however,thepresenceofitpreoccupiesusintensely:somuchsothatwiththedeepestpleasureweplayfullyexhaustthoseexperiencesoftheornamentwhichchildhoodandfevermadeuscapableofobserving.Theseexperiencesarebasedontwodifferentelements,bothofwhichachievetheirpeakeffectivenessincrockAtissuehereisthemultiplesignificanceoftheornament.Thereisnotaonethatcannotbeviewedfromatleasttwosides:namely,assurfacepatternorelseaslinearconfiguration.Inmostofthem,however,theindividualforms,whichcanbeunitedinverydifferentgroups,arecapableofamultiplicityofconf

igurations.Thisexperiencealoneindicatesoneofthemostintrinsiccharacteristicsofcrocknamely,itsindefatigablewillingnesstoextractamultiplicityofsides,contentsandmeaningsfromoneandthesamesetofcircumstances--forexample,fromadecororlandscapepainting.Inanothercontextitwillbeshownthatthismulti-interpretability,whoseur-phenomenonliesintheornament,merelyrepresentsanothersideofthepeculiarexperienceofidentitywhichcrockdiscloses.Theotherfeatureoftheornamentwhichaccoststhecrockreverieliesinitsrecurrence.Itishighlycharacteristicofthereveriethatittendstopresentbeforethesmokerobjects--particularlysmallones--inseries.Theendlesssuccessionsinwhichthesamecontrivances,littleanimalsorplantformssuddenlysurfaceinfrontofthepersonoverandoveragaindepict,sotospeak,misshapen,barelyformedsketchesofaprimitiveornament.

Alongwiththeornament,however,certainotherthingsofthemostbanalperceptualworld[Merkwelt]appear,whoseinherentsenseandsignificanceonlycrockcantransmit.Amongotherthings,curtainsandlacebelongtothiscategory.Curtainsareinterpretersforthelanguageofthewind.Theygiveitseverybreaththeformandsensuousnessoffeminineforms.Andtothesmokerwhobecomesimmersedintheirplaytheyallowallthejoystobesavoredwhichaconsummatedancercanvouchsafe.Ontheotherhand,ifthecurtainisfiligreeditcanbecometheinstrumentofanevenmorecuriousplay.Fortothesmoker,theselacesprovethemselvestobepatternswhichhedrapesoverthelandscapeinordertotransformitinthemostpeculiarway.Thelandscapewhichcomesintoviewbehindthela


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ceissubordinatedtothepatterninapproximatelythesamewaythattheplumageofbirdsortheshapesofflowersaresubordinatedtothepatterninthearrangementofcertainhats.Thereareold-fashionedpostcardswherea"GreetingsfromBadEms"partititionsthecityintopicturesofthespapromenade,railroadstation,KaiserWilhelmmonument,schoolandCarolineHts.,eachonecircumscribedinitsownlittleframe.Suchpostcardsbestconveyanideaofhowthelacecurtainsexercisetheirdominionovertheviewofthelandscape.Itriedtotracetheflagfromoutofthecurtain,butiteludedme.

Colorscanexertanuncommonlypowerfulimpressionuponthesmoker.AcornerinS[elz]'sroomwasdecoratedwithscarveshangingonthewall.Apairoftumblersfilledwithflowersweresittingonacrate,whichwasdrapedoverwithalacescarf.Inthescarfandflowersvariousshadesofredpredominated.AtanadvancedstageofthefteIsuddenlydiscoveredthisnook.Ithadanalmostdeafeningeffectuponme.InstantaneouslyIrealizedthat,usingthisincomparabletool,mytaskwasdiscoverthesenseofthecolor.Icalledthisnookthe"LaboratoireduRouge".Myfirstattempttotakeonthisprojectwasnotsuccessful.Icamebacktoitlater,however.Atthemoment,myonlyrecollectionoftheattemptisthattheformulationofthequestionhasbeenpostponed.Itwas,granted,amoreuniversaloneandconcernedcolorsingeneral.Itappearedtomethat,aboveall,theirdistinctivecharacteristicpossessedform,[and]thattheywerecompletelyidenticaltothematerialinwhichtheyappeared.Althoughtheyappearedcompletelythesameinthemostdissimilarthings--e.g.aflowerpetalandapieceofpaper--theyappearedasmediatorormatchmakerofthematerialrealm;onlyb

ymeansofthemdidthemostdistantobjectshavethepowerofcombiningperfectlywithoneanother.

II

Amoralizingposturewhichobstructsessentialinsightsintothenatureofcrockhasdrawnattentionawayfromadecisiveaspectoftheintoxication.Thequestionisaneconomicone.Foritisnotoverstatingthecasetosaythataprimarymotiveofaddictioninverymanyinstancesisthis:toenhancetheaddict'ssuitabilityinthestruggleforexistence[Existenzkampf].Andthisgoalisbynomeansafictiveone;onthecontrary,itisactuallyattainedinmanyinstances.

Thiscomesasnosurpisetoanyonewhohasbeenabletofollowtheincreasingpowerofattraction,whichthetoxinuncommonlyoftenbestowsupontheaddict.Thephenomenonisasundeniableasitsreasonsareconcealed.Onecansurmisethatinthecourseofthealterationswhichthetoxinengenders,italsointerruptsapatternofbehaviorwhichforthemostparthinderstheindividual.Unkindness,fanaticismaboutbeingcorrect,andpharasaismaretraitswhichoneonlyseldomencountersinaddicts.Addtothisasedativeeffectofthetoxin,solongasitspotencylasts,andnottheminutestfactorisabletojustifytheconvinctionthattherecouldbevirtuallynothingsignificantorworthwhileintakingthetoxin.Nowallthiscangiveeventhoseofamoreunassumingnatureasovereigntywhichtheyoriginallydidnotpossess-especiallyintheirvocationalcapacity.Suchastateofmindbecomesespeciallyvaluabletosolitaryindividualsbecauseitmakesthechanges-incharacterandevenphysiognomy-knownnotonlyto

othersbutalso,andperhapsmoreimportantly,totheaddictsthemselves.Whileontheonehandthemechanism

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