Basic Needs n the need for direction & hope… self-worth consisting of the need for love & purpose...
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Transcript of Basic Needs n the need for direction & hope… self-worth consisting of the need for love & purpose...
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Basic Needs the need for direction &
hope… self-worth consisting of the need for love & purpose
There exists… “deep longings in the human heart for relationship and impact”… which can only be met in life with Christ
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What Makes Us a Better People Helper? (A Framework)
Spiritual Issues/Concerns
Physical/Biochemical
Emotional
Relational
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What Makes Us a Better People Helper?
1. Psychological Stability(emotional stability, openness- vulnerable- not labile or volatile)
2. Love for and interest in people (warm, caring, genuine person with a real interest in people and their welfare- Mt:14:14)
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What Makes Us a Better People Helper?
3. Self-Awarenesss4. Some life experiences
5. Appropriate distance and boundaries
6. Ability to maintain confidentiality
7. Ability to know when you are over your head
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Questions to Ponder Of all the relational
qualities that make us better people helpers, Which ones are most important? What strikes you most about the relational character of Jesus?
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I. Most Effective
Counselor Skills Warmth -John 4
Caring, respect, sincere, non-smothering concern… regardless of the person’s actions or attitudes
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I. Most Effective
Counselor Skills Genuineness
not phony or superior, open, sincere… honesty without cruel confrontation… (a soft answer turns away wrath), being congruent
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I. Most Effective
Counselor Skills EmpathySensitive and able to
communicate understanding of the person’s thoughts, feelings, values, beliefs, inner conflicts… to “feel with”, especially at the beginning is most helpful
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Studies Show:
No particular form of therapy works better than another… but those 3 make a difference
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Studies Show: Warmth,
Genuineness, & Empathy- especially at the beginning- has been proven to foster healing better… lack of these= worse
*** Relationships Heal***
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Studies Show: Warmth-
Genuineness- Empathy… create safety… Everything else is impossible without it
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Questions to Ponder
What is the goal of counseling? How have you been helped? What do you hope to see happen?
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The test...NOTE:
A man goes to a psychologist, and they decide to start witha Rorschach test. She's shown the first picture and sees a man and a woman making love at the beach. In the second, a man and a woman making love in a hot-tub. The third has a man and a woman making love in a park. In all of the pictures, the man sees a couple making love.
After the test, the psychologist looks over her notes and says, "You seem to have a preoccupation with sex." The man replies, "You're the one with the dirty pictures."
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II. Goal of
Counseling: A. Self
Understanding… to help person
get a true picture of what is going on within them and the world around them...
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II. Goal of
Counseling: B. Communication
… to learn how to communicate feelings, thoughts, attitudes- effectively and accurately...
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II. Goal of
Counseling: C. Learning &
Behavior Change… to encourage the
person to “launch out” and practice new behavior… thru instruction, modeling, trial/Error...
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II. Goal of
Counseling: D. Self-Actualization…to develop
greatest potential thru power of Holy Spirit towards spiritual maturity… (“Christ-actualization”)
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II. Goal of
Counseling: E. Support
… to encourage, pray for, make contact, enlist help, “walk alongside”...
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III. Techniques of
Counseling A. Attending
(undivided attention)
1: eye contact
2. posture
3. gestures
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III. Techniques of
Counseling B. Listening1. Have awareness2. Be nonjudgmental3. Be quiet4. Seek understanding* advice giving &
talking prevents sharing & safety
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III. Techniques of
Counseling C. Responding1. Leading2. Reflecting3. Questioning 4. Confronting5. Informing6. Interpreting7. Support/encrge.
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III. Techniques of
Counseling D. Teaching
...by instruction, example, information
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III. Techniques of
Counseling Also… one of the
most powerful learning tools to use: immediacy responses… focus on the here & now
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The Process of Therapy
Not linear- like layers of an onion
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Specific Issues:
What do you want to focus on?
(anger, anxiety, depression, crisis, infidelity,substance abuse, etc.)