Authentic Movement2

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uthentic M ove m ent andDance Therapy

Shira usicant

The discipl ine of authentic moveme nt adds an impor tant dimen sionto the field of dance therapy. In this paper, authentic movement isdescribed, and three aspects are discussed and related to the theoryand practice of dance therapy: inn er l istening, witne ssing and processorientation. This work is based on fifteen years of experience withauthent ic movement in the Santa Barbara authent ic movementgroup. Clinical examples are dra wn from Cottage Hospital 's psychi-atric unit , Sanctuary House (a residential t reatment program), andthe author' s privat e practice. It is concluded tha t th e study of authe n-t ic movement can make a meanin gful contribu tion to the train ing andconti nuin g education of dance therapists.

h i s p a p e r h i g h l i g h t s s o m e a s p ec t s o f a u t h e n t i c m o v e m e n t t h a t h a v ep a r t i c u l a r s i g ni f i c an c e fo r d a n c e t h e r a p y a n d h a v e i n f o r m e d m y d a n c et h e r a p y p ra c t ic e : i n n e r l i s te n i n g w i t n e s s i n g a n d p r o c e s s o r i e n t a t io n . A

b r i e f d e s c ri p t i o n o f a u t h e n t i c m o v e m e n t a n d m y e x p e r ie n c e w i t h a u t h e n -t i c m o v e m e n t f o l l o w s .

I have drawn extensively from my experience as a member of the Santa Barbara authenti cmovement group, and from my clinical experience.My love and thanks to the past and present members of the Santa Barbara authenticmovement group for sharing moving, witnessing , ideas, dreams and compassion: Pauline,Diana, Kathee, Lynn, Joanna, Candice, Barbara. My gratitude to my teachers: JoanChodorow for introducing me to dance therapy and authen tic movement, and for inspir ingme as a therapist; Janet Adler for her witnessing and ongoing clarity of vision; AlmaHawkins and Irma Dosamantes for introducing me to inner listening.I gratefully acknowledge the feedback of Kathee Miller, Sybil Meyer and Kayla Kit sch onearly drafts of this manuscript.

American Journal of Dance Therapy 9 1994 American DanceVol. 16, No. 2, Fal l/Winter 1994 91 Therapy Association


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9 Sh i ra M u s ica n t

Authe ntic mo vem ent has been extens ively described in the Dance Ther-apy li ter atu re (Adler 1987, Chodorow 1986, Whit eho use 1963). Aut hen ticmov emen t is a discrete discipline or practice tha t involves a mover and awitness. F or the mover, it also involves the i nte nt to be in relationsh ip toone's se lf -t o open a dialogue with the unconscious by giving bodily formto the str eam of mate rial which is available to us as sensation, feelingand image. This relatio nship with one's own unconscious stream of mate-rial calls for an %the r to see and contain the experience of immersion.This is the witness. Adler (1985) says that

while the mover is developing an inte rna l witness, the presence of anexte rnal witness is critical. As long as the unknown is being exploredthrough the arrival and encounter with unconscious activity there isthe element of fear and/or awe. The presence of another in ei ther caseis a response to the human need for safety, containment, balance, and/or the objective mind. (p. 15)

The witness too enters a rela tionship with he r self. As she atte nds to themover(s), she also stays in contact with her own experience, noting herbodily felt sense, feelings, images, sensations and thoughts.

S a n t a B a rb a ra u t h e n t ic M o v e m e n t G r ou pFor f if teen years our authe ntic m ovement group has met on a monthlybasis. Some membe rs of the group hav e left, new people have joined. Wehave experimente d with how we structure our movement and witnessingtime and with th e use of clay, art ma teria ls and writing. The practice ofauthentic movement has asked us to develop our internal witnesses andto learn about our responses to others through the containme nt of thewitnessing experience.

For some of us, this wor k has pr ovided a core for our a rt and ourwriting. For others, like myself, this group has been a training groundand a laboratory. It has informed my clinical work, teaching me amongother things, about being wit anot her h um an being. For all of us, thepractice of authentic movement continues to deeply feed our souls.

For a time I felt a treme ndou s gap between what was able to happ en intrainings with my colleagues, and what was possible in a hospital orresidential treatment program. I could not transfer what we did in thestudio to the hospital, or even to most of my pri vate clients. I have hadfew clients and fewer groups with whom I could adopt the form in itstotality. I began to modify the form, drawing from it basic principleswhich have become the un derpinnings of my dance the rapy practice.


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u t h en t ic M o v e m e n t 9

I recognize th at some of wha t I offer here ma y not be new, as dancetherapists have been working in these ways for many years, with notraining in authentic movement. However, for me, authentic movementhas been the vehicle for the unde rstand ings I share here. It has great lyenriched and deepened my practice as a therapist.

n n e r L is t e n in gAt the he art of both dance therapy and a uthenti c movemen t is a belief inthe wisdom of the body. Both in theoretic al formula tions and in practicalapplications, dance thera py and au thenti c movement involve attent ion tothe ongoing strea m of bodily felt information. They share the essentialfeature of inner listening. In the context of auth entic movement, innerlistening involves an atten ding to images, sensations and feelings, andgiving them movement form. This allows the weaving and interaction ofemerging unconscious mate rial with the conscious elements of weight,time and space. Inner listening is often spoken about as ~surrender ,because it involves giving in to the unknown and waiting for the bodily-felt sense, rat he r th an ma ki ng s ometh ing happen. Adler (1987) describesthe inner listening process for the mover:

The mover works with eyes closed in order to expand her experience oflistening to the deeper levels of her kinesthetic reality. Her task is torespond to a sensation, to an inner impulse, to energy coming from thepersonal unconscious, the collective unconscious, or the super-conscious. Her response to this energy creates movement that may bevisible or invisible to the witness. (p. 2)The importance of the capacity for inner listening is tha t it makesavailable the client's ongoing experiencing. This experiencing is the~'stuff' of an in-depth thera peu tic process. In addition, th e abilit y to listento, differentiate, acknowledge and respond to one's ongoing experiencin gleads to fuller and more mean ingful relationships with the self and withothers. Hawkins (1991) says that wholeness as a human being involvesthe ability to listen to what she calls the inner voice, and that

when one discovers that inner spirit and the inner voice is free tomake its own unique statement, then something magical happens tothe creator. Suddenly there is a new sense of trust, a confidence inself, and willingness to take greater risk as one reaches toward newgoals. (p. 115)Hawkin s believes tha t an ul tima te goal of dance therap y is helpingclients discover their own ~intuitive process as a way of order-i n g . . , inne r experiencing in a mea nin gfu l way (p. 109).


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9 S h ir a M u s i c a n t

D o s a m a n t e s - A l p e r s o n ( 1 98 3 ) p o s i t s a r e l a t i o n s h i p b e t w e e n e x p e r i e n c -i n g a n d s e l f - a c t u a l i z a t i o n . S h e n o t e s t h a t " s u c c e s s f u l t h e r a p y c l i e n t sm o v e i n d i r e c t io n t o w a r d s i n c r e a s e d a c c e s s a n d u s e o f t h e i r e x p e r i e n c i n gi n r e l a t i o n t o t h e m s e l v e s a n d o t h e r s " ( p. 1 51 ). S h e d e s c r i b e s a b i l i t i e s s h eb e l i e v e s a r e r e l a t e d t o e x p e r i e n c i n g a n d s u g g e s t s t e a c h i n g c l i e n t s t h es k i l l s n e c e s s a r y f o r i n n e r l i s t e n i n g .

T h e c a p a c i t y t o t u n e i n t o o n e ' s e x p e r i e n c i n g i s a c a p a c i t y t h a t I c o n t i n u -a l l y l o o k f o r a n d s t r i v e to d e v e l o p i n b o t h m y g r o u p w o r k a n d w i t hi n d i v i d u a l c l i e n t s . T h e s t r u c t u r e p r o v i d e d f o r i n n e r l i s t e n i n g i n t h e h o s p i -t a l m a y l o o k v e r y d i f fe r e n t f r o m t h e s t r u c t u r e p r o v i d e d f o r a h i g h f u n c-t i o n i n g c l i e n t o r a g r o u p o f a u t h e n t i c m o v e m e n t s t u d e n t s , b u t i ts p u r p o s ei s t h e s a m e : t o p r o v i d e t h e s a f e t y n e c e s s a r y t o a t t e n d t o t h e o n g o i n g f lo wo f e x p e r i e n c e .

T h e f o l l o w i n g i s a d e s c r i p t i o n o f a h o s p i t a l g r o u p w h i c h I f e l t c o u l dt o l e r a t e a n d b e n e f i t f r o m s o m e i n n e r l i s t e n in g . A l l s i x p eo p l e , r a n g i n g i na g e f r o m 3 0 t o 60 , h a d b e e n i n a t l e a s t o n e o f m y p r e v i o u s g r o u p s . M o s tw e r e d e p r e s s e d a n d t w o h a d s u b s t a n c e a b u s e i ss u e s .

W e b e g a n s i t t i n g : L i z , J e a n , B o n n i e , K a r e n , R i c k a n d A l e x . O u rb e n d i n g a n d s t r e t c h in g e v e n t u a l l y l ed u s t o t h r o w i n g . W e s to o d sot h a t o u r e n t i r e b o d y c o u ld p a r t i c i p a t e a s w e t h r e w o f f w h a t w e d i d n ' tw a n t f r o m t h e d a y , th e w e e k , t h e y e a r , a n d t h e d e c a d e I t w a s c le a rd u r i n g t h is w a r m - u p t h a t t h e g r o u p h a d s o m e c o h es iv e n e ss fr o m t h eh o s p i t a l m i l ie u ; t h a t t h e r e w e r e a l so s o m e t e n s io n s a n d d i f fe r i n gm o v e m e n t n ee d s; a n d t h a t m o s t g r o u p m e m b e r s w e r e a b l e t o s e lfd i r e c t, t e n d i n g n o t t o f o ll o w m e u n l e s s I g a v e a v e r b a l c u e . J e a n , a no v e r w e i g h t w o m a n i n h e r l a t e th i r t ie s w h o w a s w i t h d r aw i n g f r o mc o c ai n e w a s t h e e x c e p ti o n . J e a n t e n d e d t o r e p r o d u c e m y m o v e m e n t a sw e c o n t i n u e d a n e x p l o r a t io n o f t h r o w i n g , g a t h e r i n g , h o l d i n g a n dr e l e a s i n g . W e c a m e t o a s t o p p i n g p l a c e , m o s t p e o p l e s ti ll h o l d i n g t h e i ro w n a r m s o r s h o u ld e r s . A s t h e e n d i n g h a d s e e m e d t o co m e o r g a n -i c a ll y , I a s k e d p e o p l e t o n o t i c e i f t h e r e w a s a f e e l i n g q u a l i t y t o t h e i rp h y s i c a l p o s i t i o n a n d t o s a y a f e w w o r d s a b o u t it , e i t h e r t o t h e m s e l v e so r o u t l o u d . R i c k s a i d ~ % n e l y " ; B o n n i e s a i d ' ~ p r ot e ct e d "; K a r e n s a i d% a k i n g c a r e o f m y s e l f ' ; J e a n s a id s h e r e m e m b e r e d a t i m e w h e n s h ed i d t a k e c a r e o f h e r s e l f.A l t h o u g h w e w e r e r e s t in g , t h e t h e m e s f e l t v e r y a l i v e a n d s o Is u g g e s t e d t h a t w e e a c h m o v e o n o u r o w n to c o n t i n u e e x p l o r i n g t h et h e m e t h a t h a d e m e r g e d . A t th i s p o i n t I d i d a l i tt l e e d u c a t i n g a b o u tf o c u s i n g i n w a r d l y a n d t h e r e b e i n g n o r i g h t o r w r o n g m o v e m e n t s .T h e r e w a s s o m e n e r v o u s n e s s a n d s o I g a v e f u r t h e r s t r u c t u r e: f o l d i n ga n d u n f o l d i n g ( c lo s in g a n d o p e n i n g ) i n a r m s , b o d i e s, h a n d s , e tc . (M o s tw e r e s ti ll s t a n d i n g w i t h a r m s f o ld e d a r o u n d t h e m s e l v e s ) . T h i s s e e m e dt o a d d r e s s t h e n e r v o u s n e s s a s p e o p l e f o u n d t h e i r p l a c e in t h e r o o m a n db e g a n t o t u r n i n w a r d l y . I w i t n e s s e d a s t h e y m o v e d f o r a b o u t 4 m i n -u t e s . B o n n i e , R i c k , a n d K a r e n w e r e h i g h l y i n v o l v e d a n d I f e l t c o u l dh a v e g o n e o n l o n g e r. J e a n l e ft t h e r o o m t o g e t a d r i n k o f w a t e r( a t t e n d i n g t o h e r e x p e r ie n c e , t a k i n g c a r e o f h e r s e l f a n d d e f e n d i n gh e r s e l f a l l a t o n ce ) a n d L i z a n d A l e x o p e n e d e y e s , p e e k e d a r o u n d , a n d


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s e e m e d t o w a i t i t o u t . W e t a l k e d a f t e r t a k i n g s o m e t i m e t o r e f le c t a n dt o t r a n s i t i o n b a c k t o t h e g r o u p . R i c k s p o k e o f f l y i n g a n d t h e f e e l i n g o fb e i n g a b l e t o l e a v e s o m e t h i n g b e h i n d . H e h a d t h e e x p e r i e n c e o fd i s t a n c e fr o m h i s g r o w n s o n' s p r o b l e m s - a n e x p e r i e n c e h e n e e d s t oc u l t i v a t e f o r h i m s e lf . B o n n i e f o u n d t h a t s h e c o u l d n 't % p e n , t h a t s h en e e d e d t o k e e p a w a l l u p a n d s o m e p r o t e c ti o n . I t b e c a m e c l e a r f o r h e rt h a t t h e r e w e r e s o m e i m p o r t a n t w a y s s h e d i d n o t y e t fe e l s a fe i n h e rm a r r i a g e . A l e x s a id t h e o n l y w a y h e f e l t s a fe w a s i n h o l d i n g h i m s e l f .K a r e n d e s c ri b e d a f a n t a s y t h a t s h e h a d d a n c e d w i t h h e r h a n d s : w i l dd u c k s t h a t s h e u s e d t o f e e d a s a c h i l d , f l y i n g a w a y , r e t u r n i n g . S h ec o u l d f e e d t h e m b u t s h e c o u l d n 't o w n t h e m . S h e m a d e s e n s e o f t h i s i nt e r m s o f a n i n j u r y s h e h a d s u s t a in e d a n d h e r f e e l i n g o f l if e b e i n g o u t o fc o n t r o l. L i z c h o s e n o t to t a l k . A n d J e a n r e p o r t e d t h a t s h e h a d s o m ed i f fi c u lt y c o n c e n t r a t in g b u t t h a t s h e 's b e t t e r a b l e t o e a c h d a y .I t h e n a s k e d e a c h p e r so n to s h a r e a m o v e m e n t o r a g e s tu r e f r o m th e i re x p e r i e n c e a n d h a v e t h e g r o u p j o i n t h e m i n i t. B e c a u s e o f t h e t i m e s p e n tm o v i n g a l o n e , i t s e e m e d i m p o r t a n t t h a t s o m e o f e a c h p e r s o n 's e x p e r i e n c eb e w i t n es s e d b y t h e o t h e r m e m b e r s o f t h e c o m m u n i t y . T h e c o m m u n i t ya n d , i n a t l e a s t t h r e e c a s e s , t h e i n d i v i d u a l s w e r e s t r e n g t h e n e d b y t h e i ro w n i n n e r j o u r n e y s a n d t h e s u b s e q u e n t s h a r in g .

N o t e v e r y o n e i s a b l e t o s u s t a i n a n i n n e r f o c u s , o r i s a b l e s a f e l y t o d o so ,e v e n i n th i s l im i t e d a n d s t r u c t u r e d m a n n e r . F o r s o m e , t h e a b i l i t y t oa t t e n d i n s i d e i s l i m i t e d b y i l l n e s s , p a i n , c h r o n i c u s e o f m e d i c a t i o n , o rp e r s o n a l i t y s t r u c t u r e . O f te n , w h e n t h e o p p o r t u n i t y i s p r e s e n t e d , t h ec l i e n t w i l l s i m p l y n o t p a r t i c i p a t e a s d id J e a n i n th e s e s s i on d e s c r i b e da b o v e , o r w i l l d o so i n a v e r y l i m i t e d m a n n e r a s d i d A l e x a n d L i z . T h ec a p a c i t y to s u s t a i n a n i n n e r f o c u s s e e m s t o r e q u i r e a c e r t a i n a m o u n t o fi n n e r s a f e t y .

T h i s s a f e ty , I b e l i e v e , c o r re s p o n d s t o w h a t D o s a m a n t e s - A l p e r s o n ( 19 8 3)c a l ls t h e ~ ' .. . a b i l i t y t o p e r c e i v e o n e ' s s e l f a s t h e c e n t e r o f o n e ' s e x p e r i e n c e( i n t e r n a l l o c u s o f c o n t r o l) (p . 1 51 ). W h e n t h e u n c o n s c i o u s m a t e r i a l b e -c o m e s o v e r w h e l m i n g , o r p a r t i c u l a r l y f r i g h t e n i n g o r p a i n f u l m e m o r i e st h r e a t e n t o i n t r u d e , i t i s s i m p l y n o t s a f e t o go in s i d e . S o m e c l i e n t s ~ 'k n owt h i s a n d c o m m u n i c a t e t o t h e t h e r a p i s t a n e e d f or a h i g h l y s t r u c t u r e d ,o u t e r - d i r e c t e d m o v e m e n t e x p e r i e n c e . O t h e r s d o n ' t . C h r is , c l i n i c a l l y d ia g -n o s e d w i t h a m u l t i p l e p e r s o n a l i t y d i s o rd e r , h a s t a u g h t m e a lo t a b o u ts a f e ty . A n a t u r a l , t h o u g h u n t r a i n e d , d a n c e r , s h e w a s i m m e d i a t e l y a th o m e i n t h e m o v e m e n t g r o u p . H e r a b i l i ty t o se l f - d ir e c t l e d m e t o t r y s o m ei n n e r l i s t e n i n g w o r k w h e n o t h e r g r o u p m e m b e r s a ls o s e e m e d r e a d y .C h r i s w a n t e d t o w o r k t h i s w a y . B u t , i n e v i t a b l y , C h r i s w o u l d c lo s e h e re y e s , b e g i n t o m o v e , a n d S h e l l e y w o u l d e m e r g e : a t e r r i f i e d c h i ld h i d i n g i na c lo s e t f r o m a p a r e n t - a b u s e r . W h i l e i m p o r t a n t m a t e r i a l f o r C h r i s c o u l db e a c c e s s e d t h r o u g h i n n e r d i r e c t e d m o v e m e n t , t h e s w i t c h i n g s i g n a l l e d tom e t h a t C h r i s d i d n o t h a v e t h e e g o s t r e n g t h t o c o n t a i n a n d a d d r e s s t h ef e a r . W e w o r k e d w i t h o u r e y e s o p en , in a m o r e i n t e r p e r s o n a l f a s h i o nw h i l e C h r i s w a s i n t h e g r o u p .


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9 Shira Mu sicant

There are clients for whom safety is not at issue but who have difficultyfor a varie ty of other rea sons (some mentio ned above) in con tacting theirbodily-felt sense. Creating opportunities in movement experiences fornu rt ur in g the ability to listen inwar dly is an ongoing focus of my work. Amove men t warm-up can be de signed to elicit the capacity for inne r listen-ing. Qu estions such as ~How is you r spine today? ... Can your bre athsupport your stretching? ... What do your feet have to say about thingstoday? ask clients to pay a ttentio n to sensation as they loosen up at thebeginning of a group. As we progress into rh yth ms and mov ement th athave an affective connotation such as shaking, punching, reaching, hid-ing, withdrawing, expanding and so on, I continue to ask questions andmake state ments th at facilitate inner listening. For example, I migh t aska client to notice which movement qualities are especially comfortabletoday, which aren't, and to notice how they know. Ongoing reference toone's own experience, parti cularly while moving, usu ally he ightens theability to focus. When, however, a client is psychotic, or unable to orga-nize inner experience, movement process without the accompanying selfreflection is more effective as it allows the client to rely on an outerstructure for self organization.

Authentic movement is a possibility that I carry with me into eachclinical situation. Thus the question of the appropriateness of authenti cmovement is continually alive. Sometimes I find we must pay a ttentio nto each other, to our environment, or to simply being in a group orrelationship. Other times it is possible to explore inner life throug h someinner listening work for a brief time. And there are times when groupmembers or individuals are ready for some variation of the authe nticmovement form and the depth it has to offer. Authentic movement hashighlig hted for me the importance of inner listening in the therapeuticprocess. In m y practice, it ha s become impo rtan t to find ways to developeach person's capacity to listen deeply to his or her experiencing.

W i t n e s s i n gThe witness is an essential component of authentic movement, and Ibelieve offers mean ingf ul contributions to the practice of dance ther apy.As therapists, we also witness. In witnessing, it is hoped that our rela-tionship with a client helps transform the client's relationship to his/herself. The following discussion focuses on the developmen t of the inte rna lwitness an d the use of witne ssing in dance thera py groups, and howwitnessing transforms the relationship to the self.

Adler (1985) describes the process of developi ng the in te rna l witness. Itbegins with being seen by another, just as the development of a hea lthy


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s e l f b e g i n s w i t h b e i n g ~ 'h eld b y a n o t h e r . A f t e r b e i n g s e e n b y a n o t h e r , o n eb e g i n s t o s e e o n e s e l f . T h e i n t e r n a l w i t n e s s i s d e v e l o p i n g . I t i s a t t h i s p o i n ti n A d l e r 's m o d e l t h a t o n e is a b l e to w i t n e s s a n o t h e r . A n d f r o m t h i sw i t n e s s i n g o f a n o t h e r c o m e s a n e w a b i l i t y to s e e o n e s e l f . '~ T he d e e p e s tl o n g i n g n o w h a s s h i f te d f r o m b e i n g s e e n a s I a m b y a n o t h e r , t o s e e i n ga n o t h e r a s s h e i s , t o s e e i n g m y s e l f a s I a m (p . 1 6) . T h i s m o d e l d e s c r i b e s ag r o w t h p r o c e s s . I t a l s o s u g g e s t s a f o r m a t f o r e x p l o r i n g a u t h e n t i c m o v e -m e n t : t h a t o n e b e w i t n e s s e d b e f o r e o n e w i t n e s s e s .

B u t w h a t i f o n e w a s n e v e r a d e q u a t e l y w i t n e s s e d a s a c h i l d , a n d t h e r e i sn o t t i m e f o r t h e h u g e a m o u n t o f w i t n e s s i n g i t w o u l d t a k e f o r t h e c h i ldi n s id e t o f e e l s e e n ? W e p r o b a b l y a l l s e e n u m e r o u s p e o p l e w i t h v a r i a t i o n so f t h i s e a r l y w o u n d - n o t h e ld , p r o te c t e d , h o n o r e d o r s e e n a s i n f a n t s a n dc h i ld r e n . C a n w e t e a c h s e l f - w i t n e s s i n g ? C a n t h e r e b e r e l a t i o n s h i p , aw i t n e s s i n g o f a n o t h e r ? I b e l i e v e i n t h e r a p y w e t r y t o d o b o t h : to t e a c h s e l fw i t n e s s i n g a n d t o t e a c h a b o u t b e i n g i n r e l a t i o n s h i p .

S o t h e a b i l i t y to w i t n e s s b o t h s e l f a n d o t h e r i n a c o m p a s s i o n a t e , n o n j u d g -m e n t a l m a n n e r i s a sk i l l I f in d m y s e l f r e f e r r i n g t o a n d t e a c h i n g b o t h i ng r o u p s a n d i n i n d i v i d u a l w o r k . W i t h d e v e l o p m e n t o f t h e i n t e r n a l w i t n e s s a sm y g o a l fo r m y c l i e n t , I m u s t o f t e n b e s a t i s f i e d w i t h a l it t l e b i t o f t h e i rf e e l i n g s e e n , a l i t t l e b i t o f t h e i r s e e i n g a n o t h e r . T h e f o l lo w i n g e x a m p l e i ll u s-t r a t e s t h e i n t e g r a t i o n o f w i t n e s s i n g i n a n o n - g o in g m o v e m e n t g r o u p .

A l i c e h a d d i f f i c u l t y m o v i n g . B e s i d e s h e r o b e s i t y , h e r i l l n e s s w a sp r o g r e s s i n g i n t o m u s c l e s h e a t h e s c a u s i n g h e r a g r e a t d e a l o f p a i n .E v e n t u a l l y s h e w o u l d b e c o m e b l in d . A l i ce w a s i n a n o n g o i n g m o v e -m e n t g r o u p f o r t h e m e m b e r s o f a r e s i d e n t ia l t r e a t m e n t p r o g r a m .S o m e o f t h e r e s i d e n t s w e r e c o n s i d e r e d c h r o n i c a l l y m e n t a l l y i ll . O t h e r sw e r e m a k i n g t h e t r a n s i t i o n f r o m h o s p i t a li z a ti o n t o in d e p e n d e n t l iv -i n g . A t f ir s t A l i ce c o u ld m o v e w i t h u s a n d t h o s e s e s s i o n s w e r e r i c h a n dm e a n i n g f u l fo r h e r . G r a d u a l l y , s h e h a d t o w a t c h a n d w o u l d s o m e t i m e ss k i p g r o u p b e c a u s e o f h o w e m o t i o n a l l y p a i n f u l i t w a s t o s e e o t h e r sm o v e . I t w a s a t t h i s p o i n t t h a t I b e g a n t o t e a c h w i t n e s s i n g t o t h i sg r o u p . B e c a u s e i t w a s o n g o i n g , a n d a f a i r l y c o n s i s t e n t g r o u p , I f e l t Ic o u ld t a k e t i m e a n d t e a c h o v e r t i m e . W e t a l k e d a b o u t t h e d i ff e re n c e si n w a t c h i n g f r o m a c o m p a s s i o n a t e p l a c e a n d w a t c h i n g f r o m a c o m p a r -a t i v e o r j u d g m e n t a l p l ac e . W e e x p l o r e d th e q u a l i t y o f p r e s e n c e a n da t t e n t i o n , n o t i n g h o w d i f f i c u l t a t t e n d i n g i s w h e n o n e i s o v e r -m e d i c a t e d . W e t a l k e d a b o u t t h e m i n d f u l n e s s t h a t s u p p o r t sw i t n e s s i n g - t h e a b i l it y to b e w i t h a n d w a t c h a n o t h e r w h i l e al s o f ol-l o w i n g o n e ' s o w n f e e li n g s , t h o u g h t s , f a n t a s i e s , a n d s e n s a t i o n s . W ed e v e l o p e d g u i d e l in e s a b o u t s p e a k i n g f r o m o u r w i tn e s s i n g . A n d w eu s e d w i tn e s s e s f o r a l l o f o u r m o v e m e n t s t r u c t u r e s. D u r i n g t h i s p r o-c e s s, A l i c e b l o s s o m e d . M i n d f u l a t t e n t i o n w a s , f o r t u n a t e l y , n o t d i f f ic u l tf o r h e r ( a s i t w a s f o r s o m e o t h e r s ).

T h r o u g h t h i s p r o c e s s a s a w i t n e s s , A l i ce b e c a m e a w a r e o f t h e r i c h n e s so f h e r o w n i n n e r l i f e. S h e h a d r e a d y a c c e s s t o i m a g e s a n d m e m o r i e s w h i c h


8/16

9 S h ira Mu s i can t

w e r e o f t e n q u i t e r e l e v a n t t o t h e m o v e r s s h e w i t n e s s e d . A s h e r f e e d b a c k t ot h e g r o u p b e c a m e v a l u e d , A l ic e w a s a b l e to e x p e r i e n c e h e r p l a c e i n t h eg r o u p , a n d u l t i m a t e l y , h e r p l a c e i n t h e l a r g e r c o l le c t iv e .

I t w a s d u r i n g o n e o f t h e s e s e s s io n s t h a t T r a c y , a n o t h e r m e m b e r o f t h eg r o u p d e s c r i b e d a b o v e , g a v e v o i ce t o a n i m p o r t a n t a s p e c t o f t h e w i t n e s s -t h e c o m p a s s i o n a t e o b s e r v e r . A f t e r a w a r m u p , I u s u a l l y a s k e d o t h e r s t ow i t n e s s w i t h A l ic e . O n th i s d a y , T r a c y w a s w i t n e s s i n g a s w e w e r e m o v i n gw i t h p a r t n e r s . A t o n e p o i n t , C a r l a a n d S u s a n b e c a m e v e r y f o c u s ed a n di n v o lv e d . L a t e r , a s T r a c y t a l k e d a b o u t h e r w i t n e s s in g , s h e d e s c r ib e d h o ws h e f e l t f u l l o f l ov e , h o w s h e c o u l d n e v e r h a t e s o m e o n e w h e n s h e w a t c h e dt h e m m o v e . S h e w a s s u r p r i s e d a t th i s c a p a c i t y i n h e r s e lf .

T r a c y ' s s t a t e m e n t w a s h e a l i n g i n t h e c o n t e x t o f t h e g r o u p a l so . C a r l ah a d d i f fi c u l ty f e e l in g s e e n a n d b e i n g a c c e p t e d in t h e g r o u p . M a n y o f h e rp e r s o n a l i n t e r a c t i o n s a l i e n a t e d o t h e r s . T r a c y w a s a b l e to s ee b e lo w t h ep e r s o n a l i t y l e v e l , t o t h e c o r e o f t h e p e r s o n , a n d t o b r i n g h e r v i s i o n t o t h eg r o u p .I n t h e a b o v e e x a m p l e s A l ic e a n d T r a c y w e r e n o t w i t n e s s i n g a u t h e n t i cm o v e m e n t a s i t l o o k s i n t h e s t u d io . B u t t h e y w e r e w i t n e s s i n g m o m e n t sa n d s o m e t i m e s m i n u t e s o f i n n e r d i r e c t ed m o v e m e n t . T h e w i t n e s s i n g f o rb o t h y o u n g w o m e n s e r v e d to d e e p e n t h e i r r e l a t io n s h i p t o t h e g r o u pm e m b e r s a n d , m o r e i m p o r t a n t l y , to t h e i r o w n i n t e r n a l w i t n e s s . A l ic e a n dT r a c y a l so d e v e l o p e d t h e i r a b i l i t y to w i t n e s s o v e r t i m e . T h e y b o t h h a db e e n w i t n e s s e d b y m y s e l f a n d b y o t h e r s i n t h e g r o u p .

I n a s h o r t t e r m s e t t i n g , I s o m e t i m e s u s e t h e f u n c t i o n o f t h e w i t n e s s t oi n c l u d e t h e n o n - m o v e r a n d t o c r e a t e s o m e s a f e t y fo r t h e m o v e r s w h o a r ec o n c e r n e d a b o u t b e i n g w a t c h e d . T h e f o l l o w i n g e x p e r i e n c e i s f r o m a s h o r tt e r m p s y c h i a t r i c u n i t .

W e b e g a n i n a l o o s e c i rc l e w i t h a s l o w w a r m - u p . A s w e r o t a t e d b o d yp a r t s a n d s t re t c h e d , L e sl ie s a t o n t h e c o u c h h u g g i n g h e r k n e e s . M yt h o u g h t w a s t o s o m e h o w b r i n g t h e g r o u p t o h o l d in g o u r s e lv e s a s aw a y o f i n c l u d i n g L e s l i e a n d l e t t i n g h e r k n o w s h e w a s s e e n . S o a s w ee x p l o r e d ~ g a t h e r i n g i n ", I s u g g e s t e d t h a t w e g a t h e r t o d i f f e r e n t p a r t so f o u r s e lf : to o u r m i d d l e s, o u r h e a r t s , o u r s h o u l d e r s , o u r f a c e s. W h e n Is u g g e s t e d t h a t w e t h e n h o l d o u r se l v e s a ft e r t h e n e x t g a t h e r i n g i n ,L e s l ie i m m e d i a t e l y d r o p p e d h e r a r m s f r o m h e r k n e e s a n d d r o p p e d h e rf e e t t o t h e f l o o r. I t f e l t t o m e l i k e a p r e t t y c l e a r s t a t e m e n t : ~ 'N o I w i l ln o t m o v e w i t h y o u " . Y e t L e s l i e di d n o t l e av e , t h o u g h s h e s h a r e d h e ra t t e n t i o n t o t h e g r o u p w i t h a n e a r b y n e w s p a p e r . T o w a r d t h e l a t t e rp a r t o f t h e g r o u p, I a s k e d t h a t w e m o v e i n p a i rs , u s i n g a m i r r o r i n gs t r u c t u r e . I s e t i t u p s o t h a t w e n e e d e d w i t n e s s e s , a n d a s k e d L e s l i ea n d a n o t h e r w o m a n ( w h o h a d s a t d o w n , s a y in g s h e w a s t i re d ) t o b e o u rw i t n e s s e s . L e s l i e a g r e e d . I b r i e f l y e x p l a i n e d t h e w i t n e s s r o l e a n d w ep r o c e e d e d w i t h t h e m i r r o r i n g . L e s l i e 's a t t e n t i o n w a s f o c u s e d t h r o u g h -o u t . S h e h a d f e e d b a c k fo r t h e m o v e r s a n d w a s c l e a r l y a t th i s p o i n t ap a r t o f t h e g r o u p . I n a s u b s e q u e n t g r o u p , L e s l i e c h o s e t o b e i n v o l v e dt h r o u g h m o v i n g .


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u t h e n ti c M o v e m e n t

W i t n e s s i n g w a s u s e d h e r e t o d r a w a b i g e n o u g h c i r c le a r o u n d u s toi n c l u d e L e s l ie . I n e f f ec t , t h e w i t n e s s p o s i t i o n a l l o w s a ~ n o" t o m o v i n g ,v a l u e s t h a t ~ 'n o", a n d a f f i r m s t h a t t h e r e i s a t i m e a n d p l a c e f o r s a y i n g~ n o" . I t a l s o a f f i r m s a p l a c e i n t h e g r o u p f o r t h e o b s e r v e r . I n a l a r g e rs e n s e , a s i n t h e e x a m p l e o f A l ic e , t h i s w a y o f a c t i v a t i n g t h e w i t n e s sc o m m u n i c a t e s t o th e g r o u p t h a t t h e r e i s r o o m f o r o u r d i f f e re n c e s .

T h e d e l i n e a t i o n o f t h e r o l e o f t h e w i t n e s s a l s o m a k e s i t s a f e f o r t h em o v e r s . T h e m o v e r s h e a r m e d e s c r i b e t o t h e w i t n e s s e s h o w t h e y a r e t ow a t c h f r o m t h e i r h e a r t s , w a t c h t h e i r o w n e x p e r ie n c e , a n d b e w i t h t h em o v e r s . D e s c r i b i n g t h e w i t n e s s f u n c t i o n t o t h e n o n - m o v e r s m a k e s s o m es a f e t y e x p l i c i t f o r t h e m o v e r : t h e w i t n e s s i s n o t t h e r e t o j u d g e t h e m o v e r .T h i s s a f e t y is e s s e n t ia l i f t h e m o v e r i s t o s t a y p r e s e n t w i t h h i s o r h e r o w ne x p e r i e n c e .

I n t h e e x a m p l e a b o v e , L e s l ie w i t n e s s e d a f a i r l y l o n g ( a b o u t 8 m i n u t e s )m i r r o r i n g s t r u c t u r e . I a l so u s e w i t n e s s i n g f o r v e r y b r i e f s t r u c t u r e s w h e nw e a r e t a k i n g t u r n s m o v i n g i n s o m e w a y . F o r e x a m p l e , w h e n e x p l o r i n g aq u a l i t y ( t i m i d i ty , a s s e r t i o n , s i n g l e m i n d e d n e s s , a m b i v a l e n c e , e tc .) , o n ep e r s o n a t a t i m e m i g h t m o v e a c ro s s t h e s p a c e a n d b a c k w h i l e t h e o t h e rp e o p le w i t n e s s . T h e s a f e t y p r o v i d e d b y t h e w i t n e s s i n g f u n c t i o n - a s b e s ta s i t c a n b e h e l d b y t h e w i t n e s s e s a n d a s b e s t a s it c a n b e % a k e n i n " b y t h em o v e r - s u p p o r t s t h e m o v e r ' s j o u r n e y a c r o s s t h e r o o m a n d b a c k .

T h e f o l l o w i n g d e s c r i p t i o n o f a s h o r t t e r m p s y c h i a t r i c g r o u p i l l u s t r a t e sf o r m e t h e t r a n s f o r m i n g p o w e r o f s e e i n g a n o t h e r a n d b e i n g s e e n b ya n o t h e r w h e n o n e m o v e s .

S e v e n o f t h e n i n e m e m b e r s w e r e i n t h e i r t w e n t i e s o r th i r ti e s : T e r r i ,A n n a , W e n d y , L i n d y , D a v id , S u s a n , a n d S t e v e. V i r g i n i a a n d L o r r a i n ew e r e i n t h e i r l a t e s i x t i e s . M o s t w e r e d i a g n o s e d w i t h d e p r e s s i o n o ra n x i e t y , t h o u g h A n n a w a s b u l e m i c a n d T e r r i h a d a s u b s t a n c e a b u s ed i a g n o si s . W e b e g a n w i t h a w a r m - u p , a s I f o ll o w e d t h e i r m o v e m e n ta n d e n e r g y cu e s. I n th e m o v e m e n t p ro c e s s t h e s t r u c t u r e e m e r g e d o fp a s s i n g a n i m a g i n a r y o b je c t f r o m o n e p e r s o n t o t h e n e x t . T h e r e w a s ah i g h l e v el o f i n v o l v e m e n t a s w e e a c h r e c e i v e d s o m e t h i n g , m o v e db r i e f l y w i t h i t, t h e n p a s s e d i t o n . T h i s w e n t a r o u n d t h e c i rc l e t w i c ea n d w h e n i t c a m e b a c k t o m e t h e s e c o n d t i m e , t h e g r o u p s u g g e s t e d I~ l e t i t g o " a n d '~ it" ~ T le w " a w a y . I s t a r t e d u s m o v i n g a g a i n f o l l o w i n gs o m e l i tt l e b o u n c e i m p u l s e s I s a w a n d t h e n r e a li z e d ( th e g r o u p ' s l a c ko f i n v o l v e m e n t h e lp e d m e h e re ) t h a t w e n e e d e d to t a l k - t h a t t h e r ew e r e s o m e i m p o r t a n t i m a g e s t h a t h a d s u r f a c e d in t h a t u s e o f o u ri m a g i n a t i o n s .W e n d y h a d h a d a n i m a g e o f a r a m s h o r n . T e r r i h a d a li t tl e e l f t h a th a d b e e n h e r i m a g i n a r y c o m p a n i o n i n c h il d ho o d . S u s a n h a d h e r b a b yi n h e r a r m s . O t h e r s s h a r e d t h e i r i m a g e s . T h e n M a r y ( a p s y c h i a t r i cn u r s e ) s h a r e d h o w i t fe l t w h e n S t e v e f l a t t e n e d h e r l a d y b u g a n d L i b b ys h a r e d s u r p r i s e t h a t h e r k i t t e n h a d t u r n e d i n to a l a d y b u g. W e b e g a nt o l o o k a t t h e l e t ti n g g o i n v o l v e d in p a s s i n g o u r i m a g e t o t h e n e x tp e r s o n . A d i s c u s s i o n f o ll o w e d a b o u t o u r p r o je c t io n s , i m a g i n i n g s , a n d


10/16

1 Sh i ra Mu s ican t

the feelings we had as we watched someone else move with theirimage. The group members appeared ready to witness each other.I chose to continue by work ing in dyads, mirroring. One dyad wouldmove at a time while the rest of the group witnessed. I suggested tha tin the mirroring, we allow our imaginations to speak and that thepartner be %vith" the mover rather than feeling they had to followexactly. Lindy and Wendy mirrored first. Wendy found a soft spiral-ing shape with some free flow. She later described movements of~'letting go". She also said she found a part of herself that was oka yand tha t she liked, and she hadn't been with th at part of herself in along time. It seemed important that this par t of her was witnessed bythe group and, through the movement, by her movement partner.Then Terri, who had moved back outside the group, said she wouldmirror even though she felt very alone. She asked Lorraine to be herpartner. Lorraine had come in late and was wishing she could be asexpressive as everyone else, but she couldn' t ~let go", felt "out of place"and felt she had no place anywhere. She did agree to stay and witness.Terri then asked Virginia, who doubted her ability, but agreed to doit. They moved together in chairs w ith a lot of physical contact. Therewas laug hter and playfulness and a high degree of involvement on thepar t of those watching. Virginia described her experience as reachingout to have someone touch her so she could relax. Terri's experiencewas of being the helper and being accepted. One witness saw a bridg-ing of the generations, a way tha t we are alike even though we may beyear s and lifestyles apart. David saw the accepting of another andhow this helps one feel okay about oneself. We discussed how havinganother see/accept us may be a way to see and accept ourselves andhow that was what was happening in this group Then David andSteve mirrored. Again there was physical contact initiated by David:handshak es and back pats. Then Steve initiated the movement. Therewas a very powerful sense of isolation and frustration which trans-formed as he began to bring his breathin g and his movement togetherin large openings and closings of his chest and arms. He ended bylooking at each of his witnesses in turn . He had gone throu gh a storyof his depression in tha t br ief movement sequence, and in the act ofsharing it with David and his witnesses, he looked and felt verydifferent. We came together in a circle and this time Lorraine joinedus. She commented on how beautiful Virginia and Steve looked(which they did ) and t hen it was pointed out how she looked She hadtaken the blank et off her shoulders and was quite animated. She wasnot comparing herself to others but rather sharing of herself as shespoke. We were transformed as a group and, in some cases, asindividuals-by our moving together, by being seen and by seeingeach other move.

I cont inue to explore how to bring witnessing to people who have notbeen adequately witnessed themselves. I t sometimes seems to have l im-ited significance, as in the earlie r examp le, allowin g Leslie to be includedin the group. In other cases, the significance is greater: Alice not onlyfoun d a valued place in the group, b ut w as also able to develop a relation -ship to her own internal witness that was to prepare her for her coming


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A u th e n t ic M o v e m e n t 1 1

blindness and a different relati onship to the world. Sometimes the use ofwitnes sing seems transfor mativ e, as in the session I described above. Butbecause of the natu re of the short term psychiatric unit, I often have nofollow-up. I don't know if the ~part of hersel f th at she liked" was able tohelp Terri deal wit h her cocaine addiction. Nor do I know if David wasable to take th at self-acceptance with him, or if Steve was able to know inhimself the tra nsforma tion the group was able to see in him. But I dobelieve tha t one such experience make s others possible. Perhaps Lorra inecan again find "her place".

P r o c e ss O r i e n t a t i o nI am enriched and deepened personally by my yea rs of working in authen-tic movement. This is true for me as therapist also. I am learning aboutbeing and doing, about waiting, about trusting a process, about beingwith another in a n on-interfering way as t hey experience pain an d joy. Iam also learning about intervening, an d setting boundaries an d limits. Iwould like to articulate these dimensions further as I believe they areinhe rent in dance therapy theo ry and methodology. Traini ng in authen-tic movement has made a direct contribution to these dimensions in myther apy practice.

a i t i n gBoth as a mover and as a witness, I have become familiar with waiting.As a mover I have waited for an impulse to move. And waited. It is ofcontinual amazement to me that when I do not know what is to comenext, I can wait, and something will come. As a witness, I wait with mymover. Another aspect to waiting is participation in the unknown. I amfamilia r with this experience also, and ye t a m continually surprised by it .I know it especially as a mover, when I am immer sed in my in ner world.The movement, the memories, the images, the sensations, the feelingsare not what I had planned-and are often not what I would have de-signed for myse lf from my conscious standpoint Afterw ard there m ay ormay not be new clarity. But there is the experience of havin g journey edinto the unknown.

As a therap ist I wan t to communicate to my clients tha t it is okay to notknow what is next, to wait in and with the unknown. Our work is oftenabout coming to new understandings with what was previously un-known. And we must go %here" to do that. Moreover, I- th e th er ap ist -d onot know for my client, just as I- th e wit ne ss- do not know for my mover.


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1 2 S h i ra Mu s i can t

W a i t i n g c a n s o m e t i m e s b r i n g e n o r m o u s f r u i ts . I t h i n k o f J o h n , a v e r yd e p r e s s e d e l d e r l y m a n , w h o a p p e a r e d a l m o s t c a t a to n i c . H e s a t in a na r m c h a i r i n t h e d a y r o o m o f t h e h o s p i t a l a s w e b e g a n g r o u p .

E a c h p e r s o n i n t h e c i r c l e w a s c o n t r i b u t i n g a m o v e m e n t s t a t e m e n ta b o u t h i m o r h e r s el f. A f t e r t h e p e r s o n i n t h e c i r cl e n e a r e s t J o h n h a dc o m p l e t e d h e r m o v e m e n t , I a s k e d J o h n i f h e w o u l d l ik e t o s a y s o m e -t h i n g i n m o v e m e n t a b o u t w h o h e w a s t o d a y o r h o w h e f el t. T h e r e w a sn o a n s w e r . T h e n s lo w l y , v e r y s l o w ly , J o h n b e g a n t o p u s h h i m s e l f u pf r o m t h e c h a i r. A s h e b e g a n , a p i ec e o f p a p e r f l o a te d o f f t h e a r m o f t h ec h a i r t o t h e f lo o r . J o h n s a n k b a c k i n t h e c h a i r a n d s l o w ly b e n t o v e r t or e t r i e v e t h a t p a p e r . T h e n h e s t u ff e d i t b a c k i n t o t h e p i l lo w s o f t h ec h a i r . H e w a s u n a b l e t o s t u f f e f f e c ti v e l y , h o w e v e r , a n d , a s h e r o s ea g a i n , t h e p i e c e o f p a p e r a g a i n f l o a t e d t o th e f lo o r . T h i s t i m e I r e -t r i e v e d i t a n d m a d e s u r e t h a t i t w o u l d n t fa l l a g a i n . I w a s c o n s c io u st h a t t h e f l o w o f m o v e m e n t a r o u n d t h e c i r cl e h a d d e f i n it e ly b e e nb r o k e n . I w a s a l s o a w a r e t h a t J o h n h a d i n d i c a t e d h e w a n t e d t o t a k eh i s t u r n i n t h e c i rc le . T h i s t i m e J o h n s to o d a l l t h e w a y u p a n d b e g a n -v e r y s l o w l y - a f e e t s h u f f l i n g d a n c e . A f t e r a m i n u t e h e s t o p p e d a n dt h e n s m i le d . T h e n h e s l o w l y s a t d o w n . I t w a s t h e m o s t e x p r e s s io n ,m o v e m e n t a n d r e la t e d n e s s t h a t a n y o n e h a d s e e n f r o m J o h n d u r i n gh i s s e v e r a l d a y s o n t h e u n i t . T h e g r o u p m e m b e r s s p o n t a n e o u s l y b r o k ei n t o a p p l a u s e . A n i n f e c t i o u s g o o d f e e l i n g p e r v a d e d t h e r e s t o f t h eg r o u p .

I t w o u l d h a v e b e e n e a s i e r to i g n o r e J o h n . H e w a s s i t t i n g o u t s i d e t h ec i r c le a n d a p p e a r e d t o b e o b l i v i o u s t o u s . I t i s i m p o r t a n t , h o w e v e r , t h a te a c h p e r s o n i n a g r o u p b e a c k n o w l e d g e d a n d s e en . B y a s k i n g f o r J o h n sc o n t r i b u t i o n , I t r y to c o n v e y t o t h e g r o u p t h a t e a c h p e r s o n h a s s o m e t h i n gt o o ff e r . B y w a i t i n g f o r J o h n , I t r y t o c o n v e y t h a t i t is o k a y t o t a k e t i m e f o rw h a t y o u h a v e t o s a y a n d t o w a i t f o r t h e i n n e r v o ic e t o e m e r g e . T h i s i so f t e n a n e w e x p e r i e n c e f o r p e o p l e . A n d i f w e a r e t o l i s t e n t o o u r b o d i l y - f e l ts e n s e , w e n e e d , a m o n g o t h e r t h i n g s , a f e e l in g t h a t w e c a n t a k e o u r t im e .W h e n s t r u c t u r i n g m o v e m e n t e x p e r i e n c e s , I h a v e f o u n d i t u s e f u l to ex p l i c -i t ly i n c l u d e w a i t i n g . W h e n w e a r e m o v i n g t h r o u g h t h e s p a c e o n e a t at i m e , I o f t e n a s k u s t o i n c l u d e a w a i t i n g t i m e a t t h e b e g i n n i n g . W h e nu s i n g m i r r o r i n g , I o f t e n a s k t h a t w h e n w e g e t t o t h o s e p l a c e s w h e r e w ed o n t k n o w w h a t c o m e s n e x t , w e s i m p l y w a i t , a n d o u r m i r r o r i n g p a r t n e rw i l l w a i t w i t h u s . S t i l ln e s s a n d l i s t e n i n g a r e v a l u a b l e a n d v a l u e d p a r t s o fo u r s e l v e s .

T h e s e s s i o n d e s c r i b e d b e l o w i l l u s t r a t e s t h e u n f o l d i n g o f a p r o c e s s , aw a i t i n g o n b o t h m y p a r t a n d t h e c l ie n t s p a r t , a n d a n e n t e r i n g i n t o t h eu n k n o w n . T h e c l i e n t is a 55 y e a r o l d w o m a n w i t h a c h i l d h o o d h i s t o r y o fp h y s i c a l , s e x u a l a n d e m o t i o n a l a b u s e . W e h a d b e e n w o r k i n g t o g e t h e rp r i v a t e l y f o r a b o u t a y e a r a t t h e t i m e o f t h i s s e s s i o n . P a t h a d b e e n t a l k i n ga b o u t h o w i m p o r t a n t i t w a s f o r h e r n o t t o s h o w a n y v u l n e r a b i l i t y w h e n af a m i l i a r , b u t u n c o m f o r t a b l e s e n s a t i o n a n d f e e l i n g e m e r g e d .


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A u t h e n t i c M o v e m e n t 1 3

I suggested she let herself pay a ttention to the feeling and just sort ofstay with it. She closed her eyes. Sometimes we were silent, some-times I asked a question to deepen her connection to her experience.She described a grey fog in her chest, its boundaries, its rubberyquality. As she stayed with her felt experience she began to shudderperiodically with an emphasis on her exhale. I t seemed to me as if herbreaths were aborted sobs. After a minute or so she had an image ofherself at about 7 years old standing outside and crying. As we paidattention to that memory, what came clearest for her was that shewas crying and that she was alone. When I asked about the quality ofthat crying, the word 'Tutile" just popped out and Pat began to sob.She sobbed for several minutes. As the sobs gradually diminished, Patcontinued to periodically shudder and brea th out, this time as if shewas very tired. I wanted to validate the reali ty of her childhoodexperience, so I said, ~'I just want to tell y ou tha t I see how hopelessyou felt as a child." And af ter a pause, "and how nobody probably evenknew that you were feeling so badly". At this statement she openedher eyes, put both ha nds out in front of her as if to say "whoa" and saidvery strongly, "And nobody is going to know how I feel I'm not goingto let my mother know " Then she shifted in her posture and looked atme. ~'That's when I decided," she said. "That feels like the time when Iknew I couldn't let an y of the pain show". As she said this and as wesat quietly with that information, Pat continued to shudder slightlyand to exhale with a little force. She said that it felt like wanting toget rid of something. Pat and I moved together for a few minutes,getting rid of, throwing, flinging and brushing off. I began to witnessas she continued with more involvemen t. At one point she said with alaugh. ~Tm glad I'm doing this in the ri ght company I couldn't havedone this at th e dinner table. I couldn't have done this in front of mymother." She continued to brush her chest and make expelling noises.When she sat down she said tha t t he memo ry of the dinner table keptcoming to her. She showed me where everyone sat. She sat across fromher mot her and next to the brother that molested her. As we sat in thepresence of Pat's family at dinner, she bega n to remember hermother's insistence on proper decorum at the table; how everyone,including herself, joined her mother's lie that everything was okay;her own proximity to her abusive brother; and her resolve to hide herpain. She began to understand the meanin g of the feeling that she hadas a child and still sometimes expe rie nces -th at grey fog in her chest.She associated it with the an ger and hurt she felt toward her mother,and the confusion and aloneness she experienced in having to keepthese feelings buried. As she processed this, she also made someconnections to her history of bronchial problems. She expressed a kindof satisfaction at the end of the session, of something coming to newclarity.

Pat has the emotional resources and motivat ion to l is ten deeply toherself and to explore what is unkn own. Her wil l ingness to wai t , to '~hangout" a t the edge of a feel ing, image or sensat ion, a l lowed the emergenc e ofanot her level of under stand ings. Also in this session, Pat had new experi-ences on which to bui ld new ways of seeing herself and her world. She


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1 4 S h ir a M u s i c a n t

again allowed her pain, confusion and anger to be seen by me; she wasaware th at she did not feel judged for that. She also became aware tha tshe had obtained this new informa tion from herself. She was beginnin g tofind hers elf reli able as a source for deep inne r knowledge; she wasbeginn ing to trus t herse lf as a cen ter of knowing.

n t e r v e n i n gIn au then tic mo vement, the witness contains her own impulses to move.In doing so, she has a unique opportunity to know something aboutherself, perhaps something about what calls her to action, what moti-vates her. With t he mindful a tten tion th at is asked of the witness for bothher mover and her own internal process, the witness can watch her ownimpuls e to comfort, to join, to withdra w, to stop, or to hide. She can ge t toknow the tension tha t m ust be borne in such containm ent. It is a tensionwe are all familiar with in a therap euti c context when we become awareof our own cou ntertra nsferen ce. Here we stop in ourselves or slow downan action or a sta tem ent tha t is essentially about ourselves. When we dohave an immedi ate strong reaction to a client s behavior or words, weoften take some time to sort the countertransferential material from auseful piece of informa tion about the client.

The process of witnessing is teach ing me about doing less, inter veni ngless and waiting more. So I wonder about the less visible aspects ofcountertransference. When do we intervene in order to o something,simply because we are the therapist and we are supposed to do some-thing? The model of the silent, observing witness asks me to questionwhen and for what rea sons I do interven e. When do I act on what I know,see, feel, sense, in tuit? In the the rap y process, I sometimes con tract witha cli ent (or group) th at th ey will move for a period of tim e and I will bewitness and timeke eper. In this wa y of working, it is set up that I notintervene until the time we agreed upon is up. But because my ultimateresponsibility is to my client, I must keep alive the question of whet her ornot to intervene based on what I see and understand about the process.

Christine helped me clarify the question of when to interve ne. She hadbeen in my group in the hospital and had then come to work with meprivately. Wha t I hadn t seen in the hospital, and wha t took me awhile torecognize, was tha t Christin e could use the mov emen t process not only toexpress her pain, bu t to give herself pain. A stretc h could be extendedmuch past t he point of comfort, a body part could be held in a way itwasn t m ean t to go, an angr y punc h could suddenly become a self-angrypunch as the pillow got flat and her hand began to bruise. I intervenedconsta ntly at first, often calling a halt to the mov emen t process as I sawthis woman inflict on herse lf the p ain t hat had bee n inflicted on her. It


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uthentic Mo vem ent 1 5

became clear tha t Christine was incapable of directing her own healing.Her need for my frequent interv ention signalled a new place of attenti onfor us and became the grist of our work for some time as Christi ne bega nto learn to respect and honor her own bodily experiences.Sometimes the need for intervention has been much less clear anddifficult to sort out from my need to in tervene. When I see someone stuck,or in deep grief, I am ~'on edge but muc h more ab le to be ~with . Whe n Isee pain or deep grief that doesn't find resolution on its own, or th at seemsto feed itself, perhaps with a repetitive or trance-like quality, I am mu chmore likely to intervene. Occasionally movement leads to involuntaryspasms in th e body and I do become active in worki ng with these. I havefound, in general, th at I intervene more a nd wait less with clients withmore borderline features.The question of when and why to inte rvene is, I believe, a useful one forall therapists. It rema ins an imp ortan t question for me as my trust in theorganic unfoldi ng of a process grows. The au the ntic m ovem ent labo ratoryhas been a place where I could explore my own impulses to move throu ghcontainment or through action. In this way I know a little more aboutwhy I intervene.

C o n c l u d i n g R e m a r k sDance therapy and authentic movement have a shared theoretical andmethodological atten tio n to the ongoing stre am of bodily-felt informa-tion. Inner listening, the ability to tune in to that information, can benurt ured and developed within the moveme nt therapy process. Althoughthe movement structure in hospital group therapy may look unlike anauthentic movement group, its purpose is nonetheless to provide thenecessar y safety for atte ndi ng to th e ongoing flow of felt experience, towhatever extent possible.

The concepts of the witness a nd the intern al witness which are centralto auth entic movemen t have much to offer the practice of dance therapy.In my group and individual work, I teach the ability to witness both otherand self in a compassionate, nonjud gmental manner. This can be trans-formative as group members come to see each other, and as individualslearn to turn their capacity for compassion on themselves. At the veryleast, group me mbers who choose not to move find inclusion in the groupthrough witnessing; while moving group members have safety needsabout being seen addressed, if not met.

My own experience as witness profoundly informs me as a therapist.The model of the silent, observing witness asks me to question wh en andfor what reasons I make any intervention. Witnessin g has deepened my


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1 6 Shira Mu sicant

o w n p e r s on a l c o m f or t w i t h w a i t i n g w i t h b e i n g w i t a n o t h e r . I t h a s a l s os h a r p e n e d m y c la r i ty o n i n t e r v e n i n g i n p r o c e s s e s t h a t h a v e s e l f d e s tr u c -t i v e e l e m e n t s . M o s t i m p o r t a n t l y m y e x p e r i e n c e a s a w i t n e s s k e e p s a l iv et h e q u e s t i o n o f h o w I i n t e r v e n e a s a t h e r a p i s t . I t is m y b e l i e f t h a t t h ed i s c i p li n e o f a u t h e n t i c m o v e m e n t c a n p r o vi d e a v a l u a b l e c o m p o n e n t i nt h e t r a i n i n g o f f u t u r e d a n c e th e r a p i s t s a n d in t h e c o n t i n u i n g e d u c a t i o na n d e n r i c h m e n t o f t h o s e a l r e a d y i n t h e f ie ld .

R e f e r e n c e sAdler, J. 1987, Winter). Who is the witness? Contac t Q uarter ly .Chodorow, J. 1986). The body as symbol: Dance/movement in analys is. In N. Schwartz-Salant and M. Stein, Eds.), T he body in ana ly s i s pp. 87-108). Wilmette, Illinois: ChironPublications.Dosamantes-Alperson, E. 1981). Experiential movement psychotherapy. In P.L . Bernst einEd.), Theore t ica l approaches in dance-movement therapy Vol . 1 pp. 145-163). Dubuque:Kendall/Hunt.Hawkins, A.M. 1991). Marion Chace Annu al Lecture: The intuit ive process as a force inchange. A m e r i c a n J o u r n a l o f D a n c e T h e r a py 13 2): 105-116.Whitehouse, M. 1963). Physical movement and personality. Paper presented at the Analyti-cal Psychology Club of Los Angeles, 1963.

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