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Back to school issue | August 2014

3www.UrbanParentingMagazine.com

CONTENTSFEATURES

FASHION

Tons ofSAVINGS!!

PARENTING

18 POSITIVE PARENTING TIPS FOR POSITIVE THINKING:Sometimes parenting can become a bit overwhelming. Here are some tips to create a new atmosphere in your home.

16 HOME IS WHERE THE SCHOOL IS. . .? WIth schoools becoming increasingly violent over the years, is home school-ing the best option for your child?

07 AFTER SCHOOL ACTIVITIES:How to these activities can build the relation-ship with your child.

22 WAYS TO COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR TEEN:Best forms of communication when dealing with teens.

12 VINTAGE STYLES FOR A NEW GENERATION: With all of the new trends these days, this one is sure to not only make an impact but save a tremendous amount of money as well.

Urban Parenting Magazine

4 www.UrbanParentingMagazine.com

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It’s almost that time of year! The Summer is almost over and our kids will be returning back to school be-fore we know it. Let’s enjoy the final days of the summer sun, beaches, pools and BBQ’s. Visit us online for all of your parenting, Back-to-school needs.

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LETTER from THE EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

It’s back to school time once again! For some of you- you’re on yearfive or ten, for others this is your child’s first or last.

Yet, what’s different about this year? What passion or drive will yousend your children to school with that will bring out their best? Whatlasting words will they keep in their memory banks for years tocome and then recall in priceless times of personal contemplation?

Well, as the summer winds down, here are a few words of inspiration toshare with your children that haveinspired generations:

“In all of your deeds the proper value for respect and time deter-minessuccess or failure.” – Malcolm X

“No matter what accomplishments you make, somebody helped you.” -Althea Gibson

“Don’t feel entitled to anything you didn’t sweat and struggle for.”-Marian Wright Edelman

“Winners never quit and quitters never win.”- Michael Jordan

In the end, no matter what quote or verse you choose to share withyour beloved, the words that will always matter the most are your own.

Remember, you are your child’s first role model, best friend, teach-er,mentor, and leader.

Shine on,

Debbie Manigat | Proud Wife & Mommy of 2


RELATIONSHIPbuilding activities

for you and your child

photo courtesy of BST12 Stock

After school activities are the rage of the day. With about $500 million invest-ed in these programs and more than 10 million children attending them in

America alone, the popularity of these activities cannot be overlooked. Everyone understands the need to develop new skills, gain more knowledge and keep the children safe when parents are working.The most important factor in the success of any program is the relationship between the children participating in the program and the adult mem-bers who work with these children.

Often, children may confide in an adult mem-ber who is not a teacher. This kind of emotional interaction

is a must when children are struggling to make sense of the whirlpool of emotions that assail them.

Direct contact with professionals can be an inspiring experience. Children are very much impressed by the knowledge and experience of these adults. Young people gain a lot of knowl-edge and experience when they deal with ex-perienced adults and older youth who serve as teachers or mentors in these programs. These mentors are different from the teachers in the school and children are more likely to draw in-spiration from them.

After school activities that are managed profes-sionally by people who are successful in their own fields of expertise will produce children who are more enthusiastic and successful. Meaning-ful interaction with adults is a learning experi-ence in itself.

Want to be a great parent? Want to raise a happy, healthy, well-behaved kid? The secret to this is to provide well rounded activities

for your child on a daily basis.

“activities that are managed professionally by people who are successful in their own fields of expertise will produce children who are more enthusiastic and successful.”

IDEAS & PARENTING TRICKSAfter School

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Children don’t need preschool to gain admis-sion to kindergarten or to succeed in life. In fact, the wrong preschool experience could

potentially set a child back by creating a negative perception of school, learning, and socializing. How-ever the right preschool experience can give a child a head start academically and socially over peers without preschool.

In order to make the right choice for your child you need to look at what a preschool program should do for children. Ideally, preschool should help inte-grate children socially so they learn about the rules and structures of society in general and school society in particular. In addition, preschool helps

students begin a foundation of academic knowl-edge including literacy, numbers, and culture.

The actual content, focus, and structure of pre-school programs varies widely from community to community (and often even within communities) but most programs achieve these two primary goals for students. However a parent can easily accomplish similar goals without the confines of a specific preschool program.

Obviously many families need to arrange some type of day care for the preschool age children and if this is the case then it often makes sense to combine day care and preschool.

Does yourchild need

Preschool?



Children who regularly attend day care programs with other children are less likely to need the social aspects of a preschool education. They likely learned how to play with others, the rules of shar-ing, and how to follow instructions and other key social lessons. Similarly children who belong to a large family or live in a neighborhood where a group of children regularly interact need less social

education than children who do not regularly in-teract with their peers. Parents can replicate these social situations by seeking out play groups and community activities.

It is fairly easy to create a home preschool pro-gram for children. There are packaged curriculums available for purchase, materials available from local libraries, and information available on the internet. You can choose a program created entire-ly by someone else or create your own individual program to suit you and your child. Some television programs even offer additional material on the in-ternet to supplement programming that would be suitable for a homeschooling project.

A motivated parent can certainly create a quality preschool program for their child that exceeds the results of any professional program. It is simply important to keep in mind your primary goals. What do you want your child to learn? What skills do you want your child to master? Do you simply want to prepare your child for kindergarten or do you have more advanced goals in mind?

The right preschool program can definitely give children a head start on long-term educational success, but not all programs are created equal and sometimes even a wonderful preschool program isn’t right for certain children. Some children may benefit more from spending another year or two in a more nurturing atmosphere, such as home or a small day care. When making the preschool deci-sion it is important to consider the individual child as well as the individual programs available. It is

not a one-size-fits-all decision.

“. . .the wrong preschool expe-rience could potentially set a child back by creating a nega-tive perception of school, learn-ing, and socializing. However the right preschool experience can give a child a head start academically and socially over peers without preschool.”

“A motivated parent can certainly create a quality preschool pro-gram for their child that exceeds the results of any professional pro-gram. It is simply im-portant to keep in mind your primary goals. “



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With all of the new trends these days, this one is sure to not only make an impact but save a tremendous amount of money as well.

It’s the hottest thing to hit the streets! Some say it’s even hotter than that video of the Disney kid. Yes, that’s right hotter than that!

But what is this hotter than hot new fad that’s sweeping the streets and every crevice of the country’s high society? It is none other than Vintage Clothing. That’s right, something that old is the newest hit of the modern fashion scene and almost everyone is hooked.

What makes it so special? Well, aside from the fact that it is not as hard to find as the last piece of clothing Beyonce wore to the Gram-my’s, it is also as good as free (that’s if you could find old clothes mom and dad wore when they were hitting it up back in the days). That and probably because even Hollywood big names are getting in to it as well. Vintage is all the rave of people especially the new genera-tion of individuals with a good fashion sense and a good eye for a beautiful piece of clothing.

Vintage Styles



But what kinds of clothes can we actually call vin-tage clothing and what are those that are not. Well, one fact remains true for the generation that was then and that is now, whatever looks good and has good quality can be qualified as vintage clothing. The reason behind this is because there is no actu-al rule that applies to what vintage clothing is and what is not. Basically the main principle in finding and using vintage clothes is all up to the person looking at it.

But if there are no rules then it may come out as something that anything that we can dig up from the attic can be vintage item. Well, for that matter it’s a yes. Anything that we dig up our house’s attic has the potential to be called a piece of vintage clothing. It’s really up to us to carry it around and make it look good. But here are a few tips on how and what we could put on that people can say that it’s vintage clothing.

Age-the year that the clothes play a major dis-tinguishing factor to the “Vintage-ness” of it. Age pertains to the year that the piece of clothing was made and originally sold. Basically, the older the material the better, as many would agree.

Quality-if the piece of clothing is as good as the day it rolled of the assembly line the better the val-ue. If you are planning to have Vintage clothing as a form of business then quality is definitely some-thing you have to consider.

Functionality-regardless of the style, age and quality of the material if you can’t really use it then it’s as good as trash to anybody. Make sure that the material you choose is still functional and not a total waste of effort.

Uniqueness-of course you also have to consider the uniqueness of your vintage clothing. If there are other people with the same print or design then it may be a good idea to look for other materials that you could use.

It’s not really rocket science if you want to get yourself a good find when it comes to Vintage clothing. All you have to have is a lot of patience, a good eye and a sense of personal style. Remem-ber that it the man that makes the clothes and not clothes making the man.

“Vintage is all the rave of people espe-cially the new gener-ation of individuals with a good fashion sense and a good eye for a beautiful piece of clothing.”

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Home is where the School is...?Home is you and your chil-

dren’s primary school. In it cognitive, emotional, spir-

itual and social aspects are de-veloped and honed. In fact, home contributed to the totality of your persona.

Home never ceases to be a school. It continues to be such in order to make and mold you. It can be a school ad infinitum.

Children are devoted to learn new things. This hunger for education exists within and outside the school. It is long-lasting and it follows the children. Thus, even if they are out of the basic institu-tion for education they can learn a lot.

Even if you are not enrolled in a university, you can still acquire knowledge. In addition, this learn-ing can be had without traveling much. Yes, you can have same knowledge that other students ac-quire even when you just stay at home. This system is called home schooling.

Home schooling, otherwise known as home education, is a curric-ulum designed for children to study at home. This is in contrary to the usual education offered by an education institution like the parochial or public school.

When parents feel that complete education can no way be acquired

in private or public schools, they resort to home schooling.

Home schooling is legal in all parts of the United States. How-ever, said laws may differ from one state to another. In fact, home schooling evolves around three categories. They are private school laws, equivalency laws and home education laws. Inquiry must be done first in order to know which of the three laws are suited to you and your children.

Home schooling is the focal point of a substantial minority in the United States. This minority is composed of parents who desire to give their children the best education that they can get.

Home schooling is also given to gifted children who are given special attention in connection with their talents and abilities. Most school failed to meet the attention necessary. Thus, parents resort to home schooling as a remedy. Another reason for home schooling is the preservation of values and religion.

Undeniably, home schooling is the most thrilling innovation in education nowadays.

Making your kids stay at home to study will not make them social misfits. This is because a crowd is not necessary to learn to adjust socially. Adequate exposure and

proper guidance are the things necessary to make your children acquainted with the world.

The concept of home schooling has started way back in 1850 when most of the American children learned their lessons at home. It has been 156 years since its inception but said concept continue to astound both parents and students.

Great changes have occurred in the past 25 years. In fact, said revival in the concept of home schooling has resulted to more and more children learning at home. In fact, the number has in-creased to three million and still growing...

With home schooling around, you can select the subjects that you can teach your child. You need not worry about several fields of concentration since they can take care of them when they are already young adults or teenagers.

Learn first what your child is interested in learning. Also dis-cover their skills and talents. From there, you can have the idea where to start. You will also be given the idea on what lessons and activities to give emphasis.

Teach your children to live their dreams. Start by giving them a good home schooling background.



Home is where the School is...?



20 Tips to

positive thinking

for parents

1. Start the day with cheers and smiles.

Your whole day depends on how you greet the morn-ing. Therefore, as long as you welcome it with energy and high spirits, everything will go okay. You don’t want the rest of the day to get ruined, do you? Come on, smile! It doesn’t cost anything but is worth every-thing.

2. Ask for guidance.

Only God knows what we will be having on the day ahead of us. He will surely appreciate a few minutes of praying and asking for guidance from Him. Also, have faith on Him that He is more than willing to grant our requests as long as it is for our own good. With God as our guide, we don’t have any reason not to say and believe in the thought that I can do this. I can make it through this day. Nothing is impossible. After all, God is with me.

Sometimes parenting can become a bit overwhelming. Here are some tips to create a new atmosphere in your home.



3. Plan the day ahead.

To avoid mistakes that will cause negative out-put on your daily activi-ties that will later on be-come negative thoughts, it is better to plan your work first; after which, work your plan. Make sure today’s goals are clearly defined and absorbed by your mind. This can be done even before you get out of bed each day, just so immediate addressing issues as they arise can be avoided.

4. Keep your mind fo-cused on important things.

Set goals and priorities for what you think and do. Visualize practicing your actions. Develop a strategy for dealing with problems. Concentrate on things that need to be taken seriously, but at the same time, take time to relax and enjoy. This way, favorable results may take place.

5. Be detached from the outcome.

They say that life is like a Ferris Wheel; sometimes, you’re on the top, and sometimes at the bottom. This means that there will be times in our lives

where some things would not turn out according to what we want them to be. Don’t be annoyed if you don’t get what you desire. However, do your best in everything you do. Only, don’t get too attached on the probable results that may only cause disap-pointments and upsets.

6. Try new things and challenges.

See learning and changes as opportunities. There’s nothing wrong in chang-ing attitudes and routines as long as they are for the good and improvement of who you are and what you do. Doing new things may include considering more options for a proj-ect, meeting new people from different places, asking lots of questions. Through this, the flow of thinking is directed to im-provement and negative thoughts will be easily eradicated.

7. Balance your desires.

We live in a place of op-posites and duality ñ gain and loss, pleasure and pain, light and dark, male and female, love and hate. This is how the cycle of life goes. We can never have all the good things in life at the same time.

In love, there will always be someone who gets hurt. In wealth, there will always be people who will not be fortunate enough. Measure and mod-eration is the primary key. 8. Be realistic.

Make sure that what you want is some-thing possible. Hoping for something to happen which would never really materialize in real life will only bring you disap-pointment. For instance, you wish to lose weight. Therefore, you have to set a goal and act on appro-priate measures within a period of time to achieve what you wish. Hey, No one can get slimmer overnight.

9. Keep track of your mental and physical health.

This way, you will know

how far you can keep believing. Know yourself. There is

no other person in the world who can tell who you really are. Know your passions, favorites, and principles. Spend some quality time by yourself ñ reading, listening to mu-sic, day dreaming, and the likes. If you know yourself completely, you will be aware of how far can you go physically, mentally, and emotionally.

10. Love yourself.

Before you expect for other people to love and adore you, it is always you who needs to love your-



self first. Make a positive commitment to yourself, to learning, work, family,

friends, nature, and other worth-while causes. Praise yourself as much as you praise others once in a while. When you start feeling confident about yourself, positive thoughts will naturally flow to your mind.

11. Laugh.

Enjoy. Have fun. Looking at the brighter side of life starts with entertainment and pleasure.

Laughter is the best med-icine, so they say. Whether your illness is physical or emotional, a few laughs and giggles can help you throw away heavy baggage such as anxiety, disappointment, or ner-vousness.

12. Keep a list of your goals and actions.

Familiarize yourself with things you want to ac-complish and with the ways you must undertake to complete them. By the time you are certain of what you want to do and

carry out in your life, a stronger mind and will power will exist within you.

13. Associate with posi-tive people.

In every classroom, work place, or simply anywhere you go where there are groups of people, look for optimistic ones. There are lots of them, Iím sure. Associate with them, hang-out, discuss mat-ters. They can help you build self-confidence and self-esteem.

14. Make it a habit to ask questions.

This is not equal to dumbness and ignorance; rather, it is associated with seeking more infor-mation and understand-ing matters clearly. With more knowledge, there is also more power.

15. Be open.

We have to accept the fact that we don’t know everything. And that we are continuously learn-ing in every place we go, with every people we meet as everyday passes. We should not close our minds to new ideas and information that comes our way. Our mind is so

spacious that it is impos-sible to fill it up com-pletely. Thus, we should accept worthy things that may help us become bet-ter and brighter persons.

16. Have trust in other people.

Although it may seem difficult and risky to give trust to just any people, when you believe in them or confident on what they are doing for you, doubts and negative judgments on them will be unnec-essary. Also, it will bring harmonious relationships between you and your colleagues.

17. Forgive and forget.

Mistakes and failures are the root causes of nega-tive thinking. If we some-how learn to let go of all the pain, agony, and fear we try to keep inside our hearts and minds, then there will be nothing more to block our clear thoughts from being ex-pressed. Forgive yourself for committing mistakes and forget these mistakes.

18. Learn from experienc-es.

Learning inside the classroom is different from learning outside it.

In school, one learns the lesson first before taking an exam; while in real life, one takes the test first before learning the lesson. This test in the real life is our experi-ences. If we failed in that test, i.e. the experience is not so good, we study the situation and learn the lesson. From here, we can avoid committing the same mistake twice.

19. Count your blessings.

Focus on what you have rather than what you don’t have. Absence of our desires will only bring discontentment and disappointment that will only waste our time. Instead, be thankful and appreciative with all the blessings we receive.

20. Kiss your worries goodbye.

At the end of everyday, before going to sleep, there is no need to keep bad experiences and unhappy moments that had happened in the day within you. Let them go, throw them out of the window and kiss them goodbye. Dream sweetly. As a new day unfolds, new hope arises. Keep believ-ing. Always have faith.



GOOD ways to commu-nicate with your TEENThe teenage years are confusing for parents

and teens alike. Kids that once seemed open and full of sharing suddenly with-

draw.

As a parent, your primary concern may be foster-ing communication with your teen. Most parents struggle to get something other than a one word response from their teenager.

It’s important to understand that you have to be delicate when approaching your teenager. You want to engage your child in conversation without

putting them on the defense or causing them to withdraw.

While this can be challenging, the re-wards of doing this are great. There are a few key strategies you can adopt to ensure that you foster strong communi-cation and good ties with your teenag-ers.

Ask Indirect Questions to Facilitate a Conversation. If you ask your teenager a direct question you’ll probably end up with a one or two word response. Your goal should be encouraging them to talk about things from a broader perspective. To engage your child in a conversation about a particularly issue, consider ask-ing them about something related but not directly tied to the subject you are getting at. You’ll help them ease into a discussion of what is on their mind.

Talk With Your Teen About Their Inter-ests. Take an active interest in your teens interests. If they are doing something you don’t know anything about, consider

learning more about it so you can ask them inter-esting and exciting questions about their hobby or activity.

Listen to Your Teen and Avoid Lecturing. Most teens will shy away from conversation if their expecta-tion from that lecture is simply a lecture. You want your teens to know that you are interested in what they have to say. Withhold judgment at first and allow them to speak their mind.

Pay Attention to Non-Verbal Language. Your teen can send you many messages about what is on their mind through their non-verbal communica-tion. You can also engage them in communication by putting your arm around them or patting them on the back, encouraging them to open up to you.

Remember your goal should be sending the mes-sage to your teen that you are providing a safe and



nurturing environment where they can share their deepest concerns, fears and interests without fear of immediate reprimand or judgment.

Always take the time to accept your teen’s feelings even if you don’t agree with them. You have to lis-ten to your teen if you want them to open up. Avoid jumping in and offering suggestions immediately. Instead encourage your teen to look for answers in a positive way.

You can also encourage your teen to share more by sharing with them daily tidbits and insights into your life. Consider occasionally asking their advice or opinion on things.

You’d be surprised how much easier it is to get teens to open up once you adopt a few time tested strategies. Provide your children with a nurturing and loving environment, and they will more easily welcome you into their life.

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Missedopportunities

are the parents to

Blame?Being that this generation of individuals have been un-officially dubbed the “most entintled and narcissistic” of all generations. Would they than be responsible for the actions and opportunities that their children miss out on? Is that the child’s responsibility? When and where do parents draw the line between dependence and indepen-dence? Parent’s have undying love for their babies which grows stronger and stronger each and every day.

The infancy months where four hourly feeds are followed by the hand aching task of burping baby. Dribbles of milk flow through your fingers as the infant rests his/her weary scrunched up face in the palm of your hand fighting off the land of nod. What is baby thinking? As he/she loses the battle to stay awake.

Then we have the nightmare months of the toddler years where mum and dad need eyes in the back of their heads. It is at this time we teach the toddler

to walk/talk, and when they do we tell them to shut up and sit down. It only takes a second for baby to scale the stairs, and then it is panic stations while you negotiate and try to convince the child to stay put till you manage to reach out for them. What a relief when you have them safe in your arms smothering them with affection while you chastise them at the same time. What is the child thinking? Being loved and shouted at, at the same time.

We have the first day of school where many a mothers’ heart is broken leaving their child behind. Some children adapt easily to their new school and we have the ones that don’t. Thus making it harder


for mommy/daddy to leave as teacher tries coaxing the screaming child tugging at the apron strings. What is the child thinking?

Teenage tantrums have to be controlled and the best person for the job is the parent. We are there to lend a shoulder to cry on all because they can not have Justin Timberlake or Brittany Spears on their arm. Then as parents we struggle with Once upon a time there were the birds and the bees. Parents are the first to see danger signs. Whether it be the wrong choice in boy/girlfriend or maybe the people they hang out with. so when they receive a clip around the ear for doing something they felt was right and mum and dad didn’t, then what was that child thinking?

The wedding ring exchange between your child and their partner tells you the parent it is time to let go now they have all grown up. But do we ? I don’t think so.

Whatever the age of your kids you will find they will always be your babies.

What were those children thinking? Well let me tell you, mum and dad it because they cared.

Want to know what the married kids were thinking? Well I think you may have guessed that one your-self. So you see as protective and caring parents we could not let go if we wanted too because someone has to look after the grandchildren.

It is cruel world out there and in some sad cases children have lost their parents to illness or mis-fortunate events and have no one to point them in the right direction. If you want to help your kids then further their education. This way they have a chance to get on in life. An educational background works wonders in the career world. You can find more information about online education on the internet.

Don’t have your kids thinking they missed out on an opportunity because mum and dad chose not care anymore.

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August 2014 issue

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