Asterix Si Obelix (2012) DVDRip (Subtitrare English) by Www.radioFLy.ws.Srt

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    100:01:28,673 --> 00:01:32,677ASTERIX & OBELIXIN BRITAIN

    200:02:15,345 --> 00:02:18,223We've been through hard times.

    300:02:18,389 --> 00:02:22,101We've often believed,and then had to unbelieve.

    400:02:22,685 --> 00:02:23,478Can you say that?

    500:02:23,645 --> 00:02:25,021But today,

    600:02:25,188 --> 00:02:26,523

    we're on an even keel.

    700:02:26,689 --> 00:02:29,192Believe me,we're going to recover our losses!

    800:02:29,984 --> 00:02:32,529Ship to starboard!

    900:02:33,112 --> 00:02:34,364

    Ship to starboard!

    1000:02:38,618 --> 00:02:40,411Up and at 'em!

    1100:02:46,709 --> 00:02:48,461What did I tell you?

    1200:02:50,880 --> 00:02:53,049Over here, my dears.

    1300:03:00,056 --> 00:03:01,808What the...

    1400:03:14,153 --> 00:03:15,238At your stations!

    15

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    00:03:15,405 --> 00:03:17,824Raise the sails!Get your oars out!

    1600:03:20,451 --> 00:03:21,327Hurry!

    1700:03:21,494 --> 00:03:22,245Too late.

    1800:03:50,732 --> 00:03:52,150Up and at 'em!

    1900:03:53,026 --> 00:03:56,154Can anyone tell me what that was?

    2000:03:58,698 --> 00:04:02,535This my friends, this majestic sight,

    2100:04:02,827 --> 00:04:05,914is the most powerful armythat's ever existed.

    2200:04:06,080 --> 00:04:07,582It carries Rome's name

    2300:04:07,749 --> 00:04:10,543to the frontiers of the known world.

    2400:04:11,085 --> 00:04:11,920At its head

    2500:04:14,213 --> 00:04:15,173is one man.

    2600:04:16,382 --> 00:04:18,009A supreme leader.

    27

    00:04:18,176 --> 00:04:20,136A warrior who conquered Helvetia,

    2800:04:20,303 --> 00:04:23,222drove back the Germans,crushed the Gauls,

    2900:04:23,389 --> 00:04:25,725

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    and who will now conquer an island

    3000:04:26,100 --> 00:04:27,977called Britannia.

    3100:04:28,144 --> 00:04:29,479Britain!

    3200:04:31,814 --> 00:04:33,566This conquest, my friends,

    3300:04:33,733 --> 00:04:37,028is not merely one more laurelin Caesar's crown.

    3400:04:37,195 --> 00:04:38,780This conquest

    35

    00:04:38,947 --> 00:04:42,617is the gift of the Roman peopleto Britain's natives.

    3600:04:43,076 --> 00:04:46,955A barbarian peoplewho dwell in ignorance,

    3700:04:47,121 --> 00:04:50,750to whom we will bringthe benefits of Western civilisation.

    3800:04:51,793 --> 00:04:55,213By golly, this is a jolly rum thing,eh what?

    3900:04:55,380 --> 00:04:57,048I say, rather, old fruit.

    4000:04:57,632 --> 00:05:00,677Britain is inhabited

    by a mysterious people

    4100:05:01,094 --> 00:05:03,346who have one very curious custom:

    4200:05:03,513 --> 00:05:07,600at five in the afternoon,everything comes to a halt.

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    4300:05:09,811 --> 00:05:12,105Push! Push!

    4400:05:13,856 --> 00:05:15,024Hold on.

    4500:05:18,319 --> 00:05:20,363Why do they do this, O Caesar?

    4600:05:21,239 --> 00:05:22,824To drink hot Water.

    4700:05:22,991 --> 00:05:24,283Hot water?

    4800:05:25,618 --> 00:05:27,120Their favourite beverage.

    4900:05:34,669 --> 00:05:35,795A cup of hot water?

    5000:05:35,962 --> 00:05:39,007Gladly. With a cloud of milk, please.

    5100:05:39,173 --> 00:05:40,800We shall attack the Britons

    5200:05:40,967 --> 00:05:43,803every day at five o'clock on the dot.

    5300:05:44,345 --> 00:05:48,558I promise you,this will be our quickest victory ever!

    5400:05:56,774 --> 00:05:59,444I say, we should sound the alarm.

    5500:06:03,031 --> 00:06:05,199Wouldn't it be preferable to run?

    5600:06:05,366 --> 00:06:08,703Of course.But a gentleman never runs.

    57

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    00:06:13,833 --> 00:06:15,293No, not there.

    5800:06:26,888 --> 00:06:28,097Not there either.

    5900:06:38,691 --> 00:06:39,525Perfect.

    6000:06:53,247 --> 00:06:55,166Clear this away, please.

    6100:06:55,875 --> 00:06:57,543And send for Sir Jolitorax.

    6200:06:58,169 --> 00:06:59,587Yes, Your Majesty.

    63

    00:07:27,406 --> 00:07:29,367With his underhanded methods,

    6400:07:29,534 --> 00:07:33,037Mr. Caesar has almost annihilatedour army.

    6500:07:33,204 --> 00:07:34,622Behave, children.

    66

    00:07:34,789 --> 00:07:39,627But every remaining free man is here nowand we shall battle to the end.

    6700:07:45,007 --> 00:07:47,426All the same, Jolitorax,I wonder

    6800:07:47,593 --> 00:07:51,931if we can hold outagainst the Roman legions forever.

    6900:07:52,640 --> 00:07:55,518One village has managed this feat.

    7000:07:56,102 --> 00:07:56,811Really?

    71

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    00:07:56,978 --> 00:07:59,939Yes. They say its inhabitantshave held out

    7200:08:00,106 --> 00:08:03,484thanks to a magic potionthat makes them invincible.

    7300:08:03,651 --> 00:08:05,236If Her Majesty allows,

    7400:08:05,403 --> 00:08:08,281I shall go and ask themfor help in person.

    7500:08:08,656 --> 00:08:11,492That's a jolly good idea, Jolitorax.

    7600:08:11,659 --> 00:08:13,995

    Where is this remarkable village?

    7700:08:16,581 --> 00:08:17,832Well?

    7800:08:18,416 --> 00:08:21,043In Gaul, Your Majesty.

    7900:08:22,670 --> 00:08:24,881You want to seek help from the Gauls?

    8000:08:26,591 --> 00:08:28,384Mightn't it be preferable

    8100:08:28,551 --> 00:08:30,136to be invaded?

    8200:08:41,105 --> 00:08:42,690Ok for the Gauls.

    8300:08:56,621 --> 00:09:00,541Jolly good luck, Jolitorax.And all that sort of thing.

    8400:09:21,020 --> 00:09:22,647Goudurix...

    85

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    00:09:24,941 --> 00:09:26,525It's time to wake up.

    8600:09:28,319 --> 00:09:29,987- Should we start?- Start what?

    8700:09:30,154 --> 00:09:32,448- Bashing him around.- Obelix...

    8800:09:32,615 --> 00:09:35,952Our leader Abraracourcix entrusted uswith his nephew Goudurix.

    8900:09:36,118 --> 00:09:37,620To make a man out of him!

    9000:09:37,787 --> 00:09:40,248

    It won't happen if we don't bash him.

    9100:09:40,414 --> 00:09:44,460Obelix, those old-fashioned methodsaren't for us.

    9200:09:44,627 --> 00:09:46,295Patience, psychology,

    9300:09:46,462 --> 00:09:49,048

    and a gentle guiding hand.That's our method.

    9400:09:49,590 --> 00:09:53,678The lad will blossom intoa responsible man we can be proud of.

    9500:09:55,554 --> 00:09:57,723- So do we bash him or not?- No.

    9600:09:58,808 --> 00:10:01,519Goudurix,we wake up early in the country.

    9700:10:01,686 --> 00:10:04,105In Lutetia this is when I go to bed.

    98

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    00:10:04,272 --> 00:10:06,899So get lost, bumpkins,I won't move from this bed.

    9900:10:12,863 --> 00:10:14,156Obelix...

    10000:10:14,448 --> 00:10:15,866What? I used psychology.

    10100:10:16,033 --> 00:10:18,119I didn't bash him around.

    10200:10:18,619 --> 00:10:20,538He didn't want to move?The bed moved.

    10300:10:20,705 --> 00:10:22,832- You guys are crazy!

    - It isn't fun for us.

    10400:10:22,999 --> 00:10:25,668It's for your own good. Let's go.

    10500:10:25,835 --> 00:10:28,838I've got to get dressedand do my hair first.

    10600:10:36,929 --> 00:10:40,266

    Goudurix, you've been in therefor two hours!

    10700:10:41,642 --> 00:10:43,978Should I use some more psychology?

    10800:10:45,438 --> 00:10:46,605Come on.

    10900:10:52,778 --> 00:10:54,238

    Your hair's just the same.

    11000:10:54,405 --> 00:10:56,157No way. Before it wasn't done.

    11100:10:56,324 --> 00:10:58,242This is the "undone done" look.

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    11200:10:58,659 --> 00:11:00,953It takes a lot of work.

    11300:11:01,120 --> 00:11:03,539Ok, let's go to the forest.

    11400:11:03,706 --> 00:11:06,250Exercise No. 1:"How to whip Romans."

    11500:11:07,209 --> 00:11:08,002What?

    11600:11:08,169 --> 00:11:10,129Violence is for the weak.

    11700:11:10,296 --> 00:11:11,881What did you say?

    11800:11:17,136 --> 00:11:18,929Sorry, Asterix, I lost control.

    11900:11:19,096 --> 00:11:20,348It's only human.

    12000:11:20,514 --> 00:11:23,142And at leastit didn't mess up your hair!

    12100:11:25,811 --> 00:11:27,730- You guys are crazy!- No.

    12200:11:27,897 --> 00:11:29,106Come on, follow us.

    12300:11:31,067 --> 00:11:33,569With a little luck, We'll find a patrol.

    12400:11:33,736 --> 00:11:38,574There aren't many Romans left,they're all in Britain...

    12500:11:38,866 --> 00:11:40,117Where'd he go?

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    12600:11:43,204 --> 00:11:45,664I'm lucky to live in Lutetia.

    12700:11:45,831 --> 00:11:49,335But I needed a change of sceneryso I came to the country.

    12800:11:49,502 --> 00:11:51,837I think it'll help my songwriting.

    12900:11:52,505 --> 00:11:55,424I'm a bard.Hey, you just gave me an idea!

    13000:11:55,800 --> 00:11:56,926Really?

    13100:11:57,760 --> 00:12:02,056

    I'll build ye a dolmenWhere love will reign

    13200:12:02,681 --> 00:12:05,476Where love is everythingAnd you'll be my queen...

    13300:12:05,643 --> 00:12:06,394How pretty!

    134

    00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:08,479That's because you inspired it.

    13500:12:08,646 --> 00:12:11,440Excuse me,you're not here to court pretty girls

    13600:12:11,607 --> 00:12:13,025but to become a man.

    137

    00:12:13,859 --> 00:12:15,111Hey, morons,

    13800:12:15,277 --> 00:12:18,280a man isn't necessarilya thick-headed brute.

    13900:12:18,447 --> 00:12:22,201

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    A man can be someone sensitivewho can say "I love you",

    14000:12:22,368 --> 00:12:23,953who's not afraid to cry.

    14100:12:24,120 --> 00:12:25,287Oh, how true!

    14200:12:25,454 --> 00:12:27,498So if you'd kindly blow off, peasants.

    14300:12:29,083 --> 00:12:30,126No, let me.

    14400:12:37,216 --> 00:12:40,177I say. I believe I've foundthe right place.

    14500:12:45,641 --> 00:12:48,018You've travelled far, British friend.

    14600:12:48,185 --> 00:12:51,730What can I offer you?Wild boar? A beer?

    14700:12:51,897 --> 00:12:53,482A cup of hot water, please.

    14800:12:53,649 --> 00:12:54,859Is that all?

    14900:12:55,025 --> 00:12:57,069With a cloud of milk. Thank you.

    15000:13:02,658 --> 00:13:03,701Asterix, Obelix,

    151

    00:13:03,868 --> 00:13:07,037meet Jolitorax.He's just arrived from Britain

    15200:13:07,204 --> 00:13:10,541to seek our helpagainst the Roman invader.

    153

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    00:13:10,708 --> 00:13:13,252Hullo.Please, shake me by the hand.

    15400:13:15,796 --> 00:13:17,923- Obelix!- Obelix, behave!

    15500:13:18,090 --> 00:13:21,135- He said to shake him.- He's a Brit. They talk different.

    15600:13:21,844 --> 00:13:22,636Are you ok?

    15700:13:22,803 --> 00:13:23,804Jolly good show.

    15800:13:23,971 --> 00:13:26,932

    What strength!I suppose it's the magic potion?

    15900:13:27,099 --> 00:13:28,726Obelix fell in it as a baby.

    16000:13:28,893 --> 00:13:30,186Not again...

    16100:13:30,603 --> 00:13:31,270

    I

    16200:13:31,437 --> 00:13:34,940with that strength,we'd easily beat the Romans, eh what!

    16300:13:35,107 --> 00:13:38,152- Why do you keep saying "what"?- Say what's what?

    164

    00:13:38,319 --> 00:13:39,612I asked Panoramix

    16500:13:39,778 --> 00:13:42,239to prepare some magic potion.

    16600:13:42,573 --> 00:13:44,158That's a lot of potion.

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    16700:13:44,325 --> 00:13:47,411That is why you and Obelixwill escort him.

    16800:13:47,578 --> 00:13:49,622It mustn't fall into enemy hands.

    16900:13:49,788 --> 00:13:51,624We're going to Britain!

    17000:13:51,790 --> 00:13:54,293There'll be brand new Romans.And to be honest,

    17100:13:54,460 --> 00:13:55,920I won't miss your nephew.

    172

    00:13:56,295 --> 00:13:58,422Goudurix is coming with us.

    17300:13:58,589 --> 00:14:00,966With Idefix, there won't be room!

    17400:14:01,133 --> 00:14:03,385It's the opportunityto perfect his education.

    175

    00:14:03,552 --> 00:14:05,012No...

    17600:14:05,179 --> 00:14:05,804Chief?

    17700:14:10,726 --> 00:14:11,852He said no.

    17800:14:13,020 --> 00:14:14,647

    He says you're too little.

    17900:14:15,189 --> 00:14:17,441It's too far and there's no room.

    18000:14:20,569 --> 00:14:22,780He'd rather we take that imbecile...

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    18100:14:27,952 --> 00:14:30,955We'll be back soon.

    18200:14:31,121 --> 00:14:34,333We give them the barrel: hello, goodbye.And that's it.

    18300:14:34,917 --> 00:14:37,211You won't miss much.

    18400:14:39,088 --> 00:14:41,257Yes, there'll be lots of Romans.

    18500:14:41,757 --> 00:14:42,841But you know,

    18600:14:43,008 --> 00:14:46,178Romans are like oysters,

    too many make you sick.

    18700:14:54,311 --> 00:14:55,521Be good.

    18800:14:57,648 --> 00:14:59,275Watch over the house.

    18900:15:00,568 --> 00:15:02,027I'm counting on you.

    19000:15:18,419 --> 00:15:20,170I didn't join the legion for this.

    19100:15:20,337 --> 00:15:24,550I joined to serve Rome,not arrest illegal alienus all clay long.

    19200:15:24,717 --> 00:15:29,221Caesar said: for the empire's stability,

    migratory flows must be controlled.

    19300:15:29,388 --> 00:15:31,682And what does that mean?

    19400:15:31,849 --> 00:15:33,642It means, uh...

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    19500:15:33,809 --> 00:15:36,395Look, orders are orders. Don't argue.

    19600:15:38,731 --> 00:15:39,815Caught red-handed!

    19700:15:40,190 --> 00:15:42,943What?Gauls can go to the beach.

    19800:15:43,527 --> 00:15:46,238I smell illegal alienus.Let's check their ID.

    19900:15:46,405 --> 00:15:47,990- Count me out.- What?

    200

    00:15:48,157 --> 00:15:49,033It's a bum rap.

    20100:15:49,575 --> 00:15:53,078To each his own sense of duty.It's your conscience.

    20200:16:00,794 --> 00:16:03,881Roman legion, border control!Show me your papyrus.

    20300:16:04,048 --> 00:16:05,716Here.

    20400:16:09,303 --> 00:16:11,263- That's the old model.- Oh yeah?

    20500:16:11,722 --> 00:16:13,307The new ones are stone.

    20600:16:13,474 --> 00:16:15,851Impossible to forge.There're too many fakes.

    20700:16:16,560 --> 00:16:17,686What's in the barrel?

    208

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    00:16:17,853 --> 00:16:20,606The problem with Romansis that they're overeager.

    20900:16:21,523 --> 00:16:22,650Talking about me?

    21000:16:22,816 --> 00:16:25,402Jolitorax,it's time you tested the potion.

    21100:16:25,694 --> 00:16:26,695What's that?

    21200:16:26,862 --> 00:16:28,572One second, please.

    21300:16:43,462 --> 00:16:47,257I may lack a sense of duty,

    but when it comes to survival...

    21400:17:12,616 --> 00:17:14,785- Well?- They're holding out.

    21500:17:14,952 --> 00:17:16,704BY Jupiter!

    21600:17:17,037 --> 00:17:19,748

    My sapiens has its limits!

    21700:17:20,374 --> 00:17:22,626You mean your patience?

    21800:17:22,876 --> 00:17:26,130No, my sapiens. Wisdom.Don't you speak Latin?

    21900:17:27,339 --> 00:17:30,718

    I'm asking the Senatefor reinforcements.

    22000:17:30,884 --> 00:17:31,510Ave, Caesar!

    22100:17:31,677 --> 00:17:34,138A delegation of senators

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    is requesting an audience.

    22200:17:34,596 --> 00:17:38,976Extraordinary! I think of the Senateand the Senate comes to me.

    22300:17:39,852 --> 00:17:42,521I'm popular with the gods!Show them in

    22400:17:42,688 --> 00:17:45,399and prepare a little orgy.They'll like that.

    22500:17:48,152 --> 00:17:48,819Ave,

    22600:17:48,986 --> 00:17:51,238honourable members of the Senate.

    22700:17:51,405 --> 00:17:52,656It is a privilege...

    22800:17:52,823 --> 00:17:53,907Ave, Caesar.

    22900:17:54,783 --> 00:17:56,493Senator Lucius Fouinus.

    23000:17:57,119 --> 00:18:01,665The Senate commissioned usto audit your accounts.

    23100:18:02,040 --> 00:18:03,083To do what?

    23200:18:03,250 --> 00:18:05,919Audit your accounts. It's Latin.It means...

    23300:18:06,086 --> 00:18:08,172I know what it means!

    23400:18:08,338 --> 00:18:11,842I've looked at your books.They're not very clear.

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    23500:18:12,760 --> 00:18:13,886Oh really?

    23600:18:14,052 --> 00:18:15,679For example...

    23700:18:16,889 --> 00:18:19,308This expense of 20,000 sesterces

    23800:18:19,475 --> 00:18:20,768for a round-trip journey

    23900:18:20,934 --> 00:18:24,313- Alexandria-Londinium -by private galley.

    24000:18:24,938 --> 00:18:27,149Cleopatra came for the weekend.

    24100:18:27,316 --> 00:18:29,902Can't Cleopatra take a regular boat?

    24200:18:30,778 --> 00:18:32,571She is the Queen of Egypt.

    24300:18:32,738 --> 00:18:35,532Then why doesn't Egypt pay?

    24400:18:38,118 --> 00:18:40,579My men and I will examine this.

    24500:18:40,746 --> 00:18:43,332I hope no one will try to influence us.

    24600:18:43,499 --> 00:18:45,042I wouldn't dream of it.

    247

    00:18:45,209 --> 00:18:47,002The Senators' orgy is ready.

    24800:18:47,169 --> 00:18:48,545Should I call the girls?

    24900:18:59,848 --> 00:19:01,600What about our reinforcements?

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    25000:19:04,436 --> 00:19:08,106Forgive me, O Great Caesar,but I might have an idea.

    25100:19:08,273 --> 00:19:09,024I'm listening.

    25200:19:11,985 --> 00:19:15,197Why not use our secret fundsto hire mercenaries

    25300:19:15,364 --> 00:19:16,782to do our dirty work?

    25400:19:18,784 --> 00:19:21,870Supposing such "secret funds" existed...

    255

    00:19:23,330 --> 00:19:24,623Who do you have in mind?

    25600:19:25,207 --> 00:19:27,626The worst barbarians of all, Caesar.

    25700:19:28,335 --> 00:19:29,795The Normans.

    25800:19:30,128 --> 00:19:32,548

    A fearsome people from the North

    25900:19:32,714 --> 00:19:36,093where the snow never meltsand it's dark for six months.

    26000:19:36,593 --> 00:19:40,430These merciless warriorswho drink from their enemies' skulls

    261

    00:19:40,597 --> 00:19:41,765have one particularity...

    26200:19:42,933 --> 00:19:44,685they do not know fear!

    26300:20:08,333 --> 00:20:09,418What's your name?

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    26400:20:09,585 --> 00:20:14,047Megacursus, O Noble Caesar,to honour and serve you.

    26500:20:14,464 --> 00:20:19,469Well, Megacursus,go find the Normans and hire them.

    26600:20:20,095 --> 00:20:22,306If you succeed in this mission,

    26700:20:23,223 --> 00:20:24,725you'll be a rich man.

    26800:20:24,892 --> 00:20:27,144And now let's enjoy that orgy.

    269

    00:20:27,311 --> 00:20:28,979- I despise waste.- Me too?

    27000:20:29,146 --> 00:20:32,107No. You'll get an orgy-basketfor your trip.

    27100:20:44,369 --> 00:20:46,330Why did you

    27200:20:46,496 --> 00:20:47,789desert me

    27300:20:48,749 --> 00:20:52,836Why did you abandon me

    27400:20:53,503 --> 00:20:55,380Why did you ditch me...

    275

    00:20:55,839 --> 00:20:57,424I understand why.

    27600:20:59,718 --> 00:21:03,013Why is it all over

    27700:21:03,263 --> 00:21:06,016Why did you leave me...

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    27800:21:06,183 --> 00:21:08,352You're giving me a headache.

    27900:21:08,518 --> 00:21:11,355- I'm expressing myself.- I'll express a bashing!

    28000:21:11,521 --> 00:21:13,690Obelix, patience and psychology.

    28100:21:13,857 --> 00:21:16,026Goudurix, what do you want to be?

    28200:21:16,193 --> 00:21:17,444I want to be a bard.

    28300:21:17,611 --> 00:21:20,030

    But the old man wants meto be a druid.

    28400:21:20,197 --> 00:21:22,449Druid is a fascinating profession.

    28500:21:22,616 --> 00:21:25,202Yeah right, 60 years of schooling.No thanks.

    286

    00:21:28,288 --> 00:21:29,957What's a British hunk?

    28700:21:31,375 --> 00:21:32,501A tourist!

    28800:21:36,922 --> 00:21:38,548Don't take it personally.

    28900:21:38,715 --> 00:21:42,678

    It's because in Gaulwe say that the Brits are kind of...

    29000:21:44,554 --> 00:21:46,181I mean, you're not very...

    29100:21:48,934 --> 00:21:53,105What about you?

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    How do the Britons see us?

    29200:21:54,439 --> 00:21:57,275I say. We find you arrogant,

    29300:21:58,110 --> 00:22:01,321loudmouthed, lecherous,

    29400:22:01,822 --> 00:22:04,866cowardly, uncultivated...

    29500:22:05,325 --> 00:22:06,868and dirty.

    29600:22:11,623 --> 00:22:14,501Why did you forsake me...

    29700:22:14,668 --> 00:22:18,296

    Stop bleating like a lamb,you'll never become a man.

    29800:22:18,463 --> 00:22:20,298What's a man in your book?

    29900:22:20,465 --> 00:22:24,219Two guys like youwho live together with a little dog?

    300

    00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:26,555I'll kill him.

    30100:22:26,722 --> 00:22:30,559We promised the chiefwe'd bring him back safe and sound.

    30200:22:31,351 --> 00:22:32,436Calm down.

    303

    00:22:33,812 --> 00:22:37,232In Britain, two men living togetheris quite common.

    30400:22:38,650 --> 00:22:40,610That's not the same thing.

    30500:22:40,777 --> 00:22:43,780

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    I think there'sa little misunderstanding.

    30600:22:43,947 --> 00:22:46,658We don't live together,we share lodgings.

    30700:22:46,825 --> 00:22:49,786It's more like we're roommates.

    30800:22:49,953 --> 00:22:53,415It's like co-workerswho have the same hours.

    30900:22:53,582 --> 00:22:55,834It's a question of practicality.

    31000:23:00,589 --> 00:23:03,383I never Would've left you

    31100:23:03,550 --> 00:23:05,802I never would've gone...

    31200:23:14,811 --> 00:23:16,605Bless you, Obelix.

    31300:23:17,439 --> 00:23:18,940It wasn't me.

    31400:23:24,613 --> 00:23:25,697Sorry.

    31500:23:25,864 --> 00:23:30,786I'm sorry to impose my presence on youin your jolly-boat, noble travellers.

    31600:23:30,952 --> 00:23:32,412But I must reach Britain

    31700:23:32,579 --> 00:23:36,249and regular boat linesdon't like illegal alienus like me.

    31800:23:36,625 --> 00:23:39,377I say, he is original, eh what?

    319

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    00:23:39,544 --> 00:23:40,754Don't worry,

    32000:23:40,921 --> 00:23:44,341when we land,I'll depart and bother you no more.

    32100:23:44,508 --> 00:23:45,801You're no bother.

    32200:23:45,967 --> 00:23:48,220But why Britain, mister...?

    32300:23:48,386 --> 00:23:50,680Pindepis. My name is Pindepis.

    32400:23:50,847 --> 00:23:54,476I come from a poor,distant land in the Ganges Valley.

    32500:23:54,643 --> 00:23:58,688They say you can get rich in Britain,so I decided to try my luck.

    32600:23:58,855 --> 00:23:59,940What's that?

    32700:24:01,775 --> 00:24:04,694A plant from back home.

    It grows all over.

    32800:24:04,861 --> 00:24:07,155I feel less lonely with it.

    32900:24:08,073 --> 00:24:10,450So please don't throw me overboard.

    33000:24:10,617 --> 00:24:11,451I can't swim!

    33100:24:22,838 --> 00:24:24,214I'm hungry.

    33200:24:26,633 --> 00:24:28,343Me too.

    333

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    00:24:31,263 --> 00:24:33,682I say, I believe we have a message.

    33400:24:35,642 --> 00:24:38,019Your Majesty, a message from Jolitorax.

    33500:24:38,812 --> 00:24:39,729What does he say?

    33600:24:41,022 --> 00:24:43,984"Your Majesty, I have the pleasureof informing you

    33700:24:44,151 --> 00:24:46,736"that the barrelhas reached British soil.

    33800:24:46,903 --> 00:24:48,530"Faithfully yours, Jolitorax."

    33900:24:48,822 --> 00:24:51,700Excellent news. Isn't it, dears?

    34000:25:32,908 --> 00:25:34,910Hey dudes, hiking isn't my thing.

    34100:25:35,368 --> 00:25:38,121- If you want to become a man...- Drop it.

    34200:25:39,581 --> 00:25:43,835I say. A calm and peaceful spotto have a bite to eat.

    34300:25:45,170 --> 00:25:47,464I hope they have wild boar.

    34400:25:48,965 --> 00:25:50,759JOLLY BOAR INN

    34500:25:57,224 --> 00:25:58,433Hullo.

    34600:25:59,100 --> 00:25:59,893Hullo.

    347

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    00:26:00,060 --> 00:26:01,561Would you like supper?

    34800:26:01,937 --> 00:26:05,690Yes, rather.We'd like four orders of boar.

    34900:26:05,857 --> 00:26:08,568Of course. Go sit over there.

    35000:26:13,823 --> 00:26:14,991Hullo.

    35100:26:44,604 --> 00:26:46,189Is that their boar?

    35200:26:46,356 --> 00:26:47,857Doesn't look jolly to me.

    35300:26:48,024 --> 00:26:49,442It's a British delicacy:

    35400:26:49,609 --> 00:26:52,529boiled boar with mint sauce.

    35500:26:52,696 --> 00:26:54,197Delicious.

    356

    00:26:54,364 --> 00:26:56,283Why does it smell like fish?

    35700:26:56,658 --> 00:26:59,119Because we always boil itwith cod liver.

    35800:26:59,286 --> 00:27:01,413Otherwise it would have no taste.

    359

    00:27:02,205 --> 00:27:03,456Poor beast.

    36000:27:11,089 --> 00:27:12,215Ave.

    36100:27:12,716 --> 00:27:14,634We're looking for Gauls

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    36200:27:14,801 --> 00:27:16,803who disembarked illegally.

    36300:27:28,481 --> 00:27:32,235Ave. Last name, first name,profession and place of residence.

    36400:27:32,694 --> 00:27:34,279But of course.

    36500:27:34,446 --> 00:27:37,574We're British merchantson a business trip.

    36600:27:37,741 --> 00:27:41,036My name is Jolitorax,and this is Asterax.

    36700:27:41,202 --> 00:27:41,828Hullo.

    36800:27:42,704 --> 00:27:44,080Obelax...

    36900:27:44,247 --> 00:27:46,499- Hello.- No. "Hullo".

    37000:27:46,666 --> 00:27:48,835- Hello.- One second. "Hullo".

    37100:27:51,129 --> 00:27:52,505No, "hullo".

    37200:27:52,672 --> 00:27:54,341It's a short "u".

    37300:27:54,507 --> 00:27:55,884Hullo.

    37400:27:56,551 --> 00:27:57,719That's it.

    37500:27:58,678 --> 00:28:00,847

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    And my nephew... Pain-in-the-ax.

    37600:28:01,014 --> 00:28:02,974The poor boy is mute.

    37700:28:07,187 --> 00:28:09,981Soldiers! Search the inn!

    37800:28:10,690 --> 00:28:12,275Enjoy your meal, Britons.

    37900:28:29,417 --> 00:28:33,004I don't knowhow you can eat that stuff...

    38000:28:33,171 --> 00:28:34,381You Britons.

    381

    00:28:37,884 --> 00:28:39,511Nothing to report, sir.

    38200:28:41,054 --> 00:28:42,764Good evening, gentlemen.

    38300:28:43,056 --> 00:28:44,432Have a good journey.

    38400:28:53,066 --> 00:28:54,359

    By Toutatis!

    38500:28:54,943 --> 00:28:55,985In the name of Rome,

    38600:28:56,152 --> 00:28:58,530surrender, Gauls!

    38700:29:25,473 --> 00:29:27,642Bravo! Good job blending in.

    38800:29:27,809 --> 00:29:29,394It's not my fault.

    38900:29:29,561 --> 00:29:32,522Wild boar with cod liver is inhuman.

    390

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    00:29:32,689 --> 00:29:35,066You're right, it's not your fault.

    39100:29:35,233 --> 00:29:37,735It never has beenand probably never will.

    39200:29:38,027 --> 00:29:39,946Are you trying to be nice?

    39300:29:40,113 --> 00:29:41,197You know what?

    39400:29:41,364 --> 00:29:44,033Even when you're around, I feel lonely.

    39500:29:44,200 --> 00:29:46,911I'm intellectually undernourished.

    39600:29:47,078 --> 00:29:48,371Come on, we get on.

    39700:29:48,538 --> 00:29:49,956No. I put up with you.

    39800:29:50,123 --> 00:29:54,085I knock myself outfor a walking calamity, a curse,

    39900:29:54,252 --> 00:29:56,004a natural disaster named Obelix.

    40000:29:56,171 --> 00:29:57,755And what do I get?

    40100:29:58,631 --> 00:29:59,424Nothing.

    402

    00:29:59,591 --> 00:30:03,428I sacrifice myself for nothing.So you see, I'm fed up.

    40300:30:04,012 --> 00:30:04,804Frankly,

    40400:30:04,971 --> 00:30:08,475

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    "two guys who live togetherwith a little dog" isn't for me.

    40500:30:08,725 --> 00:30:10,894What've you got against Idefix?

    40600:30:11,728 --> 00:30:13,730I need to meet someone.

    40700:30:14,063 --> 00:30:14,689Who?

    40800:30:14,856 --> 00:30:18,526Who knows! But it'll never happenwith you clinging to me.

    40900:30:20,111 --> 00:30:21,488What's his problem?

    41000:30:21,946 --> 00:30:24,574He has to meet someonebut he doesn't know who.

    41100:30:24,741 --> 00:30:26,659So of course he's irritable.

    41200:30:35,627 --> 00:30:37,837Caesar was very clear,

    41300:30:38,004 --> 00:30:40,715if you wipe outthe village of British rebels,

    41400:30:40,882 --> 00:30:42,592he'll shower you with gold.

    41500:30:43,259 --> 00:30:45,303Gold only brings luxury

    41600:30:45,470 --> 00:30:47,889and luxury weakens men's spirits.

    41700:30:49,182 --> 00:30:51,768Is that what you want, Roman?To weaken us?

    418

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    00:30:52,477 --> 00:30:54,896Not on my life, Grossebaf.

    41900:30:57,982 --> 00:31:02,153Only fear could tempt usto travel to this country.

    42000:31:02,320 --> 00:31:03,571Fear?

    42100:31:03,738 --> 00:31:06,533Even the weakest nations know fear.But not us!

    42200:31:06,699 --> 00:31:08,034Not us!

    42300:31:10,245 --> 00:31:12,038Yet we've tried everything.

    42400:31:13,373 --> 00:31:15,416We've carried out experiments...

    42500:31:16,167 --> 00:31:16,793Well?

    42600:31:17,710 --> 00:31:19,712Still more pain than fear.

    42700:31:22,298 --> 00:31:26,094We've tried to instil itin our infants...

    42800:31:30,723 --> 00:31:32,225Without' success.

    42900:31:32,392 --> 00:31:33,851Fear escapes us.

    43000:31:34,018 --> 00:31:35,353By Odin, we want to know it!

    43100:31:35,520 --> 00:31:36,980We want to know it!

    43200:31:38,273 --> 00:31:39,274

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    But why?

    43300:31:39,983 --> 00:31:41,651He asks why...

    43400:31:44,821 --> 00:31:47,991Everyone knowsthat fear gives you wings, Roman!

    43500:31:48,157 --> 00:31:51,744And my warriors and I dream of flying.Like birds.

    43600:31:54,956 --> 00:31:56,416Then you're in luck.

    43700:31:56,583 --> 00:31:59,335Britons are the most fearful peoplein the world.

    43800:31:59,919 --> 00:32:00,628They are?

    43900:32:01,004 --> 00:32:02,422Yes, of course.

    44000:32:02,589 --> 00:32:05,675Every time you ask them a question,they answer:

    44100:32:05,842 --> 00:32:08,678"I'm afraid that..." or "I fear that..."

    44200:32:10,305 --> 00:32:11,389Then it's decided!

    44300:32:11,556 --> 00:32:13,933By Odin, We're sailing for Britain!

    44400:32:23,026 --> 00:32:24,277Gentlemen...

    44500:32:24,902 --> 00:32:27,322Welcome to Londinium.

    44600:33:54,575 --> 00:33:57,328

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    The Romans are looking for us.Let's hide the barrel.

    44700:33:57,495 --> 00:33:58,621Good idea. But where?

    44800:33:58,996 --> 00:34:03,167Use your heads. Where is the best placeto hide a tree? A forest.

    44900:34:03,334 --> 00:34:05,503So the best place to hide a barrel?

    45000:34:05,670 --> 00:34:07,046A forest?

    45100:34:08,548 --> 00:34:09,674A...?

    45200:34:09,841 --> 00:34:11,008A forest...

    45300:34:11,509 --> 00:34:14,095An inn!With other barrels.

    45400:34:14,262 --> 00:34:14,887Excellent

    45500:34:15,054 --> 00:34:17,140I know just the place.

    45600:34:22,854 --> 00:34:25,440Cousin Jolitorax,fearfully pleased to see you.

    45700:34:25,606 --> 00:34:27,400I say, me too, Relax.

    45800:34:27,567 --> 00:34:31,112But let's not get emotional.I'm on a mission for the Queen.

    45900:34:31,487 --> 00:34:34,365I'll bid farewell to my wifeand I'm yours.

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    46000:34:34,532 --> 00:34:38,077Not necessary. We only wantto hide this barrel with yours.

    46100:34:38,369 --> 00:34:41,706I see. Easy as pie.We'll put it in the cellar.

    46200:34:41,873 --> 00:34:42,874Follow me.

    46300:34:53,926 --> 00:34:55,511One stout, please.

    46400:34:57,263 --> 00:34:59,515The energy in this town is amazing.

    46500:35:00,099 --> 00:35:00,725

    Excuse me?

    46600:35:00,892 --> 00:35:05,229The energy here is amazing.You feel like anything's possible.

    46700:35:05,396 --> 00:35:06,105Yeah, maybe.

    46800:35:06,272 --> 00:35:09,317

    No, it's true. I'm from Lutetia.It's dead in comparison.

    46900:35:09,484 --> 00:35:11,486It's stuck in a time warp.

    47000:35:11,652 --> 00:35:13,571- You're from Lutetia?- Yeah.

    471

    00:35:14,071 --> 00:35:16,866Well, not far.Barely a two-week walk.

    47200:35:20,912 --> 00:35:22,789People sure do like stout here.

    47300:35:22,955 --> 00:35:24,832

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    - Next one's on me.- No, thank you...

    47400:35:24,999 --> 00:35:27,919I insist.I know what you're thinking.

    47500:35:28,294 --> 00:35:31,339"He's a Gaul, watch out,they're all Womanizers."

    47600:35:31,506 --> 00:35:33,716Well not me. I'm no womanizer.

    47700:35:34,926 --> 00:35:36,886I'm just a guy who loves life.

    47800:35:37,053 --> 00:35:39,847Life's magical,

    timeless moments, you see?

    47900:35:40,014 --> 00:35:41,891Here, getting to know each other.

    48000:35:42,058 --> 00:35:46,813I'm full of energy like this town.I want to live, to laugh, to cry.

    48100:35:46,979 --> 00:35:49,816

    Yes, I'm a man who knows how to cry.

    48200:35:49,982 --> 00:35:51,776I'm not ashamed to say I cry.

    48300:35:52,193 --> 00:35:53,778I cry very often. Over nothing.

    48400:35:55,196 --> 00:35:56,447Do you like men who cry?

    48500:35:57,865 --> 00:35:59,659Not really.

    48600:36:09,544 --> 00:36:12,547How's everything?ls the barrel safe?

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    48700:36:12,922 --> 00:36:14,924- What?- You've got some froth...

    48800:36:16,801 --> 00:36:18,594So, what do we do now?

    48900:36:19,428 --> 00:36:20,721Well,

    49000:36:21,347 --> 00:36:25,768I suppose we could paya surprise visit to Ophelia.

    49100:36:26,102 --> 00:36:26,894Who's Ophelia?

    49200:36:27,520 --> 00:36:28,187

    My fiance.

    49300:36:33,192 --> 00:36:34,694There's still some...

    49400:36:45,371 --> 00:36:48,583I'd heard British chicks were dogs,but she's hot.

    49500:36:53,546 --> 00:36:56,966

    Yes, she is pretty.That black dress really suits her.

    49600:37:04,473 --> 00:37:05,391Jolitorax...

    49700:37:06,183 --> 00:37:07,768What a jolly surprise.

    49800:37:07,935 --> 00:37:09,103

    I'm frightfully happy too.

    49900:37:09,270 --> 00:37:12,189But no effusiveness.I'm on a mission for the Queen.

    50000:37:12,356 --> 00:37:15,526Since I was in Londinium

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    I wanted you to meet...

    50100:37:15,693 --> 00:37:16,694Goudurix. Cool.

    50200:37:18,571 --> 00:37:20,573Okay you, calm down!

    50300:37:21,365 --> 00:37:23,868She's his fiance. Show some respect.

    50400:37:24,035 --> 00:37:26,746- Forgive him, he's young.- It's of no importance.

    50500:37:26,913 --> 00:37:28,372Asterix. At your service.

    506

    00:37:29,665 --> 00:37:31,375Pleased to meet you.

    50700:37:31,542 --> 00:37:32,793Very pleased.

    50800:37:34,337 --> 00:37:36,047- My friends are...- Gauls.

    509

    00:37:36,213 --> 00:37:38,007We guessed as much.

    51000:37:38,424 --> 00:37:39,300By the accent?

    51100:37:39,717 --> 00:37:41,218No, by the smell.

    51200:37:42,678 --> 00:37:45,848

    Mother and Father are away,but I insist you stay.

    51300:37:46,557 --> 00:37:50,186Miss Macintosh and Ishall prepare a meal for you.

    51400:37:58,986 --> 00:38:01,656

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    The energy in this town is amazing.

    51500:38:01,822 --> 00:38:02,448Oh, really?

    51600:38:02,615 --> 00:38:05,618You really feel likeanything's possible here...

    51700:38:05,785 --> 00:38:08,037You could meet fabulous people,

    51800:38:08,204 --> 00:38:09,538exchange ideas,

    51900:38:09,705 --> 00:38:13,167fall in love,have intense but brief adventures...

    52000:38:14,251 --> 00:38:15,795You know, all that.

    52100:38:17,213 --> 00:38:19,799I hear you and your friendhave a little dog.

    52200:38:21,592 --> 00:38:22,718You didn't bring it?

    52300:38:23,594 --> 00:38:24,679No.

    52400:38:29,141 --> 00:38:30,726What's this?

    52500:38:31,227 --> 00:38:34,689Illegal Gaulswith a secret weapon in a barrel?

    52600:38:34,855 --> 00:38:37,817Yes. We're arresting all Gaul residents.

    52700:38:37,984 --> 00:38:39,193Women and children too.

    52800:38:39,360 --> 00:38:40,569

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    We'll burn their houses down.

    52900:38:40,736 --> 00:38:43,155- No. We need to find the barrel.- But how?

    53000:38:43,322 --> 00:38:44,699Use your heads...

    53100:38:44,865 --> 00:38:47,994Where is the best place to hide a tree?

    53200:38:49,495 --> 00:38:50,204A forest!

    53300:38:50,371 --> 00:38:54,875So the best placeto hide a barrel would be...

    53400:38:56,752 --> 00:38:58,629An inn!

    53500:38:59,046 --> 00:39:01,924Search every cellarof every inn in Londinium

    53600:39:02,091 --> 00:39:04,135and confiscate every barrel!

    53700:39:07,430 --> 00:39:08,931What about the tree?

    53800:39:09,390 --> 00:39:10,975Find that barrel!

    53900:39:11,726 --> 00:39:16,022I'll have you boiledand served to the lions with mint sauce!

    54000:39:28,534 --> 00:39:30,202I don't think she likes me.

    54100:39:30,369 --> 00:39:31,370Who's that?

    54200:39:31,996 --> 00:39:34,373

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    Miss Makichtok. She doesn't like me.

    54300:39:34,540 --> 00:39:37,001With her looks she shouldn't be picky.

    54400:39:42,548 --> 00:39:46,385It doesn't show muchthat you and Ophelia are engaged.

    54500:39:46,552 --> 00:39:48,429I'd say it doesn't show at all.

    54600:39:48,971 --> 00:39:52,600That's because we Britonsare sticklers for proprieties.

    54700:39:53,768 --> 00:39:55,102A gentleman

    54800:39:55,269 --> 00:39:58,481must never, under any circumstance,compromise his fiance

    54900:39:58,647 --> 00:40:01,567by being too... how should I put it?

    55000:40:01,817 --> 00:40:03,235Overbearing.

    55100:40:04,487 --> 00:40:09,909Unescorted visits must be rareand last only a fleeting moment.

    55200:40:12,119 --> 00:40:14,371And when was your last one?

    55300:40:14,538 --> 00:40:15,372Last year.

    55400:40:16,665 --> 00:40:18,000I see.

    55500:40:18,334 --> 00:40:22,379I say, when Opheliainvited us to stay, I hesitated.

    556

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    00:40:22,713 --> 00:40:25,758But I'm gladI had the audacity to accept.

    55700:40:26,759 --> 00:40:29,386Would you have the audacityto pass the salt?

    55800:40:31,597 --> 00:40:32,723Sorry.

    55900:40:38,979 --> 00:40:41,148You really likeMiss What's-Her-Face?

    56000:40:41,857 --> 00:40:44,401Then give her a present.It always works.

    561

    00:40:45,194 --> 00:40:46,695That's a good idea.

    56200:40:48,030 --> 00:40:49,031I know...

    56300:41:21,188 --> 00:41:23,274In the name of Rome, open up!

    56400:41:27,153 --> 00:41:28,487

    Search the inn!

    56500:41:56,390 --> 00:41:57,725Legionaries!

    56600:41:58,100 --> 00:42:01,061There's a secret weaponin one of these barrels.

    56700:42:01,520 --> 00:42:05,065

    To find it, we will applymethodology and rigour.

    56800:42:05,399 --> 00:42:07,151You make a hole, you taste.

    56900:42:07,526 --> 00:42:10,070If anything tastes suspicious,

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    let us know.

    57000:42:10,237 --> 00:42:11,864Otherwise, mark the barrel

    57100:42:12,031 --> 00:42:15,242and move on to the next.Is that clear?

    57200:42:15,492 --> 00:42:16,493On my command!

    57300:42:29,715 --> 00:42:30,841Action!

    57400:42:45,231 --> 00:42:48,234The rhododendronshave come on nicely this year.

    57500:42:48,776 --> 00:42:49,610Oh, really?

    57600:42:56,283 --> 00:42:58,118The begonias too.

    57700:43:00,371 --> 00:43:02,331But not the sunflowers.

    578

    00:43:04,041 --> 00:43:06,210I'm terribly sorry to hear it.

    57900:43:36,573 --> 00:43:38,909That must've taken ages to make.

    58000:43:39,076 --> 00:43:41,161The Macintoshes have been working

    58100:43:41,787 --> 00:43:44,373

    on this tapestry for five generations.

    58200:43:45,040 --> 00:43:46,292I see.

    58300:43:46,458 --> 00:43:48,502When it's finished,

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    58400:43:48,794 --> 00:43:51,463it will be my family's pride and joy.

    58500:44:00,597 --> 00:44:04,143The energy in this townreally is amazing...

    58600:44:07,396 --> 00:44:08,230Sorry.

    58700:44:11,358 --> 00:44:12,943Sorry to burst in on you.

    58800:44:13,110 --> 00:44:16,280The Romans seizedthe barrel of magic potion!

    58900:44:16,780 --> 00:44:18,073

    If you want to find it,

    59000:44:18,240 --> 00:44:20,534it has "Relax" written on it.

    59100:44:58,322 --> 00:45:00,282Ave, Claudius Lapsus, let me taste.

    59200:45:00,449 --> 00:45:01,700No, it's my barrel.

    59300:45:01,867 --> 00:45:04,203It's not yours, it's everybody's.

    59400:45:13,087 --> 00:45:14,338Hey, you!

    59500:45:15,172 --> 00:45:16,548Come here.

    59600:45:36,068 --> 00:45:38,320- Do I knock him out?- Yes, quietly.

    59700:45:39,905 --> 00:45:41,115Obelix, quietly!

    598

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    00:45:41,657 --> 00:45:43,117I understood.

    59900:45:50,165 --> 00:45:51,750Very good.

    60000:46:13,188 --> 00:46:15,983You're a swell pal.

    60100:46:17,067 --> 00:46:19,153Come on, we've no time to lose.

    60200:46:27,619 --> 00:46:30,456I can drink this,I didn't fall into it.

    60300:46:41,508 --> 00:46:42,885Over here.

    60400:46:46,972 --> 00:46:49,183Take them all. We'll sort them later.

    60500:46:49,349 --> 00:46:50,976Obelix, help us.

    60600:46:58,025 --> 00:46:59,318I don't believe it.

    607

    00:46:59,818 --> 00:47:03,363I just tasted a tiny bit.Hardly at all.

    60800:47:07,367 --> 00:47:08,952Like the great Caesar said,

    60900:47:09,119 --> 00:47:13,165we are here to promotethe values of our grand civilisation.

    61000:47:13,749 --> 00:47:15,292But we will not succeed

    61100:47:15,459 --> 00:47:17,711if the natives perceive us as enemies.

    61200:47:17,878 --> 00:47:19,463

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    The Britons are proud.

    61300:47:19,630 --> 00:47:23,675Treat them with courtesy.Show them we are a great nation.

    61400:47:24,635 --> 00:47:27,221Here's an opportunity to demonstrate.

    61500:47:27,888 --> 00:47:29,890A jolly good day

    61600:47:30,265 --> 00:47:32,976and all that sort of thing,British friends.

    61700:47:34,520 --> 00:47:37,731You see? If we don't,we have a fat chance.

    61800:47:38,232 --> 00:47:39,691Who called me fat?

    61900:47:41,568 --> 00:47:42,528Who called me fat?

    62000:47:44,530 --> 00:47:45,822Who called me fat?

    62100:47:46,490 --> 00:47:47,324Obelix!

    62200:47:47,491 --> 00:47:49,243Goodness gracious.

    62300:47:54,039 --> 00:47:58,085An abandoned cart...A pure stroke of luck for a cart thief!

    62400:47:59,253 --> 00:48:01,922Bravo, Obelix! Good job blending in.

    62500:48:06,468 --> 00:48:07,386Run, Jolitorax!

    62600:48:08,679 --> 00:48:11,974

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    Sorry, Asterix, a gentleman never runs.

    62700:48:28,407 --> 00:48:30,450Excuse me, you didn't see a...

    62800:48:30,617 --> 00:48:33,620- You're a Gaul!- Yes, but not from Lutetia.

    62900:48:33,787 --> 00:48:35,289What're you doing here?

    63000:48:35,455 --> 00:48:37,332Looking for a barrel.Did you see...

    63100:48:37,499 --> 00:48:38,584I love Gauls!

    63200:48:39,126 --> 00:48:41,628You're so much more fun than Britons.

    63300:48:41,795 --> 00:48:42,963Thanks... Oh really?

    63400:48:45,716 --> 00:48:49,094You don't have a pigeonholewhere I could reach you?

    63500:49:02,190 --> 00:49:04,443It's one of the Gauls.

    63600:49:04,943 --> 00:49:06,194Pick him up!

    63700:49:15,829 --> 00:49:19,791Sir Jolitorax!Something unspeakable has happened.

    63800:49:19,958 --> 00:49:22,085I say, calm down, Miss Macintosh.

    63900:49:22,252 --> 00:49:25,797It's frightful!Miss Ophelia has disappeared.

    640

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    00:49:25,964 --> 00:49:27,424Calm down, dear lady.

    64100:49:27,591 --> 00:49:29,760And worse yet, with Goudurix!

    64200:49:31,386 --> 00:49:34,139They wanted to take a strollon the beach.

    64300:49:34,389 --> 00:49:36,850Naturally, I flatly refused.

    64400:49:37,017 --> 00:49:38,769But that devil Goudurix

    64500:49:38,935 --> 00:49:41,313stole a cart and...

    64600:49:42,939 --> 00:49:44,691and the two of them ran off!

    64700:49:45,776 --> 00:49:48,570Very well. I shall handle this.

    64800:49:52,949 --> 00:49:54,242Which way did they go?

    649

    00:49:54,409 --> 00:49:55,911That way.

    65000:50:18,975 --> 00:50:20,143Oh, I'm awful.

    65100:50:20,310 --> 00:50:22,354No, no. You're doing great.

    65200:50:24,398 --> 00:50:28,610

    Why didn't you help themsearch for the barrel of magic potion?

    65300:50:28,777 --> 00:50:30,696You're my magic potion.

    65400:50:30,862 --> 00:50:32,155How sweet of you.

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    65500:50:32,322 --> 00:50:34,032It's not sweet, it's true.

    65600:50:34,199 --> 00:50:37,035Their potion has nothing to dowith strength.

    65700:50:37,202 --> 00:50:37,828Really?

    65800:50:38,412 --> 00:50:40,205Then what is strength about?

    65900:50:41,415 --> 00:50:42,040This...

    66000:50:43,834 --> 00:50:45,293

    That's not appropriate.

    66100:50:45,460 --> 00:50:49,339You Brits are so uptight.Chicks are easier in Lutetia.

    66200:50:49,506 --> 00:50:50,215Really?

    66300:50:50,382 --> 00:50:53,635

    You bet! They know kissingisn't about being appropriate.

    66400:50:53,802 --> 00:50:56,555It's about timing...and this was the right time.

    66500:50:56,722 --> 00:50:58,348But if you don't want to...

    666

    00:50:59,975 --> 00:51:01,143Wait...

    66700:51:11,737 --> 00:51:13,113It's a Gaul kiss.

    66800:51:16,032 --> 00:51:17,367Come on, it's no big...

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    66900:51:19,369 --> 00:51:21,997- Are those Britons?- They're not very big.

    67000:51:22,164 --> 00:51:24,458Hiding behind me?That's very cowardly.

    67100:51:24,624 --> 00:51:25,250I don't care.

    67200:51:25,417 --> 00:51:29,296We're looking for Caesar and his army.Do you know where they are?

    67300:51:29,463 --> 00:51:30,422I don't want to die!

    67400:51:30,589 --> 00:51:32,758- Pull yourself together.- I'm too afraid!

    67500:51:32,924 --> 00:51:35,385I say, you're the champion of fear!

    67600:51:35,552 --> 00:51:37,387Did you hear that, Yadutaf?

    67700:51:37,554 --> 00:51:40,182Catch him, Tetedepiaf,before he flies away.

    67800:51:45,812 --> 00:51:48,982I'll bring him to camp.Go to the nearest village,

    67900:51:49,149 --> 00:51:51,610ask for Caesar

    and then kill everyone.

    68000:51:51,777 --> 00:51:52,986How do I find the village?

    68100:51:54,321 --> 00:51:55,405She'll take you.

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    68200:51:55,572 --> 00:51:58,909- Then what do I do with her?- You kill her too, stupid.

    68300:51:59,075 --> 00:52:00,952Oh yeah, right.

    68400:52:38,198 --> 00:52:40,992A jolly good day to you, foreign friend.

    68500:52:43,787 --> 00:52:46,331Wait. First, we must agree on the rules.

    68600:52:46,873 --> 00:52:48,458What rules?

    68700:52:48,708 --> 00:52:49,876Okay, no rules.

    68800:53:00,011 --> 00:53:00,637Thank you.

    68900:53:00,804 --> 00:53:04,224It was nothing.I needed some exercise anyhow.

    69000:53:05,058 --> 00:53:07,060I hear you didn't go out alone.

    69100:53:07,227 --> 00:53:10,730The Normans kidnapped Goudurix!I'm very worried.

    69200:53:10,897 --> 00:53:12,315Rightly so, my dear.

    69300:53:12,482 --> 00:53:15,193The odds are

    he's been turned into melba toast.

    69400:53:15,527 --> 00:53:16,278How awful!

    69500:53:16,444 --> 00:53:18,113Yes, it is, eh what!

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    69600:53:18,947 --> 00:53:21,783Well then, I suggest we go home.

    69700:53:22,701 --> 00:53:24,452Your insensibility

    69800:53:24,619 --> 00:53:26,413saddens me deeply.

    69900:53:26,997 --> 00:53:29,249I too have reason to feel sad.

    70000:53:29,416 --> 00:53:32,377But I do not offend you by blaming you.

    70100:53:35,338 --> 00:53:38,300So be it!I strayed from the righteous path.

    70200:53:39,301 --> 00:53:41,511But how could I not?

    70300:53:41,928 --> 00:53:43,972You're as tediousas a winter's day

    70400:53:44,139 --> 00:53:46,016and stiffer than Miss Macintosh.

    70500:53:46,182 --> 00:53:48,518It took you six months to address me,

    70600:53:48,685 --> 00:53:50,353one year to ask for my hand,

    70700:53:50,520 --> 00:53:53,481and we've barely exchangedten words since.

    70800:53:54,399 --> 00:53:56,109When might I hope for

    70900:53:56,276 --> 00:53:58,028a bit of company,

    710

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    00:53:58,194 --> 00:54:00,739perhaps even some human warmth?

    71100:54:00,906 --> 00:54:02,616On my death bed?

    71200:54:05,035 --> 00:54:08,038My conduct has beenthat of a British gentleman.

    71300:54:08,204 --> 00:54:12,792If this does not suit you,then we were not meant for each other.

    71400:54:35,732 --> 00:54:36,858What're you doing here?

    71500:54:37,025 --> 00:54:39,611I was arrested during an ID check.

    71600:54:39,986 --> 00:54:42,197I'll be deported on the next caravan.

    71700:54:44,157 --> 00:54:45,116YOU!

    71800:54:45,992 --> 00:54:47,160Come with me.

    71900:54:50,705 --> 00:54:51,665Move it.

    72000:54:52,248 --> 00:54:52,916Excuse me,

    72100:54:53,083 --> 00:54:56,544may I have some water for my plant?It needs it badly.

    72200:55:02,801 --> 00:55:04,344Doesn't need it anymore.

    72300:55:25,490 --> 00:55:26,408Why?

    72400:55:26,825 --> 00:55:27,534

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    Why what?

    72500:55:27,701 --> 00:55:29,619Why are you always under my feet?

    72600:55:29,995 --> 00:55:33,540Hey, Jules, every talehas a good guy and a bad guy.

    72700:55:34,916 --> 00:55:36,292And you're the bad guy?

    72800:55:36,459 --> 00:55:37,794No, you're the bad guy.

    72900:55:37,961 --> 00:55:40,046These are the adventures of Asterix,not Caesar.

    73000:55:40,630 --> 00:55:43,383The adventures of Asterix!

    73100:55:44,175 --> 00:55:46,594See this? "The Gallic Wars."

    73200:55:47,012 --> 00:55:50,515The adventures of Julius Caesar,by Julius Caesar, in six volumes.

    73300:55:50,682 --> 00:55:53,476That my friend, is History.

    73400:55:54,185 --> 00:55:56,563Sounds megalomaniac to me.

    73500:55:57,272 --> 00:55:59,482I don't think you fully realisewho I am.

    73600:56:00,025 --> 00:56:03,153My reign will have such impactthat in 2,000 years

    73700:56:03,319 --> 00:56:06,906people will say,"We're in the year 2000 J.C."

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    73800:56:09,659 --> 00:56:11,369- But what have you done?- Me?

    73900:56:11,536 --> 00:56:14,622Yes, you with your smirk.What's your claim to fame?

    74000:56:14,789 --> 00:56:16,666I don't claim much.

    74100:56:17,083 --> 00:56:19,335I just try to be a decent guy.

    74200:56:19,502 --> 00:56:20,754I wake up happy.

    74300:56:21,463 --> 00:56:23,214

    My pals and I help each other.

    74400:56:23,381 --> 00:56:24,841We laugh, we argue.

    74500:56:25,008 --> 00:56:27,844And every Sunday,we eat a big wild boar together.

    74600:56:28,553 --> 00:56:30,096

    You've sold out.

    74700:56:30,388 --> 00:56:31,556No, I haven't.

    74800:56:31,723 --> 00:56:34,309In my village, I'm very respected.

    74900:56:34,476 --> 00:56:36,394- In your village?

    - Yes.

    75000:56:37,979 --> 00:56:39,439That doesn't thrill me.

    75100:56:40,899 --> 00:56:44,652Listen, I have a proposal to make.

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    75200:56:46,988 --> 00:56:49,157Come and work for me.

    75300:56:50,200 --> 00:56:53,411Your mind united with my power...

    75400:56:53,870 --> 00:56:55,580we'd make a smashing team.

    75500:56:56,706 --> 00:56:58,249Why would I do that?

    75600:56:59,876 --> 00:57:01,211Because I'm your father.

    75700:57:05,173 --> 00:57:06,132No...

    75800:57:06,299 --> 00:57:09,302You believed it! Yes, you did.

    75900:57:09,469 --> 00:57:11,012You fell for it!

    76000:57:11,179 --> 00:57:12,597Not at all.

    761

    00:57:13,807 --> 00:57:15,391Rubbish.

    76200:57:15,558 --> 00:57:17,435You're fighting the wrong battle.

    76300:57:17,602 --> 00:57:20,480Defending the oppressedis wasted sentimentality.

    764

    00:57:20,647 --> 00:57:23,149It might flatter the ego,but it's useless.

    76500:57:23,316 --> 00:57:27,028You barely save one raceand another massacres them.

    766

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    00:57:28,571 --> 00:57:32,408You must be realistic and lucid.There's no point.

    76700:57:33,076 --> 00:57:35,078Besides these Britons are odd.

    76800:57:35,537 --> 00:57:37,539They're playing Mr. Jolly now,

    76900:57:37,789 --> 00:57:42,210but at the first chance, they'lldeclare war on you for 100 years!

    77000:57:42,377 --> 00:57:44,087Listen to me.

    77100:57:44,254 --> 00:57:47,132You give me the barrel,

    I finish my invasion,

    77200:57:47,298 --> 00:57:50,385and we wipe out their civilisation.No more hot water,

    77300:57:50,552 --> 00:57:53,596no more boiled meat.And we make them talk normally.

    774

    00:57:53,763 --> 00:57:56,057Wouldn't that be a service to humanity?

    77500:57:57,308 --> 00:57:58,351Yes.

    77600:58:00,562 --> 00:58:01,729But no.

    77700:58:01,896 --> 00:58:02,772

    Take him away.

    77800:58:02,939 --> 00:58:06,109Torture him until he talks!Enough! He wears me out.

    77900:58:19,831 --> 00:58:21,583- He's awake!

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    - The champion's awake!

    78000:58:24,544 --> 00:58:26,838The champion! The champion!

    78100:58:32,969 --> 00:58:34,929Chief, it's the champion.

    78200:58:42,896 --> 00:58:44,230Scare us.

    78300:58:45,106 --> 00:58:46,691- Excuse me?- Scare us!

    78400:58:48,818 --> 00:58:53,072We travelled far to discover fear.I demand that you teach us.

    78500:58:53,615 --> 00:58:55,575Fear? Fear is...

    78600:58:55,992 --> 00:58:57,285I don't know...

    78700:58:57,452 --> 00:59:00,997You tremble, you sweat,your teeth chatter,

    78800:59:01,289 --> 00:59:02,707you get a stomach ache...

    78900:59:02,999 --> 00:59:05,376It's the flu! Fear is the flu!

    79000:59:05,543 --> 00:59:06,920How do you catch it?

    791

    00:59:07,086 --> 00:59:09,255I caught it kissing my cousin Epitafe.

    79200:59:29,859 --> 00:59:34,030For the last time, Norman,I'm asking you...

    79300:59:34,197 --> 00:59:36,532

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    Where did they take Goudurix?

    79400:59:40,078 --> 00:59:43,998My dear Ophelia,I fear that isn't proper behaviour.

    79500:59:44,165 --> 00:59:48,211Mr. Tetedepiaf,though your presence here was not

    79600:59:48,378 --> 00:59:50,797your choice, so to speak,

    79700:59:51,089 --> 00:59:55,468we shall do everythingto ensure you have a pleasant stay.

    79800:59:55,635 --> 01:00:00,848So please, if you have

    any needs whatsoever, just ask us.

    79901:00:04,936 --> 01:00:08,982You-want-me-give-something-you?

    80001:00:09,899 --> 01:00:10,525Drink!

    80101:00:11,276 --> 01:00:13,945I'm afraid I didn't hear correctly.

    80201:00:14,112 --> 01:00:16,322I want drink! Give me!

    80301:00:17,115 --> 01:00:20,410So many mistakes in so few words!

    80401:00:20,868 --> 01:00:23,913Firstly, one does not "want" something,

    80501:00:24,080 --> 01:00:25,081one "hopes".

    80601:00:25,248 --> 01:00:27,125Or at best, one "wishes".

    80701:00:27,292 --> 01:00:29,002

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    Secondly,

    80801:00:29,168 --> 01:00:32,422we Britons are very fussyabout forms of address.

    80901:00:32,588 --> 01:00:34,924Thirdly and last,

    81001:00:35,091 --> 01:00:38,344it is customary,when expressing a request,

    81101:00:38,511 --> 01:00:40,430to add polite phrases.

    81201:00:50,273 --> 01:00:51,649I'm thirsty!

    81301:00:52,859 --> 01:00:56,237This time, very exceptionally,

    81401:00:56,404 --> 01:00:59,115I shall show flexibility

    81501:00:59,282 --> 01:01:01,826and give into your request.

    816

    01:01:05,288 --> 01:01:06,122It's hot!

    81701:01:06,289 --> 01:01:08,875By Odin,you want to poison me, witch?

    81801:01:09,250 --> 01:01:10,585You, you... Untie me!

    819

    01:01:11,252 --> 01:01:12,462Untie me!

    82001:01:12,628 --> 01:01:14,547By Odin, untie me!

    82101:01:15,048 --> 01:01:16,007My dear Ophelia,

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    82201:01:16,174 --> 01:01:19,302I believe Mr. Tetedepiafwould greatly benefit

    82301:01:19,469 --> 01:01:23,514from a crash course in proper manners.

    82401:01:30,897 --> 01:01:32,857If several gentlemen are seated

    82501:01:33,024 --> 01:01:35,234and a lady enters the room,

    82601:01:35,401 --> 01:01:39,113the gentlemen must immediatelyget to their feet

    827

    01:01:39,697 --> 01:01:42,617and wait for the ladyto invite them to sit.

    82801:01:42,784 --> 01:01:46,037Either verbally or with a gentle nod.

    82901:01:47,080 --> 01:01:48,289Like this.

    830

    01:01:49,540 --> 01:01:51,626If the lady wishes to sit down,

    83101:01:51,793 --> 01:01:55,588one of the gentlemen,the first one to her left, of course,

    83201:01:56,130 --> 01:01:58,549must come and stand behind...

    833

    01:02:27,495 --> 01:02:30,790So, Gaul, where's the barrel?

    83401:02:32,834 --> 01:02:35,128Do you enjoy torturing people?

    83501:02:37,004 --> 01:02:40,383I mean, is it a job you'd recommend

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    83601:02:40,550 --> 01:02:41,759to Young people?

    83701:02:41,926 --> 01:02:45,012I'm serious,one rarely gets to meet you people.

    83801:02:45,179 --> 01:02:47,640And when you do,it's usually all over.

    83901:02:49,100 --> 01:02:50,435Where's the barrel?

    84001:02:52,019 --> 01:02:54,730In your case, was it a vocation?

    841

    01:02:54,897 --> 01:02:57,150A passion that became a profession?

    84201:02:57,316 --> 01:03:00,445Or did a career counsellor orient you?

    84301:03:00,611 --> 01:03:04,657Because it's obviously not a sideline,you do a fine job.

    844

    01:03:04,824 --> 01:03:06,492But then I thought,

    84501:03:06,659 --> 01:03:09,120if you didn't choose it, why continue?

    84601:03:10,663 --> 01:03:12,081Ok, ok!

    84701:03:13,040 --> 01:03:14,041

    I'll talk.

    84801:03:14,208 --> 01:03:15,668I feel like talking now.

    84901:03:21,299 --> 01:03:22,550I'm listening.

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    85001:03:24,469 --> 01:03:27,388What if we decided to call it quits?

    85101:03:27,555 --> 01:03:30,808Why don't we preachlove and fraternity instead?

    85201:03:31,309 --> 01:03:32,894Too bad for you, Gaul.

    85301:03:39,108 --> 01:03:40,026Yes?

    85401:03:40,651 --> 01:03:41,652Who is it?

    85501:03:45,656 --> 01:03:46,824A jolly good day.

    85601:03:46,991 --> 01:03:49,285I thought you'd never get here!

    85701:03:49,452 --> 01:03:51,120Free me, I'm burning up.

    85801:03:53,539 --> 01:03:54,832What're you waiting for?

    85901:03:54,999 --> 01:03:59,545I'm thinking about what you said.Each man for himself...

    86001:03:59,712 --> 01:04:01,088Obelix...

    86101:04:03,174 --> 01:04:05,843Maybe we should take a breather.

    86201:04:06,219 --> 01:04:07,637This isn't funny.

    86301:04:07,803 --> 01:04:10,515It's cruel of meto bring up ancient history.

    864

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    01:04:10,681 --> 01:04:13,684Let's go.We'll leave Asterix alone...

    86501:04:14,310 --> 01:04:15,561You want an apology?

    86601:04:15,728 --> 01:04:17,647Ok! But not like this.

    86701:04:18,105 --> 01:04:19,148Why not?

    86801:04:19,482 --> 01:04:22,527It'll mean nothing.I'll have done it under duress.

    86901:04:22,693 --> 01:04:25,196Free me,

    and I'll apologise of my own accord.

    87001:04:32,995 --> 01:04:37,333It's crazy,even their cranks turn the Wrong way!

    87101:04:38,000 --> 01:04:40,336What about your apology?

    87201:04:42,338 --> 01:04:44,840

    Goodbye, Pindepis.Sorry about your plant.

    87301:04:45,007 --> 01:04:48,886I kept the leaves. I'm surethey'll continue bringing me good luck.

    87401:04:49,053 --> 01:04:51,264Goodbye. And thanks again.

    875

    01:04:51,430 --> 01:04:52,765Where's the barrel?

    87601:04:53,849 --> 01:04:55,017Gone.

    87701:04:55,184 --> 01:04:57,103Then we'd be wise to split up.

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    87801:04:57,436 --> 01:05:00,106I'll look for the barrel.You, for Goudurix.

    87901:05:00,273 --> 01:05:01,691Goudurix? Why Goudurix?

    88001:05:11,701 --> 01:05:13,744You refuse to deliver your secret.

    88101:05:14,161 --> 01:05:15,997No, I swear...

    88201:05:16,163 --> 01:05:19,584We could cut him open to find his fear.

    88301:05:19,959 --> 01:05:21,168

    Yeah. Cut him open.

    88401:05:22,086 --> 01:05:24,338Cut him open! Cut him open!

    88501:05:25,798 --> 01:05:30,136Enough fun and games.Wake him up and take him to the cliff.

    88601:05:30,428 --> 01:05:33,055

    I want to see a flight demonstration.

    88701:05:34,390 --> 01:05:35,516Perfect.

    88801:05:36,350 --> 01:05:38,894A cloud of milkin your hot water, Mr. Tetedepiaf?

    88901:05:39,061 --> 01:05:40,563

    Thank you, a spot.

    89001:05:40,980 --> 01:05:42,898As you can see, Miss Macintosh

    89101:05:43,065 --> 01:05:46,527has transformed Mr. Tetedepiafinto a perfect gentleman.

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    89201:05:46,902 --> 01:05:48,195Unfortunately,

    89301:05:48,571 --> 01:05:51,449he still refuses to saywhere Goudurix was taken.

    89401:05:51,616 --> 01:05:53,659Believe me when I say I'm sorry,

    89501:05:53,826 --> 01:05:57,538but a gentleman never betrayshis companions-in-arms.

    89601:06:01,083 --> 01:06:05,087We'll let him escape.He'll lead us to his people.

    89701:06:07,506 --> 01:06:08,799Miss Macintosh,

    89801:06:08,966 --> 01:06:12,303could you come to the kitchenwith me for a minute?

    89901:06:20,269 --> 01:06:21,479Say, Obelix...

    90001:06:22,188 --> 01:06:25,941weren't we supposed to goboar hunting in the forest?

    90101:06:27,443 --> 01:06:28,402No, Why?

    90201:06:28,569 --> 01:06:30,279Yes, I said to you,

    90301:06:30,988 --> 01:06:33,699"Let's go boar hunting in the forest."

    90401:06:34,408 --> 01:06:37,203Oh yes, of course!Let's go to the forest!

    905

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    01:06:37,370 --> 01:06:38,162There you go.

    90601:06:38,329 --> 01:06:41,457Yes, let's go boar huntingin the forest!

    90701:06:42,124 --> 01:06:43,876That's what I said.

    90801:06:44,210 --> 01:06:45,628Ready to go?

    90901:06:45,795 --> 01:06:47,046Where?

    91001:06:50,091 --> 01:06:53,260What? I know it's for fake.

    91101:07:03,270 --> 01:07:04,563What do you want?

    91201:07:06,065 --> 01:07:09,777Excuse me for disturbing you,but is that your cart?

    91301:07:10,486 --> 01:07:12,238What do you care?

    91401:07:12,655 --> 01:07:15,700It contained some barrelsthat were stolen from me.

    91501:07:16,242 --> 01:07:17,034And?

    91601:07:17,201 --> 01:07:21,080And I believe their disappearanceis not news to you.

    91701:07:21,247 --> 01:07:25,209Are you insinuatingthat I look like a thief?

    91801:07:26,794 --> 01:07:27,420Well...

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    91901:07:29,714 --> 01:07:30,715Yes.

    92001:07:35,678 --> 01:07:37,471Are we going to the forest?

    92101:08:19,972 --> 01:08:22,475Ok, I'll take care of it.

    92201:08:24,560 --> 01:08:26,479Have a seat, Mr. Tetedepiaf.

    92301:08:26,645 --> 01:08:28,522I just wanted to know

    92401:08:28,689 --> 01:08:30,691if you intended to stay for supper?

    92501:08:30,858 --> 01:08:32,860Because if you did,

    92601:08:33,027 --> 01:08:36,489I shall need to dosome extra grocery shopping.

    92701:08:38,449 --> 01:08:40,534I would truly be delighted.

    92801:08:40,701 --> 01:08:42,953Unfortunately, I have another date.

    92901:09:06,268 --> 01:09:08,103I didn't quite get that.

    93001:09:08,270 --> 01:09:11,941It's simple. I hinted thathe was not expected for supper

    93101:09:12,107 --> 01:09:15,653and like a perfect gentleman,he did not wish to abuse my hospitality

    93201:09:16,195 --> 01:09:18,072and so he left.

    933

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    01:09:18,239 --> 01:09:19,156That's all.

    93401:09:19,490 --> 01:09:21,325That's all.

    93501:09:29,542 --> 01:09:30,876A jolly good day to you.

    93601:09:31,502 --> 01:09:32,962Likewise.

    93701:09:39,510 --> 01:09:40,928Oh no...

    93801:10:01,448 --> 01:10:02,575No!

    939

    01:10:04,243 --> 01:10:07,413No! I'll do anything you want!

    94001:10:07,580 --> 01:10:09,331I'll learn Norman! Eat seal!

    94101:10:10,040 --> 01:10:12,084Dye my hair blond!Don't throw me!

    942

    01:10:12,251 --> 01:10:13,294Have mercy!

    94301:10:13,460 --> 01:10:16,672- What's "mercy"?- Another of their inventions.

    94401:10:18,340 --> 01:10:22,094You fly down there, make a turn,then land over there.

    94501:10:22,261 --> 01:10:24,138Don't worry about the itinerary.

    94601:10:24,305 --> 01:10:25,514It's all mapped out.

    94701:10:26,015 --> 01:10:27,433

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    Ok, go.

    94801:10:31,478 --> 01:10:32,563No!

    94901:10:32,730 --> 01:10:33,480Look!

    95001:10:34,732 --> 01:10:35,608Tetedepiaf!

    95101:10:45,200 --> 01:10:47,620A jolly good day to you, Chief.

    95201:10:47,786 --> 01:10:50,623May this humble bouquettouch your heart.

    953

    01:10:51,123 --> 01:10:52,374In any case,

    95401:10:52,541 --> 01:10:54,209I picked it with love.

    95501:10:58,797 --> 01:11:02,009We're not hereto taste the local specialties.

    956

    01:11:02,259 --> 01:11:03,218Where were you?

    95701:11:03,385 --> 01:11:05,387I was a guest in a fine home

    95801:11:05,554 --> 01:11:08,390where the hospitalitywas irreproachable.

    959

    01:11:08,557 --> 01:11:09,642But no matter...

    96001:11:10,017 --> 01:11:13,520I'm unspeakably happyto see you all again.

    96101:11:15,522 --> 01:11:16,982

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    You're right, no sentimentality.

    96201:11:19,234 --> 01:11:21,195Okay, let's go...

    96301:11:22,738 --> 01:11:24,031He's been bewitched.

    96401:11:24,198 --> 01:11:25,157Bewitched!

    96501:11:26,825 --> 01:11:29,536No, you're mistaken.I wasn't bewitched,

    96601:11:29,703 --> 01:11:30,955I was educated.

    967

    01:11:31,580 --> 01:11:32,289Educated?

    96801:11:32,456 --> 01:11:34,083Indeed. Educated.

    96901:11:34,708 --> 01:11:35,626BY Who?

    97001:11:36,627 --> 01:11:37,378

    By her...

    97101:11:40,839 --> 01:11:43,592She'll educate us too!Like Tetedepiaf!

    97201:11:45,386 --> 01:11:46,929You there!

    97301:11:48,097 --> 01:11:50,432

    Come here so I can punish you!

    97401:11:51,016 --> 01:11:52,643What's happening to us?

    97501:11:52,810 --> 01:11:55,187- My body's trembling!- I'm sweating!

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    97601:11:55,354 --> 01:11:56,480I have a stomach ache!

    97701:11:56,647 --> 01:11:58,941That means we're afraid!

    97801:12:03,153 --> 01:12:04,279Follow me!

    97901:12:04,446 --> 01:12:07,449Now that we've mastered fear,we'll fly away.

    98001:12:13,372 --> 01:12:14,248Hey you!

    98101:13:03,756 --> 01:13:05,340

    Get back here!

    98201:13:05,507 --> 01:13:07,885Savage! Brutish lout!Moron!

    98301:13:08,594 --> 01:13:09,720You and your people

    98401:13:09,887 --> 01:13:11,638

    are backward beasts!

    98501:13:11,805 --> 01:13:15,559Savages, vandals, pigs!What am I saying?

    98601:13:15,726 --> 01:13:19,229Bacon on legswith cottage cheese brains!

    987

    01:13:21,607 --> 01:13:23,692And all that sort of thing.

    98801:13:33,118 --> 01:13:36,997I'm so hungryI could eat my own stomach.

    98901:13:38,707 --> 01:13:40,667

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    How would you digest it?

    99001:13:40,834 --> 01:13:42,711A new message from Jolitorax.

    99101:13:42,878 --> 01:13:45,923Thank God!I hope he'll soon be here.

    99201:13:46,090 --> 01:13:49,384"I hope Her Majesty is welland in good health.

    99301:13:49,551 --> 01:13:52,721"The weather here is mildwith scattered showers,

    99401:13:52,888 --> 01:13:54,223"but nothing worrying.

    99501:13:55,057 --> 01:13:57,434"Your faithful servant, Jolitorax."

    99601:13:58,685 --> 01:14:00,896Send a message to Jolitorax.

    99701:14:01,063 --> 01:14:04,108I want to know where that barrel is.

    99801:14:19,164 --> 01:14:20,874Mr. Obelix...

    99901:14:21,416 --> 01:14:22,084Yes?

    100001:14:22,251 --> 01:14:26,171Would you have the good graceto forget what you saw and heard

    100101:14:26,338 --> 01:14:27,673by the cliff earlier?

    100201:14:27,840 --> 01:14:31,468You can count on me.I'll be as mute as a dolmen.

    1003

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    01:14:32,469 --> 01:14:34,596Thank you, Mr. Obelix.

    100401:14:36,056 --> 01:14:39,434It would seemthat you are a gentleman after all.

    100501:14:42,855 --> 01:14:44,982That's not enough! I need four!

    100601:14:45,149 --> 01:14:46,400One, two, three and four!

    100701:14:46,733 --> 01:14:48,735The 8th Legion arrives in six days.

    100801:14:48,902 --> 01:14:51,738Too long!Tell them to step up the pace.

    100901:14:52,030 --> 01:14:54,950The men haven't sleptunder a roof in weeks.

    101001:14:55,117 --> 01:14:58,203So what? This is the country.Camping's fun, no?

    101101:14:58,370 --> 01:15:01,665

    A message from Langelus:"Build fortification."

    101201:15:01,832 --> 01:15:03,292No time!Let me talk to him!

    101301:15:03,458 --> 01:15:05,460Hello, Langelus?

    1014

    01:15:05,627 --> 01:15:06,753Hello?

    101501:15:08,255 --> 01:15:09,840Lang... It doesn't work.

    101601:15:11,175 --> 01:15:12,509It doesn't work!

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    101701:15:57,012 --> 01:15:58,680I'll never understand women.

    101801:16:00,140 --> 01:16:02,351If you don't look, you don't find.

    101901:16:02,517 --> 01:16:04,686But you can't look too hard either.

    102001:16:04,853 --> 01:16:08,065So you have to look without looking

    102101:16:08,232 --> 01:16:10,400while pretending not to look.

    102201:16:11,818 --> 01:16:13,737That's over my head.

    102301:16:16,198 --> 01:16:17,699What do you say?

    102401:16:18,033 --> 01:16:19,159I think women...

    102501:16:19,326 --> 01:16:20,911No, shut up.

    102601:16:22,079 --> 01:16:23,288I like it better.

    102701:16:25,457 --> 01:16:26,333Well?

    102801:16:26,500 --> 01:16:28,543I think I know where the barrel is.

    1029

    01:16:28,710 --> 01:16:32,589It was sold to an innkeeperwho sold it to the Camulodunum team.

    103001:16:32,756 --> 01:16:33,882The team of what?

    103101:16:34,049 --> 01:16:35,717

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    A typically British sport

    103201:16:35,884 --> 01:16:39,179where two teams of 15 playersfight over a bladder.

    103301:16:39,513 --> 01:16:40,681Sounds like fun.

    103401:16:40,847 --> 01:16:43,350Camulodunum is playing today.

    103501:16:43,517 --> 01:16:45,560The barrel's sure to be there.

    103601:16:45,727 --> 01:16:47,479I'll get Obelix and we're off.

    1037

    01:16:53,986 --> 01:16:55,821I challenge you to a duel.

    103801:16:57,197 --> 01:17:00,659You have no ideawhat I've been through. So just...

    103901:17:01,576 --> 01:17:03,578Take that sword and fight, coward!

    1040

    01:17:04,413 --> 01:17:05,956Are you nuts? That hurt!

    104101:17:06,123 --> 01:17:06,957What's going on?

    104201:17:07,457 --> 01:17:10,085I fear this is a private matter.

    104301:17:16,550 --> 01:17:18,510

    I think he's using psychology.

    104401:17:18,927 --> 01:17:21,138- What if something happens?- We'll explain.

    104501:17:28,103 --> 01:17:29,062Well?

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    104601:17:30,063 --> 01:17:32,274We'll explain it.

    104701:17:32,649 --> 01:17:34,860Does your cowardice know no limits?

    104801:17:35,319 --> 01:17:36,820It's not cowardice!

    104901:17:36,987 --> 01:17:40,532Please,don't claim your honour is at stake.

    105001:17:40,699 --> 01:17:43,201You merely wishto appease your jealousy.

    1051

    01:17:43,618 --> 01:17:45,162I think she's got a point.

    105201:17:45,329 --> 01:17:47,581You are prompt to criticise me again.

    105301:17:47,748 --> 01:17:50,000And you persist in shirking your duty.

    105401:17:50,167 --> 01:17:52,586

    - What do you mean?- Seems obvious to me.

    105501:17:53,837 --> 01:17:55,756You really are too stupid.

    105601:17:55,922 --> 01:17:57,924So be it! Kill him!

    105701:17:59,092 --> 01:18:02,804

    But if you do, you shall loseall credibility in my eyes.

    105801:18:03,680 --> 01:18:07,184True courage is notkilling a young fool in a duel...

    105901:18:07,351 --> 01:18:09,478

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    It's daring to look a woman in the eye

    106001:18:09,644 --> 01:18:12,272and tell her your feelings.

    106101:18:24,993 --> 01:18:28,080Women, women, women...

    106201:18:28,538 --> 01:18:31,666Weak and disappointing creatures.

    106301:18:34,002 --> 01:18:38,006She's right, it's importantto express your feelings.

    106401:18:38,173 --> 01:18:39,091Really?

    1065

    01:18:39,257 --> 01:18:41,259Yeah. If you love her, tell her.

    106601:18:41,426 --> 01:18:43,303Let it all hang out, old man.

    106701:18:45,931 --> 01:18:47,307Ophelia?

    106801:18:53,355 --> 01:18:56,024

    I wanted to tell youabout my feelings.

    106901:19:00,695 --> 01:19:02,197Miss Macintosh.

    107001:19:04,866 --> 01:19:07,077Jolly nice day, eh what?

    107101:19:09,079 --> 01:19:12,082

    I feel totally empty.

    107201:19:12,374 --> 01:19:13,917I have no energy.

    107301:19:14,084 --> 01:19:16,837I've encountered obstacles in the past,

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    107401:19:17,003 --> 01:19:19,923but usually,the desire to conquer wins out.

    107501:19:20,090 --> 01:19:22,968This time, my batteries are dead.

    107601:19:23,593 --> 01:19:25,470This desire to conquer...

    107701:19:25,637 --> 01:19:27,639What does it evoke?

    107801:19:27,806 --> 01:19:30,684Power and glory. I won't lie to you.

    107901:19:30,851 --> 01:19:31,726Power?

    108001:19:32,853 --> 01:19:35,856Dominating others. Subjugating them.

    108101:19:36,022 --> 01:19:39,443And also, I like it when peopleare indebted towards me.

    108201:19:40,068 --> 01:19:42,863For example, I enjoy granting pardons.

    108301:19:43,780 --> 01:19:47,284When a condemned manis about to be executed,

    108401:19:47,451 --> 01:19:50,203I show up at the last minuteand pardon him.

    108501:19:50,370 --> 01:19:53,290

    I like that a lot.Yes, I like that a lot.

    108601:19:53,457 --> 01:19:55,041It's very pleasant.

    108701:20:23,778 --> 01:20:25,030What are the rules?

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    108801:20:25,197 --> 01:20:26,198It's simple.

    108901:20:26,364 --> 01:20:30,368Each team must carry the bladderover the other team's goal line.

    109001:20:30,535 --> 01:20:32,454Almost anything's allowed,

    109101:20:32,621 --> 01:20:34,664except the use of weapons.

    109201:20:34,831 --> 01:20:37,167Unless there's a prior agreement.

    109301:20:42,339 --> 01:20:43,798

    The stadium is too big.

    109401:20:43,965 --> 01:20:46,218We need a man at every exit.

    109501:20:46,384 --> 01:20:48,053Hey, I'm the one who decides.

    109601:20:49,846 --> 01:20:52,474The stadium is too big.

    We'll change tactics.

    109701:20:52,933 --> 01:20:54,392You, you and you...

    109801:20:54,726 --> 01:20:56,061watch the other exits.

    109901:20:56,228 --> 01:20:57,938You, go for reinforcements.

    110001:20:58,563 --> 01:21:00,190Excellent idea!

    110101:21:20,293 --> 01:21:21,586Look! What's he doing?

    1102

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    01:21:27,551 --> 01:21:28,802You're out!

    110301:21:29,719 --> 01:21:31,763That is not a gentleman.

    110401:21:54,452 --> 01:21:55,954This is great.

    110501:22:20,437 --> 01:22:23,273That's the magic potionor some very good wine.

    110601:22:38,580 --> 01:22:41,124We've been through hard times.

    110701:22:41,875 --> 01:22:44,961But today,unless the sky falls on our heads...

    110801:22:45,128 --> 01:22:46,838- What's that noise?- What?

    110901:22:47,005 --> 01:22:49,215I said, what's that whistling?

    111001:22:52,636 --> 01:22:53,303Oh no...

    111101:22:57,474 --> 01:23:01,353I'm tired. I'm so tired.

    111201:23:04,689 --> 01:23:07,150Excuse me. This barrel is ours,we'd like it back.

    111301:23:07,317 --> 01:23:08,652In the name of Rome!

    111401:23:08,818 --> 01:23:10,362I requisition that barrel.

    111501:23:10,695 --> 01:23:12,113Take the barrel and run.

    1116

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    01:23:14,866 --> 01:23:16,326It's my barrel.

    111701:23:16,868 --> 01:23:18,119Let go!

    111801:23:22,540 --> 01:23:23,833Let's go.

    111901:23:28,088 --> 01:23:29,214Halt!

    112001:23:29,881 --> 01:23:31,257In the name of Rome!

    112101:23:31,424 --&g