Asser tive Communication And Linguistic SkillsAsser tive Communication And Linguistic Skills SELF...

A s s e r t i v e C o m m u n i c a t i o n A n d L i n g u i s t i c S k i l l s

SELF ESTEEM IS KEY FOR CHANGING THE WORLD



•  Introduction •  TED Talk •  Philosophy of dialogue •  Assertive communication •  10 rights



•  Power techniques •  8 linguistic skills •  TED talk •  Summary



Introduction

•  Who am I? •  What is IOGT International? •  How do we roll in this session?



TED Talk “Your body language shapes who you are” by Amy Cuddy



Philosophy of dialogue

•  Screens of perception •  Seeing one another •  Finding the same level •  Talking with humans



Assertive communication •  Definition Fair feeling of responsibility for your own actions and demanding the same from others To know where your responsibility starts and ends •  Natural versus unnatural assertive behavior •  Continuum: Passivity – Assertivity – Aggression



Group discussion… •  Find examples and explore examples for the two

extremes of the continuum of comunication: passivity and aggression •  6 minutes time to discuss and share in the group •  Choose an example to present •  De-briefing



Assertive communication •  Continuum from one extreme to the other: Passivity – Assertivity – Aggression

•  Passivity is … •  Aggression is …



Assertive communication Passivity is … •  Already giving counter argument •  Agreeing with everything •  Not necessarily being silent •  Not being able to say no •  Always looking for ways not to bother anyone



Assertive communication Aggression is … •  Your own intentions are the middle of the world •  Not seeing/ accepting another’s argument •  Disagreeing for the sake of disagreeing



10 rights for assertive communication

#1 •  You yourself are the judge to your

beahvior, thoughts, emotions and your are resonsible for it.




#2 •  You don’t need to offer any

excuses that would explain your behavior.




#3 •  You yourself judge how much

responsibility you carry for the solution of other people’s problems.




#4 •  You have the right to

change your opinion.




#5 •  You have the right to make

mistakes and be responsible for them.




#6 •  It’s okay to say ’I don’t

know’.




#7 •  You have the right to be

independent of the goodwill of others.




#8 •  You have the right to take

irrational decisions.




#9 •  You have the right to say ’I

don’t understand you’.




#10 •  You have the right to say ’It

does not matter to me’.



Group work… •  Each group to pick 2 rights •  Discuss each right for 3 minutes •  Present discussion of each right, 1 minute

respectively •  De-briefing



Group work presentation… •  Present discussion of each right, 1 minute

respectively •  De-briefing



Power techniques

•  Making someone invisible •  Ridicule someone or an argument •  Keeping information secret/ hidden, out

of reach •  Doubbel punishment



Power techniques

•  Guilt and shame •  Objectification •  Violence and threatening •  Showing status and hierarchy



You are not powerless… Strategies against

•  Take space •  Question •  Put the cards on the table •  Break a pattern •  Intellectualize



You can create change… Strategies supporting welcome behavior

•  Making visible •  Show respect •  Inform •  Dubbel reward •  Confirm positive norms •  TAKE RESPONSIBILITY



8 linguistic skills •  Broken record style Signal there’s patience

•  Half-open door style Admit points from cp

•  Negative assertion style Completely agree with cp

•  Negative questioning style Invite all possible negative stuff



8 linguistic skills •  Self-confidence Take blocks away

•  Free information style No hidden agenda

•  Acceptable compromise style Lose-lose is win-win

•  Selective ignorance style Shield yourself from emotional attacks



8 linguistic skills •  Broken record style Signal there’s patience •  Half-open door style Admit points from cp •  Negative assertion style Completely agree with cp •  Negative questioning

style Invite all possible negative stuff

•  Self-confidence Take blocks away •  Free information style No hidden agenda •  Acceptable compromise

style Lose-lose is win-win •  Selective ignorance style Shield yourself from emotional attacks



Broadway of linguistic skills •  Pick one skill, don’t tell other groups •  Prepare a piece of theater •  5 minutes preparation time •  Ca. 2min show-time



What just happened?



TED Talk “The Power of vulnerability” by Brene Brown



Summary •  Philosophy of dialogue •  10 assertive communication rights •  Power techniques •  8 linguistic skills •  Body language •  Me, my organization, the world



SELF-ESTEEM VALUES CHANGE

Summary •  Philosophy of dialogue •  Body language •  Me, my organization, the world




Summary •  10 assertive communication rights




Summary •  Power techniques •  8 linguistic skills








Life Set Free

Thank you! Maik Dünnbier

[email protected]

@maikduennbier @IOGTInt

www.iogt.org

Life Set Free



Asser tive Communication And Linguistic SkillsAsser tive Communication And Linguistic Skills SELF...

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