A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

108
The first recap of the Vetinari Dualegacy, covering the Founders through the rebuild at Generation 4. This mostly just hits the high points. For more details, and more about the spares, you'll just have to read the whole thing!

description

A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1: recap of Gens 1-4 of the Vetinari Dualegacy

Transcript of A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Page 1: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

The first recap of the Vetinari Dualegacy, covering the Founders through the rebuild at Generation 4.

This mostly just hits the high points. For more details, and more about the spares, you'll just have to read the whole thing!

Page 2: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

"What's up? So, I was sitting around sorting through pictures, and I thought to myself, 'Self, it just might be time for a recap.' What better way to get back on track after the rebuild than to go through the four generations that came before? The old fans can refresh their memories (and maybe catch sight of a few never-before-seen pics along the way), and the new fans can get caught up (but of course you're going to go back and read through all of it, aren't you? I thought so!).

"This is basically a down-and-dirty who's who and what's what, sort of a basic character and plot guide to the first four generations of the Vetinari Dualegacy, up to Gen 4 leaving college when I got hit by the Bork Of Doom. From PseudoBruty to Spider Jerusalem, it's all here!

"Enjoy!"

Page 3: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

The Vetinari Dualegacy is a concurrent 10-generation Prettacy and Uglacy begun with identical twin Founders, Isaac (left) and Orson (right). The two have the same genetics, middle-of-the-road facial features, and moderate Aries personalities. At the end of college, the one with the prettiest girlfriend would found the Prettacy, and the one with the ugliest girlfriend would found the Uglacy.

The sophomore year re-roll, obligatory for Founders, left Orson a Popularity Sim and Isaac a Pleasure Sim, somewhat problematic given Isaac's three playful points.

Page 4: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Dorks to the last, Isaac and Orson would wave at each other every day when they got back from class--the exact same class, given that they were both in the Philosophy major.

They both graduated with 4.0s and moved back to Riverblossom Hills; Isaac would found the Prettacy, Orson the Uglacy. And so the genetic experiment begins! How far can I get identical genetics given nine generations of selective breeding? We'll just have to wait and see.

Page 5: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Orson rose to the top of the Culinary career, becoming Permaplat and marrying Yvette, aka PseudoBruty. He loved her, despite her complete lack of interest in anything that wasn't skilling, propensity for wandering around looking empty-headed, and utter inability to remember his name.

She sucked and I hate her. Can you tell?

Page 6: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

PseudoBruty gave birth to the oldest of Gen 2, a boy named Larch whom she promptly dropped on the bedroom floor; making the bed and cleaning the counters took precendence over bonding with the baby.

Orson, however, made up the difference, somehow knowing that the tiny child would someday be able to paint Masterpieces that he could sell for the Aspiration points.

When Larch became a toddler, the full effect of his personality became apparent, and it was a doozy--ten neat and outgoing, nine active, three playful, and a whopping one nice point. Much to Orson's dismay, Larch easily took to plotting his eventual world domination and Eeevil.

At some point, PseudoBruty may have realized that there was a short blonde guy walking around. Or maybe not. It's so hard to tell.

Page 7: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Isaac married Calista, his college girlfriend whose nose continues to haunt the Prettacy to this day. Pleasure Sim Isaac and Family Sim Calista got along great, since the dates in Isaac's Want Panel tended to lead to the babies in Calista's.

I'd have liked Calista less if I'd known about the nose thing. But I'd still have liked her more than PseudoBruty.

Page 8: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

It wasn't long before Isaac and Calista welcomed Banyan, their sloppy, nice daughter who was instantly adored by everyone who met her.

Isaac could often be found snuggling his little girl, or playing with her, or tucking her in at night, and trying to beat Calista to the punch when she wanted to do the same things.

Page 9: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Over at the Uglacy, Orson and PseudoBruty had another son, Cypress, who suffered from the First-Born Effect. He was completely identical to Larch in both appearance and personality, right down to Larch's one nice point.

Right from the start, the two brothers were antagonistic to each other, driving Orson crazy with their bickering and plotting.

And as if that weren't bad enough...

Page 10: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

...Calista, following a long-honored Legacy tradition, gave birth to twin girls just after she and Isaac built themselves a decent house and were therefore slightly strapped for cash to buy wardrobes for the Well-Dressed Sims handicap.

The twins, Juniper and Sycamore, were as adored by their parents as their big sister Banyan.

Page 11: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Larch, now a teenager, lived up to his one nice point, and never stopped trying to cheat at chess, even if his equally nasty little brother usually caught him.

Isaac decided to throw a birthday party for the twins, and Larch, who'd become a Family Sim, grabbed Sycamore and fed her a bottle, joking about making her Eeevil. Nobody was laughing when Sycamore grew up to have the exact same personality as Larch and Cypress, however, least of all Orson and Isaac.

Page 12: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Despite her personality, Sycamore (right) was great friends with both her sisters, but was especially close to her twin, Juniper (left). However, her relationship with her "boss" Larch surpassed any other, and she took his cause to heart--Larch's side wins, Cypress's side loses.

Page 13: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

When it came time to choose an heir, Orson ultimately chose Eeevil Family Sim Larch over Eeevil Knowledge Sim Cypress. While he acknowledged that an Eeevil heir of any kind wouldn't have been his first choice, Larch would want to protect his family where Cypress wouldn't, ensuring that the Legacy would endure.

Both Orson and Larch agreed that it would be best for Cypress to remain in the dark about the Legacy and Orson's choice of heir for as long as possible, giving Larch time to counter-plot.

Page 14: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

As Larch had made a minion of Sycamore, so did Cypress attempt to make a minion of Banyan, intending to exploit her popularity for his own ends. Banyan tended to view the whole thing as a game, but played along, not realizing the seriousness of Cypress's plans.

Juniper and Sycamore and their three playful points each rolled Pleasure when they hit teen, making a grand total of three serious Pleasure Sims in one house. That was three serious Pleasure Sims too many.

Page 15: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

However clever Cypress thought he was, though, Larch was resoundingly unimpressed, and took every opportunity to assert his superiority over his brother, while being careful never to mention the Uglacy.

Even without knowing about the Legacy and the heirship, Cypress was determined to set himself against Larch, and to be the cause of Larch's complete and utter failure.

Page 16: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

When it was Isaac's turn to choose his heir, he opted for Juniper over his Eeevil daughter Sycamore and the slightly flaky Banyan. For her part, Juniper treated it as an adventure, and was fully supported by her sisters.

With the heirs chosen, it was time for Gen 2 to head to college and find spouses for the heirs.

Page 17: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Larch, the first to arrive at college, traded his teen coif for a fauxhawk and began his reign of terror as a naked hot-tubber.

Larch being Larch, he joined the Secret Society for the sole purpose of ransacking their Career Rewards, stealing their camera, fingerprint gun, Bone Phone, and cowplant (whom he named Brunhilde).

Page 18: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Larch also being Larch, he didn't waste any time making enemies, starting with a hapless smelly Dormie named Kevin, and moving through the ranks of the mascots, on one occasion stalking a Llama Mascot until such time as he could beat it up.

Page 19: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

On the side of not being a total nasty piece of work, Larch wooed and WooHooed Christy, a Dormie with a mashed-in face whose three nice points made her seem like a real peach next to Larch, Cypress, and Sycamore.

Page 20: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Sycamore, who'd changed to Family aspiration after her sophomore year, bagged Bluewater Village's Most Eligible Bachelor, Malcolm Landgraab IV, whom she'd known since her teen years.

Malcolm liked to hang around the dorm and bask in the heart-farts from anyone who walked into the room. Sycamore liked to hot-tub naked and shock passers-by.

Page 21: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Not realizing that Cypress had no idea about the Dualegacy, Banyan made an offhand comment about heirship during a conversation with Cypress, and, when he professed confusion, explained everything. Cypress immediately connected this information with things Larch had said, and went off to confront his brother, leaving a very guilty Banyan behind.

Page 22: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Cypress's conversation with Larch was as enlightening as his talk with Banyan, if carried out at a higher volume and with far more scowls.

When Cypress told Larch that he, Cypress, should be considered equally for heir, Larch was forced to reveal that he, not Cypress, would be producing Gen 3 of the Uglacy, and that no amount of angry faces would change that fact. Cypress, understandably furious, vowed revenge.

Page 23: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Never one to leave anything to chance, Larch introduced his Secret Society friend Stephan to Juniper, who was instantly smitten. While he was friends with Juniper, Larch knew that she'd been warned to avoid his conflicts with Cypress, and having another friend in Stephan inside the Prettacy could only work to his advantage.

Page 24: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Finally tired of beating up Enemy Kevin, Larch fed him to Brunhilde before graduating, taking the cowplant and her cargo of sweet, delicious Enemy Kevin with him.

Page 25: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Cypress, ever the Eeevil Knowledge Sim, used the Bone Phone Larch left behind to make a zombie out of Enemy Kevin. Shortly after the zombification of Enemy Kevin, the Bone Phone mysteriously disappeared as the rest of Gen 2 headed back to Riverblossom Hills.

Page 26: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Larch wasted no time in getting married to Christy and starting a family. Christy's miserable pregnancy was explained when she had twins, Zinnia and Delphinium, much to Larch's delight.

Page 27: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Family Sim Larch took to parenting like a fish takes to swimming, spending every moment he could with his kids--when he wasn't stalking Christy with a romantic interaction in his queue.

He often referred to Zee and Finn as his "childrinions," given their nice points of one and two, respectively.

Page 28: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Juniper married Stephan, the same guy Larch had introduced her to, and they tried to start a family almost immediately, but met with little success. By the time Juniper became pregnant, Isaac's lifebar was short, and he died a few short hours before the birth of his grandson.

Page 29: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Said grandson is Jonquil, nerdy neat-freak with five nice points; practically a saint in the Vetinari family.

Jonny is the first to reveal the true effect of Calista's nose. As for Jonny's grandmother, she was alive to meet both Jonquil and his younger brother, the playful and mean Geranium.

Page 30: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

At the Prettacy, Jonquil (left) and Geranium (right) got along well despite their differences--while they were both neat and active, shy Gerry never understood Jonny's need to finger-gun, and compulsively neat Jonny had a fit every time he saw playful Gerry jumping on the furniture.

Both boys sport what has come to be known as Stabby Death Nose.

Page 31: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

At a party shortly before Orson's death, Cypress first lit into his father about not being considered for the heirship, and then made what Larch perceived as a threat towards Zinnia. Larch erupted, warning Cypress to stay away from his children and threatening him with Brunhilde the cowplant should he attempt to harm his family. Cypress, never one to back down, gave it right back to Larch, telling him that Larch would never see Cypress's blow coming.

Time moved on, as it must, and Orson and PseudoBruty met Death Spicoli, who whisked them away to an endless beach with gnarly curls and umbrella drinks galore. And then PseudoBruty made it her mission in death to scare as many people as possible.

Page 32: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Zee very much proved to be Daddy's Little Girl, bonding with Larch over the flaming lady on the food channel.

Larch was somewhat dismayed by both of the twins rolling Romance when they hit Teen, as that Aspiration does not always lend itself towards Legacy living. Seeing that further steps were needed, he continued to plot.

Page 33: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Still considering Larch her boss, Sycamore was only too glad to talk things out with Larch, agreeing to do whatever was necessary to protect the Prettacy from Cypress's plans. Larch assured her that the Uglacy would be taken care of and didn't require her intervention, though he went into no detail about what his safety net for the Uglacy involved.

Page 34: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

As for the spares, Awesome Banyan had an awesome wedding to Awesome Drake, her awesome college sweetheart, who thought she was awesome.

Page 35: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Sycamore tied the knot with Malcolm Landgraab, who was only too happy to start a family. Oddly, Family Sim Sycamore never rolled the Want to get married or have a baby (until the last day of her pregnancy), while Fortune Sim Malcolm rolled both.

Page 36: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Not long after the wedding, Sycamore gave birth to the facially-challenged Eddie, who definitely took after his father.

Page 37: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Cypress married his college girlfriend, Jane Stacks, in a shotgun ceremony designed to provide him with a caretaker for the alien baby he was carrying, the result of a deliberate abduction. Prior to the ceremony, he'd revealed to Larch that his ultimate goal was to create his own army of nasty children to help him take down the Legacy, making his marriage to Jane little more than a convenience.

Page 38: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Cassidy was born and promptly ignored by Cypress. Jane and Cassidy bonded immediately, and she doted on the alien baby as if he were her own son. The easygoing Cassidy proved to be a disappointment to Cypress, far too nice to be of any use in Cypress's plans for the Legacy.

When Cassidy became a child, Jane learned that she was pregnant.

Page 39: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Though Jane was excited by the prospect of children, Cypress's reaction was more lukewarm. He finally came clean, admitting to Jane that the only reason he wanted to have children was to use as pawns in his plan to destroy the Legacy. Appalled, Jane threatened to leave and keep her baby safely out of Cypress's clutches, but Cypress in turn threatened to harm Cassidy if Jane tried to run, using her affection for her stepson as leverage.

Page 40: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Jane was alone in the house when she gave birth to twin girls, Delight and Delirium. Realizing that she had a narrow window of opportunity, she made a snap decision to give one of her daughters up, protecting her from Cypress, who'd never know about the second baby.

Page 41: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Jane left Delight, the meaner of the two girls, on Drake and Banyan's doorstep, rightly thinking that the nice couple would be a positive influence on her daughter. Though she regretted having to give up her daughter, she was glad that at least one of her children would live a happy life free of Cypress-induced trauma.

The other twin, Delirium, like Cassidy, was too nice to be of use to Cypress, so, also like Cassidy, she was largely ignored by her obsessed father.

In a last-ditch effort to get a mean child, Cypress did the unthinkable.

Page 42: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

He locked Jane in a room on the third floor of the house with a moldy pizza and waited. After several days, Jane eventually succumbed to illness, and the appearance of the Grim Reaper on the premises brought with it another pregnancy for Cypress.

Delirium and Cassidy, both close to Jane, were devastated when she died, but Cypress was somewhat more elated at the prospect of getting his hands on the fabled power of a Reaper child. Teenage Cassidy, who clearly understood what had happened, tried to fill Jane's role with Delirium, and the two grew close.

Page 43: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

At long last, Cypress had what he wanted--a child every bit as nasty as he was: his Reaper child, Spider Jerusalem, with one nice point and whatever supernatural abilities were conferred by his Grim parentage.

Cypress hoped to twist Spider Jerusalem's loyalties so that he'd do anything to help take down the Legacy, but until his youngest son was old enough to do real damage, he was useless to Cypress. Since he'd murdered his wife to get pregnant, Cypress chose Cassidy to care for Spider, threatening his oldest son with meeting the same fate as his stepmother should he fail.

Page 44: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Despite being a Pleasure Sim, Cassidy doted on his little brother, though he deeply regretted not being able to protect Spider Jerusalem from Cypress's machinations. Cassidy understood what Spider's purpose was, and knew that it would be all too easy for Cypress to bend the equally mean Spider to his will.

While Cassidy's relationship with his brother grew stronger, his relationship with his sister started to fracture. Delirium had figured out why her mother died, and deeply resented Cassidy for paying attention to Spider Jerusalem.

Page 45: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Delirium refused to accept Spider Jerusalem at all, and despite her niceness, took great pleasure in seeing him upset for any reason. When Cassidy attempted to broker peace between his siblings, Delirium would lash out at him, telling him that he didn't understand what it was like to lose a mother, since Jane hadn't really been his, refusing to accept the close relationship between Cassidy and Jane.

Dealing with feuding siblings, caring for Spider, keeping up with his household responsibilities, and trying to mitigate Delirium's hostility began to weigh heavily on Cassidy, who often found himself napping during school and sucking down cup after cup of coffee to stay awake at home.

Page 46: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Delight, or Didi, as she came to be known, was quite happy, a dramatic contrast to the siblings she'd never met and didn't know she had. Drake and Banyan were good parents, and while Didi may have had occasional bouts of surliness, she was rarely overtly mean. If Banyan occasionally saw facial similarities between her foundling daughter, the woman who'd married Cypress, and herself, she wisely kept those thoughts unsaid.

Page 47: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Despite the fact that he was coerced into caring for his brother, Cassidy and Spider Jerusalem became close, Spider viewing Cassidy as a surrogate parent. Intelligent, Spider quickly realized the weight of Cassidy's responsibilities, and did what he could to lessen them, though, as a child, there was little he could do to relieve Cassidy's burdens.

Page 48: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

As a teenager, Delirium could have chosen to take on some of Cassidy's chores, but she was still angry over the perceived trade of her mother's life for Spider Jerusalem's, and refused to lift a finger, choosing to date and get away from the house rather than spend any more time with the family she despised than she had to.

Delirium's prickly nature ran contrary to her personality on paper, but she would not accept what she saw as Cassidy's choice of Spider over her: in her mind, it was tacit approval of Cypress's choice to kill his wife. Her grumpiness was further enhanced by having to fight over boys with Cassidy, who was still struggling to have at least some part of a normal life.

Page 49: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

The weight of his responsibilities took a toll on Cassidy that was both mental and physical. Increasingly stressed, he found himself snapping at Spider, who always forgave his big brother. For his part, Spider understood Cassidy's deteriorating emotional state, but was frustrated by his inability to help.

Page 50: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

On the eve of Spider Jerusalem's birthday, an attempt by Cypress to add even more weight to Cassidy's already-overburdened shoulders culminated in a shouting match between the two. Cassidy, who'd been on the verge for some time, finally snapped, calling Cypress out on his treatment of his family. Cypress again threatened Cassidy's life, and Cassidy stormed out, knowing that if he returned home, it would be the death of him.

Page 51: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

As Cassidy waited for the taxi that would take him to college, Spider begged him to stay, claiming that the only reason he felt safe around Cypress was because he knew that Cassidy was there to protect him. However, perhaps for the first time in his life, Cassidy acted in his own best interests and got in the cab, leaving a sobbing Spider Jerusalem behind with the sister who loathed him and the father who merely ignored him.

Page 52: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Jonquil and Geranium hit Teen, each developing his own sense of self. Jonny was very much an OCD neat freak, who got up in the middle of the night to clean toilets, while Gerry had something of an addiction to Gilbert and Sullivan, and could often be found tub-pirating to "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General."

Page 53: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

A teenage Didi was a frequent visitor to the Prettacy, making friends with Gerry in a somewhat torturous process, given the total number of nice points involved (4), and kept coming back despite Isaac's apparent vendetta against her; she was scared by the Founder's ghost no less than four times.

Page 54: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Didi's twin sister Delirium continued her angry warpath, Cypress's relationship with sorostitute Tiffany fueling her rage. Unable to take it out on her father, she directed it towards Spider Jerusalem instead, still mad at him for Jane's death.

Page 55: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Spider Jerusalem was used to Delirium's scorn and hatred, but Cassidy had always acted as a buffer between them before. Delirium's willingness to pick fights with him, coupled with the raging teenage hormones and his guilt over his role in Cassidy's abrupt departure made it difficult for Spider to keep his anger in check. More than anything, he feared what might happen if he allowed himself to give in to the lure of his nice point, and with each day that passed, it seemed more and more likely that Spider would soon be unable to restrain himself.

Page 56: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Spider Jerusalem found himself coming home from school with his cousins Zee and Finn. Intimidated by everything he'd heard about Larch and knew about his father's identical personality, Spider was understandably reluctant to stay. Finally, Larch managed to convince his nephew that he, unlike Cypress, was a Family Sim, and that he, unlike Cypress, wouldn't hurt a member of his family. More than that, he invited Spider into his home and offered the desperate teenager a place to recharge.

Page 57: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Grateful for even the slightest hint of affection, Spider Jerusalem found himself trusting Larch, opening up to his uncle in a way he hadn't done since Cassidy's flight. Jaded in many ways but naive in others, Spider never stopped to consider Larch's motivations, so blinded was he by the promise of a little spot of normality and something that, while not a perfect family, was close enough for him.

Page 58: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Appalled by the shortness of his lifebar, Larch drank Enemy Kevin to give himself a few more days as an adult, allowing more time to plot against Cypress.

Page 59: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Neither Zee nor Finn was keen to become heir, as it meant marriage (for Finn, at least) and babies (for them both). Though he hated to see either of his children upset, Larch took the longer view and a more broad definition of family, and named Finn his heir, much to the relief of Finn's twin sister.

Page 60: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

At the Prettacy, Juniper's decision was met with equal relief, as she named Jonquil heir. Assured of a lifetime of couch-jumping, Gerry happily let his brother assume the mantle of Gen 3 heir.

The decisions made, the Gen 3 kids hit college. In the case of the cow mascot, this was occasionally literal.

Page 61: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Shameless Romancers Finn and Zee used the college directory like a giant inventory of dates. Finn in particular dated often to keep his Aspiration up so he could Energize for stargazing. Zee was less forceful about going after men, but didn't mind getting walk-bys in the sack.

Page 62: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Cassidy was a frequent visitor to Havelock House, and would generally talk boys with his cousin Zinnia, then spend several days migrating from the keg to the bubble blower to the poker table to the pizza and back, single-handedly draining at least one keg. His behavior raised a few eyebrows, but since he tended to play cards badly after hitting the bubbles, no one said anything.

Page 63: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Pleasure Sim Gerry enjoyed the partying aspects of the Greek House more so than the studying aspect of college, and threw regular toga parties when he wasn't on the bubble blower or playing poker.

Despite his inherent goofiness, Gerry was far from stupid, and soon noticed that the only one in the house who wasn't dating was Jonny: particularly problematic since he was required to marry a pretty girl to bring in Gen 4 of the Prettacy. A conversation between Gerry and his brother set Jonny on the right track.

Page 64: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

While at the park to get a little space from the chaos of living with two Romance Sims and a Pleasure Sim, Jonquil met Jeannie, and a bit of shared nerdiness created an instant connection between them. It wasn't long before Jonny was discovering the wonders of WooHoo for himself, and Gerry was able to breathe a sigh of relief that he wouldn't need to be the heir instead.

Page 65: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Didi, also in college, found love with Nolan Wade, who wasn't fooled--he knew that the pink and the frills were Didi's attempt to camouflage her lack of nice points.

Page 66: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Cassidy, finally free from responsibility and able to live the hedonistic lifestyle he so craved, hopped from bed to Dormie bed, trying to find what he was looking for...

Page 67: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

...but he ultimately found it with Mr. Big, whose money could easily provide Cassidy with everything he wanted and everything he thought he needed--but Cassidy's perception and actual reality were two very different things.

Page 68: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Upon graduation, Jonquil married Jeannie in a fully-attended ceremony marred only by the trash can-kicking Townie, an action that resulted in Jonny, Juniper, and Stephan catching the flu, isolating the pregnant Jeannie from her new family.

Page 69: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

The flu epidemic was short-lived, and Wren came along in short order. Another finger-gunner, he was more congenial than most of his relatives, and shared his father's most distinguishing feature.

Page 70: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

At the Uglacy, Finn had no desire to get married, so his wedding to Rosemarie took place in the front hall and was attended by the dogs. Despite his reluctance, he got no red rings, and did, in fact, spend the rest of the night stalking his newly-minted wife.

Page 71: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

On a trip Downtown with Delirium, Spider ran into Cassidy, who was bar-hopping until he ran out of money. Having not seen each other since Cassidy's hasty exit, Spider was all too glad to talk to his brother, until he learned of Cassidy's relationship with Mr. Big. He accused Cassidy of anesthetizing himself with booze and bubbles, and Cassidy's defensiveness only convinced Spider Jerusalem that Cassidy was not in a good place. Following an offer of dinner, Cassidy went with Spider for food.

Page 72: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

The brothers continued to talk, Spider trying to make Cassidy understand that his relationship with Mr. Big was unhealthy, but they were interrupted by the arrival of the man himself, who pulled Cassidy away with the pretext of getting him presentable for a party.

Page 73: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Desperate to help Cassidy, Spider turned to Larch, the only other person he trusted. He outlined the situation and begged for help, but Larch refused, claiming that Cassidy had to be free to make his own decisions.

Page 74: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Spider Jerusalem finally cracked, admitting both his reliance on Cassidy's influence to keep his anger in check and his powerlessness to help the person he cared about most.

Page 75: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Things were not sailing smoothly at the Prettacy either. Jeannie questioned whether Jonny loved her, citing his inability to articulate his feelings for her, and wondered if getting married after a whirlwind romance was the right thing to do. Jonny found the words to say, reassuring Jeannie that there was no one else for him. Another lullabye followed shortly.

Page 76: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Jeannie took time to make sure that Wren didn't feel pushed aside by the new baby. Life at the Prettacy seemed to be going well until...

Page 77: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

...a tag-team haunting by Isaac and Calista left the pregnant Jeannie dead.

Page 78: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

The grieving Jonquil attempted to comfort the equally distraught Wren, who was virtually inconsolable. After two job searches on the computer a few hours apart, Jonny was able to get a job in Paranormal and acquired the Bone Phone. He wasted no time in resurrecting Jeannie.

Page 79: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Though Jeannie was still pregnant when she was brought back, her worst fears were realized--she and Jonny were no longer married. More than that, their relationship panel showed that they weren't in love, and no amount of flirting was able to restore their hearts.

Page 80: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

At the Uglacy, Rosemarie gave birth to two boys: Kestrel, a nice, mellow kid who looked a lot like his father...

Page 81: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

...and Cormorant, a Scorpio like his daddy but with a delightfully smooshy face that melded the best--or worst, depending on your point of view--of both his parents' features.

Page 82: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Larch, ever the Family Sim, adored his grandkids--even the nice one.

Page 83: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Jeannie gave birth to Raven, a healthy baby girl who showed no outward effects of having been dead for several hours. Raven's parents, however, were still unable to repair their relationship.

Page 84: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

While Jeannie worried about her relationship with Jonquil, Juniper worried about what Cypress would do when she and Larch died. Larch assured her that all was being taken care of, and told her that her twin sister Sycamore would watch over the Prettacy, but Juniper was unconvinced.

Juniper and Stephan died within a few days of each other. Wren was crushed.

Page 85: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

In the days before his death, Larch exhorted Finn to spend more time with his sons, lest they end up following in the paths of Delirium and Cassidy. Finn admitted that he hadn't thought that far ahead, but shrewdly mentioned the relationship between Spider Jerusalem and Larch as falling into that category as well. Larch told Finn to stay out of it, and also left him a cryptic message to pass on to his heir, ad infinitum: "When the time is right, let the rain wash away the sins of the past."

Due to Enemy Kevin, Larch got a few extra days more than Christy. He was devastated when she died.

Page 86: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

A few days after Larch died, Sycamore committed suicide, timing it so that Eddie would be coming home from school and little Malcolm Landgraab V wouldn't be taken by the Social Worker.

Page 87: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

After a frantic call from an hysterical Eddie, Malcolm rushed home to find a pair of crying kids and an urn on the floor. Torn between calming the toddler and trying to comfort Eddie, he tried to console the teenager who'd come home to find his mother dying in the dining room.

Page 88: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Little Mal's grief was easier to assuage; the youngest Landgraab seemed to recover quickly, and though outsiders wondered if Malcolm even missed his wife...

Page 89: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

...he was merely choosing to grieve in private.

Page 90: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Larch's death was also the first sign that Raven was more than she seemed. Now a child, Raven's eyes went dark and she spoke to her mother in an otherworldly voice.

Page 91: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Disturbed by what had happened, Raven tried to mope, but Wren would have none of it, forcing his little sister to see her uniqueness as a gift rather than a curse. He played the big brother role to its hilt, snapping Raven out of her mood and helping her make a snowman.

She wanted it to be a mean snowman. Raven has one nice point.

Page 92: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Banyan resurrected Sycamore with the Bone Phone Larch stole from the Secret Society when they were all back in college. Cypress now believed Sycamore to be dead, and would therefore no longer be looking for her to oppose him. Sycamore gave Banyan strict instructions not to tell anyone she was still alive--including Malcolm and her kids, lest a bit of troublesome gossip get back to Cypress's ears. Larch had left her a job to do, and she intended to do it.

Page 93: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Lonely without his uncle Larch to turn to, Spider attempted to get advice from Cassidy, though he was loath to spend any time in the company of Mr. Big.

Cassidy's advice to his brother was to run, but it was not the answer Spider was looking for.

Page 94: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Upon hearing Cassidy's agitation, Mr. Big interrupted, once again pulling Cassidy away from his brother. Forced to choose between Mr. Big's life of ease and Spider Jerusalem's Cypress-created drama, Cassidy chose Mr. Big, though Spider confronted the manipulative jerk, swearing that someday he'd figure out how to get Cassidy out of his clutches.

Page 95: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Jeannie, despite her lack of bolts or hearts with Jonny, found herself pregnant for a third time. Jonny followed in the footsteps of his grandfather Isaac, and married her in the living room while she was pregnant, with no witnesses but the portraits on the wall. As soon as the wedding kiss was done, the bolts and hearts returned with a vengeance, and all was right with the world.

Jeannie had another boy, Rhea. There are no pictures of him because he bugs me. He looks just like Wren, and has Raven's personality, right down to the one nice point.

Page 96: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Once Rhea became a child, it was heir-choosing time at the Prettacy. As Jonny named Wren the heir...

Page 97: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

...Raven had another episode, announcing that she would be able to protect the family if she were the heir, and suggesting a link between herself and Spider Jerusalem.

Faced with incontrovertible evidence, Jonny took the heirship away from a relieved Wren and awarded it to Raven.

Page 98: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Kestrel and Cormorant, despite Cory's complete willingness to make fun of his brother, were close, and neither one of them wanted to eat the fish that Finn caught and stored in his pants.

Page 99: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

After much deliberation and one glance at the teenage Cory's face, Finn decided to make Cory his heir. Cory's mission, whether he chose to accept it or not, was to stargaze from the night he turned Teen to the night he was 6 days from Elder.

The Gen 3 kids, along with Spider Jerusalem and Delirium, headed out to college.

Page 100: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

College proved a most educational experience. Kestrel learned not to play punching games with his one-nice-point roommates.

Cory dated nonstop to achieve his LTW of 50 First Dates, also hoping to meet an unattractive girl to marry as a backup plan.

Wren changed his Aspiration from Romance to Popularity and joined Raven and Cory in Permaplatness.

Rhea continued to bug me.

Page 101: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Raven, unlike Cory, found a potential spouse for the Prettacy in Ryker Trottier.

Page 102: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Then, during a normal conversation, she gave her vaguest prophecy yet. Before they could even begin to decipher it, Raven noticed Ryker, who was displeased to realize that his girlfriend was not quite what she seemed. He dumped her on the spot.

Page 103: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Kest, Cory, and her brothers let Ryker have it while Raven dealt with the aftermath of the breakup. Though no blows were actually struck, Rhea did unload two days' worth of food poisoning all over Ryker's shoes.

Page 104: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Spider Jerusalem was enjoying college life until his father's girlfriend Tiffany crashed the party. First coming on to him, she later revealed that her purpose was to keep tabs on him for Cypress--a job she'd do with or without Spider Jerusalem's consent.

Realizing that his father would do anything to keep control over him, Spider Jerusalem moped for a while...

Page 105: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

...and then took his anger out on the cow mascot. Several times.

Page 106: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

Cassidy, perhaps sensing Spider Jerusalem's predicament, tried to visit his brother at college, but Mr. Big talked him out of it, making his affection contingent upon Cassidy's doing what Mr. Big wanted him to do. Though everyone else saw through Mr. Big's controlling, manipulative behavior from the start, Cassidy saw only someone who said he loved him. Cassidy again chose his life with Mr. Big, and the rift between himself and Spider continued to widen.

Page 107: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

At Havelock House, Raven got back on the horse after prompting from her brothers, and found Mr. Right in Tom Kearney, who not only accepted her gift of prophecy, but embraced it.

Cory failed to find his own Mrs. Right, though several good possibilities did emerge via his endless string of dates.

Page 108: A Very Vetinari Recap, Part 1

So that's it. The Vetinari Dualegacy, Generations 1 through 4.

Check back in another, eh, four generations or so, and there'll most likely be another!

I love Spider Jerusalem's angryface! Which, considering how often he makes it, is a good thing...