A practical guide to relationship breakdown...relationship breakdown We’ll lead you through...
Transcript of A practical guide to relationship breakdown...relationship breakdown We’ll lead you through...
slatergordon.co.uk
A practical guide to relationship breakdown We’ll lead you through life’s complexities
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Children and separation 3-10
•Carearrangements
•Parentalresponsibility•Goingabroad•Howtotellyourchildrenabout yourseparation•Separationchecklist
Child maintenance 11-12
•Childmaintenance
•Maintenanceoptions
Other financial matters 13-17
•Benefits•Childbenefit•Bankaccounts•Mortgages•Budgets•Counciltaxdiscount•Housingbenefit•Taxcredits•Childtaxcredit •Workingtaxcredit
•Councilhousing
Useful organisations 18-20
•Debtmanagement
•Personalsupport•Childrenandbreakdown
•Counsellingforyou
In the event of a death 21
•Considerationsintheevent of a death
•Guardians
•Changeofname
Dispute resolution 22-23
•Mediation
•Collaborativelaw•Solicitorassistednegotiations
•Courtproceedings
Notes and forms 24-31
•Glossary
•Budgetplanner•Samplelettertoschool
Contact usTheteamcanbeavailableasquicklyasrequired.
Telephone:08081757711 E-mail:[email protected] Website:slatergordon.co.uk/family
Contents
Care arrangements
Researchshowsitisnormallyinachild’sbestinterestif:
• Theyareraisedbybothparents
• Theirparentsdemonstrateapositive relationshiptowardeachother
• Theyareclearaboutthe arrangementsforspendingtime witheachparent
• Theyarenotexposedtosudden changesinarrangements
• Theyarenotexposedto negotiationsorconflicts
• Theydonotheartheirparentstalk negativelyabouttheotherparent
• Theyareabletokeepintouch withwiderfamilymembersand familyfriends
• Theirparents’newpartnerssupport thearrangementsandhaveagood relationshipwiththem
• Theyareallowedtoenjoytheirtime witheachparent.
What are the options?
Intoday’ssociety,noonefamilyisthesameandtherefore,whatworksforonefamilymaynotworkforanother.Whenyouseparate,youmaydecidetosharethecareofthechildrenonadailyorweeklybasis,oroneofyoumayhavetheday-to-daycare,with theotherhavingregularcontact.
Youmaywanttohaveacombinationofbothdirectfacetofacecontact andindirectcontactviatelephone, inwritingorovertheinternet.
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No two cases are the same. We will treat your circumstances
with empathy and compassion.
Childrenand separation
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Considerinvitingyourpartnerto meetyouataneutralvenuewhereyoubothfeelcomfortableorinapublicsetting,suchasacoffeeshop,todiscussthearrangements.
Thesearesomeofthearrangementsthatyoumaywanttothinkabout anddiscuss:
•Howwillthechildren’stimebe sharedbetweenyou?Thisworks bestifthereisapatternorroutine.
•Wherewillthehandovertakeplace? Ideallyitshouldbefromyour homes,butcouldbeviaathirdparty orinapublicplace.
•Whowillberesponsiblefor thecollectionandreturnofthe children?
•Whowillbedoinghomework, washingoranyotheractivities?
•Whatisgoingtohappenonspecial occasionssuchasbirthdaysand festiveholidays?
•Howwillarrangementsdifferover schoolholidays?
•Howwillyoutellthemaboutthe arrangementsthatarebeingmade forthem?Willyoutellthem togetherorseparately?
•Arethearrangementsflexible?
•Willyousetaminimumtimeperiod fornotificationofanychanges?
•Willtherebeadditionalcontact bytelephone,textoremailand ifso,when?
•Willtherebeanyoneelselooking afterthechildren?Ifso,whowill thisbe?
•Aretheretobeanyimportantrules thatyouconsideressentialforthe children?Forexample,setbedtimes, whenandhowtheirhomeworkis done,andcurfews?
•Whenandhowwillanewpartnerbe introducedtothechildren?
•Whatisthepositiononschool reportsandletters?
•Whatisthepositionregarding medicaltreatmentforthechildren?
•Willyouattendparents’evenings andotherschooleventstogether, separatelyoralternatively?
•Howwillyouapproachchoosingthe schoolforyourchildren?
•Arethereanyschoolrelatedissues thatwillneedtobeconsidered together?Howmuchinputwilleach ofyouhaveregardingGCSEoptions andfundingofschooltrips?
•Whatarethearrangementsforyour children’soutofschoolactivities, sportorhobbies?
Where do you start?
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What is Parental Responsibility?
ParentalResponsibility(PR)isdefinedbySection3oftheChildrenAct1989as,“Alltherights,duties,powers,responsibilitiesandauthority,whichbylawaparenthasinrelationtothechildandtheadministrationofhisorherproperty.”
InsimpletermsapersonwithPRisresponsibleforthecareandwellbeingofachild.Thelawdoesnotlistwhattheseduties,powersandrightsare,butexamplesinclude:
• Consenttomedicaltreatment
• Arrangingachild’seducation
• Agreeingtoachild’schangeofname
• Administeringachild’sproperty
• Representingachildinlegal proceedings
• Determiningthecultureand religionofachild
• Agreeingtoachild’sadoption
• Agreeingtoandprohibitingthe issue of a child’s passport
Do I have Parental Responsibility?
Mothers
• HaveautomaticPRfromwhenthechildisborn
Fathers
Thepositionwithfatherscanvary.FatherswillhavePRif:
• Theyareorhavebeenmarriedto themotheratanytimesincethe birthofthechild
• Theyareregisteredjointlywith thechild’smotheronthebirth certificate,providingitisafter 1stDecember2003
• Theyhaveacquireditbyformal legalagreementwiththemother orbyCourtOrder
Why do I need Parental Responsibility?
PRisneededifyouwishtohavesomesayinthedecisionsregardingchoosingyourchild’sschool,religionandsurname.Itallowsyoutoconsenttomedicaltreatmentforyourchild.Italsoallowsyoutoappointaguardianonyourdeath,andalsopermitsyou tosignconsentformsforschooltrips.
Parental Responsibility
Parental Responsibility is needed if you wish to have some say in the
decisions regarding your child.
Children between 3-8 years
What is the legal position with regard to going abroad and children?
UnlesstheCourtgivespermission, theconsentofallthosewithPRisrequiredbeforeachildistakenoutoftheUK,nomatterhowshortthetripmaybe.ThepositionishoweverdifferentwhenthereisaChildArrangementsOrderinplaceunderwhichitisstatedthechildliveswitheitherorbothparents,orifaSpecialGuardianshipOrderisinforce.IntheseinstancesthepersoninwhosefavourtheorderismademayremovethechildfromtheUKforuptoonemonthinthecaseofaChildArrangementsOrderandthreemonthsinthecaseofaSpecialGuardianshipOrder,withouttheconsentofanyotherpersonwithParentalResponsibilityorthepermissionoftheCourt.
How do we tell our children of the changing circumstances?
Separationanddivorceforchildrenisundoubtedlyanupsetting,stressfulandunsettlingtime.Alotofissuesmayhavebeendiscussedbetweenyoubothandthethoughtoftellingyourchildrenmaybequitedaunting.Itmaybeusefultousebooksorstoriestohelpyoungchildrenunderstandwhatisgoingonbetweentheirparents.
Childrenneedtohearaboutissuesinaclearmannertowhichtheycanrelate.Belowisalistofbooksthatmaybehelpful,accordingtothechild’sage.
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AstoryaboutAlexwhonowhas twohomes:oneatmummy’sand oneatdaddy’s.Recommendedforchildrenofaveryyoungage.
Two Homesby Claire MasurelISBN:0744589258
Acartoonstripstoryexplaining aboutseparationanddivorceforyoungchildren.
Dinosaur Divorce: a guide for changing familiesbyLaurenand MarcBrownISBN:0316109967
Going abroad
Dealingwiththe change in circumstances
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Abookthatlooksatdivorcefromthechild’sangleandoffersanopportunitytoexploreandexpressthechild’sownfeelingsoftheirsituation.
Children Don’t Divorce by Rosemary Stones ISBN:0851228119
Tellsthestoryofdivorceinatypicalfamilyfromthepointofviewofanengagingyoungnarrator.Readerslearnaboutdivorce,andreceiveage-appropriateexplanationsofwhatishappeningregardingsuchissuesassingle-parenthomesandjointcustody.
Was it the Chocolate Pudding? A Story for Little Kids about Divorce
Abookabouttwosiblingswho worrythattheirparentsarguingistheirfault.Theycallameetingat theirschooltofindoutifanyone elseisinthesamepredicament. Theyfindoutthey’renotalone.
Two of Everything by Babette Cole ISBN:9780099220626
Asensitivebooktoinspireand supportchildrenthroughthedifficultyofparentseparationanddivorce.
Jack by Helen Bishop ISBN:0957108885
Older children/Young people
TheauthortellsthestoryofAndy whoisupsetaboutherparents’divorceanddoesnotknowwho sheshouldlivewith.
The Suitcase Kid by Jacqueline Wilson ISBN:0440863112
Thisbookdiscussesmanyofthe topicsthattroublechildrenwhen theirparents’divorce.
The Divorce Helpbook for Kids by Cynthia MacGregor ISBN:1886230390
Describedasacompleteguideforparentswhoareseparated,divorcedorlivingapartwhowishtocreate twocompleteandhappyhomesfortheirchildren.
Mom’s House, Dad’s House by Isolina Ricci ISBN:9780684830780
bySandraLevinsISBN:9781591473091
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It’s Not Your Fault
Averyhelpfulwebsiteemphasisingtochildrenthatseparationand/ordivorceisnotaproblemcausedbythem,butisanadultissue.Ithasadiarytoolthatencourageschildrentokeepaccountoftheirfeelingsandemotionstohelpthemcompareincomingmonths,forexample,whethertheyarehappierthattheirparentshavestoppedarguing.
www.itsnotyourfault.org
ChildLine
Offersafreeconfidentialhelpline open24hours.
Freephone: 0800 1111 www.childline.org.uk
National Youth Advocacy Service
NYASprovideadvocacyservices forchildrenandyoungpeopleup totheageof25.Theyprovidespecialisthelpinchildren’srights,childrenincare,contactissues,educationandyouthjustice. Theyhaveanetworkofadvocatesthroughoutthecountryandtheir ownlegaladvice.
Freephone: 0808 808 1001 www.nyas.net
Youth Access
YouthAccessmembersarededicatedtoprovidinghigh-quality,youngpeople-centredservices.
www.youthaccess.org.uk
There are also some handy websites that you may wish to let your children have a look at, particularly if they are older.
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Who to tell about the change in your circumstances
nYourfamilyandfriendswhocanhelpandsupportyou
Asaresultofyourrelationshipbreakingdowntherearelikelytobesomechangestoyourcurrentlivingarrangements.Thismeansthereareanumberofpeopleandorganisationsyou may feel it’s appropriate to contact.Youshouldtakelegaladvicebeforecontactinginstitutionssuch asyourmortgagelenderorbank.
Your money
Youshouldconsidertelling:
nYourlandlordormortgagelender
nYourlocalauthoritycounciltaxdepartment
nYourbankorbuildingsociety
nAnycreditorsyouhave(suchascompanieswithwhichyouhaveacreditcardorapersonalloan)
nTheTaxCreditsofficeifyouneedtoapplyforTaxCreditsforthefirsttimeorifyouarealreadyreceivingTaxCredits
nJobcentrePlusifeitheryouor yourex-partnerisgettingbenefits
nYour local authority if they pay youHousingBenefit
nThedisabilityandcarersserviceifyouarereceivingAttendanceAllowanceorDisabilityLivingAllowance.
Your work
Youshouldtell:
nYouremployer.Theonlythingsyouspecificallyneedtotellyouremployerareyouraddressandyournextofkindetails,iftheyarechanging.However,itmayhelptoletyouremployerknowaboutthechangesinyourpersonalsituationsothattheyareawareyouaregoingthroughadifficulttimeandcanmakeallowancesforthis.
Your home
Youshouldtell:
nUtilitycompaniesincludingwater,gas,electricityandtelephone (butonlyifthepersonnamedonthebillwillnolongerberesponsibleforpayingorifyou aresettingupanewhome)
nYourinsurancecompanyifyouwishtochangethebeneficiaryorthoseentitledunderthepolicy
nThePostOfficeifyouneedtoredirect your mail
nThedriverandvehiclelicensingagency(DVLA)ifyouneedtochangeyouraddressdetailsonyourdrivinglicenceorvehicleregistrationdocuments
nTVLicensingifyouneedto changetheaddressdetailson yourtelevisionlicence
Separation Checklist
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nThepassportserviceifyouneedtochangeyournameandaddressonyourpassport.Itishoweverpreferabletodelaychanging yournameuntiltheconclusion oftheproceedings.
Your children
Youshouldtell:
nYourchildren’sschools.Theonlythingyouspecificallyneedtotellyourchildren’sschoolsareyouraddressandyournextofkin detailsiftheyarechanging.However,itmayhelptoletyourchildren’steachersknowthat yoursituationathomeischanging,becausesometimeschildren’sbehaviouratschoolcanbe affectedwhentheirparents’relationshipbreaksup.Alotofschoolshaveapolicyonhowtodealwiththissituationsoitis worthcontactingthemtofind out.Youwillalsoneedtocheck thatlettersandreportswillbe sentouttoyouseparately. A sample letter to the school isprovidedonpage30. Youcanalsodownloadthisat:slatergordon.co.uk/rb
Your health
Youshouldtell:
nYourdoctoranddentistto changeyournextofkinand addressdetails(ifyou’removingoutofyourcurrenthome).
Inarelationshipyourfinancesarehighlylikelytohavebeenpooledtogether.Onseparationyouwillneedtoconsiderhowyourchangeincircumstanceswillaffecthowyoueachcontributetothewellbeingofyourchildren.
Forexample:
•Whatregularpaymentsareeither ofyoumakingforthechildren’s maintenance,andifso,towhomare thepaymentsmade?
•Whowillpayforclothesandshoes forthechildren?
•Whowillpayforuniforms,sports equipmentandkit,etc.?
•Whowillpayfortravel,forexample toseeeachofyou,relativesand friends?
•Whowillpayforschooltrips?
•Whowillgivethechildrenpocket money?
•Whowillpayforlargeitems,such asbicycles,computers,musical instruments?
• Howwillyousupportthechildren throughcollege,universityor othertrainingcourses?
• Howandwhenwillyoureview thesefinancialarrangements?
What are the maintenance options?
Parentshavethreeoptionsinrespectofchildmaintenance.Theycaneitherenterintoaprivateagreement (calledafamilybasedagreement)whichisnotlegallybinding,orrecordanagreementinaformaldocumentwhichislegallybindingbywayofaCourtOrder.Alternatively,ifachildiseitherunder16orunder20andinfulltimeeducation(butnothigherthanA-Levelorequivalent)andparentscannotagreetheamountofmaintenancebetweenthemselvestheycanapplyforanassessmentbythechildmaintenanceservice(CMS).Thechildmaintenanceservicedistinguishesbetweentheparent whodoesn’thaveday-to-daycare ofthechild(the‘payingparent’) andtheparentorpersonwhodoes(the‘receivingparent’).
Anapplicationcannotbemadeto theCMSifthereceivingparentor thechildlivesoutsidetheUK.
Thechildmaintenanceliability willbecalculatedonthebasisof apercentageofthepayingparent’sgrossweeklyincomeafterdeductionofpensionpayments.Reductionswillapplydependingonthenumberofnightsthechildstaysovernightwiththepayingparent.Areductionwillalsoapplyifthepayingparenthasrelevantotherchildreneitherlivingwiththem,orforwhomtheyhave topaychildmaintenance.
Child maintenance
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Forfurtherinformationonthevariousoptionsyoucanvisitthechildmaintenanceoptionsserviceonline at www.cmoptions.orgorcontact byphone0800 988 0988.
Forinformationontheassessmentprocessbythechildmaintenanceservice,pleasevisitwww.gov.uk/child-maintenanceorcontacttheirhelplineon0845 713 3133.
Thelevelofchildsupportpayablecanbecalculatedonlineusingthechildmaintenancecalculatoratwww.gov.uk/calculate-your-child-maintenance.
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Aseparationcandramaticallyaffectyourpersonalfinancesandassets.Thissectionaimstoprovideyouwithinformationonthefinancialsupportthatmaybeavailabletoyouoryourfamily,andhighlightssomeofthefinancialissuesyoumayneedtodiscuss.
Benefits
Asaresultofyourseparationyoumaybecomeentitledtocertainstatebenefitsoradditionalbenefits.Benefitsyoumaybeeligibleforcaninclude:
• IncomeSupport
• JobSeekersAllowance
• ChildBenefit(seefurther informationbelow)
• TaxCredits(seefurtherinformation below)
• HousingBenefit(seefurther informationbelow)
• CouncilTaxdiscounts(seefurther informationbelow)
• DisabilityLivingAllowance
• StatePension
• PensionCredit
• EmploymentSupport
• Allowance
• CarersAllowance
Pleasenotethatanumberof thebenefitslistedabovewillbeaffectedbytheintroductionofUniversalCredit.Further informationisavailableat www.gov.uk/universal-credit.
Tofindoutwhichbenefitsyou maybeentitledtoyoucanvisityour LocalBenefitAgencyoryoucanobtainanestimateofyourbenefitentitlementandapplyonlineat: www.gov.uk/browse/benefits.
Child Benefit
ChildBenefitisatax-freepaymentthatyoucanclaimforyourchild.Itisusuallypaideveryfourweeksbutcansometimesbepaidweekly.Thereareseparateratespayableforeachchild.ChildBenefitpaymentsusuallystopwhenyourchildreaches16,unlesstheyareineducationortrainingthatcountsforChildBenefit.Forexample,anadvancedcourseathighereducationlevelsuchasadegreedoesnotcount.YoucannotgetChildBenefitforyourchildoncetheyreachtheageof20.
Whoever is paid Child Benefit is assumed to be the primary carer. Therefore, it is important to ascertain who is to be the primary carer of the child as this may affect other financial benefits and support as well as contact and residence arrangements. If you and another person both claim Child Benefit for the same child, only one of you can get it.
Other financial matters
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For further information on Child Benefit and how to go about changing the arrangements, visit the HR Revenue and Customs website at:
www.gov.uk/browse/benefits/child
Orbytelephoneon:0300 200 3100
MondaytoFriday8amto8pm.Saturday8amto4pm.ClosedSundays.
Orbypostto:
Child Benefit Office,PO Box 1Newcastle Upon TyneNE88 1AA
Bank accounts
Ifyouhaveajointaccountwithyourspouseorpartneryoumaywishtoinformyourbankofyourseparation.Youshouldfirstcheckthebank’spolicyondealingwithaccountsintheeventofdivorceorseparation.Youmayconfirmtothebankyouragreementtoclosetheaccountortotransferitintooneofyoursolenames.Mostbankshaveaspecificformforthispurpose.Mostbankswillnotagreetoanychangesiftheaccount isoverdrawn.
Ifyoudecidetokeeptheaccountopenuntilyouhavefinalisedyoursettlement,thenitisagoodideatolimittheoverdraftfacilityorwithdrawitfromtheaccountalltogether.
Forjointsavingsaccountsorjointaccountswithlargebalances,youandyourpartnershouldagreehowthose
balanceswillbedealtwith.Youmayagreetofreezetheaccountordividethemoneybetweenyou.
Mortgages
Onseparation,inevitablyasecondhomeneedstobefundedandasaresultthemortgagepaymentsonthepropertyyousharedtogethercanbecomedifficulttomeet.Therearehowevertemporaryandlongtermstepsthatyoucantaketomaketherepaymentsmoreaffordable.
Theseinclude:
• Contactingyourmortgage companytorequestamortgage repaymentbreak.Youwillboth needtoconsenttothis
• Ifyouarecurrentlyonarepayment mortgage(repayingbothinterest andcapitaleachmonth)youmay beabletoconvertthemortgageto interestonly.Youwillbothneed toconsenttothis.Itwilldepend upontheaccount’stermsand conditions
• Youcanconsiderre-mortgaging toachieveabetterrateofinterest orchangingthemortgageinto oneofyoursolenames.Wewould stronglyrecommendthatyou consultamortgageadvisorand takelegaladvicebeforetaking stepsinrelationtochanging themortgage.
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By living in separate houses, one or both of you may become entitled
to benefits such as tax credits.
Budgets
Youfirstneedtoascertainyourjointhouseholdincomefromallsources.Fromemploymentthiswillincludesalary,bonusorovertimepayments.Youalsoneedtotakeintoaccountinvestmentincome(suchasinterestanddividends)togetherwithbenefitstowhichyouareentitled.Bylivinginseparatehouses,oneorbothofyoumaybecomeentitledtobenefitssuchastaxcredits.
Youwillalsoneedtoconsiderhowthepaymentswillbemade.For
exampleyoumayagreeaone-offmonthlypaymentpayablebystandingorder,oryoumayagreetoremainresponsibleforcertainitemsofmonthlyexpenditure.themoneybetweenyou.
Council Tax discounts
Ifyou’reonalowincomeyoumayqualifyforCouncilTaxreduction.YourfullCouncilTaxbillisbasedon atleasttwoadultslivinginahome.
Ifonlyoneadultlivesinahome (astheirmainhome),theCouncil Taxisreducedby25percent.Certainpeoplearenotcountedwhenworkingoutthenumberofadultswholive inyourhome.
Forexample,discountedpersonsinclude:
• Childrenunder18
• Peopleonapprenticeschemes
• 18and19-year-oldsinfulltime education
• Full-timecollegeanduniversity students
• Youngpeopleunder25whoget fundingfromtheSkillsFunding AgencyorYoungPeople’s LearningAgency
• Studentnurses
• Foreignlanguageassistants registeredwiththeBritishCouncil
• Peoplewithaseveremental disability
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• Live-incarerswholookafter someonewhoisn’ttheirpartner, spouse or child
• Diplomats
Housing Benefit
LocalauthoritiesoffersupporttothoseonalowincomeandpayHousingBenefittothosewhoqualify,toassistinthepaymentofrent.
InordertoqualifyforHousingBenefit,youmust:
• Bepayingrent
Youmustnot:
• Havesavingsofover£16,000
• Liveinthehomeofacloserelative
• Beafull-timestudent(subject toexceptions)
• Beanasylumseekerorbesponsored tobeintheUK
• ByresidingintheUKasaEuropean EconomicAreajobseeker
Ifyouarecurrentlyreceivingbenefits,HousingBenefitwillcoverallofyoureligiblerent.
Ifyouarenotcurrentlyreceivingbenefits,HousingBenefitmaycoverallorpartofyourrent.
ForfurtherinformationoneligibilitycontactyourLocalAuthorityorcheckyoureligibilityandapplyonline:www.gov.uk/council-housing/apply-for-a-council-home.
Tax Credits
Ifyouareresponsibleforatleastone childoryoungperson,youmayqualifyforChildTaxCredit.Ifyouwork,butareonalowincome,youmayqualifyforWorkingTaxCredit.YoucanoftengetbothtypesofTaxCredits.IfyouwerealreadyreceivingTaxCreditsbeforeyourseparation,youwillneedtonotifytheInlandRevenueofyourchangeincircumstanceandtheywillreassessyourclaim.
Child Tax Credit
Ifyouhaveanewbabyoryou’reresponsibleforanychildrenundertheageof16orunder20infull-timeeducationorapprovedtraining,thenyoumaybeabletoclaimChildTaxCredittohelpwiththecostoflookingafterthem.
Working Tax Credit
• Ifyouareresponsibleforchildren, youneedtobeaged16oroverand dopaidworkofatleast16hoursa weektoqualify
• Ifyouarenotresponsiblefor children,youneedtoworkthe followinghours:
• Ifyouareaged25orover,youneed todopaidworkofatleast30hours aweek
• Ifyouhaveadisabilityandare16or over,youneedtodopaidworkofat least16hoursaweek
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• Ifyouoryourpartnerareaged50 orover,andaregoingbacktowork immediatelyafterbeingonout-of- workbenefits,suchasIncome SupportorJobseeker’sAllowance, youneedtodopaidworkofatleast 16hoursaweek
• Ifyouoryourpartnerareaged60 orover,youneedtodopaidwork ofatleast16hoursaweek
Furtherinformationisavailableat:www.gov.uk/browse/benefits/tax-creditsandanonlinecalculatorisavailableat:www.gov.uk/tax-credits-calculator.
AlternativelyyoucancontacttheTaxCreditsHelplineon0345 300 3900 orinwritingtoTaxCreditOffice,Preston,PR14AT.
TaxCreditsarebeingphasedoutandgraduallyreplacedbyUniversalCredit.UniversalCreditwillbepaidasasinglemonthlypaymentthatwillincludeastandardallowanceplusadditionalallowancesforelementsincludingchildren,housingandcaringresponsibilities.UniversalCreditisbeingintroducedinstages,sowhetheryoucanclaimdependsonwhereyouliveandyourpersonalcircumstances.UntilyouareaskedtomakeaclaimforUniversalCredit,youcancontinuetoclaimTaxCredits.
Council housing
Councilhousingispropertythatisownedbyacouncilandnotbyaprivateindividualorcompany.Anyonecanapplyforcouncilhousingbuthomesarenormallyofferedtothepeoplewhoneedthemmost.Councilsuse‘points’or‘banding’systemstoworkouttheorderinwhichhousing isofferedtopeople.
Councilsdifferinhowtheyrunhousing.Somecouncilsmayhavetransferredalltheirpropertiestolocalhousingassociations.Somehousingassociationsalsorunthewaitinglistonbehalfofthecouncil.
Housingassociationsareseparatefrom,butoftenworkcloselywithcouncilstohouselocalpeople. Youcanoftenapplydirectlytoahousingassociationaswellasyourcouncil.Insomeareas,youmay onlydealwithahousingassociationwhenyouapplyforhousing.
Forfurtherinformationor anapplicationformcontact yourlocalcouncilorvisit: www.gov.uk/housing-benefit
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Youmayhaveexistingdebtsorfindthatasaresultofyourseparationyouarerelyingoncredittosupplementyourincome.Youshouldgetindependentadvicetohelpyoufindthebestwaytodealwithyourdebt.YoucangetfreeandindependentadvicefromorganisationssuchasCitizensAdviceandtheNationalDebtline.
Belowisalistoftheorganisationsofferingfreehelpandadvice.
Debt Advice FoundationAregisteredUKcharity,operatingfreetelephonehelplineforanyoneworriedaboutdebt.
0800 043 4050 MondaytoFriday9amto9pm,Saturday9.30amto1pm
www.debtadvicefoundation.org
National DebtlineOfferfree,confidentialandindependenthelpoverthephoneforpeopleinEngland,ScotlandandWales.Youcancalltheirhelpline andalsodownloadpublications fromtheirwebsite.
0808 808 4000 MondaytoFriday8amto8pm
www.nationaldebtline.org
Stepchange
Providefreeandconfidentialcounsellingondebtproblems-includingpersonalbudgetingandcreditadvice.
0800 1381 111 MondaytoFriday9amto6.30pm
www.stepchange.org
Civil Legal Advice
IfyouqualifyforlegalaidandliveinEnglandorWales,CLAcanprovidefreehelporlegaladviceoverthephone.Theycanhelpwithdebt,housing,employment,education,welfarebenefitsandTaxCredits.
0345 3454 345 MondaytoFriday8amto9pm,Saturday9amto3pm
Payplan
ProvidefreeadvicetopeoplelivingintheUKondebtandbudgeting,includingfreedebtmanagementplansandIndividualVoluntaryArrangementswithoutupfrontfees.
0800 280 2816 MondaytoFriday9amto5pm
www.payplan.com
Useful organisations
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Business Debtline
Provideafreetelephonedebtcounsellingserviceforthe self-employedandsmallbusinessesfacingfinancialhardship.
0800 197 6026 MondaytoFriday9amto5pm
www.businessdebtline.org
Your Local Authority
Someofferafreedebtcounsellingservice.YoucancheckwithyourLocalAuthoritybyfollowingthelinkbelow.
You’llbeaskedtoenterdetailsofwhereyouliveandthentakentoyourLocalAuthoritywebsitewhereyoucanfindoutmore.
www.tinyurl.com/3rmfmr5
AdviceUK
IsanetworkofindependentadvicecentresforpeoplelivinginEngland,ScotlandandWales.Tofindyournearestmemberagency,visittheAdviceUKwebsiteortelephone:
0300 777 0107 www.adviceuk.org.uk
NorthernIreland: www.adviceni.net/advice
Money Advice
Providesathoroughandhelpfulguideonfinancialissuesandthepracticalitiesyoumayexperiencewhengoingthroughadivorceandseparation.Theirserviceincludesanonlinedivorceandseparationbudgetcalculatorandotherusefulinformation,includinghelpwithdebt.
Helpline:
0300 500 5000
www.moneyadviceservice.org.uk
Law Centres
Ifyou’rebeingthreatenedwithlegalaction,andyouqualifyforlegalaid,youcangetfreeandindependentadvicefromyourLocalLawCentre.
FindyourLocalLawCentre: www.lawcentres.org.uk
ScottishAssociationofLawCentres: www.govanlc.com/salc
Shelter
Offersfreeconfidentialadviceonhousing,debt,welfarebenefits,careandhealthneeds(includingdisabilityrightsandentitlements).
England: 0808 800 4444
Wales: 0845 075 5005
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Arelationshipbreakdowncanbeverystressfulandemotional.Counsellingorotherformsoftherapycanhoweverhelpyouadjusttolifeafterseparation.Thefollowingorganisationsandbookscanoffersupportandinformationonparentingafterseparation.
Family LivesThisisanationalcharitydedicatedtoofferinghelpandinformationforparentsandfamiliesinarangeof circumstances.
24hourhelpline: 0808 800 2222
www.familylives.org.uk
Gingerbread
Provideaprofessionalfreephoneadviceserviceforloneparentfamilies,membershipservices,andanetworkofself-helpgroups.Thewebsiteincludesavirtualgroupforloneparentfamilies.
Helpline:0808 802 0925
www.gingerbread.org.uk
Relate
LocalRelatecentresofferrelationshipcounsellingandlife-skillscourses. Thenationalofficecanputyouintouchwithlocalcentres.Counsellingisalsoavailableoverthetelephone forasmallfee.
Helpline:0300 100 1234
www.relate.org.uk
Counselling for you
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Considerations in the event of death
Why should I make a Will?
IfyoudonothaveavalidWillyouhavenosayinwhathappensafteryourdeath,includingwhatyourpreferredfuneralarrangementswouldbe andwhathappenstoyourestate. IfyoudiewithouthavingmadeavalidWill,yourestateisdealtwithbytheAdministrationofEstatesAct1925whichsetsoutwhocandealwithyourestateandwhowillinheritwhat. If you are still legally married (evenifyouareseparated)andyouhavenoWillthenyourspousewillinheritfromyourestate.
What is a Guardian and do I need to appoint one?
AGuardianissomeonewhoyouhaveselectedtolookafteryourchildrenincaseyoudiewhiletheyarestillundertheageof18.However,onlyaparentwithParentalResponsibilitycanactuallyappointaGuardian.
How do I appoint a Guardian?
Mostcommonly,thiscanbeappointedinyourWill,oryoucouldputitmoreinformallyonpaper,solongasitissignedanddated.
TheeffectofGuardianshipwilltakeimmediateeffectuponthedeathoftheparentwhohasmadetheappointment,exceptwherethereisasurvivingparentwithParentalResponsibility.
Change of name
Youcancallyourselfwhateveryoulikebycommonusage.However,ifyouwanttoofficiallychangeyournameyouwillhavetopresentlegaldocumentationtotherelevantagencies.
Ifyouaredivorcedorhavebeenthroughadissolution,yourDecreeAbsoluteorFinalOrderwillbesufficient.Inothercasesyouwill needachangeofnamedeed.
Children and changing their names
EveryonewithParentalResponsibilityforachildwillneedtogivetheirconsent.ForadefinitionofParentalResponsibilityandalistofwhomayhaveit,pleaseseetheChildren’ssectionofthisguide.IfyoudonotobtaintheconsentofallthosewithParentalResponsibilitytheycanstartlegalproceedingstostopthechangeofnameorobtainanOrdertomakeyouchangeitback.
Intheevent of a death
Change of name
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Youmaybeabletoagreearrangementsforthechildrenand/orafinancialsettlementwithyourpartnerorspousewithoutneedinganyprofessionalsupport.However,evenifthisisthecasewewouldstronglyrecommendthatyouenterintoalegaldocumenttoensurethatwhatyouhaveagreedislegallybinding.
You must secure a court order as this istheonlywayinwhichyoucanhaveafinalandbindinglegalagreementinrespectoffinancialmatters.Thecourtordernotonlysetsoutthetermsoftheagreement,butmoreimportantlyitistheonlywayinwhichfinancialclaimscanbeformallydismissed.
What are the options if you cannot reach your own agreement?MediationMediationistheprocessbywhichyouandyourpartnerorspousemeettogetherwithatrainedindependentthirdpartycalledamediator.Themediatorwillfacilitatediscussionsbetweenyoutoencourageyoutoreachagreementsaboutarrangementsforthechildren,financesandproperty.Theroleofthemediatoristohelpyoucooperate,resolveconflictsandhelpyoureachjointdecisions.Mediationisnotreconciliationorcounselling.
Itissensibleforyoutoreceivelegaladvicealongsidethemediationprocesstoensurethatyouarewellinformedaboutyourlegal
position.Themediatorisimpartialandthereforecannotgiveyouindependentadvice.Thesessionsusuallylastoneandhalfhourseachandcanbearrangedtosuityourrequirements.Thenumberofsessionswilldependontheissuesthatneedtoberesolvedbetweenyou.
Arbitration
Arbitrationcanbestbedescribedasprivatecourtproceedings.Youandyourpartnerorspousewillagreewhowillactasthearbitratorandyouwillpayfortheirservices.Arbitratorsareexperiencedfamilylawyersorjudges.Byengaginginthearbitrationprocess,youagreetobeboundbythearbitrator’sdecision.
Arbitrationcanbeafastandeffectivewayofdealingwithfinancialclaims.
Collaborative Law
Collaborativelawistheprocessbywhichyouandyourpartnerorspousestillmeettogether,however,youeachretainyourownspeciallytrainedlawyerwhoisalsopresentduringthemeetings.Youdecidetheagendaandthepaceatwhichthemeetingsprogress.Collaborativelawisparticularlyworthconsideringifyouarelikelytohaveanongoingrelationshipwithoneanother,whetherbecauseyouhavechildrentogetherorfriendsincommon.
Dispute resolution
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Solicitor Assisted Negotiations
Ifyoudonotwanttomeetfacetoface,negotiationscanstilltakeplacebetweenyouviaasolicitor.Thisremainsthemostcommonmethodthroughwhichfinancialterms areagreed.
Court Proceedings
Notallcasesaresuitableformediationorthecollaborativelawprocess.Agreementsmayalsonotbereacheddespiteattemptsatnegotiations.Althoughanapplicationmaybemadetothecourt,thecourtprocessstill
offerstheopportunitytoresolvematters.Onlythosecaseswhereagreementscannotbereachedwillbelistedforafinalhearingandafterhearingevidencefromthepartiesajudgewilldecidetheappropriateordertomake.
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Glossary
• Affidavit
Aformal,writtenstatementsworntobetrue,morecommonlyknownasaswornstatement.
• Applicant
Thepersonapplyingtothecourt foranorder.
• Application for Divorce
Documentfiledwiththecourttostarttheprocesstolegallyendamarriage,traditionallyknownas apetition.
• Application for a Financial Order
Applicationtothecourtinthecourseofadivorceordissolutionforafinancialorder(e.g.maintenance,lumpsum,transferofproperty).
• Arbitration
Privateproceedingsinwhichacouplepayforanarbitratorandagreetobeboundbytheirdecision.
• Assets
Anydescriptionofpropertyor rightsotherthanlandoran interestinland.
• CAFCASS (Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service)
Theorganisationresponsibleforsafeguardingandpromotingthewelfareofchildreninvolvedinfamilycourtcases.
• Child Maintenance Service (CMS)
TheCMSisthegoverningbodywhichdealswiththeissueofchildmaintenanceincludingthelevel tobepaid.
• Clean Break
Thistermisusedwhenahusbandandwifesettletheirfinancesonthebasisthatneitherwillbeabletomakeanyfurtherclaimsagainst theother.
Ahusbandandwifecandismiss theirclaimsagainsteachother’sincomes(claimsformaintenance),capital(includesassetsandpensions)andagainsteachother’sestatesondeath.
• Civil Partnership
Samesexcouplesagedover16canregistertheirrelationshipasacivilpartnership.Thisthengivesthemthe same legal rights as married couples.
• Collaborative Law
Awayofreachingagreementswiththepartiesandtheirsolicitorsmeetingtogethertodiscuss theissues.
• Conditional Order
Anorderconfirmingentitlementtotheendofacivilpartnership.
• Consent Order
Anordermadebythecourtwiththeagreementoftheparties.
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• Contact
Organisedtimethattheparentwhodoesnotlivewiththechildrenhaswiththeirchildren.Contactcantakeplaceinavarietyofforms,suchasemail,texts,phonecallsorletters,aswellasovernightstaysandvisits.
• Decree Absolute
Thefinalorderofthecourttoconfirmthelegalendingofamarriage.Thisistheseconddecreepronouncedonadivorce.
• Decree Nisi
Anorderofthecourttoconfirmthatthepartiesareentitledtoadivorce.Thisisthefirstdecreepronouncedonadivorce.
• Dissolution
Whereacivilpartnershipisbroughttoanend(equivalenttoadivorce).
• Domicile
Thecountrywhereapersonhas hisorherpermanenthome,orclosestconnection.Thiscanbeeitheradomicileoforigin,oradomicileofchoice.
• Application to the Court made without notifying the other Person
Applicationwithoutnotice.
• Final Order
Anorderlegallyendingacivilpartnership.Canalsomeananorderdealingwithafinancialsettlementinadivorceorseparation.
• Form E
Financialstatementusedincourtproceedingsusedtoprovidedisclosure.
• Former Matrimonial Home
Theaddressatwhichamarriedcouplelastlivedtogetherashusbandandwife.
• Injunction
Anemergencycourtorder.Canbeanordertoprotectapersonfromdomesticviolenceortofreezeassetswithinfinancialproceedings.
• Judicial Separation
Anorderthatthepartieswillbelivingseparatelybutdoesnotendthemarriage.
• Maintenance/Periodical Payments
Aregularsumofmoneypaidfromonepartytotheother,usuallyon amonthlybasis
• Maintenance Pending Suit
Temporarymaintenanceforaspouse,pendingdecreeabsolute ofdivorce.
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• Mediation
Attendanceatameetingwithaprofessionallyqualifiedmediatorwhohelpspartiesreachanagreementregardingchildrenand/orfinances.
• Non-Resident Parent
Theparentwhodoesnothavethechildlivingwiththem.
• Parental Responsibility
Thisistherights,dutiesandresponsibilitiesthataparenthasinrelationtoachild.
• Pension Sharing
Anorderconfirmingthepercentagesplitofapensionbetweenpartiesonadivorceordissolution.
• Petitioner
Apersonwhostartsdivorceproceedings.Nowknownasapplicant.
• Pre-nuptial Agreement
Anagreemententeredintobeforemarriagewhichsetsoutthefinancialarrangementsintheeventofthemarriagebreakingdown.
• Post-nuptial Agreement
Thesameasapre-nuptialagreement,butenteredintoafter amarriage.
• Prohibited Steps Order
Anorderpreventingaparentfromtakingacertainstepinrelationto achild(forexampleremovalfromthecountry).
• Residence
Agreementororderofthecourtconfirmingwithwhomachild willlive.
• Respondent
Thepersonanapplicationismadeagainst.
• Separation Agreement
Adocumentsettingoutthetermsofaseparationinrelationtofinancialmattersandorchildren.
• Without Prejudice
Ifadocumentoraconversationisdescribedasbeing‘withoutprejudice’itmeansthatitcan’t bequotedincourt,orshownto ajudge.
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Budget planner
Item Current Monthly Expenditure
Future Estimated Monthly Expenditure
PROPERTY
Mortgage
Rent
BuildingsInsurance
ContentsInsurance
CouncilTax
HouseMaintenance
LifeInsurance-Endowment
LifeInsurance–Other
Replacementfurniture/furnishings/electricalequipment
Householddecorating
UTILITIES
Gas
Electricity
Water
Oil
BoilerService
TelevisionLicence
Sky/Cable
Telephone(Landline)
Telephone(Mobile)
InternetAccess
HOUSEHOLD EXPENSES
Food(household)
Food(atwork)
Windowcleaner
Gardener
Cleaner
Vetbills
Petinsurance
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Item Current Monthly Expenditure
Future Estimated Monthly Expenditure
CHILDREN
Carinsurance
CarTax
Petrol/diesel
MOTandservicing
Breakdownservices
Depreciation
Taxi/bus/trainFare
Parking
LOANS
Loans
Finance/HPAgreements
Car(Finance)
CreditCards
StoreCards
PERSONAL
Clothing/shoes
Hairdresser
Beautician
Toiletries
Opticians
Dentist
Prescriptions
PrivateHealthInsurance
DryCleaning
Pensions
29
Item Current Monthly Expenditure
Future Estimated Monthly Expenditure
LEISURE
Holidays
Weekendbreaks
Christmaspresents
Birthdaypresents
Eatingout/socialising
Entertainment (e.g.,theatre,cinema)
Gymmembership
Hobbies/clubs
Newspapers/magazines
Books/CDs/DVDs/downloads
LEGAL FEES
OTHER ITEMS
SUB TOTAL A £ £
CHILDREN
Childmaintenance(ifnotresidentparent)
Schooluniform
Schoolfees
Schooltrips
Schooldinnermoney
Schooltravel
Clothing
Shoes
Pocketmoney
Childcarecosts
Babysitters
Holidays
Clubsandhobbies
OtherItems
SUB TOTAL B £ £
GRAND TOTAL A + B £ £
30
[NameofHeadteacher]
[AddressofSchool]
[Date]
Dear[nameofheadteacher],
Wearewritingtoinformyouofthearrangementsthatwehavemadeforourchildren[insertnamesofyourchildrenhere]followingourseparation. Weverymuchhopeyouwillassistinmakingthesearrangementswork.
[Children’snames] willlivewith[nameofparentandthelivingarrangementsintermsofhomeaddresses].
[Children’snames] willbecollectedby
•Xon[statewhichdays] •Yon[statewhichdays]
[Stateifthereisanyflexibilityinthisarrangementandifthereareanyotheradultse.g.grandparents,whomaycollectthechildrenfromschool].
Wehavealsoagreedthat[namesofchildren]will...[insertanyrelevantinformationaboutanyreligious,personal,social,health,sexandrelationshipseducationthatyouwishtoinformtheschoolabout].
Pleasewouldyouensurethatinformationabout[namesofchildren’s] progress andschoolornurseryeventsaresentto...[specifyhowandtowhom].
Inanemergencypleasecontact...[providehome,workandmobilephonenumbers].
ForinformationpleasenotethatthefollowingpeoplehaveParentalResponsibility:[insertwhohasParentalResponsibility].
Signed [Bothyournames]
Youcandownloadthisatslatergordon.co.uk/rb
Sampleletterto your child’s school
Notes
31
SlaterandGordonLawyersUK (LLP)isoneoftheUK’sleading andlargestlegalpracticeswith officesthroughoutEngland, WalesandScotland.
For more details please contact:
T 0808 175 7711 E [email protected] W slatergordon.co.uk/family
Slater andGordon (UK) LLP is authorised and regulated bytheSolicitorsRegulationAuthorityandtheFinancialConductAuthority for insurance mediation activity. The informationin this brochure was correct at the time of going to press inNovember2015.