Chapter 11 – Family Values

Welcome back everyone to the long-anticipated 11th chapter of A Piratical Legacy. It's been a bit longer than usual since my last update, mostly due to the fact that my husband was in a show and we've been quite busy what with his rehearsals and the actual performances and stuff. But now we're back on track. The Direct Family Tree thus far: Jack Buccaneer, Sr. - The (dead) founder; possesses stuffed animals now, and wanders amongst all his descendants Elise Buccaneer - Jack's wife, also deceased

Mary Buccaneer - The family matriarch, pictured above; a retired pirate Alan Buccaneer - Mary's husband and father of gen. 3, pictured above; retired Captain Hero Ivy Buccaneer - Generation three heiress; Galactic Overlord Queen of the Cosmos; Bad luck with concubines Pao Buccaneer - Ivy's third husband after the previous two died tragic and entirely avoidable deaths Bartholomew Buccaneer - Son of Ivy and Cale Kosmokos Roche Buccaneer - Son of Ivy and Pao

Ivy ushered in the first snowy day of winter by getting promoted to Professional Party Guest and thus perma-platness. She then moved into the Adventurer career path. "We promised Grandpa Jack that we would do our part in carrying on the family Pirate tradition." Good for you. Now what's your new lifetime want? "We wish to audition 20 concubines." Good luck with that.

"Mommy, who's my real father?" "Why do you ask, Bart, dear?" "I have to do a family tree, mommy. For school!" "Well, in that case you should put down that the Royal Harem is your father, dear." "Who's Royal Harem? Can I meet him?" "Perhaps when you are older and we think you are ready, Bart. Besides, don't you think of Pao as your father?" "Well, yeah, but I know he's not my real father."

Speaking of the Royal Harem... Anthony Greaves was still lingering about in the graveyard plotting his revenge. He'd thought that as Chief Concubine he'd be the sole recipient of Ivy's affections, and once he was disabused of that notion he became dramatically unhinged. "My snowminions and I will destroy this royal lineage! Destroy it!"

"Nice suit, Jack." "The only think it lacks, Pao my dear brother, is a man-purse." "It does have quite the nifty pocket chain, though." "You make a good point, Pao. So listen, I would like to make you a proposition of a business nature. And yet it must remain strictly confidential as my father cannot find out about it." "Go ahead, Jack. I'm all ears."

It's Roche's birthday! The entire family is of course in attendance, including Captain Jack, who is scaring the living daylights out of Bart just off camera. You can just see Jack if you look closely at Mary. "Aaaaaah!" "Arr... is me dad usin' me as a springboard fer scarin' Bart again, goddess?" It looks that way, Mary. "Oy! Daddy! Stop doin' that, aye? You don't want ta be scarin' the potential future leader o' the family, savvy?" "Mary, sweets, how's the boy going to develop real guts if 'e never 'as to face down a ghostie or two, aye?"

Okay all you Pao detractors, now is the time to hush. Roche is the most adorable toddler ever and thus will have many gratuitous pictures in this chapter. And don't you think the random hair looks adorable on him? "Arrrr!" A little pirate in the making!

"Oooooh!" And vocal for someone who hasn't learned to talk yet. "Actually, we think he is trying to spell his name, goddess." "Seeeeeeeee!"

Elise made her first visit from beyond the grave during the same party and had fun scaring the living daylights out of everyone. This is the best picture I got of her, though. Note the rotting bottle on the floor behind her? "Auntie Celeste, who is my father?" "We are afraid that we Know nothing, see, Of your paternity. Sorry."

"Awk! So what brings you 'ere, Snowy?" "Oh, the usual. Destruction of the royal family on behalf of a scorned lover. You?" "Awk! Just rounding up campaign contribution to support Jack's political candidate. Awk!" "A life of crime. How... enthralling, Linus." "Pay isn't -awk!- half bad either, if you ask me!"

"Jack, me boy, ye know there's such a thing as birth control, aye?" "Meadow wants a big family." "Just because ye were deprived o' the woohoo during college doesn't mean you have to give in though, savvy?" "Listen, grandfather, I have been running my own criminal empire since I was a toddler, and I do not think I need your unsolicited advice about how to run my family, see?" "OOGA BOOGA!" "I wish you would be kind enough to refrain from doing that, grandfather." "Not so tough now, are ye, Jack?"

Mary has taken on gardening as her primary occupation. She has a gold gardening badge, which means she finds the whole thing pretty easy. Although why she needs to talk to the plants about such all-encompassing topics as the world is somewhat beyond me.

... are you okay, Anthony? "S-so cold." I can see that. You're blue and shivering. And why are you in your underwear?" "C-c-clothes fell apart."

Roche's personality is a bit different from his older brother's. He's neat (7), outgoing (10), active (7), serious (3), and nice (8). Looks like there won't be any tub pirates this generation unless Mary encourage some into him. "Gonna be a nice piwate, gwampa!" "Oh? Don't you want to take over the search for the Pearl Bandit from your grandfather, little one?" "Nope! Piwate!" "As long as you don't break any laws, okay?" "Pwivateer!" "That's my grandson!"

Ahh... Pao must be at work. "Mmph! Ted, we would like to audition you for a place in our Harem." "Wow! It's my greatest dream come true! Can I be Chief Concubine?" "Until we figure out what has caused our recent spate of bad luck, we regret that the position of Chief Concubine must remain empty." "Well, that's okay, highness. I'll move in when you're ready for me." "IF we reinstate the position, you mean." "Yeah, that too."

"Brr. Sure is cold today, isn't it." "You got that right, Shannon. Seems like in our younger days it was never as cold as it is these days." "You have a very good point there, Alan. I reckon I can't remember a colder winter." "Fact is, this is the first winter I remember where the pond's frozen over, Shannon." "It's a mighty shame, Alan, and that's what I say. There's nothin' better than fishing in the winter." Ah, Sims. How quickly they adjust.

"C-curse you Ivy! Curse you for breaking my heart! And curse your family! Curse you all!!!!! ... I can't move."

What are you staring at? Your great leader seems to be passed out in the snow, Mr. Snowy. Because Ivy has struck him down, he will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. I get ghosts. They're not so bad. Worse than that, goddess. This family is pretty bad trouble... I fail to see how a Sim popsicle and a demented snowman can be any serious threat to my Legacy...

"OKAY, THIS IS STARTING TO GET RIDICULOUS." He dug his own grave, sir. "EVEN SO. TRY TO KEEP THE BODY COUNT DOWN FOR THE REST OF THE CHAPTER. I WOULD VERY MUCH APPRECIATE NOT HAVING TO INTERRUPT MY BUSY SCHEDULE." I'll see what I can do. "THANK YOU." What are you so busy about, anyway? "ER... SNOWBALL FIGHT WITH ALBERT AND BINKY."

"I'm kind of feeling a grave disturbance in the force, Highness." "The crypt is around back, and is perfectly secure, Ted. We don't like to rush things, but our husband will be home in two hours and we still haven't auditioned you..." "Oh, right."

By the time Pao got home, Ted was long gone and Ivy was enjoying the warm afterglow that comes after all successful auditions. Pao, did you know there's a plumbbob on your coat? "I'm not exactly blind, goddess. It's my squadron identifier. Fifth Golden Plumbbob Division?" Right.

Nadine Fitzhugh, current matriarch of the Fitzhugh Legacy written by smoothiequeen87. What are brings you to Ivy's clothing boutique on this brisk winter day? "Oh, nothing much. Just seeing if my brother Rhys or my daughter Allegra are about. Oh, and checking to see what Ivy has stocked in the way of winter clothing." That outfit looks rather fetching on you. It brings out the colour of your hair. "Why thank you, goddess!"

Gage, no matter how long you stare at the changing booth, nobody's going to invite you in. Especially after all the grilled cheese sandwiches you've been eating lately. "It's Don's cooking, honestly. Maybe I should just move in with Marina and the kid after all... how is the Gage-man supposed to charm the ladies if he can't keep himself in top physical condition?" Gage... you're talking to yourself in the third person again.

"Sorry." Mind telling the readers where you're from? *sigh* "Again? Geez, this is getting ridiculous. Anyway, I'm Gage Uglacy... famous creation of Candi... Uglacy... Prettacy... Bachelor challenge... werewolf... yadda yadda yadda..." Yeah, that'll do.

"So listen, highness, I've been reading this article about the fine pearls Pirate Island is getting known for and I'd like to invest." "We aren't really connected with the counterfeit pearl trade, Kyle. We think you should talk to our brother Jack." "Right, but you can get me an introduction, right?" "We aren't a networking service. You must make an appointment at the Lord High Executioner's Office."

"Um, I'll pass on that." Allegra Fitzhugh looks somewhat amused at the conversation she's overhearing. "Well, it's just that I can't believe everyone is making such a big fuss over counterfeit pearls." "We think they are shiny." "...right."

Hrm... it's after hours... Ivy's locked in a clinch with a college friend of hers... must be audition time again! "We can't remember your name, but we have a convenient photo booth around the corner." "Wow... this is such an honour, Queen Ivy! I've been looking forward to this since the day I met you." "We find that vaguely disturbing, though flattering as well. Enough talk. Audition!"

Well, it must have gone well if you're keeping a picture as a memento, Ivy. "All of our harem members get to have a picture with us. It's how we let them know they've been accepted. If they visit us in our palace and don't see their picture on the wall then they know they need to audition again and don't yet hold all the rights and privileges of a full harem member." And those rights and privileges are...? "We only disclose that information to full harem members." Uh-huh. I bet you just haven't thought of any yet. "Why don't you join our harem and find out?" Ehh... I'll pass.

Despite the hair, this is NOT Other-Alan. I think his name is Toby something.

Another acceptance. Yawn. These aren't nearly as interesting as Jack Sr.'s serial dating sprees.

Geez, Ivy. Again? Your husband's going to wonder at the long hours you're putting in at the store... especially since you haven't actually opened it in three days!

Moving on... nothing to see here.

What? You actually decided to open the store for once? "We opened at midnight. For some reason our vassals on this island really like late night shopping. It's a bit of a mystery to us. Anyway, could you leave us alone? We're trying to make a sale." It looks like you're discussing Jack's merchandise, not store goods. "Zoey Legacina is quite interested in what we have to offer."

"Wow, mommy, you're finally home! I never see you anymore!" "We have been very busy with our store. You know we use it as our Royal Court as well, right?" "Yeah. Hey, can I come with you sometime? Can I sit on your throne?" "Perhaps when you're older, Bart." "Why does everyone say that to me about everything, mom? I'm pretty big already. Hey, does my father ever come into your store?"

"Many members of the Royal Harem visit us at the store, Bart." "Well yeah, but which one is my father?" "In essence, dearling, they are all your father. We don't really think of our harem as being made up of individuals." "I don't know why you won't just tell me! I'm going to find out eventually!" "Yes dear."

"Daddy, why won't mommy tell me who my real father is?" "I don't know, Bart. Maybe she doesn't want you to be sad? I think your father is one of your mother's first husbands, either Count Stuart or Professor Blake. I've never seen pictures of either of them so I don't know who you look like the most." "I don't know if you're right about that, daddy. But if you don't know and mommy won't say, then how can I find out?" "Normally I wouldn't suggest going against your mother's wishes, Bart, but I think everyone deserves to know who their parents are.

Maybe you should get in touch with the goddess? She'll definitely know." Aww... Pao, why'd you have to bring me into this? I'm trying to maintain a policy of strict non-interference here. *sniff* "You mean you know and you won't tell me, goddess?" Aww... listen, kiddo, if you think you figure it out and ask me I'll tell you if you're right or wrong, okay? "I guess."

"Grandma, do you know if my real father is dead? Daddy thinks that my father was either Count Stuart or Professor Blake." "Well, Bart, to be honest I've always wondered about that myself. I know it wasn't Professor Blake because your mother was pregnant long before they got married, and he didn't move to the island from Paris until right before the wedding. But... I think you were born a little too early to be Count Stuart's son, too." "So my father isn't dead?"

"Well now, Bart, I didn't say that. Your mother, seeing as how she fancies herself a queen and all, has been rather prolific with her ... romantic encounters, as it were." "What's that mean, grandma?" "I'll... tell you when you're older, okay Bart?" "Geez! Everyone keeps saying that to me!"

"Well, at least we be certain of who yer father is, aye, Roche?" "Daddy!" "Nay, I be yer grandma, aye?" "Gwamma!" "And what do ye want te be when ye grow up then, Roche?" "Piwate!" "That's me boy."

And here we see the little toddler pirate, glowing with radioactive ooze, about to play in the snow. Aww... so cute. "Adowable piwate!" ... and a bit vain, it seems. "If ya cute like me, ya gotta know it, lady." Ahem. That'd be 'goddess' to you, little tyke.

"Yummy! White stuff yummy!" Hee! Seriously... toddler ... eat snow... cute! *dies of cuteness overload*

"Jack, I'm so glad you could stop by." "Any time, brother. Any time. The family is always willing to drop whatever it happens to be doing to assist a family member who is in need." "Well, I'm not in need exactly, Jack. I've been thinking over that proposition you made the other week, and well..." "I am all ears, Pao. Do go on. Please." "That price you quoted me was too good to pass up. I'll procure as many of those MRE's as you could possible want in exchange for the

counterfeit necklaces. I know Ivy can sell the necklaces at considerable profit." "That is very true, since you are essentially getting them for free. And the corporation can always use more basic military supplies. It is true that we mostly deal in more esoteric commodities, such as counterfeit pearls and Egyptian cotton, but we are willing to deal in just about everything and the best part is, everybody has a share." "Although the ironing board scheme kind of fell through, didn't it?" "We shall say no more about that, brother dear."

Business concluded, Jack and Pao decided to spend the rest of the afternoon pelting each other with snowballs. In their raincoats. Ehh... whatever floats yer boats, guys, but those don't look particularly warm...

"Daddy, I got a 'C-' on my paper because Professor Butters didn't believe me that my father is the Royal Harem. But that's what mommy told me to put!" "Well, I'll just call up your teacher and set things straight, okay Bart?" "Thanks daddy. You're the best!" "I'm glad the harem isn't still around. At least your brother will grow up fairly well-adjusted." "What was that, daddy?"

"Ohhh... nothing." "Anyway, Professor really liked the rest of my paper so that's why I didn't fail." "That's good. You certainly do have quite the large family tree, anyway..." "Bigger than anyone else on the island! Well, except for my cousins..." Speaking of cousins and family and such... let's pay a visit to the rest of the family!

Across the street from the Legacy Manor, it's a certain little somebody's birthday. Elisabeth, Mary's sister, married Shannon right out of university and they settled across the street from Legacy Manor. As you already know, Shannon and Alan are the best of friends ever since they roamed the streets of the island fighting crime. Anyway, Elisabeth and Shannon had one child, Antoinette, though everyone just calls her Toni. Toni married Publius Numantius, a Roman chap from Blite27's Ten Caesars Legacy. And this is their firstborn child, Hadrian.

"Gwampa, a beah in da living woom?" "Well, Hadrian, it's become a bit of a family tradition among the Buccaneer family offshoots. Every household must have a Commodore Bear so that Captain Jack can come visit them." "Who dat?" "Captain Jack is your great-grandfather. He was the first member of your family to move to this island." "Pway wif Com'dowe Beah?" "You know, that might not be the best idea, Hadrian." "Wanna pway wif beah! Beah!"

Since the Toyonaga branch of the family tree only lived across the street, it wasn't unusual for the Buccaneers to stop by for dinner or, as in this case, dessert. Although... Toni... you better not be eating any of that cheesecake! "Hmm? Whas dib oo shay?" Gah! Both because you're eating the cheesecake and because you're talking with your mouth full! Gross! "Auntie Toni, do you know who my father is?" "Sorry, kid. If I ever knew I probably forgot. Too much time with the bubble blower."

Shannon and Elisabeth are still like a couple of teenagers when they don't think anyone is looking. I heart them muchly. "G'way, goddess. I'm romancing my wife." Fine, I'll leave you two alone.

"I'm having a baby! CAN SOMEBODY BRING ME SOME BUBBLES?!?" That bad, huh? "You have no idea. Eeeeeee!"

Aww... Meet baby boy Cestus Toyonaga.

And meet other baby boy, Benjamin Toyonaga. "Cheesecake! That's my girl! I hope I get a lot more grandbabies!" "Well, I like to woohoo with Publius so you might, daddy." "Just give me the grandchildren, honey. I don't need the details." "Will you change the diapers?" "Sometimes?" Heh. Family sims are cute. And that's what Shannon is. Not sure if I mentioned that before.

And before long it's time for a birthday since my updates on the rest of the Buccaneer family are basically limited to births and birthdays (with the occasional wedding thrown in for good measure). In attendance we have: Alan Mary The Toyonagas (Shannon, Publius Numantius, Toni, Elisabeth, and baby Hadrian) and Aerdrene, my friend's simself The twins are sleeping upstairs.

"Ow! My spleen!" Hooray for birthday cake glitches! "Gee, now that Hadrian's growing up I wonder when he'll get married..." I think you're a bit early on that thought, Shannon. "It's never to early to think about one's family's welfare!"

And of course a second birthday follows close on the heels of the first. In attendance (L-R) we have: Tosha, Toni, Publius, Celeste, Elisabeth (behind Shannon), Shannon, Hadrian, Ivy, and Eddie.

First up: Cestus! "Come to grandpa! Nice clothes! They look a little familiar..." "Dad, he's wearing Hadrian's hand-me-downs." "Ah, that explains it." "Embrace singularity, Not conformity, In a large family Out of necessity."

And next up is Benjamin! "Gee, he's cute Publius ... now all he needs is a few tiger stripes to complete the shaggy look. I'm thinking orange tiger genetics, rather than white." "Tosha, he's a kid. Please leave him out of your mad scientist ponderings and experiments." "Sorry, Publius. It's just gotten to be a habit."

"Can you believe this is the first winter I've ever just laid down in the snow and made snow angels, goddess?" Uhh... actually, I can, Shannon.

Not long after Hadrian grew up, Bart stopped by to visit. The second cousins didn't really get along well at first but once they started playing chess things got a little better. "Why do you like chess so much, Bart?" "Well, my investigations haven't turned up any sign of who my father might be, Hadrian. I'm hoping that if I brush up on my logic and strategererery I might have more luck." "Isn't Uncle Pao your daddy?"

"Well yes, but he's not my father. You know?" "Um, okay. Hey, wanna snowball fight?" "I guess. I just wish I could figure out who my father is." "Well, why don't you get Hercules to ask his mom?" "Who's Hercules?"

"Oh, he's just the goddess's son..." Aww... I've always been fond of this interaction. Isn't it adorable when sim kids cuddle with their parents?

Speaking of Sim kids, I should mention that sim me had another one... in the greenhouse of all places. Meet Artemis. I'm sure she'll show up again, probably to steal little Legacy boy hearts. But that's obviously off in her future.

Of course, after giving birth I had to head out shopping to pick up some new duds. Red doesn't really match the purple/grey skintone very well.

Ah... much better. Thanks to my husband for colouring the purple pirate suit for me. Really. It's purple. Not pink. Honest!

Professor Butters stopped by for a visit not long after the first snowfall and we exchanged a few words. "Listen, Purple, I'll stop failing your kid when you find Flavius for me!" Geez, PB, I'm trying! You know you've been to practically every single community lot on the island looking for Flavius? "Well... yeah..." Well then?

Following his cousin Hadrian's advice, Bart soon befriended Hercules at school and came home on the schoolbus with him. "Gee, Herc, I'm glad your mom said you could come home with me today." "Me too! I've always wanted to visit a deity. What's it like? Do you get to hurl thunderbolts?" "Eh, being a deity isn't really anything special, Herc. I don't have any special powers or anything."

Bart looked as though he didn't quite believe his friend. "But your mom controls the whole Legacy and the destiny of my entire family!" "I don't know much about that, Bart." "Well anything you can tell me about what is going to happen to me in the future would be really cool, but I want to be your friend even if you don't do that. Want to play catch?" "Sure!"

A little later, Alan stopped by to chat with me. "Listen, goddess, the rest of the family and I aren't really sure what to do about young Bart. He's pretty driven by the whole 'finding out who his father is' thing. Mary and I would just tell him but we don't even know." I'm sorry, Alan. I wish I could tell you, but it's something that Bart is going to have to discover on his own, you know? "Mary, Pao and I just don't want him to be consumed by this whole thing. He's still just a little kid." *sigh* I know. Listen, I can't help him directly but maybe I can give him a few nudges in the right direction.

But that would have to wait because it was time for a birthday party! It was Artemis' birthday but I told Hercules he could invite a friend or two over as well. Of course, he invited over Elphaba. Gage insisted on tagging along as well. "Hey, she slept over at my place last night and I don't get to see her as often as I like." Gage? Paternal feelings? "Nah... but hanging around with my kid makes the female Simselves think I'm sensitive and stuff. Hey, is Toast going to be at the party?" Gage... Gage... some things never change...

"Hey 'Faba." "Hey Herc." "I like your shirt. It's pretty cool." "It has a rainbow on it! And I like pink." "I remember - your room is all pink and stuff. Hey, want to see my room?" "Sure!"

While the terrific twosome were off inspecting Hercules' toys, simHubby got ready to spin Artemis into terrible two-dom.

Aww... curly hair! Just like simMe and real me! Everyone must now coo at Artemis for a full minute.

The party wound down into a grand old time as Artemis proved to be fairly undemanding in her first few hours of toddlerhood. I found myself cornered by Gage. "So, do you think Toast likes me, goddess?" For Marina's sake (and Elphaba's, and Toast's), I endeavored to change the subject by asking Gage what he thought of Seasons. "I can't wait til summer. Do you think Toast will look good in a bikini?"

Meanwhile, Ben (Blite27) got into a conversation with Kyle (PikaKyle). "Kyle, I've got a great proposition for you. If you find a valuable commodity to trade for the three crates of counterfeit pearls I got from Jack last week, then not only will you make a handsome profit on the sales of the pearls, you'll also become a valued member of the corporation. And the corporation looks out for its own." "Are you sure Jack can be trusted?" "Of course not, but I know a good deal when I see one!"

The party wound down and all the guests left. I put Artemis to bed and wandered out into the living room to read a bit before bed. I wasn't surprised to find Hercules painting, although I did point out it was almost time for bed. "Just five more minutes, mom. I'm almost done my painting of Elphaba!" Aww...

The next night, I was entertaining a few guests and happened to let slip to them that I'd kind of enjoyed my recent mini-break from Legacy writing. Ivy just shrugged it off but I could almost see the lightbulb going on over Hercules' head. He dashed for the phone right away. "Hi Mrs. Buccaneer. Fine. Fine. Thank you. Yes ma'am. Could I please speak to Bart, ma'am?" Such a polite little man.

Then Bart snuck off to my computer when he thought I wasn't looking. Now, he's not allowed on the internet yet being a pretty young kid and all, but he's good with computers all the same. It only took him a couple of minutes to find my word file with all my Legacy notes. Well... a partial file, that is. Hercules dashed back to the phone. "Hi Mr. Buccaneer. This is Hercules. Thank you. Fine. I'll be sure to mention that to her. Could I please speak to Bart again?" A few minutes of silence as Hercules presumably waited for Bart to come to the phone. "Hi Bart! I found something! I'm not allowed to use the internet but I saw this link in one of my mom's files to a place called www.boolprop.com. I think that's where all the Simselves go. Maybe you can get more information from them? Great! Okay, I'll see you in school tomorrow. Bye!"

Meanwhile, I continued entertaining my guests. Ben had mentioned an interest in getting to know Ivy since she's so gorgeous and all, and I was happy to oblige. I invited them over for leftover birthday cake and introduced them. "We are always happy to meet another denizen of our realm, Ben. We are curious, though... what rank is a Simself in relation to us?" I think they're about equivalent to minor nobility. "Yes, that makes sense to us since they always seem to have plenty of money are are much better dressed than the serfs and peasants."

Unfortunately, the rest of the meeting didn't go quite so well. Both Ivy and Ben alternated between hot and cold reactions to each other and I was worried that they would walk away from the evening with a negative relationship score so I ended the impromptu party a bit early. "It was nice meeting you, Ben, and we hope to run into you again." "Likewise," Ben echoed. And that was that.

A turkey, Tosha? "Tigers have big appetites. Especially Eddie."

Don't let the turkey burn! "Owwwww! Roooooooooar!" I guess you kind of have other things on your mind.

And it's a boy! Simba, to be precise. Although I notice that he also is lacking the custom skintones. "Yes, the tiger genes obviously need further manipulation before they're properly encoded for human DNA. Eddie and I are eager for the kids to be a bit older so we can get to work. In the meantime we're doing a LOT of reading."

Of course, time passed at Eddie and Tosha's house as it must in all homes on the island (eventually) and it was time for a birthday - specifically, for firstborn Nala. Guests in attendance (L-R): Eddie, Tosha (with Nala), Jack, Ivy, and ... Flavius Marius.

Nala turned out pretty sweet, but there are more important considerations at this party. "Hey! It's my party!"

Eddie was happy to do the honours. Professor Butters, meet Flavius Marius. Flavius, meet PB.

Nala, meanwhile, was having a friendly chat with Allegra Fitzhugh. "I guess we're both kind of special, huh? I mean, you're Death's daughter and my parents are tigers, right?" "That's right, kid." "But my cousins' dad is an alien from another planet, and that's just weird, not special or anything." Such a winsome child.

Another birthday, this one for Simba. No party this time, though, since the only reason there was a party last time was because Eddie is friends with both Flavius and PB. ... onto the next house. I promise I'll get back to the Legacy family before the end of the chapter, though. I just feel it's important to get to know all the spares and their kids because I love playing them all. "Look, if you're leaving then leave, okay? I need to run the standard battery of tests on Simba anyway to make sure he doesn't have the tiger DNA at all before I start trying to synthesize it for him..."

Arriving at the Thayer household just in time to find Meadow in labour. Is anybody really surprised? It seems she's perpetually pregnant, after all. *Huff**Huff* "Just shut up and give me a hand, will ya? Jack's sleeping." Gee, nice husband there. "Hey! He was up all niiiiiiiiiiight! Ow! For work I mean!" *pant*

It looks like Jack was eventually persuaded to wake up, though. This is April, a girl obviously.

And this is baby boy Aspen. Yes, Meadow had natural twins. "I love that my wife is so interested in being a mother, for it means that my children will always be well cared for. As well, I shall endeavor to instill in them an aptitude for business ventures, whether 'legitimate' or not, because the family and the corporation have dealings on both sides of the law, capisce?" It's nice to see that you're planning for the future, Jack.

Meadow, being family-minded, frequently had the rest of the family over for dinner. Just ... ignore the ten-day-old congealed plate like the guests are. Raising babies doesn't leave a lot of time for cleaning especially when one's husband works full time. "Visitors from space Stole Other-Alan from our place And so his kids have a face That looks squashed by a mace And is green, at the base, As they're the alien race." "Kind of like that plate, huh? Y'know, it takes a long time for cheese to spoil..." And yes, Marla is still as obsessed with cheese as ever. As is Anne, who is just barely visible behind Meadow.

And of course the reason everyone is here is because it's Autumn's birthday. "That is part of the reason, it is true, but the other reason is because I have just received a new shipment of Egyptian cotton and these friends and family are all here to bid on it." Did you pay duties on the cotton when you imported it? "Why would I do a strange thing like that, goddess? No, I simply agreed to do an unspecified favour for my sister and she had her Harem take care of it."

And Autumn looks like... can't tell in this picture, anyway. "I'm just happy that I actually got a close-up, goddess! This family is so big that's not exactly a sure thing these days." True.

And of course there are more birthdays. First April, with long, luscious, curly brown hair.

And then little blond charmer Aspen. Wow, that blond gene goes back to great-grandmother Elise. Awesome. "So when can I get pregnant again anyway?" Uhh... I think you already are.

Aspen the charmer of course has to toddle outside and ask for hugs and attention from everyone who passes. Here he's endearing himself to Marina (smoothiequeen87), who came home from work with Jack. "Plane wide, pwetty lady? Aihplane?" "Shouldn't you be wearing a jacket, little man?" "No jacket! Hugs!" "Aww... how can I resist."

See? I told you that you were pregnant again. "I know. Now get this thing out of me so I can get pregnant again!" Y'know, popping out babies this close together isn't really doing all that much to improve your reputation, Meadow. "I am NOT barefoot! Therefore it's an improoooo-ow-vement!"

Alder Thayer is a second boy, but I have a feeling that Meadow isn't done having babies yet. "Just look at that LTW and weep, goddess. Yeah, that's right. Six kids married off." You're so horrible to me.

Ahem. Moving on. In the house o' cheese, it's Wedge's birthday, and this is only really significant because...

... Ben and Ivy were both invited. "Snowball fight?" "Sure!"

However, the snowball fight was abruptly aborted when Ben decided that he just had to talk to Ivy about the counterfeit pearls she was selling through her store. "You know, we are starting to get tired of the whole counterfeit pearl thing."

Right. So onward we go to Marina's house, where Gage has moved in so he can finally lose the ten pounds of grilled cheese around his tummy and also spend some time with Elphaba. "This isn't spending time with my daughter. This is distracting her so she doesn't notice that the nanny has set the kitchen on fire twice in a row." Good old Karen Gast. Maybe she'll burn with it!

Once the firefighter finally got the flames out and Marina got home from work, it was time for Elphaba's burst into teenhood. Not surprisingly, Marina is friends with 3/4 of the simselves on the Island so they all showed up for 'Faba's party. "It's not that we want to hang out with Marina so much as we want to see what kind of genetics have been inflicted on poor Elphaba." Hush, Candi. Be nice.

And now we can see the damage. Honestly, guys, this is the flattering pic. Click sideways if you really dare.

Yes, it's Gage on estrogen. Oh, the cheekbones. The horrible, painful cheekbones!

Still, a makeover can do wonders, as can distance. Elphaba wanted nothing more than to emulate her Aunt Candi and copied her hairstyle exactly. I think it actually kind of works. In a Billie Piper-esque kind of way, with the frighteningly huge mouth and all. Well, from here, anyway.

A hugenormous row of easy-bake ovens? Must be the house cursed with two sets of twins in the same night. They somehow survived on muffins and gelatin.

"Hey Celeste, now that the kids are getting bigger have you ever thought about having more?" "Word of warning, husband mine. Repeating of that line, Dear Alan, one more time, Will have you out on your behind."

"But Celeste, they're so sweet and good-natured." "This doesn't quite count As a second offence As you didn't bring forth The words of dissonance In their full form. But please I love you, dear Alan. Don't make me castrate you."

"Celeste, Other-Alan? I was using the potty 'cause I'm pregnant and have to pee every thirty seconds when I found this! Care to explain yourselves?" "They were sold out of Commodore Bear." "That's no excuse. I'm going to have to tell the family. If you'll excuse me..." "Don't leave so soon, dear cousin, Our bubble-blower will soon have you buzzin'." "Oooooh... wait, what was I saying?"

And finally, much to Other-Alan and Celeste's relief, the four kids turned into four teenagers in a fantastic performance of Synchronised Grow Up. Just to refresh everyone's memories, the kids are (L-R): Sadism (probably), Irony (I hope), William (most likely, behind Celeste), and Blake (indubitably).

And that brings us back to Legacy Manor, which has undergone extensive remodeling because the lag was atrocious. So I made it smaller and decided to use the lot more. Doesn't it look terribly cosy and snug (and gingerbread) under that lovely blanket of snow?

"Alan, me love, d'ye think that the goddess will ever focus on our family again?" "Well, as long as she's not looking too closely we can cuddle, right Mary?" "Aye!" *cough* "Awww... do you think you could give us a few more minutes of privacy, goddess?" Sure. There's an adorable toddler in the nursery anyway.

"Arrrr!" I don't care what anybody says, Pao makes the most adorable kids ever. See? I, ah, took five pictures of Roche just sitting in his crib. Hubby made me narrow it down to just this one. What can I say? My biological clock is in 'awwwwwww' mode.

"Grandma, Herc says that maybe the Simselves will be able to help me find who my real father is. Do you know any Simselves?" "Aye, I be good friends with Candi... ye want me to invite her over sometime, Bart?" "Could you please?" "Sure thing, Bart. In a few days, aye?" "Hooray!"

Some things never change. Which one is that, Ivy? "Oh Ravi, you pass the kissing stage of the audition!"

*sigh* Another trophy for Ivy's bedroom... What does Pao think of your collection, Ivy? "We don't think he really notices, goddess."

Ahh... I see things have finally improved between the two of you? "Well, it's spring and love is in the air so we thought it couldn't hurt to audition Ben. Have you ever done a public woohoo, Ben?"

*ahem* "What?"

"You're in our harem definitely, Ben!" "Awesome!" Uhh... don't you need to take a picture, Ivy? "We already did when you weren't looking." Oops. My bad.

Ivy then rolled up a want to invite over the Royal Placeholder so she did as soon as Blite had left, oblivious to the fact that he isn't the only one in the harem (until he reads this, anyway!). "Angel, we have missed you!" "I've missed you too, Queen Ivy! Hey, have you thought about letting me be Chief Concubine again?" "Uhh... ask us again when our children go to university." "Gee! Okay!"

And because public woohoo somehow counts as separate woohoo in the audition count, Ivy goes platinum a second time. "It is not enough to be our subjects' ruler and overlord. Now we wish to become their goddess." Hey! "Goddess of rock and roll, that is!" Oy... well, go for it.

"So what are you here for?" "Oh, I had a harem audition yesterday. You?" "This morning." "How'd it go?"

"Daddy, I think I see the general and he's looking for his MRE's!" "What? Where?" "Hehehe... I'll just switch these few pieces while dad isn't looking..." Bart, cheating isn't very nice. "Maybe I'm not very nice. But it works!"

"For the last time, Bart, I do not think zhat I am your father!" "Aww... you made me mess my pants!" "Vhell, stop bothering me! Can't a ghost float around in peace anymore? Sheesh."

Birthday time! Will the cutest toddler in the world become the cutest kid in the world?

And the survey says... yes! And, how did I not notice this before? BLUE EYES! Squee!!!1111oneone "I'm gonna be the pirate that all the girls love." Oh, there's no doubt about that, Roche. Now, why don't you run upstairs to bed before one of the ghosts scares you.

Oops. Too late. "Listen, Roche, and listen vhell. Your family is under a terrible curse." "Wh-what do you mean?" "Unless you act, your family tree ends vith you! That is vhat I mean! Muahahahahahaha!" And here's where I leave you, dear readers. Is what the Count just told Roche true? Is the family tree doomed to be a barren one? Will the Legacy die? Will Bart ever find out who is father is? Will Ivy ever get tired of auditioning new recruits? Will Pao ever find out about the Royal Harem? And finally, will PB and Flavius ever fall in love?

Well, here's the answer to one question, at least :) But for the rest you'll have to wait for next time. As always, thanks for reading and happy Simming! None of the CC was made by me except the purple pirate recolour, which I will probably upload one of these days. Simselves (who may or may not have appeared in this installment): Simself - Legacy(ies) : Characters in my game Candi - Uglacy, Prettacy, Gage's Bachelor Challenge : Samara, Don, & Gage Uglacy PikaKyle - Say Goodbye Sims (Apocalypse), several other legacies :

Aaron Apocalypse smoothiequeen87 - Fitzhugh Legacy : Nadine, Allegra, & Rhys Fitzhugh Ephemeral Toast - Apocalypso-A-Go-Go! rachelgrey - Literary Legacy ShiraBlank... - member of boolprop.com smartypants210 - Az Alphabet Legacy Blite27 - Ten Caesars Legacy : Publius Numantius, Flavius Marius, Drusus Nero Professor Butters - Squeaky Clean Legacy : Sunny Goodytwoshoes Orikes - Pseudo Legacy : Zoey & Brody Legacina fireflower314 - from boolprop.com Aerdrene - Godd Legacy