7 Days of Mindful Living: Mindful Steps to Enhancing Your Life Expectancy
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7 Days of Mindful Living:
Mindful Steps to Enhancing Your Life Expectancy
Copyright 2016 Deniz Yalım
Published by Deniz Yalım at Smashwords
Smashwords Edition License Notes
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or
given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please
purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase
it, or it was not purchased for your enjoyment only, then please return to Smashwords.com or
your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of
this author.
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Table of Contents
Introduction
❍ 12 Indispensable Mindful Living Tools
Why You Should Care
The Toolset
❍ Meditation: The Most Fundamental Habit
How Meditation Helps Habits
How to Form the Meditation Habit
❍ 7 DAYS OF MINDFULNESS
1. MINDFUL BREATHING
2. BODY SCAN MEDITATION
3. EXTERNAL WORLD AND BREATH
4. MINDFULNESS OF THOUGHTS
5. THOUGHTS SENSATIONS AND EMOTIONS
6. MENTAL SUBTRACTION OF POSITIVE EVENTS
7. LOVING-KINDNESS MEDITATION
❍ Meditation for Beginners: 20 Practical Tips for Understanding the Mind
30 Days to Change Your Life
About Deniz Yalım
Connect with Deniz Yalım
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Introduction
Dear friends,
Before starting, I would like to thank you for joining me. I hope you enjoy.
Consider how you can integrate one or more of these basic mindfulness exercises into your
daily routine. Something as simple as taking a few minutes each morning to practice
mindfulness can result in wonderful changes in your everyday experiencing of the present
moment.
Recommended tool: Peace Starter Meditation(free at Google Play)
Bringing peace and quiet back into your life has just gone simple, easy, free and fun – with
the Peace Starter App.
If you think that meditation would help you but believe that it is something too inaccessible
for you, think again.
The free Peace Starter App offers you a free, easy-to-follow and easy-to-apply guided
meditation experience – right from the convenience of your phone!
With proven meditation and mindfulness techniques, and the right meditation music, we will
help you train your mind for you to lead the healthy, happy, balanced and enjoyable life that you
always dream about.
With the Peace Starter App, you will:
• Relax and feel calmer
• Improve your focus and attention
• Learn faster and with less effort
• Increase your self-awareness and feel better about yourself
In a nutshell, the Peace Starter App offers you the ultimate and most accessible meditation
experience – allowing you to increase the levels of Prana (energy) in your body, which will
positively reflect on your mind.
Wishing you peaceful times ahead,
Sincerely,
Deniz Yalım
BayArt
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Uncopyright
All ideas in this book are stolen and have no owner. This entire work is therefore uncopyrighted
and in the public domain. No permission is required to copy, reprint, or otherwise gleefully rip of
anything I’ve written. I don’t believe in the right to deny the freedom of ideas.
Use all content however you want! Email it, share it, and reprint it with or without credit.
Change it around, put in a bunch of swear words and attribute them to me. It’s OK. Attribution is
appreciated but not required.
Why I’m releasing copyright
I’m not a big fan of copyright laws, especially as they’re being applied by corporations, used to
crack down on the little guys so they can continue their large profits.
Copyrights are often said to protect the artist, but in most cases the artist gets very little
while the corporations make most of the money. In the 4+ years I’ve done this experiment,
releasing copyright has not hurt me, the creator of the content, a single bit.
I think, in most cases, the protectionism that is touted by “anti-piracy” campaigns and
lawsuits and lobbying actually hurts the artist. Limiting distribution to protect profits isn’t a good
thing.
The lack of copyright, and blatant copying by other artists and even businesses, never hurt
Leonardo da Vinci when it comes to images such as the Mona Lisa, the Last Supper, or the
Vitruvian Man. It’s never hurt Shakespeare. I doubt that it’s ever really hurt any artist (although I
might just be ignorant here).
And while I’m certainly not da Vinci or Shakespeare, copyright hasn’t helped me, and
uncopyright hasn’t hurt me. If someone feels like sharing my content on their blog, or in any
other form for that matter, that’s a good thing for me. If someone wanted to share my ebook with
100 friends, I don’t see how that hurts me. My work is being spread to many more people than I
could do myself. That’s something to celebrate, as I see it.
And if someone wants to take my work and improve upon it, as artists have been doing for
centuries, I think that’s a wonderful thing. If they can take my favorite posts and make something
funny or inspiring or thought-provoking or even sad … I say more power to them. The creative
community only benefits from derivations and inspirations.
So please share this e-book with your friends, family and anybody you want. Thank you.
Did you know that Sharing Feels Good
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12 Indispensable Mindful Living Tools
The focus of my life in recent months has been living mindfully, and while I don’t always
remember to do that, I have learned a few things worth sharing.
The first is a mindful life is worth the effort. It’s a life where we awaken from the dream
state we’re most often submerged in — the state of having your mind anywhere but the present
moment, locked in thoughts about what you’re going to do later, about something someone else
said, about something you’re stressing about or angry about. The state of mind where we’re lost
in our smartphones and social media.
It’s worth the effort, because being awake means we’re not missing life as we walk through
it. Being awake means we’re conscious of what’s going on inside us, as it happens, and so can
make more conscious choices rather than acting on our impulses all the time.
The second thing I’ve learned is that we forget. We forget, over and over, to be awake. And
that’s OK. Being mindful is a process of forgetting, and then remembering. Repeatedly. Just as
breathing is a process of exhaling, and then inhaling, repeatedly.
The third is that mindful living isn’t just one thing. It’s not just meditation. Nor is it just
focusing on the sensations around you, right now in this moment. I’ve found mindful living to be
a set of very related tools, perhaps all different ways of getting at the same thing, but each useful
in its own regard.
I’ll share them in this post, and hope that you’ll consider each in turn.
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Why You Should Care
Why bother to spend the time learning these tools? Is it just for some ideal of living a peaceful,
stress-free life?
No. A stress-free life doesn’t exist, but these tools will definitely make you more prepared to
deal with the stresses that will inevitably come your way.
But just as importantly, they’ll help you overcome the fear of failure and fear of discomfort
that’s holding you back, that’s keeping you from making positive changes in your life.
These tools will help you launch your new blog, start a business, write a book, put out your
first music album online, find your purpose in life, become the person you’ve always wanted to
be.
This is what I’ve found. I’m certain you’ll find these tools just as useful.
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The Toolset
This list, of course, is not complete. It’s a collection of things I’ve been learning about, and am
still practicing, things I’ve found useful enough to share.
Meditation. Meditation is where mindful living starts. And it’s not complicated: you can sit
still for even just 1 minute a day to start with (work up to 3-5 minutes after a week), and turn
your attention to your body and then your breath. Notice when your thoughts wander from your
breath, and gently return to the breath. Repeat until the minute is up. Let accept “Do Nothing
‘Can You Do That’” challenge at your Peace Starter Meditation app, you can just focus on
meditation without thinking about keeping track of time.
Be Awake. Meditation is practice for being awake, which is not being in the dream state
(mind wandering into a train of thought, getting lost in the online world, thinking about past
offenses, stressing about the future, etc.) but being awake to the present, to what is. Being awake
is something you can do throughout the day, all the time, if you remember. Remembering is the
trick.
Watch Urges. When I quit smoking in 2014, the most useful tool I learned was watching
my urges to smoke. I would sit there and watch the urge rise and fall, until it was gone, without
acting on it. It taught me that I am not my urges, that I don’t have to act on my urges, and this
helped me change all my other habits. Watch your urge to check email or social media, to eat
something sweet or fried, to drink alcohol, to watch TV, to be distracted, to procrastinate. These
urges will come and go, and you don’t have to act on them.
Watch Ideals. We all have ideals, all the time. We have an ideal that our day will go
perfectly, that people will be kind and respectful to us, that we will be perfect, that we’ll ace an
exam or important meeting that we’ll never fail. Of course, we know from experience that those
ideals are not real, that they don’t come true, that they aren’t realistic. But we still have them,
and they cause our stress and fears and grief over something/someone we’ve lost. By letting go
of ideals, we can let go of our suffering.
Accept People & Life As They Are. When I stopped trying to change a loved one, and
accepted him for who he was, I was able to just be with him and enjoy my time with him. This
acceptance has the same effect for anything you do — accept a co-worker, a child, a spouse, but
also accept a “bad” situation, an unpleasant feeling, and an annoying sound. When we stop trying
to fight the way things are, when we accept what is, we are much more at peace.
Let Go of Expectations. This is really the same thing as the previous two items, but I’ve
found it useful nonetheless. It’s useful to watch your expectations with an upcoming situation,
with a new project or business, and see that it’s not real and that it’s causing you stress and
disappointment. We cause our own pain, and we can relieve it by letting go of the expectations
that are causing it. Toss your expectations into the ocean.
Become OK with Discomfort. The fear of discomfort is huge — it causes people to be
stuck in their old bad habits, to not start the business they want to start, to be stuck in a job they
don’t really like, because we tend to stick to the known and comfortable rather than try
something unknown and uncomfortable. It’s why many people don’t eat vegetables or exercise,
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why they eat junk, why they don’t start something new. But we can be OK with discomfort, with
practice. Start with things that are a little uncomfortable, and keep expanding your comfort zone.
Watch Your Resistance. When you try to do something uncomfortable, or try to give up
something you like or are used to, you’ll find resistance. But you can just watch the resistance,
and be curious about it. Watch your resistance to things that annoy you — a loud sound that
interrupts your concentration, for example. It’s not the sound that’s the problem, it’s your
resistance to the sound. The same is true of resistance to food we don’t like, to being too cold or
hot, to being hungry. The problem isn’t the sensation of the food, cold, heat or hunger — it’s our
resistance to them. Watch the resistance, and feel it melt. This resistance, by the way, is why I’m
doing my Year of Living Without.
Be Curious. Too often we are stuck in our ways, and think we know how things should be,
how people are. Instead, be curious. Find out. Experiment. Let go of what you think you know.
When you start a new project or venture, if you feel the fear of failure, instead of thinking, “Oh
no, I’m going to fail” or “Oh no, I don’t know how this will turn out”, try thinking, “Let’s see.
Let’s find out.” And then there isn’t the fear of failure, but the joy of being curious and finding
out. Learn to be OK with not knowing.
Be Grateful. We complain about everything. But life is a miracle. Find something to be
grateful about in everything you do. Be grateful when you’re doing a new habit, and you’ll stick
to it longer. Be grateful when you’re with someone, and you’ll be happier with them. Life is
amazing, if you learn to appreciate it.
Let Go of Control. We often think we control things, but that’s only an illusion. Our
obsession with organization and goals and productivity, for example, are rooted in the illusion
that we can control life. But life is uncontrollable, and just when we think we have things under
control, something unexpected comes up to disrupt everything. And then we’re frustrated
because things didn’t go the way we wanted. Instead, practice letting go of control, and learn to
flow.
Be Compassionate. This sounds trite, but compassion for others can change the way you
feel about the world, on a day-to-day basis. And compassion for yourself is life-changing. These
two things need remembering, though, so mindful living is about remembering to be
compassionate after you forget.
Open your Peace Starter Meditation app and go Universe Meditation section whenever you
want to “Accept People & Life As They Are”, “Let Go of Expectations”,” Become OK with Discomfort”,” Watch Your Resistance”,” Be Grateful” and “Let Go of Control”. Also this help clear your mind and Hope you feel a little less stressed and a little
more connected
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Meditation: The Most Fundamental Habit
‘To meditate does not mean to fight with a problem.
To meditate means to observe.’
~Thich Nhat Hanh It’s no secret that I advocate meditation as a great way to start your day, deal with stress,
live in the present and more.
But what many people don’t realize is that meditation is perhaps the most important habit if
you want to change other habits.
Be Mindful of Negative Thoughts
How do you learn to be mindful of your negative thoughts? Simple: you practice. And how
do you practice mindfulness of your thoughts? By far the best method I’ve found is meditation.
Let’s look at why meditation is so good for helping to change your habits, and how to form
the meditation habit.
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How Meditation Helps Habits
When we are unaware of our thoughts and urges, which arise in the back of our mind mostly
unnoticed, they have a power over us. We are unable to change if these unbidden thoughts
control us. But when we learn to observe them, we can then release their power over us.
Meditation is practice for observing those thoughts, for being more mindful of them
throughout the day.
I will give you several examples in my own life, though actually there are dozens:
When I quit smoking, I would get an urge to take just one drag on a cigarette, and it would
get so strong I had a hard time beating it. At the same time, I had these rationalizing thoughts:
“It’s OK to smoke just one — one cigarette doesn’t hurt you”, or “Why are you making yourself
suffer like this? It’s not worth it!” And those thoughts and urges would have beat me if I let
them, but I watched them. I didn’t act, I just watched. And the would rise and crest and then
fade, and I would be OK.
When I started running, I wanted to stop when things got uncomfortable. But I learned that it
was just a scared part of my mind that wanted to stop, a part of me that shied away from
discomfort. I would watch that scared part of me that makes me quit anything hard, and not let it
control me.
When I write, I often get the urge to go do something else. When this urge goes unnoticed, I
just act on it, and procrastinate. When I am mindful of this urge (and the accompanying
rationalizations that come if I don’t act on the urge), then I can pause and watch the urge and let
it go, and return to the writing.
This same process helped me change my eating habits, run a marathon, change my clutter
habits, and much more.
But none of that would have been possible if I didn’t learn to watch, to be mindful of my
urges and rationalizations and negative thoughts that told me I couldn’t do it.
How did I learn to watch and be mindful? Meditation. It is the one habit where all you’re
doing is practicing this mindful observing, where everything else is stripped away in a beautiful
simplicity that leaves just you and your thoughts and the present moment.
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How to Form the Meditation Habit
It’s pretty simple, but the doing is everything:
Commit to just 2 minutes a day. Start simply if you want the habit to stick. You can do
it for 5 minutes if you feel good about it, but all you’re committing to is 2 minutes each day. “Do
Nothing ‘Can You Do That’” challenge at your Peace Starter Meditation app can help you and
the sound of meditation timer is so pure, so serene and so perfect for enhancing your experience
of meditation
Pick a time and trigger. Not an exact time of day, but a general time, like morning when
you wake up, or during your lunch hour. The trigger should be something you already do
regularly, like drink your first cup of coffee, brush your teeth, have lunch, or arrive home from
work.
Find a quiet spot. Sometimes early morning is best, before others in your house might be
awake and making lots of noise. Others might find a spot in a park or on the beach or some other
soothing setting. It really doesn’t matter where — as long as you can sit without being bothered
for a few minutes. A few people walking by your park bench is fine.
Sit comfortably. Don’t fuss too much about how you sit, what you wear, what you sit on,
etc. I personally like to sit on a pillow on the floor, with my back leaning against a wall, because
I’m very inflexible. Others who can sit cross-legged comfortably might do that instead. Still
others can sit on a chair or couch if sitting on the floor is uncomfortable. Zen practitioners often
use a zafu, a round cushion filled with kapok or buckwheat. Don’t go out and buy one if you
don’t already have one. Any cushion or pillow will do, and some people can sit on a bare floor
comfortably.
Focus on your breath. As you breathe in, follow your breath in through your nostrils,
then into your throat, then into your lungs and belly. Sit straight, keep your eyes open but
looking at the ground and with a soft focus. If you want to close your eyes, that’s fine. As you
breathe out, follow your breath out back into the world. If it helps, count … one breath in, two
breath out, three breath in, four breath out … when you get to 10, start over. If you lose track,
start over. If you find your mind wandering (and you will), just pay attention to your mind
wandering, then bring it gently back to your breath. Repeat this process for the few minutes you
meditate. You won’t be very good at it at first, most likely, but you’ll get better with practice.
And that’s it. It’s a very simple practice, but you want to do it for 2 minutes, every day, after
the same trigger each day. Do this for a month and you’ll have a daily meditation habit.
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7 DAYS OF MINDFULNESS
The thing you begin to notice after a while of practicing mindfulness, both sitting in meditation
and living with mindfulness in your everyday life, is that it’s more than just a meditation
practice, it’s a very way of life. A very effective approach to life’s major challenges as a whole.
Mindfulness is about more than just paying attention in an open and nonjudgmental way to
the present moment (or reality, present moment events), it’s about waking up, or becoming more
“conscious”. It’s really about living more fully.
To live mindfully is to hold your life with the greatest level of appreciation and importance
possible. You’re aware that you won’t live forever, and have begun to become aware of just how
beautiful and amazing life can be, and you do your best to appreciate every moment and make
the most of your life.
And in that effort includes everything. Particularly, efforts which will allow us to enjoy the
beauty and peace of the present moment more and which will allow us to more skillfully
handle the challenges and difficulties we face in everyday life such as living in the past,
worrying about the future, not forgiving ourselves, holding in resentment and anger, living with
fear, etc.
This is mindful living, and it’s living with the spirit of mindfulness throughout your
everyday life.
It’s taking that intentional and single-pointed action, open acceptance, and compassionate
and clear awareness to everything that you do. And you’ll see that if you work on applying this
in each area of your life, one small step at a time, when you turn back around, you’ve created no
less than a transformation.
So, how exactly can you transform your life, one step at a time, by applying the spirit of
mindfulness to your everyday activities? Let’s take a look…
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1. MINDFUL BREATHING
TIME REQUIRED & WHY YOU SHOULD TRY IT
8 minutes daily for at least a week (though evidence suggests that mindfulness increases the
more you practice it).
Stress, anger, and anxiety can impair not only our health but our judgment and skills of
attention. Fortunately, research suggests an effective way to deal with these difficult feelings: the
practice of "mindfulness,” the ability to pay careful attention to what you're thinking, feeling, and
sensing in the present moment without judging those thoughts and feelings as good or bad.
Countless studies link mindfulness to better health, lower anxiety, and greater resilience to stress.
But how do you cultivate mindfulness? A basic method is to focus your attention on your
own breathing—a practice called, quite simply, "mindful breathing." After setting aside time to
practice mindful breathing, you should find it easier to focus attention on your breath in your
daily life—an important skill to help you deal with stress, anxiety, and negative emotions, cool
yourself down when your temper flares, and sharpen your skills of concentration.
Mindfulness gives people distance from their thoughts and feelings, which can help them
tolerate and work through unpleasant feelings rather than becoming overwhelmed by them.
Mindful breathing in particular is helpful because it gives people an anchor--their breath--on
which they can focus when they find themselves carried away by a stressful thought. Mindful
breathing also helps people stay “present” in the moment, rather than being distracted by regrets
in the past or worries about the future.
The most basic way to do mindful breathing is simply to focus your attention on your
breath, the inhale and exhale. You can do this while standing, but ideally you’ll be sitting or even
lying in a comfortable position. Your eyes may be open or closed, but you may find it easier to
maintain your focus if you close your eyes. It can help to set aside a designated time for this
exercise, but it can also help to practice it when you’re feeling particularly stressed or
anxious. Experts believe a regular practice of mindful breathing can make it easier to do it in
difficult situations.
Sometimes, especially when trying to calm yourself in a stressful moment, it might help to
start by taking an exaggerated breath: a deep inhale through your nostrils (3 seconds), hold your
breath (2 seconds), and a long exhale through your mouth (4 seconds). Otherwise, simply
observe each breath without trying to adjust it; it may help to focus on the rise and fall of your
chest or the sensation through your nostrils. As you do so, you may find that your mind wanders,
distracted by thoughts or bodily sensations. That’s OK. Just notice that this is happening and
gently bring your attention back to your breath.
HOW TO DO:
Now open your Peace Starter Meditation app and go ‘Guided Mindfulness Meditation’
section, select ‘Mindful Breathing’ and start your session.
Otherwise you can use following video Youtube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Jqq4h1vCBk
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2. BODY SCAN MEDITATION
TIME REQUIRED & WHY YOU SHOULD TRY IT
6 min. three to six days per week for four weeks. Research suggests that people who practice the
body scan for longer reap more benefits from this practice.
The purpose of this body scan mindfulness exercise is simply to notice your body. It is not
necessarily about relaxing your body, however this may occur as a kind of side effect. It is
simply about being aware of your body, in this present moment.
Usually, our response to bodily pain or discomfort is to distract ourselves or to try
and numb the pain. In this exercise you will accept and notice with gentle curiosity your body in
its comfort and discomfort.
This exercise asks you to systematically focus your attention on different parts of
your body, from your feet to the muscles in your face. It is designed to help you develop
a mindful awareness of your bodily sensations, and to relieve tension wherever it is found.
Research suggests that this mindfulness practice can help reduce stress, improve well-being, and
decrease aches and pains.
The body scan provides a rare opportunity for us to experience our body as it is, without
judging or trying to change it. It may allow us to notice and release a source of tension we
weren’t aware of before, such as a hunched back or clenched jaw muscles. Or it may draw our
attention to a source of pain and discomfort. Our feelings of resistance and anger toward pain
often only serve to increase that pain, and to increase the distress associated with it; according to
research, by simply noticing the pain we’re experiencing, without trying to change it, we may
actually feel some relief.
The body scan is designed to counteract these negative feelings toward our bodies. This
practice may also increase our general attunement to our physical needs and sensations, which
can in turn help us take better care of our bodies and make healthier decisions about eating,
sleep, and exercise
HOW TO DO:
Now open your Peace Starter Meditation app and go ‘Guided Mindfulness Meditation’
section, select ‘Body Scan Meditation’ and start your session.
Otherwise you can use following video YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USxEX1Qp31M
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3. EXTERNAL WORLD AND BREATH
TIME REQUIRED & WHY YOU SHOULD TRY IT
6 min.
An exercise in noticing the world around you and how it comes into contact with your
body, and your breathing, mindfulness of external world and breath.
External mindfulness means awareness of the thoughts, body movements, and emotions of
others. External mindfulness holds the key to understanding whether people read you as likeable
and reasonable, or annoying and out of touch.
I learn external mindfulness through the universal facial expressions of emotion. In any
negotiation, you need external mindfulness to recognize such things as the facial expression of
contempt.
HOW TO DO:
Now open your Peace Starter Meditation app and go ‘Guided Mindfulness Meditation’ section,
select ‘External world and breath’ and start your session.
Otherwise you can use following video YouTube: https://youtu.be/LsvOfmNLPIk
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4. MINDFULNESS OF THOUGHTS
TIME REQUIRED & WHY YOU SHOULD TRY IT
6 min.
We often treat thoughts as if they were facts. You may have the thought “I am no good at
this,” or “He’s is a jerk,” or “Nobody understand me,” or even “I am brilliant!” Does thinking it
make it so?
When we have a thought many times, over and over, it can condense into a belief. So a
belief is a thought, or a number of connected thoughts, that we have a lot of the time. Beliefs are
then quite often taken as facts.
For example: “The world is flat.” Enough people had that thought, or held the assumption,
often enough for it to be assumed to be a fact for centuries!
When we start to pay attention to our thoughts, with a gentle curiosity, then we start to
think about our thinking. We can then move away from believing that the thought is a fact.
Then there’s this: If the thought does have evidence pointing to it being a fact, ask yourself
a different question. “What does buying into this thought do to me? Does it help? Is it working?”
If the answer is no, then simply move on from the thought. Choose not to get caught up in
it.
HOW TO DO:
Now open your Peace Starter Meditation app and go ‘Guided Mindfulness Meditation’ section,
select ‘Mindfulness of thoughts’ and start your session.
Otherwise you can use following video YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYEH8XWuFvo
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5. THOUGHTS SENSATIONS AND EMOTIONS
TIME REQUIRED & WHY YOU SHOULD TRY IT
6 min.
Feelings are often labelled as positive (happy, confident, joyful, brave, etc) or negative
(sad, scared, hurt, angry etc). In mindfulness practice, feelings are not good or bad; they just are
what they are – emotions that might be comfortable or uncomfortable, easy or difficult. We are
often taught to feel that the experience of some feelings is wrong – “You mustn’t feel like that,”
“Be positive,” “Don’t be sad/scared/hurt” – and that the experience of some feelings is right –
“Be happy/brave,” “Lighten up,” “Move on, get over it.” This exercise is simply about noticing
whatever you are feeling, at the moment you are feeling it, with a gentle, non-judgemental
acceptance and curiosity.
HOW TO DO:
Now open your Peace Starter Meditation app and go ‘Guided Mindfulness Meditation’ section,
select ‘Thoughts sensations and emotions’ and start your session.
Otherwise you can use following video YouTube: https://youtu.be/guO6wRm1L-Y
Did you know that Sharing can cause the release of oxytocin, a hormone that increases feelings
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6. MENTAL SUBTRACTION OF POSITIVE EVENTS
TIME REQUIRED & WHY YOU SHOULD TRY IT
6 min.
Try to make time to do this practice once per week, focusing on a different positive event
each week. It might help to do this practice at the same time each week—before bed each
Sunday evening, perhaps, or at lunch every Friday.
It’s easy to take the good things in life for granted, but research suggests that the more we
stop to appreciate what we have, the happier and healthier we are. This exercise is designed to
help you increase feelings of gratitude for positive events in your life by visualizing what your
life would be like without them. By getting a taste of their absence, you should be able to
appreciate their presence in your life more deeply—without actually having to lose them for real.
Mental subtraction counteracts our tendency to take positive events in our lives as givens.
When we consider the circumstances that led to an event, we may be surprised by how unlikely
that event actually was, and how lucky we were that it happened as it did. While it can be painful
to think about not having experienced an important positive event, this scenario provides a
negative contrast against which our current situation can be favorably compared.
HOW TO DO:
Now open your Peace Starter Meditation app and go ‘Guided Mindfulness Meditation’ section,
select ‘MENTAL SUBTRACTION OF POSITIVE EVENTS’ and start your session.
Otherwise you can use following video YouTube: https://youtu.be/2j7wFmY7G4c
Did you know that Sharing increases positive social interaction with others, which can prolong
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7. LOVING-KINDNESS MEDITATION
TIME REQUIRED & WHY YOU SHOULD TRY IT
7 minutes/Daily
Practicing kindness is one of the most direct routes to happiness: Research suggests that
kind people tend to be more satisfied with their relationships and with their lives in general. We
all have a natural capacity for kindness, but sometimes we don’t take steps to nurture and express
this capacity as much as we could.
Loving-kindness meditation (sometimes called “metta” meditation) is a great way to
cultivate our propensity for kindness. It involves mentally sending goodwill, kindness, and
warmth towards others by silently repeating a series of mantras.
Loving-kindness meditation increases happiness in part by making people feel more
connected to others—to loved ones, acquaintances, and even strangers. Research suggests that
when people practice loving-kindness meditation regularly, they start automatically reacting
more positively to others—and their social interactions and close relationships become more
satisfying. Loving-kindness meditation can also reduce people’s focus on themselves—which
can, in turn, lower symptoms of anxiety and depression.
HOW TO DO:
Now open your Peace Starter Meditation app and go ‘Guided Mindfulness Meditation’ section,
select ‘Loving-Kindness Meditation’ and start your session.
Otherwise you can use following video YouTube: https://youtu.be/OUfLVOWVtN8
Did you know that Sharing invokes gratitude, and gratitude is highly correlated with happiness.
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Meditation for Beginners: 20 Practical Tips for Understanding the Mind
The most important habit I’ve formed in the last 10 years of forming habits is meditation. Hands
down, bar none.
Meditation has helped me to form all my other habits, it’s helped me to become more
peaceful, more focused, less worried about discomfort, more appreciative and attentive to
everything in my life. I’m far from perfect, but it has helped me come a long way.
Probably most importantly, it has helped me understand my own mind. Before I started
meditating, I never thought about what was going on inside my head — it would just happen,
and I would follow its commands like an automaton. These days, all of that still happens, but
more and more, I am aware of what’s going on. I can make a choice about whether to follow the
commands. I understand myself better (not completely, but better), and that has given me
increased flexibility and freedom.
So … I highly recommend this habit. And while I’m not saying it’s easy, you can start small
and get better and better as you practice. Don’t expect to be good at first — that’s why it’s called
“practice”!
These tips aren’t aimed at helping you to become an expert … they should help you get
started and keep going. You don’t have to implement them all at once — try a few, come back to
this article, try one or two more. Sit for just two minutes. This will seem ridiculously easy, to just meditate for two
minutes. That’s perfect. Start with just two minutes a day for a week. If that goes well, increase by another two minutes and do that for a week. If all goes well, by increasing just a little at a time, you’ll be meditating for 10 minutes a day in the 2nd month, which is amazing! But start small first.
Do it first thing each morning. It’s easy to say, “I’ll meditate every day,” but then forget to do it. Instead, set a reminder for every morning when you get up, and put a note that says “meditate” somewhere where you’ll see it.
Don’t get caught up in the how — just do. Most people worry about where to sit, how to sit, what cushion to use … this is all nice, but it’s not that important to get started. Start just by sitting on a chair, or on your couch. Or on your bed. If you’re comfortable on the ground, sit cross-legged. It’s just for two minutes at first anyway, so just sit. Later you can worry about optimizing it so you’ll be comfortable for longer, but in the beginning it doesn’t matter much, just sit somewhere quiet and comfortable.
Check in with how you’re feeling. As you first settle into your meditation session, simply check to see how you’re feeling. How does your body feel? What is the quality of your mind? Busy? Tired? Anxious? See whatever you’re bringing to this meditation session as completely OK.
Count your breaths. Now that you’re settled in, turn your attention to your breath. Just place the attention on your breath as it comes in, and follow it through your nose all
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the way down to your lungs. Try counting “one” as you take in the first breath, then “two” as you breathe out. Repeat this to the count of 10, then start again at one.
Come back when you wander. Your mind will wander. This is an almost absolute certainty. There’s no problem with that. When you notice your mind wandering, smile, and simply gently return to your breath. Count “one” again, and start over. You might feel a little frustration, but it’s perfectly OK to not stay focused, we all do it. This is the practice, and you won’t be good at it for a little while.
Develop a loving attitude. When you notice thoughts and feelings arising during meditation, as they will, look at them with a friendly attitude. See them as friends, not intruders or enemies. They are a part of you, though not all of you. Be friendly and not harsh.
Don’t worry too much that you’re doing it wrong. You will worry you’re doing it wrong. That’s OK, we all do. You’re not doing it wrong. There’s no perfect way to do it, just be happy you’re doing it.
Don’t worry about clearing the mind. Lots of people think meditation is about clearing your mind, or stopping all thoughts. It’s not. This can sometimes happen, but it’s not the “goal” of meditation. If you have thoughts, that’s normal. We all do. Our brains are thought factories, and we can’t just shut them down. Instead, just try to practice focusing your attention, and practice some more when your mind wanders.
Stay with whatever arises. When thoughts or feelings arise, and they will, you might try staying with them awhile. Yes, I know I said to return to the breath, but after you practice that for a week, you might also try staying with a thought or feeling that arises. We tend to want to avoid feelings like frustration, anger, anxiety … but an amazingly useful meditation practice is to stay with the feeling for a while. Just stay, and be curious.
Get to know yourself. This practice isn’t just about focusing your attention, it’s about learning how your mind works. What’s going on inside there? It’s murky, but by watching your mind wander, get frustrated, avoid difficult feelings … you can start to understand yourself.
Become friends with yourself. As you get to know yourself, do it with a friendly attitude instead of one of criticism. You’re getting to know a friend. Smile and give yourself love.
Do a body scan. Another thing you can do, once you become a little better at following your breath, is focus your attention on one body part at a time. Start at the soles of your feet — how do those feel? Slowly move to your toes, the tops of your feet, your ankles, all the way to the top of your head.
Notice the light, sounds, energy. Another place to put your attention, again, after you’ve practice with your breath for at least a week, is the light all around you. Just keep your eyes on one spot, and notice the light in the room you’re in. Another day, just focus on noticing sounds. Another day, try to notice the energy in the room all around you (including light and sounds).
Really commit yourself. Don’t just say, “Sure, I’ll try this for a couple days.” Really commit yourself to this. In your mind, be locked in, for at least a month.
You can do it anywhere. If you’re traveling or something comes up in the morning, you can do meditation in your office. In the park. During your commute. As you walk
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somewhere. Sitting meditation is the best place to start, but in truth, you’re practicing for this kind of mindfulness in your entire life.
Follow guided meditation. If it helps, you can try following guided meditations to start with. Peace Starter Meditation app has 7 short but effective guided meditation and it is amazing for beginner.
Check in with friends. While I like meditating alone, you can do it with your spouse or child or a friend. Or just make a commitment with a friend to check in every morning after meditation. It might help you stick with it for longer.
Listen Meditation Music. Listen to meditation music has many health benefits and it also help you to get more enjoy from meditation session. Just open your Peace Starter Meditation and listen to great music collection.
Smile when you’re done. When you’re finished with your two minutes, smile. Be grateful that you had this time to yourself that you stuck with your commitment, that you showed yourself that you’re trustworthy, where you took the time to get to know yourself and make friends with yourself. That’s an amazing two minutes of your life.
Meditation isn’t always easy or even peaceful. But it has truly amazing benefits, and you can start today, and continue for the rest of your life.
Did you know that Sharing involves cooperation, and cooperation has been essential to human
flourishing
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30 Days to Change Your Life
Now according to popular wisdom, it takes 30 days to make or break a habit and you will be
learning what it takes to create the life you want. Following workbooks are designed for you to
cultivate different qualities of awareness into your life so you can achieve mental and emotional
states of peace and happiness. If you commit to these challenges, I promise you will experience
dramatic positive shifts in your well-being, physical and emotional health, and your vitality.
30 Days to Happiness: Learn how to live in the present moment and experience true, long
lasting happiness, in under 5 minutes
30 Days of Stress Relief: For anxiety, panic attacks, stress, health anxiety, social anxiety,
confidence & self esteem
30 Days of Meditation: How to Meditate Deeply – Meditation Techniques to Relieve
Anxiety & Improve Your Health in 5 Minutes
30 Days to Gratitude: Learn how to appreciate all the good in your life and thereby create
even more of it with an attitude of gratitude
30 Days to Freedom: Learn how to always overcome resistance, take action, succeed every
day, and make changes that last.
30 Days of Affirmation: Learn Affirmations To Achieve Success, Self-Motivation And
Confidence In Your Life
Also you can enjoy our inspirational blog post.
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About the Author
Deniz Yalım is the founder of BayArt which is about Mindfulness Meditation for Relax,
Breathe, and Quality of Life to Reduce Stress, Anxiety and Depression.
Deniz Yalım is the founder of Peace Starter Meditation. With Peace Starter, the physiology
undergoes a change and every cell in the body is filled with more prana (energy). This results in
joy and enthusiasm as the level of prana in the body increases and the mind becomes fresh,
delicate and beautiful.
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Connect with Deniz Yalın
I really appreciate you reading my book! Feel free to share this uncopyrighted e-book. Here are
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