2013 am home study_lesson 2 - about anger

Lesson 2 - AngerLesson 2 - AngerAnger and its Impact

By George Anderson, MSW, LCSW, BCDwith contributions by John Elder, MA

Anderson and Anderson - Lesson 2 - About Anger2

Overview Overview Anger and stress are two factors that tend

to occur in an act of aggression toward another person.

Recognizing and improving skills in anger management, stress management, empathy and assertive communication are the keys to improving relationships with others.

All of these will be covered in this class.


VocabularyVocabulary Anger is a feeling of displeasure, which usually

shows itself in a desire to fight back at the supposed cause.

Stress is the mismatch between the demands made on us and our ability to meet those demands.

Emotional intelligence is the capacity to create positive outcomes in relationship to yourself and others.

Good communication skills requires two sets of skills: accurate receiving and accurate sending.


Anger Control LogAnger Control Log Briefly describe the incident

which resulted in your decision to take this class.

What did you want happen in this situation?

What caused you to think that your action would get the results your wanted?

What feelings were you having?

What was the impact of your action on you?

Did any past violence or aggression on your part affect this situation?

What could you have done differently?

Give an example.


Destructive InteractionsDestructive Interactions

Which of the following negative interactions best describe your behavior in the incident mentioned in your control log.

Inattention Intimidation Controlling Manipulation

Hostility Rage Avoidance Interrupting


Constructive InteractionsConstructive Interactions

Which of the following healthy interactions might you have used to improve the situation in your control log?

Active Listening Focusing Seeking Compromise Rephrasing

Expressing Feelings Stating Needs Assertiveness Honest Feedback


AngerAnger

Anyone can become angry – that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way – that is not easy.

– Aristotle


Anger and YouAnger and You

Which of Aristotle’s challenges do you have the most difficulty with? Being angry:

1. With the right person?2. To the right degree?3. At the right time?4. For the right purpose?5. In the right way?


Anger: What is it? What Causes it?Anger: What is it? What Causes it?

Anger is a reaction to an inner emotion and not a planned action.

Anger is a secondary emotion.Anger is learned.Anger is a normal human emotion.Anger is a problem when it is harmful to

you or someone else.


The Heavy Cost of AngerThe Heavy Cost of Anger

Here are five specific signals that will tell you when your anger is creating problems for you:

1. When it is too frequent.2. When it is too intense.3. When it lasts too long.4. When it leads to aggression.5. When it destroys work, school, or personal

relationships.


Anger Is an EnergizerAnger Is an EnergizerAnger sends signals to all parts of our

body to prepare us for a physical fight.Anger is a secondary emotion. A primary

emotion is what we feel just (often unconsciously) before we feel angry:– Identify the primary emotion.– Communicate your feelings.– Anger is often a response to fear.


Anger: A Powerful TeacherAnger: A Powerful Teacher

Anger is an intense emotion. It is evidence that we feel strongly about something. As with every emotion, it has a lesson for us.

It can teach us what we value, what we need, what we lack, what we believe and what our insecurities are.

It can help us become more aware of what we feel strongly about and which emotional needs are important to us.


Learning from AngerLearning from AngerOne way to learn from anger is shown in

the example below. Instead of saying: “She never should have done that. I can’t believe

how insensitive and inconsiderate she is. What a cold-hearted, evil person.”

Reframe your thoughts:“I wish she hadn’t done that. I feel ignored and

trifled with. How can I take care of my own emotional needs?”


SummarySummaryAnger is a basic secondary human emotion

that impacts the body and mind.When acted out inappropriately, anger can

be destructive.By paying attention to our anger we can

learn from it and develop deeper emotional intelligence.


ApplicationApplicationNotice how your anger impacts you and

your relationships.Become aware of how anger feels in your

body so that you can notice and manage it earlier.

Learn to learn from your anger instead of acting it out in destructive ways.


For More InformationFor More Information Other anger management sessions

– Lesson 3 – Basic Steps for Anger Management– Lesson 3 – Taking a Time Out– Lesson 3 – Keeping an Anger Log

Books– Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames, Thich Nhat

Hanh.– Letting Go of Anger, Ronald & Patricia Potter-Efron.


EvaluationEvaluation

1. Anger is a primary emotion. (T/F)

2. Our response to anger is learned. (T/F)3. Taking a time-out gives you time to plan your

attack on the other party. (T/F)4. Anger is a powerful teacher, it can teach us

what we value, what we need, what we lack. (T/F)


Evaluation - AnswersEvaluation - Answers1. Anger is a primary emotion.

FALSE: Anger is a secondary emotion, which is produced by a primary emotion such as fear, sadness, or frustration.

2. Our response to anger is learned. TRUE: We learn to act out our anger from family, friends, TV, and movies.

3. Taking a time-out gives you time to plan your attack on the other party. FALSE: A time-out is a time to cool down and calm down so that you can

resolve your conflict with the other party.

4. Anger is a powerful teacher, it can teach us what we value, what we need, what we lack.

TRUE: It can help us become more aware of what we feel strongly about and which emotional needs are important to us.

2013 am home study_lesson 2 - about anger

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