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Conflict Resolution

Sharon Parrott

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Agenda

• Introduction

• Icebreaker

• Understanding the nature of conflict

• The Win/Win Approach

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Ice Breaker

• Discuss desired outcomes

• Record on wall posters

• Revisit at the end of class

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Understanding Conflict

• Conflict is everywhere

• Do not avoid

• Handle in a productive manner

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Recalling Personal Experience of Conflict

• What does conflict mean to you?

• Is conflict a fight, a disagreement or war?

• What feelings do you have when conflict arises?

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Destructive Ways

• Tension• Unresolved problems• Stress• Low productivity • Sour relationships• Time off – sick• Health problems• Anxiety • Resentment

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Constructive Ways

• Relaxation• Openness• High productivity• Expanding friendly relationships• Vitality• Good health• Empowerment• A sense of achievement

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Levels of Conflict

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Crisis

ScreamingThrowing an objectNot talkingWalking off of the job

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Crisis

ScreamingThrowing an objectNot talkingWalking off of the job

DiscomfortUpset UnclearIrritated MisunderstandingSomething Wrong AnxiousNudge Negative attitudeTension

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• Stay Alert

• Choose the appropriate– Time– Opportunity– Option

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Break Time

• Return in 15 minutes

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The Win/Win Approach

• Types of behavior used in resolving conflict

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Conflict Behavior

• Some deal with the problem

• Others avoid it

• Some enhance relationships

• Others harm relationships

• Some solve the conflict

• Others increase it

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Reasons for Conflict Responses

• Habit

• Learned patterns

• Variations with mood, setting, relationship, significance of the conflict

• Belief system – for me to win someone must lose

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Fight Concept

• Screaming

• Physical violence

• Refusing to listen

• Manipulation

• Sulking

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Fight Behaviors

• I am right and you are wrong

• To blame and punish

• To threaten

• I am ok and you are not

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Flight Behaviors

• Sulking

• Crying

• Avoiding

• Pretending it has not happened

• Giving in

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Flight Behavior Intentions

• I am wrong and you are right

• To avoid conflict

• To maintain peace

• To let the other people win

• I am not ok and you are

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Flow Behaviors

• Discussing the issue

• Listening to others

• Taking time-out

• Explaining own perspective and needs

• Compromising

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Flow Behavior Intentions

• There must be a way to solve this

• To sort out the problem

• To respect others

• To make sure everyone is satisfied with the solution

• I am ok and you are ok

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Understanding Behavior

• Context

• Relationship of participants

• Culture

• Past history

• Future

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Fight, Flight, or Flow

• Punish

• Avoid conflict

• Deal with the Issue

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DiscussListen

Find out what each other wants/needs

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Win/Win Approach

• Needs first

• Solutions later

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The Win/Win Approach

• Compromise– Fair– Everyone shares– Everyone has some needs met

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Disadvantages to Compromising

• One party gives more

• Not all options explored

• Breed resentment

• Form of lose/lose

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Break Time

Return in 15 minutes

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Principles of Win/Win Approach

• Considering needs

• Concerned with fairness

• Respecting relationships

• No one loses

• Fulfilling needs

• Consulting with others

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Benefits to Win/Win Approach

• Productivity

• Creativity

• Quality

• Commitment

• Focus

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No Compromise

• Jobs

• Not worked hard enough

• Conflicting family functions

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Beginning conflict issues – were they answered?

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Finale

Thank you for attending!