VAMPIREACADEMY

byRichelleMead

One

IFELTHERFEARBEFOREIheardherscreams.Her nightmare pulsed intome, shakingme out ofmy own dream,which

hadhadsomethingtodowithabeachandsomehotguyrubbingsuntanoilonme. Images—hers, notmine— tumbled throughmymind: fire and blood, thesmell of smoke, the twistedmetal of a car. The pictureswrapped aroundme,suffocatingme,untilsomerationalpartofmybrainremindedmethatthiswasn'tmydream.

Iwokeup,strandsoflong,darkhairstickingtomyforehead.Lissalayinherbed,thrashingandscreaming.Iboltedoutofmine,quickly

crossingthefewfeetthatseparatedus."Liss,"Isaid,shakingher."Liss,wakeup.”Herscreamsdroppedoff,replacedbysoftwhimpers."Andre,"shemoaned.

"OhGod.”Ihelpedhersitup."Liss,youaren'tthereanymore.Wakeup.”After a fewmoments, her eyes fluttered open, and in the dim lighting, I

could see a flicker of consciousness start to take over. Her frantic breathingslowed,andsheleanedintome,restingherheadagainstmyshoulder. Iputanarmaroundherandranahandoverherhair.

"It'sokay,"Itoldhergently."Everything'sokay.”"Ihadthatdream.”"Yeah.Iknow.”Wesat likethatforseveralminutes,notsayinganythingelse.WhenIfelt

heremotionscalmdown,Ileanedovertothenightstandbetweenourbedsandturnedonthelamp.Itgloweddimly,butneitherofusreallyneededmuchtoseeby.Attractedbythelight,ourhousemate'scat,Oscar,leaptupontothesilloftheopen window He gave me a wide berth—animals don't like dhampirs, forwhatever reason—but jumpedonto thebedand rubbedhisheadagainstLissa,purring softly. Animals didn't have a problemwithMoroi, and they all lovedLissainparticular.Smiling,shescratchedhischin,andIfelthercalmfurther.

"Whendidwelastdoafeeding?"Iasked,studyingherface.Herfairskinwaspalerthanusual.Darkcircleshungunderhereyes,andtherewasanairoffrailtyabouther.Schoolhadbeenhecticthisweek,andIcouldn'trememberthelast time I'd given her blood. "It's been like…more than two days, hasn't it?Three?Whydidn'tyousayanything?”

Sheshruggedandwouldn'tmeetmyeyes."Youwerebusy.Ididn'twantto—”

"Screwthat,"Isaid,shiftingintoabetterposition.Nowondersheseemed

so weak. Oscar, not wanting me any closer, leapt down and returned to thewindow,wherehecouldwatchatasafedistance."Comeon.Let'sdothis.”

"Rose—”"Comeon.It'llmakeyoufeelbetter.”I tilted my head and tossed my hair back, baring my neck. I saw her

hesitate, but the sight ofmyneck andwhat it offered proved too powerful.Ahungry expression crossed her face, and her lips parted slightly, exposing thefangs she normally kept hidden while living among humans. Those fangscontrastedoddlywiththerestofherfeatures.Withherprettyfaceandpaleblondhair,shelookedmorelikeanangelthanavampire.

Asherteethnearedmybareskin,Ifeltmyheartracewithamixoffearandanticipation.Ialwayshatedfeelingthelatter,butitwasnothingIcouldhelp,aweaknessIcouldn'tshake.

Herfangsbitintome,hard,andIcriedoutatthebriefflareofpain.Thenitfaded,replacedbyawonderful,goldenjoythatspreadthroughmybody.Itwasbetter than any of the times I'd been drunk or high. Better than sex—or so Iimagined, since I'd never done it. It was a blanket of pure, refined pleasure,wrappingmeupandpromisingeverythingwouldberightintheworld.Onandon itwent.Thechemicals inher saliva triggeredanendorphin rush,and I losttrackoftheworld,losttrackofwhoIwas.

Then,regretfully,itwasover.Ithadtakenlessthanaminute.Shepulledback,wipingherhandacrossher lipsasshestudiedme."You

okay?”"I…yeah."Ilaybackonthebed,dizzyfromthebloodloss."Ijustneedto

sleepitoff.I'mfine.”Her pale, jade-green eyes watched me with concern. She stood up. "I'm

goingtogetyousomethingtoeat.”Myprotestscameawkwardlytomylips,andsheleftbeforeIcouldgetout

a sentence. The buzz from her bite had lessened as soon as she broke theconnection, but some of it still lingered inmy veins, and I felt a goofy smilecrossmylips.Turningmyhead,IglancedupatOscar,stillsittinginthewindow.

"Youdon'tknowwhatyou'remissing,"Itoldhim.Hisattentionwasonsomethingoutside.Hunkeringdownintoacrouch,he

puffedouthisjet-blackfur.Histailstartedtwitching.Mysmilefaded,andIforcedmyselftositup.Theworldspun,andIwaited

forittorightitselfbeforetryingtostand.WhenImanagedit,thedizzinesssetinagainandthis timerefusedto leave.Still, I feltokayenoughtostumble to thewindowandpeeroutwithOscar.Heeyedmewarily,scootedoveralittle,andthenreturnedtowhateverhadheldhisattention.

Awarmbreeze—unseasonablywarmforaPortlandfall—playedwithmyhairasIleanedout.Thestreetwasdarkandrelativelyquiet.Itwasthreeinthemorning, just about the only time a college campus settled down, at leastsomewhat.Thehouseinwhichwe'drentedaroomforthepasteightmonthssatonaresidentialstreetwithold,mismatchedhouses.Acrosstheroad,astreetlightflickered,nearlyreadytoburnout.Itstillcastenoughlightformetomakeouttheshapesofcarsandbuildings.Inourownyard,Icouldseethesilhouettesoftreesandbushes.

Andamanwatchingme.Ijerkedbackinsurprise.Afigurestoodbyatreeintheyard,aboutthirty

feetaway,wherehecouldeasilyseethroughthewindow.HewascloseenoughthatIprobablycouldhavethrownsomethingandhithim.HewascertainlycloseenoughthathecouldhaveseenwhatLissaandIhadjustdone.

The shadows covered him sowell that evenwithmy heightened sight, Icouldn'tmakeoutanyofhisfeatures,saveforhisheight.Hewastall.Reallytall.He stood there for just a moment, barely discernible, and then stepped back,disappearingintotheshadowscastbythetreesonthefarsideoftheyard.IwasprettysureIsawsomeoneelsemovenearbyandjoinhimbeforetheblacknessswallowedthemboth.

Whoever these figureswere,Oscardidn't like them.Not countingme,heusuallygotalongwithmostpeople,growingupsetonlywhensomeoneposedanimmediate danger.Theguyoutsidehadn't done anything threatening toOscar,butthecathadsensedsomething,somethingthatputhimonedge.

Somethingsimilartowhathealwayssensedinme.Icy fear raced throughme, almost—but not quite—eradicating the lovely

blissofLissa'sbite.Backingupfromthewindow,IjerkedonapairofjeansthatI found on the floor, nearly falling over in the process.Once theywere on, IgrabbedmycoatandLissa's, alongwithourwallets.Shovingmyfeet into thefirstshoesIsaw,Iheadedoutthedoor.

Downstairs, I found her in the cramped kitchen, rummaging through therefrigerator. One of our housemates, Jeremy, sat at the table, hand on hisforeheadashestaredsadlyatacalculusbook.Lissaregardedmewithsurprise.

"Youshouldn'tbeup.”"Wehavetogo.Now.”Hereyeswidened,andthenamomentlater,understandingclickedin."Are

you…really?Areyousure?”Inodded.Icouldn'texplainhowIknewforsure.Ijustdid.Jeremywatcheduscuriously."What'swrong?”Anideacametomind."Liss,gethiscarkeys.”

Helookedbackandforthbetweenus."Whatareyou—”Lissaunhesitatinglywalkedover tohim.Herfearpouredintomethrough

our psychic bond, but therewas something else too: her complete faith that Iwouldtakecareofeverything,thatwewouldbesafe.Likealways,IhopedIwasworthyofthatkindoftrust.

Shesmiledbroadlyandgazeddirectlyintohiseyes.Foramoment,Jeremyjust stared, still confused, and then I saw the thrall seizehim.Hiseyesglazedover,andheregardedheradoringly.

"Weneedtoborrowyourcar,"shesaidinagentlevoice."Whereareyourkeys?”

Hesmiled,andIshivered.Ihadahighresistancetocompulsion,butIcouldstill feel its effectswhen itwas directed at another person.That, and I'd beentaughtmyentirelifethatusingitwaswrong.Reachingintohispocket,Jeremyhandedoverasetofkeyshangingonalargeredkeychain.

"Thankyou,"saidLissa."Andwhereisitparked?”"Down the street," he said dreamily. "At the corner. By Brown." Four

blocksaway."Thankyou,"sherepeated,backingup."Assoonasweleave,Iwantyouto

gobacktostudying.Forgetyoueversawustonight.”Henoddedobligingly.Igottheimpressionhewouldhavewalkedoffacliff

forherrightthenifshe'dasked.Allhumansweresusceptibletocompulsion,butJeremyappearedweakerthanmost.Thatcameinhandyrightnow.

"Comeon,"Itoldher."We'vegottomove.”Westeppedoutside,headingtowardthecornerhe'dnamed.Iwasstilldizzy

fromthebiteandkeptstumbling,unabletomoveasquicklyasIwanted.Lissahadtocatchholdofmeafewtimestostopmefromfalling.Allthetime,thatanxietyrushedintomefromhermind.Itriedmybesttoignoreit;Ihadmyownfearstodealwith.

"Rose…whatarewegoingtodoiftheycatchus?"shewhispered."Theywon't,"Isaidfiercely."Iwon'tletthem.”"Butifthey'vefoundus—”"They foundusbefore.Theydidn'tcatchus then.We'll justdriveover to

thetrainstationandgotoL.A.They'lllosethetrail.”Imadeitsoundsimple.Ialwaysdid,eventhoughtherewasnothingsimple

aboutbeingontherunfromthepeoplewe'dgrownupwith.We'dbeendoingitfor twoyears, hidingwhereverwecould and just trying to finishhigh school.Oursenioryearhadjuststarted,andlivingonacollegecampushadseemedsafe.Weweresoclosetofreedom.

Shesaidnothingmore,andIfeltherfaithinmesurgeuponcemore.This

wasthewayithadalwaysbeenbetweenus.Iwastheonewhotookaction,whomade sure things happened— sometimes recklessly so. She was the morereasonableone,theonewhothoughtthingsoutandresearchedthemextensivelybefore acting.Both styles had their uses, but at themoment, recklessnesswascalledfor.Wedidn'thavetimetohesitate.

LissaandIhadbeenbestfriendseversincekindergarten,whenourteacherhad paired us together for writing lessons. Forcing five-year-olds to spellVasilisaDragomir andRosemarieHathawaywas beyond cruel, and we'd—orrather, I'd—responded appropriately. I'd chucked my book at our teacher andcalled her a fascist bastard. I hadn't known what those words meant, but I'dknownhowtohitamovingtarget.

LissaandIhadbeeninseparableeversince."Doyouhearthat?"sheaskedsuddenly.It tookmea fewseconds topickupwhathersharpersensesalreadyhad.

Footsteps,movingfast.Igrimaced.Wehadtwomoreblockstogo."We'vegottorunforit,"Isaid,catchingholdofherarm."Butyoucan't—”"Run.”It tookeveryounceofmywillpowernot topassouton thesidewalk.My

bodydidn'twanttorunafterlosingbloodorwhilestillmetabolizingtheeffectsofhersaliva.ButIorderedmymusclestostoptheirbitchingandclungtoLissaas our feet pounded against the concrete. Normally I could have outrun herwithoutanyextraeffort—particularlysinceshewasbarefoot—but tonight, shewasallthatheldmeupright.

Thepursuing footstepsgrew louder, closer.Black starsdancedbeforemyeyes.Aheadofus,IcouldmakeoutJeremy'sgreenHonda.OhGod,ifwecouldjustmakeit—

Tenfeetfromthecar,amansteppeddirectly intoourpath.Wecametoascreechinghalt,andIjerkedLissabackbyherarm.Itwashim,theguyI'dseenacrossthestreetwatchingme.Hewasolderthanus,maybemid-twenties,andastall as I'd figured, probably six-six or six-seven. And under differentcircumstances—say,whenhewasn'tholdingupourdesperateescape—Iwouldhave thought he was hot. Shoulder-length brown hair, tied back in a shortponytail.Darkbrowneyes.Alongbrowncoat—aduster,Ithoughtitwascalled.

Buthishotnesswasirrelevantnow.HewasonlyanobstaclekeepingLissaandmeawayfromthecarandourfreedom.Thefootstepsbehindusslowed,andIknewourpursuershadcaughtup.Offtothesides,Idetectedmoremovement,morepeopleclosing in.God.They'd sentalmostadozenguardians to retrieveus.Icouldn'tbelieveit.Thequeenherselfdidn'ttravelwiththatmany.

Panickedandnotentirelyincontrolofmyhigherreasoning,Iactedoutofinstinct. Ipressedup toLissa,keepingherbehindmeandaway from themanwhoappearedtobetheleader.

"Leaveheralone,"Igrowled."Don'ttouchher.”Hisfacewasunreadable,butheheldouthishandsinwhatwasapparently

supposedtobesomesortofcalminggesture, likeIwasarabidanimalhewasplanningtosedate.

"I'mnotgoingto—”Hetookastepforward.Tooclose.Iattackedhim, leapingout inanoffensivemaneuver Ihadn'tused in two

years,notsinceLissaandIhadrunaway.Themovewasstupid,anotherreactionbornofinstinctandfear.Anditwashopeless.Hewasaskilledguardian,notanovicewhohadn'tfinishedhistraining.Healsowasn'tweakandonthevergeofpassingout.

Andman,washefast.I'dforgottenhowfastguardianscouldbe,howtheycouldmoveandstrikelikecobras.Heknockedmeoffasthoughbrushingawayafly,andhishandsslammed intomeandsentmebackwards. Idon't thinkhemeanttostrikethathard—probablyjustintendedtokeepmeaway—butmylackof coordination interfered with my ability to respond. Unable to catch myfooting,Istartedtofall,headingstraighttowardthesidewalkatatwistedangle,hip-first.Itwasgoingtohurt.Alot.

Onlyitdidn't.Justasquicklyashe'dblockedme,themanreachedoutandcaughtmyarm,

keepingmeupright.WhenI'dsteadiedmyself,Inoticedhewasstaringatme—or,moreprecisely,atmyneck.Stilldisoriented,Ididn'tgetitrightaway.Then,slowly,myfreehandreacheduptothesideofmythroatandlightlytouchedthewoundLissahadmadeearlier.WhenIpulledmyfingersback,Isawslick,darkbloodonmyskin.Embarrassed,Ishookmyhairso that it fell forwardaroundmyface.Myhairwasthickandlongandcompletelycoveredmyneck.I'dgrownitoutforpreciselythisreason.

Theguy'sdarkeyeslingeredonthenow-coveredbiteamomentlongerandthenmetmine.Ireturnedhislookdefiantlyandquicklyjerkedoutofhishold.He let me go, though I knew he could have restrained me all night if he'dwanted.Fightingthenauseatingdizziness,IbackedtowardLissaagain,bracingmyselfforanotherattack.Suddenly,herhandcaughtholdofmine."Rose,"shesaidquietly."Don't.”

Her words had no effect on me at first, but calming thoughts graduallybegan to settle inmymind, comingacross through thebond. Itwasn't exactlycompulsion—shewouldn'tusethatonme—butitwaseffectual,aswasthefact

thatwewere hopelessly outnumbered and outclassed. Even I knew strugglingwouldbepointless.Thetensionleftmybody,andIsaggedindefeat.

Sensingmy resignation, themanstepped forward, turninghisattention toLissa.His facewas calm.He swept her a bow andmanaged to look gracefuldoing it, which surprised me considering his height. "My name is DimitriBelikov," he said. I could hear a faintRussian accent. "I've come to take youbacktoSt.Vladimir'sAcademy,Princess."

TWO

MY HATRED NOTWITHSTANDING, I HAD to admit Dimitri Beli-whateverwasprettysmart.After they'dcartedusoff to theairport toandontotheAcademy'sprivatejet,he'dtakenonelookat thetwoofuswhisperingandorderedusseparated.

"Don'tletthemtalktoeachother,"hewarnedtheguardianwhoescortedmeto the back of the plane. "Fiveminutes together, and they'll come upwith anescapeplan.”

Ishothimahaughtylookandstormedoffdowntheaisle.Nevermindthefactwehadbeenplanningescape.

Asitwas,thingsdidn'tlookgoodforourheroes—orheroines,rather.Oncewewereintheair,ouroddsofescapedroppedfurther.Evensupposingamiracleoccurred and I didmanage to take out all ten guardians, we'd sort of have aproblem in getting off the plane. I figured theymight have parachutes aboardsomewhere,but in theunlikelyeventI'dbeable tooperateone, therewasstillthat little issue of survival, seeing as we'd probably land somewhere in theRockyMountains.

No,weweren'tgettingoffthisplaneuntilitlandedinbackwoodsMontana.I'd have to think of something then, something that involved getting past theAcademy'smagicalwardsandtentimesasmanyguardians.Yeah.Noproblem.

AlthoughLissasatatthefrontwiththeRussianguy,herfearsangbacktome,pounding insidemyhead like ahammer.Myconcern forher cut intomyfury.Theycouldn'ttakeherbackthere,nottothatplace.IwonderedifDimitrimight have hesitated if he could feelwhat I did and if he knewwhat I knew.Probablynot.Hedidn'tcare.

As it was, her emotions grew so strong that for a moment, I had thedisorienting sensation of sitting in her seat—in her skin even. It happenedsometimes, and without much warning, she'd pull me right into her head.Dimitri'stallframesatbesideme,andmyhand—herhand—grippedabottleofwater. He leaned forward to pick up something, revealing six tiny symbolstattooedonthebackofhisneck:molnijamarks.Theylookedliketwostreaksofjagged lightning crossing in an X symbol. One for each Strigoi he'd killed.Above them was a twisting line, sort of like a snake, that marked him as aguardian.Thepromisemark.

Blinking, I fought against her and shifted back intomyownheadwith agrimace. I hatedwhen that happened.FeelingLissa's emotionswasone thing,butslippingintoherwassomethingwebothdespised.Shesawitasaninvasionof privacy, so I usually didn't tell her when it happened. Neither of us could

control it. It was another effect of the bond, a bond neither of us fullyunderstood. Legends existed about psychic links between guardians and theirMoroi, but the stories had never mentioned anything like this. We fumbledthroughitasbestwecould.

Near theendof the flight,Dimitriwalkedback towhere I sat and tradedplaces with the guardian beside me. I pointedly turned away, staring out thewindow absentmindedly Several moments of silence passed. Finally, he said,"Wereyoureallygoingtoattackallofus?”

Ididn'tanswer."Doing that…protecting her like that—it was very brave." He paused.

"Stupid,butstillbrave.Whydidyoueventryit?”Iglancedoverathim,brushingmyhairoutofmyfacesoIcouldlookhim

levellyintheeye."BecauseI'mherguardian."Iturnedbacktowardthewindow.Afteranotherquietmoment,hestoodupandreturnedtothefrontofthejet.Whenwelanded,LissaandIhadnochoicebuttoletthecommandosdrive

usout to theAcademy.Ourcarstoppedat thegate,andourdriverspokewithguardswhoverifiedweweren'tStrigoiabouttogooffonakillingspree.Afteraminute, they letuspasson through thewardsandup to theAcademyitself. Itwasaroundsunset—thestartofthevampiricday—andthecampuslaywrappedinshadows.

Itprobablylookedthesame,sprawlingandgothic.TheMoroiwerebigontradition;nothingeverchangedwiththem.Thisschoolwasn'tasoldastheonesback inEurope,but it hadbeenbuilt in the same style.Thebuildingsboastedelaborate, almost churchlike architecture, with high peaks and stone carvings.Wroughtirongatesenclosedsmallgardensanddoorwayshereandthere.Afterliving on a college campus, I had a new appreciation for just howmuch thisplaceresembledauniversitymorethanatypicalhighschool.

Wewereonthesecondarycampus,whichwasdividedintolowerandupperschools. Eachwas built around a large open quadrangle decoratedwith stonepathsandenormous,century-oldtrees.Weweregoingtowardtheupperschool'squad,whichhadacademicbuildingsononeside,whiledhampirdormitoriesandthegymsatopposite.Moroidorms satononeof theother ends, andoppositethem were the administrative buildings that also served the lower school.Youngerstudentslivedontheprimarycampus,farthertothewest.

Around all the campuseswas space, space, andmore space.Wewere inMontana,afterall,milesawayfromanyrealcity.Theairfeltcoolinmylungsand smelled of pine and wet, decaying leaves. Overgrown forests ringed theperimetersoftheAcademy,andduringtheday,youcouldseemountainsrisingupinthedistance.

As we walked into the main part of the upper school, I broke frommyguardianandranuptoDimitri.

"Hey,Comrade.”Hekeptwalkingandwouldn'tlookatme."Youwanttotalknow?"AreyoutakingustoKirova?”"HeadmistressKirova,"hecorrected.On theothersideofhim,Lissashot

mealookthatsaid,Don'tstartsomething."Headmistress.Whatever.She'sstillaself-righteousoldbit—”Mywords faded as the guardians led us through a set of doors—straight

intothecommons.Isighed.Werethesepeoplereallysocruel?Therehadtobeat least a dozenways to get toKirova's office, and theywere taking us rightthroughthecenterofthecommons.

Anditwasbreakfasttime.Noviceguardians—dhampirs likeme—andMoroi sat together,eatingand

socializing, faces alight with whatever current gossip held the Academy'sattention.Whenweentered,theloudbuzzofconversationstoppedinstantly,likesomeonehadflippedaswitch.Hundredsofsetsofeyesswiveledtowardus.

Ireturnedthestaresofmyformerclassmateswithalazygrin,tryingtogeta sense as towhether things had changed.Nope.Didn't seem like it. CamilleContastilllookedliketheprim,perfectlygroomedbitchIremembered,stilltheself-appointed leader of the Academy's royal Moroi cliques. Off to the side,Lissa's gawky near-cousin Natalie watched with wide eyes, as innocent andnaiveasbefore.

Andontheothersideoftheroom…well,thatwasinteresting.Aaron.Poor,poorAaron,who'dnodoubthadhisheartbrokenwhenLissaleft.Hestilllookedas cute as ever—maybe more so now—with those same golden looks thatcomplementedherssowell.Hiseyesfollowedhereverymove.Yes.Definitelynotoverher.Itwassad,really,becauseLissahadneverreallybeenallthatintohim.Ithinkshe'dgoneoutwithhimsimplybecauseitseemedliketheexpectedthingtodo.

Butwhat I foundmost interestingwas thatAaronhadapparently foundawaytopassthetimewithouther.Besidehim,holdinghishand,wasaMoroigirlwho looked about elevenbut had to be older, unless he'd become a pedophileduringourabsence.Withplumplittlecheeksandblondringlets,shelookedlikeaporcelaindoll.Averypissedoffandevilporcelaindoll.ShegrippedhishandtightlyandshotLissaalookofsuchburninghatredthatitstunnedme.Whatthehell was that all about? She was no one I knew. Just a jealous girlfriend, Iguessed.I'dbepissedtooifmyguywaswatchingsomeoneelselikethat.

Our walk of shame mercifully ended, though our new setting—

HeadmistressKirova'soffice—didn'treallyimprovethings.TheoldhaglookedexactlylikeIremembered,sharp-nosedandgray-haired.Shewastallandslim,likemostMoroi, and had always remindedme of a vulture. I knew her wellbecauseI'dspentalotoftimeinheroffice.

MostofourescortsleftusonceLissaandIwereseated,andIfelta littleless like a prisoner. Only Alberta, the captain of the school's guardians, andDimitri stayed. They took up positions along the wall, looking stoic andterrifying,justastheirjobdescriptionrequired.

Kirova fixed her angry eyes on us and opened hermouth to beginwhatwouldnodoubtbeamajorbitchsession.Adeep,gentlevoicestoppedher.

"Vasilisa.”Startled, I realized therewas someone else in the room. I hadn't noticed.

Carelessforaguardian,evenanoviceone.Withagreatdealofeffort,VictorDashkovrosefromacornerchair.Prince

VictorDashkov.Lissasprangupandrantohim,throwingherarmsaroundhisfrailbody.

"Uncle,"shewhispered.Shesoundedonthevergeoftearsasshetightenedhergrip.

Withasmallsmile,hegentlypattedherback."YouhavenoideahowgladIamtoseeyousafe,Vasilisa."Helookedtowardme."Andyoutoo,Rose.”

Inoddedback,tryingtohidehowshockedIwas.He'dbeensickwhenweleft,butthis—thiswashorrible.HewasNatalie'sfather,onlyaboutfortyorso,but he looked twice that age. Pale.Withered.Hands shaking.My heart brokewatchinghim.Withall thehorriblepeopleintheworld, itdidn'tseemfair thatthis guy should get a disease thatwas going to kill himyoung andultimatelykeephimfrombecomingking.

Although not technically her uncle—the Moroi used family terms veryloosely, especially the royals—Victorwas a close friend ofLissa's family andhadgoneoutofhiswaytohelpherafterherparentshaddied.I likedhim;hewasthefirstpersonIwashappytoseehere.

KirovaletthemhaveafewmoremomentsandthenstifflydrewLissabacktoherseat.

Timeforthelecture.Itwasagoodone—oneofKirova'sbest,whichwassayingsomething.She

wasamasterat them. I swear thatwas theonly reasonshe'dgone into schooladministration,becauseIhadyettoseeanyevidenceofheractuallylikingkids.The rant covered the usual topics: responsibility reckless behavior, self-centeredness.…Bleh. I immediately found myself spacing out, alternativelyponderingthelogisticsofescapingthroughthewindowinheroffice.

Butwhenthetiradeshiftedtome—well,thatwaswhenItunedbackin."You,MissHathaway,brokethemostsacredpromiseamongourkind:the

promise of a guardian to protect aMoroi. It is a great trust. A trust that youviolatedbyselfishlytakingtheprincessawayfromhere.TheStrigoiwouldlovetofinishofftheDragomirs;younearlyenabledthemtodoit.”

"Rose didn't kidnapme." Lissa spoke before I could, her voice and facecalm,despiteheruneasyfeelings."Iwantedtogo.Don'tblameher.”

Ms.Kirovatskedatusbothandpacedtheoffice,handsfoldedbehindhernarrowback.

"MissDragomir,youcouldhavebeentheonewhoorchestratedtheentireplan for all I know, but itwas stillher responsibility tomake sure you didn'tcarry it out. If she'ddoneherduty, shewouldhavenotified someone. If she'ddoneherduty,shewouldhavekeptyousafe.”

Isnapped."I did do my duty!" I shouted, jumping up from my chair. Dimitri and

AlbertabothflinchedbutleftmealonesinceIwasn'ttryingtohitanyone.Yet."Ididkeephersafe!Ikepthersafewhennoneofyou"—Imadeasweepinggesturearoundtheroom—"coulddoit.Itookherawaytoprotecther.IdidwhatIhadtodo.Youcertainlyweren'tgoingto.”

Throughthebond,I feltLissa trying tosendmecalmingmessages,againurgingmenottoletangergetthebestofme.Toolate.

Kirovastaredatme,herfaceblank."MissHathaway,forgivemeifIfailtosee the logic of how taking her out of a heavily guarded, magically securedenvironmentisprotectingher.Unlessthere'ssomethingyouaren'ttellingus?”

Ibitmylip."Isee.Well,then.Bymyestimation,theonlyreasonyouleft—asidefrom

the novelty of it, no doubt—was to avoid the consequences of that horrible,destructivestuntyoupulledjustbeforeyourdisappearance.”

"No,that'snot—”"And that only makes my decision that much easier. As a Moroi, the

princessmustcontinueonhereattheAcademyforherownsafety,butwehavenosuchobligationstoyou.Youwillbesentawayassoonaspossible.”

Mycockinessdriedup."I…what?”Lissastoodupbesideme."Youcan'tdothat!She'smyguardian.”"She is no such thing, particularly since she isn't even a guardian at all.

She'sstillanovice.”"Butmyparents—”"I knowwhat your parentswanted,God rest their souls, but things have

changed.MissHathaway is expendable. Shedoesn't deserve to be a guardian,

andshewillleave.”I stared atKirova,unable tobelievewhat Iwashearing. "Where areyou

going tosendme?TomymominNepal?DidsheevenknowIwasgone?Ormaybeyou'llsendmeofftomyfather?”

Her eyesnarrowed at thebite in that lastword.When I spoke again,myvoicewassocold,Ibarelyrecognizedit.

"Ormaybeyou'regoingtotrytosendmeofftobeabloodwhore.Trythat,andwe'llbegonebytheendoftheday.”

"MissHathaway,"shehissed,"youareoutofline.”"Theyhaveabond."Dimitri'slow,accentedvoicebroketheheavytension,

andweall turnedtowardhim.I thinkKirovahadforgottenhewasthere,butIhadn't.Hispresencewaswaytoopowerfultoignore.Hestillstoodagainstthewall,lookinglikesomesortofcowboysentryinthatridiculouslongcoatofhis.He looked at me, not Lissa, his dark eyes staring straight throughme. "RoseknowswhatVasilisaisfeeling.Don'tyou?”

I at least had the satisfaction of seeing Kirova caught off guard as sheglancedbetweenusandDimitri."No…that'simpossible.Thathasn'thappenedincenturies.”

"It'sobvious,"hesaid."IsuspectedassoonasIstartedwatchingthem.”NeitherLissanorIresponded,andIavertedmyeyesfromhis."That isagift,"murmuredVictor fromhiscorner. "A rare andwonderful

thing.”"Thebestguardiansalwayshadthatbond,”addedDimitri."Inthestories.”Kirova's outrage returned. "Stories that are centuries old," she exclaimed.

"Surely you aren't suggestingwe let her stay at theAcademy after everythingshe'sdone?”

Heshrugged."Shemightbewildanddisrespectful,butifshehaspotential—”

"Wild and disrespectful?" I interrupted. "Who the hell are you anyway?Outsourcedhelp?”

"GuardianBelikovistheprincess'sguardiannow,"saidKirova."Her

sanctionedguardian.”"YougotcheapforeignlabortoprotectLissa?”Thatwasprettymeanofmetosay—particularlysincemostMoroiandtheir

guardians were of Russian or Romanian descent—but the comment seemedcleverer at the time than it reallywas.And itwasn't like Iwas one to talk. Imight have been raised in the U.S., but my parents were foreign-born. Mydhampir mother was Scottish—red-haired, with a ridiculous accent—and I'dbeen toldmyMoroidadwasTurkish.Thatgeneticcombinationhadgivenmeskinthesamecolorastheinsideofanalmond,alongwithwhatIlikedtothinkweresemi-exoticdesert-princessfeatures:bigdarkeyesandhairsodeepbrownthatitusuallylookedblack.Iwouldn'thavemindedinheritingtheredhair,butwetakewhatweget.

Kirova threw her hands up in exasperation and turned to him. "You see?Completelyundisciplined!All thepsychicbondsandvery rawpotential in theworld can't make up for that. A guardian without discipline is worse than noguardian.”

"So teachher discipline.Classes just started.Put her back in andget hertrainingagain.”

"Impossible.She'llstillbehopelesslybehindherpeers.”"No,Iwon't,"Iargued.Noonelistenedtome."Thengiveherextratrainingsessions,"hesaid.Theycontinuedonwhiletherestofuswatchedtheexchangelikeitwasa

Ping-Ponggame.MypridewasstillhurtovertheeasewithwhichDimitrihadtrickedus,butitoccurredtomethathemightverywellkeepmeherewithLissa.Bettertostayatthishellholethanbewithouther.Throughourbond,Icouldfeelhertrickleofhope.

"Who'sgoingtoputintheextratime?"demandedKirova."You?”Dimitri'sargumentcametoanabruptstop."Well,that'snotwhatI—”Kirovacrossedherarmswithsatisfaction."Yes.That'swhatIthought.”Clearlyataloss,hefrowned.HiseyesflickedtowardLissaandme,andI

wonderedwhat he saw. Two pathetic girls, looking at himwith big, pleadingeyes?Ortworunawayswho'dbrokenoutofahigh-securityschoolandswipedhalfofLissa'sinheritance?

"Yes,"hesaidfinally."IcanmentorRose.I'llgiveherextrasessionsalongwithhernormalones.”

"Andthenwhat?"retortedKirovaangrily."Shegoesunpunished?”"Findsomeotherwaytopunishher,"answeredDimitri."Guardiannumbers

havegonedowntoomuchtorisklosinganother.Agirl,inparticular.”His unspoken words made me shudder, reminding me of my earlier

statementabout"bloodwhores."Fewdhampirgirlsbecameguardiansanymore.Victor suddenly spoke up from his corner. "I'm inclined to agree with

GuardianBelikov.SendingRoseawaywouldbeashame,awasteoftalent.”Ms.Kirovastaredoutherwindow. Itwascompletelyblackoutside.With

theAcademy'snocturnalschedule,morningandafternoonwere relative terms.That,andtheykeptthewindowstintedtoblockoutexcesslight.

Whensheturnedbackaround,Lissamethereyes."Please,Ms.Kirova.LetRosestay.”

Oh,Lissa,I thought.Becareful.UsingcompulsiononanotherMoroiwasdangerous—particularly in front ofwitnesses.ButLissawasonlyusing a tinybit, and we needed all the help we could get. Fortunately, no one seemed torealizewhatwashappening.

Idon'tevenknowifthecompulsionmadeadifference,butfinally,Kirovasighed.

"IfMissHathaway stays,here'show itwillbe."She turned tome. "Yourcontinued enrollment atSt.Vladimir's is strictlyprobationary.Stepout of lineonce, and you're gone. You will attend all classes and required trainings fornovices your age. You will also train with Guardian Belikov in every sparemoment you have—before and after classes. Other than that, you are bannedfrom all social activities, except meals, and will stay in your dorm. Fail tocomplywithanyofthis,andyouwillbesent…away.”

Igaveaharshlaugh."Bannedfromallsocialactivities?Areyoutryingtokeepusapart?"InoddedtowardLissa."Afraidwe'llrunawayagain?”

"I'm taking precautions.As I'm sure you recall, youwere never properlypunishedfordestroyingschoolproperty.Youhavealottomakeupfor."Herthinlipstightenedintoastraightline."Youarebeingofferedaverygenerousdeal.Isuggestyoudon'tletyourattitudeendangerit.”

Istartedtosayitwasn'tgenerousatall,butthenIcaughtDimitri'sgaze.Itwashard to read.Hemighthavebeen tellingmehebelieved inme.HemighthavebeentellingmeIwasanidiottokeepfightingwithKirova.Ididn'tknow.

Lookingawayfromhimforthesecondtimeduringthemeeting,Istaredatthefloor,consciousofLissabesidemeandherownencouragementburninginourbond.Atlonglast,Iexhaledandglancedbackupattheheadmistress.

"Fine.Iaccept."

Three

SENDINGUSSTRAIGHTTOCLASSafterourmeetingseemedbeyondcruel,butthat'sexactlywhatKirovadid.Lissawasledaway,andIwatchedhergo,gladthebondwouldallowmetokeepreadingheremotionaltemperature.

Theyactually sentme tooneof theguidancecounselors first.HewasanancientMoroi guy, one I remembered frombefore I'd left. I honestly couldn'tbelievehewasstillaround.Theguywassofreakingold,heshouldhaveretired.Ordied.

The visit took all of five minutes. He said nothing about my return andaskedafewquestionsaboutwhatclassesI'dtakeninChicagoandPortland.Hecompared thoseagainstmyold fileandhastilyscrawledoutanewschedule. Itookitsullenlyandheadedouttomyfirstclass.

1stPeriodAdvancedGuardianCombatTechniques2ndPeriodBodyguardTheoryandPersonalProtection3

3rdPeriodWeightTrainingandConditioning4thPeriodSeniorLanguageArts(Novices)—Lunch—5thPeriodAnimalBehaviorandPhysiology6thPeriodPre-calculus7thPeriodMoroiCulture48thPeriodSlavicArt

Ugh. I'd forgotten how long theAcademy's school daywas.Novices andMoroi took separate classes during the first half of the day, which meant Iwouldn't seeLissauntil after lunch—ifwehadanyafternoonclasses together.Mostofthemwerestandardseniorclasses,soIfeltmyoddswereprettygood.Slavicart struckmeas thekindofelectivenoonesignedup for, sohopefullythey'dstuckherintheretoo.

Dimitri and Alberta escorted me to the guardians' gym for first period,neither one acknowledging my existence. Walking behind them, I saw howAlbertawore her hair in a short, pixie cut that showed her promisemark andmolnijamarks.A lotof femaleguardiansdid this. Itdidn'tmattersomuchformenow,sincemyneckhadnotattoosyet,butIdidn'twanttoevercutmyhair.

SheandDimitrididn'tsayanythingandwalkedalongalmostlikeitwasanyotherday.Whenwearrived,thereactionsofmypeersindicateditwasanythingbut.Theywere in themiddleofsettingupwhenweentered thegym,and justlikeinthecommons,alleyesfellonme.Icouldn'tdecideifIfeltlikearockstaroracircusfreak.

Allright,then.IfIwasgoingtobestuckhereforawhile,Iwasn'tgoingtoactafraidof themallanymore.LissaandIhadonceheldthisschool'srespect,anditwastimetoremindeveryoneofthat.Scanningthestaring,openmouthednovices, I lookedforafamiliar face.Mostof themwereguys.Onecaughtmyeye,andIcouldbarelyholdbackmygrin.

"HeyMason,wipethedrooloffyourface.Ifyou'regoingtothinkaboutmenaked,doitonyourowntime.”

A few snorts and snickers broke the awed silence, and Mason Ashfordsnappedoutofhishaze,givingmealopsidedsmile.Withredhairthatstuckupeverywhere and a smattering of freckles, he was nice-looking, though notexactlyhot.HewasalsooneofthefunniestguysIknew.We'dbeengoodfriendsbackintheday.

"Thisismytime,Hathaway.I'mleadingtoday'ssession.”"Ohyeah?"Iretorted."Huh.Well,Iguessthisisagoodtimetothinkabout

menaked,then.”"It's always a good a time to think about you naked," added someone

nearby,breakingthetensionfurther.EddieCastile.Anotherfriendofmine.Dimitrishookhisheadandwalkedoff,mutteringsomethinginRussianthat

didn'tsoundcomplimentary.Butasforme…well,justlikethat,Iwasoneofthenovices again. They were an easygoing bunch, less focused on pedigree andpoliticsthantheMoroistudents.

The class engulfedme, and I foundmyself laughing and seeing those I'dnearlyforgottenabout.Everyonewantedtoknowwherewe'dbeen;apparentlyLissaandIhadbecomelegends.Icouldn'ttellthemwhywe'dleft,ofcourse,soI offered up a lot of taunts andwouldn't-you-like-to-knows that served just aswell.

The happy reunion lasted a fewmore minutes before the adult guardianwho oversaw the training came over and scolded Mason for neglecting hisduties. Still grinning, he barked out orders to everyone, explaining whatexercisestostartwith.UneasilyIrealizedIdidn'tknowmostofthem.

"Come on,Hathaway," he said, takingmy arm. "You can bemy partner.Let'sseewhatyou'vebeendoingallthistime.”

Anhourlater,hehadhisanswer."Notpracticing,huh?”"Ow,"Igroaned,momentarilyincapableofnormalspeech.Heextendedahandandhelpedmeupfromthemathe'dknockedmedown

on—aboutfiftytimes."Ihateyou,"Itoldhim,rubbingaspotonmythighthatwasgoingtohavea

wickedbruisetomorrow."You'dhatememoreifIheldback.”"Yeah,that'strue,"Iagreed,staggeringalongastheclassputtheequipment

back."Youactuallydidokay.”"What?Ijusthadmyasshandedtome.”"Well,ofcourseyoudid.It'sbeentwoyears.Buthey,you'restillwalking.

That'ssomething."Hegrinnedmockingly."DidImentionIhateyou?”He flashed me another smile, which quickly faded to something more

serious."Don'ttakethisthewrongway.…Imean,youreallyareascrapper,butthere'snowayyou'llbeabletotakeyourtrialsinthespring—”

"They'remakingme take extrapractice sessions," I explained.Not that itmattered. IplannedongettingLissaandmeoutofherebefore thesepracticesreallybecameanissue."I'llbeready.”

"Extrasessionswithwho?”"Thattallguy.Dimitri.”Masonstoppedwalkingandstaredatme."You'reputtinginextratimewith

Belikov?”"Yeah,sowhat?”"Sothemanisagod.”"Exaggeratemuch?"Iasked."No,I'mserious.Imean,he'sallquietandantisocialusually,butwhenhe

fights…wow.Ifyouthinkyou'rehurtingnow,you'regoingtobedeadwhenhe'sdonewithyou.”

Great.Somethingelsetoimprovemyday.I elbowed him and went on to second period. That class covered the

essentialsofbeingabodyguardandwasrequiredforallseniors.Actually,itwasthethirdinaseriesthathadstartedjunioryear.ThatmeantIwasbehindinthisclass too, but I hoped protecting Lissa in the real world had given me someinsight.

OurinstructorwasStanAlto,whomwereferredtosimplyas"Stan"behindhis back and "Guardian Alto" in formal settings. He was a little older thanDimitri,butnotnearlyastall,andhealwayslookedpissedoff.Today,thatlookintensifiedwhenhewalkedintotheclassroomandsawmesittingthere.Hiseyeswidenedinmocksurpriseashecircled theroomandcametostandbesidemydesk.

"What's this? No one told me we had a guest speaker here today. RoseHathaway.Whataprivilege!Howverygenerousofyoutotaketimeoutofyourbusyscheduleandshareyourknowledgewithus.”

I felt my cheeks burning, but in a great show of self-control, I stoppedmyselffromtellinghimtofuckoff.I'mprettysuremyfacemusthavedeliveredthatmessage,however,becausehissneerincreased.Hegesturedformetostandup.

"Well,comeon,comeon.Don'tsitthere!Comeuptothefrontsoyoucanhelpmelecturetheclass.”

Isankintomyseat."Youdon'treallymean—”Thetauntingsmiledriedup."Imeanexactlywhat Isay,Hathaway.Go to

thefrontoftheclass.”Athicksilenceenvelopedtheroom.Stanwasascaryinstructor,andmost

oftheclasswastooawedtolaughatmydisgracequiteyet.Refusingtocrack,Istrodeuptothefrontoftheroomandturnedtofacetheclass.Igavethemaboldlookand tossedmyhair overmy shoulders, earning a few sympathetic smilesfrommy friends. I then noticed I had a larger audience than expected.A few

guardians—including Dimitri—lingered in the back of the room. Outside theAcademy,guardiansfocusedonone-on-oneprotection.Here,guardianshadalotmorepeopletoprotectandtheyhadto train thenovices.Sorather thanfollowanyonepersonaround, theyworkedshiftsguardingtheschoolasawholeandmonitoringclasses.

"So,Hathaway,"saidStancheerfully,strollingbackuptothefrontwithme."Enlightenusaboutyourprotectivetechniques.”

"My…techniques?”"Ofcourse.Becausepresumablyyoumusthavehadsomesortofplanthe

restofuscouldn'tunderstandwhenyoutookanunderageMoroiroyaloutoftheAcademyandexposedhertoconstantStrigoithreats.”

ItwastheKirovalecturealloveragain,exceptwithmorewitnesses."WeneverranintoanyStrigoi,"Irepliedstiffly."Obviously,"he saidwith a snicker. "I already figured that out, seeing as

howyou'restillalive.”I wanted to shout that maybe I could have defeated a Strigoi, but after

getting beat up in the last class, I now suspected I couldn't have survived anattackbyMason,letaloneanactualStrigoi.

WhenIdidn'tsayanything,Stanstartedpacinginfrontoftheclass."Sowhat'dyoudo?How'dyoumakesureshestayedsafe?Didyouavoid

goingoutatnight?”"Sometimes." That was true—especially when we'd first run away.We'd

relaxedalittleaftermonthswentbywithnoattacks."Sometimes,"herepeatedinahigh-pitchedvoice,makingmyanswersound

incrediblystupid."Wellthen,Isupposeyousleptduringthedayandstayedonguardatnight.”

"Er…no.”"No? But that's one of the first things mentioned in the chapter on solo

guarding.Ohwait,youwouldn'tknowthatbecauseyouweren'there.”I swallowed back more swear words. "I watched the area whenever we

wentout,"Isaid,needingtodefendmyself."Oh?Wellthat'ssomething.DidyouuseCarnegie'sQuadrantSurveillance

MethodortheRotationalSurvey?”Ididn'tsayanything."Ah. I'm guessing you used the Hathaway Glance-Around-When-You-

Remember-ToMethod.”"No!"Iexclaimedangrily."That'snottrue.Iwatchedher.She'sstillalive,

isn'tshe?”Hewalked back up tome and leaned towardmy face. "Because you got

lucky.”"Strigoiaren'tlurkingaroundeverycorneroutthere,"Ishotback."It'snot

likewhatwe'vebeentaught.It'ssaferthanyouguysmakeitsound.”"Safer?Safer?We are at war with the Strigoi!" he yelled. I could smell

coffeeonhisbreath,hewassoclose."Oneofthemcouldwalkrightuptoyouandsnapyourpretty littleneckbeforeyouevennoticedhim—andhe'dbarelybreakasweatdoingit.YoumighthavemorespeedandstrengththanaMoroiorahuman,butyouarenothing,nothing,comparedtoaStrigoi.Theyaredeadly,andtheyarepowerful.Anddoyouknowwhatmakesthemmorepowerful?”

NowaywasIgoingtoletthisjerkmakemecry.Lookingawayfromhim,Itried to focus on something else. My eyes rested on Dimitri and the otherguardians.Theywerewatchingmyhumiliation,stone-faced.

"Moroiblood,"Iwhispered."Whatwasthat?"askedStanloudly."Ididn'tcatchit.”I spunback around to facehim. "Moroi blood!Moroi bloodmakes them

stronger.”Henoddedinsatisfactionandtookafewstepsback."Yes.Itdoes.Itmakes

them stronger and harder to destroy. They'll kill and drink from a human ordhampir, but they want Moroi blood more than anything else. They seek it.They've turned to the dark side to gain immortality, and they want to dowhatever they can to keep that immortality. Desperate Strigoi have attackedMoroiinpublic.GroupsofStrigoihaveraidedacademiesexactlylikethisone.ThereareStrigoiwhohavelivedforthousandsofyearsandfedoffgenerationsofMoroi.They'realmostimpossibletokill.AndthatiswhyMoroinumbersaredropping. They aren't strong enough—even with guardians— to protectthemselves.SomeMoroi don't even see thepoint of running anymore and aresimplyturningStrigoibychoice.AndastheMoroidisappear…”

"…sodothedhampirs,"Ifinished."Well,"hesaid,lickingsprayedspitoffhislips."Itlookslikeyoulearned

somethingafterall.Nowwe'llhavetoseeifyoucanlearnenoughtopassthisclassandqualifyforyourfieldexperiencenextsemester.”

Ouch. I spent the rest of that horrible class—in my seat, thankfully—replayingthoselastwordsinmymind.Thesenior-yearfieldexperiencewasthebest part of a novice's education. We'd have no classes for half a semester.Instead,we'deachbeassignedaMoroistudenttoguardandfollowaround.Theadult guardians would monitor us and test us with staged attacks and otherthreats.Howanovicepassedthatfieldexperiencewasalmostasimportantasalltherestofhergradescombined.ItcouldinfluencewhichMoroishegotassignedtoaftergraduation.

Andme?TherewasonlyoneMoroiIwanted.

Twoclasses later, I finallyearnedmy lunchescape.As I stumbledacrosscampus toward the commons, Dimitri fell into step beside me, not lookingparticularlygodlike—unlessyoucountedhisgodlygoodlooks.

"IsupposeyousawwhathappenedinStan'sclass?"Iasked,notbotheringwithtitles.

"Yes.”"Andyoudon'tthinkthatwasunfair?”"Washeright?DoyouthinkyouwerefullypreparedtoprotectVasilisa?”Ilookeddownattheground."Ikeptheralive,"Imumbled."Howdidyoudofightingagainstyourclassmatestoday?”Thequestionwasmean.Ididn'tanswerandknewIdidn'tneedto.I'dhad

anothertrainingclassafterStan's,andnodoubtDimitrihadwatchedmegetbeatuptheretoo.

"Ifyoucan'tfightthem—”"Yeah,yeah,Iknow,"Isnapped.Heslowedhislongstridetomatchmypain-filledone."You'restrongand

fastbynature.Youjustneedtokeepyourselftrained.Didn'tyouplayanysportswhileyouweregone?”

"Sure,"Ishrugged."Nowandthen.”"Youdidn'tjoinanyteams?”"Toomuchwork.IfI'dwantedtopracticethatmuch,I'dhavestayedhere.”Hegavemeanexasperatedlook."You'llneverbeabletoreallyprotectthe

princessifyoudon'thoneyourskills.You'llalwaysbelacking.”"I'llbeabletoprotecther,"Isaidfiercely."You have no guarantees of being assigned to her, you know—for your

field experience or after you graduate." Dimitri's voice was low andunapologetic.Theyhadn'tgivenmeawarmandfuzzymentor."Noonewantstowastethebond—butnoone'sgoingtogiveheraninadequateguardianeither.Ifyouwant tobewithher, thenyouneed toworkfor it.Youhaveyour lessons.Youhaveme.Useusordon't.You'reanidealchoicetoguardVasilisawhenyoubothgraduate—ifyoucanproveyou'reworthy.Ihopeyouwill.”

"Lissa, call her Lissa," I corrected. She hated her full name, muchpreferringtheAmericanizednickname.

Hewalkedaway,andsuddenly,Ididn'tfeellikesuchabadassanymore.Bynow,I'dburnedupalotoftimeleavingclass.Mosteveryoneelsehad

longsincesprintedinsidethecommonsforlunch,eagertomaximizetheirsocial

time. I'd almost made it back there myself when a voice under the door'soverhangcalledtome.

"Rose?”Peeringinthevoice'sdirection,IcaughtsightofVictorDashkov,hiskind

face smiling at me as he leaned on a cane near the building's wall. His twoguardiansstoodnearbyatapolitedistance.

"Mr.Dash—er,YourHighness.Hi.”Icaughtmyself just in time,havingnearly forgottenMoroi royal terms. I

hadn'tusedthemwhilelivingamonghumans.TheMoroichosetheirrulersfromamongtwelveroyalfamilies.Theeldestinthefamilygotthetitleof"prince"or"princess."Lissahadgottenhersbecauseshewastheonlyoneleftinherline.

"Howwasyourfirstday?"heasked."Not over yet." I tried to think of something conversational. "Are you

visitinghereforawhile?”"I'll be leaving this afternoon after I say hello to Natalie.When I heard

Vasilisa—andyou—hadreturned,Isimplyhadtocomeseeyou.”Inodded,notsurewhatelsetosay.HewasmoreLissa'sfriendthanmine."Iwanted to tellyou…"Hespokehesitantly. "Iunderstand thegravityof

whatyoudid,butIthinkHeadmistressKirovafailedtoacknowledgesomething.YoudidkeepVasilisasafeallthistime.Thatisimpressive.”

"Well,it'snotlikeIfaceddownStrigoioranything,"Isaid."Butyoufaceddownsomethings?”"Sure.Theschoolsentpsi-houndsonce.”"Remarkable.”"Notreally.Avoidingthemwasprettyeasy.”Helaughed."I'vehuntedwiththembefore.Theyaren'tthateasytoevade,

not with their powers and intelligence." It was true. Psi-hounds were one ofmanytypesofmagicalcreaturesthatwanderedtheworld,creaturesthathumansneverknewaboutorelsedidn'tbelievethey'dreallyseen.Thehoundstraveledinpacksandsharedasortofpsychiccommunicationthatmadethemparticularlydeadly to their prey—asdid the fact that they resembledmutantwolves. "Didyoufaceanythingelse?”

Ishrugged."Littlethingshereandthere.”"Remarkable,"herepeated."Lucky, I think. It turnsout I'mreallybehind inall thisguardianstuff." I

soundedjustlikeStannow."You'reasmartgirl.You'llcatchup.Andyoualsohaveyourbond.”Ilookedaway.Myabilityto"feel"Lissahadbeensuchasecretforsolong,

itfeltweirdtohaveothersknowaboutit.

"The histories are full of stories of guardians who could feel when theirchargeswereindanger,"Victorcontinued.

"I'vemadeahobbyofstudyinguponitandsomeoftheancientways.I'veheardit'satremendousasset.”

"I guess." I shrugged.What a boring hobby, I thought, imagining himporingoverprehistorichistoriesinsomedanklibrarycoveredinspiderwebs.

Victortiltedhishead,curiosityalloverhisface.Kirovaandtheothershadhadthesamelookwhenwe'dmentionedourconnection,likewewerelabrats."Whatisitlike—ifyoudon'tmindmeasking?”

"It's…Idon't know. I just sortof alwayshave thishumofhowshe feels.Usuallyit'sjustemotions.Wecan'tsendmessagesoranything."Ididn'ttellhimaboutslippingintoherhead.Thatpartofitwashardevenformetounderstand.

"Butitdoesn'tworktheotherway?Shedoesn'tsenseyou?”Ishookmyhead.Hisfaceshonewithwonder."Howdidithappen?”"Idon'tknow,"Isaid,stillglancingaway."Juststartedtwoyearsago.”Hefrowned."Nearthetimeoftheaccident?”Hesitantly, I nodded. The accident was not something I wanted to talk

about, that was for sure. Lissa'smemorieswere bad enoughwithoutmy ownmixingintothem.Twistedmetal.Asensationofhot, thencold,thenhotagain.Lissa screaming over me, screaming for me to wake up, screaming for herparentsandherbrothertowakeup.Noneofthemhad,onlyme.

Andthedoctorssaidthatwasamiracleinitself.TheysaidIshouldn'thavesurvived.

Apparentlysensingmydiscomfort,Victorletthemomentgoandreturnedtohisearlierexcitement.

"Icanstillbarelybelievethis.It'sbeensolongsincethishashappened.Ifitdidhappenmoreoften…justthinkwhatitcoulddoforthesafetyofallMoroi.Ifonlyotherscouldexperiencethistoo.I'llhavetodomoreresearchandseeifwecanreplicateitwithothers.”

"Yeah." I was getting impatient, despite how much I liked him. Natalierambleda lot, and itwaspretty clearwhichparent she'd inherited thatqualityfrom. Lunch was ticking down, and although Moroi and novices sharedafternoonclasses,LissaandIwouldn'thavemuchtimetotalk.

"Perhapswecould—"Hestartedcoughing,agreat,seizingfitthatmadehiswhole body shake. His disease, Sandovsky's Syndrome, took the lungs downwith it while dragging the body toward death. I cast an anxious look at hisguardians,andoneofthemsteppedforward."YourHighness,"hesaidpolitely,"youneedtogoinside.It'stoocoldouthere.”

Victornodded."Yes,yes.AndI'msureRoseherewantstoeat."Heturnedtome."Thankyouforspeakingtome.Ican'temphasizehowmuchitmeanstomethatVasilisaissafe—andthatyouhelpedwiththat.I'dpromisedherfatherI'd look after her if anythinghappened tohim, and I felt likequite the failurewhenyouleft.”

AsinkingsensationfilledmystomachasIimaginedhimwrackedwithguiltandworryoverourdisappearance.Untilnow,Ihadn'treallythoughtabouthowothersmighthavefeltaboutusleaving.

Wemadeourgoodbyes,andIfinallyarrivedinsidetheschool.AsIdid,IfeltLissa'sanxietyspike.Ignoringthepaininmylegs,Ipickedupmypaceintothecommons.

Andnearlyranrightintoher.Shedidn'tseeme,though.Neitherdidthepeoplestandingwithher:Aaron

and that little doll girl. I stopped and listened, just catching the end of theconversation. The girl leaned toward Lissa, who seemed more stunned thananythingelse.

"It looks to me like it came from a garage sale. I thought a preciousDragomirwouldhavestandards."ScorndrippedoffthewordDragomir.

GrabbingDollGirlbytheshoulder,Ijerkedheraway.Shewassolight,shestumbledthreefeetandnearlyfell.

"She does have standards," I said, "which is why you're done talking toher."

FOUR

WE DIDN'T HAVE THE ENTIRE commons' attention this time, thankGod,butafewpassingpeoplehadstoppedtostare.

"Whatthehelldoyouthinkyou'redoing?"askedDollGirl,blueeyeswideandsparklingwithfury.Upclosenow,Iwasabletogetabetterlookather.ShehadthesameslimbuildasmostMoroibutnottheusualheight,whichwaspartlywhatmadeherlooksoyoung.Thetinypurpledresssheworewasgorgeous—reminding me that I was indeed dressed in thrift-shop wear—but closerinspectionledmetothinkitwasadesignerknockoff.

I crossed my arms across my chest. "Are you lost, little girl? Theelementaryschool'soveronwestcampus.”

Apinkflushspreadoverhercheeks."Don'tyouevertouchmeagain.Youscrewwithme,andI'llscrewyourightback.”

Ohman,whatanopeningthatwas.OnlyaheadshakefromLissastoppedme from unleashing any number of hilarious comebacks. Instead, I opted forsimplebruteforce,sotospeak.

"Andifyoumesswitheitherofusagain,I'llbreakyouinhalf.Ifyoudon'tbelieveme,goaskDawnYarrowaboutwhatIdidtoherarminninthgrade.Youwereprobablyatnaptimewhenithappened.”

TheincidentwithDawnhadn'tbeenoneofmyfinermoments. Ihonestlyhadn't expected to break any bones when I shoved her into a tree. Still, theincidenthadgivenmeadangerous reputation, inaddition tomysmartassone.The story had gained legendary status, and I liked to imagine that itwas stillbeing told around campfires late at night. Judging from the look on this girl'sface,itwas.

One of the patrolling staff members strolled by right then, castingsuspiciouseyesatour littlemeeting.DollGirlbackedoff, takingAaron'sarm."Comeon,"shesaid.

"Hey,Aaron," I said cheerfully, remembering hewas there. "Nice to seeyouagain.”

Hegavemeaquicknodandanuneasysmile,justasthegirldraggedhimoff.SameoldAaron.Hemightbeniceandcute,butaggressivehewasnot.

IturnedtoLissa."Youokay?"Shenodded."AnyideawhoIjustthreatenedtobeatup?”

"Notaclue."Istartedtoleadhertowardthelunchline,butsheshookherheadatme."Gottagoseethefeeders.”

A funny feeling settled overme. I'd gotten so used to being her primarybloodsourcethatthethoughtofreturningtotheMoroi'snormalroutineseemed

strange. In fact, it almost botheredme. It shouldn't have.Daily feedingswerepartofaMoroi'slife,somethingIhadn'tbeenabletoofferherwhilelivingonourown.Ithadbeenaninconvenientsituation,onethatleftmeweakonfeedingdaysandherweakonthedaysinbetween.Ishouldhavebeenhappyshewouldgetsomenormality.

Iforcedasmile."Sure.”Wewalkedintothefeedingroom,whichsatadjacenttothecafeteria.Itwas

setupwithsmallcubicles,dividingtheroom'sspaceinanefforttoofferprivacy.Adark-hairedMoroiwomangreetedusattheentranceandglanceddownatherclipboard,flippingthroughthepages.Findingwhatsheneeded,shemadeafewnotesandthengesturedforLissatofollow.Meshegaveapuzzledlook,butshedidn'tstopmefromentering.

She ledus tooneof thecubicleswhereaplump,middle-agedwomansatleafing throughamagazine.She lookedupatourapproachandsmiled. Inhereyes,Icouldseethedreamy,glazed-overlookmostfeedershad.She'dprobablynearedherquotafortheday,judgingfromhowhighsheappearedtobe.

RecognizingLissa,hersmilegrew."Welcomeback,Princess.”The greeter left us, andLissa sat down in the chair beside thewoman. I

senseda feelingofdiscomfort inher,a littledifferent frommyown.Thiswasweird for her too; it had been a long time. The feeder, however, had no suchreservations.Aneagerlookcrossedherface—thelookofajunkieabouttogethernextfix.

Disgustpouredintome.Itwasanoldinstinct,onethathadbeendrilledinover the years. Feeders were essential toMoroi life. Theywere humans whowillinglyvolunteered tobearegularbloodsource,humansfromthefringesofsocietywhogave their livesover to the secretworldof theMoroi.Theywerewellcaredforandgivenallthecomfortstheycouldneed.Butattheheartofit,theyweredrugusers,addicts toMoroisalivaandtherushitofferedwitheachbite.TheMoroi—andguardians—lookeddownonthisdependency,eventhoughtheMoroi couldn't have survivedotherwiseunless they tookvictimsby force.Hypocrisyatitsfinest.

The feeder tilted her head, givingLissa full access to her neck.Her skintherewasmarkedwithscarsfromyearsofdailybites.TheinfrequentfeedingsLissaandIhaddonehadkeptmyneckclear;mybitemarksneverlastedmorethanadayorso.

Lissa leaned forward, fangs biting into the feeder's yielding flesh. Thewomanclosedhereyes,makingasoftsoundofpleasure.Iswallowed,watchingLissadrink.Icouldn'tseeanyblood,butIcouldimagineit.Asurgeofemotiongrew in my chest: longing. Jealousy. I averted my eyes, staring at the floor.

Mentally,Iscoldedmyself.What'swrongwithyou?Whyshouldyoumissit?Youonlydiditonceevery

day.Youaren'taddicted,notlikethis.Andyoudon'twanttobe.ButIcouldn'thelpmyself,couldn'thelpthewayIfeltasIrecalledthebliss

andrushofavampire'sbite.Lissafinishedandwereturnedto thecommons,movingtoward the lunch

line. Itwasshort, sinceweonlyhad fifteenminutes left,and I strolledupandbegantoloadmyplatewithfrenchfriesandsomerounded,bite-sizeobjectsthatlookedvaguelylikechickennuggets.Lissaonlygrabbedayogurt.Moroineededfood, as dhampirs and humans did, but rarely had an appetite after drinkingblood.

"Sohow'dclassesgo?"Iasked.Sheshrugged.Herfacewasbrightwithcolorandlifenow."Okay.Lotsof

stares.Alotofstares.Lotsofquestionsaboutwherewewere.Whispering.”"Samehere,"Isaid.Theattendantcheckedusout,andwewalkedtoward

the tables. I gave Lissa a sidelong glance. "You okay with that? They aren'tbotheringyou,arethey?”

"No—it's fine." The emotions coming through the bond contradicted herwords.KnowingIcouldfeelthat,shetriedtochangethesubjectbyhandingmeherclassschedule.Ilookeditover.

1stPeriodRussian22ndPeriodAmericanColonialLiterature3rdPeriodBasicsofElementalControl4thPeriodAncientPoetry—Lunch—5thPeriodAnimalBehaviorandPhysiology6thPeriodAdvancedCalculus7thPeriodMoroiCulture48thPeriodSlavicArt

"Nerd," I said. "If youwere inStupidMath likeme,we'd have the sameafternoon schedule." I stopped walking. "Why are you in elemental basics?That'sasophomoreclass.”

Sheeyedme."Becauseseniorstakespecializedclasses.”Wefellsilentatthat.AllMoroiwieldedelementalmagic.Itwasoneofthe

thingsthatdifferentiatedlivingvampiresfromStrigoi,thedeadvampires.Moroi

viewedmagic as a gift. It was part of their souls and connected them to theworld.

Alongtimeago,theyhadusedtheirmagicopenlyavertingnaturaldisastersandhelpingwiththingslikefoodandwaterproduction.Theydidn'tneedtodothatasmuchanymore,butthemagicwasstillintheirblood.Itburnedinthemandmadethemwanttoreachouttotheearthandwieldtheirpower.Academieslike this existed to help Moroi control the magic and learn how to doincreasingly complex things with it. Students also had to learn the rules thatsurroundedmagic, rules that had been in place for centuries andwere strictlyenforced.

AllMoroihadasmallabilityineachelement.Whentheygottobearoundourage,students"specialized"whenoneelementgrewstrongerthantheothers:earth,water,fire,orair.Notspecializingwaslikenotgoingthroughpuberty.

AndLissa…well,Lissahadn'tspecializedyet."IsMs.Carmackstillteachingthat?Whatshe'dsay?”"Shesaysshe'snotworried.Shethinksit'llcome.”"Didyou—didyoutellherabout—”Lissashookherhead."No.Ofcoursenot.”Weletthesubjectdrop.Itwasonewethoughtaboutalotbutrarelyspoke

of.Westartedmovingagain,scanningthetablesaswedecidedwheretosit.A

fewpairsofeyeslookedupatuswithblatantcuriosity."Lissa!"cameanearbyvoice.Glancingover,wesawNataliewavingatus.

LissaandIexchangedlooks.NataliewassortofLissa'scousininthewayVictorwassortofheruncle,butwe'dneverhungoutwithherallthatmuch.

Lissashruggedandheadedinthatdirection."Whynot?”I followed reluctantly. Natalie was nice but also one of the most

uninteresting people I knew. Most royals at the school enjoyed a kind ofcelebritystatus,butNataliehadneverfitinwiththatcrowd.Shewastooplain,too uninterested in the politics of the Academy, and too clueless to reallynavigatethemanyway.

Natalie'sfriendseyeduswithaquietcuriosity,butshedidn'tholdback.Shethrewherarmsaroundus.LikeLissa,shehadjade-greeneyes,butherhairwasjetblack,likeVictor'shadbeenbeforehisdiseasegrayedit.

"You'reback!Iknewyouwouldbe!Everyonesaidyouweregoneforever,butIneverbelievedthat.Iknewyoucouldn'tstayaway.Why'dyougo?Thereare so many stories about why you left!" Lissa and I exchanged glances asNatalieprattledon."Camillesaidoneofyougotpregnantandwentofftohaveanabortion,butIknewthatcouldn'tbetrue.Someoneelsesaidyouwentoffto

hangoutwithRose'smom,butIfiguredMs.KirovaandDaddywouldn'thavebeen so upset if you'd turned up there. Did you know we might get to beroommates?Iwastalkingto…”

Onandonshechatted, flashingher fangsas she spoke. I smiledpolitely,lettingLissadealwiththeonslaughtuntilNatalieaskedadangerousquestion.

"What'dyoudoforblood,Lissa?”ThetableregardedusquestioninglyLissafroze,butIimmediatelyjumped

in,theliecomingeffortlesslytomylips."Oh,it'seasy.Therearealotofhumanswhowanttodoit.”"Really?"askedoneofNatalie'sfriends,wide-eyed."Yup.Youfind 'ematpartiesandstuff.They'reall looking fora fix from

something,andtheydon'treallygetthatavampire'sdoingit:mostarealreadysowasted theydon't remember anyway."Myalreadyvaguedetailsdriedup, so IsimplyshruggedinascoolandconfidentawayasIcouldmanage.Itwasn'tlikeanyofthemknewanybetter."LikeIsaid,it'seasy.Almosteasierthanwithourownfeeders.”

Natalie accepted this and than launched into someother topic.Lissa shotmeagratefullook.

Ignoringtheconversationagain,Itookintheoldfaces,tryingtofigureoutwhowashangingoutwithwhomandhowpowerhadshiftedwithintheschool.Mason,sittingwithagroupofnovices,caughtmyeye,andIsmiled.Nearhim,agroupofMoroiroyalssat,laughingoversomething.Aaronandtheblondgirlsattheretoo.

"Hey,Natalie,"Isaid,turningaroundandcuttingheroff.Shedidn'tseemtonoticeormind."Who'sAaron'snewgirlfriend?”

"Huh? Oh. Mia Rinaldi." Seeing my blank look, she asked, "Don't yourememberher?”

"ShouldI?Wassheherewhenweleft?”"She'salwaysbeenhere,"saidNatalie."She'sonlyayearyoungerthanus.”IshotaquestioninglookatLissa,whoonlyshrugged."Whyisshesopissedoffatus?"Iasked."Neitherofusknowher.”"Idon'tknow,"answeredNatalie. "Maybe she's jealousaboutAaron.She

wasn'tmuchofanybodywhenyouguysleft.Shegotreallypopularreally fast.Sheisn'troyaloranything,butonceshestarteddatingAaron,she—”

"Okay,thanks,"Iinterrupted."Itdoesn'treally—”MyeyesliftedupfromNatalie'sfacetoJesseZeklos's,justashepassedby

our table. Ah, Jesse. I'd forgotten about him. I liked flirting withMason andsomeof theothernovices,butJessewas inanentirelydifferentcategory.Youflirtedwiththeotherguyssimplyforthesakeofflirting.YouflirtedwithJesse

inthehopesofgettingsemi-nakedwithhim.HewasaroyalMoroi,andhewasso hot, he should have worn aWARNING: FLAMMABLE sign. Hemetmyeyesandgrinned.

"HeyRose,welcomeback.Youstillbreakinghearts?”"Areyouvolunteering?”Hisgrinwidened. "Let'shangout sometimeand findout. Ifyoueverget

parole.”He kept walking, and I watched him admiringly. Natalie and her friends

stared atme in awe. Imight not be a god in theDimitri sense, butwith thisgroup,LissaandIweregods—oratleastformergods—ofanothernature.

"Ohmygawd,"exclaimedonegirl.Ididn'trememberhername."ThatwasJesse.”

"Yes,"Isaid,smiling."Itcertainlywas.”"IwishIlookedlikeyou,"sheaddedwithasigh.Their eyes fell onme. Technically, Iwas half-Moroi, butmy lookswere

human.I'dblendedinwellwithhumansduringourtimeaway,somuchsothatI'dbarelythoughtaboutmyappearanceatall.Here,amongtheslimandsmall-chested Moroi girls, certain features—meaning my larger breasts and moredefinedhips—stoodout.IknewIwaspretty,buttoMoroiboys,mybodywasmore than just pretty: it was sexy in a risqué way. Dhampirs were an exoticconquest,anoveltyallMoroiguyswantedto"try.”

Itwasironicthatdhampirshadsuchanallurehere,becauseslenderMoroigirls lookedverymuch like thesuper-skinny runwaymodels sopopular in thehumanworld.Most humans could never reach that "ideal" skinniness, just asMoroigirlscouldneverlooklikeme.Everyonewantedwhatshecouldn'thave.

LissaandIgottosittogetherinoursharedafternoonclassesbutdidn'tdomuch talking. The stares she'dmentioned certainly did follow us, but I foundthat themore I talked topeople, themore theywarmedup.Slowly,gradually,they seemed to remember who we were, and the novelty—though not theintrigue—ofourcrazystuntworeoff.

Ormaybe I should say, they rememberedwho Iwas. Because Iwas theonlyonetalking.Lissastaredstraightahead,listeningbutneitheracknowledgingnorparticipatinginmyattemptsatconversation.Icouldfeelanxietyandsadnesspouringoutofher.

"All right," I told her when classes finally ended. We stood outside theschool,andIwasfullyawarethatindoingso,Iwasalreadybreakingthetermsof my agreement with Kirova. "We're not staying here," I told her, looking

aroundthecampusuneasily.I'mgoingtofindawaytogetusout.”"Youthinkwecouldreallydoitasecondtime?"Lissaaskedquietly."Absolutely." I spokewith certainty, again relieved she couldn't readmy

feelings.Escapingthefirsttimehadbeentrickyenough.Doingitagainwouldbearealbitch,notthatIcouldn'tstillfindaway.

"Youreallywould,wouldn'tyou?"Shesmiled,moretoherselfthantome,likeshe'dthoughtofsomethingfunny."Ofcourseyouwould.It'sjust,well..."Shesighed."Idon'tknowifweshouldgo.Maybe—maybeweshouldstay.”

Iblinkedinastonishment."What?"Notoneofmymoreeloquentanswers,butthebestIcouldmanage.I'dneverexpectedthisfromher.

"I saw you, Rose. I saw you talking to the other novices during class,talkingaboutpractice.Youmissthat.”

"It'snotworthit,"Iargued."Notif…notifyou…"Icouldn'tfinish,butshewas right. She'd read me. I hadmissed the other novices. Even some of theMoroi.Buttherewasmoretoit thanjust that.Theweightofmyinexperience,howmuchI'dfallenbehind,hadbeengrowingallday.

"It might be better," she countered. "I haven't had as many…you know,thingshappeninginawhile.Ihaven'tfeltlikeanyonewasfollowingorwatchingus.”

Ididn'tsayanythingtothat.Beforewe'dlefttheAcademy,she'dalwaysfeltlike someone was following her, like she was being hunted. I'd never seenevidencetosupportthat,butIhadonceheardoneofourteachersgoonandonabout the same sort of thing.Ms.Karp.She'd been a prettyMoroi,with deepauburnairandhighcheekbones.AndIwasprettysureshe'dbeencrazy.

"Youneverknowwho'swatching,"sheusedtosay,walkingbrisklyaroundthe classroom as she shut all the blinds. "Orwho's following you. Best to besafe.Best toalwaysbesafe."We'dsnickeredamongstourselvesbecause that'swhatstudentsdoaroundeccentricandparanoid teachers.The thoughtofLissaactinglikeherbotheredme.

"What'swrong?"Lissaasked,noticingthatIwaslostinthought."Huh?Nothing. Just thinking." I sighed, trying tobalancemyownwants

with what was best for her. "Liss, we can stay, I guess…but there are a fewconditions.”

Thismadeherlaugh."ARoseultimatum,huh?”"I'mserious."WordsIdidn'tsayverymuch."Iwantyoutostayawayfrom

the royals.Not likeNatalie or anything but you know, the others. The powerplayers.Camille.Carly.Thatgroup.”

Heramusementturnedtoastonishment."Areyouserious?”"Sure.Youneverlikedthemanyway.”

"Youdid.”"No.Notreally.Ilikedwhattheycouldoffer.Allthepartiesandstuff.”"Andyoucangowithoutthatnow?"Shelookedskeptical."Sure.WedidinPortland.”"Yeah,butthatwasdifferent."Hereyesstaredoff,notreallyfocusedonany

onething."Here…hereI'vegottobeapartofthat.Ican'tavoidit.”"Thehellyoudo.Nataliestaysoutofthatstuff.”"Natalie isn'tgoingtoinheritherfamily's title,"sheretorted."I'vealready

gotit.I'vegottobeinvolved,startmakingconnections.Andre—”"Liss," I groaned. "You aren't Andre." I couldn't believe she was still

comparingherselftoherbrother."Hewasalwaysinvolvedinallthatstuff.”"Yeah,well,"Isnappedback,"he'sdeadnow.”Herfacehardened."Youknow,sometimesyouaren'tverynice.”"You don't keepme around to be nice.Youwant nice, there are a dozen

sheep in there who would rip each other's throats to get in good with theDragomir princess. You keep me around to tell you the truth, and here it is:Andre'sdead.You'retheheirnow,andyou'regoingtodealwithithoweveryoucan.But fornow, thatmeansstayingawayfromtheother royals.We'll just lielow.Coastthroughthemiddle.Getinvolvedinthatstuffagain,Liss,andyou'lldriveyourself…”

"Crazy?"shesuppliedwhenIdidn'tfinish.NowIlookedaway."Ididn'tmean…”"It'sokay"shesaid,afteramoment.Shesighedandtouchedmyarm."Fine.

We'llstayandwe'llkeepoutofallthatstuff.We'll'coastthroughthemiddle'likeyouwant.HangoutwithNatalie,Iguess.”

Tobeperfectlyhonest, Ididn'twantanyof that. Iwanted togo toall theroyalpartiesandwilddrunkenfestivitieslikewe'ddonebefore.We'dkeptoutofthatlifeforyearsuntilLissa'sparentsandbrotherdied.Andreshouldhavebeentheone to inherit her family's title, andhe'd certainly acted like it.Handsomeandoutgoing,he'dcharmedeveryoneheknewandhadbeenaleaderinall theroyalcliquesandclubsthatexistedoncampus.Afterhisdeath,Lissahadfeltitwasherfamilydutytotakehisplace.

I'dgotten to join thatworldwithher. Itwaseasyforme,becauseIdidn'treallyhavetodealwiththepoliticsofit.Iwasaprettydhampir,onewhodidn'tmindgettingintotroubleandpullingcrazystunts.Ibecameanovelty;theylikedhavingmearoundforthefunofit.

Lissahadtodealwithothermatters.TheDragomirswereoneofthetwelverulingfamilies.She'dhaveaverypowerfulplaceinMoroisociety,andtheother

youngroyalswantedtogetingoodwithher.Fakefriendstriedtoschmoozeherandgethertoteamupagainstotherpeople.Theroyalscouldbribeandbackstabin the same breath—and thatwas justwith eachother.To dhampirs and non-royals,theywerecompletelyunpredictable.

Thatcruelculturehadeventuallytakenits tollonLissa.Shehadanopen,kindnature,onethatIloved,andIhatedtoseeherupsetandstressedbyroyalgames.She'dgrown fragile since the accident, andall theparties in theworldweren'tworthseeingherhurt.

"All right then," I said finally. "We'll seehow thisgoes. If anythinggoeswrong—anythingatall—weleave.Noarguments.”

Shenodded."Rose?”WebothlookedupatDimitri's loomingform.Ihopedhehadn'theardthe

partaboutusleaving."You'relateforpractice,"hesaidevenly.SeeingLissa,hegaveapolitenod.

"Princess.”Ashe and Iwalkedaway, Iworried aboutLissa andwondered if staying

herewastherightthingtodo.Ifeltnothingalarmingthroughthebond,butheremotions spiked all over the place. Confusion. Nostalgia. Fear. Anticipation.Strongandpowerful,theyfloodedintome.

Ifeltthepulljustbeforeithappened.Itwasexactlylikewhathadhappenedontheplane:heremotionsgrewsostrongthat they"sucked"meintoherheadbeforeIcouldstopthem.Icouldnowseeandfeelwhatshedid.

She walked slowly around the commons, toward the small RussianOrthodox chapel that served most of the school's religious needs. Lissa hadalwaysattendedmassregularly.Notme.

IhadastandingarrangementwithGod:I'dagreetobelieveinhim—barely—solongasheletmesleepinonSundays.

Butasshewent inside, Icouldfeel thatshewasn't there topray.Shehadanother purpose, one I didn't know about. Glancing around, she verified thatneitherthepriestnoranyworshipperswerecloseby.Theplacewasempty.

Slippingthroughadoorwayinthebackofthechapel,sheclimbedanarrowsetofcreakystairsupintotheattic.Hereitwasdarkanddusty.Theonlylightcame through a large stained-glass window that fractured the faint glow ofsunriseintotiny,multicoloredgemsacrossthefloor.

I hadn't knownuntil thatmoment that this roomwas a regular retreat forLissa.ButnowIcouldfeelit,feelhermemoriesofhowsheusedtoescapeheretobealoneandtothink.Theanxietyinherebbedawayeversoslightlyasshetook in the familiar surroundings. She climbed up into the window seat and

leanedherheadbackagainstitsside,momentarilyentrancedbythesilenceandthelight.

Moroicouldstandsomesunlight,unlike theStrigoi,but theyhad to limittheir exposure. Sitting here, she could almost pretend she was in the sun,protectedbytheglass'sdilutionoftherays.

Breathe,justbreathe,she toldherself. It'llbeokay.Rosewill takecareofeverything.

Shebelievedthatpassionately,likealways,andrelaxedfurther.Thenalowvoicespokefromthedarkness."YoucanhavetheAcademybutnotthewindowseat.”She sprang up, heart pounding. I shared her anxiety, and my own pulse

quickened."Who'sthere?”Amomentlater,ashaperosefrombehindastackofcrates,justoutsideher

field of vision. The figure stepped forward, and in the poor lighting, familiarfeaturesmaterialized.Messyblackhair.Paleblueeyes.Aperpetually sardonicsmirk.

ChristianOzera."Don'tworry," he said. "Iwon't bite.Well, at least not in theway you're

afraidof."Hechuckledathisownjoke.Shedidn't find it funny.ShehadcompletelyforgottenaboutChristian.So

hadI.Nomatterwhathappenedinourworld,afewbasic truthsaboutvampires

remainedthesame.Moroiwerealive;Strigoiwereundead.Moroiweremortal;Strigoiwereimmortal.Moroiwereborn;Strigoiweremade.

And there were two ways to make a Strigoi. Strigoi could forcibly turnhumans,dhampirs,orMoroiwithasinglebite.Moroitemptedbythepromiseofimmortality could become Strigoi by choice if they purposely killed anotherpersonwhilefeeding.Doingthatwasconsidereddarkandtwisted, thegreatestofallsins,bothagainsttheMoroiwayoflifeandnatureitself.Moroiwhochosethisdarkpathlosttheirabilitytoconnectwithelementalmagicandotherpowersoftheworld.Thatwaswhytheycouldnolongergointothesun.

ThisiswhathadhappenedtoChristian'sparents.TheywereStrigoi.

Five

OR RATHER, THEYHADBEEN Strigoi. A regiment of guardians hadhuntedthemdownandkilledthem.Ifrumorsweretrue,Christianhadwitnessedit allwhen hewas very young.And although hewasn't Strigoi himself, somepeoplethoughthewasn'tfaroff,withthewayhealwaysworeblackandkepttohimself.

Strigoiornot,Ididn't trusthim.Hewasajerk,andIsilentlyscreamedatLissatogetoutofthere—notthatmyscreamingdidmuchgood.Stupidone-waybond.

"Whatareyoudoinghere?"sheasked."Takinginthesights,ofcourse.Thatchairwiththetarponitisparticularly

lovelythis timeofyear.Overthere,wehaveanoldboxfullof thewritingsoftheblessedandcrazySt.Vladimir.Andlet'snotforgetthatbeautifultablewithnolegsinthecorner.”

"Whatever." She rolled her eyes andmoved toward the door, wanting toleave,butheblockedherway.

"Well,whataboutyou?"hetaunted."Whyareyouuphere?Don'tyouhavepartiestogotoorlivestodestroy?”

SomeofLissa'soldsparkreturned."Wow,that'shilarious.AmIlikeariteofpassagenow?GoandseeifyoucanpissoffLissatoprovehowcoolyouare?Somegirl Idon'tevenknowyelledatmetoday,andnowI'vegot todealwithyou?Whatdoesittaketobeleftalone?”

"Oh.Sothat'swhyyou'reuphere.Forapityparty.”"Thisisn'tajoke.I'mserious."IcouldtellLissawasgettingangry.Itwas

trumpingherearlierdistress.Heshruggedandleanedcasuallyagainsttheslopingwall."SoamI.Ilove

pityparties.IwishI'dbroughtthehats.Whatdoyouwanttomopeaboutfirst?How it's going to take you awhole day to be popular and loved again?Howyou'll have to wait a couple weeks before Hollister can ship out some newclothes?Ifyouspringforrushshipping,itmightnotbesolong.”

"Letmeleave,"shesaidangrily,thistimepushinghimaside."Wait,"hesaid,asshereachedthedoor.Thesarcasmdisappearedfromhis

voice."What…um,whatwasitlike?”"Whatwaswhatlike?"shesnapped."Beingoutthere.AwayfromtheAcademy.”She hesitated for a moment before answering, caught off guard by what

seemedlikeagenuineattemptatconversation."Itwasgreat.NooneknewwhoIwas. Iwas justanotherface.NotMoroi.Notroyal.Notanything."She looked

downatthefloor."EveryoneherethinkstheyknowwhoIam.”"Yeah.It'skindofhardtooutliveyourpast,"hesaidbitterly.ItoccurredtoLissaatthatmoment—andmetobydefault—justhowhardit

might be to be Christian.Most of the time, people treated him like he didn'texist. Like hewas a ghost. They didn't talk to or about him. They just didn'tnoticehim.Thestigmaofhisparents'crimewastoostrong,castingitsshadowontotheentireOzerafamily.

Still,he'dpissedheroff,andshewasn'tabouttofeelsorryforhim."Wait—isthisyourpitypartynow?”He laughed,almostapprovingly."This roomhasbeenmypityparty fora

yearnow.”"Sorry," said Lissa snarkily. "I was coming here before I left. I've got a

longerclaim.”"Squatters' rights. Besides, I have tomake sure I stay near the chapel as

muchaspossiblesopeopleknowIhaven'tgoneStrigoi…yet."Again,thebittertonerangout.

"Iusedtoalwaysseeyouatmass.Isthattheonlyreasonyougo?Tolookgood?" Strigoi couldn't enter holy ground. More of that sinning-against-the-worldthing.

"Sure,"hesaid."Whyelsego?Forthegoodofyoursoul?”"Whatever,"saidLissa,whoclearlyhadadifferentopinion."I'llleaveyou

alonethen.”"Wait,"he said again.Hedidn't seem towanther togo. "I'llmakeyoua

deal.Youcanhangoutheretooifyoutellmeonething.”"What?"Sheglancedbackathim.He leaned forward. "Of all the rumors I heard about you today—and

believeme,Iheardplenty,evenifnooneactuallytoldthemtome—therewasonethatdidn'tcomeupverymuch.Theydissectedeverythingelse:whyyouleft,whatyoudidoutthere,whyyoucameback,thespecialization,whatRosesaidtoMia,blah,blah,blah.Andinallofthat,noone,nooneeverquestionedthatstupidstorythatRosetoldabouttherebeingallsortsoffringehumanswholetyoutakeblood.”

She looked away, and I could feel her cheeks starting to burn. "It's notstupid.Orastory.”

Helaughedsoftly."I'velivedwithhumans.MyauntandIstayedawayaftermyparents…died.It'snotthateasytofindblood."Whenshedidn'tanswer,helaughedagain."ItwasRose,wasn'tit?Shefedyou.”

Arenewedfearshotthroughbothherandme.Nooneatschoolcouldknowabout that. Kirova and the guardians on the scene knew, but they'd kept that

knowledgetothemselves."Well.Ifthat'snotfriendship,Idon'tknowwhatitis,"hesaid."Youcan'ttellanyone,"sheblurtedout.Thiswasallweneeded.AsI'djustbeenreminded,feederswerevampire-

biteaddicts.Weacceptedthataspartoflifebutstilllookeddownonthemforit.For anyone else—especially a dhampir—letting aMoroi take blood from youwas almost, well, dirty. In fact, one of the kinkiest, practically pornographicthingsadhampircoulddowasletaMoroidrinkbloodduringsex.

Lissa and I hadn't had sex, of course, but we'd both known what otherswouldthinkofmefeedingher.

"Don'ttellanyone,"Lissarepeated.Hestuffedhishandsinhiscoatpocketsandsatdownononeofthecrates.

"WhoamIgoingtotell?Look,gograbthewindowseat.Youcanhaveittodayandhangoutforawhile.Ifyou'renotstillafraidofme.”

Shehesitated,studyinghim.Helookeddarkandsurly,lipscurledinasortof I'm-such-a-rebel smirk. But he didn't look too dangerous. He didn't lookStrigoi.Gingerly,shesatbackdowninthewindowseat,unconsciouslyrubbingherarmsagainstthecold.

Christianwatchedher,andamomentlater,theairwarmedupconsiderably.LissametChristian's eyes and smiled, surprised she'd never noticed how

icybluetheywerebefore."Youspecializedinfire?”He nodded and pulled up a broken chair. "Now we have luxury

accommodations.”Isnappedoutofthevision."Rose?Rose?”Blinking,IfocusedonDimitri'sface.Hewasleaningtowardme,hishands

grippingmyshoulders.I'dstoppedwalking;westoodinthemiddleofthequadseparatingtheupperschoolbuildings.

"Areyouallright?”"I…yeah.Iwas…IwaswithLissa…"Iputahandtomyforehead.I'dnever

hadsuchalongorclearexperiencelikethat."Iwasinherhead.”"Her…head?”"Yeah.It'spartofthebond."Ididn'treallyfeellikeelaborating."Issheallright?”"Yeah, she's…" I hesitated.Was she all right? Christian Ozera had just

invited her to hang outwith him.Not good. Therewas "coasting through themiddle,"andthentherewasturningtothedarkside.Butthefeelingshummingthrough our bond were no longer scared or upset. She was almost content,thoughstillalittlenervous."She'snotindanger,"Ifinallysaid.Ihoped.

"Canyoukeepgoing?”Thehard,stoicwarriorI'dmetearlierwasgone—justforamoment—and

heactuallylookedconcerned.Trulyconcerned.Feelinghiseyesonmelikethatmade something flutter inside of me—which was stupid, of course. I had noreasontogetallgoofy,justbecausethemanwastoogood-lookingforhisowngood.After all, hewas an antisocial god, according toMason.Onewhowassupposedlygoingtoleavemeinallsortsofpain.

"Yeah.I'mfine.”Iwentintothegym'sdressingroomandchangedintotheworkoutclothes

someonehadfinallythoughttogivemeafteradayofpracticinginjeansandaT-shirt. Gross. Lissa hanging out with Christian troubled me, but I shoved thatthought away for later as my muscles informed me they did not want to gothroughanymoreexercisetoday.

SoIsuggestedtoDimitrithatmaybeheshouldletmeoffthistime.Helaughed,andIwasprettysureitwasatmeandnotwithme."Whyisthatfunny?”"Oh,"hesaid,hissmiledropping."Youwereserious.”"OfcourseIwas!Look,I'vetechnicallybeenawakefor

twodays.Whydowehavetostartthistrainingnow?Letmegotobed,"Iwhined."It'sjustonehour.”

Hecrossedhisarmsandlookeddownatme.Hisearlierconcernwasgone.Hewas all businessnow.Tough love. "Howdoyou feel right now?After thetrainingyou'vedonesofar?”

"Ihurtlikehell.”"You'llfeelworsetomorrow.”"So?”"So,bettertojumpinnowwhileyoustillfeel…notasbad.”"Whatkindoflogicisthat?"Iretorted.ButIdidn'targueanymoreasheledmeintotheweightroom.Heshowed

metheweightsandrepshewantedmetodo, thensprawledinacornerwithabatteredWesternnovel.Somegod.

When I finished, he stood besideme and demonstrated a few cool-downstretches.

"How'dyouendupasLissa'sguardian?"Iasked."Youweren'thereafewyearsago.Wereyoueventrainedatthisschool?”

Hedidn'tanswerrightaway. Igot thefeelinghedidn't talkabouthimselfveryoften."No.IattendedtheoneinSiberia.”

"Whoa.That'sgottobetheonlyplaceworsethanMontana.”A glint of something—maybe amusement—sparked in his eyes, but he

didn'tacknowledge the joke."After Igraduated, Iwasaguardian foraZekloslord.Hewaskilledrecently."Hissmiledropped,hisfacegrewdark."Theysentmeherebecause theyneededextrason campus.When theprincess turnedup,theyassignedmetoher,sinceI'dalreadybearound.Notthatitmattersuntilsheleavescampus.”

I thoughtaboutwhathe'dsaidbefore.SomeStrigoikilledtheguyhewassupposedtohavebeenguarding?"Didthislorddieonyourwatch?”

"No.Hewaswithhisotherguardian.Iwasaway.”He fell silent,hismindobviously somewhereelse.TheMoroiexpecteda

lotfromus,buttheydidrecognizethattheguardianswere—moreorless—onlyhuman.So,guardiansgotpayandtimeofflikeyou'dgetinanyotherjob.Somehard-coreguardians—likemymom—refusedvacations,vowingnever to leavetheirMoroi'ssides.LookingatDimitrinow,Ihadafeelinghemightverywellturn into one of those. If he'd been awayon legitimate leave, he could hardlyblamehimselfforwhathappenedtothatguy.Still,heprobablydidanyway.I'dblamemyselftooifsomethinghappenedtoLissa.

"Hey," I said, suddenlywanting to cheer himup, "did you help comeupwith the plan to get us back?Because itwas pretty good.Brute force and all

that.”Hearchedaneyebrowcuriously.Cool. I'dalwayswished Icoulddo that.

"You'recomplimentingmeonthat?”"Well,itwasahellofalotbetterthanthelastonetheytried.”"Lastone?”"Yeah.InChicago.Withthepackofpsi-hounds.”"Thiswasthefirsttimewefoundyou.InPortland.”I sat up from my stretches and crossed my legs. "Um, I don't think I

imagined psi-hounds. Who else could have sent them? They only answer toMoroi.Maybenoonetoldyouaboutit.”

"Maybe,"hesaiddismissively.Icouldtellbyhisfacehedidn'tbelievethat.Ireturnedtothenovices'dormafterthat.TheMoroistudentslivedonthe

other side of the quad, closer to the commons. The living arrangementswerepartlybasedonconvenience.Beingherekeptusnovicesclosertothegymandtraininggrounds.ButwealsolivedseparatelytoaccommodatethedifferencesinMoroi anddhampir lifestyles.Their dormhad almost nowindows, aside fromtintedonesthatdimmedsunlight.Theyalsohadaspecialsectionwherefeedersalways stayed on hand. The novices' dorm was built in a more open way,allowingformorelight.

Ihadmyownroombecausethereweresofewnovices,letalonegirls.Theroom they'dgivenmewassmallandplain,witha twinbedandadeskwithacomputer.MyfewbelongingshadbeenspiritedoutofPortlandandnowsatinboxesaroundtheroom.Irummagedthroughthem,pullingoutaT-shirttosleepin.IfoundacoupleofpicturesasIdid,oneofLissaandmeatafootballgameinPortlandandanothertakenwhenI'dgoneonvacationwithherfamily,ayearbeforetheaccident.

I set them onmy desk and booted up the computer. Someone from techsupporthadhelpfullygivenmeasheetwithinstructionsforrenewingmye-mailaccount and setting up a password. I did both, happy to discover no one hadrealizedthatthiswouldserveasawayformetocommunicatewithLissa.Tootired towrite to her now, Iwas about to turn everything offwhen I noticed Ialreadyhadamessage.FromJanineHathaway.Itwasshort:

I'mgladyou'reback.Whatyoudidwasinexcusable."Loveyoutoo,Mom,"Imuttered,shuttingitalldown.WhenIwenttobedafterward,Ipassedoutbeforeevenhittingthepillow,

andjustasDimitrihadpredicted,IfelttentimesworsewhenIwokeupthenextmorning.Lying there inbed, I reconsidered theperksof runningaway.ThenIrememberedgettingmyasskickedandfiguredtheonlywaytopreventthatfromhappeningagainwastogoenduresomemoreofitthismorning.

Mysorenessmadeitallthatmuchworse,butIsurvivedthebefore-schoolpracticewithDimitriandmysubsequentclasseswithoutpassingoutorfainting.

At lunch, I draggedLissa away fromNatalie's table early andgaveher aKirova-worthy lecture about Christian—particularly chastising her for lettinghim know about our blood arrangement. If that got out, it'd kill both of ussociallyandIdidn'ttrusthimnottotell.

Lissahadotherconcerns."Youwereinmyheadagain?"sheexclaimed."Forthatlong?”"Ididn'tdo itonpurpose," Iargued."It justhappened.And that'snot the

point.Howlongdidyouhangoutwithhimafterward?”"Notthatlong.Itwaskindof…fun.”"Well,youcan'tdoitagain.Ifpeoplefindoutyou'rehangingoutwithhim,

they'llcrucifyyou."Ieyedherwarily."Youaren't,like,intohim,areyou?”Shescoffed."No.Ofcoursenot."Good.Becauseifyou'regoingtogoafteraguy,stealAaronback."Hewas

boring,yes,butsafe.JustlikeNatalie.Howcomealltheharmlesspeopleweresolame?Maybethatwasthedefinitionofsafe.

Shelaughed."Miawouldclawmyeyesout.”"Wecan takeher.Besides,hedeservessomeonewhodoesn'tshopatGap

Kids.”"Rose,you'vegottostopsayingthingslikethat.”"I'mjustsayingwhatyouwon't.”"She'sonlyayearyounger," saidLissa.She laughed. "Ican'tbelieveyou

thinkI'mtheonewho'sgoingtogetusintrouble.”Smilingaswestrolled towardclass, Igaveherasidelongglance."Aaron

doeslookprettygoodthough,huh?”Shesmiledbackandavoidedmyeyes."Yeah.Prettygood.”"Ooh.Yousee?Youshouldgoafterhim.”"Whatever.I'mfinebeingfriendsnow.”"Friendswhousedtosticktheirtonguesdowneachother'sthroats.”Sherolledhereyes."Fine."I letmyteasinggo."LetAaronstayin thenurseryschool.Justso

longasyoustayawayfromChristian.He'sdangerous.”"You'reoverreacting.He'snotgoingStrigoi.”"He'sabadinfluence.”Shelaughed."YouthinkI'mindangerofgoingStrigoi?”Shedidn'twait formyanswer, insteadpushingahead toopen thedoor to

our science class. Standing there, I uneasily replayed her words and thenfollowedamomentlater.WhenIdid,Igottoseeroyalpowerinaction.Afew

guys—with giggling, watching girls—were messing with a gangly-lookingMoroi. Ididn'tknowhimverywell,but Iknewhewaspoorandcertainlynotroyal. A couple of his tormentors were air-magic users, and they'd blown thepapersoffhisdeskandwerepushing themaround the roomoncurrentsofairwhiletheguytriedtocatchthem.

My instincts urgedme to do something,maybe go smack one of the airusers.ButIcouldn'tpickafightwitheveryonewhoannoyedme,andcertainlynotagroupofroyals—especiallywhenLissaneededtostayofftheirradar.SoIcouldonlygivethemalookofdisgustasIwalkedtomydesk.AsIdid,ahandcaughtmyarm.Jesse.

"Hey," I said jokingly.Fortunately, he didn't appear to be participating inthetorturesession."Handsoffthemerchandise.”

Heflashedmeasmilebutkepthishandonme."Rose,tellPaulaboutthetimeyoustartedthefightinMs.Karp'sclass.”

Icockedmyheadtowardhim,givinghimaplayfulsmile."Istartedalotoffightsinherclass.”

"Theonewiththehermitcrab.Andthegerbil.”Ilaughed,recallingit."Ohyeah.Itwasahamster,Ithink.Ijustdroppedit

intothecrab'stank,andtheywerebothworkedupfrombeingsoclosetome,sotheywentatit.”

Paul, a guy sitting nearbywhom I didn't really know, chuckled too.He'dtransferredlastyear,apparently,andhadn'theardofthis."Whowon?”

IlookedatJessequizzically."Idon'tremember.Doyou?”"No.IjustrememberKarpfreakingout."HeturnedtowardPaul."Man,you

shouldhaveseenthismessed-upteacherweusedtohave.Usedtothinkpeoplewere after her andwould go off on stuff that didn'tmake any sense. Shewasnuts.Usedtowandercampuswhileeveryonewasasleep.”

Ismiledtightly,likeIthoughtitwasfunny.Instead,IthoughtbacktoMs.Karpagain,surprisedtobethinkingaboutherforthesecondtimeintwodays.Jessewasright—shehadwanderedcampusalotwhenshestillworkedhere.Itwasprettycreepy.I'drunintoheronce—unexpectedly.

I'dbeenclimbingoutofmydormwindowtogohangoutwithsomepeople.Itwas after hours, andwewere all supposed to be in our rooms, fast asleep.Suchescapetacticswerearegularpracticeforme.Iwasgoodatthem.

But I fell that time. I had a second-floor room, and I lostmy grip abouthalfwaydown.Sensingthegroundrushuptowardme,Itrieddesperatelytograbhold of something and slowmy fall. The building's rough stone tore intomyskin,causingcutsIwastoopreoccupiedtofeel.Islammedintothegrassyearth,backfirst,gettingthewindknockedoutofme.

"Badform,Rosemarie.Youshouldbemorecareful.Yourinstructorswouldbedisappointed.”

Peeringthroughthetangleofmyhair,IsawMs.Karplookingdownatme,abemused lookonher face.Pain, in themeantime,shot througheverypartofmybody.

Ignoring it as best I could, I clambered to my feet. Being in class withCrazyKarpwhilesurroundedbyotherstudentswasonething.Standingoutsidealone with her was an entirely different matter. She always had an eerie,distractedgleaminhereyethatmademyskinbreakoutingoosebumps.

Therewas also now a high likelihood she'd dragme off toKirova for adetention.Scarierstill.

Instead,shejustsmiledandreachedformyhands.Iflinchedbutlethertakethem. She tsked when she saw the scrapes. Tightening her grip on them, shefrownedslightly.Atingleburnedmyskin,lacedwithasortofpleasantbuzz,andthen the wounds closed up. I had a brief sense of dizziness.My temperaturespiked.Theblooddisappeared,asdidthepaininmyhipandleg.

Gasping,Ijerkedmyhandsaway.I'dseenalotofMoroimagic,butneveranythinglikethat.

"What…whatdidyoudo?”Shegavemethatweirdsmileagain."Gobacktoyourdorm,Rose.There

arebadthingsouthere.Youneverknowwhat'sfollowingyou.”Iwasstillstaringatmyhands."But…”Ilookedbackupatherandforthefirst timenoticedscarsonthesidesof

herforehead.Likenailshaddugintothem.Shewinked."Iwon'ttellonyouifyoudon'ttellonme.”

Ijumpedbacktothepresent,unsettledbythememoryofthatbizarrenight.Jesse,inthemeantime,wastellingmeaboutaparty.

"You've got to slip your leash tonight.We're going up to that spot in thewoodsaroundeightthirty.Markgotsomeweed.”

Isighedwistfully,regretreplacingthechillI'dfeltoverthememoryofMs.Karp."Can'tslipthatleash.I'mwithmyRussianjailer.”

He let go of my arm, looking disappointed, and ran a hand through hisbronze-coloredhair.Yeah.Notbeingable tohangoutwithhimwasadamnedshame.Ireallywouldhavetofixthatsomeday."Can'tyouevergetoffforgoodbehavior?"hejoked.

IgavehimwhatIhopedwasaseductivesmileasIfoundmyseat."Sure,"Icalledovermyshoulder."IfIwasevergood."

SIX

ASMUCHASLISSAANDChristian'smeetingbotheredme,itgavemeanideathenextday.

"Hey,Kirova—er,Ms.Kirova." I stood in the doorwayof her office, nothaving bothered to make an appointment. She raised her eyes from somepaperwork,clearlyannoyedtoseeme.

"Yes,MissHathaway?”"DoesmyhousearrestmeanIcan'tgotochurch?”"Ibegyourpardon?”"Yousaid thatwhenever I'mnot inclassorpractice, Ihave tostay in the

dorm.ButwhataboutchurchonSundays?Idon'tthinkit'sreallyfairtokeepmeaway frommy religious…um, needs."Or depriveme of another chance—nomatterhowshortandboring—tohangoutwithLissa.

Shepushedherglassesupthebridgeofhernose."Iwasn'tawareyouhadanyreligiousneeds.”

"IfoundJesuswhileIwasgone.”"Isn'tyourmotheranatheist?"sheaskedskeptically."Andmydad'sprobablyMuslim.ButI'vemovedontomyownpath.You

shouldn'tkeepmefromit.”Shemadeanoisethatsortofsoundedlikeasnicker."No,MissHathaway,I

shouldnot.Verywell.YoumayattendservicesonSundays.”Thevictorywasshort-lived,however,becausechurchwaseverybitaslame

asIrememberedwhenIattendedafewdayslater.IdidgettositnexttoLissa,though,whichmademefeel likeIwasgettingawaywithsomething.MostlyIjustpeople-watched.Churchwasoptionalforstudents,butwithsomanyEasternEuropean families, a lot of students were Eastern Orthodox Christians andattendedeitherbecausetheybelievedorbecausetheirparentsmadethem.

Christiansatontheoppositesideoftheaisle,pretendingtobejustasholyas he'd said.Asmuch as I didn't like him, his fake faith stillmademe smile.Dimitri sat in the back, face lined with shadows, and, like me, didn't takecommunion.As thoughtfulashe looked, Iwondered ifheeven listened to theservice.Itunedinandout.

"Following God's path is never easy," the priest was saying. "Even St.Vladimir, this school'sownpatron saint, hadadifficult time.Hewas so filledwithspiritthatpeopleoftenflockedaroundhim,enthralledjusttolistenandbeinhispresence.Sogreatwashisspirit,theoldtextssay,thathecouldhealthesick. Yet despite these gifts, many did not respect him. They mocked him,claiminghewasmisguidedandconfused.”

WhichwasanicewayofsayingVladimirwas insane.Everyoneknew it.HewasoneofahandfulofMoroisaints,sothepriestlikedtotalkabouthimalot.I'dheardallabouthim,manytimesover,beforeweleft.Great.ItlookedlikeIhadaneternityofSundaystohearhisstoryoverandoveragain.

"…andsoitwaswithshadow-kissedAnna.”Ijerkedmyheadup.Ihadnoideawhatthepriestwastalkingaboutnow,

becauseIhadn'tbeenlisteningforsometime.Butthosewordsburnedintome.Shadow-kissed. Ithadbeenawhile since Iheard them,but I'dnever forgottenthem.Iwaited,hopinghe'dcontinue,buthe'dalreadymovedontothenextpartoftheservice.Thesermonwasover.

Churchconcluded,andasLissaturnedtogo,Ishookmyheadather."Waitforme.I'llberightthere.”

Ipushedmywaythroughthecrowd,uptothefront,wherethepriestwasspeakingwithafewpeople.Iwaitedimpatientlywhilehefinished.Nataliewasthere,askinghimaboutvolunteerworkshecoulddo.Ugh.Whenshefinished,sheleft,greetingmeasshepassed.

Thepriestraisedhiseyebrowswhenhesawme."Hello,Rose.It'snice toseeyouagain.”

"Yeah…youtoo,"Isaid."IheardyoutalkingaboutAnna.Abouthowshewas'shadow-kissed.'Whatdoesthatmean?”

Hefrowned."I'mnotentirelysure.Shelivedaverylongtimeago.Itwasoften common to refer to people by titles that reflected someof their traits. Itmighthavebeengiventomakehersoundfierce.”

Itriedtohidemydisappointment."Oh.Sowhowasshe?”Thistimehisfrownwasdisapprovingratherthanthoughtful."Imentioned

itanumberoftimes.”"Oh.Imusthave,um,missedthat.”Hisdisapprovalgrew,andheturnedaround."Waitjustamoment.”Hedisappearedthroughthedoornearthealtar,theoneLissahadtakento

the attic. I considered fleeingbut thoughtGodmight strikemedown for that.Less than aminute later, thepriest returnedwith a book.Hehanded it tome.MoroiSaints.

"Youcanlearnaboutherinhere.ThenexttimeIseeyou,I'dliketohearwhatyou'velearned.”

IscowledasIwalkedaway.Great.Homeworkfromthepriest.Inthechapel'sentryway,IfoundLissatalkingtoAaron.Shesmiledasshe

spoke, and the feelings coming off her were happy, though certainly notinfatuated.

"You'rekidding,"sheexclaimed.

Heshookhishead."Nope.”Seeing me stroll over, she turned to me. "Rose, you're never going to

believe this. "You knowAbbyBadica?AndXander?Their guardianwants toresign.Andmarryanotherguardian.”

Now thiswas exciting gossip. A scandal, actually. "Seriously? Are they,like,goingtorunofftogether?”

She nodded. "They're getting a house. Going to get jobs with humans, Iguess.”

IglancedatAaron,whohadsuddenlyturnedshywithmethere."HowareAbbyandXanderdealingwiththat?”

"Okay.Embarrassed.Theythinkit'sstupid."Thenherealizedwhohewasspeakingto."Oh.Ididn'tmean—”

"Whatever."Igavehimatightsmile."Itisstupid.”Wow. I was stunned. The rebellious part me of loved any story where

people"foughtthesystem."Only,inthiscase,theywerefightingmysystem,theoneI'dbeentrainedtobelieveinmyentirelife.

Dhampirs andMoroihada strangearrangement.Dhampirshadoriginallybeen born fromMoroimixingwith humans. Unfortunately, dhampirs couldn'treproducewitheachother—orwithhumans.Itwasaweirdgeneticthing.Muleswerethesameway,I'dbeentold,thoughthatwasn'tacomparisonIreallylikedhearing. Dhampirs and full Moroi could have children together, and, throughanother genetic oddity, their kids came out as standard dhampirs, with halfhumangenes,halfvampiregenes.

WithMoroibeingtheonlyoneswithwhomdhampirscouldreproduce,wehad to stay close to them and intermingle with them. Likewise, it becameimportant to us that theMoroi simply survived.Without them,wewere done.And with the way Strigoi loved picking off Moroi, their survival became alegitimateconcernforus.

That was how the guardian system developed. Dhampirs couldn't workmagic,butwemadegreatwarriors.We'dinheritedenhancedsensesandreflexesfrom our vampire genes and better strength and endurance from our humangenes.Wealsoweren'tlimitedbyaneedforbloodortroublewithsunlight.Sure,weweren'taspowerfulastheStrigoi,butwetrainedhard,andguardiansdidakick-assjobatkeepingMoroisafe.Mostdhampirsfeltitwasworthriskingtheirownlivestomakesureourkindcouldstillkeephavingchildren.

SinceMoroi usuallywanted to have and raiseMoroi children, you didn'tfindalotoflong-termMoroi-dhampirromances.Youespeciallydidn'tfindalotofMoroi women hooking upwith dhampir guys. But plenty of youngMoroimen liked fooling around with dhampir women, although those guys usually

wentontomarryMoroiwomen.Thatleftalotofsingledhampirmothers,butweweretoughandcouldhandleit.

However,manydhampirmotherschosenottobecomeguardiansinordertoraisetheirchildren.Thesewomensometimesworked"regular"jobswithMoroiorhumans;someofthemlivedtogetherincommunities.Thesecommunitieshadabadreputation.Idon'tknowhowmuchofitwastrue,butrumorssaidMoroimenvisitedall the time forsex.and thatsomedhampirwomen let themdrinkbloodwhiledoingit.Bloodwhores.

Regardless, almost all guardiansweremen,whichmeant therewere a lotmoreMoroithanguardians.Mostdhampirguysacceptedthattheywouldn'thavekids.TheyknewitwastheirjobtoprotectMoroiwhiletheirsistersandcousinshadbabies.

Somedhampirwomen,likemymother,stillfeltitwastheirdutytobecomeguardians—evenifitmeantnotraisingtheirownkids.AfterI'dbeenborn,she'dhandedmeovertoberaisedbyMoroi.Moroianddhampirsstartschoolprettyyoung,andtheAcademyhadessentiallytakenoverasmyparentbythetimeIwasfour.

Between her example and my life at the Academy, I believedwholeheartedly that itwasadhampir's job toprotectMoroi. Itwaspartofourheritage,anditwastheonlywaywe'dkeepgoing.Itwasthatsimple.

AndthatwaswhatmadewhattheBadicas'guardianhaddonesoshocking.He'dabandonedhisMoroiandrunoffwithanotherguardian,whichmeantshe'dabandonedherMoroi.Theycouldn'tevenhavechildrentogether,andnowtwofamilies were unprotected. What was the point? No one cared if teenagedhampirs dated or if adult dhampirs had flings. But a long-term relationship?Particularly one that involved them running away? A complete waste. And adisgrace.

AfteralittlemorespeculationontheBadicas,LissaandIleftAaron.Aswesteppedoutside,Iheardafunnyshiftingsoundandthensomethingsliding.Toolate, I realizedwhatwashappening, justasapileofslushslidoff thechapel'sroofandontous.ItwasearlyOctober,andwe'dhadearlysnowlastnight thathadstartedmeltingalmostimmediately.Asaresult,thestuffthatfellonuswasverywetandverycold.

Lissatookthebruntofit,butIstillyelpedasicywaterlandedonmyhairandneck.Afewotherssquealednearbytoo,havingcaughttheedgeofthemini-avalanche.

"You okay?" I asked her. Her coat was drenched, and her platinum hairclungtothesidesofherface.

"Y-yeah,"shesaidthroughchatteringteeth.

I pulled offmy coat and handed it to her. It had a slick surface and hadrepelledmostofthewater."Takeyoursoff.”

"Butyou'llbe—”"Takethis.”Shedid,andassheslippedonmycoat,Ifinallytunedintothelaughterthat

alwaysfollowsthesesituations.Iavoidedtheeyes,insteadfocusingonholdingLissa'swetjacketwhileshechanged.

"Wish you hadn't been wearing a coat, Rose," said Ralf Sarcozy anunusuallybulkyandplumpMoroi. Ihatedhim."Thatshirtwouldhave lookedgoodwet.”

"Thatshirt'ssouglyitshouldbeburned.Didyougetthatfromahomelessperson?”

IglancedupasMiawalkedoverandloopedherarmthroughAaron's.Herblondcurlswerearrangedperfectly,andshehadonanawesomepairofblackheels thatwouldhave lookedmuchbetteronme.At least theymadeher looktaller, I'd give her that. Aaron had been a few steps behind us but hadmiraculouslyavoidedbeingnailedbytheslush.Seeinghowsmugshelooked,Idecidedthere'dbeennomiraclesinvolved.

"I supposeyouwant tooffer toburn it,huh?" Iasked, refusing to letherknowhowmuchthatinsultbuggedme.Iknewperfectlywellmyfashionsensehadslippedoverthelasttwoyears."Oh,wait—fireisn'tyourelement,isit?Youworkwithwater.Whatacoincidencethatabunchjustfellonus.”

Mialookedasifshe'dbeeninsulted,butthegleaminhereyesshowedthatshewasenjoying thisway toomuch tobean innocentbystander. "What's thatsupposedtomean?”

"Nothingtome.ButMs.Kirovawillprobablyhavesomethingtosaywhenshefindsoutyouusedmagicagainstanotherstudent.”

"Thatwasn't an attack," she scoffed. "And itwasn'tme. Itwas an act ofGod.”

Afewotherslaughed,muchtoherdelight.Inmyimagination,Irespondedwith,So is this,and thenslammedher into thesideof thechurch. In real life,Lissasimplynudgedmeandsaid,"Let'sgo.”

SheandIwalkedofftowardourrespectivedorms,leavingbehindlaughterand jokes about our wet states and how Lissa wouldn't know anything aboutspecialization.Inside,Iseethed.IhadtodosomethingaboutMia,Irealized.InadditiontothegeneralirritationofMia'sbitchiness,Ididn'twantLissatohavetodealwithanymorestressthanshehadto.We'dbeenokaythisfirstweek,andIwantedtokeepitthatway.

"Youknow," I said,"I'm thinkingmoreandmore thatyoustealingAaron

backisagoodthing.It'll teachBitchDollalesson.Ibetit'dbeeasy,too.He'sstillcrazyaboutyou.”

"I don't want to teach anyone a lesson," said Lissa. "And I'm not crazyabouthim.”

"Come on, she picks fights and talks about us behind our backs. SheaccusedmeofgettingjeansfromtheSalvationArmyyesterday.”

"YourjeansarefromtheSalvationArmy.”"Well, yeah," I snorted, "but she has no rightmaking fun of themwhen

she'swearingstufffromTarget.”"Hey,there'snothingwrongwithTarget.IlikeTarget.”"So do I. That's not the point. She's trying to pass her stuff off like it's

freakingStellaMcCartney.”"Andthat'sacrime?”Iaffectedasolemnface."Absolutely.You'vegottatakerevenge.”"I told you, I'mnot interested in revenge."Lissa cutme a sidelong look.

"Andyoushouldn'tbeeither.”IsmiledasinnocentlyasIcould,andwhenwepartedways,Ifeltrelieved

againthatshecouldn'treadmythoughts.

"Sowhen'sthebigcatfightgoingtohappen?”Mason was waiting for me outside our dorm after I'd parted ways with

Lissa.Helookedlazyandcute,leaningagainstthewallwithcrossedarmsashewatchedme.

"I'msureIdon'tknowwhatyoumean.”Heunfoldedhimselfandwalkedwithmeintothebuilding,handingmehis

coat,sinceI'dletLissagooffwithmydryone."Isawyouguyssparringoutsidethechapel.HaveyounorespectforthehouseofGod?”

Isnorted."You'vegotaboutasmuchrespectforitasIdo,youheathen.Youdidn'tevengo.Besides,asyousaid,wewereoutside.”

"Andyoustilldidn'tanswerthequestion.”Ijustgrinnedandslippedonhiscoat.Westood in thecommonareaofourdorm, awell-supervised loungeand

study area where male and female students could mingle, along with Moroiguests. Being Sunday, it was pretty crowded with those cramming for last-minute assignments due tomorrow. Spying a small, empty table, I grabbedMason'sarmandpulledhimtowardit.

"Aren'tyousupposedtogostraighttoyourroom?”Ihunkereddown inmyseat,glancingaroundwarily. "Thereare somany

peopleheretoday,it'lltakethemawhiletonoticeme.God,I'msosickofbeinglockedaway.Andit'sonlybeenaweek.”

"I'msickofittoo.Wemissedyoulastnight.Abunchofuswentandshotpoolintherecroom.Eddiewasonfire.”

I groaned. "Don't tellme that. I don'twant tohear about yourglamoroussociallife.”

"Allright."Heproppedhiselbowuponthetableandrestedhischininhishand."ThentellmeaboutMia.You'rejustgoingtoturnaroundandpunchheroneday, aren't you? I think I rememberyoudoing that at least ten timeswithpeoplethatpissedyouoff.”

"I'manew, reformedRose," I said,doingmybest impressionofdemure.Whichwasn'tverygood.Heemittedachokingsortof laugh."Besides, if Idothat, I'll have broken my probation with Kirova. Gotta walk the straight andnarrow.”

"In otherwords, find someway to get back atMia that youwon't get introublefor.”

Ifeltasmiletugatthecornersofmylips."YouknowwhatIlikeaboutyou,Mase?YouthinkjustlikeIdo.”

"Frighteningconcept,"hereplieddrily."Sotellmewhatyouthinkofthis:Imightknowsomethingabouther,butIprobablyshouldn'ttellyou…”

I leaned forward. "Oh, you already tippedme off. You've got to tell menow.”

"It'dbewrong,"he teased."HowdoIknowyou'duse thisknowledgeforgoodinsteadofevil?”

Ibattedmyeyelashes."Canyouresistthisface?”He tookamoment tostudyme."No. Ican't,actually.Okay,hereyougo:

Miaisn'troyal.”Islouchedbackinmychair."Nokidding.Ialreadyknewthat.I'veknown

who'sroyalsinceIwastwo.”"Yeah, but there's more than just that. Her parents work for one of the

Drozdovlords."Iwavedmyhandimpatiently.AlotofMoroiworkedoutinthehuman world, but Moroi society had plenty of jobs for its own kind too.Someone had to fill them. "Cleaning stuff. Practically servants. Her dad cutsgrass,andhermom'samaid.”

I actually had a healthy respect for anyonewhopulled a full day'swork,regardlessofthejob.Peopleeverywherehadtodocrappystufftomakealiving.But,muchlikewithTarget,itbecameanothermatteraltogetherwhensomeonewastryingtopassherselfoffassomethingelse.Andin theweekthatI'dbeenhere,I'dpickeduponhowdesperatelyMiawantedtofitinwiththeschoolelite.

"Nooneknows,"Isaidthoughtfully."Andshedoesn'twantthemto.Youknowhowtheroyalsare."Hepaused.

"Well,exceptforLissa,ofcourse.They'dgiveMiaahardtimeoverit.”"Howdoyouknowallthis?”"Myuncle'saguardianfortheDrozdovs.”"Andyou'vejustbeensittingonthissecret,huh?”"Untilyoubrokeme.Sowhichpathwillyouchoose:goodorevil?”"IthinkI'llgiveheragrace—”"MissHathaway,youknowyouaren'tsupposedtobehere.”Oneofthedormmatronsstoodoverus,disapprovalalloverherface.Ihadn'tbeenjokingwhenIsaidMasonthoughtlikeme.Hecouldbullshit

aswellasIcould."Wehaveagroupprojecttodoforourhumanitiesclass.HowarewesupposedtodoitifRoseisinisolation?”

Thematronnarrowedhereyes."Youdon'tlooklikeyou'redoingwork.”I slidover thepriest's book andopened it at random. I'd placed it on the

tablewhenwesatdown."We're,um,workingonthis.”She still looked suspicious. "Onehour. I'll giveyouonemorehourdown

here,andI'dbetteractuallyseeyouworking.”"Yes,ma'am,"saidMasonstraight-faced."Absolutely.”Shewanderedoff,stilleyeingus."Myhero,"Ideclared.Hepointedatthebook."Whatisthis?”"Somethingthepriestgaveme.Ihadaquestionabouttheservice.”Hestaredatme,astonished."Oh,stopitandlookinterested."Iskimmedtheindex."I'mtryingtofind

somewomannamedAnna.”Masonslidhischairoversothathewassittingrightbesideme."Allright.

Let's'study.'“I foundapagenumber,and it tookmeto thesectiononSt.Vladimir,not

surprisingly.Wereadthroughthechapter,scanningforAnna'sname.Whenwefoundit,theauthordidn'thavemuchtosayabouther.HedidincludeanexcerptwrittenbysomeguywhohadapparentlylivedatthesametimeasSt.Vladimir:

AndwithVladimiralwaysisAnna,thedaughterofFyodor.Theirloveisaschasteandpureasthatofbrotherandsister,andmanytimeshasshedefendedhimfromStrigoiwhowouldseektodestroyhimandhisholiness.Likewise,itisshewhocomfortshimwhenthespiritbecomestoomuchtobear,andSatan'sdarknesstriestosmotherhimandweakenhisownhealthandbody.Thistooshedefendsagainst,fortheyhavebeenboundtogethereversincehesavedherlifeasachild.ItisasignofGod'slovethatHehassenttheblessedVladimiraguardiansuchasher,onewhoisshadow-kissedandalwaysknowswhatisinhisheartandmind.

"Thereyougo,"Masonsaid."Shewashisguardian.""Itdoesn'tsaywhat'shadow-kissed'means.”"Probablydoesn'tmeananything.”Somethinginmedidn'tbelievethat.Ireaditagain,tryingtomakesenseof

theold-fashionedlanguage.Masonwatchedmecuriously, lookinglikeheverymuchwantedtohelp.

"Maybetheywerehookingup,"hesuggested.Ilaughed."Hewasasaint.”"So?Saintsprobablylikesextoo.That'brotherandsister'stuffisprobably

acover."Hepointedtooneofthelines."See?Theywere'bound'together."Hewinked."It'scode.”

Bound.Itwasaweirdwordchoice,butthatdidn'tnecessarilymeanAnnaandVladimirwererippingeachother'sclothesoff.

"Idon't thinkso.They're justclose.Guysandgirlscan justbe friends." Isaiditpointedly,andhegavemeadrylook.

"Yeah?We're friends, and I don't know what's in your 'heart and mind.'"Masonputonafakephilosopher'slook."Ofcourse,somemightarguethatonecanneverknowwhat'sintheheartofawoman—”

"Oh,shutup,"Igroaned,punchinghiminthearm."For they are strange and mysterious creatures," he continued in his

scholarlyvoice, "andamanmustbe amind reader if he everwishes tomakethemhappy.”

IstartedgigglinguncontrollablyandknewI'dprobablygetintroubleagain."Well,trytoreadmymindandstopbeingsucha—”

Istoppedlaughingandlookedbackdownatthebook.Boundtogetherandalwaysknowswhatisinhisheartandmind.Theyhadabond,Irealized.IwouldhavebeteverythingIowned—which

wasn'tmuch—on it.The revelationwas astonishing.Therewere lots of vaguestoriesandmythsabouthowguardiansandMoroi'usedtohavebonds.'Butthis

wasthefirstI'deverheardofanyonespecificthatithadhappenedto.Mason had noticed my startled reaction. "You okay? You look kind of

weird.”Ishruggeditoff."Yeah.Fine."

Seven

ACOUPLEWEEKS PASSEDAFTER that, and I soon forgot about theAnnathingaslifeattheAcademywrappedaroundme.Theshockofourreturnhadwornoffalittle,andwebegantofall intoasemi-comfortableroutine.Mydaysrevolvedaroundchurch,lunchwithLissa,andwhateversortofsociallifeIcouldscrapetogetheroutsideofthat.Deniedanyrealfreetime,Ididn'thavetooharda timestayingoutof the spotlight, although Ididmanage to steala littleattentionhereandthere,despitemynoblespeechtoherabout'coastingthroughthemiddle.'Icouldn'thelpit.Ilikedflirting,Ilikedgroups,andIlikedmakingsmartasscommentsinclass.

Her new, incognito role attracted attention simply because it was sodifferent thanbeforewe'd left,backwhenshe'dbeensoactivewith theroyals.Mostpeople soon let thatgo,accepting that theDragomirprincesswas fadingoff the social radar and content to run with Natalie and her group. Natalie'sramblingstillmademewanttobeatmyheadagainstawallsometimes,butshewas really nice—nicer than almost any of the other royals—and I enjoyedhangingaroundhermostofthetime.

And,justasKirovahadwarned,Iwasindeedtrainingandworkingoutallthe time. But asmore time passed,my body stopped hatingme.Mymusclesgrewtougher,andmystaminaincreased.Istillgotmyasskickedinpracticebutnot quite as badly as I used to, which was something. The biggest toll nowseemedtobeonmyskin.Beingoutsideinthecoldsomuchwaschappingmyface, andonlyLissa's constant supplyof skin-care lotionskeptme fromagingbeforemytime.Shecouldn'tdomuchfortheblistersonmyhandsandfeet.

AroutinealsodevelopedwithDimitriandme.Masonhadbeenrightabouthim being antisocial. Dimitri didn't hang out much with the other guardians,thoughitwascleartheyallrespectedhim.AndthemoreIworkedwithhim,themoreIrespectedhimtoo,thoughIdidn'treallyunderstandhistrainingmethods.Theydidn'tseemverybadass.Wealwaysstartedbystretchinginthegym,andlately he'd been sending me outside to run, braving the increasingly coldMontanaautumn.

ThreeweeksaftermyreturntotheAcademy,Iwalkedintothegymbeforeschool one day and found him sprawled on a mat, reading a Louis L'Amourbook.SomeonehadbroughtinaportableCDplayer,andwhilethatcheeredmeupatfirst,thesongcomingfromitdidnot:"WhenDovesCry"byPrince.Itwasembarrassing to know the title, but one of our former housemates had beenobsessedwiththe'80s.

"Whoa, Dimitri," I said, tossing my bag on the floor. "I realize this is

actually a current hit inEasternEurope right now, but do you thinkwe couldmaybelistentosomethingthatwasn'trecordedbeforeIwasborn?”

Onlyhiseyesflickedtowardme;therestofhispostureremainedthesame."Whatdoesitmattertoyou?I'mtheonewho'sgoingtobelisteningtoit.You'llbeoutsiderunning.”

I made a face as I set my foot up on one of the bars and stretched myhamstrings.Allthingsconsidered,Dimitrihadagood-naturedtoleranceformysnarkiness.SolongasIdidn'tslackinmytraining,hedidn'tmindmyrunningcommentary.

"Hey,"Iasked,movingontothenextsetofstretches,"what'swithalltherunning,anyway? Imean, I realize the importanceof staminaandall that,butshouldn'tIbemovingontosomethingwithalittlehitting?They'restillkillingmeingrouppractice.”

"Maybeyoushouldhitharder,"hereplieddrily."I'mserious.”"Hardtotellthedifference."Hesetthebookdownbutdidn'tmovefromhis

sprawl. "My job is to get you ready to defend the princess and fight darkcreatures,right?”

"Yup.”"Sotellmethis:supposeyoumanagetokidnapheragainandtakeheroff

tothemall.Whileyou'rethere,aStrigoicomesatyou.Whatwillyoudo?”"Dependsonwhatstorewe'rein.”Helookedatme."Fine.I'llstabhimwithasilverstake.”Dimitri sat up now, crossing his long legs in one fluid motion. I still

couldn't figureouthowsomeoneso tallcouldbesograceful. "Oh?"Heraisedhisdarkeyebrows."Doyouhaveasilverstake?Doyouevenknowhowtouseone?”

Idraggedmyeyesawayfromhisbodyandscowled.Madewithelementalmagic, silver stakes were a guardian's deadliest weapon. Stabbing a Strigoithrough theheartwithonemeant instantdeath.Thebladeswerealso lethal toMoroi, so they weren't given out lightly to novices. My classmates had juststartedlearninghowtousethem.I'dtrainedwithagunbefore,butnoonewouldletmenearastakeyet.Fortunately,thereweretwootherwaystokillaStrigoi.

"Okay.I'llcuthisheadoff.”"Ignoring the fact that youdon't have aweapon todo that, howwill you

compensateforthefactthathemaybeafoottallerthanyou?”Istraightenedupfromtouchingmytoes,annoyed."Fine, thenI'llsethim

onfire.”

"Again,withwhat?”"All right, I give up. You've already got the answer. You're justmessing

withme.I'matthemallandIseeaStrigoi.WhatdoIdo?”Helookedatmeanddidn'tblink."Yourun.”I repressed the urge to throw something at him. When I finished my

stretches,hetoldmehe'drunwithme.Thatwasafirst.Mayberunningwouldgivemesomeinsightintohiskillerreputation.

We set out into the chilly October evening. Being back on a vampiricschedulestillfeltweirdtome.Withschoolabouttostartinanhour,Iexpectedthesuntobecomingup,notdown.Butitwassinkingonthewesternhorizon,lighting up the snow-capped mountains with an orange glow. It didn't reallywarmthingsup,andIsoonfeltthecoldpiercemylungsasmyneedforoxygendeepened.We didn't speak. He slowed his pace tomatchmine, sowe stayedtogether.

Something about that bothered me; I suddenly very much wanted hisapproval.SoIpickedupmyownpace,workingmylungsandmusclesharder.Twelvelapsaroundthetrackmadethreemiles;wehadninemoretogo.

Whenwe reached the third-to-last loop, a couple of other novices passedby, preparing to go to the group practice I'd soon be at as well. Seeing me,Masoncheered."Goodform,Rose!”

Ismiledandwavedback."You're slowingdown,"Dimitri snapped, jerkingmygaze from theboys.

Theharshnessinhisvoicestartledme."Isthiswhyyourtimesaren'tgettinganyfaster?You'reeasilydistracted?”

Embarrassed, I increased my speed once more, despite the fact that mybodystartedscreamingobscenitiesatme.Wefinishedthetwelvelaps,andwhenhechecked,hefoundwe'dshavedtwominutesoffmybesttime.

"Not bad, huh?" I crowed when we headed back inside for cool-downstretches."LookslikeIcouldgetasfarastheLimitedbeforetheStrigoigotmeatthemall.NotsurehowLissawoulddo.”

"Ifshewaswithyou,she'dbeokay.”Ilookedupinsurprise.Itwasthefirstrealcomplimenthe'dpaidmesinceI

started training with him. His brown eyes watched me, both approving andamused.

Andthat'swhenithappened.I felt like someonehad shotme.Sharp andbiting, terror exploded inmy

body and in my head. Small razors of pain. My vision blurred, and for amoment, Iwasn't standing there. Iwas runningdown a flight of stairs, scaredanddesperate,needingtogetoutofthere,needingtofind…me.

Myvision cleared, leavingmebackon the track andout ofLissa's head.WithoutawordtoDimitri,Itoreoff,runningasfastasIcouldtowardtheMoroidorm.Itdidn'tmatterthatI'djustputmylegsthroughamini-marathon.Theyranhardand fast, like theywere shinyandnew.Distantly, IwasawareofDimitricatchinguptome,askingmewhatwaswrong.ButIcouldn'tanswerhim.Ihadonetaskandonealone:gettothedorm.

Its looming, ivy-covered formwas justcoming intoviewwhenLissametupwithus,herfacestreakedwithtears.Icametoajarringstop,mylungsreadytoburst.

"What'swrong?Whathappened?"Idemanded,clutchingherarms,forcinghertolookintomyeyes.

Butshecouldn'tanswer.She just flungherarmsaroundme,sobbing intomychest.Iheldher there,strokinghersleek,silkyhairwhileI toldher itwasgoingtobeallright—whatever 'it'was.Andhonestly,Ididn'tcarewhatitwasjustthen.Shewashere,andshewassafe,whichwasallthatmattered.Dimitrihoveredoverus,alertandreadyforanythreat,hisbodycoiledtoattack.Ifeltsafewithhimbesideus.

Ahalf hour later,wewere crammed insideLissa's dorm roomwith threeotherguardians,Ms.Kirova,andthehallmatron.ThiswasthefirsttimeI'dseenLissa'sroom.Nataliehadindeedmanagedtogetherasaroommate,andthetwosides of the room were a study in contrasts. Natalie's looked lived in, withpicturesonthewallandafrillybedspreadthatwasn'tdorm-issue.Lissahadasfew possessions as I did, making her half noticeably bare. She did have onepicturetapedtothewall,apicturetakenfromlastHalloween,whenwe'ddresseduplikefairies,completewithwingsandglitterymakeup.Seeingthatpictureandrememberinghowthingsusedtobemadeadullpainforminmychest.

Withalltheexcitement,nooneseemedtorememberthatIwasn'tsupposedtobeinthere.Outsideinthehall,otherMoroigirlscrowdedtogether,tryingtofigureoutwhatwasgoingon.Nataliepushedherwaythroughthem,wonderingwhat the commotion in her roomwas.When shediscovered it, she came to ascreechinghalt.

Shock and disgust showed on almost everyone's faces as we stared atLissa'sbed.Therewasafoxonthepillow.Itscoatwasreddish-orange,tingedinwhite.Itlookedsosoftandcuddlythatitcouldhavebeenapet,perhapsacat,somethingyou'dholdinyourarmsandsnugglewith.

Asidefromthefactthatitsthroathadbeenslit.The insideof the throat lookedpinkand jellylike.Blood stained that soft

coat and had run down onto the yellow bedspread, forming a dark pool thatspreadacrossthefabric.Thefox'seyesstaredupward,glazed,overwithasortof

shockedlookaboutthem,likethefoxcouldn'tbelievethiswashappening.Nausea built up in my stomach, but I forced myself to keep looking. I

couldn't afford to be squeamish. I'd be killing Strigoi someday. If I couldn'thandleafox,I'dneversurvivemajorkills.

What had happened to the fox was sick and twisted, obviously done bysomeone too fucked up forwords. Lissa stared at it, her face death-pale, andtookafewstepstowardit,handinvoluntarilyreachingout.Thisgrossacthitherhard, I knew, digging at her love of animals. She loved them, they loved her.Whileonourown,she'doftenbeggedmeforapet,butI'dalwaysrefusedandreminded her we couldn't take care of one when we might have to flee at amoment's notice. Plus, theyhatedme.So she'd contentedherselfwith helpingandpatchingup strays she foundandmaking friendswithotherpeople's pets,likeOscarthecat.

Shecouldn'tpatchthisfoxup,though.Therewasnocomingbackforit,butI saw inher face shewanted tohelp it, like shehelped everything. I tookherhand and steered her away, suddenly recalling a conversation from two yearsago.

"Whatisthat?Isitacrow?”"Toobig.It'saraven.”"Isitdead?”"Yeah.Definitelydead.Don'ttouchit.”Shehadn'tlistenedtomebackthen.Ihopedshewouldnow."Itwas still alivewhen Igotback,"Lissawhispered tome,clutchingmy

arm."Barely.OhGod,itwastwitching.Itmusthavesufferedsomuch.”Ifeltbileriseinmythroatnow.UndernocircumstanceswouldIthrowup.

"Didyou—?”"No.Iwantedto…Istartedto…”"Thenforgetaboutit,"Isaidsharply."It'sstupid.Somebody'sstupidjoke.

They'llcleanitup.Probablyevengiveyouanewroomifyouwant.”She turned tome, eyes almostwild. "Rose…doyou remember…that one

time…”"Stopit,"Isaid."Forgetaboutit.Thisisn'tthesamething.”"Whatifsomeonesaw?Whatifsomeoneknows?…”Itightenedmygriponherarm,diggingmynailsintogetherattention.She

flinched."No.It'snotthesame.Ithasnothingtodowiththat.Doyouhearme?"I could feel both Natalie and Dimitri's eyes on us. "It's going to be okay.Everything'sgoingtobeokay.”

Notlookinglikeshebelievedmeatall,Lissanodded."Get this cleaned up," Kirova snapped to the matron. "And find out if

anyonesawanything.”SomeonefinallyrealizedIwasthereandorderedDimitritotakemeaway,

nomatter howmuch I begged them to letme staywithLissa.Hewalkedmeback to the novices' dorm. He didn't speak until we were almost there. "Youknowsomething.Somethingaboutwhathappened.IsthiswhatyoumeantwhenyoutoldHeadmistressKirovathatLissawasindanger?"

"Idon'tknowanything.It'sjustsomesickjoke.""Doyouhaveanyideawho'ddoit?Orwhy?"I considered this. Before we'd left, it could have been any number of

people. That was the way it was when you were popular. People loved you,people hated you.But now?Lissa had faded off to a certain extent. The onlypersonwhoreallyandtrulydespisedherwasMia,butMiaseemedtofightherbattleswithwords,notactions.Andevenifshediddecidetodosomethingmoreaggressive, why do this? She didn't seem like the type. Therewere amillionotherwaystogetbackataperson."No,"Itoldhim."Noclue.”

"Rose, if youknow something, tellme.We're on the same side.Webothwanttoprotecther.Thisisserious.”

Ispunaround,takingmyangeroverthefoxoutonhim."Yeah,itisserious.It'sallserious.AndyouhavemedoinglapseverydaywhenIshouldbelearningtofightanddefendher!Ifyouwanttohelpher,thenteachmesomething!Teachmehowtofight.Ialreadyknowhowtorunaway.”

I didn't realize until that moment how badly I did want to learn, how Iwantedtoprovemyselftohim,toLissa,andtoeveryoneelse.Thefoxincidenthadmademe feel powerless, and I didn't like that. Iwanted to do something,anything.

Dimitri watched my outburst calmly, with no change in his expression.When I finished, he simply beckonedme forward like I hadn't said anything."Comeon.You'relateforpractice."

Eight

BURNINGWITHANGER, IFOUGHTharderandbetter thatday than Ieverhadinanyofmyclasseswiththenovices.SomuchsothatIfinallywonmyfirsthand-to-handpairing,annihilatingShaneReyes.We'dalwaysgottenalong,andhetookitgood-naturedly,applaudingmyperformance,asdidafewothers.

"Thecomeback'sstarting,"observedMasonafterclass."Soitwouldseem.”Hegentlytouchedmyarm."How'sLissa?”It didn't surprise me that he knew. Gossip spread so fast around here

sometimes,itfeltlikeeveryonehadapsychicbond."Okay. Coping." I didn't elaborate on how I knew that. Our bondwas a

secret fromthestudentbody."Mase,youclaim toknowaboutMia.You thinkshemighthavedonethat?”

"Whoa,hey, I'mnotanexpertonheroranything.Buthonestly?No.Miawon'tevendodissectionsinbiology.Ican'tpictureheractuallycatchingafox,letalone,um,killingit.”

"Anyfriendswhomightdoitforher?”He shook his head. "Not really. They're not really the types to get their

handsdirtyeither.Butwhoknows?”LissawasstillshakenwhenImetherforlunchlater,hermoodmadeworse

whenNatalieandhercrewwouldn't shutupabout the fox.ApparentlyNataliehad overcome her disgust enough to enjoy the attention the spectacle hadbrought her.Maybe shewasn't as contentwith her fringe status as I'd alwaysbelieved.

"And it was just there," she explained, waving her hands for emphasis."Rightinthemiddleofthebed.Therewasbloodeverywhere.”

Lissalookedasgreenasthesweatershewore,andIpulledherawaybeforeIeven finishedmy foodand immediately launched intoa stringofobscenitiesaboutNatalie'ssocialskills.

"She'snice,"Lissasaidautomatically."Youwere just tellingme theotherdayhowmuchyoulikedher.”

"Idolikeher,butshe'sjustincompetentaboutcertainthings.”Westoodoutsideouranimalbehaviorclass,andInoticedpeoplegivingus

curiouslooksandwhisperingastheypassed.Isighed."Howareyoudoingwithallthis?”Ahalf-smilecrossedherface."Can'tyoualreadyfeelit?”"Yeah,butIwanttohearitfromyou.”"Idon'tknow.I'llbeokay.Iwisheveryonewouldn'tkeepstaringatmelike

I'msomekindoffreak.”Myangerexplodedagain.The foxwasbad.Peopleupsettinghermade it

worse,butatleastIcoulddosomethingaboutthem."Who'sbotheringyou?”"Rose,youcan'tbeatupeveryonewehaveaproblemwith.”"Mia?"Iguessed."Andothers,"shesaidevasively."Look, itdoesn'tmatter.What Iwant to

knowishowthiscouldhave…thatis,Ican'tstopthinkingaboutthattime—”"Don't,"Iwarned."Whydoyoukeeppretending thatdidn't happen?Youof allpeople.You

madefunofNatalieforgoingonandon,butit'snotlikeyou'vegotagoodgriponyourcontrolswitch.You'llnormallytalkaboutanything.”

"Butnotthat.Weneedtoforgetaboutit.Itwasalongtimeago.Wedon'tevenreallyknowwhathappened.”

Shestaredatmewiththosebiggreeneyes,calculatinghernextargument."Hey,Rose.”Our conversation dropped as Jesse strolled up to us. I turned onmybest

smile."Hey.”HenoddedcordiallytoLissa."Sohey,I'mgoingtobeinyourdormtonight

forastudygroup.Youthink…maybe…”Momentarily forgetting Lissa, I focused my full attention on Jesse.

Suddenly, Isoneeded todosomethingwildandbad.Toomuchhadhappenedtoday."Sure.”

Hetoldmewhenhe'dbe there,andI toldhimI'dmeethiminoneof thecommonareaswith"furtherinstructions.”

Lissastaredatmewhenheleft."You'reunderhousearrest.Theywon'tletyouhangoutandtalktohim.”

"Idon'treallywantto'talk'tohim.We'llslipaway."Shegroaned."Ijustdon'tknowaboutyousometimes.""That'sbecauseyou'rethecautiousone,andI'mtherecklessone."

Once animal behavior started, I pondered the likelihood of Mia beingresponsible.Fromthesmuglookonherpsycho-angelface,shecertainlyseemedtobeenjoyingthesensationcausedbythebloodyfox.Butthatdidn'tmeanshewas the culprit, and after observingherover the last coupleofweeks, I knewshe'denjoyanythingthatupsetLissaandme.Shedidn'tneedtobetheonewhohaddoneit.

"Wolves,likemanyotherspecies,differentiatetheirpacksintoalphamales

and alpha females whom the others defer to. Alphas are almost always thestrongest physically, thoughmany times, confrontations turn out to bemore amatterofwillpowerandpersonality.Whenanalphaischallengedandreplaced,thatwolfmayfindhimselfostracizedfromthegrouporevenattacked.”

IlookedupfrommydaydreamsandfocusedonMs.Meissner."Mostchallengesarelikelytooccurduringmatingseason,"shecontinued.

This,naturally,brought snickers from theclass. "Inmostpacks, thealphapairare the only ones who mate. If the alpha male is an older, seasoned wolf, ayounger competitormay think he has a shot.Whether that is trueworks on acase-by-casebasis.Theyoungoftendon'trealizehowseriouslyoutclassedtheyarebythemoreexperienced.”

The old-and-young-wolf thing notwithstanding, I thought the rest waspretty relevant. Certainly in theAcademy's social structure, I decided bitterly,thereseemedtobealotofalphasandchallenges.

Miaraisedherhand."Whataboutfoxes?Dotheyhavealphastoo?”Therewasacollective intakeofbreath from theclass, followedbya few

nervousgiggles.NoonecouldbelieveMiahadgonethere.Ms.Meissner flushedwithwhat I suspectedwasanger. "We'rediscussing

wolvestoday,MissRinaldi.”Miadidn'tseemtomindthesubtlechastising,andwhentheclasspairedoff

toworkonanassignment,shespentmoretimelookingoveratusandgiggling.Throughthebond,IcouldfeelLissagrowingmoreandmoreupsetasimagesofthefoxkeptflashingthroughhermind.

"Don'tworry,"Itoldher."I'vegotaway—”"Hey,Lissa,"someoneinterrupted.We both looked up as Ralf Sarcozy stopped by our desks. He wore his

trademarkstupidgrin,andIhadafeelinghe'dcomeoverhereonadarefromhisfriends.

"So,admitit,"hesaid."Youkilledthefox.You'retryingtoconvinceKirovayou'recrazysothatyoucangetoutofhereagain.”

"Screwyou,"Itoldhiminalowvoice."Areyouoffering?”"FromwhatI'veheard,thereisn'tmuchtoscrew,"Ishotback."Wow," he saidmockingly. "You have changed. Last I remembered, you

weren'ttoopickyaboutwhoyougotnakedwith.”"AndthelastIremember,theonlypeopleyoueversawnakedwereonthe

Internet.”Hecockedhisheadinanoverlydramaticfashion."Hey,Ijustgotit:itwas

you,wasn'tit?"HelookedatLissa,thebackatme."Shegotyoutokillthefox,

didn'tshe?Someweirdkindoflesbianvoo—ahhh!”Ralfburstintoflames.I jumped up and pushedLissa out of theway—not easy to do, sincewe

weresittingatourdesks.Webothendeduponthefloorasscreams—Ralf's inparticular—filled the classroom and Ms. Meissner sprinted for the fireextinguisher.

And then, just like that, the flames disappeared.Ralfwas still screamingandpattinghimselfdown,buthedidn'thavea single singemarkonhim.Theonly indicationofwhathadhappenedwas the lingeringsmellof smoke in theair.

Forseveralseconds,theentireclassroomfroze.Then,slowly,everyoneputthe pieces together.Moroimagical specializationswerewell known, and afterscanningtheroom,Ideducedthreefireusers:Ralf,hisfriendJacob,and—

ChristianOzera.SinceneitherJacobnorRalfwouldhavesetRalfonfire,itsortofmadethe

culpritobvious.ThefactthatChristianwaslaughinghystericallysortofgaveitawaytoo.

Ms.Meissnerchangedfromredtodeeppurple."Mr.Ozera!"shescreamed."Howdareyou—doyouhaveanyidea—reporttoHeadmistressKirova'sofficenow!”

Christian, completelyunfazed, stoodup and slunghis backpackover oneshoulder.Thatsmirkstayedonhisface."Surething,Ms.Meissner.”

HewentoutofhiswaytowalkpastRalf,whoquicklybackedawayashepassed.Therestoftheclassstared,open-mouthed.

Afterthat,Ms.Meissnerattemptedtoreturntheclasstonormal,butitwasa lost cause. No one could stop talking about what had happened. It wasshockingonafewdifferentlevels.First,noonehadeverseenthatkindofspell:amassive fire thatdidn'tactuallyburnanything.Second,Christianhadused itoffensively.Hehadattackedanotherperson.Moroineverdidthat.Theybelievedmagicwasmeanttotakecareoftheearth,tohelppeoplelivebetterlives.Itwasnever, ever used as a weapon. Magic instructors never taught those kinds ofspells; I don't think they evenknewany.Finally, craziest of all,Christianhaddoneit.Christian,whomnooneevernoticedorgaveadamnabout.Well,they'dnoticedhimnow.

Itappearedsomeonestillknewoffensivespellsafterall,andasmuchasIhad enjoyed the look of terror onRalf's face, it suddenly occurred tome thatChristianmightreallyandtrulybeapsycho.

"Liss," Isaidaswewalkedoutofclass,"please tellmeyouhaven'thungoutwithhimagain.”

Theguiltthatflickeredthroughthebondtoldmemorethananyexplanationcould.

"Liss!"Igrabbedherarm."Notthatmuch,"shesaiduneasily."He'sreallyokay—”"Okay?Okay?"Peopleinthehallstaredatus.IrealizedIwaspractically

shouting. "He'soutofhismind.HesetRalfon fire. I thoughtwedecidedyouweren'tgoingtoseehimanymore.”

"Youdecided,Rose.Notme."TherewasanedgeinhervoiceIhadn'theardinawhile.

"What'sgoingonhere?Areyouguys…youknow?…”"No!" she insisted. "I toldyou that already.God."She shotme a lookof

disgust."Noteveryonethinks—andacts—likeyou.”I flinched at the words. Then we noticed that Mia was passing by. She

hadn'theardtheconversationbuthadcaughtthetone.Asnidesmilespreadoverherface."Troubleinparadise?”

"Gofindyourpacifier,andshutthehellup,"Itoldher,notwaitingtohearherresponse.Hermouthdroppedopen,thentightenedintoascowl.

Lissaand Iwalkedon in silence, and thenLissaburstout laughing.Likethat,ourfightdiffused.

"Rose…"Hertonewassofternow."Lissa,he'sdangerous.Idon'tlikehim.Pleasebecareful.”She touchedmy arm. "I am. I'm the cautious one, remember?You're the

recklessone.”Ihopedthatwasstilltrue.Butlater,afterschool,Ihadmydoubts.Iwasinmyroomdoinghomework

whenIfeltatrickleofwhatcouldonlybecalledsneakinesscomingfromLissa.Losing trackofmywork, I staredoff intospace, trying togetamoredetailedunderstandingofwhatwashappeningtoher.Ifevertherewasatimeformetoslipintohermind,itwasnow,butIdidn'tknowhowtocontrolthat.

Frowning, I tried to think what normally made that connection occur.Usuallyshewasexperiencingsomestrongemotion,anemotionsopowerful ittriedtoblastintomymind.Ihadtoworkhardtofightagainstthat;Ialwayssortofkeptamentalwallup.

Focusingonher now, I tried to remove thewall. I steadiedmybreathingandclearedmymind.Mythoughtsdidn'tmatter,onlyhersdid.Ineededtoopenmyselftoherandletusconnect.

I'd never done anything like this before; I didn't have the patience formeditation. My need was so strong, however, that I forced myself into anintense,focusedrelaxation.Ineededtoknowwhatwasgoingonwithher,and

afterafewmoremoments,myeffortpaidoff.Iwasin.

Nine

I SNAPPED INTO HER MIND, once again seeing and directlyexperiencingwhatwentonaroundher.

Shewassneakingintothechapel'satticagain,confirmingmyworstfears.Likelasttime,shemetnoresistance.GoodGod,Ithought,couldthatpriestbeanyworseaboutsecuringhisownchapel?

Sunrise lit up the stained-glass window, and Christian's silhouette wasframedagainstit:hewassittinginthewindowseat.

"You'relate,"hetoldher."Beenwaitingawhile.”Lissa pulled up one of the rickety chairs, brushing dust off it. "I figured

you'dbetiedupwithHeadmistressKirova.”Heshookhishead."Notmuchtoit.Theysuspendedmeforaweek,that's

all.Not like it's hard to sneakout."Hewavedhis hands around. "Asyou cansee.”

"I'msurprisedyoudidn'tgetmoretime.”Apatchofsunlightlituphiscrystal-blueeyes."Disappointed?”Shelookedshocked."Yousetsomeoneonfire!”"No,Ididn't.Didyouseeanyburnsonhim?”"Hewascoveredinflames.”"Ihadthemundercontrol.Ikeptthemoffofhim.”Shesighed."Youshouldn'thavedonethat.”Straighteningoutofhisloungingposition,hesatupandleanedtowardher.

"Ididitforyou.”"Youattackedsomeoneforme?”"Sure.HewasgivingyouandRoseahardtime.Shewasdoinganokayjob

againsthim,Iguess,butIfiguredshecouldusethebackup.Besides,this'llshutanyoneelseupaboutthewholefoxthing,too.”

"You shouldn't have done that," she repeated, looking away. She didn'tknowhowtofeelaboutthis"generosity.""Anddon'tactlikeitwasallforme.Youlikeddoingit.Partofyouwantedto—justbecause.”

Christian's smug expression dropped, replaced by one of uncharacteristicsurprise. Lissa might not be psychic, but she had a startling ability to readpeople.

Seeinghimoffguard,shecontinued."Attackingsomeoneelsewithmagicisforbidden—andthat'sexactlywhyyouwantedtodoit.Yougotathrilloutofit.”

"Those rulesarestupid. Ifweusedmagicasaweapon insteadof just forwarmandfuzzyshit,Strigoiwouldn'tkeepkillingsomanyofus.”

"It'swrong,"shesaidfirmly."Magicisagift.It'speaceful.”"Onlybecausetheysayitis.You'rerepeatingthepartylinewe'vebeenfed

ourwholelives."Hestoodupandpacedthesmallspaceoftheattic."Itwasn'talwaysthatway,youknow.Weusedtofight,rightalongwiththeguardians—centuries ago. Then people started getting scared and stopped. Figured it wassafertojusthide.Theyforgottheattackspells.”

"Thenhowdidyouknowthatone?”Hecrookedherasmile."Noteveryoneforgot.”"Likeyourfamily?Likeyourparents?”Thesmiledisappeared."Youdon'tknowanythingaboutmyparents.”His face darkened, his eyes grew hard. To most people, he might have

appearedscaryandintimidating,butasLissastudiedandadmiredhisfeatures,hesuddenlyseemedvery,veryvulnerable.

"You'reright,"sheadmittedsoftly,afteramoment."Idon't.I'msorry.”Forthesecondtimeinthismeeting,Christianlookedastonished.Probably

nooneapologizedtohimthatoften.Hell,nooneeventalkedtohimthatoften.Certainlynooneeverlistened.Likeusual,hequicklyturnedintohiscockyself.

"Forget it."Abruptly, he stoppedpacing andknelt in front of her so theycouldlookeachotherintheeye.Feelinghimsoclosemadeherholdherbreath.Adangeroussmilecurledhislips."Andreally,Idon'tgetwhyyouofallpeopleshouldactsooutragedthatIused'forbidden'magic.”

"Me'ofallpeople'?What'sthatsupposedtomean?”"Youcanplayallinnocentifyouwant—andyoudoaprettygoodjob—but

Iknowthetruth.”"Whattruthisthat?"Shecouldn'thideheruneasinessfrommeorChristian.Heleanedevencloser."Thatyouusecompulsion.Allthetime.”"No,Idon't,"shesaidimmediately."Ofcourseyoudo.I'vebeenlyingawakeatnight,tryingtofigureouthow

intheworldyoutwowereabletorentoutaplaceandgotohighschoolwithoutanyoneeverwantingtomeetyourparents.ThenIfigureditout.Youhadtobeusingcompulsion.That'sprobablyhowyoubrokeoutofhereinthefirstplace.”

"Isee.Youjustfigureditout.Withoutanyproof.”"I'vegotalltheproofIneed,justfromwatchingyou.”"You've been watching me—spying on me—to prove I'm using

compulsion?”Heshrugged."No.Actually, I'vebeenwatchingyoujustbecauseI like it.

The compulsion thing was a bonus. I saw you use it the other day to get anextensiononthatmathassignment.AndyouuseditonMs.Carmackwhenshewantedtomakeyougothroughmoretesting.”

"Soyouassumeit'scompulsion?MaybeI'mjustreallygoodatconvincingpeople."Therewasadefiantnoteinhervoice:understandable,consideringherfearandanger.Onlyshedelivered itwitha tossofherhairwhich—if Ididn'tknow any better—might have been considered flirtatious. And I did knowbetter…right?Suddenly,Iwasn'tsure.

Hewenton,butsomethinginhiseyestoldmehe'dnoticedthehair,thathealwaysnoticedeverythingabouther."Peoplegetthesegoofylooksontheirfaceswhenyoutalktothem.Andnotjustanypeople—you'reabletodoittoMoroi.Probablydhampirs,too.Nowthat'scrazy.Ididn'tevenknowthatwaspossible.You're some kind of superstar. Some kind of evil, compulsion-abusingsuperstar." It was an accusation, but his tone and presence radiated the sameflirtatiousnessshehad.

Lissadidn'tknowwhattosay.Hewasright.Everythinghe'dsaidwasright.Hercompulsionwaswhathadallowedustododgeauthorityandgetalongintheworldwithoutadulthelp.Itwaswhathadallowedustoconvincethebanktolethertapintoherinheritance.

Anditwasconsideredeverybitaswrongasusingmagicasaweapon.Whynot? Itwas aweapon.A powerful one, one that could be abused very easily.Moroichildrenhad itdrilled into themfromanearlyage thatcompulsionwasvery,verywrong.Noonewastaughttouseit, thougheveryMoroitechnicallyhad the ability. Lissa had just sort of stumbled into it— deeply—and, asChristianhadpointedout,shecouldwielditoverMoroi,aswellashumansanddhampirs.

"Whatareyougoingtodothen?"sheasked."Yougoingtoturnmein?”Heshookhisheadandsmiled."No.Ithinkit'shot.”Shestared,eyeswideningandheartracing.Somethingabout theshapeof

hislipsintriguedher."Rosethinksyou'redangerous,"sheblurtedoutnervously."Shethinksyoumighthavekilledthefox.”

Ididn'tknowhowIfeltaboutbeingdraggedintothisbizarreconversation.Somepeoplewerescaredofme.Maybehewastoo.

Judging from the amusement in his voicewhen he spoke, it appeared hewasn't. "People think I'munstable, but I tell you,Rose is ten timesworse.Ofcourse, that makes it harder for people to fuck with you, so I'm all for it."Leaning back on his heels, he finally broke the intimate space between them."AndIsureashelldidn'tdothat.Findoutwhodid,though…andwhatIdidtoRalfwon'tseemlikeanything.”

Hisgallantofferofcreepyvengeancedidn'texactlyreassureLissa…butitdidthrillheralittle."Idon'twantyoudoinganythinglikethat.AndIstilldon'tknowwhodidit.”

Heleanedbacktowardherandcaughtherwristsinhishands.Hestartedtosay something, then stopped and lookeddown in surprise, runninghis thumbsoverfaint,barelytherescars.Lookingbackupather,hehadastrange—forhim—kindnessinhisface.

"Youmightnotknowwhodidit.Butyouknowsomething.Somethingyouaren'ttalkingabout.”

Shestaredathim,aswirlofemotionsplayinginherchest."Youcan'tknowallmysecrets,"shemurmured.

Heglancedbackdownatherwristsandthenreleasedthem,thatdrysmileofhisbackonhisface."No.Iguessnot.”

Afeelingofpeacesettledoverher,afeelingI thoughtonlyIcouldbring.Returningtomyownheadandmyroom,Isatonthefloorstaringatmymathbook.Then,forreasonsIdidn'treallyget,Islammeditshutandthrewitagainstthewall.

IspenttherestofthenightbroodinguntilthetimeIwassupposedtomeetJessecamearound.Slippingdownstairs,Iwentintothekitchen—aplaceIcouldvisitso longasIkept thingsbrief—andcaughthiseyewhenIcut throughthemainvisitingarea.

Movingpasthim,Ipausedandwhispered,"There'saloungeonthefourthfloor that nobodyuses.Take the stairs on theother sideof thebathroomsandmeetmethereinfiveminutes.Thelockonthedoorisbroken.”

He complied to the second, and we found the lounge dark, dusty, anddeserted.Thedropinguardiannumbersovertheyearsmeantalotofthedormstayedempty,asadsignforMoroisocietybutterriblyconvenientrightnow.

Hesatdownonthecouch,andIlaybackonit,puttingmyfeetinhislap.Iwas still annoyed afterLissa andChristian's bizarre attic romance andwantednothingmorethantoforgetaboutitforawhile.

"Youreallyheretostudy,orwasitjustanexcuse?"Iasked."No.Itwasreal.HadtodoanassignmentwithMeredith."Thetoneinhis

voiceindicatedhewasn'thappyaboutthat."Oooh," I teased. "Isworkingwith a dhampir beneath your royal blood?

ShouldIbeoffended?”Hesmiled,showingamouthfullofperfectwhiteteethandfangs."You'rea

lothotterthansheis.”"Glad I make the cut." There was a sort of a heat in his eyes that was

turningmeon,aswashishandslidingupmyleg.ButIneededtodosomethingfirst.Itwastimeforsomevengeance."Miamusttoo,sinceyouguysletherhang

outwithyou.She'snotroyal.”Hisfingerplayfullypokedmeinthecalf."She'swithAaron.AndI'vegot

lots of friendswho aren't royal. And friendswho are dhamps. I'm not a totalasshole.”

"Yeah, but did you know her parents are practically custodians for theDrozdovs?”

Thehandonmylegstopped.I'dexaggerated,buthewasasuckerforgossip—andhewasnotoriousforspreadingit.

"Seriously?”"Yeah.Scrubbingfloorsandstufflikethat.”"Huh.”Icouldseethewheelsturninginhisdarkblueeyesandhadtohideasmile.

Theseedwasplanted.Sittingup,Imovedclosertohimanddrapedalegoverhislap.Iwrapped

myarmsaroundhim,andwithoutfurtherdelay,thoughtsofMiadisappearedashis testosteronekicked in.Hekissedmeeagerly—sloppily, even—pushingmeagainst the back of the couch, and I relaxed into what had to be the firstenjoyablephysicalactivityI'dhadinweeks.

Wekissedlikethatforalongtime,andIdidn'tstophimwhenhepulledoffmyshirt.

"I'mnothavingsex,"Iwarnedbetweenkisses.Ihadnointentionoflosingmyvirginityonacouchinalounge.

Hepaused,thinkingaboutthis,andfinallydecidednottopushit."Okay.”But he pushed me onto the couch, lying over me, still kissing with that

samefierceness.Hislipstraveleddowntomyneck,andwhenthesharppointsofhisfangsbrushedagainstmyskin,Icouldn'thelpanexcitedgasp.

He raised himself up, looking into my face with open surprise. For amoment, I could barely breathe, recalling that rush of pleasure that a vampirebitecouldfillmewith,wonderingwhatit'dbeliketofeelthatwhilemakingout.Thentheoldtabooskickedin.Evenifwedidn'thavesex,givingbloodwhilewedidthiswasstillwrong,stilldirty.

"Don't,"Iwarned."Youwantto."Hisvoiceheldexcitedwonder."Icantell.”"No,Idon't.”Hiseyeslitup."Youdo.How—hey,haveyoudoneitbefore?”"No,"Iscoffed."Ofcoursenot.”Thosegorgeousblueeyeswatchedme,andIcouldseethewheelsspinning

behindthem.Jessemightflirtalotandhaveabigmouth,buthewasn'tstupid."Youactlikeyouhave.YougotexcitedwhenIwasbyyourneck.”

"You're a good kisser," I countered, though it wasn't entirely true. Hedrooled a littlemore than I would have preferred. "Don't you think everyonewouldknowifIwasgivingblood?”

The realization seized him. "Unless youweren't doing it before you left.Youdiditwhileyouweregone,didn'tyou?YoufedLissa.”

"Ofcoursenot,"Irepeated.But hewas on to something, and he knew it. "Itwas the onlyway.You

didn'thavefeeders.Oh,man.”"She found some," I lied. Itwas the same linewe'd fedNatalie, the one

she'd spread around and that no one—except Christian—had ever questioned."Plentyofhumansareintoit.”

"Sure,"hesaidwithasmile.Heleanedhismouthbacktomyneck."I'mnotabloodwhore,"Isnapped,pullingawayfromhim."Butyouwantto.Youlikeit.Allyoudhampgirlsdo."Histeethwereon

myskinagain.Sharp.Wonderful.I had a feeling hostilitywould onlymake thingsworse, so I defused the

situationwithteasing."Stopit,"Isaidgently,runningafingertipoverhislips."Itoldyou,I'mnotlikethat.Butifyouwantsomethingtodowithyourmouth,Icangiveyousomeideas.”

Thatpeakedhisinterest."Yeah?Likewha—?”Andthatwaswhenthedooropened.Wesprangapart.Iwasreadytohandleafellowstudentorevenpossiblythe

matron.WhatIwasnotreadyforwasDimitri.He burst in the door like he'd expected to find us, and in that horrible

moment,withhimraginglikeastorm,IknewwhyMasonhadcalledhimagod.In the blink of an eye, he crossed the room and jerked Jesse up by his shirt,nearlyholdingtheMoroiofftheground.

"What'syourname?"barkedDimitri."J-Jesse,sir.JesseZeklos,sir.”"Mr.Zeklos,doyouhavepermissiontobeinthispartofthedorm?”"No,sir.”"Doyouknowtherulesaboutmaleandfemaleinteractionsaroundhere?”"Yes,sir.”"ThenIsuggestyougetoutofhereasfastasyoucanbeforeIturnyouover

tosomeonewhowillpunishyouaccordingly.IfIeverseeyoulikethisagain"—Dimitripointed towhereIcowered,half-dressed,on thecouch—"Iwillbe theonetopunishyou.Anditwillhurt.Alot.Doyouunderstand?”

Jesse swallowed, eyeswide.Noneof thebravadoheusually showedwasthere.Iguesstherewas"usually"andthentherewasbeingheldinthegripofa

reallyripped,reallytall,andreallypissed-offRussianguy"Yes,sir!”"Thengo."Dimitri released him, and, if possible, Jesse got out of there

fasterthanDimitrihadburstin.Mymentorthenturnedtome,adangerousglintinhiseyes.Hedidn't sayanything,but theangry,disapprovingmessagecamethroughloudandclear.

Andthenitshifted.Itwasalmost likehe'dbeen takenbysurprise, likehe'dnevernoticedme

before.Haditbeenanyotherguy,Iwouldhavesaidhewascheckingmeout.Asit was, he was definitely studying me. Studying my face, my body. And Isuddenly realized I was only in jeans and a bra—a black bra at that. I knewperfectlywellthatthereweren'talotofgirlsatthisschoolwholookedasgoodinabraasIdid.EvenaguylikeDimitri,onewhoseemedsofocusedondutyandtrainingandallofthat,hadtoappreciatethat.

And,finally,Inoticedthatahotflushwasspreadingoverme,andthatthelookinhiseyeswasdoingmoretomethanJesse'skisseshad.Dimitriwasquietand distant sometimes, but he also had a dedication and an intensity that I'dneverseeninanyotherperson.Iwonderedhowthatkindofpowerandstrengthtranslatedinto…well,sex.Iwonderedwhatit'dbelikeforhimtotouchmeand—shit!

WhatwasI thinking?WasIoutofmymind?Embarrassed, Icoveredmyfeelingswithattitude.

"Youseesomethingyoulike?"Iasked."Getdressed.”Thesetofhismouthhardened,andwhateverhe'djustfeltwasgone.That

fiercenesssoberedmeupandmademeforgetaboutmyowntroublingreaction.Iimmediatelypulledmyshirtbackon,uneasyatseeinghisbadassside.

"How'dyoufindme?YoufollowingmetomakesureIdon'trunaway?”"Be quiet," he snapped, leaning down so that we were at eye level. "A

janitorsawyouandreportedit.Doyouhaveanyideahowstupidthiswas?”"Iknow,Iknow,thewholeprobationthing,right?”"Not just that. I'm talking about the stupidity of getting in that kind of

situationinthefirstplace.”"Iget in thatkindof situationall the time,Comrade. It's not abigdeal."

Angerreplacedmyfear.Ididn'tlikebeingtreatedlikeachild."Stop calling me that. You don't know even know what you're talking

about.”"SureIdo.IhadtodoareportonRussiaandtheR.S.S.R.lastyear.”"U.S.S.R.AnditisabigdealforaMoroitobewithadhampirgirl.They

liketobrag.”

"So?”"So?"he looked disgusted. "So don't you have any respect? Think about

Lissa.Youmakeyourselflookcheap.Youliveuptowhatalotofpeoplealreadythinkaboutdhampirgirls,anditreflectsbackonher.Andme.”

"Oh, I see. Is that what this is about? Am I hurting your big, bad malepride?AreyouafraidI'llruinyourreputation?”

"Myreputation isalreadymade,Rose. I setmystandardsand livedup tothemlongago.Whatyoudowithyoursremainstobeseen."Hisvoicehardenedagain. "Now get back to your room—if you can manage it without throwingyourselfatsomeoneelse.”

"Isthatyoursubtlewayofcallingmeaslut?”"Ihearthestoriesyouguystell.I'veheardstoriesaboutyou.”Ouch.IwantedtoyellbackthatitwasnoneofhisbusinesswhatIdidwith

mybody,but somethingabout theangeranddisappointmentonhis facemademefalter.Ididn'tknowwhatitwas."Disappointing"someonelikeKirovawasanon-event,butDimitri?…IrememberedhowproudI'dfeltwhenhepraisedmethe last few times in our practices. Seeing that disappear from him…well, itsuddenlymademefeelascheapashe'dimpliedIwas.

Somethingbrokeinsideofme.Blinkingbacktears,Isaid,"Whyisitwrongto…Idon'tknow,havefun?I'mseventeen,youknow.Ishouldbeabletoenjoyit.”

"You'reseventeen,andinlessthanayear,someone'slifeanddeathwillbeinyourhands."Hisvoicestillsoundedfirm,buttherewasagentlenesstheretoo."IfyouwerehumanorMoroi,youcouldhave fun.Youcoulddo thingsothergirlscould.”

"Butyou'resayingIcan't.”Heglancedaway,andhisdarkeyeswentunfocused.Hewasthinkingabout

somethingfarawayfromhere."WhenIwasseventeen,ImetIvanZeklos.Weweren't likeyouandLissa,butwebecamefriends,andherequestedmeashisguardianwhenIgraduated.Iwasthetopstudentinmyschool.Ipaidattentiontoeverythinginmyclasses,butintheend,itwasn'tenough.That'showitisinthislife.Oneslip,onedistraction…"Hesighed."Andit'stoolate.”

AlumpformedinmythroatasIthoughtaboutonesliporonedistractioncostingLissaherlife.

"Jesse'saZeklos,"Isaid,suddenlyrealizingDimitrihadjustthrownaroundarelativeofhisformerfriendandcharge.

"Iknow.”"Doesitbotheryou?DoesheremindyouofIvan?”"Itdoesn'tmatterhowIfeel.Itdoesn'tmatterhowanyofusfeel.”

"But itdoesbotheryou."Itsuddenlybecameveryobvious tome.Icouldreadhispain, thoughhe clearlyworkedhard tohide it. "Youhurt.Everyday.Don'tyou?Youmisshim.”

Dimitri looked surprised, like he didn't want me to know that, like I'duncovered some secret part of him. I'd been thinking he was some aloof,antisocial toughguy,butmaybehekepthimselfapart fromotherpeoplesohewouldn'tgethurtifhelostthem.Ivan'sdeathhadclearlyleftapermanentmark.

IwonderedifDimitriwaslonely.The surprised look vanished, and his standard serious one returned. "It

doesn'tmatterhowIfeel.Theycomefirst.Protectingthem.”IthoughtaboutLissaagain."Yeah.Theydo.”Alongsilencefellbeforehespokeagain."Youtoldmeyouwanttofight,toreallyfight.Isthatstilltrue?”"Yes.Absolutely.”"Rose…I can teach you, but I have to believe you're dedicated. Really

dedicated.Ican'thaveyoudistractedbythingslikethis."Hegesturedaroundthelounge."CanItrustyou?”

Again,Ifelt likecryingunder thatgaze,under theseriousnessofwhatheasked. I didn't get howhe couldhave suchapowerful effect onme. I'dnevercaredsomuchaboutwhatonepersonthought."Yes.Ipromise.”

"All right. I'll teach you, but I need you strong. I know you hate therunning,but it really isnecessary.Youhaveno ideawhatStrigoiare like.Theschool tries toprepareyou,butuntilyou'veseenhowstrongtheyareandhowfast…well, you can't even imagine. So I can't stop the running and theconditioning. If youwant to learnmore about fighting, we need to addmoretrainings. It'll take upmore of your time. Youwon't havemuch left for yourhomeworkoranythingelse.You'llbetired.Alot.”

Ithoughtaboutit,abouthim,andaboutLissa."Itdoesn'tmatter.Ifyoutellmetodoit,I'lldoit.”

Hestudiedmehard,likehewasstilltryingtodecideifhecouldbelieveme.Finallysatisfied,hegavemeasharpnod."We'llstarttomorrow"

TEN

“EXCUSEME,MRNAGY? I CANT really concentrate with Lissa andRosepassingnotesoverthere.”

Miawasattemptingtodistractattentionfromherself—aswellasfromherinabilitytoanswerMr.Nagy'squestion—anditwasruiningwhathadotherwisebeenapromisingday.Afewofthefoxrumorsstillcirculated,butmostpeoplewanted to talkaboutChristianattackingRalf. I stillhadn'tclearedChristianofthe fox incident—Iwas pretty sure hewas psycho enough to have done it assomecrazysignofaffectionforLissa—butwhateverhismotives,hehadshiftedtheattentionoffher,justashe'dsaid.

Mr.Nagy legendary for his ability to humiliate students by readingnotesaloud,homedinonuslikeamissile.Hesnatchedthenoteaway,andtheexcitedclasssettledinforafullreading.Iswallowedmygroan,tryingtolookasblankandunconcernedaspossible.Besideme,Lissalookedlikeshewantedtodie.

"My,my,"hesaid,lookingthenoteover."Ifonlystudentswouldwritethismuchintheiressays.Oneofyouhasconsiderablyworsewritingthantheother,soforgivemeifIgetanythingwronghere."Heclearedhisthroat."'So,IsawJlast night,'begins the personwith bad handwriting, towhich the response is,'What happened,' followed by no fewer than five question marks.Understandable, since sometimesone—letalone four—justwon'tget thepointacross, eh?" The class laughed, and I noticedMia throwingme a particularlymeansmile."Thefirstspeakerresponds:

'Whatdoyouthinkhappened?Wehookedupinoneoftheemptylounges.'“Mr. Nagy glanced up after hearing some more giggles in the room. His

Britishaccentonlyaddedtothehilarity."MayIassumebythisreactionthattheuseof'hookup'pertainstothemore

recent,shallwesay,carnalapplicationofthetermthanthetameroneIgrewupwith?”

Moresnickersensued.Straighteningup,Isaidboldly,"Yes,sir,Mr.Nagy.Thatwouldbecorrect,sir."Anumberofpeopleintheclasslaughedoutright.

"Thankyouforthatconfirmation,MissHathaway.Now,wherewasI?Ahyes, the other speaker then asks, 'How was it?' The response is, 'Good,'punctuatedwithasmileyfacetoconfirmsaidadjective.Well. Isupposekudosare inorder for themysterious J,hmmm? 'So, like,how fardidyouguysgo?'Uh,ladies,"saidMr.Nagy,"Idohopethisdoesn'tsurpassaPGrating.'Notvery.Wegotcaught.'Andagain,weareshowntheseverityofthesituation,thistimethroughtheuseofanot-smilingface.'Whathappened?''Dimitrishowedup.HethrewJesseoutandthenbitchedmeout.'“

Theclasslostit,bothfromhearingMr.Nagysay"bitched"andfromfinallygettingsomeparticipantsnamed.

"Why,Mr. Zeklos, are you the aforementioned J? The onewho earned asmiley face fromthesloppywriter?"Jesse's face turnedbeet red,buthedidn'tlook entirely displeased at having his exploits made known in front of hisfriends.He'dkeptwhathadhappenedasecretthusfar—includingthebloodtalk—because I suspected Dimitri had scared the hell out of him. "Well, while Iapplaudagoodmisadventureasmuchasthenextteacherwhosetimeisutterlywasted,doremindyour'friends'inthefuturethatmyclassisnotachatroom."HetossedthepaperbackontoLissa'sdesk."MissHathaway,itseemsthere'snofeasiblewaytopunishyou,sinceyou'realreadymaxedoutonpenaltiesaroundhere. Ergo, you,Miss Dragomir, will serve two detentions instead of one onbehalfofyourfriend.Stayherewhenthebellrings,please."

After class, Jesse foundme, anuneasy lookonhis face. "Hey,um,aboutthatnote…youknowIdidn'thaveanythingtodowiththat.IfBelikovfindsoutaboutit…you'lltellhim?Imean,you'lllethimknowIdidn't—”

"Yeah,yeah,"Iinterruptedhim."Don'tworry,you'resafe.”Standingwithme,Lissawatchedhimwalk out of the room.Thinking of

howeasilyDimitrihad thrownhimaround—andofhisapparentcowardice—Icouldn't help but remark, "You know, Jesse's suddenly not as hot as I used tothink.”

Sheonlylaughed."You'dbettergo.I'vegotdeskstowash.”I left her, heading back for my dorm. As I did, I passed a number of

students gathered in small clusters outside the building. I regarded themwistfully,wishingIhadthefreetimetosocialize.

"No,it'strue,"Iheardaconfidentvoicesay.CamilleConta.Beautifulandpopular, fromone of themost prestigious families in theConta clan. She andLissahad sortofbeen friendsbeforewe left, in theuneasyway twopowerfulforceskeepaneyeoneachother."They,like,cleantoiletsorsomething."

"OhmyGod,"herfriendsaid."I'ddieifIwasMia.”Ismiled.ApparentlyJessehadspreadsomeofthestoriesI'dtoldhimlast

night.Unfortunately,thenextoverheardconversationshatteredmyvictory."—hearditwasstillalive.Like,twitchingonherbed.""Thatissogross.Whywouldtheyjustleaveitthere?""Idon'tknow.Whykillitinthefirstplace?""YouthinkRalfwasright?ThatsheandRosedidittogetkicked—”Theysawmeandshutup.Scowling,Iskulkedoffacrossthequadrangle.Stillalive,stillalive.I'drefusedtoletLissatalkaboutthesimilaritiesbetweenthefoxandwhat

hadhappenedtwoyearsago.Ididn'twanttobelievetheywereconnected,andIcertainlydidn'twanthertoeither.

ButIhadn'tbeenabletostopthinkingaboutthatincident,notonlybecauseitwaschilling,butbecauseitreallydidremindmeofwhathadjusthappenedinherroom.

Wehadbeenout in thewoodsnear campusone evening, having skippedoutonourlastclass.I'dtradedapairofcute,rhinestone-studdedsandalstoAbbyBadicaforabottleofpeachschnapps—desperate,yes,butyoudidwhatyouhadtoinMontana—whichshe'dsomehowgottenholdof.Lissahadshakenherheadin disapproval when I suggested cutting class to go put the bottle out of itsmisery,butshe'dcomealonganyway.Likealways.

Wefoundanoldlogtositonnearascummygreenmarsh.Ahalf-mooncastatinysliveroflightonus,butitwasmorethanenoughforvampiresandhalf-vampires to see by. Passing the bottle back and forth, I grilled her onAaron.She'dfessedupthatthetwoofthemhadhadsextheweekendbefore,andIfeltasurgeofjealousythatshe'dbeentheonetohavesexfirst.

"Sowhatwasitlike?”Sheshruggedandtookanotherdrink."Idon'tknow.Itwasn'tanything.”"Whatdoyoumeanitwasn'tanything?Didn'ttheearthmoveortheplanets

alignorsomething?”"No,"shesaid,smotheringalaugh."Ofcoursenot.”

Ididn'treallygetwhythatshouldbefunny,butIcouldtellshedidn'twanttotalkaboutit.Thiswasaroundthetimethebondhadbegunforming,andheremotionswerestartingtocreepintomenowandthen.Iheldupthebottleandglaredatit.

"Idon'tthinkthisstuffisworking.”"That'sbecausethere'sbarelyanyalcoholin—”The sound of something moving in the brush came from nearby. I

immediatelyshotup,puttingmybodybetweenherandthenoise."It'ssomeanimal,"shesaidwhenaminutewentbyinsilence.Thatdidn'tmeanitwasn'tdangerous.Theschool'swardskeptoutStrigoi,

butwildanimalsoftenwanderedintotheoutskirtsofcampus,posingtheirownthreats.Bears.Cougars.

"Comeon,"Itoldher."Let'sheadback.”We hadn't gone very far when I heard something moving again, and

someonesteppedoutintoourpath."Ladies.”Ms.Karp.We froze, and whatever quick reactions I'd shown back by the marsh

disappearedasIdelayedafewmomentsinhidingthebottlebehindmyback.Ahalf-smilecrossedherface,andsheheldoutherhand.Sheepishly, Igave thebottle toher, andshe tucked itunderherarm.She

turned without another word, and we followed, knowing there would beconsequencestodealwith.

"Youthinknoonenoticeswhenhalfaclassisgone?"sheaskedafteralittlewhile.

"Halfaclass?”"A fewof you apparently chose today to skip.Must be the niceweather.

Springfever.”Lissa and I trudged along. I'd never been comfortable aroundMs. Karp

sincethetimeshe'dhealedmyhands.Herweird,paranoidbehaviorhadtakenona strange quality tome—a lot stranger than before. Scary, even.And lately Icouldn't lookatherwithout seeing thosemarksbyher forehead.Herdeep redhair usually covered them but not always. Sometimes there were newmarks;sometimestheoldonesfadedtonothing.

Aweirdflutteringnoisesoundedtomyright.Weallstopped."Oneofyourclassmates,I imagine,"murmuredMs.Karp, turningtoward

thesound.Butwhenwereachedthespot,wefoundalargeblackbirdlyingontheon

theground.Birds—andmostanimals—didn'tdoanythingforme,butevenIhadto admire its sleek feathers and fiercebeak. It couldprobablypeck someone's

eyesoutinthirtyseconds—ifitweren'tobviouslydying.Withalast,halfheartedshake,thebirdfinallywentstill.

"Whatisthat?Isitacrow?"Iasked."Toobig,"saidMs.Karp."It'saraven.”"Isitdead?"askedLissa.Ipeeredatit."Yeah.Definitelydead.Don'ttouchit.”"Probablyattackedbyanotherbird,"observedMs.Karp."Theyfightover

territoryandresourcessometimes.”Lissa knelt down, compassiononher face. Iwasn't surprised, since she'd

alwayshadathingforanimals.She'dlecturedmefordaysafterI'dinstigatedtheinfamous hamster-and-hermit-crab fight. I'd viewed the fight as a testing ofworthyopponents.She'dseenitasanimalcruelty.

Transfixed,shereachedtowardtheraven."Liss!"Iexclaimed,horrified."It'sprobablygotadisease.”But her handmoved out like she hadn't even heardme.Ms. Karp stood

therelikeastatue,herwhitefacelookinglikeaghost's.Lissa'sfingersstrokedtheraven'swings.

"Liss,"Irepeated,startingtomovetowardher,topullherback.Suddenly,astrangesensationfloodedthroughmyhead,asweetness thatwasbeautifulandfulloflife.Thefeelingwassointense,itstoppedmeinmytracks.

Thentheravenmoved.Lissa gave a small scream and snatched her hand back. We both stared

wide-eyed.The raven flapped its wings, slowly trying to right itself and stand up.

When itmanaged to do so, it turned toward us, fixing Lissawith a look thatseemed too intelligent for a bird, its eyes held hers, and I couldn't read herreactionthroughthebond.Atlonglast,theravenbrokethegazeandliftedintotheair,strongwingscarryingitaway.

Windstirringtheleaveswastheonlysoundleft."OhmyGod,"breathedLissa."Whatjusthappened?”"HellifIknow,"Isaid,hidingmystarkterror.Ms.KarpstrodeforwardandgrabbedLissa'sarm,forcefullyturningherso

that theyfacedeachother. Iwas there ina flash, ready to takeaction ifCrazyKarptriedanything,thoughevenIhadqualmsabouttakingdownateacher.

"Nothing happened," said Ms. Karp in an urgent voice, her eyes wild-looking."Doyouhearme?Nothing.Andyoucan'ttellanyone—

anyone—aboutwhatyousaw.Bothofyou.Promiseme.Promisemeyouwon'tevertalkaboutthisagain.”

LissaandIexchangeduneasyglances."Okay"shecroakedout.Ms. Karp's grip relaxed a little. "And don't ever do it again. If you do,

they'llfindout.They'lltrytofindyou."Sheturnedtome."Youcan'tletherdoit.Noteveragain."

Onthequad,outsidemydorm,someonewassayingmyname."Hey,Rose?I'vecalledyou,like,ahundredtimes.”IforgotaboutMs.KarpandtheravenandglancedoveratMason,whohad

apparentlystartedwalkingwithmetowardthedormwhileIwasoffinla-laland."Sorry,"Imumbled."I'moutofit.Just…um,tired.”"Toomuchexcitementlastnight?”Igavehimanarrow-eyedlook."NothingIcouldn'thandle.”"Iguess,"helaughed,thoughhedidn'texactlysoundamused."Soundslike

Jessecouldn'thandleit.”"Hedidokay.”"Ifyousayso.Butpersonally,Ithinkyou'vegotbadtaste.”Istoppedwalking."AndIdon'tthinkit'sanyofyourbusiness.”Helookedawayangrily."Youmadeitthewholeclass'sbusiness.”"Hey,Ididn'tdothatonpurpose.”"Would'vehappenedanyway.Jesse'sgotabigmouth.”"Hewouldn'thavetold.”"Yeah," said Mason. "Because he's so cute and has such an important

family.”"Stopbeinganidiot,"Isnapped."Andwhydoyouevencare?JealousI'm

notdoingitwithyou?”His flushgrew,goingall theway to therootsofhis redhair."I justdon't

likehearingpeopletalkshitaboutyou,that'sall.Therearealotofnastyjokesgoingaround.They'recallingyouaslut.”

"Idon'tcarewhattheycallme.”"Oh,yeah.You'rereallytough.Youdon'tneedanyone.”Istopped."Idon't.I'moneofthebestnovicesinthisfuckingplace.Idon't

needyouactingall gallant andcoming tomydefense.Don't treatme like I'msomehelplessgirl.”

Iturnedaroundandkeptwalking,buthecaughtuptomeeasily.Thewoesofbeingfive-seven.

"Look…Ididn'tmeantoupsetyou.I'mjustworriedaboutyou.”

Igaveaharshlaugh."I'm serious.Wait…" he began. "I, uh, did something for you. Sort of. I

wenttothelibrarylastnightandtriedtolookupSt.Vladimir,”Istoppedagain."Youdid?”"Yeah,buttherewasn'tmuchonAnna.Allthebookswerekindofgeneric.

Just talked about him healing people, bringing them back from the edge ofdeath.”

Thatlastparthitanerve."Was…wasthereanythingelse?"Istammered.Heshookhishead."No.Youprobablyneedsomeprimarysources,butwe

don'thaveanyhere.”"Primarywhat?”Hescoffed,asmilebreakingoverhis face."Doyoudoanythingbutpass

notes?WejusttalkedaboutthemtheotherdayinAndrews'class.They'rebooksfrom the actual timeperiodyouwant to study.Secondaryones arewritten bypeople living today.You'llgetbetter information ifyoufindsomethingwrittenbytheguyhimself.Orsomeonewhoactuallyknewhim.”

"Huh.Okay.Whatareyou,like,aboygeniusnow?”Masongavemealightpunchinthearm."Ipayattention,that'sall.You're

sooblivious.Youmissallsortsof things."Hesmilednervously."Andlook…IreallyamsorryaboutwhatIsaid.Iwasjust—”

Jealous,Irealized.Icouldseeitinhiseyes.HowhadInevernoticedthisbefore?Hewascrazyaboutme.IguessIreallywasoblivious.

"It'sallright,Mase.Forgetaboutit."Ismiled."Andthanksforlookingthatstuffup.”

Hesmiledback,andIwentinside,sadthatIdidn'tfeelthesamewayabouthim.

Eleven

"YOUNEEDSOMETHINGTOWEAR?"Lissaasked."Hmm?”Iglancedover at her.Wewerewaiting forMr.Nagy'sSlavic art class to

start, and Iwas preoccupiedwith listening toMia adamantly deny the claimsaboutherparentstooneofherfriends.

"It'snotlikethey'reservantsoranything,"sheexclaimed,clearlyflustered.Straighteningher face, she tried for haughtiness. "They're practically advisors.TheDrozdovsdon'tdecideanythingwithoutthem.”

Ichokedonalaugh,andLissashookherhead."You'reenjoyingthiswaytoomuch.”"Because it's awesome.What'd you just askme?" I dug throughmybag,

messily lookingformylipgloss. ImadeafacewhenIfoundit. Itwasalmostempty;Ididn'tknowwhereIwasgoingtoscoresomemore.

"Iaskedifyouneedsomethingtoweartonight,"shesaid."Well,yeah,ofcourseIdo.Butnoneofyourstufffitsme.”"Whatareyougoingtodo?”I shrugged my shoulders. "Improvise, like always. I don't really care

anyway.I'mjustgladKirova'slettingmego.”Wehadanassemblytonight.ItwasNovember1,AllSaints’Day—which

alsomeantwe'dbeenbackalmostamonthnow.Aroyalgroupwasvisitingtheschool,includingQueenTatianaherself.Honestly,thatwasn'twhatexcitedme.She'dvisitedtheAcademybefore.Itwasprettycommonandalotlesscoolthanitsounded.Besides,afterlivingamonghumansandelectedleaders,Ididn'tthinkmuch of stiff royals. Still, I'd gotten permission to go because everyone elsewouldbethere.Itwasachancetohangoutwithactualpeopleforachangeandnotstaylockedinmydormroom.Alittlefreedomwasdefinitelyworththepainofsittingthroughafewboringspeeches.

Ididn't stay tochatwithLissaafterschool likeIusuallydid.Dimitrihadstuck tohispromiseabout extra trainings, and Iwas trying to stick tomine. Inow had two additional hours of practicewith him, one before andone afterschool.ThemoreIwatchedhiminaction,themoreIunderstoodthebadass-godreputation.Heclearlyknewalot—hissixmolnijamarksprovedasmuch—andIburnedtohavehimteachmewhatheknew.

When I arrived at the gym, I noticed hewaswearing aT-shirt and looserunningpants,asopposedtohisusualjeans.Itwasagoodlookforhim.Reallygood.Stoplooking,Iimmediatelytoldmyself.

Hepositionedmesothatwestoodfacingeachotheronthematandcrossed

hisarms."What'sthefirstproblemyou'llrunintowhenfacingaStrigoi?”"They'reimmortal?”"Thinkofsomethingmorebasic.”More basic than that? I considered. "They could be bigger thanme.And

stronger.”MostStrigoi—unlessthey'dbeenhumanfirst—hadthesameheightastheir

Moroi cousins. Strigoi also had better strength, reflexes, and senses thandhampirs. That'swhy guardians trained so hard;we had a "learning curve" tocompensatefor.

Dimitrinodded."Thatmakesitdifficultbutnotimpossible.Youcanusuallyuseaperson'sextraheightandweightagainstthem.”

He turned and demonstrated several maneuvers, pointing out where tomoveandhowtostrikesomeone.Goingthroughthemotionswithhim,IgainedsomeinsightintowhyItooksucharegularbeatingingrouppractice.Iabsorbedhis techniquesquicklyandcouldn'twait to actuallyuse them.Near theendofourtimetogether,heletmetry.

"Goahead,"hesaid."Trytohitme.”Ididn'tneedtobetoldtwice.Lungingforward,Itriedtolandablowand

waspromptlyblockedandknockeddownontothemat.Painsurgedthroughmybody,butIrefusedtogiveintoit.I jumpedupagain,hopingtocatchhimoffguard.Ididn't.

Afterseveralmorefailedattempts,Istoodupandheldoutmyhandsinagestureoftruce."Okay,whatamIdoingwrong?”

"Nothing.”Iwasn'tasconvinced."IfIwasn'tdoinganythingwrong,I'dhaverendered

youunconsciousbynow.”"Unlikely.Yourmovesareallcorrect,butthisisthefirsttimeyou'vereally

tried.I'vedoneitforyears.”I shookmyhead and rolledmy eyes at his older-and-wisermanner.He'd

once toldmehewas twenty-four. "Whatever you say,Grandpa.Canwe try itagain?”

"We'reoutoftime.Don'tyouwanttogetready?”Ilookedatthedustyclockonthewallandperkedup.Almosttimeforthe

banquet. The thought made me giddy I felt like Cinderella, but without theclothes.

"Hell,yeah,Ido.”Hewalkedoffaheadofme.Studyinghimcarefully,IrealizedIcouldn'tlet

theopportunitygoby.Ileaptathisback,positioningmyselfexactlythewayhe'dtaughtme.Ihadtheelementofsurprise.Everythingwasperfect,andhewouldn't

evenseemecoming.BeforeIcouldmakecontact,hespunaroundataridiculouslyhighspeed.

Inonedeftmotion,hegrabbedmelikeIweighednothingandthrewmetotheground,pinningmethere.

Igroaned."Ididn'tdoanythingwrong!”Hiseyeslookedlevellyintomineasheheldmywrists,buthedidn'tlookas

seriousashehadduringthelesson.Heseemedtofindthisfunny."Thebattlecrysortofgaveyouaway.Trynottoyellnexttime.”

"WouldithavereallymadeadifferenceifI'dbeenquiet?”Hethoughtaboutit."No.Probablynot.”I sighed loudly, still in too much of a good mood to really let this

disappointment get me down. There were some advantages to having such akick-assmentor—onewho also happened to have a foot of height onme andoutweighedmeconsiderably.Andthatwasn'tevenconsideringhisstrength.Hewasn'tbulkybuthisbodyhadalotofhard,leanmuscle.IfIcouldeverbeathim,Icouldbeatanyone.

Allofasudden,itoccurredtomethathewasstillholdingmedown.Theskinonhisfingerswaswarmasheclutchedmywrists.Hisfacehoveredinchesfrommyown,andhislegsandtorsowereactuallypressingagainstmine.Someofhislongbrownhairhungaroundhisface,andheappearedtobenoticingmetoo,almostlikehehadthatnightinthelounge.AndohGod,didhesmellgood.Breathingbecamedifficultforme,andithadnothingtodowiththeworkoutormylungsbeingcrushed.

Iwouldhavegiven anything tobe able to readhismind right then.Eversince that night in the lounge, I'd noticed him watching me with this same,studiousexpression.Heneveractuallydid itduringthe trainings themselves—thosewerebusiness.Butbeforeandafter,hewouldsometimeslightenupjustalittle, and I'd see him look at me in a way that was almost admiring. Andsometimes,ifIwasreally,reallylucky,he'dsmileatme.Arealsmile,too—notthe dry one that accompanied the sarcasmwe tossed around so often. I didn'twanttoadmitittoanyone—nottoLissa,noteventomyself—butsomedays,Ilived for those smiles. They lit up his face. "Gorgeous" no longer adequatelydescribedhim.

Hoping to appear calm, I tried to think of something professional andguardian-related to say. Instead, I said, "So um…you got any othermoves toshowme?”

His lips twitched, and for amoment, I thought Iwasgoing toget oneofthosesmiles.Myheartleapt.Then,withvisibleeffort,hepushedthesmilebackandoncemorebecamemytough-lovementor.Heshiftedoffme,leanedbackon

hisheels,androse."Comeon.Weshouldgo.”I scrambled tomy own feet and followed him out of the gym.He didn't

lookbackashewalked,and Imentallykickedmyselfon thewayback tomyroom.

Iwascrushingonmymentor.Crushingonmyoldermentor.Ihadtobeoutofmymind.Hewas sevenyears older thanme.Old enough to bemy…well,okay,nothing.Butstillolderthanme.Sevenyearswasalot.He'dbeenlearningtowritewhenIwasborn.WhenI'dbeen learning towriteand throwbooksatmyteachers,he'dprobablybeenkissinggirls.Probablylotsofgirls,consideringhowhelooked.

Isodidnotneedthiscomplicationinmyliferightnow.

I found a passable sweater back inmy room and after a quick shower, Iheadedoffacrosscampustothereception.

Despitetheloomingstonewalls,fancystatues,andturretsontheoutsidesof the buildings, the Academy's insides were quite modern. We had Wi-Fi,fluorescentlights,andjustaboutanythingelsetechnologicalyoucouldimagine.The commons in particular looked prettymuch like the cafeterias I'd eaten inwhile in Portland andChicago,with simple rectangular tables, soothing taupewalls,andalittleroomofftothesidewhereourdubiouslypreparedmealswereserved. Someone had at least hung framed black-and-white photos along thewallsinanefforttodecorateit,butIdidn'treallyconsiderpicturesofvasesandleaflesstrees"art.”

Tonight,however,someonehadmanagedtotransformthenormallyboringcommonsintoabonafidediningroom.Vasesspillingoverwithcrimsonrosesanddelicatewhite lilies.Glowing candles.Tableclothsmadeof—wait for it—bloodredlinen.Theeffectwasgorgeous.ItwashardtobelievethiswasthesameplaceIusuallyatechickenpattysandwichesin.Itlookedfitfor,well,aqueen.

The tableshadbeenarranged in straight lines, creatinganaisledown themiddle of the room. We had assigned seating, and naturally, I couldn't sitanywherenearLissa.ShesatinthefrontwiththeotherMoroi;Iwasinthebackwith the novices. But she did catchmy eyewhen I entered and flashedme asmile. She'd borrowed a dress from Natalie—blue, silky, and strapless—thatlookedamazingwithherpalefeatures.Who'dknownNatalieownedanythingsogood?Itmademysweaterloseafewcoolpoints.

They always conducted these formal banquets in the same way. A headtablesatonadaisatthefrontoftheroom,wherewecouldalloohandahhandwatchQueenTatianaandother royalseatdinner.Guardians lined thewalls,as

stiff and formal as statues. Dimitri stood among them, and a weird feelingtwistedmystomachasIrecalledwhathadhappenedinthegym.Hiseyesstaredstraightahead,asiffocusingonnothingandeverythingintheroomatonce.

When the timecamefor the royals' entrance,weall stoodup respectfullyandwatched as theywalked down the aisle. I recognized a few,mostly thosewho had children attending the Academy. Victor Dashkov was among them,walking slowly andwith a cane.While I was happy to see him, I cringed towatcheachagonizingstephetooktowardthefrontoftheroom.

Oncethatgrouphadpassed,foursolemnguardianswithred-and-black-pin-stripedjacketsenteredthecommons.Everyonebuttheguardiansalongthewallssanktoourkneesinasillyshowofloyalty.

Whatalotofceremonyandposturing,Ithoughtwearily.Moroimonarchswerechosenbythepreviousmonarchfromwithintheroyalfamilies.Thekingorqueencouldn'tchooseoneofhisorherowndirectdescendents,andacouncilfromthenobleandroyal familiescoulddispute thechoicewithenoughcause.Thatalmostneverhappened,though.

QueenTatianafollowedherguards,wearingaredsilkdressandmatchingjacket.ShewasinherearlysixtiesandhaddarkgrayhairbobbedtoherchinandcrownedwithaMissAmerica-typetiara.Shemovedintotheroomslowly,likeshewastakingastroll,fourmoreguardiansatherback.

Shemovedthroughthenovices'sectionfairlyquickly,thoughshedidnodand smile here and there.Dhampirsmight just be the half-human, illegitimatechildren of theMoroi, but we trained and dedicated our lives to serving andprotectingthem.Thelikelihoodwasstrongthatmanyofusgatheredherewoulddieyoung,andthequeenhadtoshowherrespectforthat.

WhenshegottotheMoroisection,shepausedlongerandactuallyspoketoa few students. It was a big deal to be acknowledged, mostly a sign thatsomeone'sparentshadgotteningoodwithher.Naturally,theroyalsgotthemostattention.Shedidn'treallysaymuchtothemthatwasallthatinteresting,mostlyjustalotoffancywords.

"VasilisaDragomir.”My head shot up. Alarm coursed through the bond at the sound of her

name.Breakingprotocol,Ipushedoutofmypositionandwiggledovertogetabetter view, knowing no one would notice me when the queen herself hadpersonallysingledoutthelastoftheDragomirs.EveryonewaseagertoseewhatthemonarchhadtosaytoLissatherunawayprincess.

"Weheardyouhadreturned.WearegladtohavetheDragomirsback,eventhough only one remains.We deeply regret the loss of your parents and yourbrother;theywereamongthefinestoftheMoroi,theirdeathsatruetragedy.”

I'dneverreallyunderstoodtheroyal"we"thing,butotherwise,everythingsoundedokay.

"Youhaveaninterestingname,"shecontinued."ManyheroinesinRussianfairy tales are namedVasilisa.Vasilisa theBrave,Vasilisa theBeautiful.Theyare different youngwomen, all having the same name and the same excellentqualities: strength, intelligence, discipline, and virtue. All accomplish greatthings,triumphingovertheiradversaries.

"Likewise,theDragomirnamecommandsitsownrespect.Dragomirkingsand queens have ruled wisely and justly in our history. They have used theirpowers for miraculous ends. They have slain Strigoi, fighting right alongsidetheirguardians.Theyareroyalforareason.”

Shewaitedamoment,lettingtheweightofherwordssinkin.Icouldfeelthemoodchangingintheroom,aswellasthesurpriseandshypleasurecreepingoutfromLissa.Thiswouldshakethesocialbalance.WecouldprobablyexpectafewwannabestryingtogetingoodwithLissatomorrow.

"Yes,"Tatianacontinued,"youaredoublynamedwithpower.Yournamesrepresent the finest qualities people have to offer andhearkenback in time todeeds of greatness and valor." She paused a moment. "But, as you havedemonstrated,namesdonotmake a person.Nor do they have any bearing onhowthatpersonturnsout.”

Andwith thatverbal slap in the face, she turnedawayandcontinuedherprocession.

A collective shock filled the room. I briefly contemplated and thendismissedanyattemptsatjumpingintotheaisleandtacklingthequeen.Halfadozen guardianswould haveme down on the floor before I'd even taken fivesteps.SoIsat impatiently throughdinner,all thewhilefeelingLissa'sabsolutemortification.

When the post-dinner reception followed, Lissa made a beeline for thedoorsleadingouttothecourtyard.Ifollowed,butgotdelayedhavingtoweavearoundandavoidthemingling,socializingpeople.

She'd wandered outside to an adjacent courtyard, one that matched theAcademy's grand external style. A roof of carved, twisting wood covered thegarden,with little holeshere and there to let in some light, but not enough tocausedamagetoMoroi.Trees,leavesnowgoneforthewinter,linedtheareaandguardedpathsleadingouttoothergardens,courtyards,andthemainquadrangle.Apond,alsoemptiedforthewinter,layinacorner,andstandingoveritwasanimposingstatueofSt.Vladimirhimself.Carvedofgrayrock,heworelongrobes

andhadabeardandmustache.Roundingacorner,IstoppedwhenIsawNataliehadbeatenmetoLissa.I

consideredinterruptingbutsteppedbackbeforetheycouldseeme.Spyingmightbebad,butIwassuddenlyverycurioustohearwhatNataliehadtosaytoLissa.

"Sheshouldn'thavesaidthat,"Nataliesaid.Sheworeayellowdresssimilarin cut to Lissa's, but somehow lacked the grace and poise tomake it look asgood. Yellowwas also a terrible color on her. It clashedwith her black hair,whichshe'dputupintoanoff-centerbun."Itwasn'tright,"shewenton."Don'tletitbotheryou.”

"Kind of late for that." Lissa's eyes were locked firmly on the stonewalkwaybelow.

"Shewaswrong.”"She'sright,"Lissaexclaimed."Myparents…andAndre…theywouldhave

hatedmeforwhatIdid.”"No,theywouldn'thave."Nataliespokeinagentlevoice."Itwasstupidtorunaway.Irresponsible.”"Sowhat?Youmadeamistake.Imakemistakesallthetime.Theotherday,

I was doing this assignment in science, and it was for chapter ten, and I'dactuallyreadchapterelev—"Nataliestoppedherselfand,inaremarkableshowofrestraint,gotherselfbackon track."Peoplechange.We'realwayschanging,right?Youaren'tthesameasyouwerethen.I'mnotthesameasIwasthen.”

Actually,Natalieseemedexactlythesametome,butthatdidn'tbothermesomuchanymore.She'dgrownonme.

"Besides,"sheadded,"wasrunningawayreallyamistake?Youmusthavedoneitforareason.Youmusthavegottensomethingoutofit,right?Therewasalotofbadstuffgoingonwithyou,wasn't there?Withyourparentsandyourbrother.Imean,maybeitwastherightthingtodo.”

Lissahidasmile.BothofuswereprettysureNataliewastryingtofindoutwhywe had left—just like everyone else in the school. She sort of sucked atbeingsneaky.

"Idon'tknowifitwas,no,"Lissaanswered."Iwasweak.Andrewouldn'thaverunaway.Hewassogood.Goodateverything.Goodatgettingalongwithpeopleandallthatroyalcrap.”

"You'regoodatthattoo.”"Iguess.ButIdon'tlikeit.Imean,Ilikepeople…butmostofwhattheydo

issofake.That'swhatIdon'tlike.”"Thendon'tfeelbadaboutnotgettinginvolved,"Nataliesaid.“Idon'thang

outwith all those people either, and look atme. I'm just fine.Daddy says hedoesn'tcareifIhangoutwiththeroyalsornot.Hejustwantsmetobehappy.”

"And that," I said, finally makingmy appearance, "is why he should berulinginsteadofthatbitchofaqueen.Hegotrobbed.”

Natalie nearly jumped ten feet. I felt pretty confident her vocabulary ofswearwordsmostlyconsistedof"golly"and"darn.”

"Iwonderedwhereyouwere,"saidLissa.Natalie looked back and forth between us, suddenly seeming a little

embarrassed to be right between the best-friends dream team. She shifteduncomfortablyandtuckedsomemessyhairbehindherear."Well…IshouldgofindDaddy.I'llseeyoubackintheroom.”

"Seeyou,"saidLissa."Andthanks.”Nataliehurriedoff."Doesshereallycallhim'Daddy'?”Lissacutmealook."Leaveheralone.She'snice.”"Sheis,actually.Iheardwhatshesaid,andasmuchasIhate toadmit it,

therewasnothingthereIcouldreallymakefunof.Itwasalltrue."Ipaused."I'llkillher,youknow.Thequeen,notNatalie.Screwtheguardians. I'lldo it.Shecan'tgetawaywiththat.”

"God,Rose!Don'tsaythat.They'llarrestyoufortreason.Justletitgo.”"Letitgo?Afterwhatshesaidtoyou?Infrontofeveryone?”She didn't answer or even look atme. Instead, she toyed absentmindedly

withthebranchesofascragglybushthathadgonedormantforthewinter.TherewasavulnerablelookaboutherthatIrecognized—andfeared.

"Hey." I loweredmyvoice. "Don't look like that. Shedoesn't knowwhatshe's talking about, okay?Don't let this get you down.Don't do anything youshouldn't.”

She glanced back up at me. "It's going to happen again, isn't it?" shewhispered.Herhand,stillclutchingthetree,begantotremble.

"Not if you don't let it." I tried to look at her wrists without being tooobvious."Youhaven't?…”

"No."She shookher head andblinkedback tears. "I haven'twanted to. Iwasupsetafterthefox,butit'sbeenokay.Ilikethecoastingthing.Imissseeingyou,buteverything'sbeenallright.Ilike…"Shepaused.

Icouldhearthewordforminginhermind."Christian.”"Iwishyoucouldn'tdothat.Orwouldn't.”"Sorry. Do I need to give you the Christian's-a-psychopathic-loser talk

again?”"IthinkI'vegotitmemorizedafterthelasttentimes,"shemuttered.IstartedtolaunchintonumberelevenwhenIheardthesoundoflaughter

andtheclatterofhighheelsonstone.MiawalkedtowarduswithafewfriendsintowbutnoAaron.Immediatelymydefensessnappedon.

Internally,Lissawas still shakenover thequeen's comments.Sorrowandhumiliationwere swirling insideofher.She felt embarrassedoverwhatothersmustthinkofhernowandkeptthinkingabouthowherfamilywouldhavehatedher for running away. I didn't believe that, but it felt real to her, andher darkemotionschurnedandchurned.Shewasnotokay, nomatter how casual she'djusttriedtoact,andIwasworriedshemightdosomethingreckless.Miawasthelastpersonsheneededtoseerightnow.

"Whatdoyouwant?"Idemanded.MiasmiledhaughtilyatLissaandignoredme,takingafewstepsforward.

"Justwantedtoknowwhatit'sliketobesoimportantandsoroyal.Youmustbeso excited that the queen talked to you."Giggles surfaced from the gatheringgroup.

"You're standing too close." I stepped between them, andMia flinched alittle,possiblystillworriedImightbreakherarm."Andheyat least thequeenknewhername,whichismorethanIcansayforyouandyourwannabe-royalact.Oryourparents.”

Icouldseethepainthatcausedher.Man,shewantedtoberoyalsobadly."At least I seemyparents," she retorted. "At least I knowwho they both are.Godonlyknowswhoyour father is.Andyourmom'soneof themost famousguardiansaround,but shecouldn't care lessaboutyoueither.Everyoneknowsshenevervisits.Probablywasgladwhenyouweregone.Ifsheevennoticed.”

Thathurt.Iclenchedmyteeth."Yeah,well,atleastshe'sfamous.Shereallydoesadviseroyalsandnobles.Shedoesn'tcleanupafterthem.”

I heard one of her friends snicker behind her.Mia opened hermouth, nodoubttounleashoneofthemanyretortsshe'dhadtoaccumulatesincethestorystartedgoingaround,whenthelightbulbsuddenlywentoffinherhead.

"Itwasyou,"shesaid,eyeswide."SomeonetoldmeJesse'dstartedit,buthecouldn'thaveknownanythingaboutme.Hegotitfromyou.Whenyousleptwithhim.”

Nowshewasreallystartingtopissmeoff."Ididn'tsleepwithhim.”MiapointedatLissaandglaredbackatme."Sothat'sit,huh?Youdoher

dirtyworkbecauseshe'stoopathetictodoitherself.Youaren'talwaysgoingtobeabletoprotecther,"shewarned."Youaren'tsafeeither.”

Emptythreats.Ileanedforward,makingmyvoiceasmenacingaspossible.Inmycurrentmood,itwasn'tdifficult."Yeah?Tryandtouchmenowandfindout.”

Ihopedshewould.Iwantedherto.Wedidn'tneedhermessed-upvendetta

inourlivesjustnow.Shewasadistraction—oneIverymuchwantedtopunchrightnow.

Lookingpasther, I sawDimitrimoveout into thegarden,eyessearchingforsomething—orsomeone.Ihadaprettygoodideawhoitwas.Whenhesawme,hestrodeforward,shiftinghisattentionwhenhenoticedthecrowdgatheredaroundus.Guardians can smell a fight amile away.Of course, a six-year-oldcouldhavesmelledthisfight.

Dimitristoodbesidemeandcrossedhisarms."Everythingallright?”"Sure thing, Guardian Belikov." I smiled as I said it, but I was furious.

Raging, even. ThiswholeMia confrontation had onlymadeLissa feelworse."Wewerejustswappingfamilystories.EverheardMia's?It'sfascinating.”

"Comeon,"saidMiatoherfollowers.Sheledthemoff,butnotbeforeshe'dgivenmeonelast,chillinglook.Ididn'tneedtoreadhermindtoknowwhatitsaid.Thiswasn'tover.Shewasgoingtotrytogetoneorbothofusback.Fine.Bringiton,Mia.

"I'msupposedtotakeyoubacktoyourdorm,"Dimitritoldmedrily."Youweren'tabouttojuststartafight,wereyou?”

"Ofcoursenot,"Isaid,myeyesstillstaringattheemptydoorwayMiahaddisappearedthrough."Idon'tstartfightswherepeoplecanseethem.”

"Rose,"groanedLissa."Let'sgo.Goodnight,Princess.”Heturned,butIdidn'tmove."Yougoingtobeokay,Liss?”Shenodded."I'mfine.”Itwassuchalie,Icouldn'tbelieveshehadthenervetotrytoputitpastme.

I didn't need the bond to see tears shining in her eyes.We should never havecomebacktothisplace,Irealizedbleakly.

"Liss…”Shegavemea small, sad smileandnodded inDimitri'sdirection. "I told

you,I'mfine.You'vegottogo.”Reluctantly, I followed him. He ledme out toward the other side of the

garden."Wemayneedtoaddanextratrainingonself-control,"henoted."Ihaveplentyofselfcontr—hey!”IstoppedtalkingasIsawChristianslippastus,movingdownthepathwe'd

justcomefrom.Ihadn'tseenhimatthereception,butifKirovahadreleasedmetocometonight,Isupposeshewouldhavedonethesameforhim.

"YougoingtoseeLissa?"Idemanded,shiftingmyMiaragetohim.He stuffed his hands into his pockets and gaveme that look of bad-boy

indifference."WhatifIam?”"Rose,thisisn'tthetime,"saidDimitri.

Butitwassothetime.LissahadignoredmywarningsaboutChristianforweeks. Itwas time togo to the sourceand stop their ridiculous flirtationonceandforall.

"Whydon'tyoujustleaveheralone?Areyousomessedupanddesperatefor attention that you can't tellwhen someone doesn't like you?"He scowled."You'resomecrazystalker,andsheknowsit.She'stoldmeallaboutyourweirdobsession—how you're always hanging out in the attic together, how you setRalfon fire to impressher.She thinksyou'rea freak,butshe's toonice tosayanything.”

Hisfacehadpaled,andsomethingdarkchurnedinhiseyes."Butyouaren'ttoonice?”

"No.NotwhenIfeelsorryforsomeone.”"Enough,"saidDimitri,steeringmeaway."Thanks for 'helping,' then," snapped Christian, his voice dripping with

animosity."Noproblem,"Icalledbackovermyshoulder.Whenwe'dgonealittleways,IstoleaglancebehindmeandsawChristian

standing just outside the garden.He'd stoppedwalking and now stood staringdownthepaththatledtoLissainthecourtyard.Shadowscoveredhisfaceashethought, and then, after a few moments, he turned around and headed backtowardtheMoroidorms.

Twelve

SLEEPCAMERELUCTANTLYTHATNIGHTandItossedandturnedforalongtimebeforefinallygoingunder.

Anhourorsolater,Isatupinbed,tryingtorelaxandsortouttheemotionscoming tome.Lissa. Scared and upset.Unstable.The night's events suddenlycame rushing back tome as Iwent throughwhat could be bothering her.Thequeenhumiliatingher.Mia.MaybeevenChristian—hecouldhavefoundherforallIknew.

Yet…noneofthosewastheproblemrightnow.Buriedwithinher,therewassomethingelse.Somethingterriblywrong.

I climbedoutofbed,dressedhastily, andconsideredmyoptions. I hadathird-floor room now—way too high to climb down from, particularly since IhadnoMs.Karptopatchmeupthistime.Iwouldneverbeabletosneakoutofthemainhall.Thatonlyleftgoingthroughthe"appropriate"channels.

"Wheredoyouthinkyou'regoing?”Oneofthematronswhosupervisedmyhalllookedupfromherchair.She

satstationedat theendof thehall,near thestairsgoingdown.Duringtheday,thatstairwellhadloosesupervision.Atnight,wemightaswellhavebeeninjail.

Icrossedmyarms."IneedtoseeDim—GuardianBelikov.”"It'slate.”"It'sanemergency.”Shelookedmeupanddown."Youseemokaytome.”"You'regoingtobeinsomuchtroubletomorrowwheneveryonefindsout

youstoppedmefromreportingwhatIknow.”"Tellme.”"It'sprivateguardianstuff.”IgaveherashardastareasIcouldmanage.Itmusthaveworked,because

shefinallystoodupandpulledoutacellphone.Shecalledsomeone—Dimitri,Ihoped—butmurmuredtoolowformetohear.Wewaitedseveralminutes,andthen thedoor leading to the stairsopened.Dimitri appeared, fullydressedandalert,thoughIfeltprettysurewe'dpulledhimoutofbed.

Hetookonelookatme."Lissa.”Inodded.Withoutanotherword,heturnedaroundandstartedbackdownthestairs.I

followed.We walked across the quad in silence, toward the imposingMoroidorm.Itwas"night"forthevampires,whichmeantitwasdaytimefortherestoftheworld.Mid-afternoonsunshonewithacold,goldenlightonus.ThehumangenesinmewelcomeditandalwayssortofregrettedhowMoroilightsensitivity

forcedustoliveindarknessmostofthetime.Lissa's hall matron gaped when we appeared, but Dimitri was too

intimidating tooppose."She's in thebathroom,”I told them.Whenthematronstartedtofollowmeinside,Iwouldn'tlether."She'stooupset.Letmetalktoheralonefirst.”

Dimitriconsidered."Yes.Givethemaminute.”Ipushedthedooropen."Liss?”Asoftsound, likeasob,camefromwithin.Iwalkeddownfivestallsand

foundtheonlyoneclosed.Iknockedsoftly."Letmein,"Isaid,hopingIsoundedcalmandstrong.I heard a sniffle, and a few moments later, the door unlatched. I wasn't

preparedforwhatIsaw.Lissastoodbeforeme……coveredinblood.Horrified, Isquelchedascreamandalmostcalledforhelp.Lookingmore

closely, I saw that a lot of the bloodwasn't actually coming from her. It wassmeared on her, like it had been on her hands and she'd rubbed her face. Shesanktothefloor,andIfollowed,kneelingbeforeher.

"Areyouokay?"Iwhispered."Whathappened?”Sheonlyshookherhead,butIsawherfacecrumpleasmoretearsspilled

fromhereyes.Itookherhands."Comeon.Let'sgetyoucleaned—”Istopped.Shewasbleedingafter all.Perfect linescrossedherwrists,not

nearanycrucialveins,butenoughtoleavewet,redtracksacrossherskin.Shehadn'thitherveinswhenshedid this;deathhadn'tbeenhergoal.Shemetmyeyes.

"I'm sorry…I didn'tmean…Please don't let them know . . ." she sobbed."When I saw it, I freaked out." She nodded toward her wrists. "This justhappenedbeforeIcouldstop.Iwasupset….”

"It'sokay,"Isaidautomatically,wonderingwhat"it"was."Comeon.”Iheardaknockonthedoor."Rose?”"Justasec,"Icalledback.Itookhertothesinkandrinsedthebloodoffherwrists.Grabbingthefirst-

aid kit, I hastily put some Band-Aids on the cuts. The bleeding had alreadyslowed.

"We'recomingin,"thematroncalled.I jerkedoffmyhoodiesweatshirtandquicklyhandedit toLissa.Shehad

justpulleditonwhenDimitriandthematronentered.Heracedtooursidesinaninstant,andIrealizedthatinhidingLissa'swrists,I'dforgottenthebloodonher

face."It's not mine," she said quickly, seeing his expression. "It…it’s the

rabbit….”Dimitriassessedher,andIhopedhewouldn'tlookatherwrists.Whenhe

seemed satisfied she had no gaping wounds, he asked, "What rabbit?" I waswonderingthesamething.

With shaking hands, she pointed at the trash can. "I cleaned it up. SoNataliewouldn'tsee.”

Dimitri and I bothwalked over and peered into the can. I pulledmyselfaway immediately, swallowing back my stomach's need to throw up. I don'tknow howLissa knew it was a rabbit. All I could seewas blood. Blood andblood-soaked paper towels. Globs of gore I couldn't identify. The smell washorrible.

DimitrishiftedclosertoLissa,bendingdownuntil theywereateyelevel."Tellmewhathappened."Hehandedherseveraltissues.

"Icamebackaboutanhourago.Anditwasthere.Rightthereinthemiddleofthefloor.Tornapart.Itwaslikeithad…exploded."Shesniffed."Ididn'twantNatalie to find it, didn'twant to scare her…so I—I cleaned it up. Then I justcouldn't…Icouldn'tgoback…."Shebegantocry,andhershouldersshook.

Icouldfigureout therest, thepartshedidn't tellDimitri.She'dfoundtherabbit,cleanedup,andfreakedout.Thenshe'dcutherself,butitwastheweirdwayshecopedwiththingsthatupsether.

"No one should be able to get into those rooms!" exclaimed thematron."Howisthishappening?”

"Doyouknowwhodidit?"Dimitri'svoicewasgentle.Lissa reached intoher pajamapocket andpulledout a crumpledpieceof

paper.Ithadsomuchbloodsoakedintoit,Icouldbarelyreaditashehelditandsmootheditout.

Iknowwhatyouare.Youwon'tsurvivebeinghere.I'llmakesureofit.Leavenow.It'stheonlywayyoumightlivethroughthis.

Thematron'sshocktransformedintosomethingmoredetermined,andsheheadedfor thedoor."I'mgettingEllen."It tookmeasecondtoremember thatwasKirova'sfirstname.

"Tell herwe'll be at the clinic," saidDimitri.When she left, he turned toLissa."Youshouldliedown.”

Whenshedidn'tmove,Ilinkedmyarmthroughhers."Comeon,Liss.Let'sgetyououtofhere.”

Slowly, she put one foot in front of the other and let us lead her to theAcademy'smedicalclinic.Itwasnormallystaffedbyacoupleofdoctors,butat

this timeofnight,onlyanursestayedonduty.Sheofferedtowakeoneof thedoctors,butDimitrideclined."Shejustneedstorest.”

LissahadnosoonerstretchedoutonanarrowbedthanKirovaandafewothersshowedupandstartedquestioningher.

Ithrustmyselfinfrontofthem,blockingher."Leaveheralone!Can'tyouseeshedoesn'twanttotalkaboutit?Lethergetsomesleepfirst!”

"MissHathaway,"declaredKirova,"you'reoutoflineasusual.Idon'tevenknowwhatyou'redoinghere.”

Dimitriaskedifhecouldspeakwithherprivatelyandledherintothehall.Iheard angry whispers from her, calm and firm ones from him. When theyreturned, she said stiffly, "Youmay staywithher for a littlewhile.We'll havejanitors do further cleaning and investigation in the bathroom and your room,MissDragomir,andthendiscussthesituationindetailinthemorning.”

"Don'twakeNatalie,"whisperedLissa."Idon'twanttoscareher.Icleanedupeverythingintheroomanyway.”

Kirovalookeddoubtful.ThegroupretreatedbutnotbeforethenurseaskedifLissawantedanythingtoeatordrink.Shedeclined.Oncewewerealone,Ilaydownbesideherandputmyarmaroundher.

"Iwon't let themfindout," I toldher,sensingherworryaboutherwrists."But Iwishyou'd toldmebefore I left the reception.You'd saidyou'd alwayscometomefirst.”

"I wasn't going to do it then," she said, her eyes staring blankly off. "Iswear,Iwasn'tgoingto.Imean,Iwasupset…butIthought…IthoughtIcouldhandle it. Iwas tryingsohard…really,Rose.Iwas.But thenIgotbacktomyroom,andIsawit,andI…justlostit.Itwaslikethelaststraw,youknow?AndIknewIhadtocleanitup.Hadtocleanitupbeforetheysaw,beforetheyfoundout,buttherewassomuchblood…andafterward,afteritwasdone,itwastoomuch,andIfeltlikeIwasgoingto…Idon'tknow…explode,anditwasjusttoomuch,Ihadtoletitout,youknow?Ihadto—”

Iinterruptedherhysteria."It'sokay,Iunderstand.”Thatwasalie.Ididn'tgethercuttingatall.She'ddoneitsporadically,ever

sincetheaccident,anditscaredmeeachtime.She'dtrytoexplainittome,howshedidn'twanttodie—shejustneededtogetitoutsomehow.Shefeltsomuchemotionally,shewouldsaythataphysicaloutlet—physicalpain—wastheonlywaytomaketheinternalpaingoaway.Itwastheonlywayshecouldcontrolit.

"Whyisthishappening?"shecriedintoherpillow."WhyamIafreak?”"Youaren'tafreak.”"Nooneelsehasthishappentothem.NooneelsedoesmagiclikeIcan.”"Did you try to do magic?" No answer. "Liss? Did you try to heal the

rabbit?”"I reached out, just to see if I couldmaybe fix it, but therewas just too

muchblood…Icouldn't.”Themoresheusesit,theworseit'llget.Stopher,Rose.Lissawasright.Moroimagiccouldconjurefireandwater,moverocksand

otherpiecesofearth.Butnoonecouldhealorbringanimalsbackfromthedead.NooneexceptMs.Karp.

Stopherbeforetheynotice,beforetheynoticeandtakeherawaytoo.Getheroutofhere.

Ihatedcarryingthissecret,mostlybecauseIdidn'tknowwhattodoaboutit. I didn't like feelingpowerless. I needed toprotecther from this—and fromherself.Andyet,atthesametime,Ineededtoprotectherfromthem,too.

"Weshouldgo,"Isaidabruptly."We'regoingtoleave.”"Rose—”"It'shappeningagain.Andit'sworse.Worsethanlasttime.”"You'reafraidofthenote.”"I'mnotafraidofanynote.Butthisplaceisn'tsafe.”IsuddenlylongedforPortlandagain.Itmightbedirtierandmorecrowded

thantheruggedMontanalandscape,butatleastyouknewwhattoexpect—notlikehere.HereattheAcademy,pastandpresentwarredwitheachother.Itmighthaveitsbeautifuloldwallsandgardens,butinside,modernthingswerecreepingin.Peopledidn'tknowhowtohandlethat.ItwasjustliketheMoroithemselves.Theirarchaicroyalfamiliesstillheldthepoweronthesurface,butpeopleweregrowing discontent. Dhampirs who wanted more to their lives. Moroi likeChristian who wanted to fight the Strigoi. The royals still clung to theirtraditions, still touted their power over everyone else, just as the Academy'selaborateirongatesputonashowoftraditionandinvincibility.

And, oh, the lies and secrets. They ran through the halls and hid in thecorners.SomeoneherehatedLissa,someonewhowasprobablysmilingrighttoherfaceandpretendingtobeherfriend.Icouldn'tletthemdestroyher.

"Youneedtogetsomesleep,"Itoldher."Ican'tsleep.”"Yes,youcan.I'mrighthere.Youwon'tbealone.”Anxietyandfearandother troubledemotionscoursed throughher.But in

the end, her body's needs won out. After a while, I saw her eyes close. Herbreathingbecameeven,andthebondgrewquiet.

Iwatchedhersleep,tookeyedupwithadrenalinetoallowmyselfanyrest.IthinkmaybeanhourhadpassedwhenthenursereturnedandtoldmeIhadtoleave.

"Ican'tgo,"Isaid."Ipromisedhershewouldn'tbealone.”Thenursewastall,evenforaMoroi,withkindbrowneyes."Shewon'tbe.

I'llstaywithher.”Iregardedherskeptically."Ipromise."

Backinmyroom,Ihadmyowncrash.Thefearandexcitementhadwornmeouttoo,andforaninstant,IwishedIcouldhaveanormallifeandanormalbestfriend.Immediately,Icastthatthoughtout.Noonewasnormal,notreally.And I'd never have a better friend than Lissa…but man, it was so hardsometimes.

I sleptheavilyuntilmorning. Iwent tomy first class tentatively,nervousthat word about last night had gotten around. As it turned out, people weretalkingaboutlastnight,buttheirattentionwasstillfocusedonthequeenandthereception.Theyknewnothingabouttherabbit.Ashardasitwastobelieve,I'dnearlyforgottenaboutthatotherstuff.Still,itsuddenlyseemedlikeasmallthingcomparedtosomeonecausingabloodyexplosioninLissa'sroom.

Yet,asthedaywenton,Inoticedsomethingweird.PeoplestoppedlookingatLissasomuch.Thestartedlookingatme.Whatever.Ignoringthem,IhuntedaroundandfoundLissafinishingupwithafeeder.ThatfunnyfeelingIalwaysgot came over me as I watched her mouth work against the feeder's neck,drinkinghisblood.A trickleof it randownhis throat, standingoutagainsthispale skin. Feeders, though human, were nearly as pale asMoroi from all thebloodloss.Hedidn'tseemtonotice;hewaslonggoneonthehighofthebite.Drowninginjealousy,IdecidedIneededtherapy.

"Youokay?"Iaskedherlater,onourwaytoclass.Sheworelongsleeves,purposefullyobscuringherwrists.

"Yeah…I still can't stop thinking about that rabbit…It was so horrible. Ikeepseeingitinmyhead.AndthenwhatIdid."Shesqueezedhereyesshut,justforamoment,andthenopenedthemagain."Peoplearetalkingaboutus.”

"Iknow.Ignorethem.”"I hate it," she said angrily. A surge of darkness shot up into her and

throughthebond.Itmademecringe.Mybestfriendwaslightheartedandkind.Shedidn'thavefeelingslikethat."Ihateallthegossip.It'ssostupid.Howcantheyallbesoshallow?”

"Ignorethem,"Irepeatedsoothingly."Youweresmartnottohangoutwiththemanymore.”

Ignoring them grew harder and harder, though. The whispers and looks

increased.Inanimalbehavior,itbecamesobad,Icouldn'tevenconcentrateonmynow-favoritesubject.Ms.Meissnerhadstarted talkingaboutevolutionandsurvival of the fittest and how animals sought mates with good genes. Itfascinatedme, but even shehad a hard time stayingon task, since shehad tokeepyellingatpeopletoquietdownandpayattention.

"Something'sgoingon,"I toldLissabetweenclasses."Idon'tknowwhat,butthey'realloversomethingnew.”

"Somethingelse?Otherthanthequeenhatingme?Whatmorecouldtherebe?”

"WishIknew.”Things finally came to a head in our last class of the day, Slavic art. It

started when a guy I barely knew made a very explicit and nearly obscenesuggestiontomewhileweallworkedonindividualprojects. I repliedinkind,lettinghimknowexactlywhathecoulddowithhisrequest.

Heonlylaughed."Comeon,Rose.Ibleedforyou.”Loudgigglesensued,andMiacutusatauntinglook."Wait,it'sRosewho

doesthebleeding,right?”Morelaughter.Understandingslappedmeintheface.IjerkedLissaaway.

"Theyknow.”"Knowwhat?”"About us. About how you…you know, how I fed you while we were

gone.”Shegaped."How?”"Howdoyouthink?Your'friend'Christian.”"No,"shesaidadamantly."Hewouldn'thave.”"Whoelseknew?”FaithinChristianflashedinhereyesandinourbond.Butshedidn'tknow

whatIknew.Shedidn'tknowhowI'dbitchedhimoutlastnight,howI'dmadehimthinkshehatedhim.Theguywasunstable.Spreadingourbiggestsecret—well,oneofthem—wouldbeanadequaterevenge.Maybehe'dkilledtherabbit,too.Afterall,ithaddiedonlyacouplehoursafterI'dtoldhimoff.

Notwaitingaroundtohearherprotests,IstalkedofftotheothersideoftheroomwhereChristianwasworkingbyhimself,asusual.Lissa followed inmywake.Notcaringifpeoplesawus,Ileanedacrossthetabletowardhim,puttingmyfaceinchesfromhis.

"I'mgoingtokillyou.”HiseyesdartedtoLissa,thefaintestglimmeroflonginginthem,andthena

scowlspreadoverhisface."Why?Isitlikeguardianextracredit?”"Stopwith theattitude," Iwarned,pitchingmyvoice low."You told.You

toldhowLissahadtofeedoffme.”"Tellher,"saidLissadesperately."Tellhershe'swrong.”Christiandraggedhiseyesfrommetoher,andastheyregardedeachother,

Ifeltsuchapowerfulwaveofattraction,itwasawonderitdidn'tknockmeover.Herheartwasinhereyes.Itwasobvioustomehefeltthesamewayabouther,butshecouldn'tseeit,particularlysincehewasstillglaringather.

"Youcanstopit,youknow,"hesaid."Youdon'thavetopretendanymore.”Lissa'sgiddyattractionvanished,replacedbyhurtandshockoverhistone.

"I…what?Pretendwhat?…”"Youknowwhat.Juststop.Stopwiththeact.”Lissastaredathim,hereyeswideandwounded.ShehadnoclueI'dgone

offonhimlastnight.Shehadnocluethathebelievedshehatedhim."Getoverfeelingsorryforyourself,andtelluswhat'sgoingon,"Isnapped

athim."Didyouordidn'tyoutellthem?”Hefixedmewithadefiantlook."No.Ididn't.”"Idon'tbelieveyou.”"Ido,"saidLissa."Iknowit'simpossibletobelieveafreaklikemecouldkeephismouthshut

—especiallysinceneitherofyoucan—butIhavebetterthingstodothanspreadstupidrumors.Youwantsomeonetoblame?Blameyourgoldenboyoverthere.”

IfollowedhisgazetowhereJessewaslaughingaboutsomethingwiththatidiotRalf.

"Jessedoesn'tknow,"saidLissadefiantly.Christian'seyesweregluedtome."Hedoes,though.Doesn'the,Rose?He

knows.”Mystomachsankoutofme.Yes.Jessedidknow.He'dfigured itout that

nightinthelounge."Ididn'tthink…Ididn'tthinkhe'dtell.HewastooafraidofDimitri.”

"Youtoldhim?"exclaimedLissa."No,heguessed."Iwasstartingtofeelsick."Heapparentlydidmorethanguess,"mutteredChristian.Iturnedonhim."What'sthatsupposedtomean?”"Oh.Youdon'tknow.”"IsweartoGod,Christian,I'mgoingtobreakyourneckafterclass.”"Man, you really are unstable." He said it almost happily, but his next

wordsweremoreserious.Hestillwore thatsneer,stillglowedwithanger,butwhen he spoke, I could hear the faintest uneasiness in his voice. "He sort ofelaboratedonwhatwasinyournote.Gotintoalittlemoredetail.”

"Oh,Igetit.Hesaidwehadsex."Ididn'tneedtomincewords.Christian

nodded. So. Jessewas trying to boost his own reputation.Okay. That I coulddeal with. Not like my reputation was that stellar to begin with. EveryonealreadybelievedIhadsexallthetime.

"Anduh,Ralftoo.Thatyouandhe—”Ralf?Noamountofalcoholoranyillegalsubstancewouldmakemetouch

him."I—what?ThatIhadsexwithRalftoo?”Christiannodded."Thatasshole!I'mgoingto—”"There'smore.”"How?DidIsleepwiththebasketballteam?”"He said—they both said—you let them…well, you let them drink your

blood.”Thatstoppedevenme.Drinkingbloodduringsex.Thedirtiestofthedirty.

Sleazy.Beyondbeingeasyoraslut.AgazilliontimesworsethanLissadrinkingfrommeforsurvival.Blood-whoreterritory.

"That'scrazy!"Lissacried."Rosewouldnever—Rose?”ButIwasn't listeninganymore.Iwasinmyownworld,aworldthattook

meacrosstheclassroomtowhereJesseandRalfsat.Theybothlookedup,faceshalfsmugandhalf…nervous,ifIhadtoguess.Notunexpected,sincetheywerebothlyingthroughtheirteeth.

Theentireclasscametoastandstill.Apparentlythey'dbeenexpectingsometypeofshowdown.Myunstablereputationinaction.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I asked in a low, dangerousvoice.

Jesse'snervouslookturnedtooneofterror.Hemighthavebeentallerthanme,butwebothknewwhowouldwin if I turnedviolent.Ralf,however,gavemeacockysmile.

"Wedidn'tdoanythingyoudidn'twantustodo."Hissmiledturnedcruel."Anddon'teventhinkaboutlayingahandonus.Youstartafight,andKirova'llkickyououttogolivewiththeotherbloodwhores.”

Therestofthestudentswereholdingtheirbreaths,waitingtoseewhatwe'ddo. I don't know how Mr. Nagy could have been oblivious to the dramaoccurringinhisclass.

Iwanted topunchbothof them,hit themsohard that it'dmakeDimitri'sbrawlwith Jesse look like a pat on the back. Iwanted towipe that smirk offRalf'sface.

Butassholeornot,hewasright.IfItouchedthem,Kirovawouldexpelmeintheblinkofaneye.AndifIgotkickedout,Lissawouldbealone.Takingadeepbreath,Imadeoneofthehardestdecisionsofmylife.

Iwalkedaway.Therestofthedaywasmiserable.Inbackingdownfromthefight,Iopened

myself up to mockery from everyone else. The rumors and whispers grewlouder.Peoplestaredatmeopenly.Peoplelaughed.Lissakepttryingtotalktome,toconsoleme,butIignoredevenher.Iwentthroughtherestofmyclasseslikeazombie,andthenIheadedofftopracticewithDimitriasfastIcould.Hegavemeapuzzledlookbutdidn'taskanyquestions.

Aloneinmyroomlateron,Icriedforthefirsttimeinyears.OnceIgotthatoutofmysystem,IwasabouttoputonmypajamaswhenI

heardaknockatmydoor.Dimitri.Hestudiedmyfaceandthenglancedaway,obviously aware I'd been crying. I could tell, too, that the rumors had finallyreachedhim.Heknew.

"Areyouokay?”"Itdoesn'tmatterifIam,remember?"Ilookedupathim."IsLissaokay?

This'llbehardonher.”A funny look crossed his face. I think it astonished him that I'd still be

worriedaboutheratatimelikethis.Hebeckonedmetofollowandledmeouttoabackstairwell,one thatusuallystayed lockedtostudents.But itwasopentonight,andhegesturedmeoutside."Fiveminutes,"hewarned.

Morecuriousthanever,Isteppedoutside.Lissastoodthere.Ishouldhavesensed she was close, but my own out-of-control feelings had obscured hers.Withoutaword,sheputherarmsaroundmeandheldmeforseveralmoments.Ihadtoholdbackmoretears.Whenwebrokeapart,shelookedatmewithcalm,leveleyes.

"I'msorry,"shesaid."Notyourfault.It'llpass.”Sheclearlydoubtedthat.SodidI."Itismyfault,"shesaid."Shedidittogetbackatme.”"She?”"Mia.JesseandRalfaren'tsmartenoughtothinkofsomethinglikethaton

their own.You said it yourself: Jessewas too scared ofDimitri to talkmuchaboutwhathappened.Andwhywaituntilnow?Ithappenedawhileago.Ifhe'dwantedtospreadstuffaround,hewouldhavedoneitbackthen.Mia'sdoingthisasretaliationforyoutalkingaboutherparents.Idon'tknowhowshemanagedit,butshe'stheonewhogotthemtosaythosethings.”

Inmygut,IrealizedLissawasright.JesseandRalfwerethetools;Miahadbeenthemastermind.

"Nothingtobedonenow,"Isighed."Rose—”

"Forgetit,Liss.It'sdone,okay?”Shestudiedmequietlyforafewseconds."Ihaven'tseenyoucryinalong

time.”"Iwasn'tcrying.”Afeelingofheartacheandsympathybeatthroughtomefromthebond."Shecan'tdothistoyou,"sheargued.Ilaughedbitterly,halfsurprisedatmyownhopelessness."Shealreadydid.

Shesaidshe'dgetbackatme,thatIwouldn'tbeabletoprotectyou.Shedidit.When I go back to classes…" A sickening feeling settled in my stomach. Ithought about the friends and respect I'dmanaged to eke out, despite our lowprofile.Thatwouldbegone.Youcouldn'tcomebackfromsomethinglikethis.NotamongtheMoroi.Onceabloodwhore,alwaysabloodwhore.Whatmadeitworsewasthatsomedark,secretpartofmedidlikebeingbitten.

"Youshouldn'thavetokeepprotectingme,"shesaid.Ilaughed."That'smyjob.I'mgoingtobeyourguardian.”"I know, but I meant like this. You shouldn't suffer because of me. You

shouldn'talwayshavetolookafterme.Andyetyoualwaysdo.Yougotmeoutof here. You took care of everything when wewere on our own. Even sincecomingback…you'vealwaysbeentheonewhodoesallthework.EverytimeIbreak down—like last night—you're always there.Me, I'mweak. I'm not likeyou.”

Ishookmyhead."Thatdoesn'tmatter.It'swhatIdo.Idon'tmind.”"Yeah,butlookwhathappened.I'mtheoneshereallyhasagrudgeagainst

—eventhoughIstilldon'tknowwhy.Whatever.It'sgoingtostop.I'mgoingtoprotectyoufromnowon.”

There was a determination in her expression, a wonderful confidenceradiatingoffofherthatremindedmeoftheLissaI'dknownbeforetheaccident.Atthesametime,Icouldfeelsomethingelseinher—somethingdarker,asenseofdeeplyburiedanger.I'dseenthissideofherbeforetoo,andIdidn'tlikeit.Ididn'twanthertappingintoit.Ijustwantedhertobesafe.

"Lissa,youcan'tprotectme.”"Ican,"shesaidfiercely."There'sonethingMiawantsmorethantodestroy

youandme.Shewantstobeaccepted.Shewantstohangoutwiththeroyalsandfeel likeshe'soneof them. Ican take thataway fromher."Shesmiled. "Icanturnthemagainsther.”

"How?”"Bytellingthem."Hereyesflashed.Mymindwasmoving tooslowly tonight. It tookmeawhile tocatchon.

"Liss—no.Youcan'tusecompulsion.Notaroundhere.”

"Imightaswellgetsomeuseoutofthesestupidpowers.”Themoresheusesit,theworseit'llget.Stopher,Rose.Stopherbeforethey

notice,beforetheynoticeandtakeherawaytoo.Getheroutofhere."Liss,ifyougetcaught—”Dimitri stuck his head out. "You've got to get back inside, Rose, before

someonefindsyou.”IshotapanickedlookatLissa,butshewasalreadyretreating."I'lltakecare

ofeverythingthistime,Rose.Everything."

THIRTEEN

THEAFTERMATHOFJESSEANDRalf'slieswasaboutashorribleasI'dexpected. The only way I survived was by putting blinders on, by ignoringeveryone and everything. It kept me sane—barely—but I hated it. I felt likecryingallthetime.Ilostmyappetiteanddidn'tsleepwell.

Yet,nomatterhowbaditgotforme,Ididn'tworryaboutmyselfasmuchasIdidLissa.Shestoodbyherpromisetochangethings.Itwasslowatfirst,butgradually,Iwouldseearoyalortwocomeuptoheratlunchorinclassandsayhello.She'dturnonabrilliantsmile,laughingandtalkingtothemliketheywereallbestfriends.

At first, Ididn'tunderstandhowshewaspulling itoff.She'd toldmeshewouldusecompulsiontowintheotherroyalsoverandturnthemagainstMia.But Ididn't see it happening. Itwaspossible, of course, that shewaswinningpeople over without compulsion. After all, she was funny, smart, and nice.Anyonewouldlikeher.Somethingtoldmeshewasn'twinningfriendstheold-fashionedway,andIfinallyfigureditout.

ShewasusingcompulsionwhenIwasn'taround.Ionlysawherforasmallpartoftheday,andsincesheknewIdidn'tapprove,sheonlyworkedherpowerwhenIwasaway.

Afterafewdaysof thissecretcompulsion,IknewwhatIneededtodo:Ihad toget back inherheadagain.Bychoice. I'ddone it before; I coulddo itagain.

Atleast,that'swhatItoldmyself,sittingandspacingoutinStan'sclassoneday.But itwasn't as easy as I'd thought itwould be, partly because I felt tookeyeduptorelaxandopenmyselftoherthoughts.IalsohadtroublebecauseIpicked a time when she felt relatively calm. She came through the "loudest"whenheremotionswererunningstrong.

Still, I tried to dowhat I'd done before, backwhen I'd spied on her andChristian.Themeditationthing.Slowbreathing.Eyesclosed.Mentalfocuslikethat stillwasn'teasy forme,butat long last Imanaged the transition, slippingintoherheadandexperiencingtheworldashers.ShestoodinherAmericanlitclass, during project-work time, but, like most of the students, she wasn'tworking. She and Camille Conta leaned against a wall on the far side of theroom,talkinginhushedvoices.

"It'sgross,"saidCamillefirmly,afrowncrossingherprettyface.Shehadonablueskirtmadeofvelvet-likefabric,shortenoughtoshowoffherlonglegsandpossiblyraiseeyesaboutthedresscode."Ifyouguysweredoingit,I'mnotsurprisedshegotaddictedanddiditwithJesse.”

"Shedidn'tdoitwithJesse," insistedLissa."Andit'snot likewehadsex.We just didn't have any feeders, that's all."Lissa focusedher full attentiononCamilleandsmiled."It'snobigdeal.Everyone'soverreacting.”

Camille looked like she seriously doubted this, and then, the more shestaredatLissa,themoreunfocusedhereyesbecame.Ablanklookfelloverher.

"Right?"askedLissa,voicelikesilk."It'snotabigdeal.”The frown returned.Camille tried to shake thecompulsion.That fact that

it'devengotten this farwas incredible.AsChristianhadobserved,using itonMoroiwasunheardof.

Camille, although strong-willed, lost the battle. "Yeah," she said slowly."It'sreallynotthatbigadeal.”

"AndJesse'slying.”Shenodded."Definitelylying.”AmentalstrainburnedinsideofLissaassheheldontothecompulsion.It

tookalotofeffort,andshewasn'tfinished."Whatareyouguysdoingtonight?”"CarlyandIaregoingtostudyforMattheson'stestinherroom.”"Inviteme.”Camillethoughtaboutit."Hey,youwanttostudywithus?”"Sure,"saidLissa,smilingather.Camillesmiledback.Lissadroppedthecompulsion,andawaveofdizzinesssweptoverher.She

feltweak. Camille glanced around,momentarily surprised, then shook off theweirdness."Seeyouafterdinnerthen.”

"Seeyou,"murmuredLissa,watchingherwalkaway.WhenCamillewasgone,Lissareacheduptotieherhairupinaponytail.Herfingerscouldn'tquiteget all the hair through, and suddenly, another pair of hands caught hold andhelpedher.Shespunaroundand foundherself staring intoChristian's ice-blueeyes.Shejerkedawayfromhim.

"Don'tdothat!"sheexclaimed,shiveringattherealizationthatithadbeenhisfingerstouchingher.

He gave her his lazy, slightly twisted smile and brushed a few pieces ofunrulyblackhairoutofhisface."Areyouaskingmeororderingme?”

"Shutup."Sheglancedaround,bothtoavoidhiseyesandmakesurenoonesawthemtogether.

"What'sthematter?Worriedaboutwhatyourslaves'llthinkiftheyseeyoutalkingtome?”

"They'remyfriends,"sheretorted."Oh.Right.Of course they are. Imean, fromwhat I saw,Camillewould

probablydoanythingforyou, right?Friends till theend."Hecrossedhisarms

over his chest, and in spite of her anger, she couldn't help but notice how thesilverygrayofhisshirtsetoffhisblackhairandblueeyes.

"Atleastsheisn'tlikeyou.Shedoesn'tpretendtobemyfriendonedayandthenignoremefornoreason.”

Anuncertainlookflickeredacrosshisfeatures.Tensionandangerhadbuiltup between them in the last week, ever since I'd yelled at Christian after theroyalreception.BelievingwhatI'dtoldhim,Christianhadstoppedtalkingtoherandhad treatedher rudelyevery time she'd tried to start a conversation.Now,hurtandconfused,she'dgivenupattemptsatbeingnice.Thesituationjustkeptgettingworseandworse.

Lookingout throughLissa'seyes, Icouldsee thathestillcaredaboutherandstillwantedher.Hispridehadbeenhurt,however,andhewasn'tabout toshowweakness.

"Yeah?"hesaidinalow,cruelvoice."Ithoughtthatwasthewayallroyalswere supposed to act. You certainly seem to be doing a good jobwith it. Ormaybeyou'rejustusingcompulsiononmetomakemethinkyou'reatwo-facedbitch.Maybeyoureallyaren't.ButIdoubtit.”

Lissa flushed at the word compulsion—and cast another worried lookaround—butdecidednot togivehim the satisfactionof arguing anymore.Shesimply gave him one last glare before storming off to join a group of royalshuddled over an assignment Returning to myself, I stared blankly around theclassroom,processingwhatI'dseen.Sometiny, tinypartofmewasstartingtofeelsorryforChristian.Itwasonlyatinypart,though,andveryeasytoignore.

At the beginning of the next day, I headed out to meet Dimitri. Thesepractices were my favorite part of the day now, partly because of my stupidcrushonhimandpartlybecauseIdidn'thavetobearoundtheothers.

HeandIstartedwithrunningasusual,andheranwithme,quietandalmostgentle in his instructions, probably worried about causing some sort ofbreakdown.Heknewabouttherumorssomehow,buthenevermentionedthem.

Whenwefinished,heledmethroughanoffensiveexercisewhereIcoulduse any makeshift weapons I could find to attack him. To my surprise, Imanaged to land a few blows on him, although they seemed to do me moredamage than him. The impacts always mademe stagger back, but he neverbudged. It still didn't stop me from attacking and attacking, fighting with analmostblindrage.Ididn'tknowwhoIreallyfought in thosemoments:MiaorJesseorRalf.Maybeallofthem.

Dimitri finallycalledabreak.Wecarried theequipmentwe'dusedon the

field and returned everything to the supply room. While putting it away, heglancedatmeanddidadoubletake.

"Your hands."He swore in Russian. I could recognize it by now, but herefusedtoteachmewhatanyofitmeant."Whereareyourgloves?”

Ilookeddownatmyhands.They'dsufferedforweeks,andtodayhadonlymadethemworse.Thecoldhadturnedtheskinrawandchapped,andsomepartswere actually bleeding a little. My blisters swelled. "Don't have any. NeverneededtheminPortland.”

Hesworeagainandbeckonedme toachairwhilehe retrieveda first-aidkit.Wipingawaythebloodwithawetcloth,hetoldmegruffly,"We'llgetyousome.”

Ilookeddownatmydestroyedhandsasheworked."Thisisonlythestart,isn'tit?”

"Ofwhat?”"Me.TurningintoAlberta.Her…andalltheotherfemaleguardians.They're

all leathery and stuff. Fighting and training and always being outdoors—theyaren'tprettyanymore."Ipaused."This…thislife.Itdestroysthem.Theirlooks,Imean.”

He hesitated for a moment and looked up from my hands. Those warmbrowneyessurveyedme,andsomethingtightenedinmychest.Damnit.Ihadtostopfeeling thiswayaroundhim."Itwon'thappen toyou.You're too . . ."Hegroped for the rightword, and Imentally substituted all sorts of possibilities.Goddess-like.Scorchingly sexy.Giving up, he simply said, "Itwon't happen toyou.”

He turned his attention back to my hands. Did he…did he think I waspretty?IneverdoubtedthereactionIcausedamongguysmyownage,butwithhim,Ididn'tknow.Thetighteninginmychestincreased.

"Ithappenedtomymom.Sheusedtobebeautiful.Iguessshestillis,sortof. But not theway she used to be."Bitterly, I added, "Haven't seen her in awhile.ShecouldlookcompletelydifferentforallIknow.”

"Youdon'tlikeyourmother,"heobserved."Younoticedthat,huh?”"Youbarelyknowher.”"That's the point. She abandoned me. She left me to be raised by the

Academy.”Whenhe finished cleaningmyopenwounds, he found a jar of salve and

beganrubbingitintotheroughpartsofmyskin.Isortofgotlostinthefeelofhishandsmassagingmine.

"Yousaythat…butwhatelseshouldshehavedone?Iknowyouwanttobe

a guardian. I know how much it means to you. Do you think she feels anydifferently?Doyou think she shouldhavequit to raiseyouwhenyou'd spendmostofyourlifehereanyway?”

I didn't like having reasonable arguments thrown atme. "Are you sayingI'mahypocrite?”

"I'm just saying maybe you shouldn't be so hard on her. She's a veryrespecteddhampirwoman.She'ssetyouonthepathtobethesame.”

"Itwouldn'tkillhertovisitmore,"Imuttered."ButIguessyou'reright.Alittle.Itcouldhavebeenworse,Isuppose.Icouldhavebeenraisedwithbloodwhores.”

Dimitrilookedup."Iwasraisedinadhampircommune.Theyaren'tasbadasyouthink.”

"Oh."Isuddenlyfeltstupid."Ididn'tmean—”"It'sallright."Hefocusedhisattentionbackonmyhands."So,didyou,like,havefamilythere?Growupwiththem?”Henodded."Mymotherandtwosisters.Ididn'tseethemmuchafterIwent

toschool,butwestillkeepintouch.Mostly,thecommunitiesareaboutfamily.There'salotoflovethere,nomatterwhatstoriesyou'veheard.”

Mybitternessreturned,andIglanceddowntohidemyglare.Dimitrihadhad a happier family lifewith his disgracedmother and relatives than I'd hadwithmy"respected"guardianmother.HemostcertainlyknewhismotherbetterthanIknewmine.

"Yeah,but…isn'titweird?Aren'ttherealotofMoroimenvisitingto,youknow?…”

Hishandsrubbedcirclesintomine."Sometimes.”Therewas something dangerous in his tone, something that toldme this

was an unwelcome topic. "I—I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up somethingbad….”

"Actually…you probably wouldn't think it's bad," he said after almost aminute had passed. A tight smile formed on his lips. "You don't know yourfather,doyou?”

Ishookmyhead."No.AllIknowishemusthavehadwickedcoolhair.”Dimitriglancedup,andhiseyessweptme."Yes.Hemusthave."Returning

tomyhands,hesaidcarefully,"Iknewmine.”I froze. "Really?MostMoroi guysdon't stay—Imean, somedo, but you

know,usuallytheyjust—”"Well,he likedmymother."Hedidn't say"liked" inaniceway."Andhe

visitedheralot.He'smysisters'fathertoo.Butwhenhecame…well,hedidn'ttreatmymotherverywell.Hedidsomehorriblethings.”

"Like…" I hesitated. ThiswasDimitri'smotherwewere talking about. Ididn'tknowhowfarIcouldgo."Blood-whorethings?”

"Likebeating-her-upkindsofthings,"herepliedflatly.He'd finished the bandages but was still holding my hands. I don't even

know if he noticed. I certainly did. His were warm and large, with long andgracefulfingers.Fingersthatmighthaveplayedthepianoinanotherlife.

"OhGod,"Isaid.Howhorrible.Itightenedmyhandsinhis.Hesqueezedback."That'shorrible.Andshe…shejustletithappen?”

"Shedid."Thecornerofhismouthturnedupintoasly,sadsmile."ButIdidn't.”

Excitementsurged throughme."Tellme, tellmeyoubeat thecrapoutofhim.”

Hissmilegrew."Idid.”"Wow."Ihadn'tthoughtDimitricouldbeanycooler,butIwaswrong."You

beatupyourdad.Imean,that'sreallyhorrible…whathappened.But,wow.Youreallyareagod.”

Heblinked."What?”"Uh,nothing."Hastily,Itriedtochangethesubject."Howoldwereyou?”Hestillseemedtobepuzzlingoutthegodcomment."Thirteen.”Whoa.Definitelyagod."Youbeatupyourdadwhenyouwere

thirteen?”"Itwasn'tthathard.Iwasstrongerthanhewas,almostastall.Icouldn'tlet

himkeepdoing that.Hehad to learn thatbeingroyalandMoroidoesn'tmeanyoucandoanythingyouwanttootherpeople—evenbloodwhores.”

Istared.Icouldn'tbelievehe'djustsaidthatabouthismother."I'msorry.”"It'sallright.”Piecesclickedintoplaceforme."That'swhyyougotsoupsetaboutJesse,

isn'tit?Hewasanotherroyal,tryingtotakeadvantageofadhampirgirl.”Dimitriavertedhiseyes."Igotupsetoverthatforalotofreasons.Afterall,

youwerebreakingtherules,and…”He didn't finish, but he looked back into my eyes in a way that made

warmthbuildbetweenus.Thinking about Jesse soon darkened my mood, unfortunately. I looked

down."Iknowyouheardwhatpeoplearesaying,thatI—”"Iknowit'snottrue,"heinterrupted.His immediate, certain answer surprisedme, and I stupidly foundmyself

questioningit."Yeah,buthowdoyou—”"Because Iknowyou,"he replied firmly. "Iknowyour character. I know

you'regoingtobeagreatguardian.”His confidence made that warm feeling return. "I'm glad someone does.

EveryoneelsethinksI'mtotallyirresponsible.”"WiththewayyouworrymoreaboutLissathanyourself…"Heshookhis

head."No.Youunderstandyourresponsibilitiesbetterthanguardianstwiceyourage.You'lldowhatyouhavetodotosucceed.”

Ithoughtaboutthat."Idon'tknowifIcandoeverythingIhavetodo.”Hedidthatcoolone-eyebrowthing."Idon'twanttocutmyhair,"Iexplained.Helookedpuzzled."Youdon'thavetocutyourhair.It'snotrequired.”"Alltheotherguardianwomendo.Theyshowofftheirtattoos.”Unexpectedly, he released my hands and leaned forward. Slowly, he

reached out and held a lock of my hair, twisting it around one fingerthoughtfully.Ifroze,andforamoment,therewasnothinggoingonintheworldexcepthimtouchingmyhair.Heletmyhairgo,lookingalittlesurprised—andembarrassed—atwhathe'ddone.

"Don'tcutit,"hesaidgruffly.Somehow,Irememberedhowtotalkagain."Butnoone'llseemytattoosif

Idon't.”Hemovedtowardthedoorway,asmallsmileplayingoverhislips."Wearit

up."

FOURTEEN

ICONTINUEDSPYINGONLISSAoverthenextcoupleofdays,feelingmildlyguiltyeachtime.She'dalwayshateditwhenIdidbyaccident,andnowIdiditonpurpose.

Steadily,Iwatchedasshereintegratedherselfintotheroyalpowerplayersonebyone.She couldn't dogroup compulsion, but catchingoneperson alonewasjustaseffective,ifslower.Andreally,alotdidn'tneedtobecompelledtostarthangingoutwithheragain.Manyweren'tasshallowastheyseemed;theyrememberedLissaandlikedherforwhoshewas.Theyflockedtoher,andnow,amonthandahalfafterourreturntotheAcademy,itwaslikeshe'dneverleftatall.Andduringthisrisetofame,sheadvocatedformeandralliedagainstMiaandJesse.

Onemorning, I tuned into herwhile shewas getting ready for breakfast.She'd spent the last twenty minutes blow-drying and straightening her hair,somethingshehadn'tdoneinawhile.Natalie,sittingonthebedintheirroom,watched the processwith curiosity.WhenLissamovedon tomakeup,Nataliefinallyspoke.

"Hey,we'regoingtowatchamovieinErin'sroomafterschool.Yougoingtocome?"I'dalwaysmadejokesaboutNataliebeingboring,butherfriendErinhadthepersonalityofdrywall.

"Can't.I'mgoingtohelpCamillebleachCarly'shair.”"Yousurespendalotoftimewiththemnow.”"Yeah,Iguess."Lissadabbedmascaraacrossher lashes, instantlymaking

hereyeslookbigger."Ithoughtyoudidn'tlikethemanymore.”"Ichangedmymind.”"Theysureseemtolikeyoualotnow.Imean,notthatanyonewouldn'tlike

you,butonceyoucamebackanddidn'ttalktothem,theyseemedokayignoringyou too. I heard them talking about you a lot. I guess that's not surprising,becausethey'reMia'sfriendstoo,butisn'titweirdhowmuchtheylikeyounow?Like,Ihearthemalwayswaitingtoseewhatyouwanttodobeforetheymakeplansandstuff.Andabunchof themaredefendingRosenow,which isreallycrazy.Not that I believe any of that stuff about her, but I never would havethoughtitwaspossible—”

UnderneathNatalie'sramblingwastheseedofsuspicion,andLissapickeduponit.Natalieprobablyneverwouldhavedreamedofcompulsion,butLissacouldn'triskinnocentquestionsturningintosomethingmore."Youknowwhat?"sheinterrupted."MaybeIwillswingbyErin'safterall.IbetCarly'shairwon't

takethatlong.”TheofferderailedNatalie'strainofthought."Really?Ohwow,thatwould

begreat.Shewas tellingmehowsad shewas thatyou'renot aroundasmuchanymore,andItoldher…"

On it went. Lissa continued her compulsion and return to popularity. Iwatcheditallquietly,alwaysworrying,eventhoughhereffortswerestartingtoreducethestaresandgossipaboutme.

"This is going to backfire," I whispered to her in church one day."Someone'sgoingtostartwonderingandaskingquestions.”

"Stopbeingsomelodramatic.Powershiftsallthetimearoundhere.”"Notlikethis.”"Youdon'tthinkmywinningpersonalitycoulddothisonitsown?”"Ofcourse Ido,but ifChristian spotted it right away, then someone else

will—”Mywordswereinterruptedwhentwoguysfartherdownthepewsuddenly

exploded intosnickers.Glancingup, I saw them looking rightatme,notevenbotheringtohidetheirsmirks.

Lookingaway,Itriedtoignorethem,suddenlyhopingthepriestwouldstartupsoon.ButLissareturnedtheir looks,andasuddenfiercenessflashedacrossher face.Shedidn't sayaword,but their smilesgrewsmallerunderherheavygaze.

"Tellheryou'resorry,"shetoldthem."Andmakesureshebelievesit.”Amomentlater,theypracticallyfellalloverthemselvesapologizingtome

and begging for forgiveness. I couldn't believe it. She'd used compulsion inpublic—inchurch,ofallplaces.Andontwopeopleatthesametime.

Theyfinallyexhaustedtheirsupplyofapologies,butLissawasn'tfinished."That'sthebestyoucando?"shesnapped.Theireyeswidenedinalarm,bothterrifiedthatthey'dangeredher."Liss," I said quickly, touching her arm. "It's okay I, uh, accept their

apologies.”Her face still radiated disapproval, but she finally nodded. The guys

slumpedinrelief.Yikes.I'dneverfeltsorelievedtohaveaservicestart.Throughthebond,I

feltasortofdarksatisfactioncomingfromLissa.Itwasuncharacteristicforher,andIdidn'tlikeit.

Needing to distract myself from her troubling behavior, I studied otherpeopleasIsooftendid.Nearby,ChristianopenlywatchedLissa,atroubledlook

onhisface.Whenhesawme,hescowledandturnedaway.Dimitri sat in the back as usual, for once not scanning every corner for

danger. His attention was turned inward, his expression almost pained. I stilldidn't knowwhy he came to church. He always seemed to be wrestling withsomething.

Inthefront,thepriestwastalkingaboutSt.Vladimiragain."His spiritwas strong,andhewas trulygiftedbyGod.Whenhe touched

them, thecrippledwalked, and theblindcould see.Wherehewalked, flowersbloomed.”

Man,theMoroineededtogetmoresaints—Healingcripplesandblindpeople?I'd forgotten all about St. Vladimir. Mason had mentioned Vladimir

bringingpeoplebackfromthedead,andithadremindedmeofLissaatthetime.Then other things had distracted me. I hadn't thought about the saint or his"shadow-kissed" guardian—and their bond—in a while. How could I haveoverlooked this?Ms.Karp, I realized,wasn't the only otherMoroiwho couldheallikeLissa.Vladimircouldtoo.

"Andallthewhile,themassesgatheredtohim,lovinghim,eagertofollowhisteachingsandhearhimpreachthewordofGod….”

Turning,IstaredatLissa.Shegavemeapuzzledlook."What?”Ididn'tgetachancetoelaborate—Idon'tevenknowifIcouldhaveformed

thewords—becauseIwaswhiskedbacktomyprisonalmostassoonasIstoodupattheendoftheservice.

Back in my room, I went online to research St. Vladimir but turned upnothinguseful.Damnit.Masonhadskimmedthebooksinthelibraryandsaidtherewas little there.What did that leavemewith? I had noway of learningmoreaboutthatdustyoldsaint.

OrdidI?WhathadChristiansaidthatfirstdaywithLissa?Overthere,wehaveanoldboxfullofthewritingsoftheblessedandcrazy

St.Vladimir.The storage room above the chapel. It had the writings. Christian had

pointed themout. Ineeded to lookat them,buthow?Icouldn'task thepriest.Howwouldhereactifhefoundoutstudentsweregoingupthere?It'dputanendtoChristian'slair.Butmaybe…maybeChristianhimselfcouldhelp.

ItwasSunday, though, and Iwouldn't see himuntil tomorrow afternoon.Eventhen,Ididn'tknowifI'dgetachancetotalktohimalone.

Whileheadingouttopracticelater,Istoppedinthedorm'skitchentograbagranola bar. As I did, I passed a couple of novice guys,Miles and Anthony.Mileswhistledwhenhesawme.

"How'sitbeengoing,Rose?Yougettinglonely?Wantsomecompany?”Anthonylaughed."Ican'tbiteyou,butIcangiveyousomethingelseyou

want.”Ihad topass through thedoorway theystood in togetoutside.Glaring, I

pushedpast,butMilescaughtmearoundthewaist,hishandslidingdowntomybutt.

"Getyourhandsoffmyassbefore Ibreakyour face," I toldhim, jerkingaway.Indoingso,IonlybumpedintoAnthony.

"Comeon,"Anthonysaid,"Ithoughtyoudidn'thaveaproblemtakingontwoguysatthesametime.”

Anewvoice spoke up. "If you guys don'twalk away right now, I'll takebothofyouon."Mason.Myhero.

"You'resofullofit,Ashford,"saidMiles.Hewasthebiggerofthetwoandleft me to go square off with Mason. Anthony backed off from me, moreinterestedinwhetherornotthere'dbeafight.Therewassomuchtestosteroneintheair,IfeltlikeIneededagasmask.

"Areyoudoinghertoo?"MilesaskedMason."Youdon'twanttoshare?”"Sayonemorewordabouther,andI'llripyourheadoff.”"Why?She'sjustacheapblood—”Masonpunchedhim.Itdidn'tripMiles'headofforevencauseanythingto

breakorbleed,butitlookedlikeithurt.Hiseyeswidened,andhelungedtowardMason. The sound of doors opening in the hall caused everyone to freeze.Novicesgotinalotoftroubleforfighting.

"Probably some guardians coming." Mason grinned. "You want them toknowyouwerebeatinguponagirl?”

Miles andAnthony exchanged glances. "Come on,"Anthony said. "Let'sgo.Wedon'thavetimeforthis.”

Milesreluctantlyfollowed."I'llfindyoulater,Ashford.”Whentheyweregone,IturnedonMason."'Beatuponagirl'?”"You'rewelcome,"hesaiddrily."Ididn'tneedyourhelp.”"Sure.Youweredoingjustfineonyourown.”"They caught me off guard, that's all. I could have dealt with them

eventually.”"Look,don'ttakebeingpissedoffatthemoutonme.”"Ijustdon'tlikebeingtreatedlike…agirl.”"Youareagirl.AndIwasjusttryingtohelp.”I looked at him and saw the earnestness on his face.Hemeantwell.No

pointinbeingabitchtohimwhenIhadsomanyotherpeopletohatelately.

"Well…thanks.SorryIsnappedatyou.”Wetalkedalittlebit,andImanagedtogethimtospillsomemoreschool

gossip.HehadnoticedLissa'sriseinstatusbutdidn'tseemtofinditstrange.AsI talked to him, I noticed the adoring look he always got around me spreadacrosshisface.Itmademesadtohavehimfeelthatwayaboutme.Guilty,even.

Howhardwoulditbe,Iwondered,togooutwithhim?Hewasnice,funny,andreasonablygood-looking.Wegotalong.WhydidIgetcaughtupinsomanymesseswithotherguyswhenIhadaperfectlysweetoneherewhowantedme?Whycouldn'tIjustreturnhisfeelings?

TheanswercametomebeforeI'devenfinishedaskingmyselfthequestion.Icouldn'tbeMason'sgirlfriendbecausewhenI imaginedsomeoneholdingmeandwhisperingdirtythingsinmyear,hehadaRussianaccent.

Masoncontinuedwatchingmeadmiringly,oblivioustowhatwasgoingoninmyhead.Andseeingthatadoration,IsuddenlyrealizedhowIcoulduseittomyadvantage.

Feelinga littleguilty, I shiftedmyconversation toamore flirty styleandwatchedMason'sglowincrease.

I leanedbesidehimon thewall soourarms just touchedandgavehimalazysmile. "Youknow, I stilldon'tapproveofyourwholehero thing,butyoudidscarethem.Thatwasalmostworthit.”

"Butyoudon'tapprove?”I trailed fingers up his arm. "No. I mean, it's hot in principle but not in

practice.”Helaughed."Thehellitisn't."Hecaughtholdofmyhandandgavemea

knowing look."Sometimesyouneed tobesaved. I thinkyou likebeingsavedsometimesandjustcan'tadmitit.”

"AndIthinkyougetoffonsavingpeopleandjustcan'tadmitit.”"Idon't thinkyouknowwhatgetsmeoff.Savingdamselslikeyouisjust

thehonorablethingtodo,"hedeclaredloftily.Irepressedtheurgetosmackhimovertheuseofdamsels."Thenproveit.

Domeafavorjustbecauseit's'therightthingtodo.'“"Sure,"hesaidimmediately."Nameit.”"IneedyoutogetamessagetoChristianOzera.”Hiseagernessfaltered."Whatthe—?Youaren'tserious.”"Yes.Completely.”"Rose…Ican'ttalktohim.Youknowthat.”"I thoughtyousaidyou'dhelp.I thoughtyousaidhelping 'damsels' is the

honorablethingtodo.”"I don't really see how honor's involved here." I gave him the most

smolderinglookIcouldmanage.Hecaved."Whatdoyouwantmetotellhim?”"Tell him I need St. Vladimir's books. The ones in storage. He needs to

sneakthemtomesoon.Tellhimit'sforLissa.Andtellhim…tellhimIliedthenightofthereception."Ihesitated."TellhimI'msorry.”

"Thatdoesn'tmakeanysense.”"Itdoesn'thaveto.Justdoit.Please?"Iturnedonthebeautyqueensmile

again.Withhastyassurancesthathe'dseewhathecoulddo,heleftforlunch,and

Iwentofftopractice.

FIFTEEN

MASONDELIVERED.Hefoundmethenextdaybeforeschool.Hewascarryingaboxofbooks."Igot them,"he said. "Hurryand take thembeforeyouget in trouble for

talkingtome.”Hehandedthemover,andIgrunted.Theywereheavy."Christiangaveyou

these?”"Yeah.Managedtotalktohimwithoutanyonenoticing.He'sgotkindofan

attitude,didyouevernoticethat?”"Yeah,Inoticed."IrewardedMasonwithasmilethatheateup."Thanks.

Thismeansalot.”I hauled the loot up to my room, fully aware of how weird it was that

someonewhohatedtostudyasmuchasIdidwasabouttogetburiedindustycrap from the fourteenthcentury.When Iopened the firstbook, though, I sawthatthesemustbereprintsofreprintsofreprints,probablybecauseanythingthatoldwouldhavelongsincefallenapart.

Siftingthroughthebooks,Idiscoveredtheyfellintothreecategories:bookswritten by people after St. Vladimir had died, books written by other peoplewhenhewasstillalive,andonediaryofsortswrittenbyhim.WhathadMasonsaidaboutprimaryandsecondarysources?ThoselasttwogroupsweretheonesIwanted.

WhoeverhadreprintedthesehadrewordedthebooksenoughsothatIdidn'thave to readYeOldeEnglish or anything.Or rather,Russian, I supposed. St.Vladimirhadlivedintheoldcountry.

TodayIhealedthemotherofSavawhohaslongsincesufferedfromsharppainswithinherstomach.Hermaladyisnowgone,butGodhasnotallowedmetodosuchathinglightly.Iamweakanddizzy,andthemadnessistryingtoleakintomyhead.IthankGodeverydayforshadow-kissedAnna,forwithouther,Iwouldsurelynotbeabletoendure.

Annaagain.And"shadow-kissed."He talkedabouthera lot, amongotherthings.Mostofthetimehewrotelongsermons,justlikewhatI'dhearinchurch.Superboring.Butothertimes,thebookreadjustlikeadiary,recappingwhathedideachday.Andif it reallywasn't justa loadofcrap,hehealedall the time.Sick people. Injured people. Even plants. He brought dead crops back to lifewhenpeoplewere starving.Sometimeshewouldmake flowersbloom just forthehellofit.

Readingon,IfoundoutthatitwasagoodthingoldVladhadAnnaaround,becausehewasprettymessedup.Themoreheusedhispowers,themoretheystarted to get to him. He'd get irrationally angry and sad. He blamed it ondemons and stupid stuff like that, but it was obvious he suffered fromdepression.Once,headmittedinhisdiary,hetriedtokillhimself.Annastoppedhim.

Later,browsingthroughthebookwrittenbytheguywhoknewVladimir,Iread:

Andmanythinkitmiraculoustoo,thepowertheblessedVladimirshowsoverothers.Moroianddhampirsflocktohimandlistentohiswords,happyjusttobenearhim.Somesayitismadnessthattoucheshimandnotspirit,butmostadorehimandwoulddoanythingheasked.SuchisthewayGodmarkshisfavorites,andifsuchmomentsarefollowedbyhallucinationsanddespair,itisasmallsacrificefortheamountofgoodandleadershiphecanshowamongthepeople.

Itsoundedalotlikewhatthepriesthadsaid,butIsensedmorethanjusta"winning personality" People adored him, would do anything he asked. Yes,Vladimir hadused compulsiononhis followers, Iwas certain.A lot ofMoroihad in those days, before it was banned, but they didn't use it on Moroi ordhampirs.Theycouldn't.OnlyLissacould.

Ishutthebookandleanedbackagainstmybed.Vladimirhealedplantsandanimals. He could use compulsion on a massive scale. And by all accounts,usingthosesortsofpowershadmadehimcrazyanddepressed.

Added into it all, making it that much weirder was that everyone keptdescribing his guardian as "shadow-kissed." That expression had bugged meeversinceIfirstheardit….

"You'reshadow-kissed!Youhavetotakecareofher!”Ms.Karphadshoutedthosewordsatme,herhandsclenchingmyshirtand

jerkingmetowardher.IthadhappenedonanighttwoyearsagowhenI'dbeeninside themain part of the upper school to return a book. It was nearly pastcurfew, and the halls were empty. I'd heard a loud commotion, and thenMs.Karphadcometearingaroundthecorner,lookingfranticandwild-eyed.

Sheshovedmeintoawall,stillgrippingme."Doyouunderstand?”Iknewenoughself-defensethatIcouldhaveprobablypushedheraway,but

myshockkeptmefrozen."No.”"They'recomingforme.They'llcomeforher.”"Who?”"Lissa.You have to protect her.Themore she uses it, theworse it'll get.

Stopher,Rose.Stopherbeforetheynotice,beforetheynoticeandtakeherawaytoo.Getheroutofhere.”

"I…whatdoyoumean?Getheroutof…youmeantheAcademy?”"Yes!Youhavetoleave.You'rebound.It'suptoyou.Takeherawayfrom

thisplace.”Herwordswerecrazy.NoonelefttheAcademy.Yetassheheldmethere

and stared intomy eyes, I began to feel strange.A fuzzy feeling cloudedmymind.Whatshesaidsuddenlysoundedveryreasonable,likethemostreasonable

thingintheworld.Yes.IneededtotakeLissaaway,takeher—Feetpoundedinthehallway,andagroupofguardiansroundedthecorner.I

didn't recognize them; theyweren't fromtheschool.Theypriedheroffofme,restrainingherwildthrashing.SomeoneaskedmeifIwasokay,butIcouldonlykeepstaringatMs.Karp.

"Don't let her use the power!" she screamed. "Save her. Save her fromherself!”

Theguardianshadlaterexplainedtomethatshewasn'twellandhadbeentakentoaplacewhereshecouldrecover.Shewouldbesafeandcaredfor,theyassuredme.Shewouldrecover.

Onlyshehadn't.

Back in the present, I stared at the books and tried to put it all together.Lissa.Ms.Karp.St.Vladimir.

WhatwasIsupposedtodo?Someonerappedatmydoor,andIjerkedoutofmymemories.Noonehad

visitedme,notevenstaff,sincemysuspension.WhenIopenedthedoor,IsawMasoninthehall.

"Twiceinoneday?"Iasked."Andhow'dyouevengetuphere?”He flashed his easy smile. "Someone put a lit match in one of the

bathroom'sgarbagecans.Damnshame.Thestaff'skindofbusy.Comeon, I'mspringingyou.”

I shook my head. Setting fires was apparently a new sign of affection.Christian had done it and nowMason. "Sorry, no savingme tonight. If I getcaught—”

"Lissa'sorders.”Ishutupandlethimsmugglemeoutofthebuilding.Hetookmeoverto

the Moroi dorm and miraculously got me in and up to her room unseen. Iwonderediftherewasadistractingbathroomfireinthisbuildingtoo.

Insideherroom,Ifoundapartyinfullswing.Lissa,Camille,Carly,Aaron,andafewotherroyalssataroundlaughing,listeningtoloudmusic,andpassingaroundbottlesofwhiskey.NoMia,noJesse.Natalie,Inoticedafewmomentslater,satapartfromthegroup,clearlyunsurehowtoactaroundallofthem.Herawkwardnesswastotallyobvious.

Lissastumbled toherfeet, thefuzzyfeelings inourbondindicatingshe'dbeendrinkingforawhile."Rose!"SheturnedtoMasonwithadazzlingsmile."Youdelivered.”

Hesweptheranover-the-topbow."I'matyourcommand.”

Ihopedhe'ddoneitforthethrillofitandnotbecauseofanycompulsion.Lissaslunganarmaroundmywaistandpulledmedownwiththeothers."Jointhefestivities.”

"Whatarewecelebrating?”"Idon'tknow.Yourescapetonight?”Afewoftheothersheldupplasticcups,cheeringandtoastingme.Xander

Badicapouredtwomorecups,handingthemtoMasonandme.Itookminewithasmile,allthewhilefeelinguneasyaboutthenight'sturnofevents.Notsolongago,Iwouldhavewelcomedapartylikethisandwouldhavedownedmydrinkinthirtyseconds.Toomuchbotheredmethistime,though.Likethefactthattheroyals were treating Lissa like a goddess. Like how none of them seemed torememberthatIhadbeenaccusedofbeingabloodwhore.

LikehowLissawascompletelyunhappydespitehersmilesandlaughter."Where'dyougetthewhiskey?"Iasked."Mr.Nagy,"Aaronsaid.HesatveryclosetoLissa.EveryoneknewMr.Nagydrankallthetimeafterschoolandkeptastashon

campus.Hecontinuallyusednewhidingplaces—andstudentscontinuallyfoundthem.

Lissa leaned against Aaron's shoulder. "Aaron helped me break into hisroomandtakethem.Hehadthemhiddeninthebottomofthepaintcloset.”

The others laughed, and Aaron gazed at her with complete and utterworship.Amusingly,Irealizedshehadn'thadtouseanycompulsiononhim.Hewasjustthatcrazyforher.Healwayshadbeen.

"Whyaren'tyoudrinking?"Masonaskedmea littlewhile later, speakingquietlyintomyear.

Iglanceddownatmycup,halfsurprisedtoseeitfull."Idon'tknow.IguessIdon'tthinkguardiansshoulddrinkaroundtheircharges.”

"She'snotyourchargeyet!Youaren'tonduty.Youwon'tbeforalongtime.Sincewhendidyougetsoresponsible?”

Ididn'treallythinkIwasallthatresponsible.ButIwasthinkingaboutwhatDimitrihadsaidaboutbalancingfunandobligation.ItjustseemedwrongtoletmyselfgowildwhenLissawasinsuchavulnerablestatelately.WigglingoutofmytightspotbetweenherandMason,IwalkedoverandsatbesideNatalie.

"HeyNat,you'requiettonight.”Sheheldacupasfullasmine."Soareyou.”Ilaughedsoftly."Iguessso.”Shetiltedherhead,watchingMasonandtheroyalsliketheyweresomesort

of science experiment.They'd consumed a lotmorewhiskey since I'd arrived,and the silliness had shot up considerably. "Weird, huh? You used to be the

centerofattention.Nowsheis.”Iblinkedinsurprise.Ihadn'tconsidereditlikethat."Iguessso.”"Hey,Rose,"saidXander,nearlyspillinghisdrinkashewalkedovertome.

"Whatwasitlike?”"Whatwaswhatlike?”"Lettingsomeonefeedoffyou?”Theothersfellquiet,asortofanticipationsettlingoverthem."Shedidn'tdothat,"saidLissainawarningvoice."Itoldyou.”"Yeah,yeah, IknownothinghappenedwithJesseandRalf.Butyouguys

didit,right?Whileyouweregone?”"Letitgo,"saidLissa.Compulsionworkedbestwithdirecteyecontact,and

hisattentionwasfocusedonme,nother."Imean,it'scoolandeverything.Youguysdidwhatyouhadtodo,right?

It's not like you're a feeder. I just want to know what it was like. DanielleSzelskyletmebiteheronce.Shesaiditdidn'tfeellikeanything.”

There was a collective "ew" from among the girls. Sex and blood withdhampirswasdirty;betweenMoroi,itwascannibalistic.

"Youaresuchaliar,"saidCamille."No, I'm serious. It was just a small bite. She didn't get high like the

feeders.Didyou?"Heputhisfreearmaroundmyshoulder."Didyoulikeit?”Lissa'sfacewentstillandpale.Alcoholmutedthefullforceofherfeelings,

butIcouldreadenoughtoknowhowshefelt.Dark,scaredthoughtstrickledintome—underscoredwithanger.Sheusuallyhadagoodgriponhertemper—unlikeme—butI'dseenitflareupbefore.Onceithadhappenedatapartyverysimilartothisone,justafewweeksafterMs.Karphadbeentakenaway.

Greg Dashkov—a distant cousin of Natalie's—had held the party in hisroom.His parents apparently knew someonewho knew someone, because hehadoneofthebiggestroomsinthedorm.He'dbeenfriendswithLissa'sbrotherbefore the accident and had beenmore than happy to takeAndre's little sisterintohissocialfold.Greghadalsobeenhappytotakemein,andthetwoofushadbeenallovereachotherthatnight.Forasophomorelikeme,beingwitharoyalMoroiseniorwasahugerush.

I drank a lot that night but still managed to keep an eye on Lissa. Shealways wore an edge of anxiety around this many people, but no one reallynoticed,becauseshecouldinteractwiththemsowell.Myheavybuzzkeptalotofherfeelingsfromme,butaslongasshelookedokay,Ididn'tworry.

Mid-kiss, Greg suddenly broke away and looked at something over myshoulder.Weboth sat in the same chair,withmeonhis lap, and I cranedmynecktosee."Whatisit?”

He shook his headwith a sort of amused exasperation. "Wade brought afeeder.”

IfollowedhisgazetowhereWadeVodastoodwithhisarmaroundafrailgirl about my age. She was human and pretty, with wavy blond hair andporcelainskinpalefromsomuchbloodloss.AfewotherguyshadhomedonherandstoodwithWade,laughingandtouchingherfaceandhair.

"She's already fed too much today," I said, observing her coloring andcompletelookofconfusion.

Gregslidhishandbehindmyneckandturnedmebacktohim."Theywon'thurther.”

WekissedawhilelongerandthenIfeltataponmyshoulder."Rose.”IlookedupintoLissa'sface.HeranxiousexpressionstartledmebecauseI

couldn't feel the emotions behind it. Toomuch beer forme. I climbed off ofGreg'slap.

"Whereareyougoing?"heasked."Berightback."IpulledLissaaside,suddenlywishingIwassober."What's

wrong?”"Them.”She nodded toward the guys with the feeder girl. She still had a group

aroundher,andwhensheshiftedtolookatoneofthem,Isawsmallredwoundsscattered on her neck. They were doing a sort of group feeding, taking turnsbitingherandmakinggrosssuggestions.Highandoblivious,sheletthem.

"Theycan'tdothat,"Lissatoldme."She'safeeder.Nobody'sgoingtostopthem.”Lissa lookedupatmewithpleadingeyes.Hurt,outrage, andanger filled

them."Willyou?”I'd always been the aggressive one, looking after her ever sincewewere

little.Seeinghertherenow,soupsetandlookingatmetofixthings,wasmorethanIcouldstand.Givingherashakynod,Istumbledovertothegroup.

"Yousodesperatetogetsomethatyou'vegottodruggirlsnow,Wade?"Iasked.

Heglancedupfromwherehe'dbeenrunninghislipsoverthehumangirl'sneck."Why?AreyoudonewithGregandlookingformore?”

IputmyhandsonmyhipsandhopedIlookedfierce.Thetruthwas,IwasactuallystartingtofeelalittlenauseousfromallI'ddrunk."Aren'tenoughdrugsintheworldtogetmenearyou,"Itoldhim.Afewofhisfriendslaughed."Butmaybeyoucangomakeoutwiththat lampoverthere.Itseemstobeoutof itenough to make even you happy. You don't need her anymore." A few otherpeoplelaughed.

"Thisisn'tanyofyourbusiness,"hehissed."She'sjustlunch."Referringtofeeders asmealswas about the only thingworse than calling dhampirs bloodwhores.

"Thisisn'tafeedingroom.Nobodywantstoseethis.”"Yeah,"agreedaseniorgirl."It'sgross."Afewofherfriendsagreed.Wadeglaredatallofus,methehardest."Fine.Noneofyouhavetoseeit.

Comeon."Hegrabbedthefeedergirl'sarmandjerkedheraway.Clumsily,shestumbledalongwithhimoutoftheroom,makingsoftwhimperingnoises.

"BestIcoulddo,"ItoldLissa.Shestaredatme,shocked."He'sjustgoingtotakehertohisroom.He'lldo

evenworsethingstoher.”"Liss, I don't like it either, but it's not like I can go chase him down or

anything."Irubbedmyforehead."Icouldgopunchhimorsomething,butIfeellikeI'mgoingtothrowupasitis.”

Herfacegrewdark,andshebitherlip."Hecan'tdothat.”"I'msorry.”I returned to the chair with Greg, feeling a little bad about what had

happened. Ididn'twant tosee the feederget takenadvantageofanymore thanLissadid—itremindedmetoomuchofwhata lotofMoroiguysthoughttheycolddotodhampirgirls.ButIalsocouldn'twinthisbattle,nottonight.

GreghadshiftedmearoundtogetabetterangleonmyneckwhenInoticedLissawasgonea fewminutes later.Practically falling, Iclamberedoffhis lapandlookedaround."Where'sLissa?”

Hereachedforme."Probablythebathroom.”I couldn't feel a thing through the bond. The alcohol had numbed it.

Stepping out into the hallway, I breathed a sigh of relief at escaping the loudmusicandvoices. Itwasquietouthere—except foracrashingsoundacoupleroomsdown.Thedoorwasajar,andIpushedmywayinside.

The feeder girl cowered in a corner, terrified. Lissa stood with armscrossed, her face angry and terrible. Shewas staring atWade intently, and hestaredback,enchanted.Healsoheldabaseballbat,anditlookedlikehe'duseditalready,becausetheroomwastrashed:bookshelves,thestereo,themirror….

"Break the window too," Lissa told him smoothly. "Come on. It doesn'tmatter.”

Hypnotized,hewalkedovertothelarge,tintedwindow.Istared,mymouthnearlyhittingthefloor,ashepulledbackandslammedthebatintotheglass.Itshattered, sending shards everywhere and letting in the earlymorning light itnormallykeptblockedout.Hewincedasitshoneinhiseyes,buthedidn'tmoveaway.

"Lissa,"Iexclaimed."Stopit.Makehimstop.”"Heshouldhavestoppedearlier.”Ibarelyrecognizedthelookonherface.I'dneverseenhersoupset,andI'd

certainlyneverseenherdoanything like this. Iknewwhat itwas,ofcourse. Iknew right away. Compulsion. For all I knew, she was seconds away fromhavinghimturnthebatonhimself.

"Please,Lissa.Don'tdoitanymore.Please.”Through the fuzzy, alcoholic buzz, I felt a trickle of her emotions. They

were strong enough to practically knock me over. Black. Angry. Merciless.StartlingfeelingstobecomingfromsweetandsteadyLissa.I'dknownhersincekindergarten,butinthatmoment,Ibarelyknewher.

AndIwasafraid."Please,Lissa,"Irepeated."He'snotworthit.Lethimgo.”She didn't look at me. Her stormy eyes were focused entirely onWade.

Slowlycarefully,he liftedup thebat, tilting it so that it linedupwithhisownskull.

"Liss,"Ibegged.OhGod.Iwasgoingtohavetotackleherorsomethingtomakeherstop."Don'tdoit.”

"Heshouldhavestopped,"Lissasaidevenly.Thebatquitmoving. Itwasnow at exactly the right distance to gainmomentum and strike. "He shouldn'thavedonethattoher.Peoplecan'ttreatotherpeoplelikethat—evenfeeders.”

"Butyou'rescaringher,"Isaidsoftly."Lookather.”Nothinghappenedat first, thenLissa lethergaze flick toward the feeder.

The human girl still sat huddled in a corner, arms wrapped around herselfprotectively.Herblueeyeswereenormous,andlightreflectedoffherwet,tear-streakedface.Shegaveachoked,terrifiedsob.

Lissa's face stayed impassive. Inside her, I could feel the battle she waswaging for control. Some part of her didn't want to hurt Wade, despite theblindingangerthatotherwisefilledher.Herfacecrumpled,andshesqueezedhereyes shut. Her right hand reached out to her left wrist and clenched it, nailsdiggingdeepintotheflesh.Sheflinchedatthepain,butthroughthebond,IfelttheshockofthepaindistractherfromWade.

She let go of the compulsion, and he dropped the bat, suddenly lookingconfused. I let go of the breath I'd been holding. In the hallway, footstepssounded.I'dleftthedooropen,andthecrashhadattractedattention.Acoupleofdormstaffmembersburstintotheroom,freezingwhentheysawthedestructioninfrontofthem.

"Whathappened?”Therestofuslookedateachother.Wadelookedcompletelylost.Hestared

attheroom,atthebat,andthenatLissaandme."Idon'tknow…Ican't…"Heturnedhisfullattentiontomeandsuddenlygrewangry."Whatthe—itwasyou!Youwouldn'tletthefeederthinggo.”

The dorm workers looked at me questioningly, and in a few seconds, Imadeupmymind.

Youhavetoprotecther.Themoresheusesit, theworseit'llget.Stopher,Rose.Stopherbeforetheynotice,beforetheynoticeandtakeherawaytoo.Getheroutofhere.

IcouldseeMs.Karp'sfaceinmymind,pleadingfrantically.IgaveWadeahaughtylook,knowingfullwellnoonewouldquestionaconfessionImadeorevensuspectLissa.

"Yeah,well,ifyou'dlethergo,"Itoldhim,"Iwouldn'thavehadtodothis.”Saveher.Saveherfromherself.Afterthatnight,Ineverdrankagain.Irefusedtoletmyguarddownaround

Lissa.Andtwodayslater,whileIwassupposedtobesuspendedfor"destructionofproperty,"ItookLissaandbrokeoutoftheAcademy.

Back in Lissa's room, with Xander's arm around me and her angry andupset eyes on us, I didn't know if she'd do anything drastic again. But thesituationremindedme toomuchof thatonefromtwoyearsago,andIknewIhadtodefuseit.

"Justalittleblood,"Xanderwassaying."Iwon'ttakemuch.Ijustwanttoseewhatdhampirtasteslike.Nobodyherecares.”

"Xander,"growledLissa,"leaveheralone.”I slipped out from under his arm and smiled, looking for a funny retort

ratherthanonethatmightstartafight."Comeon,"Iteased."Ihadtohitthelastguywhoaskedme that, andyou're ahell of a lotprettier than Jesse. It'dbe awaste.”

"Pretty?"heasked."I'mstunninglysexybutnotpretty.”Carly laughed. "No, you're pretty. Todd told me you buy some kind of

Frenchhairgel.”Xander, distracted as so many drunk people easily are, turned around to

defend his honor, forgetting me. The tension disappeared, and he took theteasingabouthishairwithagoodattitude.

Acrosstheroom,Lissametmyeyeswithrelief.ShesmiledandgavemeasmallnodofthanksbeforeshereturnedherattentiontoAaron.

Sixteen

THENEXTDAY,ITFULLYhitmehowmuch thingshadchangedsincetheJesse-and-Ralf rumors first started.For somepeople, I remainedanonstopsourceofwhispers and laughter.FromLissa's converts, I received friendlinessandoccasionaldefense.Overall,Irealized,ourclassmatesactuallygavemeverylittle of their attention anymore. This became especially truewhen somethingnewdistractedeveryone.

LissaandAaron.Apparently,Mia had found about the party and had blown up when she

learnedthatAaronhadbeentherewithouther.She'dbitchedathimandtoldhimthatifhewantedtobewithher,hecouldn'trunaroundandhangoutwithLissa.SoAaronhaddecidedhedidn'twanttobewithher.He'dbrokenupwithherthatmorning…andmovedon.

NowheandLissawereallovereachother.Theystoodaroundinthehalland at lunch, armswrapped around one another, laughing and talking. Lissa'sbondfeelingsshowedonlymildinterest,despitehergazingathimasthoughhewas the most fascinating thing on the planet. Most of this was for show,unbeknownsttohim.Helookedasthoughhecouldhavebuiltashrineatherfeetatanymoment.

Andme?Ifeltill.Myfeelingswerenothing,however,compared toMia's.At lunch, shesat

on the far side of the room from us, eyes fixed pointedly ahead, ignoring theconsolationsof thefriendsnearher.Shehadblotchypinkpatchesonherpale,round cheeks, and her eyes were red-rimmed. She said nothingmeanwhen Iwalkedpast.Nosmugjokes.Nomockingglares.Lissahaddestroyedher,justasMiahadvowedtodous.

TheonlypersonmoremiserablethanMiawasChristian.Unlikeher,hehadno qualms about studying the happy couple while wearing an open look ofhatredonhisface.Asusual,nooneexceptmeevennoticed.

AfterwatchingLissa andAaronmakeout for the tenth time, I left lunchearlyandwenttoseeMs.Carmack,theteacherwhotaughtelementalbasics.I'dbeenwantingtoaskhersomethingforawhile.

"Rose, right?" She seemed surprised to seeme but not angry or annoyedlikehalftheotherteachersdidlately.

"Yeah.Ihaveaquestionabout,um,magic.”Sheraisedaneyebrow.Novicesdidn't takemagicclasses."Sure.Whatdo

youwanttoknow?”"IwaslisteningtothepriesttalkaboutSt.Vladimirtheotherday…Doyou

knowwhatelementhespecializedin?Vladimir,Imean.Notthepriest.”Shefrowned."Odd.Asfamousasheisaroundhere,I'msurpriseditnever

comesup.I'mnoexpert,butinallthestoriesI'veheard,heneverdidanythingthat I'd say connects to any one of the elements. Either that or no one everrecordedit.”

"Whatabouthishealings?"Ipushedfurther."Is thereanelement that letsyouperformthose?”

"No, not that I know of."Her lips quirked into a small smile. "People offaithwouldsayhehealedthroughthepowerofGod,notanysortofelementalmagic.After all, one thing the stories are certain about is that hewas 'full ofspirit.'“

"Isitpossiblehedidn'tspecialize?”Her smile faded. "Rose, is this really about St. Vladimir? Or is it about

Lissa?”"Notexactly…"Istammered."Iknowit'shardonher—especiallyinfrontofallherclassmates—butshe

hastobepatient,"sheexplainedgently."Itwillhappen.Italwayshappens.”"Butsometimesitdoesn't.”"Rarely.But I don't think she'll be one of those. She's got a higher-than-

averageaptitudeinallfour,evenifshehasn'thitspecializedlevels.Oneofthemwillshootupanydaynow.”

That gave me an idea. "Is it possible to specialize in more than oneelement?”

She laughed and shook her head. "No. Too much power. No one couldhandleallthatmagic,notwithoutlosinghermind.”

Oh.Great."Okay.Thanks."Istartedtoleave,thenthoughtofsomethingelse."Hey,do

yourememberMs.Karp?Whatdidshespecializein?”Ms. Carmack got that uncomfortable look other teachers did whenever

anyonementionedMs.Karp."Actually—”"What?”"I almost forgot. I think she really was one of the rare ones who never

specialized.Shejustalwayskeptaverylowcontroloverallfour."

I spent the rest of my afternoon classes thinking about Ms. Carmack'swords, trying towork themintomyunifiedLissa-Karp-Vladimir theory. IalsowatchedLissa.Somanypeoplewantedtotalktohernowthatshebarelynoticedmysilence.Everysooften, though, I'dseeherglanceatmeandsmile,a tired

look inher eyes.Laughing andgossiping all daywithpeople sheonly sort oflikedwastakingitstollonher.

"Themission'saccomplished,"Itoldherafterschool."WecanstopProjectBrainwash.”

Wesatonbenchesinthecourtyard,andsheswungherlegsbackandforth."Whatdoyoumean?”

"You've done it. You stopped people frommakingmy life horrible. YoudestroyedMia.YoustoleAaron.Playwithhimforanothercoupleweeks, thendrophimandtheotherroyals.You'llbehappier.”

"Youdon'tthinkI'mhappynow?”"Iknowyouaren't.Someofthepartiesarefun,butyouhatepretendingto

befriendswithpeopleyoudon'tlike—andyoudon'tlikemostofthem.IknowhowmuchXanderpissedyouofftheothernight.”

"He's a jerk, but I can deal with that. If I stop hanging out with them,everything'llgoback to thewayitwas.Miawill juststartupagain.Thisway,shecan'tbotherus.”

"It'snotworthitifeverythingelseisbotheringyou.”"Nothing'sbotheringme."Shesoundedalittledefensive."Yeah?"Iaskedmeanly."Becauseyou'reso in lovewithAaron?Because

youcan'twaittohavesexwithhimagain?”Sheglaredatme."HaveImentionedyoucanbeahugebitchsometimes?”I ignored that. "I'm just saying you've got enough shit to worry about

without all this. You're burning yourself out with all the compulsion you'reusing.”

"Rose!"Sheglancedanxiouslyaround."Bequiet!”"But it's true.Using it all the time isgoing to screwwithyourhead.For

real.”"Don'tyouthinkyou'regettingcarriedaway?”"WhataboutMs.Karp?”Lissa'sexpressionwentverystill."Whatabouther?”"You.You'rejustlikeher.”"No,I'mnot!"Outrageflashedinthosegreeneyes."Shehealedtoo.”Hearingmetalkaboutthisshockedher.Thistopichadweighedusdownfor

solong,butwe'dalmostneverspokenaboutit."Thatdoesn'tmeananything.”"Youdon't think itdoes?Doyouknowanyoneelsewhocando that?Or

canusecompulsionondhampirsandMoroi?”"Sheneverusedcompulsionlikethat,"sheargued.

"Shedid.Shetriedtouseitonmethenightsheleft.Itstartedtowork,butthentheytookherawaybeforeshefinished."Orhadthey?Afterall,itwasonlya month later that Lissa and I had run away from the Academy. I'd alwaysthought thatwasmyown idea,butmaybeMs.Karp's suggestionhadbeen thetrueforcebehindit.

Lissa crossed her arms. Her face looked defiant, but her emotions feltuneasy. "Fine.Sowhat?Soshe's a freak likeme.Thatdoesn'tmeananything.Shewentcrazybecause…well,thatwasjustthewayshewas.That'sgotnothingtodowithanythingelse.”

"But it'snot justher," Isaidslowly."There'ssomeoneelse likeyouguys,too.SomeoneIfound."Ihesitated."YouknowSt.Vladimir….”

Andthat'swhenIfinallyletitallout.Itoldhereverything.Itoldherabouthowshe,Ms.Karp,andSt.Vladimircouldallhealandusesuper-compulsion.Althoughitmadehersquirm,Itoldherhowtheytoogreweasilyupsetandhadtriedtohurtthemselves.

"Hetriedtokillhimself,"Isaid,notmeetinghereyes."AndIusedtonoticemarksonMs.Karp'sskin—likeshe'dclawatherownface.Shetriedtohideitwith her hair, but I could see the old scratches and tell when she made newones.”

"Itdoesn'tmeananything,"insistedLissa."It—it'sallacoincidence.”Shesounded likeshewanted tobelieve that,and inside, somepartofher

really did. But therewas another part of her, a desperate part of her that hadwantedforsolongtoknowthatshewasn'tafreak,thatshewasn'talone.Evenifthenewswasbad,atleastnowsheknewtherewereotherslikeher.

"Isitacoincidencethatneitherofthemseemstohavespecialized?”I recountedmyconversationwithMs.Carmack and explainedmy theory

aboutspecializinginallfourelements.IalsorepeatedMs.Carmack'scommentabouthowthatwouldburnsomeoneout.

LissarubbedhereyeswhenIfinished,smudgingalittleofhermakeup.Shegavemeaweaksmile."Idon'tknowwhat'scrazier:whatyou'reactuallytellingmeorthefactthatyouactuallyreadsomethingtofindallthisout.”

Igrinned,relievedthatshe'dactuallymusteredajoke."Hey,Iknowhowtoreadtoo.”

"Iknowyoudo.IalsoknowittookyouayeartoreadTheDaVinciCode."Shelaughed.

"Thatwasn'tmyfault!Anddon'ttrytochangethesubject.”"I'mnot."Shesmiled,thensighed."Ijustdon'tknowwhattothinkaboutall

this.”"There's nothing to think about. Just don't do stuff that'll upset you.

Remember coasting through the middle? Go back to that. It's a lot easier onyou.”

Sheshookherhead."Ican'tdothat.Notyet.”"Whynot?Ialreadytoldyou—"Istopped,wonderingwhyIhadn'tcaught

onbefore. "It'snot justMia.You'redoingall thisbecauseyou feel likeyou'resupposedto.You'restilltryingtobeAndre.”

"Myparentswouldhavewantedmeto—”"Yourparentswouldhavewantedyoutobehappy.”"It'snotthateasy,Rose.Ican'tignorethesepeopleforever.I'mroyaltoo.”"Mostofthemsuck.”"AndalotofthemaregoingtohelpruletheMoroi.Andreknewthat.He

wasn't like the others, but he did what he had to do because he knew howimportanttheywere.”

I leaned back against the bench. "Well, maybe that's the problem.We'redeciding who's 'important' based on family alone, so we end up with thesescrewed-uppeoplemakingdecisions.That'swhyMoroi numbers aredroppingandbitcheslikeTatianaarequeen.Maybethereneedstobeanewroyalsystem.”

"Comeon,Rose.Thisisthewayitis;that'sthewayit'sbeenforcenturies.We have to live with that." I glared. "Okay, how about this?" she continued."You'reworriedaboutmebecominglikethem—likeMs.KarpandSt.Vladimir—right?Well,shesaidIshouldn'tusethepowers,thatitwouldmakethingsgetworseifIdid.WhatifIjuststop?Compulsion,healing,everything.”

I narrowed my eyes. "You could do that?" The convenient compulsionaside, thatwaswhat I'dwanted her to do thewhole time.Her depression hadstarted at the same time the powers emerged, just after the accident. I had tobelievetheywereconnected,particularlyinlightoftheevidenceandMs.Karp'swarnings.

"Yes.”Herfacewasperfectlycomposed,herexpressionseriousandsteady.With

herpalehairwovenintoaneatFrenchbraidandasuedeblazeroverherdress,shelookedlikeshecouldhavetakenherfamily'splaceonthecouncilrightnow.

"You'dhavetogiveupeverything,"Iwarned."Nohealing,nomatterhowcuteandcuddlytheanimal.Andnomorecompulsiontodazzletheroyals.”

Shenoddedseriously."Icandoit.Willthatmakeyoufeelbetter?”"Yeah, but I'd feel even better if you stopped magic andwent back to

hangingoutwithNatalie.”"Iknow,IknowButIcan'tstop,notnowatleast.”Icouldn'tgethertobudgeonthat—yet—butknowingthatshewouldavoid

usingherpowersrelievedme.

"Allright,"Isaid,pickingupmybackpack.Iwaslateforpractice.Again."Youcankeepplayingwiththebratpack,solongasyoukeepthe'otherstuff’incheck."Ihesitated."Andyouknow,youreallyhavemadeyourpointwithAaronand Mia. You don't have to keep him around to keep hanging out with theroyals.”

"WhydoIkeepgettingthefeelingyoudon'tlikehimanymore?”"I like him okay—which is about asmuch as you like him.And I don't

thinkyoushouldgethotandsweatywithpeopleyouonlylike'okay'“Lissawidened her eyes in pretend astonishment. "Is this RoseHathaway

talking? Have you reformed? Or do you have someone you like 'more thanokay'?”

"Hey"Isaiduncomfortably,"I'mjustlookingoutforyou.That,andInevernoticedhowboringAaronisbefore.”

Shescoffed."Youthinkeveryone'sboring.”"Christianisn't.”ItslippedoutbeforeIcouldstopit.Shequitsmiling."He'sajerk.Hejust

stoppedtalkingtomefornoreasononeday"Shecrossedherarms."Anddon'tyouhatehimanyway?”

"Icanstillhatehimandthinkhe'sinteresting.”ButIwasalsostartingtothinkthatImighthavemadeabigmistakeabout

Christian.Hewascreepyanddarkandlikedtosetpeopleonfire, true.Ontheother hand, hewas smart and funny—in a twistedway—and somehow had acalmingeffectonLissa.

ButI'dmesseditallup.I'dletmyangerandjealousygetthebestofmeandendedupseparatingthem.IfI'dlethimgotoherinthegardenthatnight,maybeshewouldn'thavegottenupsetandcutherself.Maybe they'dbe togethernow,awayfromalltheschoolpolitics.

Fatemusthavebeenthinkingthesamething,becausefiveminutesafterIleft Lissa, I passed Christian walking across the quad. Our eyes locked for amoment beforewe passed each other. I nearly keptwalking.Nearly.Taking adeepbreath,Icametoastop.

"Wait…Christian." I called out to him.Damn, I was so late for training.Dimitriwasgoingtokillme.

Christianspunaroundtofaceme,handsstuffedinthepocketsofhislongblackcoat,hispostureslumpedanduncaring.

"Yeah?”"Thanks for the books." He didn't say anything. "The ones you gave to

Mason.”"Oh,Ithoughtyoumeanttheotherbooks.”

Smartass."Aren'tyougoingtoaskwhattheywerefor?”"Yourbusiness.Justfiguredyouwereboredbeingsuspended.”"I'dhavetobeprettyboredforthat.”Hedidn't laughatmy joke. "Whatdoyouwant,Rose? I'vegotplaces to

be.”Iknewhewaslying,butmysarcasmnolongerseemedasfunnyasusual."I

wantyouto,uh,hangoutwithLissaagain.”"Areyouserious?"He studiedme closely, suspicion all over him. "After

whatyousaidtome?”"Yeah,well…Didn'tMasontellyou?…”Christian'slipsturnedupintoasneer."Hetoldmesomething.”"And?”"And I don't want to hear it fromMason."His sneer cranked upwhen I

glared."Yousenthimtoapologizeforyou.Stepupanddoityourself.”"You'reajerk,"Iinformedhim."Yeah.Andyou'realiar.Iwanttoseeyoueatyourpride.”"I'vebeeneatingmypridefortwoweeks,"Igrowled.Shrugging,heturnedaroundandstartedtowalkaway."Wait!" Icalled,puttingmyhandonhisshoulder.Hestoppedand looked

backatme."Allright,allright.Iliedabouthowshefelt.Sheneversaidanyofthatstuffaboutyou,okay?Shelikesyou.ImadeitupbecauseIdon'tlikeyou.”

"Andyetyouwantmetotalktoher.”Whenthenextwordsleftmylips,Icouldbarelybelieveit."Ithink…you

mightbe…goodforher.”Westaredat eachother for severalheavymoments.His smirkdriedupa

little.Notmuchsurprisedhim.Thisdid."I'msorry.Ididn'thearyou.Canyourepeatthat?"hefinallyasked.Ialmostpunchedhimintheface."Willyoustopitalready?Iwantyouto

hangoutwithheragain.”"No.”"Look,Itoldyou,Ilied—”"It'snotthat.It'sher.YouthinkIcantalktohernow?She'sPrincessLissa

again." Venom dripped off his words. "I can't go near her, not when she'ssurroundedbyallthoseroyals.”

"You're royal too," I said,more tomyself than him. I kept forgetting theOzeraswereoneofthetwelvefamilies.

"Doesn'tmeanmuchinafamilyfullofStrigoi,huh?”"Butyou'renot—wait.That'swhysheconnects toyou," I realizedwitha

start.

"BecauseI'mgoingtobecomeaStrigoi?"heaskedsnidely."No…becauseyoulostyourparentstoo.Bothofyousawthemdie.”"Shesawhersdie.Isawminemurdered.”I flinched. "I know. I'm sorry, itmust have been…well, I don't have any

ideawhatitwaslike.”Those crystal-blue eyes went unfocused. "It was like seeing an army of

Deathinvademyhouse.”"Youmean…yourparents?”He shook his head. "The guardians who came to kill them. I mean, my

parentswerescary,yeah,but theystill lookedlikemyparents—alittlepaler, Iguess.Someredintheireyes.Buttheywalkedandtalkedthesameway.Ididn'tknowanythingwaswrongwith them, butmy aunt did.Shewaswatchingmewhentheycameforme.”

"Weretheygoingtoconvertyou?"I'dforgottenmyoriginalmissionhere,toocaughtupinthestory."Youwerereallylittle.”

"IthinktheyweregoingtokeepmeuntilIwasolder, thenturnme.AuntTashawouldn'tletthemtakeme.Theytriedtoreasonwithher,converthertoo,butwhenshewouldn'tlisten,theytriedtotakeherbyforce.Shefoughtthem—gotreallymessedup—andthentheguardiansshowedup."Hiseyesdriftedbacktome. He smiled, but there was no happiness in it. "Like I said, an army ofDeath.Ithinkyou'recrazy,Rose,butifyouturnoutliketherestofthem,you'regoing tobe able todo some seriousdamageoneday.Even Iwon'tmesswithyou.”

Ifelthorrible.He'dhadamiserablelife,andI'dtakenawayoneofthefewgoodthingsinit."Christian,I'msorryforscrewingthingsupbetweenyouandLissa.Itwasstupid.Shewantedtobewithyou.Ithinkshestilldoesnow.Ifyoucouldjust—”

"Itoldyou,Ican't.”"I'mworriedabouther.She'sintoallthisroyalstuffbecauseshethinksit's

goingtogetbackatMia—she'sdoingitforme.”"Andyouaren'tgrateful?"Thesarcasmreturned."I'mworried.Shecan'thandleplayingallthesecattypoliticalgames.Itisn't

goodforher,butshewon'tlistentome.Icould…Icouldusehelp.”"She could use help. Hey, don't look so surprised—I know there's

something funny going onwith her.And I'm not even talking about thewristthing.”

Ijumped."Didshetellyou?…"Whynot?She'dtoldhimeverythingelse."Shedidn'tneedto,"hesaid."I'vegoteyes."Imusthavelookedpathetic,

because he sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Look, if I catch Lissa

alone…I'lltrytotalktoher.Buthonestly…ifyoureallywanttohelpher…well,IknowI'msupposedtobeallanti-establishment,butyoumightgetthebesthelptalking to somebody else. Kirova. Your guardian guy. I don't know. Someonewhoknowssomething.Someoneyoutrust.”

"Lissawouldn'tlikethat."Iconsidered."NeitherwouldI.”"Yeah,well,weallhavetodothingswedon'tlike.That'slife.”Mysnarkyswitchflippedon."Whatareyou,anafter-schoolspecial?”A ghostly smile flickered across his face. "If you weren't so psychotic,

you'dbefuntohangaround.”"Funny,Ifeelthatwayaboutyoutoo.”Hedidn'tsayanythingelse,butthesmilegrew,andhewalkedaway.

Seventeen

A FEW DAYS LATER, LISSA found me outside the commons anddeliveredthemostastonishingnews.

"UncleVictor'sgettingNatalieoffcampusthisweekendtogoshoppinginMissoula.Forthedance.TheysaidIcouldcomealong.”

Ididn'tsayanything.Shelookedsurprisedatmysilence."Isn'tthatcool?”"Foryou,Iguess.Nomallsordancesinmyfuture.”She smiled excitedly. "He told Natalie she could bring two other people

besidesme.IconvincedhertobringyouandCamille.”Ithrewupmyhands."Well,thanks,butI'mnotevensupposedtogotothe

libraryafterschool.Noone'sgoingtoletmegotoMissoula.”"UncleVictorthinkshecangetHeadmistressKirovatoletyougo.Dimitri's

tryingtoo.”"Dimitri?”"Yeah.Hehas togowithme if I leave campus."Shegrinned, takingmy

interestinDimitriasinterestinthemall."Theyfiguredoutmyaccountfinally—Igotmyallowanceback.Sowecanbuyotherstuffalongwithdresses.Andyouknowiftheyletyougotothemall,they'llhavetoletyougotothedance.”

"Dowegotodancesnow?"Isaid.Weneverhadbefore.School-sponsoredsocialevents?Noway.

"Ofcoursenot.Butyouknow there'llbeallkindsof secretparties.We'llstartatthedanceandsneakoff."Shesighedhappily."Mia'ssojealousshecanbarelystandit.”

Shewentonaboutallthestoreswe'dgoto,allthethingswe'dbuy.Iadmit,Iwaskindofexcitedatthethoughtofgettingsomenewclothes,butIdoubtedI'dactuallygetthismythicalrelease.

"Ohhey," she saidexcitedly. "You should see these shoesCamille letmeborrow. I never knew we wore the same size. Hang on." She opened herbackpackandbeganriflingthroughit.

Suddenly,shescreamedandthrewitdown.Booksandshoesspilledout.Sodidadeaddove.

Itwasoneof thepalebrownmourningdoves that satonwires along thefreewayandunder treesoncampus. Ithadsomuchbloodon it that Icouldn'tfigureoutwherethewoundwas.Whoknewsomethingsosmallevenhadthatmuchblood?Regardless,thebirdwasdefinitelydead.

Coveringhermouth,Lissastaredwordlessly,eyeswide."Sonofabitch,"Iswore.Withouthesitating,Igrabbedastickandpushed

thelittlefeatheredbodyaside.Whenitwasoutoftheway,Istartedshovingherstuffback into thebackpack, tryingnot to thinkaboutdead-birdgerms. "Whythehelldoesthiskeep—Liss!”

I leaptoverandgrabbedher,pullingheraway.Shehadbeenkneelingonthe ground, with her hand outstretched to the dove. I don't think she'd evenrealizedwhatshewasabouttodo.Theinstinctinherwassostrong,itactedonitsown.

"Lissa," I said, tightening my hand around hers. She was still leaningtowardthebird."Don't.Don'tdoit.”

"Icansaveit.”"No,youcan't.Youpromised,remember?Somethingshave tostaydead.

Letthisonego."Stillfeelinghertension,Ipleaded."Please,Liss.Youpromised.Nomorehealings.Yousaidyouwouldn't.Youpromisedme.”

Afterafewmoremoments,Ifeltherhandrelaxandherbodyslumpagainstmine."Ihatethis,Rose.Ihateallofthis.”

Nataliewalkedoutsidethen,oblivioustothegruesomesightawaitingher."Hey,doyouguys—ohmyGod!"shesquealed,seeingthedove."Whatis

that?”IhelpedLissaaswerosetoourfeet."Another,um,prank.”"Isit…dead?"Shescrunchedupherfaceindisgust."Yes,"Isaidfirmly.Natalie, picking up on our tension, lookedbetween the twoof us. "What

elseiswrong?”"Nothing."IhandedLissaherbackpack."Thisisjustsomeone'sstupid,sick

joke,andI'mgoingtotellKirovasotheycancleanthisup.”Natalieturnedaway,lookingalittlegreen."Whydopeoplekeepdoingthis

toyou?It'shorrible.”LissaandIexchangedlooks."I have no idea," I said. Yet as I walked to Kirova's office, I started to

wonder.Whenwe'dfoundthefox,Lissahadhintedthatsomeonemustknowabout

the raven. Ihadn'tbelieved that.We'dbeenalone in thewoods thatnight,andMs.Karpwouldn't have told anyone.Butwhat if someone actually had seen?Whatifsomeonekeptdoingthisnottoscareher,buttoseeifshe'dhealagain?Whathadtherabbitnotesaid?Iknowwhatyouare.

Ididn'tmentionanyofthistoLissa;Ifiguredtherewereonlysomanyofmyconspiracytheoriesshecouldhandle.Besides,whenIsawherthenextday,she'dpracticallyforgottenthedoveinlightofothernews:Kirovahadgivenmepermissiontogoonthetripthatweekend.Theprospectofshoppingcanbrighten

a lot of dark situations—even animal murder—and I put my ownworries onhold.

Only, when the time came, I discovered my release came with stringsattached.

"HeadmistressKirovathinksyou'vedonewellsincecomingback,"Dimitritoldme.

"AsidefromstartingafightinMr.Nagy'sclass?”"Shedoesn'tblameyouforthat.Notentirely.Iconvincedheryouneededa

break…andthatyoucouldusethisasatrainingexercise.”"Trainingexercise?”Hegavemeabriefexplanationaswewalkedouttomeettheothersgoing

with us. VictorDashkov, as sickly as ever, was therewith his guardians, andNataliepracticallybarreledintohim.Hesmiledandgaveheracarefulhug,onethatendedwhenacoughingfittookover.Natalie'seyeswentwidewithconcernasshewaitedforittopass.

Heclaimedhewasfinetoaccompanyus,andwhileIadmiredhisresolve,Ithoughthe'dbeputtinghimselfthroughalotjusttoshopwithabunchofteenagegirls.

Werodeoutthetwo-hourtriptoMissoulainalargeschoolvan,leavingjustafter sunrise.ManyMoroi lived separately fromhumans, butmany also livedamongthem,andwhenshoppingattheirmalls,youhadtogoduringtheirhours.The backwindows of the van had tinted glass to filter the light and keep theworstofitawayfromthevampires.

Wehadninepeople inourgroup:Lissa,Victor,Natalie,Camille,Dimitri,me,andthreeotherguardians.Twooftheguardians,BenandSpiridon,alwaystraveledwithVictor.Thethirdwasoneoftheschool'sguardians:Stan,thejerkwho'dhumiliatedmeonmyfirstdayback.

"CamilleandNataliedon'thavepersonalguardiansyet,"Dimitriexplainedtome."They'rebothundertheprotectionoftheirfamilies'guardians.SincetheyareAcademystudents leavingcampus,a schoolguardianaccompanies them—Stan. I go because I'm Lissa's assigned guardian.Most girls her agewouldn'thaveapersonalguardianyet,butcircumstancesmakeherunusual.”

IsatinthebackofthevanwithhimandSpiridon,sotheycoulddispenseguardianwisdomtomeaspartof the"trainingexercise."BenandStansatupfront,whiletheotherssatinthemiddle.LissaandVictortalkedtoeachotheralot,catchinguponnews.Camille,raisedtobepoliteamongolderroyals,smiledandnoddedalong.Natalie,ontheotherhand,lookedleftoutandkepttryingtoshiftherfather'sattentionfromLissa.Itdidn'twork.He'dapparentlylearnedtotuneoutherchatter.

I turned back toDimitri. "She's supposed to have two guardians. Princesandprincessesalwaysdo.”

Spiridon was Dimitri's age, with spiky blond hair and a more casualattitude.DespitehisGreekname,hehadaSoutherndrawl."Don'tworry,she'llhaveplentywhenthetimecomes.Dimitri'salreadyoneofthem.Oddsareyou'llbeonetoo.Andthat'swhyyou'reheretoday.”

"Thetrainingpart,"Iguessed."Yup.You'regoingtobeDimitri'spartner.”Amomentoffunnysilencefell,probablynotnoticeable toanyoneexcept

Dimitriandme.Oureyesmet."Guardingpartner,"Dimitriclarifiedunnecessarily, likemaybehe toohad

beenthinkingofotherkindsofpartners."Yup,"agreedSpiridon.Oblivious to the tensionaroundhim,hewenton toexplainhowguardian

pairs worked. It was standard stuff, straight frommy textbooks, but it meantmore now that I'd be doing it in the real world. Guardians were assigned toMoroi based on importance. Two was a common grouping, one I'd probablyworkinalotwithLissa.Oneguardianstayedclosetothetarget;theotherstoodbackandkeptaneyeonthesurroundings.

Boringly,thoseholdingthesepositionswerecallednearandfarguards."You'll probably always be near guard," Dimitri toldme. "You're female

andthesameageastheprincess.Youcanstayclosetoherwithoutattractinganyattention.”

"AndIcan'tevertakemyeyesoffher,"Inoted."Oryou.”Spiridon laughed again and elbowed Dimitri. "You've got a star student

there.Didyougiveherastake?”"No.She'snotready.”"Iwouldbeif

someonewouldshowmehowtouseone,"Iargued.Ikneweveryguardianinthevanhadastakeandagunconcealedonhim.

"Moretoitthanjustusingthestake,"saidDimitriinhisold-and-wiseway."You'vestillgottosubduethem.Andyou'vegottobringyourselftokillthem.”

"Whywouldn'tIkillthem?”"MostStrigoiused tobeMoroiwhopurposely turned.Sometimes they're

Moroiordhampirsturnedbyforce.Itdoesn'tmatter.There'sastrongchanceyoumightknowoneofthem.Couldyoukillsomeoneyouusedtoknow?”

Thistripwasgettinglessfunbytheminute."Iguessso.I'dhaveto,right?Ifit'sthemorLissa…”"Youmightstillhesitate,"saidDimitri."Andthathesitationcouldkillyou.

Andher.”"Thenhowdoyoumakesureyoudon'thesitate?”"You have to keep telling yourself that they aren't the same people you

knew.They'vebecome somethingdark and twisted.Somethingunnatural.Youhavetoletgoofattachmentsanddowhat'sright.Iftheyhaveanygrainoftheirformerselvesleft,they'llprobablybegrateful.”

"Gratefulformekillingthem?”"IfsomeoneturnedyouintoaStrigoi,whatwouldyouwant?"heasked.Ididn'tknowhowtoanswerthat,soIsaidnothing.Nevertakinghiseyes

offme,hekeptpushing."Whatwouldyouwantifyouknewyouweregoingtobeconvertedintoa

Strigoi against your will? If you knew you would lose all sense of your oldmoralsandunderstandingofwhat'srightandwrong?Ifyouknewyou'dlivetherestofyourlife—yourimmortallife—killinginnocentpeople?Whatwouldyouwant?”

Thevanhadgrownuncomfortably silent.StaringatDimitri, burdenedbyallthosequestions,IsuddenlyunderstoodwhyheandIhadthisweirdattraction,goodlooksaside.

I'd never met anyone else who took being a guardian so seriously, whounderstandallthelife-and-deathconsequences.Certainlynoonemyagedidyet;Masonhadn'tbeenabletounderstandwhyIcouldn'trelaxanddrinkattheparty.DimitrihadsaidIgraspedmydutybetterthanmanyolderguardians,andIdidn'tget why—especially when they would have seen so much more death anddanger.ButIknewinthatmomentthathewasright,thatIhadsomeweirdsenseofhowlifeanddeathandgoodandevilworkedwitheachother.

Sodidhe.Wemightgetlonelysometimes.Wemighthavetoputour"fun"onhold.Wemightnotbeabletolivetheliveswewantedforourselves.Butthatwas theway it had to be.We understood each other, understood that we had

otherstoprotect.Ourliveswouldneverbeeasy.Andmakingdecisionslikethisonewaspartofthat."IfIbecameStrigoi…I'dwantsomeonetokillme.""Sowould I,"he saidquietly. I could tell thathe'dhad the same flashof

realizationI'djusthad,thatsamesenseofconnectionbetweenus."ItremindsmeofMikhailhuntingSonya,"murmuredVictorthoughtfully."WhoareMikhailandSonya?"askedLissa.Victorlookedsurprised."Why,Ithoughtyouknew.SonyaKarp.”"SonyaKar…youmean,Ms.Karp?Whatabouther?"Shelookedbackand

forthbetweenmeandheruncle."She…becameStrigoi,"Isaid,notmeetingLissa'seyes."Bychoice.”I'd known Lissa would find out some day. It was the final piece ofMs.

Karp's saga, a secret I'd kept to myself. A secret that worried me constantly.Lissa'sfaceandbondregisteredcompleteanduttershock,growinginintensitywhensherealizedI'dknownandnevertold.

"ButIdon'tknowwhoMikhailis,"Iadded."MikhailTanner,"saidSpiridon."Oh.GuardianTanner.Hewasherebeforeweleft."Ifrowned."Whyishe

chasingMs.Karp?”"Tokillher,"saidDimitriflatly."Theywerelovers.”The entire Strigoi thing shifted into new focus for me. Running into a

StrigoiIknewduringtheheatofbattlewasonething.Purposelyhuntingdownsomeone…someone I'd loved.Well, Ididn'tknow if Icoulddo that,even if itwastechnicallytherightthing.

"Perhapsitistimetotalkaboutsomethingelse,"saidVictorgently."Todayisn'tadaytodwellondepressingtopics.”

Ithinkallofusfeltrelievedtogettothemall.Shiftingintomybodyguardrole,IstuckbyLissa'ssideaswewanderedfromstoretostore,lookingatallthenew styles that were out there. It was nice to be in public again and to dosomethingwithherthatwasjustfunanddidn'tinvolveanyofthedark,twistedpolitics of theAcademy. Itwas almost like old times. I'dmissed just hangingout.I'dmissedmybestfriend.

Although it was only just past mid-November, the mall already hadglitteringholidaydecorationsup.IdecidedIhadthebestjobever.Admittedly,IdidfeelalittleputoutwhenIrealizedtheolderguardiansgottostayincontactthrough cool little communication devices.When I protestedmy lack of one,Dimitri toldme I'd learnbetterwithoutone. If I couldhandleprotectingLissatheold-fashionedway,Icouldhandleanything.

Victor and Spiridon stayed with us while Dimitri and Ben fanned out,

somehowmanagingnottolooklikecreepystalkerguyswatchingteenagegirls."This is so you," said Lissa in Macy's, handing me a low-cut tank top

embellishedwithlace."I'llbuyitforyou.”I regarded it longingly, already picturing myself in it. Then, making my

regulareyecontactwithDimitri,Ishookmyheadandhandeditback."Winter'scoming.I'dgetcold.”

"Neverstoppedyoubefore.”Shrugging,shehungitbackup.SheandCamilletriedonanonstopstring

ofclothes,theirmassiveallowancesensuringthatpriceposednoproblem.Lissaoffered tobuymeanything Iwanted.We'dbeengenerouswitheachotherourwholelives,andIdidn'thesitatetotakeheruponit.Mychoicessurprisedher.

"You'vegot three thermal shirtsandahoodie," she informedme, flippingthroughastackofBCBGjeans."You'vegoneallboringonme.”

"Hey,Idon'tseeyoubuyingsluttytops.”"I'mnottheonewhowearsthem.”"Thanksalot.”"YouknowwhatImean.You'reevenwearingyourhairup.”Itwastrue.I'dtakenDimitri'sadviceandwrappedmyhairupinahighbun,

earningasmilewhenhe'dseenme.If I'dhadmolnijamarks, theywouldhaveshown.

Glancing around, she made sure none of the others could hear us. Thefeelingsinthebondshiftedtosomethingmoretroubled.

"YouknewaboutMs.Karp.”"Yeah.Iheardaboutitamonthorsoaftersheleft.”Lissa tossedapairofembroidered jeansoverherarm,not lookingatme.

"Whydidn'tyoutellme?”"Youdidn'tneedtoknow.”"Youdidn'tthinkIcouldhandleit?”I keptmy face perfectly blank.As I stared at her,mymindwas back in

time,backtotwoyearsago.I'dbeenondaytwoofmysuspensionforallegedlydestroyingWade'sroomwhenaroyalpartyvisitedtheschool.I'dbeenallowedtoattendthatreceptiontoobuthadbeenunderheavyguardtomakesureIdidn't"tryanything.”

Twoguardians escortedme to the commons and talkedquietlywith eachotheralongtheway.

"She killed the doctor attending her and nearly took out half the patientsandnursesonherwayout.”

"Dotheyhaveanyideawhereshewent?”"No,they'retrackingher…but,well,youknowhowitis.”

"Ineverexpectedhertodothis.Sheneverseemedlikethetype.”"Yeah,well,Sonyawascrazy.Didyouseehowviolentshewasgettingnear

theend?Shewascapableofanything.”I'dbeentrudgingalongmiserablyandjerkedmyheadup."Sonya?YoumeanMs.Karp?"Iasked."Shekilledsomebody?”Thetwoguardiansexchangedlooks.Finally,onesaidgravely,"Shebecame

aStrigoi,Rose.”Istoppedwalkingandstared."Ms.Karp?No…shewouldn'thave…”"I'm afraid so," the other one replied. "But…you should keep that to

yourself.It'satragedy.Don'tmakeitschoolgossip.”Iwentthroughtherestofthenightinadaze.Ms.Karp.CrazyKarp.She'd

killedsomeonetobecomeStrigoi.Icouldn'tbelieveit.Whenthereceptionended,I'dmanagedtosneakofffrommyguardiansand

steala fewpreciousmomentswithLissa.Thebondhadgrownstrongbynow,andIhadn'tneededtoseeherfacetoknowhowmiserableshewas.

"What's wrong?" I asked her. We were in a corner of the hallway, justoutsidethecommons.

Her eyes were blank. I could feel how she had a headache; its paintransferred to me. "I…I don't know. I just feel weird. I feel like I'm beingfollowed,likeIhavetobecareful,youknow?”

Ididn'tknowwhat to say. Ididn't think shewasbeing followed,butMs.Karpusedtosaythesamething.Alwaysparanoid."It'sprobablynothing,"Isaidlightly.

"Probably,"sheagreed.Hereyessuddenlynarrowed."ButWade isn't.Hewon't shut up about what happened. You can't believe the things he's sayingaboutyou.”

Icould,actuallybutIdidn'tcare."Forgetabouthim.He'snothing.”"Ihatehim,"shesaid.Hervoicewasuncharacteristicallysharp."I'monthe

committeewithhimforthatfund-raiser,andIhatehearinghimrunhisfatmoutheverydayandseeinghimflirtwithanythingfemalethatwalksby.Youshouldn'tbepunishedforwhathedid.Heneedstopay.”

Mymouthwentdry."It'sokay…Idon'tcare.Calmdown,Liss.”"Icare,"shesnapped, turningherangeronme."IwishtherewasawayI

could get back at him. Someway to hurt him like he hurt you." She put herhands behindher back andpacedback and forth furiously, her steps hard andpurposeful.

Thehatredandangerboiledwithinher. I could feel it in thebond. It feltlike a storm, and it scared the hell out of me.Wrapped around it all was anuncertainty, an instability that said Lissa didn't knowwhat to do but that she

wanted desperately to do something. Anything.Mymind flashed to the nightwiththebaseballbat.AndthenIthoughtaboutMs.Karp.ShebecameaStrigoi,Rose.

Itwas the scariestmoment ofmy life. Scarier than seeing her inWade'sroom. Scarier than seeing her heal that raven. Scarier thanmy capture by theguardianswould be. Because just then, I didn't knowmy best friend. I didn'tknowwhatshewascapableof.Ayearearlier,Iwouldhavelaughedatanyonewhosaidshe'dwanttogoStrigoi.Butayearearlier,Ialsowouldhavelaughedatanyonewhosaidshe'dwanttocutherwristsormakesomeone"pay.”

Inthatmoment,Isuddenlybelievedshemightdotheimpossible.AndIhadtomakesureshedidn't.Saveher.Saveherfromherself.

"We're leaving," I said, taking her arm and steering her down the hall."Rightnow.”

Confusionmomentarilyreplacedheranger."Whatdoyoumean?Youwanttogotothewoodsorsomething?”

Ididn'tanswer.Somethinginmyattitudeorwordsmusthavestartledher,because shedidn'tquestionmeas I ledusoutof thecommons, cuttingacrosscampus toward the parking lot where visitors came. It was filled with carsbelongingtotonight'sguests.OneofthemwasalargeLincolnTownCar,andIwatchedasitschauffeurstarteditup.

"Someone's leavingearly,"Isaid,peeringathimfromaroundaclusterofbushes. I glanced behind us and saw nothing. "They'll probably be here anyminute.”

Lissacaughton."Whenyousaid,'We'releaving,'youmeant…no.Rose,wecan'tleavetheAcademy.We'dnevergetthroughthewardsandcheckpoints.”

"Wedon'thaveto,"Isaidfirmly."Hedoes.”"Buthowdoesthathelpus?”Itookadeepbreath,regrettingwhatIhadtosaybutseeingitasthelesser

ofevils."YouknowhowyoumadeWadedothosethings?”Sheflinchedbutnodded."Ineedyoutodothesamething.Gouptothatguyandtellhimtohideus

inhistrunk.”Shock and fear poured out of her. She didn't understand, and she was

scared. Extremely scared. She'd been scared for weeks now, ever since thehealingandthemoodsandWade.Shewasfragileandontheedgeofsomethingneitherofusunderstood.Butthroughallofthat,shetrustedme.ShebelievedIwouldkeephersafe.

"Okay,"shesaid.Shetookafewstepstowardhim,thenlookedbackatme."Why?Whyarewedoingthis?”

IthoughtaboutLissa'sanger,herdesiretodoanythingtogetbackatWade.AndIthoughtaboutMs.Karp—pretty,unstableMs.Karp—goingStrigoi."I'mtakingcareofyou,"Isaid."Youdon'tneedtoknowanythingelse.”

AtthemallinMissoula,standingbetweenracksofdesignerclothes,Lissaaskedagain,"Whydidn'tyoutellme?”

"Youdidn'tneedtoknow,"Irepeated.She headed toward the dressing room, still whispering with me. "You're

worriedI'mgoingtoloseit.AreyouworriedI'llgoStrigoitoo?”"No.Noway.Thatwasallher.You'dneverdothat.”"EvenifIwascrazy?”"No," I said, trying tomakea joke. "You'd just shaveyourheadand live

withthirtycats.”Lissa'sfeelingsgrewdarker,butshedidn'tsayanythingelse.Stoppingjust

outsidethedressingroom,shepulledablackdressofftherack.Shebrightenedalittle.

"This is the dress you were born for. I don't care how practical you arenow.”

Made of silky black material, the dress was strapless and sleek, fallingabouttotheknees.Althoughithadaslightflairatthehemline,therestlookedlikeitwoulddefinitelymanagesomeseriousclingingaction.Supersexy.Maybeevenchallenge-the-school-dress-codesexy.

"Thatismydress,"Iadmitted.Ikeptstaringatit,wantingitsobadlythatitachedinmychest.Thiswasthekindofdressthatchangedtheworld.Thekindofdressthatstartedreligions.

Lissapulledoutmysize."Tryiton.”Ishookmyheadandstarted toput itback."Ican't. Itwouldcompromise

you.Onedressisn'tworthyourgrislydeath.”"Thenwe'lljustgetitwithoutyoutryingiton."Sheboughtthedress.The afternoon continued, and I found myself growing tired. Always

watchingandbeingonguardsuddenlybecamealotlessfun.Whenwehitourlaststop,ajewelrystore,Ifeltkindofglad.

"Hereyougo,"saidLissa,pointingatoneofthecases."Thenecklacemadetogowithyourdress.”

I looked. A thin gold chain with a gold-and-diamond rose pendant.Emphasisonthediamondpart.

"Ihaterosestuff.”Lissahadalways lovedgettingmerose things—just toseemyreaction, I

think.Whenshesawthenecklace'sprice,hersmilefellaway."Oh,lookatthat.Evenyouhavelimits,"Iteased."Yourcrazyspendingis

stoppedatlast.”Wewaited forVictor andNatalie to finishup.Hewas apparently buying

her something, and she looked like shemight growwings and fly awaywithhappiness. I was glad. She'd been dying for his attention. Hopefully he wasbuyinghersomethingextra-expensivetomakeupforit.

We rode home in tired silence, our sleep schedules allmessed up by thedaylighttrip.SittingnexttoDimitri,Ileanedbackagainsttheseatandyawned,very aware that our arms were touching. That feeling of closeness andconnectionburnedbetweenus.

"So,Ican'tevertryonclothesagain?"Iaskedquietlynotwantingtowakeup the others. Victor and the guardians were awake, but the girls had fallenasleep.

"Whenyouaren'tonduty,youcan.Youcandoitduringyourtimeoff.”"Idon'teverwanttimeoff.IwanttoalwaystakecareofLissa."Iyawned

again."Didyouseethatdress?”"Isawthedress.”"Didyoulikeit?”Hedidn'tanswer.Itookthatasayes."AmIgoingtoendangermyreputationifIwearittothedance?”Whenhespoke,Icouldbarelyhearhim."You'llendangertheschool.”Ismiledandfellasleep.WhenIwokeup,myheadrestedagainsthisshoulder.Thatlongcoatofhis

—theduster—coveredmelikeablanket.Thevanhadstopped;wewerebackatschool.Ipulledthedusteroffandclimbedoutafterhim,suddenlyfeelingwideawakeandhappy.Toobadmyfreedomwasabouttoend.

"Back to prison," I sighed, walking beside Lissa toward the commons."Maybeifyoufakeaheartattack,Icanmakeabreakforit.”

"Without your clothes?" She handed me a bag, and I swung it aroundhappily."Ican'twaittoseethedress.”

"Me either. If they let me go. Kirova's still deciding if I've been goodenough.”

"Showherthoseboringshirtsyoubought.She'llgointoacoma.I'maboutreadyto.”

Ilaughedandhoppedupontooneofthewoodenbenches,pacingherasIwalkedalongit.IjumpedbackdownwhenIreachedtheend."Theyaren'tthatboring.”

"Idon'tknowwhattothinkofthisnew,responsibleRose.”Ihoppedupontoanotherbench."I'mnotthatresponsible.”"Hey," called Spiridon. He and the rest of the group trailed behind us.

"You'restillonduty.Nofunallowedupthere.”"Nofunhere,"Icalledback,hearingthelaughterinhisvoice."Iswear—

shit.”Iwasuponathirdbench,neartheendofit.Mymusclestensed,readyto

jumpbackdown.OnlywhenItriedto,myfootdidn'tgowithme.Thewood,atonemomentseeminglyhardandsolid,gavewaybeneathme,almostasthoughmadeofpaper.Itdisintegrated.Myfootwentthrough,myanklegettingcaughtintheholewhiletherestofmybodytriedtogoinanotherdirection.Thebenchheldme,swingingmybodytothegroundwhilestillseizingmyfoot.Myanklebent in an unnatural direction. I crashed down. I heard a cracking sound thatwasn'tthewood.Theworstpainofmylifeshotthroughmybody.

AndthenIblackedout.

EighteenIWOKEUPSTARINGATtheboringwhiteceilingoftheclinic.Afiltered

light—soothing toMoroi patients—shone down onme. I felt strange, kind ofdisoriented,butIdidn'thurt.

"Rose.”Thevoicewaslikesilkonmyskin.Gentle.Rich.Turningmyhead,Imet

Dimitri'sdarkeyes.HesatinachairbesidethebedIlayon,hisshoulder-lengthbrownhairhangingforwardandframinghisface.

"Hey,"Isaid,myvoicecomingoutasacroak."Howdoyoufeel?”"Weird.Kindofgroggy.”"Dr. Olendzki gave you something for the pain—you seemed pretty bad

whenwebroughtyouin.”"Idon'trememberthat…HowlonghaveIbeenout?”"Afewhours.”"Must have been strong.Must still be strong." Some of the details came

back.Thebench.Myanklegettingcaught.Icouldn'tremembermuchafterthat.Feelinghotandcoldandthenhotagain.Tentatively,Itriedmovingthetoesonmyhealthyfoot."Idon'thurtatall.”

Heshookhishead."No.Becauseyouweren'tseriouslyinjured.”The sound of my ankle cracking came back to me. "Are you sure? I

remember…thewayitbent.No.Somethingmustbebroken."Imanagetositup,soIcouldlookatmyankle.

"Oratleastsprained.”Hemovedforward tostopme."Becareful.Youranklemightbefine,but

you'reprobablystillalittleoutofit.”Icarefullyshiftedtotheedgeofthebedandlookeddown.Myjeanswere

rolledup.Theanklelookedalittlered,butIhadnobruisesorseriousmarks."God,Igotlucky.IfI'dhurtit, itwouldhaveputmeoutofpracticefora

while.”Smiling,hereturnedtohischair."Iknow.YoukepttellingmethatwhileI

wascarryingyou.Youwereveryupset.”"You…youcarriedmehere?”"Afterwebrokethebenchapartandfreedyourfoot.”Man.I'dmissedoutonalot.TheonlythingbetterthanimaginingDimitri

carryingme in his armswas imagininghim shirtlesswhile carryingme in hisarms.

Thentherealityofthesituationhitme."Iwastakendownbyabench,"Igroaned.

"What?”"IsurvivedthewholedayguardingLissa,andyouguyssaidIdidagood

job.Then,Igetbackhereandmeetmydownfallintheformofabench."Ugh."Doyouknowhowembarrassingitis?Andallthoseguyssaw,too.”

"Itwasn'tyourfault,"hesaid."Nooneknewthebenchwasrotted.Itlookedfine.”

"Still. I should have just stuck to the sidewalk like a normal person.TheothernovicesaregoingtogivemeshitwhenIgetback.”

Hislipsheldbackasmile."Maybepresentswillcheeryouup.”Isatupstraighter."Presents?”Thesmileescaped,andhehandedmeasmallboxwithapieceofpaper."ThisisfromPrinceVictor.”SurprisedthatVictorwouldhavegivenmeanything,Ireadthenote.Itwas

justafewlines,hastilyscrawledinpen.

Rose—I'mveryhappytoseeyoudidn'tsufferanyseriousinjuriesfromyourfall.

Truly,itisamiracle.Youleadacharmedlife,andVasilisaisluckytohaveyou.

"That'sniceofhim,"Isaid,openingthebox.ThenIsawwhatwasinside."Whoa.Verynice.”

Itwas therosenecklace, theoneLissahadwanted togetmebutcouldn'tafford. Iheld itup, looping itschainovermyhandso theglittering,diamond-coveredrosehungfree.

"Thisisprettyextremeforaget-wellpresent,"Inoted,recallingtheprice."Heactuallyboughtitinhonorofyoudoingsowellonyourfirstdayasan

officialguardian.HesawyouandLissalookingatit.”"Wow."ItwasallIcouldsay."Idon'tthinkIdidthatgoodofajob.”"Ido.”Grinning,Iplacedthenecklacebackintheboxandsetitonanearbytable.

"Youdidsay'presents,'right?Likemorethanone?”Helaughedoutright,andthesoundwrappedaroundmelikeacaress.God,I

lovedthesoundofhislaugh."Thisisfromme.”Hehandedmeasmall,plainbag.Puzzledandexcited,Iopeneditup.Lip

gloss, the kind I liked. I'd complained to him a number of times how I wasrunningout,butI'dneverthoughthewaspayingattention.

"How'dyoumanagetobuythis?Isawyouthewholetimeatthemall.”"Guardiansecrets.”

"What'sthisfor?Formyfirstday?”"No,"hesaidsimply."BecauseIthoughtitwouldmakeyouhappy.”Withouteventhinkingabout it, I leanedforwardandhuggedhim."Thank

you.”Judging from his stiff posture, I'd clearly caught him by surprise. And

yeah…I'dactuallycaughtmyselfbysurprise,too.Butherelaxedafewmomentslater, andwhen he reached around and rested his hands onmy lower back, IthoughtIwasgoingtodie.

"I'mgladyou'rebetter,"hesaid.Hismouthsounded like itwasalmost inmyhair,justabovemyear."WhenIsawyoufall…”

"Youthought,'Wow,she'saloser.'“"That'snotwhatIthought.”He pulled back slightly, so he could see me better, but we didn't say

anything.HiseyesweresodarkanddeepthatIwantedtodiverightin.Staringat them made me feel warm all over, like they had flames inside. Slowly,carefully, those long fingers of his reached out and traced the edge of mycheekbone,movingupthesideofmyface.Atthefirsttouchofhisskinonmine,Ishivered.Hewoundalockofmyhairaroundonefinger,justlikehehadinthegym.

Swallowing, I draggedmy eyes up from his lips. I'd been contemplatingwhatit'dbeliketokisshim.Thethoughtbothexcitedandscaredme,whichwasstupid. I'd kissed a lot of guys and never thought much about it. No reasonanotherone—evenanolderone—shouldbethatbigofadeal.Yetthethoughtofhim closing the distance and bringing his lips to mine made the world startspinning.

Asoftknocksoundedat thedoor,andIhastily leanedback.Dr.Olendzkistuckherheadin."IthoughtIheardyoutalking.Howdoyoufeel?”

Shewalkedover andmademe liebackdown.Touchingandbendingmyankle,sheassesseditfordamageandfinallyshookherheadwhenfinished.

"You'relucky.Withallthenoiseyoumadecominginhere,Ithoughtyourfoothadbeenamputated.Musthavejustbeenshock."Shesteppedback."I'dfeelbetterifyousatoutfromyournormaltrainingstomorrow,butotherwise,you'regoodtogo.”

I breathed a sigh of relief. I didn't remember my hysteria— and wasactually kind of embarrassed that I'd thrown such a fit—but I had been rightabout the problems this would have causedme if I'd broken or sprained it. Icouldn'taffordtoloseanytimehere;Ineededtotakemytrialsandgraduateinthespring.

Dr.Olendzkigavemetheokaytogoandthenlefttheroom.Dimitriwalked

overtoanotherchairandbroughtmemyshoesandcoat.Lookingathim,Ifeltawarm flush sweepme as I recalledwhat had happened before the doctor hadentered.

HewatchedasIslippedoneoftheshoeson."Youhaveaguardianangel.”"I don't believe in angels," I told him. "I believe in what I can do for

myself.”"Well then, you have an amazing body." I glanced up at him with a

questioninglook."Forhealing,Imean.Iheardabouttheaccident….”Hedidn't specifywhichaccident itwas,but itcouldbeonlyone.Talking

aboutitnormallybotheredme,butwithhim,IfeltIcouldsayanything."EveryonesaidIshouldn'thavesurvived,"Iexplained."BecauseofwhereI

satandthewaythecarhitthetree.Lissawasreallytheonlyoneinasecurespot.SheandIwalkedawaywithonlyafewscratches.”

"Andyoudon'tbelieveinangelsormiracles.”"Nope.I—”Truly,itisamiracle.Youleadacharmedlife….And just like that, a million thoughts came slamming into my head.

Maybe…maybeIhadaguardianangelafterall…Dimitriimmediatelynoticedtheshiftinmyfeelings."What'swrong?”Reachingoutwithmymind, I tried toexpand thebondandshakeoff the

lingering effects of the pain medication. Somemore of Lissa's feelings camethroughtome.Anxious.Upset.

"Where'sLissa?Wasshehere?”"Idon'tknowwhere she is.Shewouldn't leaveyour sidewhile Ibrought

you in. She stayed right next the bed, right up until the doctor came in. Youcalmeddownwhenshesatnexttoyou.”

IclosedmyeyesandfeltlikeImightfaint.IhadcalmeddownwhenLissasatnexttomebecauseshe'dtakenthepainaway.She'dhealedme….

Justasshehadthenightoftheaccident.It all made sense now. I shouldn't have survived. Everyone had said so.

WhoknewwhatkindofinjuriesI'dactuallysuffered?Internalbleeding.Brokenbones.Itdidn'tmatterbecauseLissahadfixedit,justlikeshe'dfixedeverythingelse.Thatwaswhyshe'dbeenleaningovermewhenIwokeup.

It was also probably why she'd passed out when they took her to thehospital. She'd been exhausted for days afterward. And that was when herdepression had begun. It had seemed like a normal reaction after losing herfamily,butnowIwonderediftherewasmoretoit, ifhealingmehadplayedarole.

Openingmymindagain,Ireachedouttoher,needingtofindher.Ifshe'd

healedme,therewasnotellingwhatshapeshecouldbeinnow.Hermoodsandmagicwerelinked,andthishadbeenaprettyintenseshowofmagic.

Thedrugwas almostgone frommy system, and like that, I snapped intoher.Itwasalmosteasynow.Atidalwaveofemotionshitme,worsethanwhenhernightmaresengulfedme.I'dneverfeltsuchintensityfromherbefore.

Shesatinthechapel'sattic,crying.Shedidn'tentirelyknowwhyshewascryingeither.ShefelthappyandrelievedthatI'dbeenunharmed,thatshe'dbeenable to healme.At the same time, she feltweak in bothbody andmind.Sheburned inside, like she'd lost part of herself. Sheworried I'd bemad becauseshe'dusedherpowers.Shedreadedgoingthroughanotherschooldaytomorrow,pretendingshelikedbeingwithacrowdwhohadnootherinterestsasidefromspending their families'moneyandmakingfunof those lessbeautifuland lesspopular.Shedidn'twanttogotothedancewithAaronandseehimwatchhersoadoringly—andfeelhimtouchingher—whenshefeltonlyfriendshipforhim.

Mostofthesewereallnormalconcerns,buttheyhitherhard,harderthanthey would an ordinary person, I thought. She couldn't sort through them orfigureouthowtofixthem.

"Youokay?”She lookedup andbrushed thehair away fromwhere it stuck toherwet

cheeks.Christian stood in theentrance to theattic.Shehadn't evenheardhimcomeupthestairs.She'dbeentoolostinherowngrief.Aflickerofbothlongingandangersparkedwithinher.

"I'm fine," she snapped.Sniffling, she tried to stopher tears,notwantinghimtoseeherweak.

Leaning against the wall, he crossed his arms and wore an unreadableexpression."Do…doyouwanttotalk?”

"Oh..."Shelaughedharshly."Youwanttotalknow?AfterItriedsomanytimes—”

"Ididn'twantthat!ThatwasRose—”HecuthimselfoffandIflinched.Iwastotallybusted.Lissastoodupandstrodetowardhim."WhataboutRose?”"Nothing."Hismaskofindifferenceslippedbackintoplace."Forgetit.”"WhataboutRose?"Shesteppedcloser.Even throughheranger, she still

feltthatinexplicableattractiontohim.Andthensheunderstood."Shemadeyou,didn'tshe?Shetoldyoutostoptalkingtome?”

He stared stonily ahead. "Itwas probably for the best. Iwould have justmessedthingsupforyou.Youwouldn'tbewhereyouarenow.”

"What'sthatsupposedtomean?”"What do you think itmeans?God. People live or die at your command

now,YourHighness.”"You'rebeingkindofmelodramatic.”"Am I?All day, I hear people talking aboutwhat you're doing andwhat

you'rethinkingandwhatyou'rewearing.Whetheryou'llapprove.Whoyoulike.Whoyouhate.They'reyourpuppets.”

"It'snotlikethat.Besides,Ihadtodoit.TogetbackatMia…”Rolling his eyes, he looked away from her. "You don't even knowwhat

you'regettingbackatherfor.”Lissa's anger flared. "She set up Jesse andRalf to say those things about

Rose!Icouldn'tlethergetawaywiththat.”"Roseistough.Shewouldhavegottenoverit.”"Youdidn'tseeher,"sherepliedobstinately."Shewascrying.”"So?Peoplecry.You'recrying.”"NotRose.”He turned back to her, a dark smile curling his lips. "I've never seen

anything like you two.Always soworried about each other. I get her thing—somekindofweirdguardianhang-up—butyou'rejustthesame.”

"She'smyfriend.”"I guess it's that simple. I wouldn't know." He sighed, momentarily

thoughtful, then snapped back to sarcastic mode. "Anyway. Mia. So you gotbackatheroverwhatshedidtoRose.Butyou'remissingthepoint.Whydidshedoit?”

Lissafrowned."BecauseshewasjealousaboutmeandAaron—”"Moretoitthanthat,Princess.Whatdidshehavetobejealousabout?She

already had him. She didn't need to attack you to drive that home. She couldhavejustmadeabigshowofbeingalloverhim.Sortoflikeyouarenow,"headdedwryly.

"Okay.Whatelseisthere,then?Whydidshewanttoruinmylife?Ineverdidanythingtoher—beforeallthis,Imean.”

Heleanedforward,crystal-blueeyesboringintohers."You'reright.Youdidn't—butyourbrotherdid.”Lissapulledawayfromhim."Youdon'tknowanythingaboutmybrother.”"IknowhescrewedMiaover.Literally.”"Stopit,stoplying.”"I'mnot.Swear toGodorwhoeverelseyouwant tobelieve in. Iused to

talk to Mia now and then, back when she was a freshman. She wasn't verypopular,butshewassmart.Stillis.Sheusedtoworkonalotofcommitteeswithroyals— dances and stuff. I don't know all of it. But she got to know yourbrotherononeofthose,andtheysortofgottogether.”

"Theydidnot.Iwouldhaveknown.Andrewouldhavetoldme.”"Nope.Hedidn'ttellanyone.Hetoldhernottoeither.Heconvincedherit

shouldbesomekindofromanticsecretwhenreally,he justdidn'twantanyofhisfriendstofindouthewasgettingnakedwithanon-royalfreshman.”

"IfMiatoldyouthat,shewasmakingitup,"exclaimedLissa."Yeah,well,Idon'tthinkshewasmakingitupwhenIsawhercrying.He

gottiredofherafterafewweeksanddumpedher.Toldhershewastooyoungand that he couldn't really get seriouswith someonewhowasn't from a goodfamily.FromwhatIunderstand,hewasn'tevenniceaboutiteither—didn'tevenbotherwiththe'let'sbefriends'stuff.”

LissapushedherselfintoChristian'sface."Youdidn'tevenknowAndre!Hewouldneverhavedonethat.”

"Youdidn'tknowhim.I'msurehewasnicetohisbabysister;I'msurehelovedyou.Butinschool,withhisfriends,hewasjustasmuchofajerkastherestoftheroyals.IsawhimbecauseIseeeverything.Easywhennoonenoticesyou.”

Sheheldbackasob,unsurewhethertobelievehimornot."SothisiswhyMiahatesme?”

"Yup. She hates you because of him. That, and because you're royal andshe'sinsecurearoundallroyals,whichiswhysheworkedsohardtoclawuptheranksandbetheirfriend.Ithinkit'sacoincidencethatsheendedupwithyourex-boyfriend,butnow thatyou'reback, thatprobablymade itworse.Betweenstealing him and spreading those stories about her parents, you guys reallypickedthebestwaystomakehersuffer.Nicework.”

Thesmallestpangofguiltlurchedinsideofher."Istillthinkyou'relying.”"I'malotofthings,butI'mnotaliar.That'syourdepartment.AndRose's.”"Wedon't—”"Exaggeratestoriesaboutpeople'sfamilies?Saythatyouhateme?Pretend

tobefriendswithpeopleyouthinkarestupid?Dateaguyyoudon'tlike?”"Ilikehim.”"Likeorlike?”"Oh,there'sadifference?”"Yes.Like is when you date a big, blondmoron and laugh at his stupid

jokes.”Then,outofnowhere,heleanedforwardandkissedher.Itwashotandfast

and furious, an outpouring of the rage and passion and longing that Christianalwayskeptlockedinsideofhim.Lissahadneverbeenkissedlikethat,andIfelther respond to it, respond tohim—howhemade her feel somuchmore alivethanAaronoranyoneelsecould.

Christianpulledbackfromthekissbutstillkepthisfacenexttohers."That'swhatyoudowithsomeoneyoulike.”Lissa'sheartpoundedwithbothangeranddesire."Well,Idon'tlikeorlike

you.AndI thinkyouandMiaareboth lyingaboutAndre.Aaronwouldnevermakeupanythinglikethat.”

"That's because Aaron doesn't say anything that requires words of morethanonesyllable.”

Shepulledaway."Getout.Getawayfromme.”Helookedaroundcomically."Youcan'tthrowmeout.Webothsignedthe

lease.”"Get.Out!"sheyelled."Ihateyou!”Hebowed."Anythingyouwant,YourHighness."Withafinaldarklook,he

lefttheattic.Lissa sank to her knees, letting out the tears she'd held back fromhim. I

couldbarelymakesenseoutofallthethingshurtingher.Godonlyknewthingsupsetme—like the Jesse incident—but theydidn't attackme in the sameway.They swirledwithin her, beating at her brain. The stories about Andre.Mia'shate.Christian'skiss.Healingme.This,Irealized,waswhatrealdepressionfeltlike.Whatmadnessfeltlike.

Overcome, drowning in her own pain, Lissamade the only decision shecould.Theonlythingshecoulddotochannelalloftheseemotions.Sheopenedupherpurseandfoundthetinyrazorbladeshealwayscarried….

Sickened,yetunable tobreakaway, I feltasshecuther leftarm,makingperfectly evenmarks,watching as the blood flowed across herwhite skin.Asalways,sheavoidedveins,buthercutsweredeeperthistime.Thecuttingstunghorribly, yet in doing it, she was able to focus on the physical pain, distractherselffromthementalanguishsothatshecouldfeellikeshewasincontrol.

Drops of blood splattered onto the dusty floor, and her world beganspinning.Seeingherownbloodintriguedher.Shehadtakenbloodfromothersherentire life.Me.Thefeeders.Now,here itwas, leakingout.Withanervousgiggle,shedecideditwasfunny.Maybebylettingitout,shewasgivingitbackto those she'd stolen it from.Ormaybeshewaswasting it,wasting the sacredDragomirbloodthateveryoneobsessedover.

I'dforcedmywayintoherhead,andnowIcouldn'tgetout.Heremotionshad ensnared me now—they were too strong and too powerful. But I had toescape—Iknewitwitheveryounceofmybeing.Ihadtostopher.Shewastooweakfromthehealingtolosethismuchblood.Itwastimetotellsomeone.

Breakingoutatlast,Ifoundmyselfbackintheclinic.Dimitri'shandswereonme,gentlyshakingmeashesaidmynameoverandoverinanefforttoget

myattention.Dr.Olendzkistoodbesidehim,facedarkandconcerned.IstaredatDimitri,trulyseeinghowmuchheworriedandcaredaboutme.

Christian had toldme to get help, to go to someone I trusted about Lissa. I'dignored the advice because I didn't trust anyone except her. But looking atDimitri now, feeling that sense of understandingwe shared, I knew that I didtrustsomeoneelse.

IfeltmyvoicecrackasIspoke."Iknowwheresheis.Lissa.Wehavetohelpher."

Nineteen

IT'SHARDTOSAYWHATfinallymademedoit.I'dheldontosomanysecrets for so long,doingwhat IbelievedbestprotectedLissa.Buthidinghercutting did nothing to protect her. I hadn't been able to make her stop—andreally, I nowwondered if itwasmy fault she'd ever started.Noneof this hadhappened until she healed me in the accident.What if she'd left me injured?MaybeIwouldhaverecovered.Maybeshewouldbeallrighttoday.

IstayedintheclinicwhileDimitriwenttogetAlberta.Hehadn'thesitatedforasecondwhenItoldhimwhereshewas.I'dsaidshewasindanger,andhe'dleftimmediately.

Everythingafterthatmovedlikesomesortofslow-motionnightmare.Theminutes dragged on while I waited. When he finally returned with anunconsciousLissa,aflurryaroseattheclinic,oneeveryonewantedmekeptoutof.Shehadlostalotofblood,andwhiletheyhadafeederonhandrightaway,rousinghertoenoughconsciousnesstodrinkproveddifficult.Itwasn'tuntilthemiddleoftheAcademy'snightthatsomeonedecidedshewasstableenoughformetovisit.

"Is it true?" she askedwhen Iwalked into the room.She layon thebed,wristsheavilybandaged.Iknewthey'dputalotofbloodbackintoher,butshestilllookedpaletome."Theysaiditwasyou.Youtoldthem.”

"Ihadto,"Isaid,afraidtogettooclose."Liss…youcutyourselfworsethanyoueverhave.Andafterhealingme…andtheneverythingwithChristian…youcouldn'thandleit.Youneededhelp.”

She closed her eyes. "Christian.Youknowabout that.Of course youdo.Youknowabouteverything.”

"I'msorry.Ijustwantedtohelp.”"WhathappenedtowhatMs.Karpsaid?Aboutkeepingitallsecret?”"Shewastalkingabouttheotherstuff.Idon'tthinkshe'dwantyoutokeep

cuttingyourself.”"Didyoutellthemaboutthe'otherstuff'?”Ishookmyhead."Notyet.”Sheturnedtowardme,eyescold."'Yet.'Butyou'regoingto.”"Ihaveto.Youcanhealotherpeople…butit'skillingyou.”"Ihealedyou.”"Iwouldhavebeenokayeventually.Theanklewouldhavehealed.It'snot

worthwhat itdoes toyou.And I think Iknowhow it started…whenyou firsthealedme….”

Iexplainedmyrevelationabouttheaccidentandhowallofherpowersand

depressionhad started after that. I also pointedout howour bondhad formedaftertheaccidenttoo,thoughIdidn'tfullyunderstandwhyyet.

"Idon'tknowwhat'sgoingon,but this isbeyondus.Weneed someone'shelp.”

"They'lltakemeaway,"shesaidflatly."LikeMs.Karp.”"Ithinkthey'lltrytohelpyou.Theywereallreallyworried.Liss,I'mdoing

thisforyou.Ijustwantyoutobeokay.”Sheturnedawayfromme."Getout,Rose.”Idid.They released her the next morning on the condition that she'd have to

comebackfordailyvisitstothecounselor.Dimitritoldmetheyalsoplannedonputtingheronsomesortofmedicationtohelpwiththedepression.Iwasn'tabigfanofpills,butI'dcheeronanythingthatwouldhelpher.

Unfortunately,somesophomorehadbeenintheclinicforanasthmaattack.He'dseenhercomeinwithDimitriandAlberta.Hedidn'tknowwhyshe'dbeenadmitted,but thathadn't stoppedhim from tellingpeople inhishallwhathe'dseen.Theythentoldothersatbreakfast.Bylunch,all theupperclassmenknewaboutthelate-nightclinicvisit.

Andmoreimportantly,everyoneknewshewasn'tspeakingtome.Just like that, whatever social headway I'd made plummeted. She didn't

outright condemn me, but her silence spoke legions, and people behavedaccordingly.

Thewholeday,IwalkedaroundtheAcademylikeaghost.Peoplewatchedandoccasionallyspoke tome,butfewmademuchmoreeffort than that.TheyfollowedLissa's lead, imitatingher silence.Noonewasopenlymean tome—theyprobablydidn'twant torisk it incasesheandIpatched thingsup.Still, Iheard"bloodwhore"whisperedhereandtherewhensomeonethoughtIwasn'tlistening.

Masonwouldhavewelcomedmetohislunchtable,butsomeofhisfriendsmightnothavebeensonice.Ididn'twanttobethecauseofanyfightsbetweenhimandthem.SoIchoseNatalieinstead.

"IheardLissatriedtorunawayagain,andyoustoppedher,"Nataliesaid.Noonehadacluewhyshe'dbeenintheclinicyet.Ihopeditstayedthatway.

Runningaway?Whereintheworldhadthatcomefrom?"Whywouldshedothat?”

"Idon't know."She loweredhervoice. "Why'd she leavebefore? It's justwhatIheard.”

Thatstoryragedonasthedaypassed,asdidallsortsofrumorsaboutwhyLissamighthavegonetothemedclinic.Pregnancyandabortiontheorieswere

eternally popular. Somewhispered shemight have gottenVictor's disease.Nooneevencameclosetoguessingthetruth.

Leavingour last class asquickly aspossible, Iwas astonishedwhenMiastartedwalkingtowardme.

"Whatdoyouwant?"Idemanded."Ican'tcomeoutandplay today, littlegirl.”

"Yousurehaveanattitudeforsomeonewhodoesn'texistrightnow.”"Asopposedtoyou?"Iasked.RememberingwhatChristianhadsaid,Idid

feelalittlesorryforher.ThatguiltdisappearedafterItookonelookatherface.Shemight havebeen avictim,but now shewas amonster.Therewas a cold,cunning look about her, very different from the desperate and depressed onefromtheotherday.Shehadn'tstayedbeatenafterwhatAndrehaddonetoher—ifthatwaseventrue,andIbelieveditwas—andIdoubtedshewouldwithLissaeither.Miawasasurvivor.

"Shegotridofyou,andyou'retoohighandmightytoadmitit."Herblueeyespracticallybuggedout."Don'tyouwanttogetbackather?”

"Areyoumorepsychothanusual?She'smybestfriend.Andwhyareyoustillfollowingme?”

Miatsked."Shedoesn'tactlikeit.Comeon,tellmewhathappenedattheclinic.It'ssomethingbig, isn't it?Shereallyispregnant,right?Tellmewhat itis.”

"Goaway.”"Ifyoutellme,I'llgetJesseandRalftosaytheymadeallthatstuffup.”Istoppedwalkingandspunaroundtofaceher.Scared,shetookafewsteps

backward.Shemusthaverecalledsomeofmypastthreatsofphysicalviolence."Ialreadyknowtheymadeitallup,becauseIdidn'tdoanyofit.Andifyou

trytoturnmeagainstLissaonemoretime,thestoriesaregoingtobeaboutyoubleeding,becauseI'llhaverippedyourthroatout!”

My voice grew louder with each word until I practically shouted. Miasteppedbackfurther,clearlyterrified.

"You really are crazy. No wonder she dropped you." She shrugged."Whatever.I'llfindoutwhat'sgoingonwithoutyou."

Whenthedancecamethatweekend,IdecidedIreallydidn'twanttogo.Ithad sounded stupid tobeginwith, and I'donlybeen interested ingoing to theafter-parties anyway. But without Lissa, I wasn't likely to gain admission tothose. Instead, I holed up in my room, trying—and failing—to do somehomework. Through the bond, I felt all sorts of mixed emotions from her,

particularlyanxietyandexcitement.Ithadtobehardhangingoutallnightwithaguyyoudidn'treallylike.

About tenminutes after the dance's start time, I decided to clean up andtake a shower.When I came back down the hall from the bathroom, a towelwrapped aroundmy head, I sawMason standing outsidemy door. He wasn'texactlydressedup,buthealsowasn'twearingjeans.Itwasastart.

"Thereyouare,partygirl.Iwasaboutreadytogiveup.”"Didyoustartanotherfire?Noguysallowedinthishall.”"Whatever.Likethatmakesadifference."True.Theschoolmightbeableto

keepStrigoiout,buttheydidahorriblejobatkeepingtherestofusawayfromeachother."Letmein.You'vegottogetready.”

Ittookmeaminutetorealizewhathemeant."No.I'mnotgoing.”"Comeon,"heprodded,followingmeinside."'Causeyouhadafightwith

Lissa?Youguysaregoingtomakeupsoon.Noreasonforyoutostayhereallnight.Ifyoudon'twanttobearoundher,Eddie'sgettingagrouptogetheroverinhisroomlater.”

Myold,fun-lovingspiritperkeditsheadupjustabit.NoLissa.Probablynoroyals."Yeah?”

Seeingthathewasstartingtogetme,Masongrinned.Lookingathiseyes,Irealizedagainhowmuchhelikedme.AndagainIwondered,Whycouldn'tIjusthaveanormalboyfriend?WhydidIwantmyhot,oldermentor—thementorI'dprobablyendupgettingfired?

"It'll justbenovices,"Masoncontinued,oblivious tomythoughts."AndIhaveasurpriseforyouwhenwegetthere.”

"Is it in abottle?" IfLissawanted to ignoreme, I hadno reason tokeepmyselfsober.

"No,that'satEddie's.Hurryupandgetdressed.Iknowyouaren'twearingthat.”

IlookeddownatmyrippedjeansandUniversityofOregonT-shirt.Yeah.Definitelynotwearingthis.

Fifteenminutes later,we cut across the quad back over to the commons,laughingaswerecountedhowaparticularlyclumsyclassmateofourshadgivenhimself a black eye in practice this week. Moving quickly over the frozenground wasn't easy in heels, and he kept grabbing my arm to keep me fromfallingover,half-draggingmealong.Itmadeuslaughthatmuchmore.Ahappyfeelingstartedtowellupinme—Iwasn'tentirelyridoftheacheforLissa,butthiswasastart.

MaybeIdidn'thaveherandherfriends,butIhadmyownfriends.Itwasalso very likely that Iwas going to get head-over-heels drunk tonight,which,

whilenotagreatwaytosolvemyproblems,wouldatleastbereallyfun.Yeah.Mylifecouldbeworse.

ThenweranintoDimitriandAlberta.Theywereontheirwaysomewhereelse,talkingguardianbusiness.Alberta

smiled when she saw us, giving us the kind of indulgent look older peoplealwaysgivetoyoungerpeoplewhoappeartobehavingfunandactingsilly.Likeshe thoughtwewerecute.Thenerve.Westumbled toahalt,andMasonputahandonmyarmtosteadyme.

"Mr. Ashford, Miss Hathaway. I'm surprised you aren't already in thecommons.”

Mason gave her an angelic, teacher's-pet smile. "Got delayed, GuardianPetrov.Youknowhowitiswithgirls.Alwaysgottolookperfect.Youespeciallymustknowallaboutthat.”

NormallyIwouldhaveelbowedhimforsayingsomethingsostupid,butIwas staring at Dimitri and incapable of speech. Perhapsmore importantly, hewasstaringatmetoo.

Ihadontheblackdress,anditwaseverythingI'dhopeditcouldbe.Infact,itwasawonderAlbertadidn'tcallmeonthedresscoderightthereandthen.Thefabricclungeverywhere,andnoMoroigirl'schestcouldhaveheldthisdressup.Victor's rosehungaroundmyneck,and I'ddoneahastyblow-dryofmyhair,leavingitdownthewayIknewDimitrilikedit.Ihadn'tworntightsbecausenooneworetightswithdresseslikethisanymore,somyfeetwerefreezingintheheels.Allforthesakeoflookinggood.

AndIwasprettysureIlookeddamngood,butDimitri'sfacewasn'tgivinganythingaway.Hejustlookedatme—andlookedandlooked.Maybethatsaidsomethingaboutmyappearanceinandofitself.RememberinghowMasonsortof held my hand, I pulled away from him. He and Alberta finished up theirjokingremarks,andweallwentourseparateways.

Musicblastedinsidethecommonswhenwearrived,whiteChristmaslightsand—ugh—adiscoballcasting theonly light in theotherwisedarkened room.Gyratingbodies,mostlyunderclassmen,packedthedancefloor.Thosewhowereour age stood in too-cool clusters along the edgesof the room,waiting for anopportunetimetosneakoff.Anassortmentofchaperones,guardiansandMoroiteachersalike,patrolledaround,breakingup thosedancerswhodida little toomuchgyrating.

WhenIsawKirovainasleevelessplaiddress,IturnedtoMasonandsaid,"Areyousurewecan'thitthehardliquoryet?”

Hesnickeredandtookmyhandagain."Comeon,timeforyoursurprise.”Lettinghimleadme,Iwalkedacrosstheroom,cuttingthroughaclusterof

freshmenwholookedwaytooyoungtobedoingthekindofpelvicthruststheywereattempting.

Wherewerethechaperoneswhenyouneededthem?ThenIsawwherehewasleadingmeandcametoascreechinghalt.

"No,"Isaid,notbudgingwhenhetuggedmyhand."Comeon,it'sgoingtobegreat.”"You'retakingmetoJesseandRalf.TheonlywayIcaneverbeseenwith

themisifI'vegotabluntobject,andI'maimingbetweentheirlegs.”Hepulledmeagain."Notanymore.Comeon.”Reluctant, I finally startedmoving:myworst fearswere realizedwhen a

few pairs eyes turned ourway.Great. Everythingwas starting all over again.JesseandRalfdidn'tnoticeusat first,butwhentheydid,anamusingarrayofexpressions played over their faces. First they saw my body and the dress.Testosterone took over as pure male lust shone out of their faces. Then theyseemedtorealizeitwasmeandpromptlyturnedterrified.Cool.

MasongaveJesseasharppokeinthechestwiththeendofhisfinger."Allright,Zeklos.Tellher.”

Jessedidn'tsayanything,andMasonrepeatedthegesture,onlyharder."Tellher.”Notmeetingmyeyes, Jessemumbled,"Rose,weknownoneof that stuff

happened.”Ialmostchokedonmyownlaughter."Doyou?Wow.I'mreallygladtohear

that. Because you see, until you said that, I'd been thinking it hadhappened.ThankGodyouguysareheretosetmestraightandtellmewhatthehellIhaveorhaven'tdone!”

Theyflinched,andMason'slightexpressiondarkenedtosomethingharder."Sheknowsthat,"hegrowled."Tellhertherest.”Jessesighed."WediditbecauseMiatoldusto.”"And?"promptedMason."Andwe'resorry.”MasonturnedtoRalf."Iwanttohearitfromyou,bigboy.”Ralfwouldn'tmeetmyeyeseither,buthemumbledsomethingthatsounded

vaguelylikeanapology.Seeing themdefeated,Mason turned chipper. "Youhaven't heard thebest

partyet.”Icuthimasidelonglook."Yeah?Likethepartwherewerewindtimeand

noneofthiseverhappened?”"Nextbestthing."HetappedJesseagain."Tellher.Tellherwhyyoudidit.”JesselookedupandexchangeduneasylookswithRalf.

"Boys,"warnedMason,clearlydelightedaboutsomething,"you'remakingHathawayandmeveryangry.Tellherwhyyoudidit.”

Wearingthelookofonewhorealizedthingscouldn'tgetanyworse,Jessefinallymetmyeyes."Wediditbecauseshesleptwithus.Bothofus."

Twenty

MYMOUTHDROPPEDOPEN."Uh…wait…youmeansex?”Myastonishmentpreventedmefromthinkingofabetterresponse.Mason

thoughtitwashysterical.Jesselookedlikehewantedtodie."Of course I mean sex. She said she'd do it if we said that we'd…you

know….”Imadeaface."Youguysdidn'tboth,uh,doitatthesametime,didyou?”"No," said Jesse in disgust. Ralf kind of looked like he wouldn't have

minded."God,"Imuttered,pushinghairoutofmyface."Ican'tbelieveshehatesus

thatmuch.”"Hey,"exclaimedJesse,readingintomyinsinuation."What'sthatsupposed

tomean?We'renotthatbad.Andyouandme—wewereprettycloseto—”"No.Weweren'tevenclosetothat."Masonlaughedagain,andsomething

struck me. "If this…if this happened back then, though…she must have stillbeendatingAaron.”

Allthreeguysnodded."Oh.Whoa.”Miareallyhatedus.She'd justmovedbeyondpoor-girl-wronged-by-girl's-

brotherandwellintosociopathterritory.She'dsleptwiththesetwoandcheatedonaboyfriendwhomsheseemedtoadore.

Jesse and Ralf looked incredibly relievedwhenwewalked away.Masonslungalazyarmaroundmyshoulders."Well?Whatdoyouthink?Irule,right?Youcantellme.Iwon'tmind.”

Ilaughed."How'dyoufinallyfindthatout?”"I called in a lot of favors. Used some threats. The fact that Mia can't

retaliatehelpedtoo.”I recalledMia accostingme the other day. I didn't think shewas entirely

helplessyetbutdidn'tsayso."They'll start telling people on Monday" he continued. "They promised.

Everyone'llknowbylunch.”"Whynot now?" I asked sulkily. "They sleptwith a girl.Hurts hermore

thanthem.”"Yeah.True.Theydidn'twanttodealwithittonight.Youcouldstarttelling

peopleifyouwantedto.Wecouldmakeabanner.”Withasmany timesasMiahadcalledmeaslutandawhore?Notabad

idea."Yougotanymarkersandpaper?…”My words trailed off as I stared across the gym to where Lissa stood

surroundedbyadmirers,Aaron's armaroundherwaist.Sheworea sleekpinkcottonsheathinashadeInevercouldhavepulledoff.Herblondhairhadbeenpulledupinabunthatshe'dusedlittlecrystalhairpinson.Italmostlookedlikesheworeacrown.PrincessVasilisa.

The same feelings as earlier hummed through to me, anxiety andexcitement.Shejustcouldn'tquiteenjoyherselftonight.

Watchingherfromtheothersideoftheroom,lurkinginthedarkness,wasChristian.Hepracticallyblendedintotheshadows.

"Stop it," Mason chided me, seeing my stare. "Don't worry about hertonight.”

"Hardnotto.”"Itmakesyoulookalldepressed.Andyou're toohot in thatdress to look

depressed.Comeon,there'sEddie.”Hedraggedmeaway,butnotbeforeIcastonelastglanceatLissaovermy

shoulder.Oureyesmetbriefly.Regretflashedthroughthebond.ButIpushedheroutofmyhead—figurativelyspeaking—andmanagedto

putonagoodfacewhenwejoinedagroupofothernovices.WeearnedalotofmileagebytellingthemabouttheMiascandaland,pettyornot,seeingmynamecleared and getting revenge on her felt amazingly good. And as those in ourgroupwanderedoffandmingledwithothers,Icouldseethenewsspreadingandspreading.SomuchforwaitinguntilMonday.

Whatever.Ididn'tcare.Iwasactuallyhavingagoodtime.Ifellintomyoldrole,happytoseeIhadn'tgrowntoodustyinmakingfunnyandflirtyremarks.Yet,astimepassedandEddie'spartygrewcloser,IstartedtofeelLissa'sanxietypickupinintensity.Frowning,Istoppedtalkingandturnedaround,scanningtheroomforher.

There.Shewasstillwithagroupofpeople,still thesuninher littlesolarsystem.ButAaronwasleaningveryclosetoher,sayingsomethinginherear.AsmileIrecognizedasfakewasplasteredacrossherface,andtheannoyanceandanxietyfromherincreasedfurther.

Thenitspiked.Miahadwalkeduptothem.Whatevershe'dcometosay,shedidn'twasteanytimeinsayingit.Withthe

eyesofLissa'sadmirersonher,littleMiainherreddressgesturedwildly,mouthworking animatedly. I couldn't hear the words from across the room, but thefeelingsgrewdarkeranddarkerthroughthebond.

"I'vegottogo,"ItoldMason.I halfwalked, half ran over to Lissa's side, catching only the tail end of

Mia's tirade.ShewasyellingatLissafull forcenowandleaningintoherface.FromwhatIcouldtell,wordmusthavereachedheraboutJesseandRalfselling

herout."—youandyoursluttyfriend!I'mgoingtotelleveryonewhatapsychoyou

areandhowtheyhadtolockyouintheclinicbecauseyou'resocrazy.They'reputting you on medication. That's why you and Rose left before anyone elsecouldfindoutyoucut—”

Whoa,notgood.Justlikeatourfirstmeetinginthecafeteria,Igrabbedherandjerkedheraway.

"Hey,"Isaid."Sluttyfriendhere.RememberwhatIsaidaboutstandingtooclosetoher?”

Miasnarled,baringherfangs.AsI'dnotedbefore,Icouldn'tfeeltoosorryforheranymore.Shewasdangerous.

She had stooped low to get back atme.Now, somehow, she knew aboutLissa and the cutting. Really knew, too; she wasn't just guessing. Theinformationshehadnowsoundedbothlikewhattheguardiansonthescenehadreported, as well as what I'd told them about Lissa's history. Maybe someconfidentialdoctor'sstufftoo.Mia'dsnaggedtherecordssomehow.

Lissarealizedittoo,andthelookonherface—scaredandfragile,nomoreprincess—mademydecisionforme.Itdidn'tmatterthatKirovahadspokentheotherdayaboutgivingmemy freedom, that I'dbeenhavingagood time, andthat I could have let my worries go and partied tonight. I was going to ruineverything,righthereandrightnow.

I'mreallynotgoodwithimpulsecontrol.IpunchedMiaashardasIcould—harder,Ithink,thanI'devenhitJesse.I

hearda crunchasmy fist impactedhernose, andblood spurtedout.Someonescreamed.Miashriekedandflewbackwardsintosomesquealinggirlswhodidn'twant togetbloodon theirdresses. Iswooped inafterher,getting inonemoregoodpunchbeforesomebodypeeledmeoffher.

I didn't fight restraint as I had when they'd taken me from Mr. Nagy'sclassroom. I'd expected this as soon as I'd swung at her. Stopping all signs ofresistance,IlettwoguardiansleadmeoutofthedancewhileMs.Kirovatriedtobringsomesemblanceoforder.Ididn'tcarewhattheydidtome.Notanymore.Punishorexpel.Whatever.Icouldhandle—

Ahead of us, through the ebbing and flowing waves of students passingthroughthedoubledoors,Isawafigureinpinkdartout.Lissa.Myownout-of-control emotions had overridden hers, but there theywere, flooding back intome.Devastation.Despair.Everyoneknewhersecretnow.She'dfacemorethanjustidlespeculation.Pieceswouldfalltogether.Shecouldn'thandlethat.

KnowingIwasn'tgoinganywhere, I franticallysearchedforsomeway tohelpher.Adarkfigurecaughtmyeye."Christian!"Iyelled.He'dbeenstaringat

Lissa'sretreatingfigurebutglancedupatthesoundofhisname.Oneofmyescortsshushedmeandtookmyarm."Bequiet.”Iignoredher."Goafterher,"IcalledtoChristian."Hurry.”Hejustsatthere,andIsuppressedagroan."Go,youidiot!”My guardians snapped at me to be quiet again, but something inside of

Christianwokeup.Springingup fromhis loungingposition,he toreoff in thedirectionLissahadtraveled.

Noonewantedtodealwithmethatnight.There'dbehelltopaytomorrow—I heard talk of suspension or possibly even expulsion—but Kirova had herhands full with a bleedingMia and a hysterical student body. The guardiansescorted me to my room under the watchful eye of the dorm matron whoinformedmeshe'dcheckonmeeveryhourtomakesureIstayedinmyroom.Acoupleguardianswouldalsohangoutaroundthedorm'sentrances.ApparentlyIwasnowahigh-securityrisk.I'dprobablyjustruinedEddie'sparty;he'dneversneakagroupuptohisroomnow.

Heedlessofmydress, I flouncedonto the floorofmyroom,crossingmylegs underneathme. I reached out to Lissa. Shewas calmer now. The eventsfromthedancestillhurther terribly,butChristianwassoothinghersomehow,althoughwhetheritwasthroughsimplewordsorphysicalmojo,Icouldn'tsay.Ididn'tcare.Solongasshefeltbetterandwouldn'tdoanythingstupid.Ireturnedtomyself.

Yes, things were going to get messy now. Mia and Jesse's respectiveaccusationsweregoingtosettheschoolonfire.Iprobablywouldgetthrownoutandhavetogolivewithabunchofskankydhampirwomen.AtleastLissamightrealizeAaronwasboringandthatshewantedtobewithChristian.Butevenifthatwastherightthing,itstillmeant—

Christian.Christian.Christianwashurt.IsnappedbackintoLissa'sbody,suddenlysuckedinbytheterrorpounding

throughher.Shewassurrounded,surroundedbymenandwomenwhohadcomeoutofnowhere,burstingupintotheatticofthechapelwheresheandChristianhad gone to talk. Christian leapt up, fire flaring from his fingers. One of theinvadershithimontheheadwithsomethinghard,makinghisbodyslumptotheground.

I desperately hoped he was okay, but I couldn't waste any more energyworryingabouthim.AllmyfearwasforLissanow.Icouldn'tletthesamethinghappentoher.Icouldn'tletthemhurther.Ineededtosaveher,togetheroutofthere.ButIdidn'tknowhow.Shewastoofaraway,andIcouldn'tevenescape

herheadatthemoment,letalonerunoverthereorgethelp.The attackers approached her, calling her Princess and telling her not to

worry, and that they were guardians. And they did seem like guardians.Definitely dhampirs.Moving in precise, efficientways.But I didn't recognizethemasanyoftheguardiansfromschool.NeitherdidLissa.Guardianswouldn'thave attacked Christian. And guardians certainly wouldn't be binding andgaggingher—

Something forcedme out of her head, and I frowned, staring aroundmyroom.Ineededtogobacktoherandfindoutwhathadhappened.Usuallytheconnection just faded or I closed it off, but this—thiswas like something hadactuallyremovedmeandpulledme.Pulledmebackhere.

Butthatmadenosense.Whatcouldpullmebackfrom…wait.Mymindblanked.I couldn't rememberwhat I'd just been thinking about. Itwas gone. Like

staticinmybrain.WherehadIbeen?WithLissa?WhataboutLissa?Standingup,Iwrappedmyarmsaroundmyself,confused,tryingtofigure

outwhatwasgoingon.Lissa.SomethingwithLissa.Dimitri,avoiceinsidemyheadsuddenlysaid.GotoDimitri.Yes. Dimitri. My body and spirit burned for him all of a sudden, and I

wanted tobewithhimmore thanIeverhadbefore. Icouldn't stayawayfromhim.He'dknowwhattodo.

Andhe'dtoldmebeforeIshouldcometohimifsomethingwaswrongwithLissa.ToobadIcouldn'trememberwhatthatwas.Still.Iknewhe'dtakecareofeverything.

Gettinguptothestaffwingofthedormwasn'thard,sincetheywantedtokeepmeinsidetonight.Ididn'tknowwherehisroomwas,but itdidn'tmatter.Somethingwas pulling me to him, urging me closer. An instinct pushed metowardoneofthedoors,andIbeatthelivingdaylightsoutofit.

Afterafewmoments,heopenedit,browneyeswideningwhenhesawme."Rose?”"Letmein.It'sLissa.”He immediately stepped aside for me. I'd apparently caught him in bed,

becausethecoverswerepeeledbackononesideandonlyasmalltablesidelampshone in the darkness. Plus, hewore only cotton pajama bottoms; his chest—whichI'dneverseenbefore,andwow,diditlookgreat—wasbare.Theendsofhisdarkhaircurlednearhischinandappeareddamp,likehe'dtakenashowernotsolongago.

"What'swrong?”The soundof his voice thrilledme, and I couldn't answer. I couldn't stop

staringathim.Theforcethathadpulledmeupherepulledmetohim.Iwantedhimtotouchmesobadly,sobadlyIcouldbarelystandit.Hewassoamazing.So unbelievably gorgeous. I knew somewhere something was wrong, but itdidn'tseemimportant.NotwhenIwaswithhim.

Withalmostafootseparatingus, therewasnowayIcouldeasilykisshislips without his help. So instead, I aimed for his chest, wanting to taste thatwarm,smoothskin.

"Rose!"heexclaimed,steppingback."Whatareyoudoing?”"Whatdoyouthink?”Imoved towardhimagain,needing to touchhimandkisshimanddoso

manyotherthings."Areyoudrunk?"heasked,holdinghishandoutinawardinggesture."Don't I wish." I tried to dodge around him, then paused, momentarily

uncertain."Ithoughtyouwantedto—don'tyouthinkI'mpretty?"Inallthetimewe'dknowneachother, inall the time thisattractionhadbuilt,he'dnever toldmeIwaspretty.He'dhintedat it,but thatwasn't thesame.Anddespiteall theassurancesIhadfromotherguysthatIwashotnessincarnate,IneededtohearitfromtheoneguyIactuallywanted.

"Rose, I don't know what's going on, but you need to go back to yourroom.”

When Imoved toward him again, he reachedout andgrippedmywrists.Withthattouch,anelectriccurrentshotthroughbothofus,andIsawhimforgetwhateverhe'd justbeenworryingabout.Something seizedhim too, somethingthatmadehimsuddenlywantmeasmuchIwantedhim.

Releasingmywrists,hemovedhishandsupmyarms,slidingslowlyalongmyskin.Holdingmeinhisdark,hungrygaze,hepulledmetohim,pressingmerightuptohisbody.

Oneofhishandsmovedupthebackofmyneck,twininghisfingersinmyhair and tippingmy faceup tohis.Hebroughthis lipsdown,barelybrushingthemagainstmine.

Swallowing,Iaskedagain,"DoyouthinkI'mpretty?”Heregardedmewithutterseriousness, likehealwaysdid."I thinkyou're

beautiful.”"Beautiful?”"Youaresobeautiful,ithurtsmesometimes.”Hislipsmovedtomine,gentleatfirst,andthenhardandhungry.Hiskiss

consumedme.His hands onmy arms slid down, downmy hips, down to theedgeofmydress.Hegatheredupthefabricinhishandsandbeganpushingitupmylegs.Imeltedintothattouch,intohiskissandthewayitburnedagainstmy

mouth.His hands kept sliding up and up, until he'd pulled the dress overmyheadandtosseditonthefloor.

"You…yougotridofthatdressfast,"Ipointedoutbetweenheavybreaths."Ithoughtyoulikedit.”

"Idolikeit,"hesaid.Hisbreathingwasasheavyasmine."Iloveit.”Andthenhetookmetothebed.

TWENTY-ONE

I'DNEVERBEENCOMPLETELYNAKEDaroundaguybefore.Itscaredthe hell out ofme—even though it excitedme, too. Lying on the covers, weclungtoeachotherandkeptkissing—andkissingandkissingandkissing.Hishandsandlipstookpossessionofmybody,andeverytouchwaslikefireonmyskin.

After yearning for him for so long, I could barely believe this washappening.Andwhilethephysicalstufffeltgreat,Ialsojustlikedbeingclosetohim. I liked theway he looked atme, like Iwas the sexiest,mostwonderfulthingintheworld.IlikedthewayhewouldsaymynameinRussian,murmuredlikeaprayer:Roza,Roza…

Andsomewhere,somewhereinallofthis,wasthatsameurgingvoicethathaddrivenmeuptohisroom,avoicethatdidn'tsoundlikemyownbutthatIwas powerless to ignore. Stay with him, stay with him. Don't think aboutanythingelseexcepthim.Keeptouchinghim.Forgetabouteverythingelse.

Ilistened—notthatIreallyneededanyextraconvincing.Theburninginhiseyestoldmehewantedtodoalotmorethanwewere,

but he took things slow, maybe because he knew I was nervous. His pajamapants stayed on. At one point, I shifted so that I hovered over him, my hairhangingaroundhim.Hetiltedhisheadslightly,andIjustbarelycaughtsightofthebackof his neck. I brushedmy fingertips over the six tinymarks tattooedthere.

"DidyoureallykillsixStrigoi?"Henodded."Wow.”He brought my own neck down to his mouth and kissed me. His teeth

gentlygrazedmyskin,differentfromavampirebuteverybitasthrilling."Don'tworry.You'llhavealotmorethanmesomeday.”

"Doyoufeelguiltyaboutit?”"Hmm?”"Killing them.Yousaid in thevan that itwas the right thing todo,but it

still bothers you. It'swhy you go to church, isn't it? I see you there, but youaren'treallyintotheservices.”

He smiled, surprised and amused I'd guessed another secret about him."Howdoyouknowthesethings?I'mnotguiltyexactly…justsadsometimes.AllofthemusedtobehumanordhampirorMoroi.It'sawaste, that'sall,butasIsaidbefore,it'ssomethingIhavetodo.Somethingweallhavetodo.Sometimesitbothersme,andthechapelisagoodplacetothinkaboutthosekindsofthings.SometimesIfindpeacethere,butnotoften.Ifindmorepeacewithyou.”

Herolledmeoffofhimandmovedontopofmeagain.Thekissingpicked

up once more, harder this time. More urgent.Oh God, I thought. I'm finallygoingtodoit.Thisisit.Icanfeelit.

He must have seen the decision in my eyes. Smiling, he slid his handsbehindmyneckandunfastenedVictor'snecklace.

Hesetitonthebedsidetable.Assoonasthechainlefthisfingers,IfeltlikeI'dbeenslappedintheface.Iblinkedinsurprise.

Dimitrimusthavefeltthesameway."Whathappened?"heasked."I—Idon'tknow."IfeltlikeIwastryingtowakeup,likeI'dbeenasleepfor

twodays.Ineededtoremembersomething.Lissa.SomethingwithLissa.Myheadfelt funny.Notpainordizziness,but…thevoice, I realized.The

voiceurgingmetowardDimitriwasgone.Thatwasn'ttosayIdidn'twanthimanymorebecausehey,seeinghimthereinthosesexypajamabottoms,withthatbrownhairspillingoverthesideoffacewasprettyfine.ButInolongerhadthatoutsideinfluencepushingmetohim.Weird.

He frowned, no longer turned on. After several moments of thought, hereachedoverandpickedupthenecklace.Theinstanthisfingerstouchedit,Isawdesiresweepoverhimagain.Heslidhisotherhandontomyhip,andsuddenly,thatburninglustslammedbackintome.Mystomachwentqueasywhilemyskinstarted toprickle andgrowwarmagain.Mybreathingbecameheavy.His lipsmovedtowardmineagain.

Someinnerpartofmefoughtthrough."Lissa,"Iwhispered,squeezingmyeyesshut."Ihavetotellyousomething

aboutLissa.ButIcan't…remember…Ifeelsostrange….”"Iknow."Stillholdingontome,he restedhischeekagainstmyforehead.

"There'ssomething…somethinghere…"Hepulledhisfaceaway,andIopenedmyeyes."Thisnecklace.That'stheonePrinceVictorgaveyou?”

I nodded and could see the sluggish thought process trying to wake upbehindhis eyes.Taking a deepbreath, he removedhis hand frommyhip andpushedhimselfaway.

"Whatareyoudoing?"Iexclaimed."Comeback…”He looked likehewanted to—verybadly—but insteadhe climbedout of

thebed.Heandthenecklacemovedawayfromme.Ifeltlikehe'drippedpartofmeaway,butatthesametime,Ihadthatstartlingsensationofwakingup,likeIcouldthinkclearlyoncemorewithoutmybodymakingallthedecisions.

Ontheotherhand,Dimitristillworealookofanimalpassiononhim,anditseemedtotakeagreatdealofeffortforhimtowalkacrosstheroom.Hereachedthe window and managed to open it one-handed. Cold air blasted in, and Irubbedmyhandsovermyarmsforwarmth.

"Whatareyougoing to—?"Theanswerhitme, and I sprangoutofbed,just as the necklace flew out thewindow. "No!Do you know howmuch thatmusthave—?”

Thenecklacedisappeared,andInolongerfeltlikeIwaswakingup.Iwasawake.Painfully,startlinglyso.

Itookinmysurroundings.Dimitri'sroom.Menaked.Therumpledbed.Butallthatwasnothingcomparedtowhathitmenext."Lissa!" I gasped out. It all came back, the memories and the emotions.

And, in fact, her held-back emotions suddenly poured intome—at staggeringlevels.More terror. Intense terror.Those feelingswanted tosuckmeback intoherbody,butIcouldn'tletthem.Notquiteyet.Ifoughtagainsther,needingtostayhere.Withthewordscomingoutinarush,ItoldDimitrieverythingthathadhappened.

HewasinmotionbeforeIfinished,puttingonclothesandlookingeverybitlikeabadassgod.Orderingme togetdressed,he tossedmea sweatshirtwithCyrillicwritingonittowearovertheskimpydress.

Ihadahardtimefollowinghimdownstairs;hemadenoefforttoslowformethistime.Callsweremadewhenwegotthere.Ordersshouted.Beforelong,Iendedupintheguardians'mainofficewithhim.Kirovaandotherteacherswerethere.Mostof thecampus'sguardians.Everyone seemed to speakatonce.Allthewhile,IfeltLissa'sfear,felthermovingfartherandfartheraway.

Iyelledat themtohurryupanddosomething,butnooneexceptDimitriwouldbelievemy story about her abductionuntil someone retrievedChristianfromthechapelandthenverifiedLissareallywasn'toncampus.

Christianstaggeredin,supportedbytwoguardians.Dr.Olendzkiappearedshortlythereafter,checkinghimoutandwipingbloodawayfromthebackofhishead.

Finally,Ithought,somethingwouldhappen."HowmanyStrigoiwerethere?"oneoftheguardiansaskedme."Howintheworlddidtheygetin?"mutteredsomeoneelse.Istared."Wh—?Thereweren'tanyStrigoi.”Severalsetsofeyesstaredatme."Whoelsewouldhavetakenher?"asked

Ms.Kirovaprimly."Youmusthaveseenitwrongthroughthe…vision.”"No.I'mpositive.Itwas…theywere…guardians.”"She'sright,”mumbledChristian,stillunderthedoctor'sministrations.He

wincedasshedidsomethingtothebackofhishead."Guardians.”"That'simpossible,"someonesaid."Theyweren't school guardians." I rubbedmy forehead, fighting hard to

keepfromleavingtheconversationandgoingbacktoLissa.Myirritationgrew.

"Willyouguysgetmoving?She'sgettingfartheraway!”"You're saying a group of privately retained guardians came in and

kidnappedher?"ThetoneinKirova'svoiceimpliedIwasplayingsomekindofjoke.

"Yes,"Irepliedthroughgrittedteeth."They…”Slowly,carefully,IslippedmymentalrestraintandflewintoLissa'sbody.I

satinacar,anexpensivecarwithtintedwindowstokeepoutmostofthelight.Itmightbe"night"here,but itwasfulldayfor therestof theworld.Oneof theguardians from the chapel drove; another sat beside him in the front—one Irecognized. Spiridon. In the back, Lissa satwith tied hands, another guardianbesideher,andontheotherside—

"Theywork forVictorDashkov," I gasped out, focusing back onKirovaandtheothers."They'rehis.”

"Prince Victor Dashkov?" asked one of the guardians with a snort. LiketherewasanyotherfreakingVictorDashkov.

"Please," I moaned, hands clutching my head. "Do something. They'regettingsofaraway.They'reon…"Abriefimage,seenoutsidethecarwindow,flaredinmyvision."Eighty-three.Headedsouth.”

"Eighty-threealready?Howlongagodidtheyleave?Whydidn'tyoucomesooner?”

MyeyesturnedanxiouslytoDimitri."A compulsion spell," he said slowly. "A compulsion spell put into a

necklacehegaveher.Itmadeherattackme.”"No one can use that kind of compulsion," exclaimedKirova. "No one's

donethatinages.”"Well,someonedid.BythetimeI'drestrainedherandtakenthenecklace,a

lot of time had passed," Dimitri continued, face perfectly controlled. No onequestionedthestory.

Finally, finally, thegroupmoved intoaction.Noonewanted tobringme,butDimitri insistedwhenherealizedIcouldleadthemtoher.Threedetailsofguardians set out in sinister black SUVs. I rode in the first one, sitting in thepassenger seatwhileDimitri drove.Minutespassed.Theonly timeswe spokewaswhenIgaveareport.

"They're still on Eighty-three…but their turn is coming. They aren'tspeeding.Theydon'twanttogetpulledover.”

Henodded,notlookingatme.Hemostdefinitelywasspeeding.Giving him a sidelong glance, I replayed tonight's earlier events. In my

mind'seye,Icouldseeitallagain,thewayhe'dlookedatmeandkissedme.Butwhathaditbeen?Anillusion?Atrick?Onthewaytothecar,he'dtold

me there reallyhadbeena compulsion spell in thenecklace, a lust one. I hadnever heard of such a thing, butwhen I'd asked formore information, he justsaiditwasatypeofmagicearthusersoncepracticedbutneverdidanymore.

"They'returning,"Isaidsuddenly."Ican'tseetheroadname,butI'llknowwhenwe'reclose.”

Dimitrigruntedinacknowledgment,andIsankfurtherintomyseat.What had it all meant? Had it meant anything to him? It had definitely

meantalottome."There," I said about twenty minutes later, indicating the rough road

Victor'scarhadturnedoffon.Itwasunpavedgravel,andtheSUVgaveusanedgeoverhisluxurycar.

Wedroveon insilence, theonlysoundcomingfromthecrunchingof thegravelunderthetires.Dustkickedupoutsidethewindows,swirlingaroundus.

"They'returningagain.”Farther and farther off the main routes they went, and we followed the

wholetime,ledbymyinstructions.Finally,IfeltVictor'scarcometoastop."They'reoutsideasmallcabin,"Isaid."They'retakingher—”"Whyareyoudoingthis?What'sgoingon?”Lissa.Cringingandscared.Herfeelingshadpulledmeintoher."Come, child," saidVictor,moving into the cabin, unsteady on his cane.

Oneofhisguardiansheldthedooropen.AnotherpushedLissaalongandsettledher intoachairnearasmall table inside. Itwascold inhere,especially in thepinkdress.Victor sat across fromher.When she started to get up, a guardiangaveherawarninglook."DoyouthinkI'dseriouslyhurtyou?”

"What did you do to Christian?" she cried, ignoring the question. "Is hedead?

"TheOzeraboy?Ididn'tmeanforthattohappen.Wedidn'texpecthimtobe there.We'd hoped to catch you alone, to convince others you'd run awayagain.We'dmadesurerumorsalreadycirculatedaboutthat.”

We?Irecalledhowthestorieshadresurfacedthisweek…fromNatalie."Now?"Hesighed,spreadinghishandswideinahelplessgesture."Idon't

know. I doubt anyonewill connect it tous, even if theydon't believeyou ranaway.Roseisthebiggestliability.We'dintendedto…dispatchher,lettingothersthinkshe'drunawayaswell.Thespectacleshecreatedatyourdancemadethatimpossible,butIhadanotherplaninplacetomakesureshestaysoccupiedforsometime…probablyuntiltomorrow.Wewillhavetocontendwithherlater.”

Hehadn't countedonDimitri figuringout the spell.He'd figuredwe'dbetoobusygettingitonallnight.

"Why?"askedLissa."Whyareyoudoingallthis?”

Hisgreeneyeswidened,remindingherofherfather's.Theymight be distant relatives, but that jade-green color ran in both the

Dragomirs and theDashkovs. "I'm surprisedyouevenhave to ask,mydear. Ineedyou.Ineedyoutohealme."

Twenty-two

"HEALYOU?”Healhim?Mythoughtsechoedhers."You'retheonlyway,"hesaidpatiently."Theonlywaytocurethisdisease.

I'vebeenwatchingyouforyears,waitinguntilIwascertain.”Lissashookherhead."Ican't…no.Ican'tdoanythinglikethat.”"Your healing powers are incredible. No one has any idea just how

powerful.”"Idon'tknowwhatyou'retalkingabout.”"Comenow,Vasilisa.Iknowabouttheraven—Nataliesawyoudoit.She'd

beenfollowingyou.AndIknowhowyouhealedRose.”She realized the pointlessness of denying it. "That…was different. Rose

wasn'tthathurt.Butyou…Ican'tdoanythingaboutSandovsky'sSyndrome.”"Notthathurt?"he laughed."I'mnot talkingaboutherankle—whichwas

still impressive. I'm talking about the car accident. Because you're right, youknow.Rosedidn'tget'thathurt.'Shedied.”

Heletthewordssinkin."That's…no.Shelived,"Lissafinallymanaged."No.Well,yes, shedid.But I readall the reports.Therewasnowayshe

should have survived—especiallywith somany injuries.You healed her.Youbrought her back."He sighed, halfwistful and halfweary. "I'd suspected youcoulddothisforsolong,andItriedsohardtorepeatit…toseehowmuchyoucouldcontrol…”

Lissacaughtonandgasped."Theanimals.Itwasyou.”"WithNatalie'shelp.”"Whywouldyoudothat?Howcouldyou?”"BecauseIhadtoknow.Ihaveonlyafewmoreweekstolive,Vasilisa.If

youcantrulybringbackthedead,thenyoucancureSandovsky's.IhadtoknowbeforeI tookyouaway thatyoucouldhealatwillandnot just inmomentsofpanic.”

"Whytakemeatall?"Asparkofangerflaredupinher."You'remynear-uncle.Ifyouwantedmetodothis—ifyoureallythinkIcan…"Hervoiceandfeelingsshowedmeshedidn'treallyentirelybelieveshecouldhealhim."Thenwhykidnapme?Whydidn'tyoujustask?”

"Becauseit'snotaonetimeaffair.Ittookalongtimetofigureoutwhatyouare, but I managed to acquire some of the old histories…scrolls kept out ofMoroimuseums.WhenIreadabouthowwieldingspiritworks—”

"Wieldingwhat?”

"Spirit.It'swhatyou'vespecializedin.”"Ihaven'tspecializedinanything!You'recrazy.”"Whereelsedoyouthinkthesepowersofyourshavecomefrom?Spiritis

anotherelement,onefewpeoplehaveanymore.”Lissa'smindwas still reeling from the kidnapping and the possible truth

thatshe'dbroughtmebackfromthedead."Thatdoesn'tmakeanysense.Evenifitwasn'tcommon,Istillwouldhaveheardofanotherelement!Orofsomeonehavingit.”

"Nooneknowsaboutspiritanymore.It'sbeenforgotten.Whenpeopledospecialize in it, nobody realizes it. They think the person simply hasn'tspecializedatall.”

"Look,ifyou'rejusttryingtomakemefeel—"Sheabruptlycutherselfoff.Shewasangryandafraid,butbehindthoseemotions,herhigherreasoninghadbeenprocessingwhathe'dsaidaboutspiritusersandspecializing.Itnowcaughtupwithher."OhmyGod.VladimirandMs.Karp.”

Hegaveheraknowinglook."You'veknownaboutthisallalong.”"No! I swear. It's just something Rose was looking into…She said they

werelikeme…."Lissawasstartingtochangefromalittlescaredtoallscared.Thenewswastooshocking.

"Theyarelikeyou.ThebooksevensayVladimirwas'fullofspirit.'"Victorseemedtofindthatfunny.Seeingthatsmilemademewanttoslaphim.

"I thought . . ." Lissa still wanted him to be wrong. The idea of notspecializingwassaferthanspecializinginsomefreakishelement."Ithoughtthatmeant,like,theHolySpirit.”

"So does everyone else, but no. It's something else entirely. An elementthat'swithinallofus.Amasterelementthatcangiveyouindirectcontroloverthe others." Apparently my theory about her specializing in all the elementswasn'tsofaroff.

Sheworkedhardtogetagriponthisnewsandherownself-control."Thatdoesn't answer my question. It doesn't matter if I have this spirit thing orwhatever.Youdidn'thavetokidnapme.”

"Spirit, as you've seen, can heal physical injuries.Unfortunately, it's onlygoodonacuteinjuries.Onetimethings.Rose'sankle.Theaccidentwounds.Forsomethingchronic—say,ageneticdiseaselikeSandovsky's—continualhealingsarerequired.Otherwiseitwillkeepcomingback.That'swhatwouldhappentome.Ineedyou,Vasilisa.Ineedyoutohelpmefightthisandkeepitaway.SoIcanlive.”

"That still doesn't explainwhy you tookme," she argued. "Iwould havehelpedyouifyou'dasked.”

"Theyneverwouldhaveletyoudoit.Theschool.Thecouncil.Oncetheygotovertheshockoffindingaspirituser,they'dgethunguponethics.Afterall,howdoesonechoosewhogets tobehealed?They'd say itwasn't fair.That itwaslikeplayingGod.Orelsethey'dworryaboutthetollit'dtakeonyou.”

Sheflinched,knowingexactlywhattollhereferredto.Seeingherexpression,henodded."Yes.Iwon'tlietoyou.Itwillbehard.It

willexhaustyou—mentallyandphysically.ButImustdoit.Iamsorry.You'llbeprovidedwithfeedersandotherentertainmentsforyourservices.”

Sheleaptfromthechair.Benimmediatelysteppedforwardandpushedherback into it."Andthenwhat?Areyougoing to justmakemeaprisonerhere?Yourownprivatenurse?”

Hemade that annoying open-palmed gesture again. "I'm sorry. I have nochoice.”

White-hot anger blasted away the fear inside of her. She spoke in a lowvoice."Yes.Youdon'thavethechoice,becausethisismewe'retalkingabout.”

"It's better for you this way. You know how the others turned out. HowVladimirspentthelastofhisdaysstark,ravingmad.HowSonyaKarphadtobetakenaway.Thetraumayou'veexperiencedsincetheaccidentcomesfrommorethanjustyourfamily'sloss.It'sfromusingspirit.Theaccidentwokethespiritinyou;yourfearoverseeingRosedeadmadeitburstout,allowingyoutohealher.It forged your bond. And once it's out, you can't put it back. It's a powerfulelement—butit'salsodangerous.Earthusersgettheirpowerfromtheearth,airusersfromtheair.Butspirit?Wheredoyouthinkthatcomesfrom?”

Sheglared."Itcomesfromyou,fromyourownessence.Tohealanother,youmustgive

partofyourself.Themoreyoudothat, themoreitwilldestroyyouovertime.Youmustbenoticingthatalready.I'veseenhowmuchcertainthingsupsetyou,howfragileyouare.”

"I'mnotfragile,"snappedLissa."AndI'mnotgoingtogocrazy.I'mgoingtostopusingspiritbeforethingsgetworse.”

Hesmiled."Stopusingit?Youmightaswellstopbreathing.Spirithasitsownagenda…You'llalwayshavetheurgetohelpandheal.It'spartofyou.Youresisted the animals, but you didn't think twice about helpingRose.You can'teven help compulsion—which spirit also gives you special strength in. Andthat's how it will always be. You can't avoid spirit. Better to stay here, inisolation, away from further sources of stress. You'd either have becomeincreasinglyunstableattheAcademy,ortheywouldhaveputyouonsomepillthatwouldhavemadeyoufeelbetterbutstuntedyourpower.”

Acalmcoreofconfidencesettledinsideher,oneverydifferentfromwhat

I'dobservedoverthelastcoupleofyears."Iloveyou,UncleVictor,butI'mtheonewhohastodealwiththatanddecidewhattodo.Notyou.You'remakingmegiveupmylifeforyours.That'snotfair.”

"It'samatterofwhichlifemeansmore.Iloveyoutoo.Verymuch.ButtheMoroi are falling apart. Our numbers are dropping as we let the Strigoi preyuponus.Weusedtoactivelyseekthemout.NowTatianaandtheotherleadershide away.They keep you and your peers isolated. In the old days, youweretrained to fight alongside your guardians!Youwere taught to usemagic as aweapon.Notanylonger.Wewait.Wearevictims."Ashestaredoff,bothLissaandIcouldseehowcaughtupinhispassionhewas."IwouldhavechangedthatifIwereking.IwouldhavebroughtaboutarevolutionthelikesofwhichneitherMoroi nor Strigoi have ever seen. I should have been Tatiana's heir. Shewasreadytonamemebeforetheydiscoveredthedisease,andthenshewouldnot.IfIwerecured…ifIwerecured,Icouldtakemyrightfulplace…”

Hiswords triggeredsomethinginsideofLissa,asuddenconsiderationforthe state of the Moroi. She'd never contemplated what he'd said, about howdifferentitmightbeifMoroiandtheirguardiansfoughtsidebysidetoridtheworldof theStrigoi and their evil. It remindedherofChristian andwhathe'dsaidaboutusingmagicasaweapontoo.ButevenifshedidappreciateVictor'sconvictions,neitherofusthoughtitwasworthwhathewantedhertodo.

"I'msorry,"shewhispered."I'msorryforyou.Butpleasedon'tmakemedothis.”

"Ihaveto.”Shelookedhimstraightintheeye."Iwon'tdoit.”He inclined his head, and someone stepped forward from the corner.

AnotherMoroi. No one I knew.Walking around behind Lissa, he untied herhands.

"ThisisKenneth."Victorheldhishandsouttowardherfreeones."Please,Vasilisa.Takemyhands.SendthemagicthroughmejustasyoudidwithRose.”

Sheshookherhead."No.”His voice was less kindly when he spoke again. "Please. One way or

another,youwillhealme.I'dratheritbeonyourterms,notours.”Sheshookherheadagain.HemadeaslightgesturetowardKenneth.Andthat'swhenthepainstarted.Lissascreamed.Iscreamed.IntheSUV,Dimitri'sgriponthewheeljerkedinsurprise,makingusveer.

Castingmeanalarmedlook,hestartedtopullover."No,no!Keepgoing!"Ipressedmypalmstomytemples."Wehavetoget

there!”

From behindmy seat,Alberta reached forward and rested a hand onmyshoulder."Rose,what'shappening?”

Iblinkedbacktears."They'retorturingher…withair.Thisguy…Kenneth…he'smaking it press against her…intoher head.Thepressure's insane. It feelslikemy—her—skull'sgonnaexplode."Istartedsobbing.

Dimitrilookedatmeoutofthecornerofhiseyeandpressedthegaspedaldownharder.

Kenneth didn't stopwith just the physical force of air.He also used it toaffectherbreathing.Sometimeshe'dsmotherherwithit;othertimeshe'dtakeitallawayandleavehergasping.Afterenduringallthatfirsthand—anditwasbadenough secondhand—I felt pretty confident I would have done anything theywanted.

Andfinally,shedid.Hurting and bleary-eyed,Lissa tookVictor's hands. I'd never been in her

headwhen sheworkedmagic and didn't knowwhat to expect. At first, I feltnothing. Just a sense of concentration. Then…itwas like…I don't even knowhow to describe it. Color and light and music and life and joy and love…somanywonderfulthings,allthelovelythingsthatmakeuptheworldandmakeitworthlivingin.

Lissasummonedupallofthosethings,asmanyasshecould,andsentthemintoVictor. Themagic flowed through both of us, brilliant and sweet. It wasalive.Itwasherlife.Andaswonderfulasitallfelt,shewasgrowingweakerandweaker.Butasallofthoseelements—boundbythemysteriousspiritelement—flowedintoVictor,hegrewstrongerandstronger.

The change was startling. His skin smoothed, no longer wrinkled andpocked.Thegraythinninghairfilledout,turningdarkandlustrousoncemore.Thegreeneyes—stilljadelike—sparkledagain,turningalertandlively.

He'dbecometheVictorsherememberedfromherchildhood.Exhausted,Lissapassedout.IntheSUV,Itriedtorelatewhatwashappening.Dimitri'sfacegrewdarker

anddarker,andhespatoutastringofRussianswearwordshestillhadn'ttaughtmethemeaningsof.

Whenwewereaquartermile from thecabin,Albertamadeacallonhercellphone,andourwholeconvoypulledover.Alloftheguardians—morethanadozen—got out and stood huddled, planning strategy. Someonewent ahead toscoutandreturnedwithareportonthenumberofpeopleinsideandoutsideofthecabin.Whenthegroupseemedreadytodisperse,Istartedtogetoutofthecar.Dimitristoppedme.

"No,Roza.Youstayhere.”

"Thehellwiththat.Ihavetogohelpher.”He cuppedmy chin with his hands, fixingme with his eyes. "You have

helpedher.Yourjobisdone.Youdiditwell.Butthisisn'tanyplaceforyou.SheandIbothneedyoutostaysafe.”

Only the realization that arguing would delay the rescue kept me quiet.Swallowingbackanyprotests,Inodded.Henoddedbackandjoinedtheothers.Allofthemslippedoffintothewoods,blendingwiththetrees.

Sighing, I kicked the passenger seat back and lay down. I was so tired.Eventhoughthesunpouredthroughthewindshield,itwasnightforme.I'dbeenupformostofit,andalothadhappenedinthattime.BetweentheadrenalineofmyownroleandsharingLissa'spain,Icouldhavepassedoutjustlikeshehad.

Exceptthatshewasawakenow.Slowly,herperceptionsdominatedmineoncemore.Shelayonacouchin

the cabin. One of Victor's henchmen must have carried her there after she'dfainted.Victorhimself—aliveandwellnow,thankstohisabuseofher—stoodinthekitchenwiththeothersastheyallspokeinlowvoicesabouttheirplans.OnlyonestoodnearLissa,keepingwatch.He'dbeeasy to takedownwhenDimitriandtheBadassTeamburstinside.

Lissa studied the lone guardian and then glanced at awindowbeside thecouch.Stilldizzyfromthehealing,shemanagedtositup.Theguardianturnedaround,watchingherwarily.Shemethiseyesandsmiled.

"You'regoingtostayquietnomatterwhatIdo,"shetoldhim."Youaren'tgoingtocallforhelportellanyonewhenIleave.Okay?”

Thethrallofcompulsionslidoverhim.Henoddedinagreement.Moving toward thewindow,sheunlocked itandslid theglassup.Asshe

did, a tumble of considerations played through hermind. Shewasweak. Shedidn'tknowhowfar from theAcademy—fromanything, really—shewas.Shehadnocluehowfarshecouldgetbeforesomeonenoticed.

Butshealsoknewshemightnotgetanotherchanceatescape.Shehadnointentionofspendingtherestofherlifeinthiscabininthewoods.

Atanyothertime,Iwouldhavecheeredonherboldness,butnotthistime.Notwhen all those guardianswere about to save her. She needed to stay put.Unfortunately,shecouldn'thearmyadvice.

Lissaclimbedoutthewindow,andIsworeoutloud."What?What'dyousee?"askedavoicebehindme.Ijerkedupfrommyrecliningpositioninthecar,bangingmyheadonthe

ceiling.Glancingbehindme,IfoundChristianpeeringupfromthecargospacebehindthefarthestbackseats.

"Whatareyoudoinghere?"Iasked.

"What'sitlooklike?I'mastowaway.”"Don'tyouhaveaconcussionorsomething?”He shrugged like it didn't matter. What a great pair he and Lissa were.

Neitherafraidtotakeoncrazyfeatswhileseriouslyinjured.Still,ifKirovahadmademestaybehind,Iwouldhavebeenrightbesidehimintheback.

"What'shappening?"heasked."Didyouseesomethingnew?Hastily,Itoldhim.IalsogotoutofthecarasIspoke.Hefollowed."Shedoesn'tknowourguysarealreadycomingforher.I'mgoingtogoget

herbeforeshekillsherselfwithexhaustion.”"What about the guardians? The school's, I mean. Are you going to tell

themshe'sgone?”Ishookmyhead."They'reprobablyalreadybustingdownthecabin'sdoor.

I'm going after her." Shewas somewhere off to the right side of the cabin. Icouldheadinthatdirectionbutwouldn'tbeabletogetverypreciseuntilIwasmuch closer to her. Still, it didn'tmatter. I had to find her. SeeingChristian'sface,Icouldn't resistgivinghimadrysmile."Andyeah,Iknow.You'regoingwithme."

Twenty-three

I'DNEVERHADSOMUCHtroublestayingoutofLissa'sheadbefore,butthen,we'dneverbeenthroughanythinglikethistogethereither.ThestrengthofherthoughtsandfeelingskepttryingtopullmeinasIhurriedthroughtheforest.

Running through thebrushandwoods,Christianand Imovedfartherandfartherfromthecabin.Man,howIwishedLissahadstayedbackthere.Iwouldhavelovedtoseetheraidthroughhereyes.Butthatwasbehindusnow,andasIran,Dimitri'spushonlapsandstaminapaidoff.Shewasn'tmovingveryquickly,andIcouldfeelthedistanceclosingbetweenus,givingmeamorepreciseideaofherlocation.Likewise,Christiancouldn'tkeepupwithme.Istartedtoslowforhimbutsoonrealizedthefoolishnessofthat.

Sodidhe."Go,"hegaspedout,wavingmeon.WhenI reachedapointcloseenough toher that I thoughtshecouldhear

me, I called out her name, hoping to get her to turn around. Instead, whatansweredmewasasetofhowls—asoftcaninebaying.

Psi-hounds.Of course. Victor had said he hunted with them; he couldcontrol those beasts. I suddenly understood why no one at school recalledsendingpsi-houndsafterLissaandmeinChicago.TheAcademyhadn'tarrangedthat;Victorhad.

Aminutelater,IreachedaclearingwhereLissacringed,backagainstatree.Fromher looksandbond feelings, sheshouldhave fainted longago.Only thebarestscrapsofwillpowerkeptherhangingon.Wide-eyedandpale,shestaredin horror at the four psi-hounds cornering her. Noticing the full sunlight, itoccurredtomethatsheandChristianhadanotherobstacletocontendwithouthere.

"Hey,"Iyelledatthehounds,tryingtodrawthemtowardme.Victormusthavesentthemtotrapher,butIhopedthey'dsenseandrespondtoanotherthreat—especiallyadhampir.Psi-houndsdidn't likeusanybetter thanotheranimalsdid.

Sureenough,theyturnedonme,teethbaredanddroolcomingoutoftheirmouths.Theyresembledwolves,onlywithbrownfurandeyesthatglowedlikeorangefire.He'dprobablyorderedthemnot toharmher,but theyhadnosuchinstructionsregardingme.

Wolves. Just like in science class.What hadMs.Meissner said?A lot ofconfrontationswereallaboutwillpower?Bearingthismind,Itriedtoprojectanalphaattitude,butIdon'tthinktheyfellforit.Anyoneofthemoutweighedme.Ohyeah—theyalsooutnumberedme.No,theydidn'thaveanythingtobescaredof.

Tryingtopretendthiswasjustafree-for-allmatchwithDimitri,Ipickedupabranchfromthegroundthathadaboutthesameheftandweightasabaseballbat.I'djustpositioneditinmyhandswhentwoofthehoundsjumpedme.Clawsandteethbitintome,butIheldmyownsurprisinglywellasItriedtoremembereverythingI'dlearnedinthelasttwomonthsaboutfightingbiggerandstrongeropponents.

Ididn'tlikehurtingthem.Theyremindedmetoomuchofdogs.Butitwasmeorthem,andsurvivalinstinctswonout.OneofthemImanagedtobeattotheground, dead or unconscious I didn't know. The other was still on me, stillcomingonfastandfurious.Hiscompanionslookedreadytojoinhim,butthenanewcompetitorburstonthescene—sortof.Christian.

"Getoutofhere,"Iyelledathim,shakingoffmyhoundasitsclawsrippedinto the bare skin ofmy leg, nearly topplingme over. Iwas stillwearing thedress,thoughI'dshedtheheelsawhileago.

ButChristian,likeanylovesickguy,didn'tlisten.Hepickedupabranchaswellandswungitatoneofthehounds.Flamesburstfromthewood.Thehoundbackedup,stillcompelledtofollowVictor'sorders,thoughalsoclearlyafraidofthefire.

Itscompanion,thefourthhound,circledawayfromthetorchandcameupbehind Christian. Smart little bastard. It sprang at Christian, hitting him backfirst. The branch flew from his hands, the fire immediately going out. Bothhoundsthenleaptontohisfallenform.Ifinishedmyhound—againfeelingsickoverwhatIhadtodotosubdueit—andmovedtowardtheothertwo,wonderingifIhadthestrengthtotakeontheselastones.

But I didn't have to. Rescue appeared in the form of Alberta, emergingthroughsometrees.

Withaguninhand,sheshotthehoundswithouthesitation.Boringashellperhaps—and completely useless against Strigoi—but against other things?Guns were tried and true. The hounds stopped moving and slumped next toChristian'sbody.

AndChristian'sbody…Allthreeofusmadeourwayovertoit—LissaandIpracticallycrawling.

WhenIsawit,Ihadtolookaway.Mystomachlurched,andittookalotofeffortnottothrowup.Hewasn'tdeadyet,butIdidn'tthinkhehadmuchlonger.

Lissa'seyes,wideanddistraught,drankhimin.Tentatively,shereachedouttowardhimandthendroppedherhand.

"Ican't,"shemanagedinasmallvoice."Idon'thavethestrengthleft.”Alberta,leatheryfacebothhardandcompassionate,gentlytuggedherarm.

"Comeon,Princess.Weneedtogetoutofhere.We'llsendhelp.”

TurningbacktoChristian,IforcedmyselftolookathimandletmyselffeelhowmuchLissacaredabouthim.

"Liss," Isaidhesitantly.She lookedoveratme, likeshe'dforgottenIwaseven there. Wordlessly, I brushed my hair away from my neck and tilted ittowardher.

She stared for a moment, blank-faced; then understanding shone in hereyes.

Those fangs that lurked behind her pretty smile bit intomy neck, and asmallmoanescapedmylips.Ihadn'trealizedhowmuchI'dmissedit,thatsweet,wonderful pain followed by gloriouswonder.Bliss settled overme.Dizzying.Joyful.Likebeinginadream.

Idon'tentirelyrememberhowlongLissadrankfromme.Probablynotthatlong. Shewould never even consider drinking the quantities thatwould kill apersonandmakeheraStrigoi.Shefinished,andAlbertacaughtmeasIstartedtosway.

Dizzily, IwatchedasLissa leanedoverChristianand restedherhandsonhim.Inthedistance,Iheardtheotherguardianscrashingthroughtheforest.

Noglowingorfireworkssurroundedthehealing.Italltookplaceinvisibly,occurring betweenLissa andChristian.Even though the bite's endorphins hadnumbedmyconnectiontoher,IrememberedVictor'shealingandthewonderfulcolorsandmusicshemustbebringingforth.

Amiracleunfoldedbeforemyeyes,andAlbertagasped.Christian'swoundsclosed. The blood dried up. Color—asmuch as aMoroi ever had, at least—returned to his cheeks. His eyelids fluttered, and his eyes regained their lifeagain.FocusingonLissa,hesmiled.ItwaslikewatchingaDisneymovie.

Imusthavekeeledoverafterthat,becauseIdon'trememberanythingelse.

Eventually,IwokeupintheAcademy'sclinic,wheretheyforcedfluidsandsugarintomefortwodays.Lissastayedbymysidealmosttheentiretime,andslowly,theeventsofthekidnappingunfolded.

Wehad to tellKirovaanda fewchoiceothersaboutLissa'spowers,howshe'dhealedVictorandChristianand,well,me.Thenewswasshocking,buttheadministratorsagreedtokeepitsecretfromtherestoftheschool.NooneevenconsideredtakingLissaawayliketheyhadMs.Karp.

MostlyalltheotherstudentsknewwasthatVictorDashkovhadkidnappedLissaDragomir.Theydidn't knowwhy.SomeofhisguardianshaddiedwhenDimitri'sbandattacked—adamnedshame,whenguardiannumbersweresolowalready.Victorwasnowbeingheldunder24/7guardattheschool,waitingfora

royal regiment of guardians to carry him away. TheMoroi rulers might be amostly symbolic government within another country's larger government, buttheyhadsystemsofjustice,andI'dheardaboutMoroiprisons.NotanyplaceI'dwanttobe.

AsforNatalie…thatwastrickier.Shewasstillaminor,butshe'dconspiredwith her father. She'd brought in the dead animals and kept an eye onLissa'sbehavior—evenbeforeweleft.Beinganearthuser likeVictor,she'dalsobeenthe one to rot the bench that brokemy ankle.After she'd seenme holdLissabackfromthedove,sheandVictorrealizedthattheyneededtoinjuremetogetto her—it was their only chance to get her to heal again. Natalie had simplywaited for a good opportunity. Shewasn't locked up or anything yet, and theAcademydidn'tknowwhattodowithheruntilaroyalcommandcame.

I couldn't help but feel sorry for her. She was so awkward and self-conscious.Anyonecouldhavemanipulatedher, letaloneherfather,whomshelovedandfromwhomshesodesperatelywantedattention.Shewouldhavedoneanything. Rumor said she'd stood screaming outside the detention center,beggingthemtoletherseehim.They'drefusedandhauledheraway.

Meanwhile,Lissa and I slippedback into our friendship like nothinghadhappened.Intherestofherworld,alothadhappened.Afterallthatexcitementanddrama,sheseemedtogainanewsenseofwhatmatteredtoher.ShebrokeupwithAaron.I'msureshediditverynicely,butitstillhadtobehardonhim.She'd dropped him twice now.The fact that his last girlfriend had cheated onhimprobablywasn'thelpinghisconfidenceany.

Andwithoutanymorehesitation,LissastarteddatingChristian,notcaringabout the consequences to her reputation. Seeing them out in public, holdinghands,mademedoadoubletake.Hedidn'tseemabletobelieveithimself.Therestofourclassmateswerealmosttoostunnedtoevencomprehendityet.Theycould barely process acknowledging his existence, let alone him being withsomeonelikeher.

Myownromanticstatewaslessrosythanhers—ifyoucouldevencallitaromanticstate.Dimitrihadn'tvisitedmeduringmyrecovery,andourpracticeswere indefinitely suspended. It wasn't until the fourth day after Lissa'skidnappingthatIranintohiminthegym.Wewerealone.

I had come back formy gym bag and froze when I saw him, unable tospeak.Hestartedtowalkpastandthenstopped.

"Rose…" he began after several uncomfortable moments. "You need toreportwhathappened.Withus.”

I'dbeenwaitingalongtimetotalktohim,butthiswasn'ttheconversationI'dimagined.

"Ican'tdothat.They'llfireyou.Orworse.”"Theyshouldfireme.WhatIdidwaswrong.”"Youcouldn'thelpit.Itwasthespell…”"Itdoesn'tmatter.Itwaswrong.Andstupid.”Wrong?Stupid?Ibitmylip,andtearsthreatenedtofillmyeyes.Iquickly

triedtoregainmycomposure."Look,it'snotabigdeal.”"Itisabigdeal!Itookadvantageofyou.”"No,"Isaidevenly."Youdidn't.”Theremust have been something telling inmy voice because hemetmy

eyeswithadeepandseriousintensity."Rose, I'm seven years older than you. In ten years, that won't mean so

much,butfornow,it'shuge.I'manadult.You'reachild.”Ouch.Iflinched.Easierifhe'djustpunchedme."Youdidn'tseemtothinkIwasachildwhenyouwerealloverme.”Nowheflinched."Justbecauseyourbody…well,thatdoesn'tmakeyouan

adult.We'reintwoverydifferentplaces.I'vebeenoutintheworld.I'vebeenonmyown. I'vekilled,Rose—people,notanimals.Andyou…you're just startingout.Yourlifeisabouthomeworkandclothesanddances.”

"That'sallyouthinkIcareabout?”"No,ofcoursenot.Notentirely.Butit'sallpartofyourworld.You'restill

growingupandfiguringoutwhoyouareandwhat'simportant.Youneedtokeepdoingthat.Youneedtobewithboysyourownage.”

Ididn'twantboysmyownage.ButIdidn'tsaythat.Ididn'tsayanything."Even if you choose not to tell, you need to understand that it was a

mistake.Anditisn'tevergoingtohappenagain,"headded."Becauseyou'retoooldforme?Becauseitisn'tresponsible?”Hisfacewasperfectlyblank."No.BecauseI'mjustnotinterestedinyouin

thatway.”I stared. The message—the rejection—came through loud and clear.

Everything from that night, everything I'd believed so beautiful and full ofmeaning,turnedtodustbeforemyeyes.

"Itonlyhappenedbecauseofthespell.Doyouunderstand?”Humiliated and angry, I refused tomake a fool of myself by arguing or

begging.Ijustshrugged."Yeah.Understood."

Ispenttherestofthedaysulking,ignoringbothLissaandMason'sattemptsto drawme out of my room. It was ironic that I should want to stay inside.Kirovahadbeen impressedenoughbymyperformancewith the rescue toend

myhousearrest.Beforeschoolthenextday,ImademywaytowhereVictorwasbeingheld.

The Academy had honest-to-goodness cells, complete with bars, and twoguardiansstoodwatchin thehallwaynearby.It tooka littlebitoffinaglingonmyparttogetthemtoletmeinsidetotalktohim.EvenNataliewasn'tallowedin.But oneof the guardians had riddenwithme in theSUVandwatchedmeundergoLissa'storture.ItoldhimIneededtoaskVictoraboutwhathe'ddonetoLissa. It was a lie, but the guardians bought it and felt sorry for me. Theyallowedmefiveminutestospeak,backingupadiscretedistancedownthehallwheretheycouldseebutnothear.

StandingoutsideVictor'scell,Icouldn'tbelieveI'doncefeltsorryforhim.Seeinghisnewandhealthybodyenragedme.Hesatcross-leggedonanarrowbed,reading.Whenheheardmeapproach,helookedup.

"WhyRose,whatanicesurprise.Youringenuityneverfailstoimpressme.Ididn'tthinkthey'dallowmeanyvisitors.”

Icrossedmyarms, trying toputona lookof totalguardianfierceness."Iwantyoutobreakthespell.Finishitoff.”

"Whatdoyoumean?”"ThespellyoudidonmeandDimitri.”"Thatspellisdone.Itburneditselfout.”Ishookmyhead."No.Ikeepthinkingabouthim.Ikeepwantingto…”HesmiledknowinglywhenIdidn'tfinish."Mydear,thatwasalreadythere,

longbeforeIsetthatup.”"Itwasn'tlikethis.Notthisbad.”"Maybenotconsciously.Buteverythingelse…theattraction—physicaland

mental—was already in you.And in him. Itwouldn't haveworked otherwise.The spell didn't really add anything new—it just removed inhibitions andstrengthenedthefeelingsyoualreadyhadforeachother.”

"You'relying.Hesaidhedidn'tfeelthatwayaboutme.”"He's lying. I tell you, the spell wouldn't have worked otherwise, and

honestly,heshouldhaveknownbetter.Hehadno right to lethimself feel thatway. You can be forgiven for a schoolgirl's crush. But him? He should havedemonstratedmore control in hiding his feelings. Natalie saw it and toldme.Afterjustafewobservationsofmyown,itwasobvioustometoo.Itgavemetheperfectchancetodistractyouboth.Ikeyedthenecklace'scharmforeachofyou,andyoutwodidtherest.”

"You'reasickbastard,doingthattomeandhim.AndtoLissa.”"IhavenoregretsaboutwhatIdidwithher,"hedeclared,leaningagainst

thewall. "I'ddo it again if I could.Believewhatyouwant, I lovemypeople.

WhatIwantedtodowasintheirbestinterest.Now?Hardtosay.Theyhavenoleader,norealleader.There'snooneworthy,really."Hecockedhisheadtowardme, considering. "Vasilisa actuallymight have been such a one—if she couldever have found it within herself to believe in something and overcome theinfluenceofspirit.It'sironic,really.Spiritcanshapesomeoneintoaleaderandalsocrushherability to remainone.Thefear,depression,anduncertainty takeover,andkeephertruestrengthburieddeepwithinher.Still,shehasthebloodoftheDragomirs,whichisnosmallthing.Andofcourse,shehasyou,hershadow-kissedguardian.Whoknows?Shemaysurpriseusyet.”

"'Shadow-kissed'?"Thereitwasagain,thesamethingMs.Karphadcalledme.

"You'vebeenkissedbyshadows.You'vecrossedintoDeath,intotheotherside,andreturned.Doyouthinksomethinglikethatdoesn'tleaveamarkonthesoul?You have a greater sense of life and theworld—far greater than even Ihave—evenifyoudon'trealizeit.Youshouldhavestayeddead.VasilisabrushedDeathtobringyoubackandboundyoutoherforever.Youwereactuallyinitsembrace,andsomepartofyouwillalwaysrememberthat,alwaysfighttoclingtolifeandexperienceallithas.That'swhyyou'resorecklessinthethingsyoudo.Youdon'tholdbackyour feelings,yourpassion,youranger. Itmakesyouremarkable.Itmakesyoudangerous.”

Ididn'tknowwhattosaytothat.Iwasspeechless,whichheseemedtolike."It'swhatcreatedyourbond,too.Herfeelingsalwayspressoutofher,onto

others.Most people can't pick up on them unless she's actually directing herthoughtstowardthemwithcompulsion.You,however,haveamindsensitivetoextrasensory forces—hers in particular." He sighed, almost happily, and IrememberedreadingthatVladimirhadsavedAnnafromdeath.Thatmusthavemadetheirbond,too."Yes,thisridiculousAcademyhasnoideawhattheyhaveineitheryouorher. Ifnot for the fact that Ineeded tokillyou, Iwouldhavemadeyoupartofmyroyalguardwhenyouwereolder.”

"Youneverwould'vehadaroyalguard.Don'tyouthinkpeoplewouldhavebeenweirdedoutbyyousuddenlyrecoveringlikethat?EvenifnoonefoundoutaboutLissa,Tatiananeverwouldhavemadeyouking.”

"Youmay be right, but it doesn'tmatter. There are other ways of takingpower.Sometimesit'snecessarytogooutsidetheestablishedchannels.Doyouthink Kenneth is the only Moroi who follows me? The greatest and mostpowerful revolutionsoften startveryquietly,hidden in the shadows."Heeyedme."Rememberthat.”

Odd sounds came from the detention center's entrance, and I glancedtowardwhere I'd come in.Theguardianswhohad letme inweregone.From

around thecorner, Ihearda fewgruntsand thumps. I frownedandcranedmyheadtogetabetterlook.

Victorstoodup."Finally.”Fearspikeddownmyspine—atleastuntilIsawNatalieroundthecorner.Mixed sympathy and anger flitted throughme, but I forced a kind smile.

She probablywouldn't see her father again once they took him.Villain or no,theyshouldbeallowedtosaygoodbye.

"Hey,"Isaid,watchingherstridetowardme.Therewasanunusualpurposeinhermovements that somepart ofmewhisperedwasn't right. "I didn't thinkthey'dletyouin."Ofcourse,theyweren'tsupposedtohaveletmeineither.

Shewalkedrightuptomeand—noexaggeration—launchedmeagainstthefarwall.Mybodyhitithard,andblackstar-burstsdancedacrossmyvision.

"What?…"Iputahandtomyforeheadandtriedtogetup.Unconcerned about me now, Natalie unlocked Victor's cell with a set of

keysI'dseenononeoftheguardian'sbelts.Staggeringtomyfeet,Iapproachedher.

"Whatareyoudoing?”Sheglancedupatme,andthat'swhenIsawit.Thefaintringofredaround

herpupils.Skintoopale,evenforaMoroi.Bloodsmudgedaroundhermouth.Andmosttellingofall,thelookinhereyes.Alooksocoldandsoevil,myheartnearlycametoastandstill.Itwasalookthatsaidshenolongerwalkedamongtheliving—alookthatsaidshewasnowoneoftheStrigoi.

Twenty-four

IN SPITE OF ALL THE training I'd received, all the lessons on Strigoihabitsandhowtodefendagainstthem,I'dnevereveractuallyseenone.ItwasscarierthanI'dexpected.

Thistime,whensheswungatmeagain,Iwasready.Sortof.Idodgedback,slippingoutofreach,wonderingwhatchanceIhad.IrememberedDimitri'sjokeaboutthemall.Nosilverstake.Nothingtocutherheadoffwith.Nowaytosetheronfire.Runningseemedlikethebestoptionafterall,butshewasblockingmyway.

Feelinguseless,Isimplybackeddownthehallassheadvancedonme,hermovementsfarmoregracefulthanthey'deverbeeninlife.

Then,alsofasterthanshe'devermovedinlife,sheleaptout,grabbedme,and slammedmy head against thewall. Pain exploded inmy skull, and I feltprettysurethatwasbloodItastedinthebackofmymouth.Frantically,Ifoughtagainst her, trying to mount some kind of defense, but it was like fightingDimitrioncrack.

"Mydear,"murmuredVictor, "trynot tokillher ifyoudon'thave to.Wemightbeabletouseherlater.”

Nataliepausedinherattack,givingmeamomenttobackup,butshenevertookhercoldeyesoffme."I'lltrynotto.”

Therewasaskepticaltoneinhervoice."Getoutofherenow.I'llmeetyoutherewhenI'mdone.”

"Ican'tbelieveyou!"Iyelledafterhim."YougotyourowndaughtertoturnStrigoi?”

"A last resort. A necessary sacrifice made for the greater good. Natalieunderstands."Heleft.

"Doyou?"IhopedIcouldstallherwithtalking,justlikeinthemovies.IalsohopedmyquestionswouldhidehowutterlyandcompletelyterrifiedIwas."Doyouunderstand?God,Natalie.You…youturned.Justbecausehetoldyouto?”

"Myfather'sagreatman,"shereplied."He'sgoingtosavetheMoroifromtheStrigoi.”

"Areyouinsane?"Icried.Iwasbackingupagainandsuddenlyhitthewall.Mynailsdugintoit,asthoughIcoulddigmywaythrough."YouareaStrigoi.”

Sheshrugged,almostseemingliketheoldNatalie."Ihadtodoittogethimout of here before the others came. One Strigoi to save all of theMoroi. It'sworthit,worthgivingupthesunandthemagic.”

"Butyou'llwanttokillMoroi!Youwon'tbeabletohelpit.”

"He'll help me stay in control. If not, then they'll have to kill me." Shereached out and grabbed my shoulders, and I shuddered at how casually shetalkedaboutherowndeath.Itwasalmostascasualasthewayshewasnodoubtcontemplatingmydeath.

"Youareinsane.Youcan'tlovehimthatmuch.Youcan'treally—”Shethrewmeintoawallagain,andasmybodycollapsedinaheaponthe

floor,IhadafeelingIwouldn'tbegettingupthistime.Victorhadtoldhernottokillme…but therewasa look inhereyes,a look that saidshewanted to.Shewantedtofeedoffme;thehungerwasthere.ItwastheStrigoiway.Ishouldn'thavetalkedtoher,Irealized.I'dhesitated,justasDimitrihadwarned.

Andthen,suddenly,hewasthere,chargingdownthehallwaylikeDeathinacowboyduster.

Natalie spun around. Shewas fast, so fast. ButDimitri was fast too andavoidedherattack,alookofpurepowerandstrengthonhisface.Withaneeriefascination, Iwatched themmove,circlingeachother likepartners inadeadlydance. She was stronger than him, clearly, but she was also a fresh Strigoi.Gainingsuperpowersdoesn'tmeanyouknowhowtousethem.

Dimitri,however,knewhowtousetheoneshehad.Afterbothgivingandreceivingsomevicioushits,hemadehismove.Thesilver stake flashed inhishand like a streak of lightning, then it snaked forward—into her heart. Heyankeditoutandsteppedback,hisfaceimpassiveasshescreamedandfell tothefloor.Afterafewhorriblemoments,shestoppedmoving.

Justasquickly,hewasleaningoverme,slippinghisarmsundermybody.Hestoodup,carryingmelikehehadwhenIhurtmyankle.

"Hey,Comrade," Imurmured,myownvoice soundingsleepy. "YouwererightaboutStrigoi."Theworldstartedtodarken,andmyeyelidsdrooped.

"Rose. Roza. Open your eyes." I'd never heard his voice so strained, sofrantic."Don'tgotosleeponme.Notyet.”

I squinted up at him as he carried me out of the building, practicallyrunningtowardtheclinic."Washeright?”

"Who?”"Victor…hesaiditcouldn'thaveworked.Thenecklace.”Istartedtodriftoff,lostintheblacknessofmymind,butDimitriprompted

mebacktoconsciousness."Whatdoyoumean?”"The spell.Victor said you had towantme…to care aboutme…for it to

work."Whenhedidn'tsayanything,Itriedtogriphisshirt,butmyfingersweretooweak."Didyou?Didyouwantme?”

Hiswordscameoutthickly."Yes,Roza.Ididwantyou.Istilldo.Iwish…

wecouldbetogether.”"Thenwhydidyoulietome?”Wereachedtheclinic,andhemanagedtoopenthedoorwhilestillholding

me.Assoonashesteppedinside,hebeganyellingforhelp."Whydidyoulie?"Imurmuredagain.Stillholdingmeinhisarms,helookeddownatme.Icouldhearvoicesand

footstepsgettingcloser."Becausewecan'tbetogether.”"Becauseoftheagething,right?"Iasked."Becauseyou'remymentor?”His fingertipgentlywipedawaya tear that had escapeddownmycheek.

"That's part of it," he said. "But also…well, you and I will both be Lissa'sguardianssomeday.Ineedtoprotectheratallcosts.IfapackofStrigoicome,Ineedtothrowmybodybetweenthemandher.”

"I know that. Of course that's what you have to do." The black sparklesweredancinginfrontofmyeyesagain.Iwasfadingout.

"No.IfIletmyselfloveyou,Iwon'tthrowmyselfinfrontofher.I'llthrowmyselfinfrontofyou.”

Themedicalteamarrivedandtookmeoutofhisarms.Andthatwashow,twodaysafterbeingdischarged,Iendedupbackinthe

clinic.Mythirdtimeinthetwomonthswe'dbeenbackattheAcademy.Ithadtobe some kind of record. I definitely had a concussion and probably internalbleeding, but we never really found out.When your best friend is a kick-asshealer,yousortofdon'thavetoworryaboutthosethings.

Istillhadtostaythereforacoupleofdays,butLissa—andChristian,hernew sidekick—almost never leftmy sidewhen theyweren't in class.Throughthem, I learned bits and pieces about the outside world. Dimitri had realizedthere was a Strigoi on campus when they'd found Natalie's victim dead anddrainedofblood:Mr.Nagyofallpeople.Asurprisingchoice,butsincehewasolder, he'd been able to put up less of a fight.NomoreSlavic art for us.Theguardians in thedetentioncenterhadbeen injuredbutnotkilled.She'd simplyslammedthemaroundasshehadme.

Victorhadbeenfoundandrecapturedwhiletryingtoescapecampus.Iwasglad,eventhoughitmeantNatalie'ssacrificehadbeenfornothing.RumorssaidthatVictorhadn't seemedafraidatallwhen the royalguardscameandcarriedhim away. He'd simply smiled the whole time, like he had some secret theydidn'tknowabout.

Inasmuchas itcould, lifereturnedtonormalafter that.Lissadidnomorecutting.Thedoctorprescribedhersomething—ananti-depressantoranti-anxietydrug, I couldn't remember which—that made her feel better. I'd never really

knownanythingaboutthosekindsofpills.Ithoughttheymadepeoplesillyandhappy.Butitwasapilllikeanyother,meanttofixsomething,andmostlyitjustkepthernormalandfeelingstable.

Whichwasagoodthing—becauseshehadsomeotherissuestodealwith.Like Andre. She'd finally believed Christian's story, and allowed herself toacknowledgethatAndremightnothavebeentheheroshe'dalwaysbelievedhimtobe.Itwashardonher,butshefinallyreachedapeacefuldecision,acceptingthathecouldhavehadbothgoodandbadsides,likewealldo.Whathe'ddonetoMiasaddenedher,butitdidn'tchangethefactthathe'dbeenagoodbrotherwholovedher.Mostimportantly,itfinallyfreedherfromfeelinglikesheneededtobehim tomake her family proud. She could be herself—which she proveddailyinherrelationshipwithChristian.

Theschoolstillcouldn'tgetover that.Shedidn'tcare.She laughed itoff,ignoring the shocked looks and disdain from the royals who couldn't believeshe'd date someone from a humiliated family. Not all of them felt that waythough. Somewho had gotten to know her during her brief social whirlwindactuallylikedherforher,nocompulsionnecessary.Theylikedherhonestyandopenness,preferringittothegamesmostroyalsplayed.

Alotofroyalsignoredher,ofcourse,andtalkedviciouslyaboutherbehindher back. Most surprising of all, Mia— despite being utterly humiliated—managed to wiggle back into the good graces of a couple of these royals. Itprovedmypoint.Shewouldn'tstaydownforlong.And,infact,IsawthefirstsignsofherrevengelurkingagainwhenIwalkedpastheronedayonthewaytoclass.Shestoodwithafewotherpeopleandspokeloudly,clearlywantingmetohear.

"—perfectmatch.Bothofthemarefromcompletelydisgracedandrejectedfamilies.”

I clenchedmy teethandkeptwalking, followinghergaze towhereLissaandChristianstood.Theywerelost in theirownworldandformedagorgeouspicture,sheblondandfairandheblue-eyedandblack-haired.Icouldn'thelpbutstare too. Mia was right. Both of their families were disgraced. Tatiana hadpubliclydenouncedLissa,andwhilenoone"blamed"theOzerasforwhathadhappenedtoChristian'sparents,therestoftheroyalMoroifamiliescontinuedtokeeptheirdistance.

ButMiahadbeenrightabout theotherpart too.Insomeways,LissaandChristian were perfect for each other. Maybe they were outcasts, but theDragomirsandOzerashadoncebeenamongthemostpowerfulMoroileaders.And in only a very short time, Lissa and Christian had started shaping oneanotherinwaysthatcouldputthemrightuptherewiththeirancestors.Hewas

pickingupsomeofherpolishandsocialpoise;shewaslearningtostandupforher passions. Themore I watched them, themore I could see an energy andconfidenceradiatingaroundthem.

Theyweren'tgoingtostaydowneither.AndIthinkthat,alongwithLissa'skindness,mayhavebeenwhatattracted

peopletoher.Oursocialcirclebegantosteadilygrow.Masonjoined,ofcourse,andmadenosecretofhisinterestinme.Lissateasedmealotaboutthat,andIdidn'tyetknowwhattodoabouthim.Partofmethoughtmaybeitwastimetogivehimashotasaseriousboyfriend,eventhoughtherestofmeyearnedforDimitri.

For themost part,Dimitri treatedme just like anyonewould expect of amentor.Hewasefficient.Fond.Strict.Understanding.Therewasnothingoutoftheordinary,nothingthatwouldmakeanyonesuspectwhathadpassedbetweenus—saveforanoccasionalmeetingofoureyes.AndonceIovercamemyinitialemotional reaction, I knew he was—technically—right about us. Age was aproblem, yes, particularlywhile Iwas still a student at theAcademy.But theotherthinghe'dmentioned…ithadneverenteredmymind.Itshouldhave.Twoguardians ina relationshipcoulddistracteachother fromtheMoroi theyweresupposedtoprotect.Wecouldn'tallowthat tohappen,couldn'triskherlifeforourownwants.Otherwise,we'dbenobetterthantheBadicaguardianwho'drunoff.I'dtoldDimitrioncethatmyownfeelingsdidn'tmatter.Shecamefirst.

IjusthopedIcouldproveit."It'stoobadaboutthehealing,"Lissatoldme."Hmm?"We sat in her room, pretending to study, but mymind was off

thinkingaboutDimitri. I'd lecturedheraboutkeepingsecrets,but Ihadn't toldher about him or about how close I'd come to losingmy virginity. For somereason,Icouldn'tbringmyselftotell.

Shedroppedthehistorybookshe'dbeenholding."ThatIhadtogiveupthehealing.And the compulsion."A frown crossed her face at that last part. Thehealing had been regarded as a wondrous gift in need of further study; thecompulsionhadmetwithseriousreprimandsfromKirovaandMs.Carmack."Imean,I'mhappynow.Ishouldhavegottenhelpalongtimeago—youwererightaboutthat.I'mgladI'monthemedication.ButVictorwasrighttoo.Ican'tusespiritanymore.Icanstillsenseit,though…Imissbeingabletotouchit.”

Ididn't entirelyknowwhat to say. I likedherbetter like this.Losing thatthreatofmadnesshadmadeherwholeagain,confidentandoutgoing, just liketheLissa I'd alwaysknownand loved.Seeingher now, itwas easy to believewhat Victor had said about her becoming a leader. She reminded me of herparents and ofAndre—how they used to inspire devotion in thosewho knew

them."Andthat'sanotherthing,"shecontinued."HesaidIcouldn'tgiveitup.He

wasright.Ithurts,nothavingthemagic.Iwantitsobadlysometimes.”"Iknow,"Isaid.Icouldfeelthatachewithinher.Thepillshaddulledher

magic,butnotourbond."AndIkeepthinkingaboutallthethingsIcoulddo,allthepeopleIcould

help."Shelookedregretful."You have to help yourself first," I told her fiercely. "I don't want you

gettinghurtagain.Iwon'tletyou.”"I know. Christian says the same thing." She got that dopey smile she

alwaysdidwhenshethoughtabouthim.IfI'dknownwhatidiotsbeinginlovewouldmake them, Imight not have been so keen to get them back together."AndIguessyouguysareright.Better towant themagicandbesane than tohaveitandbealunatic.There'snomiddleground.”

"No,"Iagreed."Notwiththis.”Then, out of nowhere, a thought smacked me in the head. Therewas a

middleground.Natalie'swordsremindedmeofit.It'sworthit,worthgivingupthesunandthemagic.

Themagic.Ms. Karp hadn't become Strigoi simply because she'd gone crazy. She'd

becomeStrigoitostaysane.BecomingStrigoicutapersoncompletelyofffrommagic.Indoingthat,shecouldn'tuseit.Shecouldn'tfeelit.Shewouldn'twantitanymore.StaringatLissa,Ifeltaknotofworrycoilwithinme.

What if she figured thatout?Would shewant todo it too?No, Iquicklydecided.Lissawouldneverdothat.Shewastoostrongaperson,toomoral.Andso long as she stayed on the pills, her higher reasoningwould keep her fromdoingsomethingsodrastic.

Still, the whole concept prodded me to find out one last thing. Thefollowingmorning,Iwenttothechapelandwaitedinoneofthepewsuntilthepriestshowedup.

"Hello, Rosemarie," he said, clearly surprised. "Can I help you withsomething?”

Istoodup."IneedtoknowmoreaboutSt.Vladimir.Ireadthatbookyougavemeandacoupleothers."Bestnottotellhimaboutstealingtheonesintheattic."Butnobodytoldhowhedied.Whathappened?Howdidhislifeend?Washe,like,martyred?”

Thepriest'sbushyeyebrowsrose."No.Hediedofoldage.Peacefully.”"You'resure?Hedidn'tbecomeStrigoiorkillhimself?”"No,ofcoursenot.Whywouldyouthinkthat?”

"Well…hewasholyandeverything,buthewasalsokindofcrazy,right?Ireadaboutit.Ithoughthemighthave,Idon'tknow,givenintothat.”

Hisfacewasserious."It'struehefoughtdemons—insanity—hiswholelife.It was a struggle, and he didwant to die sometimes. But he overcame it. Hedidn'tletitdefeathim.”

I stared in wonder. Vladimir wouldn't have had pills, and he'd clearlycontinuedtousemagic.

"How?Howdidhedothat?”"Willpower,Iguess.Well..."Hepaused."ThatandAnna.”"Shadow-kissedAnna,"Imurmured."Hisguardian.”Thepriestnodded."Shestayedwithhim.Whenhegrewweak,shewasthe

onewhoheldhimup.Sheurgedhimtostaystrongandtonevergiveintohismadness.”

I left thechapel inadaze.Annahaddoneit.AnnahadletVladimirwalkthatmiddleground,helpinghimtoworkmiraclesintheworldwithoutmeetingahorribleend.Ms.Karphadn'tbeenas lucky.Shehadn'thadaboundguardian.Shehadn'thadanyonetoholdherup.

Lissadid.Smiling,Icutacrossthequadrangletowardthecommons.Ifeltbetterabout

lifethanIhadinaverylongtime.Wecoulddothis,Lissaandme.Wecoulddoittogether.

Justthen,Isawadarkfigureoutofthecornerofmyeye.Itswoopedpastme and landed on a nearby tree. I stoppedwalking. Itwas a raven, large andfierce-looking,withshiningblackfeathers.

Amomentlater,Irealizeditwasn'tjustaraven;itwastheraven.TheoneLissahadhealed.Nootherbirdwouldlandsoclosetoadhampir.Andnootherbird would be looking at me in such an intelligent, familiar way. I couldn'tbelievehewasstillaround.Achillrandownmyspine,andIstartedtobackup.Thenthetruthhitme.

"You'reboundtohertoo,aren'tyou?"Iasked,fullyawarethatanyonewhosawmewouldthinkIwascrazy."Shebroughtyouback.You'reshadow-kissed.”

Thatwasactuallyprettycool.Iheldoutmyarmtoit,halfhopingit'dcomelandonmeinsomesortofdramatic,movie-worthygesture.AllitdidwaslookatmelikeIwasanidiot,spreaditswings,andflyoff.

Iglaredasitflewoffintothetwilight.ThenIturnedaroundandheadedofftofindLissa.Fromfaraway,Iheardthesoundofcawing,almostlikelaughter.