WHAT IS DISCIPLINE?

POSITIVE DISCIPLINE

VALUE LINE ACTIVITY:

*__________________________________*Spanking is effective I don’t believe in

spanking

Mark where you stand on this line on a piece of paper and list reasons for your stance on this issue.

Methods of Discipline

Get into groups of 6Brainstorm all of the kinds of discipline you

have heard of Arrange them on a long sheet of construction

paper from least acceptable to most acceptable

Circle all of the methods that an adult should not do to another adult

Put a square around any that an adult would be arrested for if done to an other adult

DISCIPLINE

“OK, here are your options:jump and discover the joyof flight, or don’t jump and Ikick your butt out of the tree.

What kind of parenting is this?

WHAT ABOUT SPANKING?

Concerns: Is it a physical assault on a child? Does it teach children to deal with problems in a

physical way? Does it lead to child abuse? Does it teach only outer control that stops the

behavior for a short time? Does it create feelings of hatred and revenge?

RedirectionReasoningTime outSetting Rules/limitsModelingListeningReinforcementOffering choices

Acceptable outletsAvoid

overstimulationPositive guidanceNatural & logical

consequencesAge appropriate

activitiesAvoid unrealistic

expectations

Other Methods of Discipline

TYPES OF PARENTING:

AUTHORITARIAN:

External Control Punishment Order without freedom

Drawback – can create rebellion or submission/ dependence

3 R’s of punishment:

1. RESENTMENT2. REVENGE3. RETREAT

1. Low self esteem2. Sneaky

Where did we ever get the crazy idea that in order to make a child do better, first we have to make them feel worse?

Children do better when they feel better!

TYPES OF PARENTING:

PERMISSIVE:

Freedom without order No restriction, rules, No consequences

Drawback – Can create a manipulative personality, aggression, and independence.

TYPES OF PARENTING:

AUTHORITATIVE (Democratic):

Mutual Respect Cooperation Freedom with Order

Creates a self disciplined child who is responsible for own actions.

WHY DO CHILDREN MISBEHAVE?

A misbehaving child is a discouraged child. Why?

MISBEHAVIOR:

Is based on a child’s mistaken interpretation of how to find BELONGING & SIGNIFICANCE!

4 GOALS OF MISTAKEN BEHAVIOR:

1. Getting attention

2. Seeking power3. Getting revenge

4. Giving up

Solution to Attention Problems:

Ignore if possibleGive attention when goodRedirectLogical consequencesChoices

Solution to Power Problems:

WithdrawCool offProblem solve togetherWin cooperationAct

Solution to Revenge Problems:

Withdraw from revenge cycleWin child overSolve the problemTake away items they could

destroyApologize if needed

Solution to Inadequacy Problems:

Avoid pityEncourage & trainCreate small

successesDon’t give up

General Tips for Guidance:

• Before giving directions, make sure you have the child’s attention

• Use positive statements to give directions• Begin directions with an action word that tells

the child what to do• Give only one direction at a time• Whenever possible, give simple reasons for your

directions• Make sure the message of LOVE always gets

through• Timing: It is impossible to solve problems at the

time of the conflict• Children will listen to you if they feel listened to

NATURAL & LOGICAL CONSEQUENCES:

NATURAL: Simply happen naturally No coat = cold

LOGICAL: Are decided upon and imposed by parents or teachers One needs to be:

Firm Calm Positive toward child

3 R’S OF LOGICAL CONSEQUENCES:

1. RELATED2. RESPECTFU

L3. RESONABL

E

                                                     

TIME OUT: An alternative to spanking.

1. Gives child time to calm down & time to think about the correct way to act.

2. Child is moved away from others – an effective consequence.

TIME OUT GUIDELINES:

Choose a location that is dull and away from others.

Use time out immediately after misbehavior occurs.

Length of time = 1 minute for each year of age.

Don’t’ talk to child until afterwards (Make sure they understand the “WHY”).

Reward good behavior after time out, as soon as they do something positive.

DISCIPLINE STEPS:

1. Redirect2. Check it out3. Speak to the child about the problem4. Give choices5. Use logical or natural consequences6. Use time out if still out of control

CLASSROOM DISCIPLINE:

Have rules and remind them often

                                                                                            

Read:“Children want fences

KEEP RULES SHORT & SIMPLE

1. Be nice to teacher and classmates

2. Raise hand to speak

3. Walk in halls

CLASSROOM DISCIPLINE for Teachers

Be silent or whisperResist giving attention to the disruptor

“Someone is disturbing the class”

Move closer, place hand on shoulderInvolve them Talk privately

“What can I do to get your help?”

FORBIDDEN DISCIPLINE ACTIONS:

SPANKINGSLAPPINGHITTINGSHAKINGPULLINGPINCHING

NO TEASINGNO HUMILIATIONNO INSULTSNO THREATENINGNO FRIGHTENINGNO LAUGHING AT

Confirmed incidents will be grounds for immediatedismissal from a childcare job.

ALWAYS REMEMBER:

MISTAKES R WUNDERFULL OPPERTUNITEEZ 2 LERN!Recognize your mistakeReconcile “I’m sorry”Resolve: Focus on solutions rather than blame.