Post on 13-Mar-2016
description
Copyright © 2014 Manuel Arturo Abreu.Covert art by Štěpán Karásek, in the public domain.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except in the case of a reviewer, who may quote brief passages embodied in critical articles or in a review.
Trademarked names appear throughout this book. Rather than use a trademark symbol with every occurrence of a trademarked name, names are used in an editorial fashion, with no intention of infringement of the respective owner’s trademark.
The information in this book is distributed on an “as is” basis, without warranty. Although every precaution has been taken in the preparation of this work, neither the author nor the publisher shall have any liability to any person or entity with respect to any loss or damage caused or alleged to be caused directly or indirectly by the information contained in this book.
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contents:poetry
8 minutes 3
app for optionally undoing puberty 4
lamprey emoticon 6
my heart is a finch 7
a day spent morphing 8
from 'the tiny manifestos' 10
alternative sources 11
cartoon wrath 13
wait for glows because cars can fake smiles 15
forget us when you get cold 15
a list of 10 things i thought of 16
eyelid 17
all along 19
speak tongues and faint 20
upon being gravely summoned 21
untitled 22
curating water 23
critical theory buzzwords as coping mechanisms 24
sockshare 25
a piece from 2006 called 'dad' 26
My feelings are shaped like a body 27
fake dark 29
FORGIVE EVERYONE 31
all anyone ever wants 33
clues for the pinker shout 34
everything started happening after rehab 35
1
photos
i can't have casual conversations 5
my baby 6
absent referent 9
microwaved ocean 1 12
google maps glitch town screencaps 13
untitled portrait 18
found image 21
microwaved ocean 2 30
found image (what is a right?) 36
diy hypnotherapy 38
the inscriptions are everywhere 39
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8 minutes
glass voice and animal earsglass throat clink to a halt, kneelthen sound of intangible machinescup drawn too full
falling bodies don't cut corners they form patternsscreams go up like hands of smokepigeons, unfurnished wingspans
i hear a sound and look:just the back of my head
in a dark lakei am always the opheliadry flower, bent light stigma
dilate time, dark of heartnesssquirting wax, thrummingmoves through with a different goinga darker pace and cloying
cats lie therefore they can write poemsmuscles uncoiling like flowers or windowsin 8 minutes the sun's mouth will be closed closed forever
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app for optionally undoing puberty
there are only wrong wordsSo I don't worry about it too much
every time i swallow it hurts
just enough to communicate functionally, is exhausting,being exhausted is something I am amazingly capable of
to speak in such a way that i have to repeat myselfthe words have their ears
i keep repeating 'no map without tongue'i just want more time to think of a response
having a hard time getting over our conversationarticulating the resonant frequencies of the room we're in
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my heart is a finch
my external hard drive is 2 terabytesits name is fiona as in fiona applethere you go this is my big finch heartfar away from the city like a forest nurse
take me to a whooping shirebecause i don't know how to dealwhen a stomach loves a bootthe boot goes into full whallop
white dudes are scary sometimesout here i'm lit game mandy moorea big calm, metadata for the long haula joy that appears on the outside as terror
do you feel more like yourself around strangers
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a day spent morphing
i make the mistakethinking i am exactly privyto the shape of that misunderstanding
i make an embeddingthis is the essential cursory, the nodea principle of nonsense reified
feelings cannot go into airplane modeit’s the crucial facet of a conceitno dimension is obstructed by thinking
but the images present a bog to climbstepping around erasure, failure is a strategya motivated crookedizing
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from 'the tiny manifestos'
seems like asking questions should not be like shopping
seems like the best way to answer a question is to go backwards
seems bad for me to assume i have no common ground with people
seems like there should be an app for remembering the beauty of all feeling
seems like we have to decide about the dark parts of imagination like are they safe
seems like articulation of possible worlds does not increase the subject's happiness
seems like i am really into balloon metaphors these days, in my head
seems like my truth buzzes in me, randomly, like a filament
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alternative sources
Observation of the sun reveals
As far as life on earth is
the sun is, Light and heat
are not the only forms of energy
As with any other star, the
sun ; When we observe the sun in
visible light, the surface,
Another is airglow. Ablation:
the burning away of the leading
surface of an object.
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cartoon wrath
I would ride my bike into town to pick up dad's newspaperme never having learned how to ridedad never having learned how to read
to peek thru radiant logoand put screwdrivers inside, find clothes boil them until they finally fit in thimbles
As a pile of atoms I am not alivebig scar vining down my dad's right leg, like a strophemom vacuuming slowly. A bubble in honey
Mom hated when buildings sneeredlips part as tho to speak but they do not speaktheir cartoon wrath like the coin in a turmoil of fauna
trains go by slurping thunderheads out my headnervous light that smells like breadhome from the hospital dad says “my spine's like a riddle”
none of these trains are oursthe sparks on the tracks are like ratssomeone walks past, meaning is not use it is doubt
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wait for glows because cars can fake smiles
Broken trains of thought are like blowholesmemory expands without us catching upA rock can meditate on the taste of allergy pills
soon after it takes a cold shower
the structure of the pearly rainPlease try never to think of ghosts as nectarplease remember humans haunt ghostsmagical thinking is circadianthe radius of despair is a hurt nest
I swear to you that everything is inside this balloon satellite
forget us when you get cold
angle kin meat
sun l i n e w o r k poke
farce grab strobe
age never, nectar branch
balloon roared intuit
momentum sphere... mimic
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a list of 10 things i thought of
1. Strangers.
2. The combinations of wind.
3. Dark wet stones & the fat worms
under them.
4. Taking a piece of a camera’s soul
whenever a picture of me is taken.
5. Imagining the air I breathe as string.
6. My feet are hands.
7. My hands are eyes.
8. Eradicating my own voice.
9. The world resonating through me
in those moments when it’s
engorged with meaning.
10. Being able to pay attention to myself.
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eyelid
callous prancehold it longer
be the smoketiny coughing
coughing clockrounded rain
blur a nocturnedrape the street
cake the bodyhungry grin
swollen cornernappy light
[repeat for every blink]
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speak tongues and faint
my heart moves not to a clave in this pathmark
this is the duty of the unwandering
you spurn me at an ocean like black cellophane
white beach and forms thrown on the wall
your skin had the orange rind candy smell
make me want to speak tongues and faint
here now, the swallowing room that i fear
i can disguise you no longer
in my usual cold metaphor
my dark parts thrush like traffic
i walk around your city like i'm inside a throat
my heart beats to the pace of your bookmarks
going nowhere with the bliss of gone ruths
i have never met anyone named ruth
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upon being gravely summoned
pale orange roomlike a sundressas she feared it would not be
yet after a glance for lackand upon being gravely summonedshe spirits away all her pity.
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untitled
The downtrodden ewe
in a field of empty cashews
& a paranoid wind blew by:
the world in the mind of a fly.
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curating water
the face
the gentle gif blowing in the wind ~
the stark context
the face again
the broken word
the pulling finger
the way the shoe shows wear
the gentle lungless moon
like a worm breathing through its skin
the face is weaponized
return to infinite embrace
an intimate architecture
like a pinker cave
the face broke words
like pimple in song
a carving whisk (verb)
radiant utmost embrace
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critical theory buzzwords as coping mechanisms
post-post-continental anti-rationalist appropriation aesthetics,
ontologized sublimity of affect-networks, augmented spirituality,
the withdrawal of the identified-object into an abundance of the sensory (there are always more affects than objects/objects are multiply-anchored w/ affects),
anti-accelerationist object-oriented de-ontology,
dismantling of the tyranny of positive propositions,
acceptance of paradox, 'shifting away from judgment,
unlearning the shame we have of having internalized categorical thinking in order to start dismantling the categories in earnest instead of just aestheticizing/fetishizing the discourse of dismantling…. lmao
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sockshare
I am contused in the vein
of polyp sacristies
forgetting the engine
of lust/idiot compassion
that murdered us in the first night
*
You are confused in the field
thinking nature is bleak
like the torque of a cadence
remembering how I hurt you
because it is winter and I am awful
*
hate grows like crystals
histrionic in their stillness
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My feelings are shaped like a body
1
it makes me feel too manhattan
listening to leonard cohen
plz stop telling me “the internet is literally hell”
tho bristling in my manic zen of 45 open tabs
i do wonder does the internet make us evil
and ‘Share’ on my timeline
a photo someone posted that
says “does the internet make us evil”
2
Remember when desperately
we threw the airplane pillow back and forth
& i pretended to hate the airplaine pillow
u said ‘the reason I am alive is this airplane pillow’
I pretended to suffocate u for 3sec with the airplane pillow
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3
And we talked about that Félix González-Torres piece
Untitled (Perfect Lovers)
The clocks touch and are set in sync
during the course of the exhibition they unsync
Imagine a puzzle whose pieces
changed shape as you tried to assemble it
4
On a wells fargo business card
you wrote “memory has a shape (?)”
The horse and carriage upside-down in a corner
Have you ever sometimes left a rash alone
to see how bad you let it get before you apply cold cream?
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FORGIVE EVERYONE
she loves FORGIVE EVERYONE's don't give a fuck attitude
a rubber band dressing up as a bruise in front of a twitching mirror
*
FORGIVE EVERYONE seems like a good stop to transfer at but her phone
doesn't have enough battery to check
*
she remembers that the moment her plane landed FORGIVE EVERYONE came on on shuffle, it seemed cloying
a 'perfect accident' commercial
*
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meaning to click 'citation'she clicks FORGIVE EVERYONEit starts playing, she cries a littleshe used to listen to it with her brother
on a radio, soft volume under a pillow
her parents didn't let her wear pantsor listen to secular musiclike FORGIVE EVERYONEthey said it was satanic
her father is like a demon gel
*
FORGIVE EVERYONEgives her that feelinglike she's a pew
FORGIVE EVERYONE makes her think'how fat can a chance get'makes her say 'dear dad fuck baseball'
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depart from leaf
i’m mournful fairy lightningsinging, far
& all quakingin delicateslimes.
my dreamof alwaysbeginning has
the torqueof a hand,emptying.
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clues for the pinker shout
1. The jungle is yellow.2. An humanlike head.3. A rock in the riverbottom.4. Past subsistence.
1. The river is pinker.2. The body looks like its name.3. Letters in the cereal or soup.4. The next conclusion you shirk.
1. Make a headdress out of leaves or out of what was really going on.2. Make a headdress out of limbs turned raw plastic by their hiding.3. The rocks have language like tree roots going unseen.4. The jungle is the hunting, the ocean of possible killing, not only the place it happens.
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everything started happening after rehab
as a fat child i couldn't do handstands
and feared being ransacked by swans
the tiny chamber ms. trunchbull from matilda
locked kids in turns someone i know on
i thought about that and i liked it
my body has always been a heavy system
but my god is too small, like an army of cucks
i love bouquets of consonants
almost as much as bouquets of empty rooms
my body is a dead battery of forgetting
do you remember the band cute is what we aim for
they had that one song newport cigarettes or something
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acknowledgements
Thanks to my reader.
Thanks to my family and friends.
I love you all.
The image on pages 6-7 is from a YouTube video of Thomas Ades – Totentanz.
The image on page 17 is from an OKCupid ad that reads “Her New Body Made Her Ex Cry. This fitness trick that's just for women is flying off the shelves. Try it for yourself.”
The image on page 36 is a from a YouTube video about ant colony architecture.
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