Motivating by Affirmation

‘Next to physical survival, the greatest need of a human being is psychological survival, to be understood, to be affirmed, to be validated, to be appreciated’Steven Covey, Author:‘The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People’

Employees who aren’t affirmed:

•Will feel unconnected•Will become discouraged•Will complain •Won’t perform •Will think about leaving

1.Words of Affirmation

2.Quality Time

3.Physical Touch

4.Receiving Gifts

5.Acts of Service

1. Words of Affirmation

•Have to HEAR it!•Need lots of verbal affirmation at all stages of a project

•Words need to be:•Encouraging•Specific•Supportive

You can verbally affirm a person for:

•Accomplishments•Character•Personality

Hey Jane , I thought that team newsletter was never going to get done. I think a snail could have done it quicker!..... It looked good though.

What a nightmare… does he realise how hard it was to use that software?

Jane , the work you did on the team newsletter was great. I liked the layout - I didn’t know that you were so creative! I realise it was the first time you’ve used that computer application, it must have been tricky. Once you’ve used it a few times you’ll get quicker at producing the newsletter.’

He likes it…. and thinks I’m creative! I’ll have a little practice using that software before I do next month’s newsletter

2. Quality Time

•Need undivided attention•‘Togetherness’ not just proximity•Focused time•Quality conversation

 

For Quality Conversation you need good listening skills!

•Maintain eye contact•Concentrate•Give positive responses•Ask reflective questions•Ask clarifying questions•Don’t interrupt

 

3. Physical Touch

•Feel affirmed by physical contact•Body language speaks loud and clear

•To touch my body is to touch me•Must learn appropriate touch for the workplace

Responsible and affirming ways of using touch:

•Handshake •High five•Hand on shoulder or arm •Side by side ‘nudge’•Slap on the back (not too rough!!)

Guidelines:

•If the person draws away – back off and give them space

•Leave a way of ‘escape’•Keep touches brief•Don’t be rough•Don’t touch bare skin

4. Receiving Gifts

•Affirmation is felt in the receiving of gifts

•Gifts are visual symbols of appreciation

•Not the intrinsic value that counts

Gift ideas:

• Buy your colleague a coffee or a cake• Bring your colleague a magazine related to

something they are interested in • Give your team member a voucher for

something – lunch at the canteen, tickets to the cinema, etc. 

• Have a bag of ‘inexpensive goodies’ for the team which can be given out to someone each week, eg for best sales figures, best attitude, best smile, etc.

5. Acts of Service

•Will feel affirmed when someone offers help

•‘Actions speak louder than words’•Emotional assurance of being valued is sought when they ask for help

They will appreciate:

•Someone staying after hours to help complete a project

•Someone offering to do a more menial task which allows them to focus on a higher priority

•Someone helping them sort out computer problems

•Assistance with clearing up

‘“Treat a man as he is and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he can and should be and he will become as he can and should be.” 

Steven Covey, Author:‘The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People’

‘Remember, man does not live on bread alone: sometimes he needs a little buttering up.’

John C Maxwell

www.mouldbreakers.co.uk