Listening and Empathy

Post on 17-May-2015

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I presented this lecture on Listening and Empathy to my Fundamentals of Technical Presentations class of 300 students. It covers material in Daniel Pink's A Whole New Mind and in our customized course textbook.

Transcript of Listening and Empathy

Public Speaking for Technical Presentations

AWNM, Chapter 7: EmpathyTextbook Chapter 13: Listening

A Whole New Mind (AWNM)http://www.onbeing.org/blog/an-empathy-video-that-asks-you-to-stand-in-someone-elses-shoes/5063

Empathy is the ability to imagine yourself in someone else’s position and to intuit what that person is feeling. It is the ability to stand in others’ shoes, to see with their eyes, and to feel with their hearts.Is it the same as Sympathy?What is the difference?

A Whole New Mind (AWNM)

Men, Women, and Empathy• Who’s more empathic?• Tied to brain differences (Simon

Baron-Cohen).• Systematizing: exactness,

excellent attention to local detail.• Left Brain = Male Brain• Empathizing: inexactness,

attention to the larger picture, context, with no expectation of lawfulness.• Right Brain = Female Brain

What to DO?

A Whole New Mind (AWNM)

Empathy Can Be Learned.• Cognitive Empathy:

perspective-taking; concentrating on the situation from their side• Affective Empathy: Feel WITH

them. Work to imagine how they feel. This comes through practice.• What precedes most instances

of empathy is the DECISION to empathize.

Chapter 4

Listening:the process of receiving,

attending to, and assigning meaning to aural and visual

stimuli

1.Everyday Importance of Listening

2.The Process of Listening

3.5 Ways of Listening

4.4 Main Listening Styles

5.Barriers To Listening

6.Conversational Narcissism

7.Dialogue

8.Improving Your and Your Audience’s Listening

What We Will Discuss:

Listening Relative to Other Types of Communication

24

20

13

9

8

8

75 Listening

Speaking

Internet

Writing

Reading

Television

Telephone

Email

SMCR Model of Communication

How do you think Listening is important in the following contexts?

College Success in workforce Interpersonal communication Improving your public

speaking skills

Everyday Importance of Listening to . . .

TedTalk: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSohjlYQI2A

1. Receiving Hearing with your

ears/reading/watching2. Responding

Verbal and nonverbal cues that we are attending

3. Recalling What we take away

4. Rating How we evaluate it

The 4 “R”s of Listening

11

5 Ways of Listening1. Discriminative

• Distinguish the auditory and visual stimuli

2. Comprehensive• Understand the message in order

to retain, recall & maybe use info later on

3. Therapeutic• Give help to a person who needs

to talk through a concern

4. Critical• Evaluate the merits of the

message

5. Appreciative • Obtain sensory stimuli or

enjoyment

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4 Main Listening Styles

1. People-oriented• High regard for other’s feelings• Seek to find common ground

with speaker

2. Action-oriented• Like info that is concise,

succinct, free from mistakes

3. Content-oriented• Prefer challenging and complex

messages

4. Time-oriented• Prefer brief listening

encounters

13

Barriers To Listening

Bias Defensive

listening Ambushing Message

Overload Lack of

Interest Listening Gap Focus On Self

Conversational Narcissism The ways American

conversationalists act to turn the topics of ordinary conversations to themselves without showing sustained interest in others’ topics (Charles Derber)

Penelope:http://www.hulu.com/watch/52192

Conversational NarcissismSource: Kenneth A. Cissna (1994). Communication and the ground

of dialogue.

Dialogue involves: View the other person as a

unique, rather than interchangeable part of an event

Encountering the unmeasureable aspects of the other: feelings, emotions

Perceiving the other as a choice-maker who initiates action, rather than simply as a reactor

DialogueSource: Kenneth A. Cissna (1994). Communication and the ground

of dialogue.

Paraphrase Exercise: Should students and teachers with concealed carry permits be allowed to carry weapons at UCF?1. Person # 1 gives their opinion.2. Person #2 paraphrases #1 “So What

You’re Saying Is” then asks them “Did I get that right?” Person #1 says yes or no. When they say yes, Person #2 gives their opinion.

Improving Listening

Ask questions to evaluate meaning

Use Dialogue Enhancers

Look For Cues Use elaboration

strategies Choose to focus Be aware of

fallacies, credibility and appeals

Active Listening

18

Facilitating Increased Listening

If you want audiences to listen: Have a strong &

relevant message Use confident language Offer opportunities for

clarification Assume your audience

may not have the same listening style as you

19

•Empathy•Everyday Importance of Listening•The Process of Listening•Systems Model•5 Ways of Listening •4 Main Listening Styles•Barriers To Listening•Conversational Narcissism•Dialogue•Improving Your and Your Audience’s Listening

Summary

Listening Ted Talkhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSohjlYQI2A

Penelope:http://vimeo.com/30933643

Empathyhttp://www.onbeing.org/blog/an-empathy-video-that-asks-you-to-stand-in-someone-elses-shoes/5063