Post on 19-Jan-2016
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Communicating Conflict
Communicating ConflictMa Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBASanti Djiwandono - EBA
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Conflicts happenConflicts happendodoVV
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channelchannelsendersender
receiverreceiver
messagemessage
encoderencoder decoderdecoder
feedbackfeedback
communications componentscommunications components
contextcontext
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easy to forget communication components
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easy to forget communication components
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easy to forget communication components
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external
internal
timing
distrust
easy to forget communication components
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Communicate with good skill & good willCommunicate with
good skill & good will
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Body Language
Body Languageis the management of
time, space, appearance, posture,
gesture, vocal prosody, touch, smell, facial expression, and eye
contact
is the management of time, space,
appearance, posture, gesture, vocal prosody,
touch, smell, facial expression, and eye
contact
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we’re wired this way
we’re wired this way
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Body LanguageBody Languageis in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full frontal body orientation, positive eye contact, synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
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Body LanguageBody Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
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Body Language - for Leaders
Body Language - for Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’ physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align verbal and non- verbal communication
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ListeningListeningwe will become good
listeners only when we can acknowledge that we have a lot to learn
we will become good listeners only when we can acknowledge that we have a lot to learn
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Blocks to Effective Listening
Blocks to Effective Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
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Are you really listening?
Are you really listening?
QuickTime™ and a decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
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Learn to ListenLearn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
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HowHow
build integration & engagement
communicate with good skill & good will
adaptive
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Common GroundCommon Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
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Authentic LeadersAuthentic Leaders
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Thank youThank you
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Reflection QuestionsReflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who listens well. Can you describe what he or she does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for listening at work?