Conflict Management

Decision Making

“I’m SO Angry!”

Which movie to go see Cut off in traffic Someone spreading rumors ‘Stay at home mom’ or a career How late you can stay at a party Spending money How and where to spend your time Parents disagree with clothes/ hairstyle Can’t go to a school event because it falls on a

religious holiday You were excluded from a group

“What are we so mad about anyway?(examples)

◦ Conflict: a disagreement between people with opposing view points, ideas, or goals.

◦ Conflicts can be an exchange of words◦ Group confrontations can be ongoing◦ Conflicts that involve weapons can be serious◦ Normal?

What is Conflict

Some conflicts are with YOURSELF!

1. Resources: something usable, such as goods , property, money or time.

Examples??? Couples who fight over finances, which restaurant, flu shot dispensed, study or go mall with mom, fighting over the

computer…

2. Values: your beliefs and ideas you consider important

Examples??? Browns fan, daily PE class

3. Emotional Needs: the need to belong and feel respected and worthwhile

examples??? Left out, dis-respected, put down, feel it’s unfair didn't make the science Olympiad, sports team etc…

Three Causes of Conflict

Think of a conflict you’ve had recently and briefly describe.

Answer the following questions in your notes.

1.What was it about?2. What caused it? (Resources, Values, Emotional)

3. Was it resolved? Explain.

Journal Activity

Managing my Anger/ConflictIf I learn to manage my

anger then…If I don’t and conflicts get

out of hand then…

Release frustrations of life.

Calls Attention to Problems

Helps us understand self and other’s values

Increases motivation to take action

Brings about change Healthier relationships

Anger can build and boil over

Can lead to violence Irrational thinking Not pleasant to be

around Lead to depression

(esp.boys)

Calm. It. Down.

Brainstorm

Ask Questions; to learn the other

person’s point of view

Attack the Problem- not the

person!

Explain how you feel; Let each

person tell their side

Talk to a trusted adult

Positive Ways to Manage Anger

Take a time out to cool down

COOL OFF– Calm Down

Make a list Find a middle ground Find a creative solution

Brainstorm reasonable ways to handle the situation

Explain how his or her actions make you feel

“I Feel…”

“hmmm how would I feel”Ask Questions

Learn the other person’s point of view

If you cannot resolve the problem yourself.

Ask for Help

State the Situation ◦ (Identify, ask yourself questions, what choices do you need to make and

who else if anyone is involved) List all possible options.

◦ (List everything, ask for suggestions and make sure they are safe.) Consider the consequences for each option.

◦ Weigh the pros and cons Consider your personal values

◦ (honesty, respect and trust) Make a decision and act. Give specifics.

◦ (Ready to take action, choose a course that supports your values, the impact of all choices on self and others and ask a trusted adult if unsure.)

Evaluate the outcome.◦ (Reach expectations, how did it affect others, how you feel about yourself

and what could you do differently)

Decision-making skills